The Alphabetical Hookup List A-J by P-SimonSchuster


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									The Alphabetical Hookup List A-J
Author: Phoebe McPhee

How 3 girls tried to hook up with 78 guys in 1 semester: the first installment.Our heroes:Jodi Stein,
cheerleader, bat mitzvah, and sorority hopeful, whose life plan prominently features her high school
sweetheart, Buster.Celeste Alexander, tormented intellectual and virgin, the daughter of a former
Buddhist monk and ex-nun.Ali Sheppard, a soul lost in a sea of lollipops and glow-sticks, whose long
distance boyfriend is a trip-hop hypnotica DJ named Sensei.It doesn't seem as if these three roomates
have much in common. Not at first. But then a night of misery brings them together -- a night when Jodi
finds Buster in a compromising position, Celeste discovers an unexpected side to her date, Jordan, and
Ali has a distressing phone call with Sensei. What starts as a simple game -- a game born of heartbreak,
a bottle of tequila, and a Scrabble® board -- evolves into a three-woman sexual revolution.Forget
boyfriends. Forget "life partners."This is the future.This is the Alphabetical Hookup List.The ABCs will
never be the same.


Jodi Stein pulled her brand-new silver Volkswagen Beetle over to the
side of the road just outside the Pollard University campus.

This is it, she thought. "Today is the first day of the rest
of your life."

She'd seen that once on a bumper sticker on the Long Island Expressway
and had always thought it was cute.

Jodi allowed herself a little smile in the rearview mirror. Even after
twelve hours of driving, she had to admit she looked pretty fine. No,
make that very fine. It hadn't been easy to choose an outfit,
either. What could you possibly wear for a twelve-hour drive from Great
Neck to the heart of Georgia -- and still dazzle your future Kappa Kappa
Gamma sorority sisters upon your arrival?

The answer: school-spirit casual.

Specifically, this style consisted of yellow satin gym shorts (not too
showy, and a colorist had once told Jodi that yellow complemented her
sandy brown hair), a green PU sweatshirt (Jodi always tried to wear a
little green to bring out the green flecks in her hazel eyes, and
wouldn't you know it -- green was one of PU's school colors!), and
tennis socks with pompoms on them. Oh, and of course her gold charm
necklace -- the one with a namesake pendant. The one Buster had given
her to mark their first anniversary, almost a year ago to the day.

"Hey, Buster, can you believe it?" Jodi whispered. "In less than a week
we'll have been together -- I mean, like, officially together --
for two whole years."

Buster didn't answer. He had been asleep since they'd stopped at
Denny's, despite the fact that he'd slurped down three coffee milk

She watched him in the passenger seat, passed out in his little sugar
coma. Curled up like that, he looked even cuter than usual. His
square-jawed, close-cropped blond head lolled to one side, and his
perfectly sculpted body was completely relaxed. Jodi loved the way
Buster looked. She especially loved his powerful neck. Some girls loved
guys with long, skinny necks. But those kinds of girls usually had
pierced tongues and smoked too much and spent all their time in dark
clubs where being cool depended on how depressed you looked. The chest,
though: that was really what mattered. And Buster had chest from here to

"Buster?" she tried again.

Still no answer.

They had driven together all the way from Long Island, playing that
alphabet game where you have to locate letters of the alphabet in signs
and license plates in order from A to Z. It hadn't exactly
been the most romantic trip in the world. But they had made it, and
there was nothing more romantic than the fact that they were going to
college together. It was what they had always planned. Getting accepted
to the same school, living apart in dorms freshman year so they could
each have the true college experience, and then getting an apartment
together sophomore year. . . .

But she was getting ahead of herself. They hadn't even driven into the
campus parking lot. She was excited. And nervous. And unable to keep
still. She couldn't wait any longer. She had to wake up Buster so
they could both always remember this moment.

"Psst! Buster." She leaned over and rubbed his chest. Do I Look Like a
Fucking People Person? was written on his T-shirt in big black letters.

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