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					Jayplay                                               September 1, 2005




 4| Singing in the
    streets
    A profile of Lawrence street
    musicians




 6| Wandering eyes
    The line between cheating and
    “just looking”



 8| Be you write when you leave
    What
         back soon
    and what it means


10| Sneaky snacks
    From Goldfish to pudding




                                    Alwayz chekin’ your buddies’ away
                                    messages? UR not alone... :)
Read                     table of contents
                 2 Weekly choice
                         music and events calendar
                                                                                                     Weekly choice
                                                                                                    Thurs 9/1
                                                                                                   Enjoy FREE tea and treats made by KU Catering in
                                                                                                   the Kansas Union, brought to you by SUA. Source:
                                                                                                   SUA events
                                                                                                                                                           Liquid Buzz Sessions. Last Call, 7 p.m. to 2 a.m.,
                                                                                                                                                          $5 (18+), $2 (21+)




   8
                 4 Bite
                                                                                                                                                          Americana Music Academy Jam. Signs of Life,
                                                                                                   Tea Time. Kansas Union, Level 4, 3 p.m., FREE          7:30 to 9:30 p.m., all ages, FREE
                         sneaking snacks
                                                                                                   Relax, unwind and collect your thoughts with us        Neon 80’s Dance Party. Granada, 10 p.m., $5 (18+),

                 6 Notice
                                                                                                   as one fellow KU community member shares per-          FREE (21+)
                                                                                                   sonal writing and thoughts as a medium for self-
                                                                                                   reflection. Whether you’re looking for the meaning     Photolab. The Jazzhaus, 10 pm, 21+, $3


                                                    Feature
                         calm down! meditate
                                                                                                   of life, or just want to avoid thinking about that
                                                                                                   exam a little longer, Meditation is the source for     Johnny Love, Johnny Belt and the Buckles CD Re-
                                                                                                   your weekly wind-down. Source: SUA events              lease. Davey’s Uptown Rambler’s Club, 21+
                                                      checking the messages
         10 Venue        modern day minstrels
                                                                                                   Meditation. Alderson Auditorium, Kansas Union,
                                                                                                   Level 4, 2:30 p.m., FREE


         12 Contact      watch out for that wandering eye                                             Fri 9/2
         14 Reviews
                                                                                                   Free Play @ The Replay. The Replay Lounge, 3 p.m.      Cowtown Playboys, The Bad Ideas, The Throttlers,
                                                                                                   to 6 p.m., 21+, FREE PINBALL                           Hot Rod Hillbillies. Davey’s Uptown Rambler’s
                                                                                                                                                          Club, 8:30 p.m., 21+, $10
                         listen, read, watch, play
                                                                                                   Ghosty, Conner, Arthur Dodge, The Horsefeathers.

         15 Speak        this girl’s got ammo
                                                                                                   The Granada, 9 p.m., all ages, $5 to $7

                                                                                                   DJ Nick Reddell. Abe & Jake’s, 9 p.m., 21+, $5
                                                                                                                                                          Ghosty. Granada, 9 p.m., all ages, $5

                                                                                                                                                          First Friday’s Art Exhibits. Crossroads Art District,
                                                                                                                                                          7 p.m. to 9 p.m., all ages, FREE

Editor’s Note                                                                                      Tri Point Paradox – Jam. Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+,
                                                                                                   $4                                                     Cosmic Bowling. Jaybowl, Kansas Union, Level 1,
    I’ve been waiting tables for                     her spaghetti to the man that                                                                        11 p.m., FREE
the past six years. My first job                     demanded I fill his water glass
was at Carrabbas Italian Grill; I’d                  after every sip.


                                                                                                    Sat 9/3
come home every night singing                            So this is an official call-out
Frank Sinatra. Then there was                        to all Lawrence restaurants
that job at Applebees, enough                        and regulars. We want to shine
                                                                                                   If you are looking for a fun and free place to be on   Pretty Dirty: Opening reception for new works by
said there. Finally I landed a job                   the spotlight on your favorite,               Friday and Saturday nights, this is it. Sponsored      Nathan Rightmeier. The Olive Gallery & Art Sup-
serving tables in Overland Park at                   deserving servers, bartenders and             by SUA and Union Programs, enjoy all the bowl-         ply, 6 p.m. to 10 p.m., all ages, FREE
the Ritz Charles, a weddings and                     baristas. Send your nominations               ing, rockin’ music, and high scores (okay, so we
conference facility.                                 to jayplay2005@gmail.com and                  can’t promise you’ll bowl well...) you could want.
   Like most servers I’ve seen                       then look for them in the Bite and            Source: SUA events                                     Kansas City Renaissance Festival. KC Speedway
my fair share of customers with                      Venue sections of the magazine.                                                                      Complex, 130th St. Bonner Springs, 10 a.m. to 7
colorful    personalities;   from                    Happy nominating!                             Cosmic Bowling. Jaybowl, Kansas Union, Level 1,        p.m.
the lady who fell asleep eating                                                   — Anja Winikka   11 p.m., FREE
                                                                                                                                                          Majestic Rhythm Revue. Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+,
JAYPLAYERS                                                                                         PIMPS & HO’s Party. Granada, 9 p.m., 18+, $5 en-       $4
EDITOR        AKA THE STAR                          NOTICE TAKES NOTE OF IT                        try
Anja Winikka                                        Kathryn Anderson
                                                    James Foley
                                                                                                   Cash Prizes: $200 for best-dressed “HO,” $100 for      Hello Superworld, Anvil Chorus. The Bottleneck, 9
ASSOCIATE EDITOR             CALL HIM “WILDTHING”   Katy Humpert                                   best-dressed “PIMP”                                    p.m., all ages, FREE
Brian Wacker
                                                    VENUE      HAS THE BOOZE AND THE BEAT
                                                    Rory Flynn



                                                                                                   Sun 9/4
CLERK    GETS AROUND TOWN
Leigh Ann Foskey                                    Lindsey Ramsey
                                                    David Ruigh
DESIGNERS         MAKE PRETTY PAGES                 COPY EDITOR LOVES THE BEATLES
Becka Cremer                                        Tricia Masenthin                               “Realism and Abstraction: Six Degrees of Separa-       Smackdown Live action trivia & karaoke. The Bot-
Timothy Aaron Huston
                                                    CREATIVE CONSULTANT KNOWS A LOT                tion.” Nelson Atkins Museum of Art, through De-        tleneck, 9 p.m., 21+
                                                    Carol Holstead
PHOTOGRAPHER TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED                                                                 cember 31
Kit Leffler                                         Cover Photo:
                                                    Kit Leffler
BITE   ALWAYS HAS THE MUNCHIES                      SPEAK UP                                       TREEmendous TREEhouses. Powell Gardens, 9
Natalie Johnson                                     JUST SEND AN E-MAIL TO:
Kelsie Smith                                        jayplay@kansan.com                             a.m. to 6 p.m., $7, through October 2
                                                    or individually, the formula is:
Laura Snyder                                        (1st initial+last name@kansan.com)

CONTACT         WILL HELP YOU WITH YOUR PROBLEMS    OR WRITE TO:
                                                    Jayplay
Meghan Miller
Chris Moore
                                                    The University Daily Kansan                    Particle. Granada, 8 p.m., all ages, $16
                                                    111 Stauffer-Flint Hall
Katie Moyer                                         1435 Jayhawk Blvd.
                                                    Lawrence, KS 66045

                                                                          VOLUME 3, ISSUE 3

2| Jayplay 09.01.05
                                                                                                                                                  Where:



Weekly choice
                                                                                                                                                 Abe & Jake’s Landing
                                                                                                                                                 	 8	E.	Sixth	St.		(785)	841-5855

                                                                                                                                                 Black Dog Coffeehouse
                                                                                                                                                   12815	W.	87th	St.	Pkwy,	Lenexa,		     	
                                                                                                                                                 	 (913)-495-5515




                                  2                                            3
                                                                                                                                                 The Blue Room
                                                                                                                                                   1616	E.	18th	St.,	Kansas	City,	Mo.,		 	
                                                                                                                                                 	 (816)-474-2929

                                                                                                                                                 The Boobie Trap Bar
                                                                                                                                                   1417	SW	Sixth	St.,	Topeka.	
                                                                                                                                                 	 (785)-232-9008

                                                                                                                                                 The Bottleneck
                                                                                                                                                 	 737	New	Hampshire	St.		
                                                                                                                                                 	 (785)	841-5483

                                                                                                                                                 Davey’s Uptown Rambler’s Club




   1
                                                                                                                                                 	 3402	Main	St.		(816)	753-1909

                                                                                                                                                 El Torreon Ballroom



                                                                                           4
                                                                                                                                                    3101	Gillham	Plaza,	Kansas	City,	Mo.

                                                                                                                                                 Gaslight Tavern
                                                                                                                                                 	 317	N.	Second	St.		(785)	856-4330



   Mon 9/5                                             Tues 9/6                                          Wed 9/7
                                                                                                                                                 The Granada
                                                                                                                                                 	 1020	Massachusetts	St.
                                                                                                                                                 	 (785)	842-1390

                                                                                                                                                 Grand Emporium Saloon
In the style of Joanna Newsom and Re-           Bowling For Soup.	 Granada,	 8	 p.m.,	            On the heels of his recently-released          	 3832	Main	St.		(816)	531-1504
gina Specter, comes Anni Rossi. This            all	 ages,	 $13	 (in	 advance),	 $15	 (at	 the	   What I Really Mean album, country-
Los Angeles musician uses her viola,            door)                                             rock singer-songwriter Robert Earl Keen        Hobbs Park
Rhodes piano and uniquely beautiful                                                               brings his band and their eclectic blend       	 10th	&	Delaware	St.	(785)	749-7394
voice to create her own brand of mu-            Flashback Film:	 Gone With the Wind.              of tunes to Lawrence. Check out his offi-
sic she calls “Experimental Pop.” She is        Kansas	 Union,	 Woodruff	 Auditorium,	            cial website (http://www.robertearlkeen.       Jackpot Saloon
playing three shows in Lawrence over            Level	5,	7	p.m.,	$1                               com/) to learn more.                           	 943	Massachusetts	St.	
                                                                                                                                                 	 (785)	832-1085
two days with nine local bands. To hear
her music, go to http://www.myspace.                                                              Robert Earl Keen.	 Liberty	 Hall,	 8	 p.m.,	   Jazzhaus
com/annirossi	                                  NCAA Video Game Tournament.	 Kan-                 18+                                            	 926	1/2	Massachusetts	St.	
                                                sas	Union,	Ballroom,	11	a.m.	to	4	p.m.,	                                                         	 (785)	749-3320
Superargo, Anni Rossi, Wolf Economy,            FREE
Evan Saathoff.	 Solidarity!,	 7	p.m.,	18+,	                                                       Do you have a way with words? Or do            Kemper Arena
$3	to	$5                                                                                          you like to hear/read poetry? Readers          	 1800	Genessee	St.,	Kansas	City,	Mo.,	
	                                               The Cavaliers, Chris McFarland, Anni              have 5 minutes to read any kind of po-         	 (816)	513-4000
                                                Rossi.	 Jackpot	 Saloon	 and	 Music	 Hall,	       etry they want. Audience members will
The Armory, ID and Sleeper, River Of            10	p.m.                                           vote on their top slam poet, and prizes        Spencer Museum of Art
                                                                                                                                                 	 1300	Mississippi	St.	(785)	864-4710
Rust, Anni Rossi, DJ Konsept. The	Gas-                                                            will be awarded to 1st, 2nd and 3rd
light	Tavern,	9	p.m.,	18+,		$5                                                                    place finishers ($50, $25 and $15, re-         SUA Events
                                                Body Tone Fitness Session with Liliya.            spectively). Source: SUA events                	 www.suaevents.com
                                                Student	Recreation	Fitness	Center,	5:15	
English Alternative Theatre staged              to	6:15	p.m.,	FREE	(with	KU	ID)                                                                  Lawrence Arts Center
reading: KU students perform “Medea                                                               Poetry Slam.	 Kansas	 Union,	 Hawks	           	 940	New	Hampshire		St.	
Gets a Life” and “Oscar Gets a Pair.”	                                                            Nest,	Level	1,	7	p.m.,	FREE                    	 (785)	843-2787
Lawrence	Arts	 Center,	 8	 p.m.,	 all	 ages,	   Cardio Combat Fitness Session with
FREE                                            CJ.	 Student	 Recreation	 Fitness	 Center,	                                                      Lawrence Public Library
                                                6:30	to	7:30	p.m.,	FREE	(with	KU	ID)              That Acoustic Jam Thing.	Jazzhaus,	10	         	 707	Vermont	St.		(785)	843-3833
                                                                                                  p.m.,	21+,	$2
                                                                                                                                                 Lawrence Visitor Center
Last night at the pool. Lawrence	Pool,	1	                                                                                                        	 402	N.	Second	St.		(785)	965-4499
p.m.	to	8:45	p.m.,	$3.75	for	adults
                                                                                                  Hard Core Troubadours, Bowman, Hot-            Liberty Hall
                                                                                                  Vegas, Mike Borgia, The Starrs, Ex             	 642	Massachusetts	St.		
                                                                                                  AntiFreeze.	 Davey’s	 Uptown	 Rambler’s	       	 (785)	749-1912
                                                                                                  Club,	21+	
                                                                                                                                                 The Lied Center
                                                                                                                                                 	 West	Campus		(785)	864-2787

                                                                                                                                                 The Replay Lounge
                                                                                                                                                 	 946	Massachusetts	St.	
                                                                                                                                                 	 (785)	749-7676

                                                                                                                                                 Verizon Amphitheater
1. Art by Nathan Rightmeier
                                                                                                                                                 	 33	N.	130th	St.		(913)	721-3400
2.Tri Point Paradox
3. Particle 4. Gone With the Wind

                                                                                                                                                         09.01.05 Jayplay |3
              No
venue




                                                     purchase
                                                     necessary
                                                         Street musicians provide the fun, free
                                                         soundtrack of our lives
                                                     By Dave Ruigh, Jayplay writer
                                                     	 On	Massachusetts	Street,	the	bustling	             street	musicians	in	Lawrence	prefer	the	
                                                     patchwork	 of	 life	 and	 culture	 that	 de-         four-block	stretch	of	Mass.	Street	pave-
                                                     fines	 downtown	 Lawrence,	 few	 things	             ment	 between	 7th	 and	 10th	 Streets.	           	
                                                     can	 be	 guaranteed	 or	 predicted.	 	The	           Three	 of	 the	 most	 popular	 places	 to	
                                                     cultural	tectonics	shift	daily.		But	for	de-         play	are	in	the	alley	next	to	the	Antique	
                                                     cades,	street	musicians	—	their	names	               Mall;	the	wide	expanse	in	front	of	U.S.	
                                                     and	 faces	 always	 changing	 —	 have	               Bank,	 900	 Mass.	 St.;	 and	 on	 the	 cor-
                                                     been	one	of	the	most	familiar	and	reli-              ner	of	7th	Street.	These	venues	receive	
                                                     able	aspects	of	the	landscape.		                     heavy	pedestrian	traffic	and	have	mod-
                                                     	 Known	traditionally	as	buskers,	street	            erately	 comfortable	 seating	 (insofar	 as	
                                                     musicians	have	historical	roots	stretch-             concrete	can	be	deemed	comfortable).		
                                                     ing	as	far	back	as	the	12th-	and	13th-	cen-          Ignored	or	avoided	by	some	when	play-
                                                     tury	French	troubadours	and	trouveres,	              ing	 these	 ad	 hoc	 venues,	 street	 musi-
                                                     the	traveling	poet-musicians	of	the	day,	            cians	exist	as	a	living	soundtrack	in	the	
                                                     says	Doug	Harvey,	a	performing	musi-                 lives	of	others.		
                                                     cian	and	adjunct	professor	of	history	at	            			“It’s	for	people	who	can’t	afford	to	go	
                                                     Johnson	 County	 Community	 College.	                                                    ”
                                                                                                          to	the	bar	and	buy	the	beer, 	says	Tara	
                                                     Today’s	 street	 musicians	 are	 generally	          O’Brien,	 JCCC	 sophomore,	 stopping	
                                                     found	 in	 college	 towns	 like	 Lawrence	           and	 listening	 to	 Butler	 play.	 	“It	 shows	
                                                     and	large	cities	across	the	country.			              how	 much	 music	 is	 in	 this	 town	 and	
                                                     	 	 	 Musical	 street	 performance,	 or	 bus-        how	much	people	love	it.       ”
                                                     king,	 has	 traditionally	 been	 seen	 as	 a	        	 Because	street	musicians	have	played	
                                                     moneymaking	 enterprise,	 but	 the	 in-              on	Mass.	Street	for	so	long,	by	default,	
                                                     tentions	 of	 Lawrence	 street	 musicians	           they	have	helped	shape	the	character	of	
                                                     are	 as	 varied	 as	 their	 instruments	 and	        downtown	Lawrence	and	distinguished	
                                                     style.		                                             it	 from	 the	 rest	 of	 the	 city.	 	 Larry	 Bill-
                                                     			“Some	folks	are	playing	to	get	spare	             ings,	 owner	 of	 the	 Antique	 Mall,	 says	
                                                     change,	other	people	play	because	they	              that	 when	 street	 musicians	 play,	 they	
                                                                    ”
                                                     like	 to	 play, 	 says	 Brad	 Butler,	 a	 slight,	   give	 downtown	“a	 different	 kind	 of	 at-
                                                     dread-locked	man	noodling	on	a	classi-               mosphere	—	a	carnival	atmosphere. 	           ”
                                                     cal	guitar	during	an	unseasonably	cool	              	 But	this	is	far	from	the	Golden	Age	of	
                                                     Sunday	afternoon	in	a	cozy	alcove	next	              street	musicians	in	Lawrence.		Billings,	
                                                     to	the	Antique	Mall,	830	Mass.	St.		                 who	has	owned	the	Antique	Mall	for	14	
                                                     	 But	 because	 some	 street	 musicians	             years,	 says	 street	 musicians	 don’t	 ap-
                                                     here	accept	tips,	their	playing	is	some-             pear	 outside	 his	 storefront	 as	 often	 as	
                                                     times	 perceived	 as	 invasive	 entertain-           they	once	did.		Musicians	used	to	show	
                                                     ment,	if	not	outright	begging.		For	most	            up	as	many	as	three	times	a	week.		Now	
                                                     street	musicians,	however,	the	music	is	             only	one	a	week	stops	to	play,	generally	
                                                     more	meaningful	than	mendicant.		                    on	the	weekend.		
                                                     	 	 	 “I’m	 not	 trying	 to	 scrounge	 a	 dol-       	 Harvey	says	the	nature	of	street	musi-
                                                           ”
                                                     lar, 	 says	 Chad	 Smith,	 strumming	 pop	           cians	in	America	is	cyclical,	an	ebb	and	
                                                     chords	in	the	same	alley	a	day	later.		“If	          flow	 of	 performers	 dictated	 by	 the	 so-
                                                     you	want	to	throw	a	dollar,	that’s	great.	       	   cial	 climate.	 	 And,	 Harvey	 adds,	 street	
                                                     I’m	here	to	express	myself.     ”                    musicians	in	Europe	are	more	prevalent	
                                                     	 That	 current	 of	 self-expression	 runs	          because	Europeans	are	more	accepting	
                                                     parallel	to	a	sense	of	creative	and	phys-            and	appreciative	of	the	performers	and	
                                                     ical	 freedom	 many	 of	 these	 musicians	           the	lifestyle.			
                                                     share.		Butler,	a	recent	Lawrence	trans-             	 But	as	long	as	one	musician	picks	up	
                                                     plant	 from	 Colorado	 Springs,	 Colo.,	             a	 guitar	 and	 perches	 somewhere	 on	
                                                     says	he	can	play	“under	a	tree,	under	a	             Mass.	Street,	the	tradition	here	will	con-
                                                     rock,	anywhere	I	want	—	grab	a	coffee,	              tinue.		
                                                     pick	a	spot	and	sit	for	a	bit.  ”                    	 	 	 “It’s	 something	 people	 have	 always	
                                                     	 Though	the	possibility	of	playing	un-                       ”
                                                                                                          done, 	 says	 Smith.	 “Someone	 will	 al-
                                                     der	a	tree	or	rock	exists	in	theory,	most	           ways	be	playing	downtown.          ”
                     Illustration	by	Brock	Potucek

4|Jayplay 09.01.05
                                                                              venue
                    Replay Lounge
                    801 New Hampshire St.




                     As one walks down Massachusetts Street, he or she might wonder
                  what lurks behind the purple neon-lit sign of the Replay Lounge. The
                  atmosphere of the Replay often contradicts its grungy allure.
                     “The Replay has a bit of the Cheers syndrome, if you’re a regular,
                  everyone knows your name,” bartender, Joe Montgomery says.
                     The Replay Lounge plays host to some of the more obscure bands
                  touring the country and is known to attract acts from all over the states.
                  Cover is never more than $2 for any of the live shows.
                     One of the unique aspects of the Replay Lounge is its back patio, which
                  before the smoking ban hit Lawrence, was the only outdoor patio of its
                  size in downtown Lawrence. Another thing that makes the Replay Lounge
                  unique, says Montgomery, is the lack of cleanliness in the bathrooms,
                  which the Replay Lounge seems to be quite proud of. “The Replay has,
                  without a doubt, the shittiest bathrooms around,” says Montgomery.
                     Fridays and Saturdays are your best bet. At the Replay Lounge, one
                  can play free pinball on any of the six pinball machines from 3 p.m. to
                  6 p.m., while sipping the Replay’s patrons’ drink of choice, Pabst Blue
                  Ribbon cans (only $1.50 every day).
                                                                               —Rory Flynn




 B
                                     Aaron Blair




French Martini
                                   artender
                                   of the week
 1 1/2 oz vodka (Blair recom-
 mends vanilla vodka)                  It is Henry’s on Eighth’s diverse atmosphere and
 1/4 oz Chambord raspberry          Aaron Blair’s meetings with many random people that
 liqueur                            keeps this Leavenworth senior working every Mon-
 1/4 oz fresh pineapple juice       day, Sunday and Tuesday night. Blair recalled one of
 1 twist lemon peel                 the strangest men he has encountered during his two
                                    year tenure at Henry’s. An Alaskan man named LK, who
 Pour each of the above into a      comes in about twice a month to drink and tell stories,
 tall bar glass. Shake with ice,    told Aaron a story about shooting an arrow at a bear
 pour into a cocktail or martini    while hunting and then watching the bear swat the
 glass and serve.                   arrow away. If you like stories, Henry’s patron’s have
                                    plenty. So go there to listen to stories and Blair’s choice
                                    of “mushroom jazz.” And have a French Martini, Blair’s
                                    favorite drink to make.
                                                                          —Lindsey Ramsey




                                                          09.01.05 Jayplay|5
  contact


    These eyes
       wandering
          were made for




                                                                                                                                                                             Kit	Leffler/	Jayplay	photographer

And that’s just what they’ll do                                                                                                                             Models Dusty Mills, left, Mandi Sumner, Wa-
                                                                                                                                                            Keeney senior, and Tom Kimmel, Lawrence
By Meghan Miller, Jayplay writer                                                                                                                            sophomore, share a couch and eye contact.

	 It’s	 Thursday	 night	 and	 Kristin	 We-           essarily	 signify	 the	 beginning	 of	 the	        tions.		Schwartz	says	the	whole	scenario	           need	 addressing.	 	 Flirtatious	 behavior	
sche,	 Raleigh,	 N.C.,	 sophomore	 is	 get-          end.	And	 it	 doesn’t	 have	 to	 mean	 that	       has	probably	been	rehearsed	over	and	               has	the	potential	of	severely	damaging	
ting	ready	to	go	out.		All	she	has	to	do	            your	 partner	 is	 cheating	 either.	 	 So	 is	    over	 in	 his	 mind,	 so	 he’s	 prepared	 for	      a	 relationship.	 	 Kuriansky	 says	 that,	 in	
is	take	a	shower,	fix	her	hair,	throw	on	            it	 something	 that	 needs	 to	 be	 talked	        just	about	any	response	you’ll	have.                some	cases,	a	flirting	mate	can	be	just	
a	 little	 makeup,	 and	 then	 it’s	 off	 to	 her	   about,	 or	 can	 you	 just	 leave	 it	 alone?		                                                        as	hurtful	as	a	cheating	one.		And	if	your	
closet	to	rummage	for	the	perfect	outfit.	       	   You’ve	 heard	 repeatedly	 how	 impor-                     Universal eye wandering                     partner	 catches	 you,	 be	 prepared.	 	 It	
After	a	little	lip	gloss,	she’s	ready.		She’s	       tant	 communication	 is	 to	 any	 relation-        	 But	 it’s	 not	 just	 men	 with	 eyes	 that	      could	cause	more	pain	than	the	flirting	
                                        T
not	going	out	on	a	date	though.		 onight	            ship.		Now’s	the	time	to	put	that	advice	          roam.		Women	do	it,	too.		And	how	does	             was	worth.	
she’ll	 be	 out	 with	 her	 friends,	 so	 she	       to	work.		Roving	eyes	should	raise	red	            it	 feel	 when	 someone	 is	 ogling	 your	
won’t	 have	 to	 worry	 about	 her	 suitor’s	        flags	 because	 what	 starts	 out	 as	 inno-       mate?	 	 How	 do	 you	 think	 that	 dancing	                  Knowing your partner,
wandering	eyes.		Wesche	says	she’s	for-              cent	 ogling	 could	 turn	 into	 something	        queen’s	boyfriend	feels	when	every	eye	                           knowing yourself
tunate	to	have	not	had	a	boyfriend	that	             bigger	if	left	unchecked.		It’s	time	for	a	        in	the	bar	is	scanning	every	inch	of	his	           	 Remember	 that	 communication	 is	
stared	 at	 other	 girls	 while	 they	 were	         heart-to-heart	with	your	partner.		                girlfriend’s	bare	skin?		You	know	what	I	           key.		Talk	to	your	partner	if	you	witness	
out	together.		That	type	of	behavior,	she	                                                              mean.		You	have	that	friend,	or	you	are	            questionable	 behaviors.	 	 And	 if	 you’re	
says,	would	really	piss	her	off.		Wesche	                  Practice, practice, practice                 that	 friend,	 that	 will	 opt	 for	 a	 tighter	    the	 one	 sneaking	 peeks	 or	 flirting	 with	
says	 that	 if	 a	 guy	 is	 out	 with	 her,	 she	    	 Understandably,	 you	 are	 concerned	            shirt	or	a	shorter	skirt,	knowing	it’s	sure	        your	best	friend’s	boyfriend	when	she’s	
should	be	the	center	of	his	attention.		If	          about	 those	 wandering	 eyes,	 so	 you	           to	 grab	 ample	 attention	 when	 you	 go	          not	looking,	question	your	own	behav-
he	wants	to	stare	at	other	girls,	then	he	           question	 your	 boyfriend	 about	 it.	 	 He	       out.	 	This	 is	 part	 of	 the	 friendly	 —	 and	   ior.				
should	be	dating	them	instead.                       gives	 you	 some	 sweet	 line	 about	 how	         sometimes	dangerous	—	sport	of	flirta-              	 People	who	put	up	with	roaming	eyes	
	 Not	 all	 of	 us	 have	 been	 as	 lucky	 as	       you’re	 the	 one	 he’s	 with	 and	 that	 the	      tion.                                               or	 a	 flirtatious	 mate	 sometimes	 let	 the	
Wesche.	 	We	 know	 what	 it’s	 like	 to	 ex-        other	 girl	 is	 nothing	 but	 trash.	 	 Daylle	   	 Judy	Kuriansky	says	in	her	book	The               behavior	slide	in	the	name	of	love.		Vic-
perience	 the	 horrors	 of	 a	 mate	 with	 a	        Deanna	 Schwartz	 says	 in	 her	 book	 All         Complete Idiot’s Guide to a Healthy Re-             tims	 of	 cheaters	 often	 stay	 with	 their	
wandering	set	of	eyes.		It	can	leave	you	            Men Are Jerks*: *Until Proven Other-               lationship	 that	 both	 men	 and	 women	            lover	 for	 the	 same	 reason.	 	 It’s	 time	 to	
feeling	 resentful,	 insecure	 and	 embar-           wise	 that	 cheating	 men	 have	 their	 re-        are	guilty	of	flirting.		Even	if	the	flirting	      stop	the	insanity.		No	longer	can	we	al-
rassed.		Even	worse,	it	could	be	a	sign	             sponses	rehearsed	and	ready.		Schwartz	            seems	harmless,	it	can	still	raise	ques-            low	 ourselves	 to	 be	 walked	 all	 over	 in	
that	 your	 partner	 might	 be	 cheating	 or	        also	says	that	“these	professional	jerks	          tions	 about	 faithfulness	 on	 down	 the	          the	name	of	love.		We	need	to	take	note	
contemplating	the	dirty	deed.                        are	 like	 fishermen”	 using	 bait,	 such	 as	     line.		Flirting,	innocent	or	not,	could	be	         of	these	possible	precursors	to	cheating	
	 But	 slow	 down.	 	When	 your	 partner	            eye	 wandering,	 to	 test	 the	 waters	 so	        sending	 you	 a	 clue	 that	 your	 partner	         so	we	can	nip	the	problem	in	the	bud.
checks	other	people	out,	it	doesn’t	nec-             they	 can	 gauge	 their	 partners’	 reac-          has	issues	within	your	relationship	that	




6|Jayplay 09.01.05
Bitch                                                                               &
                                                                                                                                                                    contact




moan                 With Brian Bratichak and Jessica Crowder


                                                                                                                                              ?
                                                                                                                                                            What	 are	 some	
                                                                                                                                                            sure-fire	 ways	 to	
                                                                                                                                                            tell	 if	 a	 girl	 has	 had	




?
                                                                                                                                                            an	orgasm?	
                                             is very normal, actually. When we’re                en will find men who are working out or                                    —	Chuck,	
                                             ticked off, our arousal levels sky rocket           are playing a sport more attractive than                                  Freshman
             Why	 is	 that	 my	 boy-         and in the presence of attractive visual            if he were just in his normal clothes. An-
             friend	 always	 looks	          stimuli, we end up wanting to jump our              other reason you might find us hotter is
             hottest	when	we	are	            significant others. Logic tells us to be            because we actually have the power to        Jessica: I’m going to break the female
             fighting?	                      angry, but our animal instinct tells us to          make ourselves hotter when we know           honor code here and let you men in on
                 —
                 	 	Melinda,	Junior          pounce. I say multi-task: blow off some             we have done something wrong. It’s           the secrets of our mystifying orgasms.
                                             steam AND let out that animal.                      just a huge self-defense mechanism.          Though there really aren’t any sure-fire
                                                                                                 We know that you are madder than hell        ways other than honest, open commu-
Jessica: Ahhhh! Don’t you hate it when       Brian: You may be surprised to learn                at us, but if we make ourselves hotter,      nication, there are some physical cues
you’re fuming because of something he        this, but men are actually genetically              then you won’t be able to resist our         you can look for: if she’s fair-skinned, her
did or didn’t do, yet you’re fixated on      engineered so that when our testoster-              good looks.                                  chest and cheeks may flush noticeably;
how freaking foxy he looks with his five     one levels rise, we become more attrac-                                                          she may break out in a sudden sweat all
o’clock shadow and shaggy hair? This         tive. This would also explain why wom-                                                           over her body; her breathing may quick-
                                                                                                                                              en, you might hear noises you thought
                                                                                                                                              only elephants could make; and lastly,
                                                                                                                                              you can usually feel her muscles con-




?
                                                                                                                                              tract when she climaxes. These should
                                                                                                 you currently have, but try and hang out     help tip you off.
             My	boyfriend	and	I	recently	broke	up,	but	we	share	most	of	                         with only your closest girls. Get togeth-
             the	same	friends	so	we	see	each	other	very	often.	It’s	un-                          er with three other friends and go to        Brian: From what I’ve learned, there
             comfortable	seeing	him	so	much.	Should	I	try	to	find	new	                           the movies. When you are trapped with        seems to be no definitive way to tell
             friends?	                                                                           hanging out with Mr. X, just keep your       if a girl has orgasmed. While it’s very
                                                    —	Katy,	Sophomore                            distance from him so that you don’t          simple to tell when a guy is reaching
                                                                                                 have to worry about what he’s doing.         his peak, each and every woman has
                                                                                                 Stay on the other side of the room, talk     different signs or ways of telling. The
Jessica: For future reference, it’s always   it so that you can eventually establish a           in a different group or go for a food run    easiest way to tell if a girl came is to
wise to have separate groups of friends,     new network of friends.                             with all of your chronically high bud-       build up a strong trust between each
along with some mutual ones so you                                                               dies. Give the breakup a little time and     other. That way when she tells you that
can hang out with your shared friends        Brian:	 This seems to be one of the                 maybe you and he can just have general       you did your job, you will believe her.
together or your own friend separately.      biggest issues I’ve heard concerning                conversation. If that doesn’t seem pos-      And don’t think you can tell just by how




                                                                                                                 5
I recommend forging some new friend-         friends dating. I see two different paths           sible, tell everyone a rumor about how       much noise she makes. Just remember
ships to avoid the consistently awkward      you can take. First, try and rekindle               much trash he talked on all of them be-      how “real” Meg Ryan’s impression was
rendezvous with your ex. It’s really just    some of those old friendships you have              hind their backs when you were dating.       in When Harry Met Sally. I have a feel-
a matter of moving beyond the old rela-      let go astray. The other way you could              That should help get him out of your life    ing that is the best orgasm Billy Crystal
tionship and the people associated with      go would be to keep the same friends                involving your friends.                      ever gave to a woman.




How we met
                                                                                                                                                             worst things to say to

                                                                                                                            Top five                         someone the
                                                                                                                                                             morning after:
                                                                                                                                                             	 .	“I’ve	had	better.”
                                                                                                                                                             5

                                             Friends: Shanna & Dara                                                                                          4.	“What’s	that	smell?”
                                             	 It	all	began	at	work.	Dara	Haynes,	Topeka	junior,	was	working	at	
                                             Googles	of	Fun,	4931	W.	Sixth	St.,	a	Chuck	E.	Cheese-like	edu-tain-
                                                                                                                                                             3.		“Oops!”
                                                                                                                        	
                                             ment	 place.	 Shanna	 Todd,	 Pretty	 Prairie	 senior,	 was	 the	 new	 girl.	
                                             Dara	 says	 that	 Shanna	 was	 talkative	 and	 outgoing,	 and	 the	 two	
                                                                                                                                                                “
                                                                                                                                                             2.		 How	 much	 do	 I	 owe	
                                             started	 up	 a	 conversation.	 Then	 Shanna	 invited	 her	 to	 a	 birthday	
                                                                                                                                                                you?”
                                             party.	They	had	a	great	time	and	so	they	started	hanging	out	on	a	
                                             regular	basis.	Neither	of	them	had	ever	been	a	fan	of	flying	solo;	they	
                                                                                                                                                                “
                                                                                                                                                             1.		 What	 did	 you	 say	 your	
                                             say	it’s	great	going	out	together	because	they	act	as	one	another’s	
                                                                                                                                                                name	was	again?”
                                             wingman.	 Now	 they’ve	 been	 friends	 for	 roughly	 a	 year	 and	 a	 half	
                                                                                                                                                                            —	Katie	Moyer
                                             and	you’ll	hardly	ever	see	one	without	the	other.

                                                                                                                                                      09.01.05 Jayplay|7
                                             	 	         	        	         	        	          	          	
                                                                                                      —	Chris	Moore
B
 Why you check your                               sages	for	entertainment.	
                                                  	 “You	know	people	are	going	to	read	
                                                                                                different	way,”	he	says.                    turn ourselves around?”
                                                                                                                                            	 Employees	 in	 Thomas’	 office	 use	
 friends’ away mes-                               them	and	you	have	to	say	something	                    From the beginning                 away	 messages	 to	 say	 where	 they	
 sages and what it                                humorous,”	she	says.                          	 “Well, I updated my buddy list…I          are,	the	best	way	to	reach	them	and	
                                                  	 Jeff	Daniels,	Overland	Park	sopho- used to have 152 total buddies, now                  when	 they	 will	 be	 available.	 “If	 you	
 means to be “in the                              more,	uses	away	messages	to	keep	 I’m down to 88…sad sad day… if you                      are	on	deadline,	you	know	that	your
 circle”                                          up	with	his	friends.                                 want to be on the list and u are     away	message	will	take	care	of	peo-
                                                  	 “I	 check	 them	 to	 see	                              afraid you might have been       ple	for	awhile.”	
  By Dani Litt, Jayplay writer
                                                  where	 they	 are	 and	                                      removed, please IM me
  “Be right back”                                 what	 they	 are	 doing,”	
     “At class, leave me a message”               he	says.	“And	to	see	
                                                                                “I	check	them	to	see	 and plead your case.
                                                                                                                 Thanks”
                                                                                                                                               Making communication easier
                                                                                                                                            	 “So far away I bet you can’t find
     “I’m out, call my cell”                      if	there	are	any	fun-          where	they	are	and	 	 Away	 messages	                      me!”
  	 At	first,	away	messages	functioned	 ny	quotes.”                            what	they	are	doing.”	 have	 been	 part	 of	                 	 Daniels	and	Kanterman	both	agree	
  like	 a	 note	 on	 a	 storekeeper’s	 door:	                                                                     the	instant	message	      that	 away	 messages	 are	 a	 good,	
  three	 or	 four	 words	 to	 tell	 visitors	 to	      In the know
                                                                                     —	Jeff	Daniels,	             package	 since	 the	      quick	 way	 to	 communicate	 with	 oth-
  wait	 or	 come	 back	 later.	 But	 among	 	 “I hate spring                             sophomore               beginning.	                ers.	 “Think	 of	 how	 much	 you	 know
  computer	 savvy	 college	 kids,	 they	 break. Everyone signs                                                  	 In	 1996,	 America	       about	 people	 through	 away	 mes-
  have	become	much	more.                          offline and I am no lon-                                    Online	 introduced	 the	      sages	that	you	wouldn’t	know	other-
  	 Today,	 students	 leave	 away	 mes- ger continuously updated                                           instant	 messaging	 pro-         wise,”	 Kanterman	 says.	 “They	 bring	
  sages	 to	 pass	 along	 their	 daily	 and	 on my friends daily activities                            gram	 for	 subscribers	 only.	 It	   us	 closer	 and	 keep	 us	 in	 touch	 at	 a	
  weekly	 schedules,	 tell	 funny	 anec- which I have grown so accustom to became	so	popular	that	the	company	                              time	when	not	a	lot	of	people	want	to	
  dotes	and	share	favorite	quotes	from	 reading several times daily.”                           put	 AOL	 Instant	 Messenger	 on	 the	      pick	up	a	phone.”
  the	latest	books	and	movies.                    	 People	 often	 have	 a	 lot	 of	 bud- Web	for	non-members	in	May	1997,	                 	 But	how	many	people	do	they	really	
  	 “Production meeting, class, work, dies	 on	 their	 list,	 but	 not	 all	 of	 them	 says	 Krista	 Thomas,	 senior	 director	             communicate	with	on	a	list	that	holds	
  another meeting, rehearsal, back are	 close	 friends.	 Away	 messages	 for	 AOL	 corporate	 communications.	                              a	maximum	of	250	screen	names?
  way later, peace”                               can	mean	different	things	to	different	 AIM	can	be	downloaded	for	free	us-                	 Kanterman	 has	 130	 buddies	 on	
     “TYLENOL COLD…where have readers.	Being	able	to	understand	an	 ing	any	Internet	server.                                                her	list;	she	talks	to	only	10	percent	
  you been my entire life?!”                      away	message	gives	people	a	sense	 	 The	 program	 allows	 users	 to	 chat	               of	 them.	 But	 she	 reads	 everyone’s	
     “I’m in advertising, I don’t lie, I sell.” of	belonging;	it	also	shows	they	have	 online	using	instant	messages	and	to	                away	messages.	“I	have	a	lot	of	peo-
  -Picture Perfect                                a	 close	 relationship	 with	 the	 person	 and	to	post	an	away	message	if	the	            ple	on	my	list	from	high	school	that	I
  	 Experts	say	away	messages	have	 who	wrote	it,	says	Jacobson.	“It	says	 user	is	away	from	his	computer.	“It’s	                           don’t	talk	to	anymore,”	she	says.	“But
  become	 a	 new	 form	 of	 communica- something	 about	 where	 you	 are	 in	 like	a	social	contract.	You	promise	a	                        I	learned	where	an	old	friend	goes	to
  tion	and	a	new	way	to	feel	connected;	 the	social	circle.”	                                   presence	 by	 saying	 you	 are	 online,”	   college	from	reading	her	away	mes-
  we	want	to	be	in	the	loop.                      	 In	 one	 study	 done	 in	 Jacobson’s	 Thomas	 says.	 “If	 you’re	 going	 to	 be	        sage.”
  	 “In	 some	 ways	 it’s	 like	 gossiping,”	 “Virtual	 Communities”	 course,	 a	 stu- on	the	list	as	a	presence,	you	owe	it	               	 Not	all	students	find	away	messag-
  says	 David	 Jacobson,	 professor	 of	 dent	 posted	 an	 away	 message	 and	 to	the	person	to	say	where	you	are	or	                       es	to	be	as	exciting	and	informative.	
  anthropology	 at	 Brandeis	 University	 asked	 several	 people	 to	 read	 and	 when	you’ll	be	back.”                                      Some	choose	to	stick	to	the	phone.
  in	Waltham,	Mass.	“When	you	are	in- interpret	 it.	 The	 message	 simply	 	 Shortly	 after	 the	 introduction	 of	                        	 “I	get	too	stressed	out,”	says	Jes-
  side	the	circle,	you	know	the	gossip,	 read,	 “sex.”	 Jacobson	 says,	 “Guys	 AIM,	 other	 companies,	 such	 as	 Ya-                      sica	Gerrick,	Ft.	Worth,	Texas	sopho-
  but	 if	 you	 are	 excluded	 it	 is	 a	 state- who	didn’t	know	her	looked	at	it	and	 hoo!	 and	 MSN,	 began	 offering	 the	               more.	“Too	many	random	people	IM
  ment	about	your	social	status.”                 thought	 maybe	 she’s	interested.	But	 same	type	of	messaging.	Today,	AIM	                you,	 and	 it	 just	 distracts	 from	 other
             	 Jill	 Kanterman,	 St.	 Louis,	 women	 who	 knew	 her	 immediately	 has	 more	 than	 35	 million	 active	 us-                 things.	I’d	rather	pick	up	a	phone.”
                        Mo.,	 sophomore,	 said	 ‘she’s	 watching	 Sex	 and	 the	 ers,	 according	 to	 www.corp.col.com.	                    	 Selena	Self,	Norman,	Neb.,	sopho-
                               uses	 away	 City,’	 which	 is	 what	 she	 intended	 by	 The	 service	 is	 also	 available	 on	 cell	         more,	used	to	use	AIM	in	high	school,	
                                       m e s - the	message.”                                    phones	 through	 companies	 like	           but	sticks	to	her	cell	phone	now	that
                                                  	 Of	the	74	people	on	his	buddy	list,	 Sprint,	AT&T/Cingular	and	Verizon.	                she	 is	 in	 college.	 “I	 came	 to	 KU	 to
                                                  Daniels	says	about	55	of	them	would	 	 Thomas	says	the	company	has	be-                    get	away	from	high	school	and	meet
                                                     know	he	is	playing	the	drums	when	 come	aware	of	the	popularity	of	away	               new	people.	And	IM	for	me	is	kind	of
                                                        he	 puts	 up	 a	 quote	 from	 the	 messages	 on	 college	 campuses	                 a	link	back	to	high	school,”	she	says.
                                                           movie	Drumline.                      through	focus	groups	and	market	re-         “I	wanted	to	sever	that	link	from	high


                                 Away
 ckie, if you read this, call                                 	       Jacobson	 says	 if	 search.	“People	tell	us	they	are	leav-            school	 and	 be	 independent.”	 Self
                                                                 students	read	messages	 ing	 quotes	 from	 the	 book	 they	 are	           says	that	away	messages	may	make
 eryone else, I’m in class.                                        and	 don’t	 understand	 reading	 or	 their	 favorite	 movie,”	 she	      it	easier	to	express	yourself,	but	she
  s worse than when I                                                them,	 they	 still	 says.	 “We	 hear	 a	 lot	 about	 college	          sees	a	downside	to	using	AIM.	“You
  king. Then I am going HOME!
  dog
                                                                       won’t	 feel	 includ- students	 leaving	 funny	 away	 mes-            can’t	 hear	 the	 voice	 and	 you	 never
 from the computer right now.                                            ed.	 “Away	 mes- sages.”                                           really	 know	 if	 their	 reaction	 to	 what
m the computer right now.
 e to
                                                                           sages	 don’t	 so	 	 The	 use	 of	 away	 messages	 has	
                                                                            much	change	 crept	 into	 the	 workplace	 too.	 Thom-
                                                                                                                                            you	say	is	true	or	not.”
                                                                                                                                            	 Misinterpretation	 is	 something
                             Happy Birthday Lizzie!!!
y. When I am                                                                  p e o p l e ’ s	 as	 uses	 them	 to	 keep	 in	 touch	 with	   Jacobson’s	 classes	 have	 studied	 as


                                      Away
                                                                               social	 rela- journalists.	She	has	250	buddies	on	           well.	 He	 suggests	 people	 take	 the
 IMs. STOP IMING                                                                 tionships,	 her	buddy	list,	the	maximum	number	            conversation	offline	if	what	they	have
                                                                                  but	 they	 allowed.	Her	favorite	away	message	            to	 say	 is	 personal	 and	 would	 cause
y from the computer right now.

Away
 I say I am away?
                                                                                   express	 is	 by	 Ryan	 Nariane,	 a	 reporter	 for	       problems	 if	 misunderstood.	 Away
                                                                                    i n c l u - eWeek.com.                                  messages	 are	 meant	 for	 a	 specific
                                                                                     s i o n	 	 “Right now I’m having amnesia and           audience,	 he	 says.	 “People	 aren’t
                                                                                      a n d	 déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve         going	to	say	things	wildly	outlandish
                                                                                      exclu- forgotten this before.”                        because	they	could	be	held	account-

  8|Jayplay 09.01.05                                                                   s i o n	    “What if the hokey pokey really IS
                                                                                       in	 a	 what it’s all about? Will we all have to
                                                                                                                                            able	 whereas	 people	 in	 chat	 rooms	
                                                                                                                                            say	nasty	things	because	they	know	
they can’t be held accountable.”            Photo illustration by Becka Cremer
   Susan Gauch, professor of com-
puter science at the University of
Kansas, focuses on Internet safety,
and as a parent, she sees other po-
tential problems.
   “People reveal more than they re-
alize in away messages,” she says.
“They mention activities, their school,
and even if there is no name or num-
ber, they can still be found.”

        A staple in communication
   “I’ll be back soon”
   Students’ addictions to away mes-
sages may not be cured soon, but
Jacobson doesn’t think it’s a bad
thing. Initial skeptics worried that on-
line communication would undermine
face-to-face conversations, he says.
But if it does anything, it supplements
face-to-face communication. “They
had the same initial concern about
the phone or the telegraph, but now
people would never say that and
we’re getting to that point with the In-
ternet,” he says.
   The number of people who use
away messages after college drops
dramatically, Jacobson says, when
they get caught up in socializing and
work.
   But that may be changing, too.
   “I use them to express creativity,”
says Tracy Davis, KU alumna. “And
also to show people that I am doing
something.” She has about 200 bud-
dies on her list. Away messages help
Davis stay in touch with friends from
other states. It also improves her com-
munication with people she wouldn’t
regularly talk to on the phone.
   Davis, an independent contractor
for event planning in Dallas, Texas,
doesn’t think age matters when it
comes to using away messages. “I
think it just depends on how busy you
are,” she says. “I mean my sister will
use it and she’s 25.”
   “In the room, just not staring at the
screen waiting for you to IM be b/c I
would just be disappointed… since,
clearly you are reading my away
message instead of Iming me :-D”




                                           09.01.05 Jayplay|9
bite



         Baby
          got
        snacks      The craft of covert
                   consumption in class
                                                                                        Move your hand casually.              Bring the food to your            Chew slowly. Don’t open
                                                                                             Don’t fumble.                   mouth. Scratch your chin.               your mouth.
                                                                                                                                                                    Illustration	by	Benjamin	Smith
By Natalie Johnson, Jayplay writer
	 My	high	school	friend	Chad	holds	the	         can’t	snack.	Pack	the	right	food	the	right	         bilities.		Go	back	to	the	baggies	of	food	        pocket	 will	 suffice	 for	 non-gelatinous	
title	for	the	greatest	food-in-class	scam	      way,	 eat	 it	 with	 the	 right	 moves	 and	        that	moms	pack.		Now	think	of	how	the	            snacks.	 	 	The	 smaller	 pockets	 on	 book	
ever.		He	sat	beside	me	in	sophomore	bi-        you’ll	be	on	your	way	to	snacking	AND	              infants	eat	them:		slowly,	methodically,	         bags	work	well,	too,	if	it	doesn’t	require	
ology	in	the	front	row	and,	before	class,	      learning	at	the	same	time.                          toothlessly.			Repeat.                            much	reach	to	get	at	them.			You	have	to	
he	 would	 stick	 a	 pudding	 cup	 in	 the	                                                         	 Hard	 candy	 is	 another	 great	 option	        take	into	account	the	way	you’ll	get	the	
front	left	pocket	of	his	shirt.			Through-                      The right stuff                     that	 doesn’t	 require	 much	 stealth.	 	The	     food	to	your	mouth.
out	class,	Chad	would	nonchalantly	stick	       	 Just	 because	 a	 food	 has	 crunchy	             crackling	 of	 wrappers	 can	 be	 irritating,	
his	pen	into	his	pocket	—	as	though	he	         qualities	doesn’t	mean	it	has	to	be	any	            so	 hard-candy	 eaters	 shouldn’t	 overdo	                         Nice moves
had	a	slight	nipple	itch	—	and	casually	        louder	 than	 fruit	 snacks.	 	Think	 of	 the	      it.	 	 If	 you	 must	 eat	 Jolly	 Ranchers	 in	   	 So	now	you’ve	got	a	pocketful	of	Star-
bring	it	to	his	intensely-focused	face	as	      food	that	moms	put	in	baggies	for	their	            class,	 unwrap	 them	 beforehand	 and	            bursts.			How	to	get	them	consumed?
if	amino	acids	were	just	too	complex	to	        kids	before	hauling	the	family	to	a	qui-            load	up.		A	dedicated	snacker	won’t	be	           	 The	 key	 is	 patience	 and	 subtlety.	         	
ponder	 without	 some	 good	 pen-chew-          et	 event:	 raisins,	 Cheerios,	 Goldfish	 or	      embarrassed	to	suck	an	Oreo	into	obliv-           Above	 all,	 keep	 your	 eyes	 off	 of	 what	
ing.		His	eyes	never	left	the	teacher,	and	     maybe	 even	 candy	 if	 you	 have	 a	 cool	         ion	or	spend	50	minutes	eating	a	hand-            you’re	 doing.	 	 Move	 your	 hand	 casu-
neither	did	ours,	as	we	passed	our	own	         mom.		                                              ful	of	Cheez-Its.			                              ally.	 	 Don’t	 fumble.	 	 Bring	 the	 food	 to	
pens	down	to	him.                               	 The	 foolproof	 foods	 are	 chewy:	 	 rai-                                                          your	 mouth.	 	 Scratch	 your	 chin,	 cheek	
	 To	 be	 sure,	 most	 professors	 aren’t	      sins,	 fruit	 snacks,	 bite-sized	 licorice	           Hey, give me some of your tots                 or	nose	after	the	drop-off.		Chew	slowly.	        	
as	 strict	 about	 the	 food-and-drink-pro-     pieces	 or	 any	 non-melting	 soft	 candy.	     	   	 For	the	most	efficient	storage	of	con-          Don’t	 open	 your	 mouth.	 	Appear	 to	 be	
hibited	laws	as	Catholic	school	biology	        Chocolate,	while	quiet,	also	has	a	pock-            traband	foodstuffs,	look	no	further	than	         intensely	 fascinated	 with	 whatever	 the	
teachers.		But	eating	in	class	can	still	be	    et	life	of	just	a	few	minutes	before	your	          Napoleon	Dynamite’s	tot	headquarters:	        	   professor	is	saying.		Take	notes	with	the	
an	irritation	to	both	professors	and	stu-       body	 heat	 melts	 it,	 so	 avoid	 it	 unless	                                 T
                                                                                                    his	Zubaz	cargo	pocket.		 he	cargo	pock-          innocent	hand.
dents.	David	Holmes,	professor	of	psy-          it’s	 for	 immediate	 consumption.	 	 Or	 if	       et	is	the	Ark.		It’s	big	and	it’s	subtle.		All	   	 Follow	 these	 simple	 guidelines,	 and	
chology,	says	he	doesn’t	have	much	of	          you’re	an	amphibian.                                the	 way	 down	 there,	 near	 your	 thigh.	   	   before	you	know	it,	you	won’t	be	rush-
a	problem	with	students	eating	in	class.	   	   	 Doyle	Hart,	Grinnell	junior,	points	out	          Zubaz	is	optional.		Pockets	are	the	most	         ing	 toward	 The	 Underground	 or	 the	
However,	he	does	mention	in	his	sylla-          that	 Gummi	 bears	 have	 a	 dual	 func-            valuable	weapons	in	the	food-sneaking	            Union	 in	 a	 hysterical	 burst	 of	 hunger	




                                                                                     S
bus	 each	 semester	 that	 food	 and	 drink	    tion.		                                             arsenal.	 If	 you’re	 wearing	 expensive	         after	 that	 11:30	 lecture.	 	 If	 you’re	 not	 a	
are	 prohibited.	 Jamie	 Grinsell,	 Long	       	 	 	 “If	 you	 get	 bored	 in	 class,	 you	 can	   pants	 (again,	 Zubaz	 is	 optional),	 you	       shady	 person,	 you	 may	 want	 to	 start	
Beach,	 Calif.,	 senior,	 says	 she	 hates	     make	 your	 own	 little	 love	 scene	 with	         may	 want	 to	 line	 your	 pockets	 with	 a	      with	 raisins	 or	 Skittles	 and	 work	 your	
hearing	students	“chewing	and	chomp-                     ”
                                                them, 	says	the	film	student.                       baggie	first.                                     way	up.	
ing”	during	class.                              			But	even	“loud”	foods,	like	Cheerios,	           	 Front	 pockets	 are	 required	 for	 the	        	 	 	 Don’t	 rush	 it.	 	 Before	 you	 know	 it,	
	 But	 that	 doesn’t	 mean	 the	 hungry	        Goldfish	 and	 other	 crackers	 are	 possi-         pudding	trick,	but	any	hoodie	or	 jacket	         you’ll	be	eating	Jell-O	in	the	front	row.




Recipe corner
Rava Kesari                                                                                                                 erver:
Indian dessert
                                          1) Fry the farina
                                             using     butter                                                                      of the week
                                             for 2-3 min-                                       Hillary Pfeiffer, Wichita sopho-       Favorite menu item: Spinach and
Recipe from Vandama Samala,
                                             utes.                                            more, may only have started at the       artichoke dip.
KU student
                                          2) Add the grated                                   75th Street Brewery, 3512 Clinton        Pet Peeve: Co-workers who
                                             coconut to the                                   Pkwy, a few days ago, but she’s no       don’t pre-bus their tables. (This is
Ingredients:
                                             farina and con-                                  novice in the serving world. The         server speak for clearing the table
  ½ cup milk
                                             tinue frying for 2 minutes.                      best, or at least most profitable,       throughout the meal, rather than
  1 cup farina/ Cream of Wheat
  2 tbsp butter
                                          3) Add milk and sugar to the above                  moment turning tables came this          waiting until the customers leave.        Hillary Pfeiffer
                                             mixture and stir continuously avoid-             summer. While working at a res-          Future Plans: Pfeiffer is majoring         75th Street Brewery
  ½ cup sugar
                                             ing lumps.                                       taurant in Michigan, Pfeiffer got a      in broadcast journalism at KU and
  ¼ cup grated coconut
                                          4) Add cashew nuts for garnishing.                  $50 tip on a $60 check. Nice work.       hopes to someday see herself on
  Cashews for garnishing
                                                                                              Better stop by and see what she’s        television – as a news or entertain-
                                          Serve hot.                                          got going for her.                       ment reporter.
10| Jayplay 09.01.05                                               — Laura Snyder                                                                          — Kelsie Smith
                      y ga
 notice

                           And you thought


                                                                                                                 was great     How transcendental
                                                                                                                              meditation can change
                                                                                                                                    the world




                                                                                          Kit	Leffler/	Jayplay	photographer
 By Kathryn Anderson, Jayplay writer
	 My	 mom	 was	 bitter	 when	 her	 boy-          to	 live	 life	 this	 way	 through	 transcen-     rise	 in	 IQ	 scores	 in	 students	 practicing	    bench	behind	Wescoe.	Rick	is	ultra-mel-
friend	 left	 Nebraska	 in	 1973	 to	 study	     dental	 meditation.	 And	 some	 people	           transcendental	 meditation.	 	The Jour-            low,	 hospitable	 and	 eager	 to	 share	 his	
transcendental	 meditation	 in	 Swit-            did.	 Half	 a	 century	 later,	 millions	 have	   nal of Social Behavior and Personal-               vast	 cosmic	 wisdom.	 Sitting	 “comfort-
zerland.	 She	 was	 hip,	 but	 David	 had	       jumped	 on	 the	 bandwagon	 for	 some	            ity found	that	practicing	transcendental	          ably	erect”	with	my	hands	on	my	knees,	
crossed	the	line.	I	picture	mom’s	former	        pretty	 substantial	 rewards.	 Maharishi’s	       meditation	 increased	 self-actualization	         I	 avert	 my	 eyes	 downward	 45	 degrees	
fling	 floating	 on	 a	 cloud	 over	 the	Alps	   world	plan	was	to	launch	peace	palaces,	          three	times	more	than	other	techniques.	           and	 place	 my	 tongue	 behind	 my	 front	
in	 half-lotus	 position,	 chanting	 like	 a	    centers	 where	 people	 could	 learn	 the	        And	 a	 1973	 study	 at	 the	 University	 of	      teeth,	as	instructed.	Winfrey	and	I	prac-
monk	while	his	fingers	formed	a	circle	          transcendental	meditation	technique,	in	          Kansas	found	that	inmates	at	Stillwater	           tice	 sustaining	 attention	 on	 in-breaths	
on	either	knee.	“Ohmmmmm, 	he’d	ut-”             3,000	major	cities	of	the	world.	                 Prison	 who	 utilized	 the	 facility’s	 tran-      and	out-breaths.	I	sit	with	my	feet	plant-
ter.	That’s	what	I	imagine.                                                                        scendental	 meditation	 program	 were	             ed	 on	 the	 grass,	 breathing	 slowly	 and	
	 Upon	 further	 research,	 I	 found	 that	                      Proving it                        more	 involved	 in	 prison	 activities	 and	       feeling	quite	uncomfortably	erect.	
followers	 of	 transcendental	 meditation	       	 More	 than	 600	 studies	 have	 uncov-          experienced	 reduced	 levels	 of	 anxiety.	        	 Truthfully,	 everything	 is	 a	 bit	 blurry	
make	innumerable	promises	about	the	             ered	the	scientific	truths	of	this	medita-        They	also	had	fewer	disciplinary	rule	in-          and	 an	 11:00	 class	 seemes	 suddenly	
technique.		The	list	is	long,	but	some	of	       tion	 phenomenon.	 Between	 1978	 and	            fractions	and	parole	violations.                   manageable.	 Many	 rookies	 mistake	
the	 coolest	 benefits	 include	 stress	 re-     2000,	the	results	of	47	studies	confirmed	                                                           zoning	 out	 for	 successful	 meditation.	
duction,	increased	intelligence	and	cre-         a	 	 phenomenon	 that	 was	 later	 tagged	            Sounds so good I had to try it                 Winfrey	 points	 out	 that	 meditation	 is	
ativity,	decreased	depression	and	anxi-          the	“Maharishi	Effect”  .		They	found	that	       	 The	 transcendental	 meditation	 pro-            not	 zoning	 out,	 nor	 is	 it	 relaxation.	 If	
ety,	 inner	 calm,	 happiness	 and	 more	        in	societies	with	1	percent	of	the	popu-          gram	 contains	 seven	 steps	 and	 takes	          you’re	 bored	 during	 meditation,	 you	
intimate	 relationships.	 	 Oh	 yeah,	 and	      lation	practicing	transcendental	medita-          a	 measly	 four	 to	 five	 days	 to	 learn.	 It	   aren’t	 meditating.	 Oops.	 My	 tutor	 as-
world	peace.	                                    tion,	there	was	a	measurable	downturn	            sounded	 great	 until	 I	 checked	 out	 the	       sures	me	that	it	takes	practice.
	 Perhaps	 David	 wasn’t	 smoking	 too	          in	crime	and	a	positive	change	in	com-            price	 tag	 –	 a	 whopping	 $2,500.	 After	
much	dope.	Perhaps	he	was	onto	some-             munity	cohesion.		                                a	 polite	 goodbye,	 I	 enlist	 the	 help	 of	                    Gotta try it?
thing.	Today,	 almost	 six	 million	 people	     	 Transcendental	 meditation	 is	 one	 of	        Rick	Winfrey,	a	practicing	Buddhist	and	             Meditation	is	one	of	those	things	that	
practice	 transcendental	 meditation,	 in-       the	 most	 studied	 human	 development	           Wichita	 senior	 in	 religious	 studies	 and	      shouldn’t	 be	 attempted	 without	 the	
cluding	about	a	million	Americans.			            programs	in	modern	science,	with	more	            enviromental	 engineering.	 Winfrey	               supervision	 of	 a	 grownup.	 A	 qualified	
                                                 than	200	universities	and	research	cen-           practices	 Shinay	 meditation.	 He	 says	          teacher	 is	 imperative	 for	 the	 safety	 of	
            Once upon a time                     ters	 devoting	 countless	 hours	 unravel-        Shinay means	 “calm	 abiding”	 in	 San-            your	 sanity.	The	Transcendental	 Medi-
	 His	Holiness,	Maharishi	Mahesh	Yogi,	          ing	the	truth	about	transcendental	med-           skrit.	Winfrey	explains	his	first	meditat-         tation	 Program	 holds	 lessons	 in	 Kan-
arrived	in	California	on	a	winter	day	in	        itation.	                                         ing	experience	with	the	nostalgia	of	the	          sas	 City,	 Mo.	Visit	 www.tm.org	 for	 the	
early	1959.	With	him,	he	brought	a	grand	        	 A	 National	 Institutes	 of	 Health	 study	     recently	 de-flowered.	 During	 his	 first	        skinny.	 But,	 if	 you’re	 like	 me,	 and	 see	
plan	 and,	 presumably,	 little	 luggage.	       found	 that	 patients	 who	 “ohmmmed”	            experience,	he	says	he	felt	a	strong	feel-         $2,500	as	a	year’s	rent,	visit	the	Kansas	
Maharishi’s	 plan	 was	 to	 familiarize	 the	    cross-legged	for	one	year	lowered	their	          ing	of	recognition	coupled	with	a	pair	of	                                   Y
                                                                                                                                                      Zen	Center,	1423	New	 ork	St.	Members	
world	 with	 transcendental	 meditation.	        blood	pressure	more	than	patients	who	            eyes	 that	 were	 continuously	 opening.	          of	the	center	learn	about	Zen	Buddhism	
His	 ultimate	 message?	 “Life	 is	 bliss.	      skipped	 the	 lotus	 position	 and	 simply	       Cool	enough,	I	think.	Let’s	get	started.           and	meditation	through	workshops	and	
Man	 is	 born	 to	 enjoy.	Within	 everyone	      followed	muscle	relaxation	techniques.	           	 Naturally,	 I	 had	 asked	 Rick	 to	 meet	       activities,	including	some	that	are	free,	
is	 an	 unlimited	 reservoir	 of	 energy,	 in-   	 The	Maharishi	University	of	Manage-             me	 under	 a	 tree	 on	 campus.	 However,	         held	in	this	neck	of	the	woods.		
telligence,	and	happiness. 	 ”                   ment,	 founded	 by	 —	 you	 guessed	 it	          it’s	important	to	minimize	potential	dis-
	 Maharishi	believed	people	could	learn	         —	His	Holiness	himself,	cited	an	overall	         tractions,	so	we	relocated	to	a	concrete	

12|Jayplay 09.01.05
Five questions
KU famous:
                     Libby McConnell
                                               KU not (yet) famous:
                                                                     Andrew Belgum
                                                                                             Not to scare you, but we’re eavesdrop-
                                                                                             ping on your conversations. Yes, we
                                                                                             hear everything. And then we print it.
                                                                                             But don’t worry if you say something
                                                                                                                                                                  notice


                     President of KU Slip ‘n                         Kimball, Neb., fresh-   stupid, we won’t identify you — un-
                     Slide Club                                      man                     less you owe us money or beer.
                     Little Rock, senior




                                                                                             Wescoe wit
                                                                   Q: If you had to leave
                                                                   the country right now,
                    Q: If you had to leave                         not knowing where
                    the country right now,                         you are going or
                    not knowing where                              when you’ll be back,
you are going or when you’ll be back, what     what one thing would you definitely want
one thing would you definitely want to         to have with you?
have with you?                                 A: A cell phone
A: Traveler’s Cheques
                                               Q: Glass of wine or pint of beer?
Q: Glass of wine or pint of beer?              A: Pint of beer
A: Pint of Free State beer
                                               Q: What is the most irresponsible, yet        (In bathroom)             Girl 1: How do you            Girl 1 (on phone) : I don’t
Q: What is the most irresponsible, yet         amusing thing you’ve done while under the     Girl 1: Ugh, my butt is   think we’ll do in basket-     know the total, want me
amusing thing you’ve done while under the      influence?                                    getting flat.             ball this year?               to check the receipts?
influence?                                     A: Once, I passed out and hit my head on      Girl 2: Really?           Guy 1: I don’t know...        Yeah. It’s because I had to
A: I gave my COMS 130 finals speech            the concrete and had a scar for a year.       Girl 1: Yeah, it’s gone   I’d be the happiest man       buy all of those books!
trashed. And I got an A.                                                                     flat.                     alive if we did it, but       (to her friend standing
                                               Q: If you had to give up one of your five     Girl 2: Must be from      I’m not going to get my       next to her) Ha, he’s so
Q: If you had to give up one of your five      senses, which would it be and why?            all the sex you’ve been   hopes up. Texas and           proud of me!
senses, which would it be and why?             A: Touch, I wouldn’t want to give up any of   having!                   Oklahoma are looking
A: Smell, so I wouldn’t have to smell the      my others.                                                              pretty solid this year, but
trash cans that are outside of my apart-                                                                               we only play Texas once.               — Katy Humpert
ment.                                          Q: Do penguins rock?                                                    Girl 1: Who is in the Big
                                               A: No.                                                                  12?
Q: Do penguins rock?
                                                                             —James Foley
A: Sure
 reviews




Reviews: music, game & film
 Stufjan Stevens                               The Brothers Grimm                                                       You and Me and Everyone We Know




 ØMUSIC                                                                                                                                   ƒGAME
Sufjan	Stevens                              including the Chicago skyline, Super-        asks, “What have we become, Amer-
                                                                                                                                         Big Mutha Truckers 2:
                                            man and Abraham Lincoln. Play the CD         ica?” in “Part I: ‘The Great Frontier’.... ”
Come on Feel the Illinoise                                                                                                               Truck Me Harder
∂∂∂                                         and you’ll find it to be an imaginative      Rarely will you find an album so well re-
                                                                                                                                         System: X-Box, PS2, Gamecube, PC
                                            blend. Stevens plays and layers over 20      searched: the songs immortalize Polish
                                                                                                                                         ∂
    With a name like Sufjan Stevens,        instruments for the album. He includes       Chicagoan Casimir Pulaski, Chicago se-
                                                                                                                                              If bad game titles were a criminal
this singer-songwriter instrumentalist      everything from banjos to xylophones         rial-killer John Wayne Gacy Jr., the UFO
                                                                                                                                         offense, the team behind Big Mutha
is bound to turn some heads. Add in a       to piccolos, creating an overall sound       sighting near Highland and many other
                                                                                                                                         Truckers 2: Truck Me Harder would
conceptual album based on the state of      reminiscent of The Polyphonic Spree.         interesting subjects specific to Illinois.
                                                                                                                                         probably be facing capital punishment
Illinois, and he’s sure to get attention.      Illinoise! has the happiness of The          Seven instrumentals are interspersed
                                                                                                                                         right about now. This lowly anticipated
Come on Feel the Illinoise! is Stevens’     Flaming Lips’ while mirroring Neil           between the lyricized songs, giving va-
                                                                                                                                         sequel to the former worst-titled game
second album in an attempt to create a      Young with banjo-heavy songs like            riety to the listening experience.
                                                                                                                                         ever features the same lowbrow, blue-
collection of albums about each of the                     ”
                                            “Jacksonville. If you like Iron and Wine        Simply put, this is one of the most
                                                                                                                                         collar “humor” as the original and a
50 states. Michigan, his home state, was    frontman Sam Beam’s voice, Sufjan            original albums you will hear this year.
                                                                                                                                         title twice as dumb. Oh yeah, and the
the first.                                  Stevens should be right up your alley.           Sufjan Stevens is playing at the Bot-
                                                                                                                                         gameplay remains terrible.
    Illinoise! is truly artistic from all   It has just enough of that dusty quality     tleneck Sept. 21.
                                                                                                                                            Things kick off when Ma Jackson, the
points of view. The slip cover is coat-     to complement his contemplative lyr-
                                                                                                                                         proprietor of the trucking company, Big
ed with images specific to the state        ics. And contemplative they are, as he                                  —Kelsey Coon
                                                                                                                                         Mutha Truckers, is thrown in jail for tax
                                                                                                                                         evasion. Elaborating on the story from
Limbeck                                     stick to the same formula of upbeat          down song with some interesting per-            here is pointless. I may as well detail the
Let Me Come Home                            tempos and sharing stories of the road.      cussion and country-style piano.                plotline of my last bathroom break.
∂∂                                          Some of the songs are spiced up with             “Sin City” also stands out with its              In order to free Ma Jackson, players
                                            added instrumentals, from piano, man-        slower tempo, rising guitar chords and          take control of one of four truckers and
  Limbeck’s previous album, Hi Every-       dolin and even an accordion. It does         harmonica parts. “Making The Rounds”            undergo a number of missions and de-
thing’s Great, was a great album. The       little to enhance the repetitive style       is also a good track, with its catchy back-     livery jobs to raise money. The controls
album, which tells stories of driving       throughout the album though.                 ground vocals and good use of acoustic          are bad, the missions are idiotic and the
around America, does so with a strong          The production level is sub-par on the    and electric guitars.                           gameplay itself is about as exciting as
alt-country rock feel reminiscent of Ryan   band’s second album, having chosen to           Let Me Come Home has a few good              watching trees grow. In short, the game
Adams and is the perfect soundtrack for     record live at Flowers Studio in Minne-      tracks, but simply doesn’t deliver the          plays like a budget-titled Grand Theft
any road trip.                              apolis, a decision that possibly should      road trip fun that its predecessor does.        Auto, minus the fun.
  Unfortunately, the band’s follow-up       be rethought.                                So if you’re looking for a good Limbeck           The list of complaints could go on for
Let Me Come Home, essentially repeats          The most interesting track on the al-     album, go with Hi Everything’s Great.           miles. If you value your brain cells, stay
their previous effort. Most of the songs    bum is “I Saw You Laughing, a slowed-
                                                                         ”                                         —Chris Brower         away from this game. It trucking sucks.
                                                                                                                                                               – Andrew Campbell
 ∏MOVIES
The Brothers Grimm                          towns. This goes on until the French         Me and You and Everyone                         children who exist somewhere in be-
PG-13, 118 minutes, South Wind 12           army finds beef with them and instead        We Know                                         tween. In spite of the film’s “freshman
∂∂∂                                         of locking them up, sends the two to a       R, 93 minutes, South Wind 12                          ”
                                                                                                                                         kinks, there are several laugh-out-loud
                                            town where a real curse causes young         ∂∂∂                                             moments. A bi-racial four-year-old and
     Between the horses that swallow        girls to disappear. The rest of the plot                                                     his older brother engage in a truly hilar-
children, little mud men stealing a         is so concocted and complicated I can        	 After debuting her first feature film,        ious conversation in a sex chat room.
child’s eyes and a kitten killed by whir-   hardly go into it. But needless to say,      Me and You and Everyone We Know,                    July makes wonderful use of quiet
ring blades, I came to one conclusion       the film has some problems, mostly in        Miranda July is now known in Holly-             moments between characters and her
about the The Brothers Grimm: director      the area of fancy and fantasy.               wood as a triple threat. She not only           script is sprinkled with poignant lines
Terry Gilliam (12 Monkeys) is one sick         Damon, as the lothario, and Ledger,       wrote the screenplay to this endlessly -        of dialogue and amusingly tender mo-
bastard.                                    as the dreamer, make plausible brothers      odd yet endearing film, but also stars in       ments of empathy. At one point the
   Matt Damon and Heath Ledger play         and they’re often funny in a shrieking,      and directs the movie. The film is about        divorcee solemnly says, “There is not
brothers, Will and Jake Grimm, the fu-      conniving kind of way. But they, too, get    the unusual and wonderful connections           enough time for time-outs. ”
ture authors of every fairytale known to    lost in the director’s overindulgence.       people choose to make throughout their            Miranda July cleverly displays a
man. Now, this film could have run with       The production design is really the star   everyday lives. The main characters are         unique collection of characters and their
that, exploring how the two men come        here. So if you must take the journey        written with a colorful array of idiosyn-       hopes, fears and traumas. But she falls
to create some of the most famous           into Gilliam’s world, where the storyline    crasies, albeit too blatantly. There is an      short with the main romance and exces-
stories in the world. But alas, Gilliam     doesn’t seem to matter, your eyes will       elderly Hispanic man who finds love             sively weird circumstances. Despite her
chooses to make the brothers into me-       be filled with captivating images. Unfor-    at the age of 70, two extremely bold            initial shortcomings, we can expect a
dieval Ghostbusters; the only difference    tunately, the most interesting thought       and competitive teenaged girls and a            bright future from her as evidenced in
is that they create their own ghosts and    in your head will probably be the ques-      middle-aged father struggling with a di-        this charming, yet unstable, first effort.
then “remove” them from unwitting           tion, “what?”                                vorce.
                                                                                           Initially, we are presented with adults
14| Jayplay 09.01.05                                                —Lindsey Ramsey
                                                                                         dealing with crossroads-situations and
                                                                                                                                                                  — Sarah Tucker
                                                                                                                                                                               speak



                                                                           Armed
                                                                             to defend                     Quelling fears with a gun
                                                                                                           By Laura Snyder




    Illustration	by	Scott	Kaserman

	 “The	 range	 is	 clear.	 	The	 line	 is	 set.	 much	rather	have	a	gun	and	not	need	it	
                                               	                                               —	choice	of	self-defense	weapons.                  women	 had	 needed	 to	 use	 her	 gun.	         	
Ready…fire!”                                     than	need	a	gun	and	not	have	it.              	 My	 friends’	 reactions	 about	 the	 gun	        None	of	the	women	had	turned	the	gun	
	 BANG.	 BANG.	 I	 squeeze	 the	 trigger	 	 Gun	 opponents	 argue	 that	 there	 are	           class	 varied.	 	 I	 learned	 that	 most	 peo-     on	 a	 husband	 or	 boyfriend.	 And	 there	
on	the	Glock	9	mm	and	fire	twice	at	the	 other	methods	of	self-defense.	I	agree.	I	            ple	 are	 uncomfortable	 with	 the	 idea	 of	      had	 been	 no	 accidental	 shootings.	          	
paper-human	outline	in	front	                             hope	to	return	to	Front	Sight	to	    a	 woman	 wielding	 a	 gun.	 But	 women	           While	the	number	of	rapes	in	1966	was	
of	me.	Two	perfect	little	holes	                          take	their	empty-hand	defense	       with	 guns	 make	 perfect	 sense	 to	 me.	     	   36,	 in	 1967,	 the	 year	 after	 the	 training,	
appear	 side-by-side	 in	 the	                            course	someday.		Yet,	no	mat-        Our	bodies	are	not	built	like	men’s.		We	          there	were	only	four	rapes.	In	addition,	
thoracic	cavity	of	my	target.                             ter	how	skilled	I	aspire	to	be	in	   weren’t	made	to	be	warriors.		In	an	at-            Orlando	 saw	 a	 25	 percent	 decrease	 in	
	 “Nice	 work,	 Laura, 	 says	
                          ”                               martial	arts,	I	know	that	if	I’m	    tack,	 a	 man	 could	 easily	 overpower	 a	        both	violent	assault	and	burglary,	mak-
the	rangemaster.                                          pitted	against	an	attacker	who	      woman.	But	guns	are	“the	great	equal-              ing	it	the	only	city	in	the	United	States	
	 When	 my	 sister	 graduated	                            is	 bigger	 and	 stronger	 than	     izer”	between	the	sexes.		 hey	put	us	on	
                                                                                                                              T                   with	 a	 population	 higher	 than	 100,000	
from	 college,	 she	 got	 an	 ex-                         me,	I	don’t	stand	a	chance.          even	 ground.	 I	 know	 that	 if	 a	 potential	    where	crime	actually	decreased	in	1967.
pensive	 ring.	 My	 friend	 got	                          	 	 	 I’ve	 done	 some	 research	    attacker	 knew	 I	 had	 a	 gun,	 I	 would	 be	     I’m	 not	 preaching	 that	 every	 woman	
a	 new	 car.	 I’m	 asking	 for	 a	                        and	found	that	other	methods	        safe.                                              should	own	a	gun.		It’s	a	big	responsibil-
                                        Laura Snyder
handgun.                                                  of	 self-defense	 are	 also	 inad-   	 How	 can	 I	 be	 so	 confident?	 Because	        ity.	And	if	you	aren’t	committed	to	edu-
                                       Jayplay writer
	 The	 decision	 to	 arm	 was	                            equate.	 Victims	 armed	 with	       empirical	 evidence	 suggests	 criminals	          cating	yourself	and	practicing	frequent-
easy	for	me.		While	I	haven’t	                            knives	are	six	times	more	like-      avoid	 armed	 victims.	 In	 Orlando,	 in	          ly,	a	gun	might	not	do	you	much	good	
grown	 up	 with	 guns	 or	 spent	 Satur- ly	to	be	injured	in	an	attack	than	victims	           1966,	 a	 series	 of	 brutal	 rapes	 plagued	      in	a	real	emergency	anyway.		I’ve	taken	
day	 afternoons	 shooting	 skeet	 like	 my	 armed	with	guns	and	twice	as	likely	to	            the	city.		In	response,	the	Orlando	Senti-         steps	to	educate	myself	about	guns	and	
grandpa,	 gun	 ownership	 just	 makes	 be	injured	than	victims	who	do	not	re-                  nel	Star	and	the	local	police	department	          will	continue	to	do	so	as	a	responsible	
sense	 to	 me.	 If	 I	 have	 the	 option,	 of	 sist.	Stun	guns	require	three	seconds	of	       trained	 6,000	 women	 to	 use	 guns	 in	          gun	owner.	Gun	owners	aren’t	paranoid	
course	 I’m	 going	 to	 choose	 to	 defend	 close	contact	with	an	attacker	to	distrib-         self-defense.	 	The	 newspaper	 gave	 in-          eccentrics	 who	 will	 one	 day	 go	 crazy	
myself,	not	stand	by	and	become	a	vic- ute	the	electrical	charge,	and	the	Mace	                credible	 coverage	 to	 the	 training,	 hop-       and	kill	someone	out	of	anger.		They’re	
tim	of	a	crime.	I	hope	I	will	never	need	 we	 buy	 is	 diluted	 and	 virtually	 useless	       ing	 to	 discourage	 the	 rapist	 or	 rapists	     simply	 people	 like	 me,	 who	 choose	 to	
to	 shoot	 someone.	 But,	 as	 I	 learned	 in	 against	an	attacker,	especially	one	who	        from	attacking	for	fear	that	the	women	            be	 responsible	 for	 their	 own	 safety	 in-
June	at	Front	Sight,	a	firearms	training	 is	 drunk	 or	 on	 narcotics.	 That	 leaves	         might	be	armed.                                    stead	of	becoming	victims.
institute	 outside	 of	 Las	Vegas,	 I	 would	 me	 with	 guns	 as	 my	 first	 —	 and	 only	     	 One	 year	 later,	 none	 of	 the	 trained	

                                                                                                                                                       09.01.05 Jayplay |15
                                       the

                        student
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