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Real Life

Real Life

Publisher: Simon & Schuster, Inc.

Published on: 09/16/2008

Print ISBN: 9781439131565

By: Dr. Phil McGraw

Available Formats: PDF
Requires: Adobe Digital Editions Download
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Description
What if you could see around the corners of your life? Wouldn't it help to know what the most challenging days of your life would be like BEFORE they hit?There are certain days in life that stand out because they are among the toughest that you or someone you love will experience. Your quality of life and your experience on the journey through this world are a function of how you handle these days when they arrive. Will you be ready? Will you be strong? Will you survive and be better for it, or will you cave?In Real Life: Preparing for the 7 Most Challenging Days of Your Life, bestselling author and talk show host Dr. Phil McGraw is here to help you prepare to confront what he believes are the seven most common critical days that you or a loved one are likely to face. This book helps make it possible for you to be there for yourself or to be the calm in the middle of the storm for someone you love when any of these difficult days arrive. Loss -- the day that you or someone you love has their heart shattered by death, divorce, or losing something of great value. Fear -- the day that you realize you have lived your life as a sellout and that every choice you have made up until this point was dictated by other people's expectations, not based on your own goals and desires. Adaptability Breakdown -- the day that the pressures of balancing your responsibilities and needs, along with life's demands, have become way too overwhelming, and you realize that you are in way over your head. Physical Health -- the day that your body or that of someone you love breaks down because of illness, trauma, or disease. Mental Health -- the day that the mind breaks down and betrays you or someone you love. Addiction -- the day that addiction takes over, and you or your loved one look a powerful destroyer in the face and realize that you are not in control. Existential Crisis -- the day that you or someone you love lose the purpose, compass, and connection to meaning in life and have no answer to the question "Why?"Encountering these days can feel like hitting a brick wall. But while they will change your life, they do not have to ruin it. Dr. Phil's step-by-step plan for getting through the worst days is designed to help you feel prepared when it really matters -- in the midst of a crisis. Dr. Phil provides wisdom and resources that will guide you toward a solution that is right for you, showing you how to minimize disruption and maximize the recovery.This book is not just about giving you a crisis-mode plan. It will also show you how to change your life now, before you get into a crisis, so that you are not behind the power curve when any of the seven days hit. You will be able to be a leader to someone you love during their crisis because you will know what to do. Dr. Phil says there are no exceptions: with the right attitude and the right information, every challenging day can be turned into a valuable life experience.
 
 
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AcknowledgmentsIntroduction1 Prep Talk 2 Attitude of Aproach3 StressThe Days Between the Peaks and the Valleys4 LossThe Day Your Heart Is Shattered5 Fear The Day You Realize You Have Lived Your Life as a Sellout6 Adaptability BreakdownThe Day You Realize You Are in Way over Your Head7 HealthThe Day the Body Breaks Down8 Mental HealthThe Day the Mind Breaks Down9 AddictionThe Day Addiction Takes Over10 Existential CrisisThe Day You Have Lost Your Purpose and Have No Answer to the Question "Why?"11 The Next StepAppendix AAppendix BAppendix CNotesResource Guide
1Prep TalkLife is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. -- John LennonIf we are fortunate in our lives, somewhere along the way we encounter at least a few special people who change us in powerful, positive, and sometimes unexpected ways. These individuals, although wise, are sometimes not at all persons you would consciously seek out for counsel. One such person I was blessed to have in my life was a flight instructor I met back in the sixties, a man from whom I expected to learn how to get airborne and nothing more. I could not have been more wrong, because he proved to be one of the great "gifts" in my life.Bill was, by his own account and all appearances, just a good ol' flying cowboy without a lot of formal education who happened to love anything that had to do with flying. But his contributions to my life ultimately proved to include much more than flying, as this very book will attest.I was just a teenager when I started taking lessons, but he "saw" into my future in that airplane. About the time I was finishing my training, he told me that I had checked all the boxes, done all the drills, met all of the requirements, and could certainly go get my license and wing happily off into the wild blue yonder. He then paused and said something that really got my attention. I have never forgotten that moment standing next to the plane on a grass landing strip outside a small town in north Texas. "Phil," he said, "you've got the basics, you know how to get 'er up and down and around the 'patch,' and frankly you ain't half bad. But I have come to know you, and I know just as sure as I'm standing here that you are going to need more than you got. You won't play at this flying stuff, you will attack it and make it a big part of your life rather than flying to Grandma's house on a nice clear Sunday afternoon. You're going to be out there 'mixing it up' come rain or come shine, daylight or dark, and that's okay, but the truth is things just happen when you mix it up. Maybe it will be your fault for being too aggressive, or maybe you will just be in the wrong place at the wrong time, but chances are that somewhere along the way this plane will carry you into a crisis. When you are airborne, all you've got is yourself. You'd have to depend on who you are, and if you aren't prepared for it ahead of time you can die in this airplane. So it's up to you -- but know that it may come and if it does, you will be one of two types of pilots: one who was ready and survives to tell the story, or one who wasn't and doesn't."He didn't wait for a response; he had spoken his piece and that was that. Even then I realized the significance of that exchange, mostly because he had just spoken more words than I had ever heard him say at once in the entire time I had known him. Now, you have to understand here that I was a teenager in the worst sense of the word. I suspect a lot of people who knew me then probably figured I had eaten a lot of paste as a child! Boy oh boy, did I have ants in my pants to "sky up" and go for it. Yet for some reason (and certainly out of character for me), I actually listened to his wise counsel. We weren't even almost done because I wasn't even almost prepared for when things would go wrong, and though I didn't know it then, they would in fact go wrong -- way wrong.Fast-forward four years and several hundred hours of flying later. I took off in a high-performance single-engine airplane just before midnight...

Dr. Phil McGraw (Author)

Dr. Phil Mcgraw is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Ultimate Weight Solution, Self Matters, Life Strategies, and Relationship Rescue. He is the host of the nationally syndicated, daily one-hour series Dr. Phil. One of the world's foremost experts in the field of human functioning, Dr. McGraw is the cofounder of Courtroom Sciences, Inc., the world's leading litigation consulting firm. Dr. McGraw currently lives in Los Angeles, California, with his wife and two sons.
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