LOVE NURTURE by wuyunyi


									             LOVE NURTURE

                                       December 09 to February 10
                                           (Quarterly Edition)


                         10 WAYS TO RAISE
                         CHILDREN OF INTEGRITY
                         AND CHARACTER


                                    WOMEN‟S CONFERENCE:
                                    „EVE ARE YOU STILL
                                    THERE?‟ (CHICAGO IL)

                          IMPROVING YOUR
                          HEALTH AND BEAUTY



    Jesus Is the Reason For the Season!

2      Copyright Love Nurture 09

                                                                                                   List of contents:

                                                                           1.      The profile of a Christian Wife—p.4

                                                                           2.      The attributes of love—p6.

From the Editor                                                            3.      Thanksgiving and praise—p7.

It‘s been six years since we first launched Love                           4.      When sorry isn‟t enough—p8.
Nurture Magazine and I feel a sense of de ja vue
coming on And those of you who read the first edi-                         5.     The 10 Commandments—p10.
tion will be pleasantly surprised to find you will too!
                                                                           6.      Merry pages - p.16
Too many times families break up when it could so
easily be avoided. How so, you may ask? By                                 7.      Divorce and it‟s ugly consequences—p18.
addressing those issues overlooked at home and in
our churches.                                                              8.      Sincerely Frank -p20

Basically, we aim to be that shoulder you can cry                          9.      Mr & Mrs Quiz - p 22
on, that friend, to vent your frustrations at and the
friend who will tell you the truth in love.                                10.    Jesus, the reason for the season—p24.

So, do enjoy our magazine and tell us what you                             11.     Taking the initiative for success—p.26.
think, Our details are at the back!
                                                                           12.     Do you know Jesus? - p.31.
                                                                           13.     How to avoid adultery? - p 32

Eruvwu                                                                     14.    7 things you should know about your
Editor/Founder,                                                                   Wife - P. 33.
Love Nurture.
                                                                           15.     Ways to leave an inheritance - p.34

                                                                           16.     Valentine‟s special - p.36

                                                                           17.     Improving your health & beauty - p40

    Disclaimer: Any resemblance to any marriage is purely coinciden-       18.    10 Ways to raise Godly Children - p46
    tal and by no means intentional. This magazine publication is for
    entertainment and information only and is not to be relied upon in     19.    The Marriage Covenant — p.49.
    making decisions requiring the expertise of a professional Love
    Nurture makes no warranty as to the content, accuracy, timeliness
    or completeness of the information or that the information may be      20.    Conflict resolution — p58.
    relied upon for any reason and bears no responsibility for the
    accuracy, content or legality of any linked site or for that of any
    subsequent links. Love Nurture makes no warranty that the web-
                                                                           21.    Women‟s conference ‟09 - Eve are you still
    site service will be uninterrupted or error-free or that any defects          there? - p.62.
    can be corrected.
                                                                           22.    An interview with EJ Obuaya - p67.

                            Int‟l Women‟s conference Chicago IL

                                                                           Improving your health and beauty

3                            Copyright Love Nurture 09                                                

                                                 member of God‘s family, she need never feel
                                                 inferior. God has endowed her with so many
                                                 wonderful attributes that is not seen in the
                                                 average wife:
                                                 What an average wife will do, she refuses to
                                                 What an average wife will say , she refuses
                                                 to say,
                                                 What an average wife will wear, she refuses
                                                 to wear,
                                                 What makes an average wife bitter makes
                                                 her sweet.

                                                 She is thoughtful.

                                                 Her conduct and behaviour is different ; the
                                                 Christian wife is such an asset to her hus-
                                                 band. She never creates any trouble for him;
The Profile Of A Christian Wife                  she is never a distraction to his focus. Never
                                                 an embarrassment to him, never stifles the
I believe the role of a Christian wife within    greatness within him, she multiplies what-
the marital relationship is the choice role.     ever is within him.
She is to be loved, protected and cherished
by her husband in the same way Christ gave       While many wives can spend money, the
himself for the church (Believers). To play      Christian wife makes it. Many wives want
the role effectively the Christian wife has to   money, the Christian wife has and manages
have a certain profile.                          it properly. Many wives enjoy spending
                                                 money, but the Christian wife invests it.

Just like Jesus didn‘t go around saying the      The Christian wife adopts and accommo-
words , ‗I am God!‘ yet when we look at all      dates the changing plans and schedules of
that he taught and claimed there is little       those to whom she‘s assigned.
doubt that he was conscious of being a man
whose identity was God. In the same way a      She notices others,
Christian wife does not need to go around      She contributes,
screaming, ―I am a Christian wife!‖ but must   She cooperates,
be conscious to carry the identity and per-    She is flexible,
sonality of a Christian wife.                  She understands variation of schedules,
                                               She is resourceful and understands the lan-
A Christian wife should be submissive, in the guage of business.
sense that she should be a responder to her She understands the laws of increase and
husband‘s love, protection, abilities and tal- values problem solving.
ents.                                          She is well versed in policies and proce-
A Christian wife is full of wisdom, and with
her wisdom put into action, she will build a   The Christian wife does not make impulsive
successful marriage by meeting her hus-        purchases. She does not wake up with a
band‘s needs in the manner described in        ‘spiritual dream‘ that she is to purchase
Proverbs 31:12, ―She will comfort, encour-     some strange business.
age and do him good as long as there is life
within her.‖                                   Rather she gathers data first, is cautious and
                                               does not make hasty decisions.
A Christian wife belongs to the royal family
and has the greatest heritage possible. As a


She does not suddenly ‗buy‘ a field: ―She
rather considers a field, and then
buys it!‖

Health matters to the Christian woman, it is
her strength! While the average wife wants
to look healthy, the Christian wife wants to
be healthy.

The Christian wife is one in a million, she is
the bible others read!

She completes what she starts , she has the
spirit of a finisher, like her master Jesus, she
cries out, ―it is finished!‖ like Paul she can
say, ―... I have finished my course‖ 2 Timothy

Written by Mrs Rita Dada.

     “ The Christian wife is
     such an asset to her hus-
     band. She never creates
     any trouble for him; she is
     never a distraction to his
     focus. Never an embarrass-
     ment to him...”

Rita is married to Segun, she is a student, employee and
mother of four lovely children. They attend Pneuma Christian
Centre, Croydon, Surrey UK.

5                      Copyright Love Nurture 09     

The Attributes of Love -                        practice this daily on your

spouse and children to transform your marriage and home.

(1 Corinthians13)

 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I
am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all
knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not
love, I am nothing.
    If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,
       but have not love, I gain nothing.
 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is
not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it
keeps no record of wrongs.
    Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
    It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
  Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease;
where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge,
it will pass away.
    For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
 but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a
child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.
When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
  Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face
to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully
  And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of
these is love.

6              Copyright Love Nurture 09               

                                                       that the LORD he is God: it is he that hath made
      Thanksgiving and Praise                          us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and
                                                       the sheep of his pasture. Enter into his gates with
Thanks giving is not just about the holiday and        thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be
turkey. It‘s about taking time to offer praise and     thankful unto him, and bless his name. For the
thanks to God for all he has done, as you cele-        LORD is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his
brate with your loved one‘s.                           truth endureth to all generations."

Oh give                              thanks to the     As we have clearly seen, although our American
Lord for he                          is good and       family have got the idea right we all need to thank
his mercy                            endureth for      God and with a heart that is full of praise and
ever...                              Psalm 107:1.      thankfulness to God.

With                                 thanksgiving
let your                             request be-
come                                 known unto
God - Philippians 4:5-7.

In Nigeria, we regularly have thanksgiving ser-     Written by Eruvwu
vices which are taken very seriously, were the      Obuaya.
people come well dressed and with their baskets
of food and offering ready to give the Lord; and is
similar to how those in the US celebrate it.        Praise, My Soul, the King of Heaven
                                                       Praise, my soul, the King of Heaven;
2 Timothy 3:1 –2 - God hates ingratitude, decide
                                                       To His feet Thy tribute bring!
today to make a sincere effort to be grateful, least   Ransomed, healed, restored, forgiven,
you lose what you already have because of your         Who like me His praise should sing?
refusal to appreciate it or them!                      Praise Him! praise Him!
                                                       Praise the everlasting King!
It‘s good to give thanks because God asks it of
us - Luke 19:40. Also it releases God‘s blessings      Praise Him for His grace and favour,
on you, because praise shows your faith and            To our fathers in distress!
confidence in God and it this that releases the        Praise Him still the same for ever,
blessings.                                             Slow to chide, and swift to bless!
                                                       Praise Him! praise Him!
                                                       Glorious in His faithfulness!
Benefits of thanksgiving:
                                                       Father-like, He tends and spares us;
     It can lift depression;                          Well our feeble frame He knows.
     It release the blessings of God;                 In His hands He gently bears us,
     It helps keep you humble—you don‘t take          Rescues us from all our foes,
      things or people for granted and you give        Praise Him! praise Him!
                                                       Widely as His mercy flows!
      acknowledgement to God as your source;
     It empowers you;                                 Frail as summer's flower we flourish:
     It gives you peace;                              Blows the wind, and it is gone.
     It brings joy;                                   But while mortals rise and perish,
                                                       God endures unchanging on.
I‘ve learnt that thanksgiving is an attitude of the    Praise Him, Praise Him,
heart, don‘t wait to feel like it, just do it!         Praise the high eternal One!

                                              Angels, help us to adore Him;
How, you may ask: when you pray thank God for Ye behold Him face to face:
what he has done, is doing and yet to do and  Sun and moon, bow down before Him;
sing songs and hymns to him.                  Dwellers all in time and space,
                                              Praise Him! praise Him!
Count your blessings name them one by one and Praise with us the God of grace!
it will surprise you what the Lord has done.
                                                       Henry Francis Lyte
Psalm 100 - "Make a joyful noise unto the LORD,
all ye lands. Serve the LORD with gladness:
come before his presence with singing. Know ye

7                Copyright Love Nurture 09                                

                                                an apology is required, sometimes sorry
When Sorry isn‟t enough!                        isn't enough.

                                                Why would sorry not be enough?

                                                You have humiliated your wife (or hus-
                                                band) through your words and actions
                                                more than once.

                                                You have apportioned blame to your wife
                                                having heard from a 3rd party about her
                                                'faults' prior to hearing her side and take
Now let me start from the premise that          action based on what you‘ve heard.
no marriage is perfect!
                                            You have treated her with contempt and
People will try to give the impression that disdain for a period of time and now
they have the perfect marriage, but the     'you've seen the light'.
truth is two imperfect people do not make
one perfect marriage.                       It appears to be insincere - or motivated
                                            by something other than true repentance
In your marriage it is important that you   - let's not pick on any one husband, so I
learn to understand each other‘s differ-    will give the public example of Chris
ences and lay boundaries for what is ac- Brown, the singer.
ceptable behaviour. The saying that, ‗if
you stand for nothing, you fall for every- After beating up his then girlfriend fellow
thing‘ is true even in marriage.

In your marriage you teach your spouse
how to treat you, just by what it is you will    “Learn with your apology
tolerate and what you will not.                  to add the phrase, 'I was
                                                 wrong, would you please
I had not heard of the book by the same          forgive?”
title when I first thought up the topic title,
but in marriage this is a thought that
would have crossed every wife's mind, if
you have been married long enough; and singer Rihanna, he 'congratulates' him-
to be fair some husbands too!                  self with a $300,000 diamond encrusted
                                               pendent with the word 'Oops!' at the end
Why wives and not husbands, well let's         of it. Was this meant to be an apology or
not kid ourselves, husbands generally          a publicity stunt? Either way it is adding
are not in the business of providing           insult to the injury the poor girl suffered!
apologies that are clearly packaged to
look and sound like one, this is generally What would have been appropriate was
the wives remit, so it‘s important they un- him spending that money on worthwhile
derstand the importance of this issue.         causes that fight against domestic vio-
However, for those who do apologise or lence, volunteered some time at one of
find that they are now in a position where these centres, gone for (cont‘d overleaf)

8                Copyright Love Nurture 09                     

counselling regarding his crime, taken
anger management classes, kept a very
low profile and apologised sincerely to
Rihanna every chance he got without try-
ing to get back with her.

Husband's do you get the picture?

When you've apologised do something
special that you know s (he'll) appreciate,
if you're unsure ask her girlfriend or other
woman who will have her best interest at
heart, so you don't put your foot it!

Learn with your apology to add the
phrase, 'I was wrong, would you please
forgive me?‘ Take appropriate steps to
change and to show her you have

Now this is the big one, you have to talk
about why it is you did what you did and
give her answers, being extremely pa-
tient as she tries to get answers from
you, this is not the time for you to be-
come defensive or angry...

It‘s important prior to marriage or in your
marriage to have a positive self image of
yourself and have a respect for yourself
that your spouse will admire and respect.
To have a positive self image you need
to go to God‘s word and see what it says
about you and your situation and pray for
grace as you implement what you have

You can also learn from others what they
have learnt and what they do to improve
themselves. Also have an older woman
as your mentor and/ or someone whose
marriage you admire – That they may
teach the young women ...
(Titus 2:4 KJV)

Written by Eruvwu Obuaya.

9                Copyright Love Nurture 09

Ten Commandments for All the Family (Children,
take note!)
1. Thou shalt have no other gods before me – Nothing and none should take God‘s
place in your life.

2. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image – You should serve only the
God who created heaven and earth.

3. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain – God‘s surname is not
‗Damn!‖ And exclamations of ‗God Almighty!‘ or ‗Jesus Christ!‘ is taking God‘s
name in vain because when you say these things you are not trying to get God‘s
attention but express your exasperation.

4. Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy – If God rested on the seventh day
so can you!

5. Honour thy father and thy mother – You cannot disrespect you parents whether
you‘re young or old and if they don‘t deserve respect just be polite and pray for
God‘s change in them.

6. Thou shalt not kill – Even angry words that you spill out from your mouth can kill
someone‘s spirit, so watch what you say!

7. Thou shalt not commit adultery – The bible says just looking with lust is suffi-

8. Thou shalt not steal – If it isn‘t yours, don‘t take it!

9. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour – White lies, black lies,
they‘re all lies!

10. Thou shalt not covet – Avoid jealousy and be content with what you have, after
all you don‘t know what people went through good or bad to get to where they are

(Explanatory text provided by Eruvwu Obuaya)
Deuteronomy 5:6-21 and in Exodus 20:1-17

10                Copyright Love Nurture 09                 


         A little girl's bright shining eyes with face aglow,
           Says: "Daddy, It's time for church-Let's Go!
    They teach us there of Jesus' love, of how he died for all,
    Upon the cruel cross to save those who on Him will call."
 "Oh, no," said Daddy, "Not today. I've worked hard all week,
 And I must have one day of rest; and I'm going to the creek.
    For there I can relax and rest; and fishing is fine they say.
 So run along; don't bother me, we'll go to church some day."
           Well months and years have passed away,
                but Daddy hears that plea no more;
   "Let's go to Bible school." Those childhood days are over.
         And Daddy's grown old, life's almost through,
   He finds time to go to church, but what does daughter do?
   She says: "Oh Daddy, not today-I stayed up half the night;
  I know you know that church can understand my
  Then Daddy lifts a trembling hand to brush away the tears,
  As again he hears the pleading voice, distinctly through the
     He sees a small girl's shining face upturned, with eyes
        As she says, "It's time for Bible school; please,
                         Daddy, won't you go?"

                              (Author Unknown)

11          Copyright Love Nurture 09     

Ten Commandments for                             God gave women the authority to make im-
                                                 portant decisions too:
husbands -                                       They are workers in and managers of the
Thou shalt not take thy wife for                 home:
                                                 1 Ti 5:14: (Greek: oijkodespotevw "to rule/
granted, but will honour and respect             manage the house")
her as thy equal. (1 Pet 3:7)                    Tit 2:5 (Greek: oikodespotes literally, "house
Thou shalt not take thy wife for granted, but    ruler")
will honour and respect her as thy equal. (1     A wife's judgment can be better than her
Pet 3:7) Husband, are you treating your wife     husbands: Nabal & Abigail: 1 Sam
as an equal and granting her your highest        25:3,17,25,32
honor? If not God says he will not answer        Sleepless in Seattle (movie) Radio commen-
your prayers!                                    tator asks man who was missing his dead
Selfishness is a marriage killer. For many       wife, "Tell me about your wife". "How many
men they think they are better than their wife   hours do you have?" Immediately 3000 sin-
simply because they are men. These men           gle women jammed the radio station
have made a serious judgment error. Hus-         switchboard trying to get his number for a
bands, tell your wife how important and valu-    date! Why Because he was sincerely prais-
able she is to you. Watch for the loving smile   ing his wife! Why did they want to date a
on her face when you do! The Proverbs            complete stranger? Because the one thing
writer said, "An excellent wife, who can find?   they knew was that this man possessed the
For her worth is far above jewels. The heart     rare quality of praising his female compan-
of her husband trusts in her, And he will        ion. If he did it for his former wife…he would
have no lack of gain." Prov 31:10-11 Notice      do it for them!
how the wise husband trusts his wife's judg-
ments and realizes how fortunate he is to      Judith Viorst: "Brevity may be the soul of wit,
have her.                                      but not when someone's saying "I love you.,'
Thy highest allegiance, except God,            When someone's saying "I love you," he al-
shall be to thy wife, not thy relatives        ways ought to give a lot of details: Why does
                                               he love you? How much does he love you?
or friends. (Gen 2:24)                         When and where did he first begin to love
How often does the husband honor his blood you? Favourable comparisons with all other
family over his own wife? Such is a recipe for
disaster! In-law problems are often the result
of a husband who allows his mother and fa-
ther to interfere in his relationship with his
Thou shalt frequently tell thy wife how
important & valuable she is to thee.
(Phil 2:3; Prov 31:10-11)
Selfishness is a marriage killer. For many
men they think they are better than their wife
simply because they are men. These men
have made a serious judgment error. Hus-
bands, tell your wife how important and valu-
able she is to you. Watch for the loving smile
on her face when you do! The Proverbs
writer said, "An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels. The heart
of her husband trusts in her, And he will
have no lack of gain." Prov 31:10-11 Notice
how the wise husband trusts his wife's judg-
ments and realizes how fortunate he is to
have her.
12                Copyright Love Nurture 09                       

women he ever loved are also welcome. And      involved with your children. And then be
even though he insists it would take forever   careful not to "provoke" them to anger, be-
to count the ways in which he loves you, let   cause you have not really taken the time to
him start counting." Redbook.                  understand exactly what happened and why.
Thou shalt hold thy wife's love by the Some fathers alienate their children because
same means that thou won it.                   they hastily dish out too harsh a punishment
(SOS 5:10-16)                                  because they want to get back to their TV
Men pursue their future bride with doting      show or reading the paper. To these hus-
ceaseless attention. Once married the hus-     bands, children are an interruption imposed
band views marriage as a goal accomplished upon him by the wife. Sad indeed.
an on to other of life's challenges. He then     Train up a child in the way he should go,
gives his ceaseless doting attention to the    even when he is old he will not
job, the boys or anything but his wife. She on   depart from it. Prov 22:6
the other hand viewed marriage not as a        Thou shalt remember to do all the lit-
goal met, but as the beginning of a relation- tle things for thy wife when you say
ship. She viewed his doting attention as a     you will. (Mt 5:37)
down payment of attentions to come. He
                                                Jesus instructs all Christians, "let your state-
viewed it as a means to merely get her to
                                               ment be, 'Yes, yes' or 'No, no' and anything
say "I DO".
                                               beyond these is of evil." Mt 5:37. Husbands,
This guy really WON the love of his future
                                               when you say you will do something for your
wife. He looked good because he groomed
                                               wife, have the consideration to do it! Why
his appearance for her. He smelled good,
                                               should she justifiably nag you?
because he regularly bathed and gargled.
                                               Your wife shouldn't have to get you to sign
And he spoke words of "sweetness" to his
                                               some binding oath to get you to make the
love. But give many husbands a few years of
                                               bed, take out the garbage or take her out to
marriage and they let their appearance and
                                               dinner as you agreed.
hygiene slip. But worst of all the sweetness
                                               By doing what you say you will, you earn her
towards their wife is gone. The wife pro-
                                               trust in other areas.
claims to her friends, "Did he ever change
                                               Ever wonder why your wife reacts is a funny
after we said 'I do'!" Guys, if you want the
nights to be hot, you best start warming up
your wife in the day with words of kindness. Keep thine eyes on thy own wife, not
Buy your wife flowers on a regular basis.      thy neighbors. (Prov 5:15-20; Job
Thou shalt actively establish family            31:1; Jer 5:8)
discipline with thy wife's help. (2               The Proverbs writer says it this way, "Drink
Timothy 3:15; Ephesians 6:4; Deuter-              water from your own cistern, And fresh water
                                                  from your own well... Let her breasts satisfy
onomy 6:6-9)                                      you at all times; Be exhilarated always with
Few would argue that the wife is the primary her love." Prov 5:15-20
parent involved in the daily task of interacting The ultimate sacrifice that a woman makes
with the children. But God has placed the         in child bearing is her figure.
father as the head of the household and that
means that you must work hard along side of
your wife in establishing family discipline.
Many fathers leave the majority of the work
of raising the kids up to the wife. In child cus-
tody cases, the mother almost always get                             Continued overleaf
control of the kids, not because she is a bet-
ter parent, but because she is the one who
has been most involved with them. God
commands fathers in Ephesians 6:4 "And,
fathers, do not provoke your children to an-
ger; but bring them up in the discipline and
instruction of the Lord." You must be directly

13                Copyright Love Nurture 09                        

 And the media is filled with 17 year old           wife! He said to her, "What is troubling you,
models who are not yet graduated high               Queen Esther? And what is your request?
 school and never done a hard day‘s work in         Even to half of the kingdom it will be given to
their life!                                         you." Esther 5:3
Job was wise when he said, "I Have made a            Now in modern marriage law, many might
covenant with my eyes; How then could I             wonder why this man is being
gaze at a virgin?"                                   praised for giving his wife the half that al-
 Job 31:1 But we find that for many, the            ready belonged to her. However,
words of Jeremiah apply, "They                       back then this was an incredible offer of
 were well-fed lusty horses, Each one neigh-        generosity! How many wives have to grovel
ing after his neighbor's wife."                     and beg
Jer 5:8                                              for a few dollars while he lavishly spends
Thou shalt make every effort to see                 on himself.
things from thy wife's point of view.
(Gen 21:12)
Abraham is a man whose wife actually called
him "lord". Sarah had an insight on a per-
sonal family matter and Abraham felt that
she was wrong. "But God said to Abraham,               “Keep thine eyes on
"Do not be distressed because of the lad and
your maid; whatever Sarah tells you, listen to         thy own wife, not thy
her" Gen 21:12. Did you catch that? God told
Abraham to obey his wife! He had not taken
the time to see things from her point of view.
Husbands and wives often live and think in
different worlds. A wise husband will "listen"
to his wife before God steps in and forces
him to. Foolish husbands are arrogant
"power-trippers" who know it all, refuse to
listen to their wife and fall flat on their face.
    "Live with her in an understanding way          Ten Commandments for
since she is a woman" 1 Pet 3:7                     Wives
Thou shalt not fail to kiss thy wife                Expect not thy husband to give thee
every morning. (SOS 8:1)                            as many luxuries as thy father hath
Do you know why the "kiss and ride" com-            given thee after many years of hard
muter drop off area's are so popular? Just          labor. (Phil 4:11; Amos 4:1)
ask the wives who drop off their husbands
for work. A recent TV program documented            Thou shalt work hard to build thy
that the wives loved it. Here they had a            house with the husband that you
"legitimate" reason to expect a kiss from           have, not fantasizing about "the one
their husband. Husband, when you leave the          that could have been". (Prov 14:1)
house for work, give her a kiss. When you
                                                    Fond Footsteps. I was visiting friends who
come home, tell her you love her and give
                                                    had just celebrated their 54th wedding anni-
her another kiss.
                                                    versary" The husband entered in his work
Here, in the Song of Solomon, a future wife
                                                    boots, heaving clods of dirt behind him on
speaks of her love and desire for a kiss. "If I
                                                    the spotless kitchen floor. Expecting the wife
found you outdoors, I would kiss you; No one
                                                    to be upset, I said, "His boots certainly do
would despise me, either." Sos 8:1
                                                    bring the dirt in." "Yes," she said with a smile
Thou shalt not be stingy with thy wife              as she got up to get the broom. "But they
when it comes to money. (Esther 5:3)                bring him in too." by Shirley Scott
King Ahasuerus was married to Queen
Esther. Look how generous he was with his


Thou shalt not nag...hit him with thine thou didst before marriage. (Sos 4:9-
frying pan, it is kindlier. (Prov 27:15; 11)
21:19)                                   I have a saying, that a women enters middle
                                     age when she cuts off her long hair very
Thou shalt coddle thy husband and be short.
a warm wife. (1 Cor 7:3-5)              Thou shalt submit to thy husband
The wife should not defraud the husband from thy heart and allow him to be
of his due. We know what the guys never head of DO IT YOURSELF!
grow tired of                               In Gen 18:6 Abraham said to Sarah, "Make
                                            ready quickly, three measures of fine meal,
What due does a man owe his wife?           knead it and make cakes." Can you imagine
                                            Sarah answering, "Do it yourself"? This atti-
 To woo and coddled                        tude would have been out of character for
                                            her because "Sarah obeyed Abraham, call-
 bring flowers                             ing him Lord." 1 Pet 3:6 A wife's big test of
 tell her how pretty she is                faith is if she will submit to her husband
 take her out on romantic dinners          when he is unreasonable and selfish, or
 tell her how much you love her            when she knows she is being wrongs by his
 tell her how much she means to you        attitude. Jesus never asks us to do anything
 You know…all the things you did when      He has not already done Himself! Bible sub-
you were dating!                            jection never implies inferiority but rather
 Do women ever go tired of these things? Thou shalt assure thy husband and others
Its a bottomless pit. Seems silly to a man
                                            that he is the greatest man alive. (Phil 2:3;
 Until he forgets her birthday or VALEN-
                                            Sos 5:9-16)
 Husband says: "I know how much you
and your girl friend Marsha love this stuff
Why don't the two of you buy each other
flowers and go out on a candle lit dinner?
Remember that the frank approval of               ―Thou shalt not nag...hit
thy husband is more to thee than the
side glances of many strangers. (Ezek             him with thine frying
16:32; 2 Pet 2:14).                               pan, it is kindlier...‖
Thou shalt not yell at thy husband but
will be a gentle and quiet spirit. (1 Pet
I have counselled a couple where the wife
natters at the husband and he leaves for an-
other room. She follows him into that room
and continues nattering. He kept going from
room, floor to floor, till finally he hit her. She Author Unknown .
wasn't hurt or bruised, but he should have
just left. But did the wife share in the reason
for getting hit?
Permit no one to assure thee that thou
art having a hard time of it. (1 Pet 5:9)
Husbands: Low self esteem was ranked as
the number one problem among women.
Ask your wife after church today if she feels
you respect and feel she is important!
Thou shall not fail to dress up for thy
husband with an eye to please him, as

Merry Pages
A merry heart                                                  doeth good like a
medicine-Proverbs                                              17:22

God’s Answer

The story is told of a business man who was failing in his business so he called out to God, ‗O God,
something‘s got to give!‘ And God said, ‗Yes, you!‘
- Dr. Nasir K. Siddiki.


Once, when my children where younger, we went to a petrol station.
Observing a motorist, my then 3 year old daughter asked why he wore a helmet? I replied, it was to
protect his head if he were to fall. My daughter then said, ‗If he falls and breaks his head, he will need
cellotape to fix it back!‘

‗No!‘ her then 8 year old brother exclaimed, ‗They‘ll need super glue to stick it back! He concluded in
a matter of fact tone.
- EJ Obuaya.

Wedding day

A father who was going through his wedding album with his 4 year old daughter tried unsuccessfully
to explain what it all meant. After a while, his daughter asked, ‗You mean that was the day mummy
came to work for us?‘
- Unknown.


A minister had a preaching engagement in another state and upon arrival he sent an email to his wife
who was due to join him. However, through some technical error the email was received by the re-
cently widowed wife of an elderly minister with the same name, who had faithfully served the Lord for
years. On receipt of the email, the widow let out a scream and well wishers came running to her,
pointing to the email, it read, ―It‘s very hot down here, can‘t wait till you join me.‖

Magic Lifts

An elderly Chinese man who just arrived in the country for the first time was awed by the technology
of the lifts. He noticed the doors close behind a an old woman and a beautiful young woman appear
when the doors re-opened. Then calling to his son, he ordered, ―Go and bring your mother here,
these doors work miracles!‖
- Rev. William Burland.

16                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                             

The Ticket

Caught for speeding, a minister was forced by a traffic cop to pull over. As the cop was about to write
the ticket, the minister said to him, ―Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.‖ the cop
handed the minister the ticket and said. ―Go thou and sin no more!‖


A Sunday school teacher asked her children just before she dismissed them to the main church, ‗
And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?‖ Annie replied, ―Because people sleeping!‖

Virgin Birth

A teenager who had complained of stomache pains was taken by her mother to the doctor‘s on ex-
amining her the daughter exclaimed, ―Congratulations, You‘re pregnant! Her mother in disbelief said,
―Dr. That‘s impossible she‘s a virgin! ‖ turning to her daughter she confirmed, ―I don‘t even have a

The doctor fell silent and went to his window looking out, after a short silence the mother enquired,
―What is it Dr?‖ To which he replied, ―The first time a star rose in the east, I missed it, I‘ll be damned
if I miss it again this time!‖

No Parking

A minister parked his car in a no parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and
couldn‘t find a space with a meter. So, he put a note under the wind shield wiper which read: ―I have
circled the block ten times. If I don‘t park here, I‘ll be late for my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR
TRESPASSES.‖ When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with his note. ―I
have circled this block for 10 years, if I don‘t give you a ticket, I‘ll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO


Don‘t wait until your married to be thankful, because when you do, you may find womens‘ faults are
many, men have only two, everything they say and everything they do !
— Pastor John Hagee

Doctor‟s orders

A man and wife attended a counselling section with the marriage counsellor as they were having marital prob-
lems. The wife ranted and raved expressing all her grievous, her husband kept silent. When she was done the
counsellor gave her a long passionate kiss and told her husband he recommended this twice a week.

The husband said he would bring her Tuesday‘s and Thursday's.
- Unknown.

17                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                                

Divorce and it‟s ugly consequences
                                            answer when one half of the couple has
                                            committed adultery. Is that really correct?
                                            My answer is no, why, read 1 Corinthians
                                            7:39; Matthew 5:27-31; Malachi 2:16 and
                                            Matthew 19:1-12.

                                            Although the above scriptures may
                                            sound foolish to some people, remember
                                            the things of God are foolishness …
                                            1Corinthians 2:14 and in most cases it is
                                            already entrenched in some couples
                                            mind that when or if adultery occurs the
                                            only result should be to get a divorce.
                                            Although it is a painful situation, one
                                            thing we should also ask, "Is this what
                                            God is asking me to do? That may not be
                                            the option or last resort God's wants you
                                            to take.

                                           Who then suffers during divorce:
                                           - At the infant stage of divorce most cou-
                                           ples or one party looks like they have it
                                           made, that the divorce is going ahead,
                                           but looking back reality sets in. The first
The word divorce is a fearful or ugly word casualty are the children, if any. The psy-
to hear or speak about.                    chological effects on the children that
                                           one of their parent's is no longer living in
For most of us it is an inevitable thing   the house cannot be imagined
that must happen, however, no one
seems to think about the consequences, Some of children can grow up with the
to themselves as couples, the children     effects of the trauma for the rest of their
and members of their extended families lives and become rebellious, which could
and friends.                               lead to other things which we are seeing
                                           today, e.g. education disrupted and their
I see it as being selfish and naive for    social lives becomes negative.
those couples involved in divorce cases.
It would not be fair to conclude that all  Why should this happen? pay close at-
divorce cases should not be taken very     tention. No woman can take the place of
seriously. Any violent man /woman for      a man in the family, that is trying to take
instance, should be advised to be sepa- on the man (husband's) role whereas
rated from his/her spouse and seek help God made you a woman, with your own
before seeking for divorce in other words wifely role. Consequently, no husband
all avenues should have been explored      can take the role of his wife.
before seeking for divorce.

When is divorce inevitable? Some may

18              Copyright Love Nurture 09                  

 I believe God has given us, men and          From the aforementioned, does this
women their specific role towards their       mean that couples should commit adul-
children and once that role is missing in     tery in the hope that an apology will
the home there are always problems.           make it alright? No!

- Another consequence is if the marriage      All I am saying is that some couples of-
was God ordained, as he said in Gene-         ten take that option (divorce) when such
sis, "What God has joined together let no     an ugly situation occurs too quickly. They
man put asunder." In this case the cou-       do not take ample time to reflect before
ple concerned might be miserable for the      taking this decision.
rest of their lives as they have refused to
obey God's commandment concerning             Except in a situation where there is a
marriage. Generally, the couple are           continuous affair in which case, it will be
never able to remarry or stay in a stable     wise to terminate the relationship.
relationship for the rest of their lives.
                                         For the offended party, both of you must
- It leads to the couple creating enmity sit down and have an in depth discussion
between family members and friends etc. on what led to it, how the offender can
Each couple tends to speak evil of the   begin to make amends and what you can
other to their loved ones and the reper- do to help. Although this will not be an
cussions bring hatred, having far reach- easy journey, you have to have an open
ing effects.                             heart of forgiveness and Godly love to-
                                         wards this partner and appreciate their
                                         efforts. You will need to seek God‘s help
    ―Some of the children can            to have grace to cope and to be gracious
                                         and merciful.
     grow up with the effects of
     trauma for the rest of their             To the offender you have to be very pa-
     lives and become rebel-                  tient and humble, you broke the cove-
                                              nant so you have to face the conse-
     lious, which could lead to               quence with grace.
     other things which we are
     seeing today...‖

                                              Austin is our editor‘s husband, he is a travel,
                                              management and lettings agent and together they
                                              attend Pneuma Christian Centre, Croydon and have
                                              four children.

19              Copyright Love Nurture 09                         

                                                          mother). If we have to blur the roles because the hus-
                                                          band is unable to provide for his household alone on
                                                          his income then he has to give more assistance at

                                                          It‘s only fair as she is helping you bring home a large
                                                          chunk of the ‗bacon‘ you can fry it!

                                                          It is unacceptable that husband whose wives work full
                                                          time just as they do, come home expecting their
                                                          ‗Mrs‘ ,Madam‘ or the ‗Wife‘ to cook, clean, take care of
                                                          the children and be lover at night? As American‘s
                                                          would say, ‗You tripping!‘ or as the British would say,
                                                          ‘You must be joking!‘

                                                          The concept of ‗help meet‘ as God ordained it has
                                                          been so twisted that wives now have to take on a lot
                                                          more than what God originally planned and this is not
                                                          right. Wives are meant to be a help to their husbands in
                                                          a way that is sufficient to provide the right kind of assis-

                                                            “The concept of „help meet‟ as
                                                            God ordained it has been so
                                                            twisted that wives now have
                                                            to take on a lot more than
                                                            what God originally
          Sincerely Frank
 Husbands and Wives - Blurring
          the roles.                                    tance for him. She is not there to take over her hus-
                                                        band‘s role or to be laden with all of the responsibilities
When I was a little girl it was common to see dad go to of family life so that he can ‗chill out‘ while she sol-
work to bring home the ‗bacon‘ and mum‘s role was to dier's on.
fry it, so to speak.
                                                        By now we‘ve all heard the results of the survey that
I also heard a lot of times growing up, the man         estimates the worth of a wife who stays home, cooking,
(husband) is the bread winner and the woman (wife) is cleaning, mending, babysitting etc at £25k or $40k a
the homemaker. However, when the wife also goes out year.
to work is she now a breadwinner? Or, if the husband
stays home and looks after the children, has he now      If you think you wife who is at home doing all this is
become the homemaker?                                   taking the easy option, I defy you to help her find a job
                                                        she loves and thrives at and you take over her role for
Not according to the bible, ‗The LORD God said, It is   a year. You‘ll be begging her to stay at home in no
not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper  time at all. One, because she is programmed to cope
suitable for him.‘ (Genesis 2:18, NIV).                 better in the wife and mum role than you are. Two,
                                                        because her so called, ‗easy job‘ is not so easy when
So, why is it some husbands make their wives work       you do it, because in reality it‘s never ending.
around the clock while they still have time for their
friends and pastimes while their wives falls into bed     A loving husband should show consideration for his
exhausted every night at some unholy hour?                hardworking wife and learn to ‘pitch‘ in and get the chil-
                                                          dren to also assist. Don‘t let your wife wait until
It‘s alarming the number of wives I see who appear to     Mother‘s Day before she is due a break or any appre-
hold down two jobs (full time employment; wife and        ciation for her endeavours!

20                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                                    

See something else the bible says, ‗But if anyone does
not provide for his own, and especially for those of his
household, he has denied the faith and is worse than
an unbeliever ‘ - some translations say, infidel -
(1 Timothy 5:8 NASB). You, as a husband, provide
money, security, love and affection amongst other
things in your bid to be obedient to God‘s word.

A husband should understand that his wife is not natu-
rally made to take on the stress and strains associated
with the rigours of employment work as he is, but con-
ditions have made it sometimes a necessity. Realising
it and appreciating her efforts and doing your best to
make life easier will earn you her undying love and

Also, husbands need to understand it‘s not how much
harder you work, but how much smarter you work.
Look for opportunities to build your income prayerfully,
research businesses or money making opportunities
and be prayerfully seeking God‘s direction, which wife
wouldn‘t submit to a husband like this?

Don‘t be fearful and unbelieving, step out and trust

The bible also tell us about the virtuous woman and her
attributes, a godly woman or wife would do well to fol-
low in her steps.

A virtuous woman wakes up early to look after her
household, she‘s not lazy or bone idle.

She looks for profitable ventures to help provide for her

She is a wise and savvy business woman and her hus-
band has every confidence in her.

Her husband is respected because of how she carries

Such a wife is priceless. Let this also be your goal from
today as a godly wife and woman.

Read Proverbs 31 today as it‘s a guideline for hus-
bands and wives in clarifying the roles.

A word of advice to husbands, a woman is gifted at
finding viable businesses so don‘t put her down and
dismiss her as this will be contrary to her natural and
godly inclination as we‘ve seen in Proverbs 31; and
would be a terrible and costly mistake and your part.

As the saying goes, ‗ A word is enough to the wise.‘

Take care and be wise!

Written by Eruvwu Obuaya.

21                    Copyright Love Nurture 09   

Mr & Mrs Quiz
How romantic, considerate and sensitive are you?
(Find out how well you know your spouse)
1.   You‘ve been invited to a wedding with your spouse, do you:

A)   Sit close holding hands, fondly remembering your wedding day?
B)   Fight with junior throughout the ceremony as you scowl at your unhelpful partner?
C)   Fall asleep?
D)   Chat happily away with other guests and completely ignore your spouse, after all s(he) busy watching
     the children?
E)   Not go. After all you‘re too busy watching the game or you completely forgot about the invitation?

2.   You‘re in the mood for love:

A)   Do you consider your spouse and try to get them in the mood?
B)   Expect them to be ready when you are?
C)   Get the love make over and done with in 5 minutes (who needs fore play?)
D)   Know what they like and seek to please them?
E)   Become angry because your spouse is uninterested?

3.   Your home needs cleaning, the children need attention and the shopping hasn‘t been done, do you:

A)   Leave it for the spouse, after all (he) is used to it and can do everything?
B)   Offer to help?
C)   Demand your conjugal rights, you‘re more important?
D)   Get the children ready and take them shopping?
E)   Make the children clean up while you channel surf?

4.   Is your idea of romance:

A)   To wine and dine your spouse?
B)   To be spontaneous — you‘re always doing new things to impress you‘re spouse?
C)   To have a lie in all day?
D)   To come home every evening, then keep hold of the remote control?
E)   Seeking to please your spouse?

5.   You have a argument with your spouse:

A)   Do you sulk for a week and wait for an apology?
B)   Try to make amends?
C)   Use sex as a weapon against your spouse?
D)   Resolve it amicably before the day ends?
E)   Remind them of past grievances?

6.   The children have been badly behaved:

A)   Do you wait for your spouse to say something?
B)   Hope that your spouse will do something?
C)   Dismiss it as childish pranks?
D)   Discipline them accordingly?
E)   Scream and shout uncontrollably?

7.   You spouse has gained some weight:

A)   Do you encourage them to lose weight and shape up?
B)   Do you insult them about it every chance you get?
C)   Do you ignore it ?

22                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                               

D)    Do you secretly loathe them?
E)    Do you tell your friends and family how disappointed you are?

8.    Your sister comes over and she and your wife don’t get along:

A)    Do you nip it in the bud by taking the offending party in hand?
B)    Hope they sort it out so say nothing?
C)    Sit in front of the telling and ignore the situation?
D)    Take sides with your sister , after all ;blood is thinker than water?
E)    Take sides with your wife, ‘cos if you don’t you aren’t getting any’?

9.    Both you and your wife go to work, when you get back:

A)    Demand, ‘Where is my food woman!’?
B)    Go to the kitchen and get just your own supper?
C)    Help her with sorting out some chores as she gets dinner?
D)    Join her in the kitchen and help prepare the meal?
E)    Sit in front of the tele and hope she will notice how tired and hungry you are and bring you your dinner
      and massage your toes?

10.   It’s Sunday morning and the whole family needs to prepare for church:

A)    Do you lie in bed while your wife and children prepare?
B)    Get up and help your wife get junior ready?
C)    Lie in bed calling out for your breakfast?
D)    Expect everyone to be on time despite no help from you at all?
E)    Argue about who is more tired and justify why you alone deserve a lie in and not your spouse?

11.   Your family come over to visit:

A)    Throw the ground rules you and your spouse discussed out the window and say nothing about that to
      your ‘loving family’?
B)     Chat about the good old days day and night and ignore your spouse and children, you always have them
C)    And you have not consulted with your spouse, you just assume that it’s convenient?
D)    There is a falling out between your spouse and a relative and you, ‘bury your head in the sand’?
E)    Ensure everyone gets on and that your spouse is treated with respect?

12.    Your spouse complains about a certain behaviour that is affecting your marriage:

A)    Do you quickly point out their own faults?
B)    Listen and do nothing?
C)    Try to make amends starting with a sincere apology?
D)    Quarrel and storm out of the house to return late at night?
E)    Become moody and sulk for as long as it takes to break your spouse and get them to apologise to you for
      Having the ‘audacity’ to try and correct you?

13.    Your spouse is a budding entrepreneur, do you:

A)    Encourage them as you have faith in them?
B)    Laugh them to scorn?
C)    Quarrel about them wanting to start a business without your permission?
D)    Secretly resent there boldness and / or success?
E)    Show no interest whatsoever?

23                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                                   


I remember Christmas growing up, the aroma of turkey, potatoes, gravy, rice stew and
chicken. The taste of mince pies, Christmas pudding and lots of chocolate sweets and fruit
punch, the huge Christmas tree and the presents underneath, it was heavenly!

Unfortunately, with that memory comes the need to overindulge and forget the real reason
for Christmas even now as adults.

This is not to say you should do away with all the trimmings of Christmas as it adds to the
excitement and helps to make the occasion even more memorable. However, remind your-
self and your children the true reason for this wonderful season of Christmas, which is Je-

John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever
believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" (NIV). It's God's precious gift to you
and me that has given us the foundation for Christmas. God gave the most precious gift of
all and in addition he gives good gifts to those who ask him Matthew 7:11.

So, when you're buying your gifts, receiving gifts and eating all those delicious things you
enjoy remember that it was God's gift to you of Jesus, that has made this all possible. Be
thankful for all you have and all that you have received and remember those less fortunate
and do your bit to assist - it doesn't have to cost an ‗arm and a leg‘, just a little bit of effort is
required here.

Go to church and enjoy the fellowship with other believers and learn more of God's love.
May you have a great Christmas, full of excitement, love, hope and forgiveness. And re-
member, Jesus is the reason for this season.

24                 Copyright Love Nurture 09                            

Tips for Christmas:

1.   Have a budget,

2.   Keep to your budget,

3.   Buy things you need not what you want,

4.   Don‘t compete with anyone, spend only what you can afford;

5.   Don‘t buy on credit, make sure you can afford before you buy,

6.   Consider promissory notes as presents—you buy presents for your family after
     Christmas in the sales, however, on the day you wrap up an empty box to keep the
     fun and excitement.

7.   Cook your food from scratch rather than buying more pricey processed ready meal,
     which you may need to buy more of to go around.

8.   Find fun yet inexpensive ways to celebrate Christmas.

9.   If cooking for friends and family, spread the cost with them and don‘t try and take it all
     on yourself.

     “I remember Christmas growing up,
     the aroma of turkey, potatoes,
     gravy, rice stew and chicken...”

25               Copyright Love Nurture 09                        

Taking the initiative for success:                    that business is my toy mentality," she said. "An
                                                      engineer's mentality is to make something last, to
―We've printed a phone.'' - Randice-Lisa Altschul     make it durable. A toy's life span is about an
                                                      hour, then the kid throws it away. You get it, you
In November of 1999 Randice-Lisa "Randi" Alt-         play with it and -- boom -- it's gone." - New York
schul was issued a series of patents for the          Times
world's first disposable cell phone. Trademarked      "I'm going cheap and dumb," she told The Regis-
the Phone-Card-Phone®, the device is the thick-       ter, revealing: "In monetary terms, I want to be
ness of three credit cards and made from recy-        the next Bill Gates." - The Register
cled paper products. This is a real cell phone
(outgoing messages only) with 60 minutes of call-       Randi Altschul's background is in toys and
ing time and a hands free attachment. You can           games. Her first invention was the Miami Vice
add more minutes or throw the device away after         Game, a cops against cocaine dealers game
your calling time is used up. However, with the         named after the "Miami Vice" television series.
planned additional magnetic strip the cell phone        Altschul also invented the famous Barbie's 30th
would double as a credit card, swipe able for pur-      Birthday Game, a wearable stuffed toy that al-
chases with free airtime credits as a bonus. The        lowed a child to make the toy give hugs and an
retail price of the invention should average twenty     interesting breakfast cereal. The cereal comes in
dollars, with a two or three dollar rebate for re-      the shape of a monster and dissolves into mush
turning the phone instead of trashing it.               with milk. Altschul has invested much of her past
Altschul thought up the invention after being           profits into bringing the new STTTM products into
tempted to toss her cell phone out of her car in        fruition.
frustration over a bad connection. She realized         Lee Volte was the senior vice president of re-
cell phones were too expensive to lose or throw
                                                        search and development at Tyco, the toy making
away. After clearing the idea with her patent law-
yer and making sure no one else had already             company, before joining up with Randi Altschul
invented a disposable cell phone, Randi Altschul        and Dieceland Technologies.
together with engineer Lee Volte, patented both         Altschul and Volte have also created a paper lap-
the disposable cell phone and the super thin            top computer, which will sell for twenty dollars
technology (STTTM) needed for the Phone-Card-
                                                        and serve as an internet access device. The
Phone and other intended products.
                                                        STTTM technology has opened up the potential
The 2" by 3" cell phone will be manufactured by         for creating countless new electronic products
Altschul's Cliffside Park, New Jersey company,          and countless cheaper versions of pre-existing
Dieceland Technologies. The entire phone body, products. If STTTM is all that it seems to be, this
touch pad and circuit board will be made of paper technology should be considered a milestone in
substrate. The paper-thin cell phone uses an            electronic innovation.
elongated flexible circuit which will be one piece
with the body of the phone, part of the patented
STTTM technology. The ultra thin circuitry is
made by applying metallic conductive inks to pa-
"The circuit itself becomes the body of the unit,"
Ms. Altschul said. "And it becomes its own built-in
tamper-proof system because as soon as you cut
it open, you break the circuits and the phone
goes dead." - New York Times
The toy designer with no prior experience in elec-
tronics said she developed the phone by sur-
rounding herself with experts who shared her
''conceive-it, believe-it, achieve-it'' attitude. - USA
"The greatest asset I have over everyone else in

26                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                             

                                                  on steamships and in factories around the
Elijah McCoy (1843-1929) was a Black in-          world.
ventor who was awarded over 57 patents.           He eventually set up the Elijah McCoy Manu-
The son of run-away slaves from Kentucky,         facturing Company in Detroit, Michigan to
he was born in Canada and lived there as a        develop and sell his inventions. The continu-
youth.                                            ous hum of so many of the factories of today
                                                  are due in most part to a self-taught me-
As a boy, the young Elijah was fascinated         chanical engineer, son of fugitive slaves who
with machines and tools, learning by watch-       had to leave the U.S. in order to be free.
ing and constantly asking questions. He
came to the United States after the Civil War
and settled near Ypsilanti, Michigan, where
he worked in a machine shop, further in-
creasing his mechanical knowledge and

During this period, steam power was rapidly
being harnessed as a prime industrial power
source. It was the era of the machine age, a
period from about 1865 to the early l900's,
where the spirit of invention was at its high-
est in history. Many of the inventions of the
day involved numerous moving parts requir-
ing lubrication. with all the ingenious devices
invented, no one had yet solved the problem
of getting oil to moving parts without first
having to shut the machinery down, espe-
cially railroad engines. In 1870, McCoy         Taken from online resource of successful
started working on the problem.                 investors.

In 1873, he developed a small, oil-filled con-    What do these people have that you seemly
tainer with an adjustable stop-cock that was      lack?
capable of automatically oiling moving parts
while machinery was still in motion. No           What is keeping you from success?
longer did railroad engines have to stop
                                                  Proverbs 22:29 says:
every few miles while a work-man went
around with an oil can oiling all of the parts.   ―Seest thou a man diligent in his business?
No longer did factory machinery have to be        he shall stand before kings; he shall not
shut down for similar maintenance. McCoy's        stand before mean men‖ (KJV)
invention literally revolutionized the railroad
industry as well as continuously running fac-     ―Do you see a man skilled in his work? He
tory machinery. His invention was so reliable     will stand before kings; He will not stand be-
that it prompted buyers of his device to ask,     fore obscure men‖ (NASB)
"Is this the real McCoy?", recognizing that
McCoy's competitors were trying unsuccess-
fully to duplicate his product. His devices
were used for years on both stationary and
loco-motive machinery in the West, espe-
cially the great railway locomotives,
27                Copyright Love Nurture 09                        

About Love Nurture

Love nurture is an organisation /ministry which was started in October 2003 around the
time of Eruvwu’s 10th wedding anniversary.

It came about as a result of a need to see marriages stronger and fulfilling God’s purpose,
“I believe every marriage is a ministry and God has a plan for each one. When the inspira-
tion first came to me to start a ministry to marriages, I was riding the bus in London and
didn’t feel I was the best person for this role , but I soon learnt to recognise God’s infinite
wisdom and understood that if he has called me, he also will equip me” - 1 Corinthians

Love Nurture’s foundational scripture is Ephesians 5 and it’s from this premise strong mar-
riages and families are built and established.

It started with the Love Nurture magazine, filled with fun packed articles for all the family
which aims to teach couples and children God’s will for their family. The magazine comes
quarterly as a web link upon payment and can be saved to your desk top or printed.

We host regular functions which gives couples a chance to come and have an evening of
romance, fun and entertainment in a setting to match. Obviously our functions are formal
occasions with good food, company and lots of lively and wholly beneficial discussions and
everyone who has been has been blessed and encouraged by it. Check the news page on
the website for function updates and how to receive your invitation

Now, our investment arm (Love Nurture Investments—LNI) which is based on the founda-
tion of Proverbs 13:22 - “A good man leaves an inheritance for his children's children...‖
has been launched and providing an excellent business opportunity that is ‗turn key‘ for the
savvy entrepreneur. This means you have the potential available to you to start creating a
residual income for your family immediately.

You can have a stake in Love Nurture today, just go to the Love Nurture website for details.

My dad (Rev. Abraham Usikaro) once told me, ―When opportunity and preparation meet, it
equals success‖ I have often thought of that statement in my struggle to create wealth and
have been blessed and encouraged to this point. If you too have been preparing yourself for
success, this is an opportunity for you to succeed, just visit the website to get started.

28                Copyright Love Nurture 09                        

Comments, Questions or Testimonies.
If you have helpful comments, questions or testimonies we‘ll love to hear from you.

Visit Eruvwu‘s blog to post there and your comments, questions or testimony may be fea-
tured in future editions of the magazine.

29               Copyright Love Nurture 09                     


The next edition of the Love Nurture maga-
zine will be available to purchase on the 1st
of March 2010.

Look out for details of the next Love Nurture
function, just visit the news page on our web-
site for details.

Sign up for our free newsletter packed with
information and more tips for building your
marriage and family, visit our home page to
submit your details today.

30       Copyright Love Nurture 09

                            Do you know Jesus?

Is he your Lord and personal saviour?
Without him you are hopefully lost,
No matter how good you are, you aren’t good enough!
Come to him just as you are.
He will enable you to live for him.
God is waiting to receive you back to him, like the prodigal son,
If not, the devil will have you in.

Now, who shall it be?

God who loves you—John 3:16—and wants you saved or the devil who hates you
and wants you damned—Romans 3:23 and Revelations 20:14-15?

Please read these scriptural references and ask Jesus Christ into your heart as your
saviour, God to be your father and the Holy Spirit to help you to become more
Christ like.

What to do now:

Find a bible believing church, this is one that believes and preaches the whole word
of God:
    Salvation— through Jesus death and resurrection;

    Holy Spirit Baptism—with the evidence of speaking in tongues;

    Baptism by immersion—water baptism;

    Deliverance from sin—Sanctification: where you are no longer bound by
     sin’s power (continuing in iniquity).

More scriptures:
Romans 3:24 & 6:8/23; 1 Thessalonians 4:11; 2 Timothy 2:19 and Hebrews 11 and
Acts 2.

Get a bible and read it everyday for yourself.

31              Copyright Love Nurture 09                 

How to avoid adultery - quaintances and /or friends set boundaries of
                        behaviour for both of you as the bible says: avoid
                        all appearance of evil— 1Thessalonians 5:22.
6 things you need to
know!                   Guard your heart and mind
                                                      - What is in your heart? What things do you lis-
― But I say to you, anyone who stares at a woman      ten to or watch? As a man thinketh in his heart,
with lust for her has already committed adultery      so is he— Proverbs 23:7. By now you‘ve lived
with her in his heart‖ - Matthew 5:28 (New inter-     long enough to know that your thoughts influ-
national version –NIV)                                ences your actions and if you have had bad
                                                      thoughts they lead to bad or sinful actions.
"You shall not commit adultery‖ - Exodus 20:15
(NIV).                                                Guard your heart with all diligence the bible
                                                      says—Proverbs 4:3, this means some active in-
Watch what you wear -                        Your     volvement on your part.
beauty should not come from outward adornment,
such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jew-     Mind what you say and how
ellery and fine clothes.4Instead, it should be that
of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle   you say it - avoid words that lead to lust
and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's    and compromising situations especially with the
sight. This means that the emphasis in your ap-       opposite sex. This follows on from the previous,
pearance should be on your heart which reveals        guarding your heart and mind through Christ Je-
your motives.                                         sus.

It‘s not uncommon to see some women wear re-
vealing clothes because they seek male admira- Resist temptation - The bible does
tion or even seek to entice. However, a God fear- admonish you to resist temptation and states if
ing women would keep her busts covered and          your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out — Mark
her hemline at a descent length.                    9:47. This means to resist every circumstance or
                                                    situation that leads to compromising situations.
Also, some men are known to dress inappropri-       How? I hear you ask, the bible says to submit
ately, by wearing clothes that leave very little to yourself to God and resist the devil and he will
the imagination.                                    flee from you.

The motive for inappropriate clothing is always       The key here as with anything else is obedience
clear, which is to seek admiration or arouse mem-     to God‘s promptings and leadings.
bers of the opposite sex. Unfortunately, you don‘t
always get the attention you desire and this is not
the way to get wife or husband material, if you‘re    Follow your instincts - Women
searching. If you‘re already married dress seduc-     know instinctively when a man‘s intentions are
tively for your spouse at home, in the privacy of     less than honourable and failure to follow you gut
your bedroom.                                         instincts can lead you into trouble. The holy spirit
                                                      is your teacher, John 14:26 and you have the
                                                      mind of Christ - 1 Corinthians 2:16.
Beware of compromising
situations - I don‘t know about you, but                  “Unfortunately, you don’t
don‘t you hate it when you watch a movie and the
woman is sobbing and the man who should be
                                                          always get the attention
comforting her, who is not her husband, I hasten          you desire and this is not
to add turns it into a passionate kiss—if that were
me a bloody nose would be in order, as it is to-          the way to get wife or
tally inappropriate.                                      husband material.”
Now in real life, if you are in distress what you‘d
be looking for is a sympathetic ear or a shoulder
                                                    Eruvwu Obuaya.
to cry on or just have someone there saying noth-
ing, but silently supportive. If you have male ac-

32                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                              

7 things you should know about your Spouse!

1.   S (he) needs your respect.

2.   You should know their strengths and weaknesses.

3.   You should know their likes and dislikes.

4.   They values your loyalty - do not undermine them.

5.   They need your respect.

6.   They can become a formidable foe, if crossed.

7.   They are or should be your biggest support system.

Eruvwu Obuaya.

33               Copyright Love Nurture 09      

WAYS TO LEAVE AN                                       children‘s destiny.

INHERITANCE TO YOUR                                    In his book, ‗Kingdom Principles of Financial In-
                                                       crease‘ Dr. Nasir Siddiki he says ‗don‘t pray for
CHILDREN‟S CHILDREN                                    things, pray for seed and ask God for wisdom on
                                                       how to sow it. You pick the harvest, God picks the
(Introducing Love Nurture Investments)
The bible says, ―A good man leaveth an inheri-         However, for those who are ready and willing to
tance to his children's children: and the wealth of    build a residual income just in time for Christmas
the sinner is laid up for the just‖ Proverbs 13: 22.   and beyond then consider becoming an affiliate
                                                       promoting Anchored Assurance and Love
Are you content with your income?                      Nurture Magazine to friends, family, colleagues
Do you want a residual income?                         and even customers for a large percentage of the
Do you have too much month left after your sal-        Price (60%).
ary has run out?
Can you provide for your needs as well as that of      Both Anchored Assurance and Love Nurture are
your children?                                         available now in digital form and can be
Are you ready to take charge of your financial         downloaded immediately following payment
destiny?                                               _secured online) so you never have to worry
                                                       about postage and packaging.
Then, this page and resources is for you!
                                                    You decide if you want to sell a few copies or
                                                    hundreds, thousands or millions just go to Click
Let me tell you if you don‘t know already, your
                                                    Bank market place, select: fun & entertainment
salary alone will not bring you the financial free-
                                                    category, keyword Anchored Assurance and cre-
dom you and your family need. However, this fact
                                                    ate your HopLink (this will also apply for Love
should not defeat you, what will defeat you is
                                                    Nurture). Once this is done you have a link that
your limited thinking - Proverbs 23:7.
                                                    will trail all your sales back to you when used.
If you want to succeed and leave your children an Here are some tips to help your market effectively
heritage of success you have to drop your nega-
tive thinking, if you are that way inclined.
                                                            Post your HopLink in search engine ads,
                                                             on fun & entertainment blogs (if your not
A little test for you, when you‘re presented with an
                                                             signed in to a blog it‘s free and easy and a
opportunity that requires some expenditure on
                                                             great way to network with like minded peo-
your part, do you:
                                                             ple, but a word of advice, join in the discus-
       Think this is expensive, I can‘t do it?
                                                             sions a few times first, don‘t just sign up
       This is a challenge, but I am determine to           and start ‗hawking‘ as it puts people off you
        overcome it?                                         and your product!
       This is too hard, I want something easier?          Also join an e book forum of the same
                                                             genre and write a review for novel lovers,
It‘s a fact, that when you think I can‘t, your mind          then at the bottom of your review place
closes to all the possibilities you could have had           your HopLink.
to get you to your desired destination.                     The more blogs and forums you join and
                                                             reviews you write adding your HopLink the
Learn to think of possibilities and never say, ―I            more potential you‘ll have to sell and more
can‘t or never!‖                                             money potentially you‘ll make in addition to
                                                             your monthly salary and the great thing is
Practice a ‗can do‘ attitude from today!
                                                             you get more pay days!
                                                            Visit the affiliate help section at Click Bank
Your children are not blind they can see a lot
                                                             to find out more about how to market to a
more than you tell them and a dad and mum who
                                                             niche (A special area of demand for a
are closed minded will be closing the door to their
                                                             product or service)
children financial future unless they learn to act in
faith themselves.                                     To get started click here
If you have not done so read Rich Dad, Poor
Dad, by Robert Kiyosaki to help give you an in-
sight it to how mindsets affect yours and your

34                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                              

35   Copyright Love Nurture 09

Valentine‟s Special                                     Wikipedia definition:
The origin‟s of Valentine‟s                                        Day or Saint Valen-
                                                                   tine's Day is
                                                                          a holiday celebrated
What is means to you?                                                     on February 14 by many people
If your spouse does not do                                                throughout the world. In the
something special on the                                                  English-speaking countries, it is
day, does that mean s (he)                                                the traditional day on which lov-
doesn‘t love and appreciate                                               ers express their love for each
you and all you‘ve done? I                                                other by sending Valentine's
had that issue with my hus-                                               cards, presenting flowers, or
band for a while in our mar-                                              offering confectionery. The holi-
riage and would be miser-                                                 day is named after two among
able sometimes around Val-                                                the numerous Early Chris-
entine‘s Day as friend‘s and                                              tian martyrs named Valentine.
colleague‘s all seem to have                                              The day became associated
had a wonderful time of ro-                                               with romantic love in the circle
mance, fun and presents                                                   of Geoffrey Chaucer in the High
while my day was not so                                                   Middle Ages, when the tradition
special!                                                                  of courtly love flourished.

That was until I got the reve-
                                                                           The day is most closely associ-
lation that the day was not what was special, but
                                                        ated with the mutual exchange of love notes in
the relationship. It was my husband who pointed
                                                        the form of "valentines". Modern Valentine sym-
this out (quite a few times actually) until I finally
                                                        bols include the heart-shaped outline, doves, and
got it!
                                                        the figure of the winged Cupid. Since the 19th
                                                        century, handwritten notes have largely given
It‘s great to go out and celebrate your love and
                                                        way to mass-produced greeting cards.[1] The
buy gifts of course! However, if it‘s something that
                                                        sending of Valentines was a fashion in nineteenth
is regularly done, why should the fact that it was
                                                        -century Great Britain, and, in 1847, Esther
not a specific day, take away from all the previous
                                                        Howland developed a successful business in her
expressions of love you have received?
                                                        Worcester, Massachusetts home with hand-
                                                        made Valentine cards based on British models.
Ways to Love & Nurture your relationship:
                                                        The popularity of Valentine cards in 19th century
                                                        America, where many Valentine cards are now
       Show each other you care - it's the little      general greeting cards rather than declarations of
        things as well as the big things you do for
                                                        love, was a harbinger of the future commerciali-
        each other as an expression of love,
                                                        zation of holidays in the United States.[2] It's con-
                                                        sidered one of the Hallmark holidays.
       Don't take each other for granted, show
        appreciation for what you spouse does for
        you and your family,                            The U.S. Greeting Card Association estimates
                                                        that approximately one billion valentines are sent
       Buy cards and gifts just to say I love you      each year worldwide, making the day the second
        and was thinking of you, not just for birth-    largest card-sending holiday of the year, be-
        day's, Valentine's Day and Christmas!           hind Christmas. The association estimates that, in
                                                        the US, men spend on average twice as much
                                                        money as women.[3]
       Have date nights, you both have a respon-
        sibility to get the children in bed early on in
        the evening so you can have the rest of the Saint Valentine
        night to yourselves!
                                                        Numerous early Christian martyrs were
                                                        named Valentine.[4] The Valentines honored on
       Communicate with each other, get to know the
                                                        February 14 are Valentine of Rome
        other's heart.                                  (Valentinus presb. m. Romae) and Valentine of

36                   Copyright Love Nurture 09                               

5] Valentine of Rome[6] was a priest                 Legenda Aurea still providing no connections
in Rome who suffered martyrdom about AD 269          whatsoever with sentimental love, appropriate
and was buried on the Via Flaminia. His relics are   lore has been embroidered in modern times to
at the Church of Saint Praxed in Rome.[7] and        portray Valentine as a priest who refused an
at Whitefriar Street Carmelite Church in Dublin,     unattested law attributed
Ireland.                                             to Roman Emperor Claudius II, allegedly or-
                                                     dering that young men remain single. The Em-
                                                     peror supposedly did this to grow his army,
Valentine of Terni[8] became bishop of Interamna believing that married men did not make for
(modern Terni) about AD 197 and is said to have good soldiers. The priest Valentine, however,
been killed during the persecution of Empero-        secretly performed marriage ceremonies for
rAurelian. He is also buried on the Via Flaminia,    young men. When Claudius found out about
but in a different location than Valentine of Rome. this, he had Valentine arrested and thrown in
His relics are at the Basilica of Saint Valentine in jail. In an embellishment to The Golden Leg-
Terni (Basilica di San Valentino).[9]                end provided by American Greetings, Inc.
The Catholic Encyclopedia also speaks of a third to and widely repeated, on the
saint named Valentine who was mentioned in           evening before Valentine was to be executed,
early martyrologies under date of February 14.       he wrote the first "valentine" himself, ad-
He was martyred in Africa with a number of com- dressed to a young girl variously identified as
panions, but nothing more is known about him.        his beloved, as the jailer's daughter whom he
[10]                                                 had befriended and healed, or both. It was a
                                                     note that read "From your Valentine."

No romantic elements are present in the original
early medieval biographies of either of these mar-
tyrs. By the time a Saint Valentine became linked
to romance in the fourteenth century, distinctions
between Valentine of Rome and Valentine of
Terni were utterly lost.[11]

In the 1969 revision of the Roman Catholic Cal-
endar of Saints, the feast day of Saint Valen-
tine on February 14 was removed from the Gen-
eral Roman Calendar and relegated to particular
(local or even national) calendars for the following
reason: "Though the memorial of Saint Valentine
is ancient, it is left to particular calendars, since,
apart from his name, nothing is known of Saint
Valentine except that he was buried on the Via
Flaminia on February 14."[12] The feast day is              “Don't take each other
still celebrated in Balzan (Malta) where relics of
the saint are claimed to be found, and also                for granted, show ap-
throughout the world by Traditionalist Catho-              preciation for what you
lics who follow the older, pre-Vatican II calendar.
                                                           spouse does for you...”
The Early Medieval acta of either Saint Valentine
were excerpted by Bede and briefly expounded
in Legenda Aurea.[13] According to that version,
St Valentine was persecuted as a Christian and
interrogated by Roman Emperor Claudius II in
person. Claudius was impressed by Valentine
and had a discussion with him, attempting to get To find out about our Love Nurture Valentine
him to convert to Roman paganism in order to       function and to receive your personal invitation
save his life. Valentine refused and tried to con- Visit the Love Nurture website news page.
vert Claudius to Christianity instead. Because of
this, he was executed. Before his execution, he is
reported to have performed a miracle by healing
the blind daughter of his jailer.

37                   Copyright Love Nurture 09                         

     LOVE N




Improving your                                         I started my weight loss journey like most women

health & beauty.                                       after the birth of my first child and went up in
                                                       weight a few stones; and I have to admit that it
                                                       was not all due to pregnancy hormones.

Your health and beauty is very important to God. If    Frankly, I did not exercise much self control when
they were not they would not be mentioned in the bi-   I was expecting for most of my pregnancies and
ble.                                                   would eat whatever I fancied, so gaining weight
                                                       was inevitable.
I Timothy 4:8 - ‘For bodily exercise profiteth lit-
tle ...‘ (KJV)                                         It would take about 6 months to a year to lose the
                                                       weight after child birth and with every child it
Psalm 139:14 - ‗I will praise thee; for I am fear-     would take a bit longer.
fully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy
works; and that my soul knoweth right well             What I discovered was that after every preg-
‗ (KJV)                                                nancy, weight loss seemed to be harder and it
                                                       probably didn‘t help that I was older, trying to lose
1 Peter 2: 9 - ‗But you are a chosen people, a         weight in my thirties.
royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belong-
ing to God, that you may declare the praises of        Well, the last straw was after my 4 year old was
him who called you out of darkness into his won-       born and I had postpartum preeclampsia (High
derful light. 10Once you were not a people, but        blood pressure following child birth) I was told by
now you are the people of God; once you had not        a few doctors I had to bring my weight down as I
received mercy, but now you have received              could be at risk of stroke or die due to complica-
mercy‘.                                                tions resulting from it.

You need to understand that there is something         I had previously read a lot of slimming and weight
to be gained from exercise and God made you            loss magazines, including the book by Lisa
taking every care, so although you are not perfect     Bevere, ‗You are not what you weigh‘ and had
you are precious and you take care of something        done some aerobic exercises with a lot of brisk
that is precious! No one treats something or           walking which had helped me lose weight. How-
someone that is precious carelessly, but with          ever, now I needed to deal with my eating habits,
                                                       especially my sweet tooth once and for all. Over
                                                       the years I had also discovered so many tech-
                                                       niques to                                   losing
 “So although you are not per-                         weight                                      and
 fect you are precious and you                         finally                                     came
                                                       to the re-
 take care of something that is                        alisation                                   that
 precious!                                             for weight                                  loss to
                                                       be perma-                                   nent, I
                                                       had to                                      make
care.                                                  it a life-                                  style
God requires that we take the same care with our
bodies and if we don‘t we fall prey to all the sick-
ness and diseases that flow from a bad diet and
lack of exercise; this I feel is a sin.

Knowledge is powerful, and in this article we will
address the area of improving health and fitness.

We can‘t all be models and stars, but we can all
look the best we can and on a budget— with no
personal trainers, gourmet meals and fitness re-

40                   Copyright Love Nurture 09                              

I had to eat to live and not live to eat no matter
how delicious the snack (these were my area of       have to confess to all the things I had gorged my-
weakness).                                           self on in private.

                                                     Being of large built allowed me a lot of flexibility
                                                     in my weight, I joke in my house that even my
                                                     skeleton isn‘t skinny. However, my increased
                                                     weight gain began to ‗spoil‘ my look and had
                                                     negative health effects.

                                                     During my weight loss journey I discovered Im-
                                                     prove Weight Loss amongst several resources
                                                     and it‘s been a wealth of valuable information
                                                     ‗under one roof‘—see below.

                                                   I have not yet reached my goal, but I am over
                                                   20lbs lighter since summer of this year where I
                                                   looked matronly at a wedding I had attended - I
I had to stop using food to as a substitute , if I am about 77kg now and counting down weekly.
was happy I would sing, if I was sad, I would en- Weight loss is steady and every day I feel more
courage myself by praying and watching my fa-      toned, my clothes fit better and I look better and I
vourite comedy, if I was bored, I would find some- have not yo-yoed in a while.
thing useful to do other than eat. This all became
possible because I would constantly pray for wis- Now I have the tools to lose weight and know
dom and grace to exercise self control as will     that they work I shall reach my goal of 68kg soon.
power didn‘t seem to be working. I also learnt
how to avoid temptation and say no to cravings
especially, if I was not hungry and this soon be-     “I had to stop using food
came a new habit.                                     to as a substitute...”
I finally joined the gym at work and joined a
weight loss forum to help make me accountable
to other people in similar conditions. Well, it
helped to keep me in check as I did not want to

                                                     To receive a free weight Loss report visit

                                                     Name: Eruvwu J. Obuaya
                                                     Age: 42
                                                     Height: 5‘8‘‘
                                                     Built: Big boned
                                                     Waist: 31 inches
                                                     Hips: 41 inches
                                                     Current BMI: 27
                                                     Healthy Target: 22-25

                                                     Healthy weight range for female same age and
                                                     height is: between 126 to 154 lbs (57 to 69 kg)

                                                     See overleaf for my health and beauty tips.

41                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                              

                                                          If your BMI is between 30 and 39.9, you're
Eruvwu‘s Weight Loss Tips:
- Keep fry up to a bear minimum, less take out/
ways,                                                     If your BMI is over 40, you're very obese.
- Grill instead of fry meat, chicken, fish etc. If
properly                                               If you have a BMI of over 25, you need to think
spiced it's delicious and you lose most of the         about losing weight because you have an in-
saturated fat                                          creased risk of developing serious health prob-
(you have to place your meats on the metal rails       lems, such as heart disease, diabetes, and
in the oven to drip into a pan),
                                                        several forms of cancer.
- regular exercises, brisk walks, aerobics, Pilates,
gym and even vigorous house cleaning,                  If your BMI is over 30, you need to make some
- Always, ALWAYS, eat breakfast, it's the most
                                                       immediate changes to your lifestyle in order to
important meal of the day,
                                                       lose weight. NHS Direct can provide you with
- drink plenty of water,                               advice about how to lose weight safely, but you
- Avoid late dinners and midnight snacks (I've         should also make an appointment to see your
generally eaten my dinner by 6.30pm or 7pm at          GP.
the latest!
                                                   Body fat isn't just a useless lump of stored fat. It
What‟s BMI?
                                                   cushions and protects vital organs such as the
                                                   liver, kidneys and heart, and helps our body to
The Body Mass Index (BMI) is a tool that can be stay at the right temperature. It produces hor-
used to tell how healthy a person's weight is. You mones and many other chemical messen-
can use the BMI to find out if you're a healthy    gers that are important for fertility (we need a cer-
weight for your height.                            tain amount of fat on our hips and thighs to stay
                                                   in tip-top reproductive shape), bone strength, im-
If you know your height and weight, you can work
                                                   munity, regulation of sugar and fats in the blood,
out which weight range you're in using the simple and appetite control - By WLR
steps outlined below.                              Dietician, Lyndel Costain BSc RD.
    Take your weight in kilograms (kg) and
                                                       Male                      Female
     divide it by your height in metres (m).
    Then divide the result by your height in          Height      Ideal         Height Ideal
                                                                 Body weight            Body weight
     metres (m) again.
For example, if you weigh 70kg, and you're             4' 6"    63 - 77 lbs.     4' 6"    63 - 77 lbs.
1.75m tall, your BMI would be 22.9 (70/1.75 = 40       4' 7"    68 - 84 lbs.     4' 7"    68 - 83 lbs.
and 40/1.75 = 22.9).                                   4' 8"    74 - 90 lbs.     4' 8"    72 - 88 lbs.
                                                       4' 9"    79 - 97 lbs.     4' 9"    77 - 94 lbs.
BMI calculator                                         4' 10"   85 - 103 lbs.    4' 10"   81 - 99 lbs.
                                                       4' 11"   90 - 110 lbs.    4' 11"   86 - 105 lbs.
                                                       5' 0"    95 - 117 lbs.    5' 0"    90 - 110 lbs.
Alternatively, use our BMI calculator. Simply en-      5' 1"    101 - 123 lbs.   5' 1"    95 - 116 lbs.
ter your height, weight and sex to find out your       5' 2"    106 - 130 lbs.   5' 2"    99 - 121 lbs.
BMI. See the 'further information' section for a       5' 3"    112 - 136 lbs.   5' 3"    104 - 127 lbs.
link to the BMI calculator.                            5' 4"    117 - 143 lbs.   5' 4"    108 - 132 lbs.
The BMI weight ranges, as set out by the World         5' 5"    122 - 150 lbs.   5' 5"    113 - 138 lbs.
                                                       5' 6"    128 - 156 lbs.   5' 6"    117 - 143 lbs.
Health Organisation (WHO), are outlined below.         5' 7"    133 - 163 lbs.   5' 7"    122 - 149 lbs.
    If your BMI is less than 18.4, you're under-      5' 8"    139 - 169 lbs.   5' 8"    126 - 154 lbs.
     weight for your height.                           5' 9"    144 - 176 lbs.   5' 9"    131 - 160 lbs.
                                                       5' 10"   149 - 183 lbs.   5' 10"   135 - 165 lbs.
    If your BMI is between 18.5 and 24.9,             5' 11"   155 - 189 lbs.   5' 11"   140 - 171 lbs.
     you're an ideal weight for your height.           6' 0"    160 - 196 lbs.   6' 0"    144 - 176 lbs.
                                                       6' 1"    166 - 202 lbs.   6' 1"    149 - 182 lbs.
    If your BMI is between 25 and 29.9, you're        6' 2"    171 - 209 lbs.   6' 2"    153 - 187 lbs.
     over the ideal weight for your height.

42                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                              

                                                          All hard and cream cheeses are high-fat foods.
6' 3"    176 - 216 lbs.         6' 3"    158 - 193 lbs.   Reduce the amount of cheese in sauces and
6' 4"    182 - 222 lbs.         6' 4"    162 - 198 lbs.   dishes by using smaller amounts of strongly fla-
6' 5"    187 - 229 lbs.         6' 5"    167 - 204 lbs.   voured cheese or adding the cheese to the top of
6' 6"    193 - 235 lbs.         6' 6"    171 - 209 lbs.   the dish instead of in the dish. Try lower-fat
6' 7"    198 - 242 lbs.         6' 7"    176 - 215 lbs.   cheeses such as Edam, Gouda and Jarlsberg
6' 8"    203 - 249 lbs.         6' 8"    180 - 220 lbs.   cheese as well as cottage cheese. They make
6' 9"    209 - 255 lbs.         6' 9"    185 - 226 lbs.   great sandwich or baked potato fillings mixed with
6' 10"   214 - 262 lbs.         6' 10"   189 - 231 lbs.   chopped spring onion, watercress, pickles or chut-
6' 11"   220 - 268 lbs.         6' 11"   194 - 237 lbs.   neys.
7' 0"    225 - 275 lbs.         7' 0"    198 - 242 lbs.
                                                          Soften vegetables in a splash of olive oil before
                                                          making soups. Use a vegetable stock or just add
10 Ways to Reduce Fat                                     water and then season with herbs, a dash
                                                          of Tamari or some Shoyu. These last two ingredi-
Dr Christine Fenn                                         ents are used a lot in Chinese cooking and are
                                                          made from fermented soya beans. They add a
The main appeal of keeping your fat intake low            richness to soups - without a trace of meat or fat.
and eating starchy carbohydrate foods instead is          Great for vegetarians. Also see lower fat soups.
that you can enjoy so much more food. You can
relish vast quantities of starchy, high fibre foods.      Cream
Whilst a high-fat snack is over in seconds, you are       Use low-fat yogurt instead of cream or use half
still munching on an alternative carbo food. It is        and half. Use this for decoration rather as a main
possible to eat a whole meal for the equiva-              ingredient. See alternatives to cream.
lent calorific value of one packet of crisps!
Red Meat Poultry Fish Cheese Soups                        Avoid short crust, cheese or flaky pastry, they are
                                                          all high in fat. Use filo pastry on the top of a dish
Cream Pastry Milk Sandwiches Salads                       only, or try a potato or an oaty crumble as an alter-
                                                          native topping.
Red Meat
Use smaller quantities of meat in meals and larger Milk
quantities of beans, vegetables or pasta. Use lean Use skimmed milk or skimmed milk powder as
cuts of meat or trim off any visible fat.          much as possible in sauces and custards.

Poultry                                                   Sandwiches
Most of the fat content of chicken is just under the      Use less margarine or butter, or spread on one
skin, so remove the skin before cooking and the           side of the bread only. Some mayonnaise-based
fat comes away with it. Try organic chicken or tur-       or moist fillings do not need any spread.
key - the flavour of the meat is different compared
with intensively produced birds which can be             Salads
rather tasteless. You get a better eating experi-        Mayonnaise and salad cream contain a lot of fat.
ence, the birds get a better life!                       Make salad dressings with natural yogurt, herbs,
                                                         spices, tomato juice, vinegar and lemon juice.
Fish                                                     Don't be afraid of using French dressing. Make
This is such a fabulous food. We need to eat more your own from lemon juice, first presses organic
of it, but save the fried variety for a real treat. Tuna olive oil, cider or wine vinegar, crushed garlic and
fish risotto, salmon stir-fry or smoked mackerel         a teaspoon of ready made mustard. Toss a mix-
with baked potatoes make excellent meals. These ture of wonderful green salad leaves with a few
oily fish are higher in fat compared with white          walnuts, flaked toasted almonds, pumpkin
fish such as cod or hake, but the fat is essential       seeds and chopped fresh dates, apples and celery
fat. We need a small amount of these essential           and mix in some French dressing for a fabulous
fats every day. They are the omega 3 and omega salad. The small amount of fat that this salad does
6 fats which are used by the body to balance hor- contain is essential fat - so enjoy the flavours, col-
mone levels, reduce inflammation in joints and           ours and wonderful fats! View our low fat salad
produce elastic connective tissue - which is the         dressings.
basis of wonderful skin.
                                                         (continued overleaf)

43                        Copyright Love Nurture 09                            

How to Decide What Lotion to
                                                           Get a night lotion with a relaxing effect
Use and When                                               Most moisturizes works well at night. This is be-
                                                           cause when you sleep the body is in total relaxa-
                                                           tion. During which time, the process of moisturizing
                                                           works to its maximum. So to ensure yourself of a
                                                           good night sleep and a beauty rest every time, get
                                                           yourself a bottle of relaxing lotion with a mild scent
                                                           of essential oils like chamomile, jasmine, and lav-

                                                      Buying and using just any lotion is not exactly right.
                                                      Always get a bath lotion for dry skin or a body lo-
                                                      tion for oily skin, if your skin is like that. Milk bath
All these types of skin care body lotion come in a    skin lotion, on the other hand, is what you should
variety of scents, healing abilities, and features.   use if you want to maintain your skin's youthful
Also, it uses different essential oils to be more ef- glow. The proper care of your skin starts with the
fective. It is quite easy to determine which type of  type of lotion you choose!
lotion to buy but nonetheless, here are good tips to Articles used curtsey of Skin Way.
guide you: Get a sunscreen lotion if you intend to
stay under the sun for long Sunscreen lotions are
popularly used in beaches and uncovered pools.
But it should also be used for other outdoor activi-
ties that require you to be under the sun for hours.
Such activities include hiking, mountain climbing,
and day camping. If you want to watch sports and
games held in an open arena, better get a bottle as
                                                         “Get all-natural
well.                                                    high moisturizing lo-
                                                             tion for your everyday use
Get lotions with AHA or alpha hydroxyl acids if              Just like perfumes...”
your skin needs firming AHA is a very popular lo-
tion ingredient. It is an acid found in red wine, sour
milk, and certain fruits. It is also effective in
smoothing skin that is damaged by the sun's harm-
ful rays. Get it if you think your skin has lost its in-
nate radiance.

Get scented lotions for a romantic effect
Your skin needs fragrance too. And to ensure that
your body scent does not rely on your perfume
alone, apply lotion that matches your favorite fra-
grance for that date tonight. Also, try to use a
matching lotion lip balm with your lipstick. You
don't want your skin to dry out and ruin your per-
fect night, would you? Get all-natural
high moisturizing lotion for your everyday use
Just like perfumes, you have ones you use every-
day and ones you use only for special occasions. It
goes true for lotions as well.

An all-effective lotion with a mild scent is perfect
for an after bath lotion. And most of the time, these
come cheaper than those colored and fragrant
ones. Organic skin care products fall under this

44                   Copyright Love Nurture 09                                   

45   Copyright Love Nurture 09

                                              fident, efficient, etc).

                                              Lesson #2, As Parents it is very impor-
                                              tant to raise your Children in a health
                                              Christian enviroment-meaning you will
                                              need to practice what you preach or what
                                              you pretend to be in Church.
                                              Loving each other and considering each

                                              other more than yourself need to be
                                              shown. Showing love toward one an-
                                              other will create a healthy atmos-
                                              phere. Therefore, you are teaching
                                              and showing your Children how to love
                                              one another. So the Love character is
                                              being built at a young age.

                                              Lesson #3, The bible say train up a child
                                              in the way he/she should go and they
                                              won't depart from it - Proverb 22:6. This
                                              Scripture is so true as all of the Holy
 10 Ways to Raise Children                    Scriptures are.
 of Integrity and Character
                                         It is so important those first 6-10 years of
                                         any Child is the most informative
                                         years. Who spends the most time with
1. Start at the moment of conception (as your Child is the one who forms he/
we are Saints we can begin speaking to she. Who is your Care Provider-it is
the seed as soon as you find out you are Mom, Dad, Babysitter, etc?
with Child.) The word says Jeremiah
was known by God before He was           Who ever is around your Child the most
formed in his Mother's womb- He said     is the one who is forming your Child
before he was born He sanctified him-He Character. You cannot allow your Chil-
ordained him as Prophet to the Nation    dren to be around any and every kind of
(Jeremiah 1:4-5.)                        people for the most.

Start speaking to your child by decreeing     Now we know we are in the world but not
and declaring the Word of the Lord over       of it-so of course we go to the movies, of
He/She life. Binding and loosing              course we visit relatives, etc. But who
things, breaking generational curses.         spends the most quality time with them?

Get a head start. When the thought is in      Seek the Wisdom of God concerning
your mind that's its time to bring forth      raising your Children. You maybe criti-
seed into the earth start decreeing and       cize for raising your Child in the fear of
declaring God's Word over the seed. God       the Lord.
desires truth from the inward parts. Say
my baby will be this and that (honest, lov-   Lesson #4, Don't be afraid to say no to
ing, mighty, kind, fear the Lord all the      your Children and stick with it. Parents
days of his/her life, prosperous, good        do not disagree about how to discipline
health, intelligent, wise, courageous, con-   your Child in front of them.
46              Copyright Love Nurture 09                      

                                                Do not let others raise your Children-this
                                                is your responsibility. You want them to
“The bible say train up                         start to make decision on their own when
                                                its possible. Give them responsibilities
a child in the way he/                          around the house in Church and reward
she should go and                               them for doing a great job (its their effort
                                                and attitude).
they won't depart from
it - Proverb 22:6.”

Always have an understanding before
hand-if not -who ever is in charge at that
time-please yield to the decision at that
particular time.

Discuss later the right and wrong-after
the rethought decision revisit with Child-
you may have to apologize.

#5, Balance-Mathew 6:33, But seek first Written by Apostle Barbara Taylor
the Kingdom of God and His righteous-
ness, and all these things shall be added To be continued in the next edition.
to you.

Ask the Holy Spirit for Wisdom and get
an understanding with it. There will be
discussion you will have to make as Your
Children are getting older, wanting to do
as the others are doing.

YOU have to go with your own convic-
tions, communicate with your Family,
have sit down time and let them talk.

Ask them daily what was their day like-
you want to know what affected them to-
day. What are their likes and dis-                   Pastors Ernest and Barbara Taylor are
likes. Who are they admiring (how far to             the founders of Word of Life Ministries, a
                                                     unique ministry in which God truly mani-
go with it). Keep them active in Church,             fests His glory. They are a powerful hus-
after School programs (get involve                   band and wife ministry team stomping
in their activities, both Parents if both are        the devil every chance they get. They
                                                     are based in Chicago IL.

47            Copyright Love Nurture 09                         

48   Copyright Love Nurture 09

The Marriage Covenant
Definition and origin of love - Divine Grace Commission
TRANSFORMATION 2009, The Word Conference.

•   “If u have love in your life, it can make up
     for a great many things you lack. If you Matthew 25:31-46
     don‟t have it, no matter what else there
     is, it‟s not enough”. – Ann Landers

                                                              When the Son of man shall come in his
•    “Love is not primarily a relationship to a                glory, and all the holy angels with him,
      specific person; it is an attitude; an ori-              then shall he sit upon the throne of his
      entation of character which determines                   glory: And before him shall be gathered
      the relation of a person to the world as a               all nations: and he shall separate them
      whole….If I truly love one person I love                 one from another, as a shepherd di-
      all persons”…..Erich Fromm                               videth his sheep from the goats: And he
                                                               shall set the sheep on his right hand,
                                                               but the goats on the left. Then shall the
•     “Love and kindness are never wasted.                     King say unto them on his right hand,
      They always make a difference. They                      Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit
      bless the one who receives them, and                     the kingdom prepared for you from the
      they bless you, the giver. – Barbara De                  foundation of the world: For I was an
      Angelis                                                  hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was
                                                               thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a
                                                               stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and
•     “Love does not die easily. It is a living                ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited
      thing. It thrives in the face of all of life's           me: I was in prison, and ye came unto
      adversities- James D.Bryden                              me. Then shall the righteous answer
                                                               him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an
                                                               hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and
                                                               gave thee drink? When saw we thee a
•     “When the power of love overcomes the                    stranger, and took thee in? or naked,
      love of power the world will know peace                  and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee
      - Jimi Hendrix                                           sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
                                                               And the King shall answer and say unto
                                                               them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch
•    “We have just enough religion to make us                  as ye have done it unto one of the least
      hate, but not enough to make us love                     of these my brethren, ye have done it
      one another.- Jonathan Swift                             unto me.

•Love- characteristic of God                           Meaning of passage

                                                                 Love is the catalyst of all things
•“God is love”
                                                                 The words “Inasmuch as ye have
•Agape- New Testament                                             done it”- emphasizes love as an ac-
                                                                 The words of scripture divide us
•Agape:- non-partial and sacrificial love                         into sheep and goats according to
                                                                  our "works of love.“
•John 3:16                                                       The true meaning of love was indi-
                                                                  rectly shown to God through the act
                                                                  of love shown directly to their fellow
•Agape love requires a relationship with God                      man
through Jesus Christ.

•Christ is the ultimate definition of love.

                                                       Continued overleaf

49                   Copyright Love Nurture 09                            

   God created marriage as an institution between one man and one woman

   Marriage is the firmest foundation for building a family.

   Some Hebrew definitions and interpretations below:

                               In the beginning (Breeshiyt)

         Tav            Yud         Shin          Alef          Rash   Bet

                                    First fruit (Reeshiyt)

          Tav            Yud               Shin          Alef          Rash

                                          LOVE (AHAVA)

                Hei                 Bet                  Hei            Alef

    50                Copyright Love Nurture 09                    

      Grace                          ‘To give’

     Meaning: I give or I love. Also im-
     plies: Love is giving

51       Copyright Love Nurture 09     

              Yud                   Dalet          Shin

     Meaning: I give or I love. Also
     implies: Love is giving

        Hei                                Dalet     S hin

52             Copyright Love Nurture 09           

                                Man: (Ish)

                  Shin                  Yud                       Alef

                      Woman: (Ishah)

                Hei                     Shin                     Alef

     Prov 18: 22 Your favour is with you. Hei means Grace and is the woman that bring
     grace in a union. A HELPER.

                 Divine Grace Commission production

53              Copyright Love Nurture 09                        

                  God: (Yah)

                           Hei          Yud

                    Fire: (Esh)

        Shin                     Alef

     That is why relationship burning up sometimes

54   Copyright Love Nurture 09             

     Bride: (Kallah)

     Hei                       Lamed            Kaf

     Vav                          Tav           Het

           Divine Grace Commission production

55         Copyright Love Nurture 09        

             Power: (Koach)

              Hei                               Kaf

Deut 8: 18

 Whenever the husband and wife are in togetherness, the POWER to acquire wealth will be
 functional. No wonder the devil wants to disunite families. No wonder Finances gets messed

               Divine Grace Commission production

56                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                    


In Genesis 2, when God provides a helper for Adam, He used a glorious Hebrew word for helper:
azer. "Then the Lord God said, 'It is not a beneficial thing for the man to be alone. I will make for him
an azer who is his complement or equal.'" In Hebrew, azer is used 19 times; mostly it is used to de-
note humanity's great helper. The word means a "helper like unto God." God paid a compliment to
women with this word. The same word is used in Psalms, where it says, "O Israel, trust in the Lord,
for He is their Helper and shield" (Psalm 115:9). The term is always used to describe someone who
brings significant help.

                            Rich: (Aser)

               Dalet                        Shin                    Ayin

                                                                           Continued on page page 60.

57                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                              

Conflict resolution
Disagreement is inevitable and sometimes healthy in marriage.

When you live in close proximity like husbands and wives, your bound to argue.

In marriage you will disagree over
Raising the children,

An important fact to note is, we are different, namely in:

Provided there is no manipulation we can work with and around these. There are a number of ways
in which to do this:

In marriage you have to affirm each other, by showing appreciation to the other. A simple and sin-
Thank you or using the word please can do wonders and when you don‘t get it, you don‘t feel valued.

Appreciation is the opposite of criticism.

Concentrate and focus on the things you like about each other and you will see each other in a new

―One man told his wife on his wedding day that he loved her and that he would advise her if the
situation changes, it hasn‘t! And he wonders why she complains that he does not love her.‖

Tell each other daily how appreciative you are of them, it great for morale and team building.

Understanding your spouse‟s temperament:
Another area of conflict is the way we choose to unwind, an introvert will have a different approach
to an *extrovert, an extrovert may wish to unwind on a Friday night with a room full of people while a
introvert may want to stay at home.

In regards to money the differences are glaringly obvious, where a wife may be quite happy spend-
ing money, her husband may be too cautious. There has to be a balance, where you learn to budget
and avoid debt on the one hand, while the cautious one learns to be a bit more liberal.

Arguments over money—let the more organised or astute take care of the money , draw up a
budget, decide to only use cash and not cards. Find possible solutions, write them down together
and keep trying them out to you find the one that works for you.

Laughter is extremely important in a relationship, you have to learn to laugh with each other and see
the funny side of situations and circumstances. Find out what makes the other smile or laugh and
seek to make it happen often

The art of negotiation, a proper way to resolve conflict:
Find the best time, not when either is:

58                  Copyright Love Nurture 09                           

Don‘t label each other‘s character when confronting the other, instead say how you feel by saying, ‗I
feel hurt when you...‘ instead of, ‗You never or You‘re always doing this that and the other!‘

Take the time to hear the other out without interruption or thinking up a defence so you‘re not really
listening, but waiting for an opportunity to have your say.

Learning to apply all this is a clear indication of love in action and will help to bring you two closer.
There is another extremely important reason to resolve your conflicts quickly:

                  “In marriage you have to affirm each
                  other, by showing appreciation to
                  the other, When you don’t get it, you
                  don’t feel valued.”

1 Peter 3:7 says, ―Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat
them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that
nothing will hinder your prayers.‖

Conflict resolution has to allow for both of us considering how we may need to change and not be
unmoveable or rigid. You cannot change your spouse, but you can change yourself.

We must tell each other about the issues that matter to us and not let issues go unresolved silently
seething for years and eventually causing us to drift apart and split up.

Remember you are different and who you are has been made up of your different upbringing, tem-
perament and backgrounds, so be understanding and considerate of each other and move closer
together in conflict resolution.

Austin & Eruvwu Obuaya.

*Definition: Most people believe that an extrovert is a person who is friendly and outgoing. While that may be
true, that is not the true meaning of extroversion. Basically, an extrovert is a person who is energized by being
around other people. This is the opposite of an introvert who is energized by being alone.

Extroverts tend to "fade" when alone and can easily become bored without other people around. When given
the chance, an extrovert will talk with someone else rather than sit alone and think. In fact, extroverts tend to
think as they speak, unlike introverts who are far more likely to think before they speak. Extroverts often think
best when they are talking. Concepts just don't seem real to them unless they can talk about them; reflecting on
them isn't enough.

Extroverts enjoy social situations and even seek them out since they enjoy being around people. Their ability to
make small talk makes them appear to be more socially adept than introverts (although introverts may have little
difficulty talking to people they don't know if they can talk about concepts or issues).

Extrovert behavior seems to be the standard in American society, which means that other behavior is judged
against the ways an extrovert would behave. However, extroverted behavior is simply a manifestation of the
way an extrovert interacts with the world. Extroverts are interested in and concerned with the external world—by
Carol Bainbridge .

59                    Copyright Love Nurture 09                                   
60                                        Continued from p. 57

             Tithe: (Maaser)

     Dalet                Shin               Ayin                  Mem

                Helper: (Azer)

         Ayin                      Shin                     Yud

60     Copyright Love Nurture 09                        

1.Focus on your spouse's strengths rather than their weaknesses.

2.Encourage rather than criticize.

3.Pray for your spouse instead of gossiping about them.

4.Learn and live what Christ teaches about relating to and loving
5.Fight selfishness by developing a servant's heart. Commit yourself to acting in your spouse's best

6.Instead of picking at each other, choose to let things go. Be grace-givers. Remember that "love
covers a multitude of sins" (1 Pet. 4:8).

7.Intentional in keeping your marriage at the centre of your family. Have date nights, and schedule
times away to invest in the intimacy of your relationship.

8.commit to actively be respectful to your spouse by never saying anything negative to other people.
Be kind in your words and actions. Treat each other as courteously and with the kind of honour you
would bestow on a stranger or a dear friend.

9.Ladies, resign as your husband's mother. You married an adult; treat him with the respect an adult
deserves. Men: Your wife needs a servant-leader—someone who refuses either passivity or tyr-
anny—to love her as Christ loves the church.

10.And last, when you're angry, express it wisely and constructively. Use words like "I'm angry about
this" instead of yelling or hurtful silence. If you're too mad to speak with self-control, wait till you cool
down. And don't go to bed without dealing with the situation (Eph. 4:26).

“You don't have to trash your marriage. You can treasure it instead.”

Article provided courtesy of Pastor Sylvester Ojobo of Divine Grace Commission, taken from the Transformation
Word Conference, Secrets on how to Restore, Build, Establish and Unify Marriages.

Pastor Sylvester is a man of God who desire is to ensure
 that everyone see Christ Jesus in his nature of loveliness
and to make known through the expository teachings and
preaching of the Divine Grace and the perfection of his
works. Together with his wife they have three children.

61                   Copyright Love Nurture 09                               

                      WOMEN‟S CONFERENCE:
                      ‟EVE ARE YOU STILL THERE?‟ (CHICAGO IL)

The 2009 6th Annual Women’s Prophetic Prayer
Gathering in Chicago IL from the 18th –20th         She seeks to glorify God alone.
September was a powerful time of inspiration and She has courage.
fellowship.                                         She enlists others to work.
                                                    She is determined!
The theme: Rising Beyond the Curse in the Gar- See below poem by Wanda Scott:
den—Eve, are you still there? was divinely in-      ‘Woman of God’
spired. Hosted by the Word of Life Ministries, it Woman of God In Him you are complete
did not disappoint and as any one of the delegates Woman of God
can tell you it was a turning point in the lives of With no man must you compete
everyone present who came expecting.                Woman of God
                                                    He has given you so many gifts
It was great to see Baptist ‘s and Pentecostals and Woman of God
a host of other denominations come together in      Only Him you must lift
such unity.                                         Woman of God
                                                    The devil will try and sift…You
On the first day was a closed meeting for first     Woman of God
ladies (Pastor’s wives) and other ministers of the The Lord won’t stop until He is through with you
word, called the Leading Ladies Workshop. Al- Trust in God my sister to fulfil your every need
though I wish to respect the privacy of the meet- Trust in God my sister with Him you will suc-
ing, I can say it was about breaking free from the ceed
chains that bind (of our own and other’s making);
achieving a godly balance between your family
life and ministry; and Knowing who you are as a
woman and child and God in your marriage and
ministry.                                                    “Achieving a godly bal-
                                                          ance between your fam-
The topic was:                                            ily life and ministry...”
“Pursuing your purpose and destiny”

Women with purpose and destiny!

She knows she is called by God.
                                                   Have Faith in God my sister no man will supply
She Depends on Prayer                              your every need
                                                   Have Faith in God my sister God’s man for you
She has vision and sees the greatness of the work. will be exactly what you need
                                                   Press forward with God my sister
She is submitted to authority.                     He is strong when you are weak
                                                   Press forward with God my sister
She is organized in her work.                      He is the promise and perseverance you seek
                                                   Woman of God
She is able to discern the tactics of the enemy .

She works hard.

She lives an exemplary life.

62                 Copyright Love Nurture 09                         

You must know your worth
Woman of God                                           10.   Gratitude - An attitude of thank-
You are royalty by His birth                                 fullness that becomes a way of
                   .Woman of God                             life.
 Let God use through you...speak to you
 Let no man use you…or confuse you…or abuse you
                   Woman of God
               How do you define you?
                   Woman of God
Let Jesus design you….into the real you….His predes-
                      tined you
                 ….His perfected you
                   Woman of God
                  Enjoy the journey
                   Woman of God
              Being prepared for eternity.

Also, in the workshop we learnt about:
„10 Qualities of a Potential leader‟ which are:

1.    Positivity: The ability to work with and see
      people in and situations in a positive way.

2.    Servitude : The willingness to
      submit , play team ball and follow
      t he leader .

3.    Growth Potential : A hunger for
      personal growth and development;
      the ability to keep growing as the
      job expands.

4.     Follow Through: The determin-
       ation to get the job done com-
       pletely and with consistency.

5.    Loyalty: The willingness to always
      put the leader and the organization
      above personal desires.

6.    Resiliency: The ability to bounce
      back when problems arise .

7.    Integrity: Trustworthiness and
      solid character; consistent words
      and work.

8.    “Big Picture” Mind Set: The abil-
       ity to see the whole organization
       and all of it’s needs.

9.    Discipline - The willingness to
      do what is required regardless of
       personal mood.

63                   Copyright Love Nurture 09                              

                 'From the Inside Out'
                 By Elizabeth Jeffries
                       (A Poem )

            You are a child of God, placed on this earth
             to answer a calling assigned you at birth,
         only you can accomplish this mission as planned.
        The only true guidance will come from God‘s hand.

            Your personal mission takes courage to find,
             look for it first in Your heart, then your mind.
          That mission will guide you as you take control,
       It‘s the passion and purpose that touches your soul.

        Lead from the inside out an your journey each day,
               Sing your own song in your own way,
              Awaken, be real, let there be no doubt,
                   Say yes I can! And yes I will!
                     Lead from the inside out.

             Harness the energy your mission inspires
            Muster the courage your best work requires
              Challenge yourself, step up to the teat,
            Capture your vision, commit to your quest.

          Don‘t be a brief candle, or just a flicker of light.
            But, be a blazing torch, a fire, oh so bright.
          Stoke the flame higher, each moment you live.
           Then pass on the torch, it‘s your gift to give.

               So go for the gold, go for the glory,
            you take the lead, and you write the story.
            Hear the applause, now take up the baton,
             The orchestra waits, the spotlight is on.

        Lead from the inside out on your journey each day,
               Sing your own song in your own way,
              Awaken be real, let there be not doubt,
                   Say yes I can! And yes I will!
                    Lead... from the inside out.

64   Copyright Love Nurture 09                         

Pictures taken from the conference from the time I and my senior pastor’s wife, arrived in Chicago through to the 3 day conference. A
totally enjoyable experience and well worth the trip. For more visit Word of life Ministries.

65                        Copyright Love Nurture 09                                                 

66   Copyright Love Nurture 09


     Elegant, sincere, determined,
     stubborn, outgoing, optimis-
     tic, cautious, etc. etc.

Tell us about yourself?                          on my life, but I did use some of my charac-
As you know I am an author, writer, editor       ter traits to bring them to life and I have my
and entrepreneur. You may also know that I       favourite.
am a wife and mother of four also.
                                                 One of the characters had to deal with un-
How would you describe yourself? Ele-            wanted attention, is this something you
gant, sincere, determined, stubborn, outgo-      can relate to? Yes, I can. Strange men
ing, optimistic, cautious, loyal etc. etc.       passing in their cars or walking by in the
                                                 street and once at work.
What is Anchored Assurance about?
It‘s a work of fiction about faith, hope and     What made you think about giving money
friendship in times of adversity. I have three   to charity? It was divinely inspired. I have
protagonists whose lives are entwined            given to charities for years and I regularly felt
through the friendship and obstacles they        helpless and frustrated that I could not do
each have to overcome individually and to-       more for the charities dear to my heart.
gether and how they support each other and
come through.                                    Tell us more about your online presence?
                                                 I am on Twitter, Face Book and LinkedIn
Which character would you say repre-             As well as on the Love Nurture       web-
sents you more?                                  site and
Ah, that would be telling, however, those
who know me might be able to tell. Person-
ally, I didn't mirror anyone of my characters


have a blog which you can mainly access            it was my Christian principles that used to be
from my Love Nurture site. Oh, and how can         an issue as I was expected to lie on occa-
I forget You Tube.                                 sions and I just couldn‘t and wouldn‘t.

Tell me what was the biggest challenge             Tell us about Love Nurture? It‘s about
that you faced writing this novel? Finding         building stronger families based on God‘s
a traditional publisher, marketing, promoting      word - Ephesians 5: 22– 33 is our founda-
and the intricacies of turning it into an eBook    tional scripture; and through the functions,
has taken it to a new level of marketing and       magazine and investment arm we teach,
promoting, the process has been a huge             show and help families become stronger and
challenge.                                         potentially become financially independent
                                                   by creating a residual income.
What‟s happening now with your novel
Anchored Assurance? It‘s now an eBook              You‟re doing something similar with re-
as I‘ve mentioned and is available to pur-         gards to marketing /promotion too, aren‟t
chase via my Love Nurture website. It‘s also       you? If you mean the business opportunity,
available as a business opportunity for the        yes, definitely! The magazine is available to
more savvy person, it‘s all on my Love Nur-        purchase from the 1st December 2009 and
ture website.                                      that's when people can get started on mak-
                                                   ing as much or as little as they want —the
                                                   potential to make money is huge.

                                                   How do you balance it all, family, busi-
     “Personally, I didn't                         ness and work?
                                                   It‘s a balancing act I can assure you and
     mirror anyone of my                           sometimes I don‘t think I manage it well at
     characters on my life,                        all. However, with God I‘m finding all things
                                                   are possible, sometimes I just have to drop
     but I did use some of                         one thing to focus on another and sometimes
     my character traits to                        I just rest once I‘m back from work delegat-
                                                   ing among my children. I find it‘s vital to pri-
     bring them to life and I                      oritise do what is important and necessary
     have my favourite.”                           now and leave the least important until later!

Can we expect another novel from you?
Yes, it‘s been a long time coming, but you
can. I am a story teller, I love to tell , watch
and write stories, however, the constraints of
time have not allowed me to do as much as I
would like to do.

What is it about? It‘s about our heavenly
father‘s love for us also told in fiction and
that‘s all I can say about it for now—watch        If you wish to read Eruvwu‘s first published interview,
this space!                                        titled, ―Mum on the run!‖ visit her blog for details or
                                                   Google search it.
Have you ever had to deal with a difficult Anchored Assurance was successfully launched
boss? How? Yes, sometimes your Christian in November 2003 at the Dulwich Picture
belief‘s don‘t ‗sit‘ well with some people and Gallery in South East London


    All creation shows God‟s majesty
Psalm 8:1


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