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“THOR”

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					   ―THOR‖

     by

John McGuigan
                                                              1


FADE IN:
INT. CTA BUS – DAY
A CTA bus slowly plods down the dreary streets of Chicago,
Illinois. It is filled to the brim with passengers, of all
shapes and sizes and colors, going about their daily
business, just trying to get from point A to point B. Yet,
in all the chaos, one passenger manages to stand out.
Sitting in the back of the bus, is a large, burly NORSE
MAN. He wears an oversized fur coat. His beard is long and
mangled. He looks like he could be in his mid-
thirties/early forties, but his eyes have a seriousness to
them that makes him seem eons older.
He sits there awhile, looking rather discontented with his
current state in life. A sense of contempt is cast upon the
fellow passengers. He is not happy to be here.
A SMALL GIRL, maybe 4 or 5, looks over the back of a chair
at him. If he notices her stare, he doesn’t show it. Her
MOM leans over and whispers something in her ear. Quietly,
she hops down off her seat, walks over to the man, and sits
down next to him, continuing to stare up at him. For a
moment, nothing happens.
                     GIRL
           Hi.
The Norse man slowly looks down, mildly surprised at being
spoken to.
                     NORSE MAN
           Good morrow, small one.
                     GIRL
           You’re big.
                     NORSE MAN
                  (cracks the slightest smile)
           This is indeed so.
                     GIRL
           Your jacket makes look like
           that big dumb red monster in
           Bugs Bunny cartoons.
                     NORSE MAN
           I see.



                                                              1
                                                              2

He pauses, waiting for her to go away. She just keeps
staring up at him, kicking her legs off the edge of the
seat.
                   GIRL
         My name’s Jenny, What’s your name?
                   NORSE MAN
              (getting irritated)
         Do you not have a mother
         you can bother?
                   JENNY
         She told me to ask you what
         your name is.
The Norse man looks up and sees Jenny’s mom, staring at him
and giving one of those slight ―Hey you‖ waves.
                   NORSE MAN
              (sighs)
         I have many names. Odinson, Atli,
         Thunder God. I prefer Thor. Yes, The
         Norse God of Thunder. Weilder of
         the Mighty hammer, Mjolnir. Strange, is
         it not?
                      JENNY
                 (fully confused)
         What?
                   THOR
         Does it not vex you, young one, to see
         a God would be reduced to riding a
         transportation vessel with common
         mortal folk?
                      JENNY
         What?
                   THOR
         Things were not always this way, mind
         you. I used to soar among the clouds,
         the wind and rain in my beard, just
         smashing everything in sight with my
         hammer, causing mass destruction in my
         wake for no reason other than my own
         hearty anger.
Jenny is so completely lost on what this whacko is talking
about that she just stares blankly at him.


                                                              2
                                                              3

                   THOR
              (strokes beard)
         Yes, there were some good times in the
         past, long, long ago. Very long ago.
         Your ancestors would have been children
         then, wee womanchild.
                   JENNY
         You have a beard.
                   THOR
         Yes. Good times…
Sounds of battle slowly build. Fade to:
INT. ASGARD – DAY
Subtitle: ―The Ancient Halls of Asgard. Long ago.‖
Thor screams a battle cry in an indecipherable Norse
tongue, swinging his hammer over his head, and leaps at a
giant, 2-story tentacled monster. He is grabbed by one of
the tentacles, and hoisted into the air. His fellow gods,
of which there seem to be about a dozen, are caught up
battling other parts of the creature. Among those gods are
ODIN, Thor’s father; TYR, the war god; FREYJA, Thor’s wife,
the goddess of love.
                   TYR
              (shouting while slicing
              tentacles with a sword)
         Thor! Are you in need?!
Thor is being crushed in the chest by a tentacle wrapped
around him, and is having a hard time breathing.
                    THOR
         NAY!
There is a blast of lightning, and Thor is free.
                   THOR
         I say thee NAY!
He lunges back into battle, swacking tentacles with his big
stone hammer. Odin barks some order at the other gods, but
they do not listen.
Much chaos ensues. The tentacle monster seems angrier than
ever, and the gods have to fight harder just to stand their
ground.



                                                              3
                                                             4

Luckily, Thor, too, is getting angrier by the minute. His
eyes start to glow the blueish glow of electricity. The
hairs in his beard stand on end slightly. He swings his
hammer into things harder.
                   THOR
         BACK! BACK, YOU FOUL BEAST!
All of the other gods slowly stop fighting, as Thor seems
to be pretty much taking care of it. The tentacle monster
slowly starts retreating into the depths of the hole from
which it came.
                   THOR
         IN THE NAME OF ASGARD! (POW!)
         IN THE NAME OF VALHALLA! (SWACK!)
         BY ODIN’S BEARD, I COMMAND YOU! (BAF!)
         GET BACK!
He takes one final blow, and the creature screeches, and
sinks back into the hole.
The gods cheer. Thor’s wife runs up and embraces him. Thor
looks pretty happy with himself. Fade to:
INT. CTA BUS – DAY
The sadder, lamer Thor is still sitting on the bus.
                   THOR
         The world was simpler then, child.
         Battle was simpler. We knew who to
         fight, and they knew to fight. Now,
         things are always…complicated.
He pauses, once again slowly taking in the mundane world
around him.
                   THOR
         Food was simpler. Pork came from a pig.
         You would kill the pig yourself, roast
         it yourself, and eat the meat right off
         it. Have you ever had pork straight
         from the pig? And the mead! By the All-
         Father! None of this fermented bread
         nonsense! Honey! That’s where alcohol
         should come from!
Jenny smiles at him.




                                                             4
                                                           5

                   THOR
         You have no idea what am saying, do
         you?
                   JENNY
         You smell like a pony. I like ponies.
                   JENNY’S MOM
                   (OFF-SCREEN)
         Jenny! C’mon!
                   JENNY
         G’bye, Mr. Thor!
She runs to her mother. The mom winks at Thor as she and
Jenny get off the bus. Thor is left sitting there,
reminiscing his glory days by his lonesome.
EXT. THOR’S APARTMENT – DAY
The bus pulls to a stop, and lets Thor off. He slowly
trudges towards his apartment building.
In the alley next to his building, three GANGSTERS are
beating the snot out of some wimpy looking guy.
Thor looks around the corner.
Gangsters 2 and 3 hold him by the arms while Gangster 1
threatens him to his face.
                   GANGSTER 1
         You think you can squelch Big Vinnie
         outta his cash?!
He punches the wimpy guy in the stomach.
                   WIMPY GUY
         No! I’m good for it! You know I’m good
         for it! Vinnie knows I’m good for it!
         I’ll tell him tomorrow!
                    GANGSTER 1
         Nah.
He pulls a gun out from his coat.
                   GANGSTER 1
         I’ll tell him for ya.
Thor looks away. There is a GUNSHOT.
He sighs, walks up to the door, and goes inside.


                                                           5
                                                              6

INT. THOR’S APARTMENT BUILDING – DAY
Thor slugs his way up the staircase. As he gets to a
landing, one of the doors opens and ALLISON, a young woman
in her early 30’s, steps out.
                     ALLISON
         Hey Thor.
                   THOR
              (disinterested)
         Many blessings, young Allison.
                   ALLISON
         How was…whatever you do every day? What
         do you do every day?
                   THOR
         I go to the park. And feed ducks.
                    ALLISON
              (pause)
         That’s it?
                   THOR
              (shrugs)
         I like ducks.
Allison smiles.
                   ALLISON
         That’s nice. I gotta go to work. I’ll
         see you around, ok?
Thor nods. Allison goes downstairs, and Thor continues his
journey upward.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT – DAY
Thor enters his apartment. It is very dingy, and very
dirty. The walls are slowly peeling down. The furniture is
simple and functional. Thor’s mighty hammer, Mjolnir, is
sitting upright ingloriously in a corner, collecting
cobwebs and dust.
Thor takes off his gregariously large coat, and hangs it on
a coat-rack. He walks over and opens up a nearby fridge,
and pulls out a can of cheap beer. He frowns at it, and
closes the fridge. Fade to:




                                                              6
                                                              7

INT. VALHALLA - NIGHT
A rousing, boisterous Viking party is taking place, with
dozens upon dozens of Vikings laughing, and eating large
piles of meat, and drinking from large mugs of mead. Thor,
happily in his element, sits at one of the more important
tables, his arm around his wife, Freyja, his other arm
shoving large meat chunks into his mouth. Most of the
people at that table are listening to Tyr tell the exciting
tale of the battle against the giant tentacle monster.
                   TYR
              (obviously very drunk)
          Now, I was nearly helpless, trapped in
         a sea of arms and…slime, and Thor
         bravely leapt into battle, shouting
              (poor Thor impression)
         I SAY THEE NAY, I SAY THEE NAY!
There is some laughter.
                   TYR
         And he starts swinging, swinging like a
         madman!
              (swings arms around in mock
              battle)
         Squid arm over there! Squid arm over
         here! Nonstop flurry of battle, my
         friends! That beast was dead before it
         could sink back to the depths from
         which it came! It was glorious.
He awkwardly drinks some mead, spilling a great deal of it
onto himself. Freyja looks up at Thor.
                   FREYJA
         You were glorious.
Thor smiles.
                   THOR
         I did what had to be done.
                   LOKI
         Is that what you call it?
Thor turns around to see LOKI, his half-brother, the
dastardly god of mischief.
                    THOR
         Loki.


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                   LOKI
         I realize there was a creature that
         required defeat, but did you have to
         destroy half of Asgard in the process?!
                   THOR
         Forgive me, brother, I seem to have
         forgotten. Where were you during the
         battle? You know, you seem to be
         disappearing during a great many
         battles, lately.
                   LOKI
              (getting more angry)
         Are you insinuating that this was my
         doing?! Brother, I am offended!
                    THOR
         Good.
                   LOKI
         Now you listen to me, you overgrown cow
         of a man, if you think you can just-
                   FREYJA
         Loki, please, it’s a celebration!
She hands him a mug of mead.
                   FREYJA
         Relax, have some fun.
                   LOKI
         Don’t patronize me, you fat-
Thor’s hammer thwacks into Loki’s chest, blasting him
across the room in a blaze of electricity. He slams into
the wall. The party goes quiet for a moment. Everyone looks
at Thor.
                   THOR
              (to everybody)
         No one calls Freyja, the wife of Thor,
         ―fat‖! (pause) Except Thor!
Everyone laughs. She punches him in the arm. The party goes
back to normal.
Suddenly, lava erupts volcanically from a spot in the
middle of the room. A few more lava blasts occur, under
tables, under people’s chairs. Several partygoers are


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violently lavaed. A giant, 20-foot-tall man, made up
entirely of lava and rock and flame, slowly ascends from
the ground. Thor stands up, holding his hammer, battle-
ready.
                   FIRE GIANT
         I am the fire giant, Surt! As of this
         moment, the many halls of Asgard are
         under my rule!
Odin, sitting in his throne at the head of the room, is
shocked.
                   ODIN
         Nay! Who are you, fire giant Surt, to
         decide who rules Asgard?! Odin shall
         remain all-father over this place!
                   SURT
         Is this so?
Odin’s chair is blasted with a …blast of lava, destroying
the chair entirely and hurling a lava-encrusted Odin
backwards across the room, to somewhere relatively near
where Loki is.
                   SURT
         Your all-father is defea-
Thor’s hammer smacks Surt in the head. Surt falls and
smashes into 3 or 4 tables behind him. The hammer flies
back towards Thor, who catches it. Freyja pulls out a
sword. Tyr falls out of his chair, very, very drunk.
                    THOR
         Nay!
He and Freyja charge into battle. Other Norse gods also
leap into the fray, because that’s what Norse gods do.
There is a great deal of axe-swinging and battle crying and
―I say thee nay!‖ing.
Surt the fire giant, not one to be taken down easily,
manages to incapacitate all of the gods but Thor. Soon, he
and Thor are locked in a vicious battle of strength and
valor, which only one of them can win. After a couple
minutes or so, Thor manages to pin Surt down on the ground,
hammer to his neck.
                   THOR
         Surrender, vile brute, or face Thor’s


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         wrath!
Surt coughs up some smoke and rock.
                   SURT
         You have defeated me, Thunder God.
         Someday I shall have my revenge.
              (pause)
         Why wait?
Freyja, standing about 20 feet behind Thor, is suddenly
engulfed in hot magma, which latches onto her, solidifies,
and crumbles, leaving nothing behind.
                    THOR
         FREYJA!!
He looks back at Surt, his eyes glowing with both lightning
and rage. Surt is gone. Thor acts like he is about to
scream.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT – DAY
Thor screams, and crushes the beer can in his hand, sending
beer everywhere. He drops the can, and breathes heavily for
a moment, getting his bearings on where he is and what he’s
doing. He looks down, and sighs.
There is some yelling and screaming outside. Thor goes to
the window and looks. The same three mafia guys are picking
on some poor old hobo. He says something about having no
money, to which the mafia men respond with needless
violence. Thor scowls, and closes the shades.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Cut to Thor, asleep in a Laz-E-Boy, snoring loudly,
drooling all over himself. The room is lit solely by the
TV, which seems to be tuned to Animal Planet. The sounds of
violence and shouting are still piping in from outside,
muffled by the walls.
Thor is awoken by a knock at his door. He looks confused,
unused to visitors. He grunts as he slowly gets up, and
shambles over to the door, and opens it. It’s Allison.
                    ALLISON
         Hi Thor.
Thor stares back at her, slowly trying to figure out why
she’s here.



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                   ALLISON
              (weirded out by the staring)
         Listen…you’ve probably noticed the
         mafia guys out in the alley beating and
         shooting people all day and night…
                   THOR
         ―Mafia g-‖ Ah, yes. The Romans. So much
         violence over simple currency. Very
         sad.
                   ALLISON
         Uhh…right. Well, right now they’re
         harassing Mr. Macsimowicz from the
         deli, and he’s a very nice old man, and
         I was hoping you could go do something
         about it.
Thor glances at his hammer. His eyes flicker with light
momentarily.
                   ALLISON
         I’d go out there myself, but you’re
         much bigger than I am, and I thought-
                   THOR
         I am sorry, Allison. I do not do that
         sort of thing anymore. You should call
         the police.
                   ALLISON
         Call the police? The mafia owns the
         police. Can’t you just go talk to them
         or scare them or something.
Thor ponders this over, slowly.
                   THOR
         I suppose. But I will not use force.
                   ALLISON
         I’m not asking you to.
EXT. ALLEY – NIGHT
Mr. Macsimowicz flops over into the ground after being
punched. The two lesser Mafia guys laugh, and the main one
speaks.
                   GANGSTER 1
         That’ll teach you to squelch on Big


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         Vinnie, you old-
                   THOR
         Leave him be.
They turn around to see Thor.
                   GANGSTER 1
         Who the fuck are you?!
                   THOR
         The man has done no wrong. Leave him
         be.
                   GANGSTER 1
         ―Done no wrong‖?! I’ll have you know,
         he happens to have failed to pay his
         protection money for an entire month.
         If that ain’t wrong, I dunno what-
Thor steps forward.
                   THOR
         I don’t want to hurt you.
His eyes flicker blue for a moment.
                   GANGSTER 1
         Hey, I don’t want to hurt me, eith-
Lighting strikes the gangsters’ car. It explodes in flame,
flies up a bit, then smashes into the ground, charred
wreckage that only vaguely resemble an automobile.
                   THOR
         But I will if I have to.
The gangsters back away, and then cheese it. Mr.
Macsimowicz cheeses it, too. Because Thor is very scary. He
goes back inside.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT   BUILDING – NIGHT
Thor walks up the stairs to his apartment. Outside
Allison’s door is a large potted plant. Thor accidentally
knocks it over with his fur coat, sending it tumbling down
the stairs loudly. Thor winces. Allison opens the door.
                   ALLISON
         How did you do that?
Thor looks at her, then the plant, then back at her.



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                                                   13

                   THOR
         My coat, I think. The fur catches on-
                   ALLISON
         Not that. The car. How did you blow up
         that car?
                   THOR
         Car? (pauses) I am the Thunder God. I
         control the thunder and rain. And the
         seasons, I think. Although, those have
         been changing without my assistance for
         a great while now, so maybe I just
         thought I controlled them…
                   ALLISON
         Wait…you’re the Thunder God. You’re not
         just some guy named ―Thor‖, you’re
         actually the Norse God of Thunder. Who
         Thursday is named after.
Thor nods.
                    ALLISON
         Really.
Thor nods.
                   ALLISON
         That’s bullshit. Shouldn’t you be in
         the Hall of Fallen Heroes or something?
                   THOR
         I left. A long time ago.
                   ALLISON
         Why would you?
                   THOR
         I lost someone. And there were too many
         memories there.
He starts to walk upstairs.
                   THOR
         Do not worry about the elderly butcher.
         He is safe.
Allison watches him go.




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                                                              14

INT. THOR’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Cut to Thor in bed, hours later. He’s asleep, but just
barely, tossing and turning violently. He’s definitely
having some sort of nightmare.
INT. ASGARD – NIGHT
                   TYR
         THOR! YOU CANNOT STAND IDLE IN THE
         MIDST OF THIS GREAT BATTLE! WE NEED THE
         MIGHTY MJOLNIR!
A great battle between all the Norse gods and half a dozen
20-foot-tall ice giants is taking place. It’s very loud and
exciting, yet it is mostly in the background. Thor stands
against a wall, holding his hammer, looking completely
unsure of himself. Tyr is with him, battle-damaged but
still rearing to go.
                   THOR
         NAY! I WILL NOT FIGHT!
                    TYR
         WE CANNOT CLAIM VICTORY WITHOUT YOU!
         MANY GODS MAY DIE IF YOU DO NOT
         INTERFERE!
                   THOR
         SOMETIMES THEY DIE WHEN I DO!
Tyr pauses, and takes a step closer.
                   TYR
         Freyja’s death was not your fault, my
         friend.
                   THOR
         Tell her that. You want Mjolnir?
He shoves his hammer into Tyr’s grasp.
                   THOR
         Take it. It is yours. I am done.
He walks away.
                      TYR
         THOR!
Thor walks up to Loki, who is leaning against a wall and
grinning fiendishly. He grabs Loki by the shirt and holds


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him up, as if he’s either about to shout at him or totally
punch his face. Instead, he just lets go and walks away.
Loki laughs wildly.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Thor wakes up with a start, sweating profusely and once
again out of breath. He punches a nearby lamp into
smithereens in frustration and anger. He pauses for a
moment. Lightning strikes outside. Thor gets out of bed.
INT. CTA BUS – NIGHT
Thor sits in the CTA bus, in the same seat, now at night,
looking even surlier than before, holding a loaf of bread.
A little girl, similar to the earlier one, but of a
different nationality, looks over her seat at him. He
snarls at her, and she sits down, frightened.
INT. ALLISON’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Allison lies asleep in bed. There’s a knock at her door.
She ignores it. They knock again. She grumbles, turns on
the light, walks over, and opens the door. The three
gangsters are standing there, holding weapons.
                   GANGSTER 1
         You know a big guy with a beard and a
         fur coat? Smells kinda like an old
         sock?
                   ALLISON
         I, uhh, no, I don’t know anybody like-
                   GANGSTER 1
         Yeah, you’re lying. (motions to other
         gangsters) C’mon.
The enter her apartment, shoving her back. She screams.
EXT. PARK – NIGHT
Thor sits on a park bench, and tosses bread chunks to
ducks. They quack around and eat the bread and what not.
                   LOKI
              (o.s.)
         Salutations, Thor.
Thor doesn’t bother to turn around, and continues feeding
ducks.



                                                             15
                                                   16

                   THOR
         Loki. Don’t you have babies to eat?
Loki steps out of the shadows behind Thor.
                   LOKI
         Thor, really…I’m the god of mischief,
         not evil. I’m not evil,
         just…mischievous.
                   THOR
         What do you want?
                   LOKI
         Your all-seeing father is expressing
         concern that you may be returning to
         your foolhearty battle-ready ways.
                   THOR
              (laughs)
         Obviously, he has been watching me
         close, but not closely enough. Do not
         worry, trickster god, your evil will
         continue unimpeded yet.
                   LOKI
         Good. I mean, I’m not evil.
                   THOR
         But Odin would know that.
              (turns around)
         So why are you really here?
                    LOKI
         I, er-
                   THOR
         The Romans. You’re somehow connected to
         the Romans outside my home.
                   LOKI
         ―Romans‖ is an antiquated term by
         thousands of years, Thor. They’re
         called ―Italians‖ now.
                   THOR
         Why would you ally yourself with them?
         You have no use for currency.
                   LOKI
         My intentions are my own.


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                                                              17

                   THOR
         Of course. You know, I am tempted to
         hurt them simply to spite you-
                   LOKI
         Thor, by Odin’s beard, If you so much
         as-
                   THOR
         As always, your threats mean nothing.
Loki pauses, then pokes Thor in the stomach.
                   LOKI
         You’re not the god you once were, Thor.
He steps back into the shadows and disappears. Thor tosses
the remaining bread (about half a loaf) to the ducks, and
gets up and walks away.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT BUILDING – NIGHT
Thor walks up the stairs, past Allison’s room. There’s a
bloody handprint on the door, but he doesn’t notice.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Thor sits in his chair, watching Animal Planet. On the TV,
monkeys jump around from tree to tree, having a good time.
Thor, bored, turns off the TV. He stands up and stretches.
He glances at the warhammer in the corner. He walks over,
picks it up, and wipes the dust and cobwebs off it. He
swings it once, awkwardly. Again, slightly less awkward. He
spins it around, and tries again. He gets too confident,
and accidentally swacks another lamp off another table.
                   THOR
              (quietly, to himself)
         I am running out of lamps.
There’s a knock at his door. Thor answers it. It’s Allison,
she’s bleeding profusely from the arm. Lighting and thunder
crack outside.
                    ALLISON
         Hi Thor.
She collapses. He catches her, and puts her in his bed.
                   THOR
         You need…we need to…
              (awkwardly, as if he’s never said


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                                                              18

              the word before)
         ―Hos-pit-tal‖. We need to get you
         there—
She coughs.
                   THOR
         Who did this?
                   ALLISON
         Who do you think?
He goes to the window and looks as she continues talking.
                   ALLISON
         They asked where you were. I didn’t
         tell them anything. The knew I was
         lying, but I didn’t-
Outside, the mafia guys toss a carpet full of body into the
trash dumpster, then run to their car and speed away.
                   ALLISON
         One of them had a knife, and-
Thor turns around.
                   THOR
         Where is the hospital?
INT. HOSPITAL – NIGHT
Thor sits in the waiting area, his head down. A DOCTOR
comes out of a door, and walks up to him.
                     THOR
         Is she-
                   DOCTOR
         She should be fine. The cut is deep,
         but nothing life-threatening. She
         should be able to go home in a couple
         of days or so. Is there a phone number
         we can call when she’s released?
                   THOR
         I do not have a phone. They confuse me.
              (pauses)
         I will return here in 2 days to bring
         her home.
He walks away.


                                                              18
                                                              19

                   DOCTOR
         Well, we’re not 100% sure when exactly
         she’ll be--
Thor’s already out the door and gone.
                   DOCTOR
         --and you’re already out the door and
         gone. Ok.
INT. THOR’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Thor kicks the door open. He walks in, grabs his hammer,
and starts smashing everything in sight. The TV, the table,
the chair, the lamp remains, the windows, everything.
Thunder strikes outside, and it starts to rain pretty
heavily. Thor calms down, and surveys the wreckage. Someone
screams outside. Thor walks hurriedly towards his door.
EXT. THOR’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Gangsters 1, 2, and 3 have a woman pinned against the wall.
It’s raining really, really hard.
                   GANGSTER 1
         So, you think you can cheat Big Vinnie
         out of his money, e-
Their car is suddenly struck by lightning. It explodes. The
mafia guys and the women stare at it in shock.
                   GANGSTER 1
         I’m running out of cars.
Thor is standing behind about 20 feet them. His eyes are
glowing. They do not notice. Him or his eyes.
                   THOR
         You have injured an innocent person,
         and killed and injured countless
         others.
They turn around.
                   THOR
         Prepare to face a god’s wrath.
The mafia guys all pull out guns and point them at Thor.
                   GANGSTER 1
         You’re causing us a lot of trouble,
         punk!


                                                              19
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He walks towards them. They open fire. He swings his hammer
around, deflecting all the bullets, and then whumps
Gangster 3 right in the chest. He flies backwards all the
way down the alley, and into the smoldering wreckage of the
car. Gangster 1 tries to stab Thor in the arm when he’s not
looking. The knife bends.
                   GANGSTER 1
         What the hell are you?!
Thor hammers Gangster 2 in the face without looking, and
grabs Gangster 1 by the shirt.
                   THOR
         Where is your master?
                      GANGSTER 1
         W-What?!
                   THOR
         Where is the ―Big Vinnie‖ I hear so
         much about?
                      BIG VINNIE
         I am here.
Big Vinnie is a silhouette in the darkness, standing near
the edge of the alley, next to the exploded, flaming car.
                   GANGSTER 1
         Vinnie! What’re you doing here?! I
         swear to Christ, man, I didn’t tell him
         nothin’!
Big Vinnie holds out his hand, and Gangster 1 bursts into
flames. Thor drops him.
                   BIG VINNIE
         I’m glad to see you’re back to your old
         self, Thor. I have to admit, getting
         you there was much trickier business
         than I was expecting.
                   THOR
         It can’t be.
                   BIG VINNIE
         Do you know how many old people and
         children I had to have killed before we
         thought of injuring your little
         neighbor girlfriend? But hey, revenge


                                                              20
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         is only sweet if it’s a challenge, and,
         by the rock heart of Garrnok, 2 months
         ago, it would not have been a
         challenge.
He steps out of the shadows. He’s wearing a very slick suit
and a fedora. His face seems somehow unhuman. Like a very
realistic rubber mask.
                    THOR
         Surt.
                   SURT
         Did you really think I would allow that
         defeat to go unavenged? Fire giants do
         not forgive, Thor.
Thor holds up his hammer in a battle-ready stance. It
starts to glow a bit.
                   THOR
         You murdered my wife.
                   SURT
         She was asking for it! All warrior-
         goddess and sword-slinging. It’s your
         fault, anyway. If you had just let me
         take over Asgard, she would still be
         one of my mightiest subjects.
Thor’s practically shaking with rage.
                   SURT
         Strike a nerve? Good. I was hoping to-
Thor runs at him and swing the hammer. It hits Surt in the
side of the head. Surt slams through the brick wall next to
him, sending bricks and rubble flying every which way.
Things settle. Thor looks at Surt’s body. There’s a fairly
long moment of nothing, so the audience thinks the fight is
over.
                   THOR
         That is somewhat disappointi-
Lava rushes from the hole Surt was knocked into, blasting
Thor through the entire building behind him. He lands in
the next alley over, covered in lava and solidified rock.
                    THOR
         Ow.


                                                              21
                                                              22

Surt stands up, reaching his full fire giant height and
stature, looking as powerful and evil as ever. Thor’s
hammer flies through the tunnel Thor made in the building
between them and plows into Surt’s stomach, sending him
crashing back into the hole he was just in. Thor runs after
the hammer straight through the building and tackles Surt.
They fight, punching and burning and hammering and lava-ing
and scalding and lightning-ing. Eventually, beaten and
burned and bruised, his large fur coat completely burned
away, Thor manages to pin Surt up against a wall, hand to
neck, hammer ready to totally smash his head. Lightning
strikes the hammer for a long time, slowly filling it with
energy.
                   SURT
         All that preparation, (coughs blood)
         you think I wouldn’t have a back-up
         plan?
Thor lightning-hammers his head, exploding it. Surt’s
remaining body turns to rock.
                     THOR
         Too late.
                   LOKI
              (o.s.)
         Oh, Thor, how could you?
Thor turns around and swacks Loki in the face with the
hammer, sending him 20 feet into a lamppost, which falls
over on top of him.
                   THOR
         AND I HATE YOU, TOO!!
Thor breaths heavily for a few moments, then cools down. It
stops raining. He goes to walk away, and walks smack into
Tyr, his God buddy from the past, looking much more modern.
                     TYR
         Hey Thor.
                   THOR
         Tyr? By the beard of Odin, I have not
         seen you in-
                   TYR
         4,000 years. I know. It’s your fault.
         You don’t have to live in Asgard, but


                                                              22
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         you could at least visit.
                   THOR
         Why are you here?
                   TYR
         (nods over to Loki) Loki’s been
         controlling organized crime rings here
         in Chicago. He set Surt up in his
         position of power with his lame fake
         name. Probably thinks it’s very
         mischievious, the little bastard. I
         gotta bring him in, you wanna help? I’m
         sure your father would-
                   THOR
         No, I—I cannot, there is a girl who
         needs me to pick her up from the
         hospital. But I will visit. Soon. You
         have my word.
                   TYR
         Right. I look forward to it. Farewell.
He and Loki disappear in a blast of light. Thor is left
there.
INT. HOSPITAL – DAY
Allison is sitting in a hospital bed, her arm all bandaged
up, reading a magazine. Thor walks in, looking and feeling
awkward and out of place in the hospital. His new large fur
coat knocks over a tray full of hospital supplies, but he
does notice.
                   THOR
         Hello, Allison.
                      ALLISON
         Hey Thor.
                   THOR
         Can you leave yet?
                   ALLISON
         Tomorrow, Thor. I told you. Tomorrow.
                      THOR
         Oh.
                   ALLISON
         How’s my apartment?


                                                              23
                                                             24

                      THOR
            Building fell down.
                      ALLISON
            What?!
                      THOR
            Too many holes in it. Fell down.
                      ALLISON
            Oh.
                      THOR
            You’re safe, though.
She smiles.
                      ALLISON
            Yeah, I know. I’m safe.
Sirens go off outside. An ambulance leaves the hospital.
Thor watches it out the window.
                      ALLISON
            You should go help.
He nods, and walks out of the room. He pokes his head back
in the room.
                      THOR
            You are safe...
                      ALLISON
            I know, go!
He goes. Outside the window, it starts to rain. There is a
blast of lightning, and Thor flies past, guided by his
hammer. Majestically. Or very goofily. Whichever.
FADE OUT.




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