VIEWS: 30 PAGES: 95 POSTED ON: 7/25/2011
Parenting Unit 1 The Parenthood Decision 1.1 Match terms related to the parenthood decision 1. Adoptive parent—a person who becomes a parent through a legal process 2. Biological parent—two people who conceive a child, also called birth parents 3. Blended family—either or both spouses have been married before and have one or more children from a previous relationship 4. Extended family—several generations of a family that live together 5. Family planning—a deliberate act of deciding how many children and the spacing of years between each child 6. Foster parent—a person who provides a temporary home for a child 7. Genetic counseling—medical advice that tells a couple the options and risks of having genetic problems their children 8. Heredity—the sum of all the qualities a person inherits from his or her parents at birth 9. Infertility—the inability to conceive a child 10. Nuclear family—made up of a married couple and their biological or adoptive children 11. Parenting—the process of caring for children and helping them grow and learn 12. Sibling—a brother or sister 23 Lessons I Learned from my Parents 1. My parents taught me: TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My parents taught me: RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 3. My parents taught me: TIME TRAVEL . "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" 4. My parents taught me: LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why." 5. My parents taught me: MORE LOGIC . "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 6. My parents taught me: FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 7. My parents taught me: IRONY "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." 8. My parents taught me about the science of OSMOSIS . "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 9. My parents taught me: CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!" 10. My parents taught me about STAMINA . "You'll sit there until all those lima beans are gone." 11. My parents taught me: WEATHER . "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it." 12. My parents taught me: HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!" 13. My parents taught me: THE CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." 14. My parents taught me: ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do." 15. My parents taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until your father gets home." 16. My parents taught me: RECEIVING . "You are going to get it when you get home!" 17. My parents taught me: MEDICAL SCIENCE . "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way." 18. My parents taught me: ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?" 19. My parents taught me: HUMOR . "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." 20. My parents taught me: HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT . "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 21. My parents taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn ?" 22. My parents taught me: WISDOM . " When you get to be my age, you'll understand." 23. And my favorite: My PARENTS TAUGHT ME ABOUT JUSTICE "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you! Chapter 1 Objectives: 1. Classify types of parents—1.2 2. List types of family structures with components of each—1.4 Classify types of parents—1.2 Biological/Birth Parents When a male and female conceive and have a child Adoptive Parents Those who decide to adopt a child when his/her biological parents give up parental rights Legal Guardians An adult, appointed by the courts, that takes legal responsibility for a minor Foster Parents Adults who have temporary custody of a child; must be approved and licensed by the state List types of family structures with components of each (1.4) Family Structures Nuclear—mom, dad, never been divorced Extended—other relatives in addition to your own immediate family Single-parent—one parent and their children Blended—one or more people have been married/divorced (step parents/siblings) Other—adoptive, foster, grandparents, other family members Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 Chapter 3 Objectives: 1. State factors to consider in making a parenthood decision—1.3 2. Develop a checklist of personal qualities needed for effective parenting—1.3.1 3. Examine effects of parenthood on marriage and personal relationships—1.3.2 4. List costs related to having and raising a child—1.5 Frameworks # 1.4, 1.4.1, 1.4.2, 2.3, 2.3.1, 3.10, 3.10.1, 3.10.2 What would change about you/your life if you became a parent right now? What are your goals for your life? What do you want out of life? Are you willing to be TOTALLY SELF-LESS? p. 66 Goals • Will plans for education have to be sacrificed? • Will career goals have to be changed? • Will such goals as buying a car, living independently, or building a savings account have to be put off? KEY IDEA: If you are not emotionally prepared to take full responsibility for your own life, you are NOT ready to make a life-long commitment to a child! State factors to consider in making a parenthood decision (1.3) Things to consider BEFORE becoming a parent…. 1. Age 2. Health 3. Readiness 4. Reasons for wanting children 5. Relationship status 6. Financial status p. 67 Age, Health and Readiness Pregnancy and childbirth pose serious risks for adolescents and for their babies. Children born to teen mothers are more likely to… – Die before age 2, have health problems, be mentally retarded, have learning disorders, be abused, fall in the poverty category, become sexually active at a younger age Age, Health and Readiness A teen mother’s health also impacts the baby. Smoking, drinking, doing drugs, eating disorders, contacting a STD—all of these have an adverse affect on an unborn child! Be physically mature Both parents should be in good physical Exercise health No alcohol, tobacco, Eat nutritiously or drugs. Maturity… You will need to be flexible with your time. You will need to be able to function with interrupted sleep patterns. You will need to be patient. You will need to share your money, resources and time with your child. You’ll need to be able to deal with the frustrations of a crying child. Lifestyle • Social life definitely changes! • What interests and activities are you willing to limit or put off in order to concentrate on raising a child? KEY IDEA: All children deserve parents who are ready and happy to take on the huge job ahead of them of becoming a parent! What are some reasons for wanting to become a parent? Poor Good Love children To prove adulthood To please someone Want to pass on your legacy For emotional benefits Are emotionally, For respect and status financially and To escape a situation physically able to take Because society expects it care of a child To improve a bad WANT a child relationship For welfare checks What are signs of a healthy relationship? The relationship is satisfying. Each person treats the other respectfully. The relationship is stable. Both people work to resolve conflicts and reach compromises. The couple shares a common philosophy about having and raising children. The couple doesn’t have serious differences or problems. Relationships The relationship needs to be at the goal- directed stage. Couples need to have a firm commitment to one another & their love should form a strong foundation for building a family Stability… – Having children strengthens stable relationships but... – Having a baby makes a weak relationship weaker. KEY IDEA: All children deserve to have a happy home! Are you ready to be a parent? How do you know if you’re ready? Be honest with yourself. See page 64—how do you rate on emotional maturity? Parenting Readiness Test Take this simple test to determine whether or not you are ready to have children... • THE MESS TEST: – Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flower bed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer. • THE TOY TEST: – Obtain a 55-gallon box of Legos. (If Legos are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream, this could wake a sleeping child. • THE GROCERY STORE TEST: – Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage. • THE DRESSING TEST: – Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag, making sure that all arms stay inside. • THE FEEDING TEST: – Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. When finished, dump the contents of the jug on the floor and over your clothes. • THE NIGHT TEST: – Obtain a small cloth bag and fill it with 8-12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8 PM begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9 PM. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10pm. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these until 4 am. Set alarm for 5 am. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. • INGENUITY TEST – Take an egg carton. Using a pair of scissors and pot of paint, turn it into an alligator. Now take a toilet paper tube and turn it into an attractive Christmas candle. Use only scotch tape and a piece of foil. Last, take a milk carton, a ping-pong ball, and an empty box of Cocoa Puffs. Make a replica of the Eiffel Tower. • AUTOMOBILE TEST – Forget the BMW and buy a station wagon. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there. Get a dime. Stick it into the cassette player. Take a family size package of chocolate chip cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car. • THE PHYSICAL TEST (WOMEN): – Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to your front under your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans. And try not to notice your closet full of clothes. You won't be wearing them for a while. • THE PHYSICAL TEST (MEN): – Go to the nearest drugstore. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time. • THE FINAL ASSIGNMENT: – Find a couple who already has a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run rampant. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you have all the answers. Personal Readiness Quiz (Agree or Disagree) 1. I don’t care much about my free time. 2. I get frustrated easily when things don’t go my way. 3. Sleeping late is not very important to me. 4. Routines are boring. 5. I have a lot of confidence in myself. 6. I wouldn’t mind spending $400 a month on someone else for the next 18 years. 7. I would want my child to be just like me. Personal Readiness Quiz Continued 8. I still have years to go before I am fully mature. 9. I enjoy sharing my possessions with others. 10. I like going out and doing things when I feel like it. 11. I sometimes have trouble controlling my temper. 12. Children get on my nerves. 13. I feel unprepared to take care of a newborn baby. Personal Readiness Quiz Continued 14. I feel unprepared to take care of a 6-year-old. 15. I feel unprepared to take care of a 12-year- old. 16. I need someone to love me before I can love myself. 17. I find it easy to be flexible and compromise. 18. I am a good communicator, listener, and problem-solver. 19. Household chores are a drag. Handbook: Checklist for Parents Develop a checklist of personal qualities needed for effective parenting (1.3.1) Handbook Checklist for Parents Create a checklist (a top 10 list) of rules that EVERY parent must abide by. This should accurately reflect what you feel about parenting. Be sure to include attributes that you feel parents should have. CIRCLE the two you need to work on. UNDERLINE the two you feel you have mastered. Write a paragraph telling how you will improve in the areas you feel you are deficient. Examine effects of parenthood on marriage and personal relationships (1.3.2) How do you think children would affect a marriage relationship? Some things to think about… Children do NOT make a weak marriage stronger…they just add to the stress. Just because you got pregnant, does NOT mean he will stay. List costs related to having and raising a Furniture child—1.5 Clothes Bed T-shirts Changing table Gowns rocker socks Equipment Toys Bath tub Rattles Stroller Stuffed animals Swing Childcare Supplies Types and cost vary Diaper/wipes Formula Breastfeeding supplies What kind of costs are associated with raising children? • Food—how much food have you eaten in your lifetime? • Clothing—for all ages and stages (diapers too) • Shelter—mortgage, utility bills • Insurance—medical and life • Extracurricular—sports, leisure activities • School—supplies, clubs, uniforms • Transportation—gas, car • Extra—cell phones, • Special occasions—birthdays, holidays, pictures Is financial preparation important? YES! The average family spends $10,000 per year for child care for ONE kid. Just giving birth costs more than $6,000, and if your child is not healthy, that number increases. Having a child not only INCREASES parents’ costs but may also DECREASE a parents’ income Financial • Financially stable • Initial expenses – Doctor – Hospital – Baby Food – Diapers – Car Seat – Furniture • To raise a child to the age of eighteen, it will cost as much as $250,000. How do you know if you’re ready financially? Answer these questions: – Do we have a steady income to meet current needs PLUS additional expenses? – How much savings do we have? – Are other resources available? – What are the costs of having a child and health care? – Do we have health insurance? – Can we afford for one parent to stay at home? – Will we need a larger home to accommodate a growing family? Application: • Research costs associated with having and raising a child. http://www.teenageparent.org/english/costofbaby2B.html Chapter 7 Objectives: • Name reasons for family planning—1.6 • List factors that influence family planning decisions—1.7 • Describe the purpose of genetic counseling— 1.8 Name reasons for family planning—1.6 Ensures parenthood is by choice rather than by chance Allows couples to achieve goals they have set for themselves Couples can determine what size family they desire Why PLAN your family? 1. Make sure children are truly wanted. 2. Allow time to build a solid relationship before having children. 3. Make sure you are prepared for children. List factors that influence family planning decisions—1.7 So, what should you consider before you decide to become a parent? ? Do you like children? ? Are you READY? ? Is your relationship strong enough? ? Is your bank account big enough? ? Is this the right time in your life for children? ? Am I healthy enough to have children? Questions to ask yourself (and your spouse): Do we share common values on raising/disciplining children? How soon do we want to begin a family? How many kids do we want? How far apart in years do we want them to be spaced? How will we balance work and family? Who will take care of the children? Describe the purpose of genetic counseling—1.8 Genetic Counselors can… • Let you know your chances of having a baby with a certain disorder • Talk to you about your options • Artificial insemination • In vitro fertilization • Ovum transfer • Surrogate mothers ACTIVITY: IDEALISTIC TIMELINE (HANDBOOK) Handbook Assignment: “My Idealistic Timeline” • Plan your future family. • Tell when you’ll have your first, second, third, etc. babies. • Determine what year it will be for each birth. • Highlight other life accomplishments on your time line. Example: Mrs. Hays’s timeline Any Questions? REVIEW: 1. Name 3 reasons for family planning. 2. List 5 factors that influence family planning decisions. 3. What is the purpose of genetic counseling? 4. What would 3 challenges of parenting a special needs child be? Abortion by Christina Mommy, Last night you sang me a song but tears fell from your eyes. You said you were sorry but I didn’t understand why. Mommy, Last night you rubbed my head and you sang me a lullaby. Then you said you were ready to die and I didn’t understand why. Mommy, Last night you laid down and told me all your strives. Then you said you hated yourself and I didn’t understand why. Mommy, Last night you kept hitting me time after time. Then you said you hated me and I didn’t understand why. Mommy, Last night you drunk and got me high. Then you asked me to go away and I didn’t understand why. Mommy, Last night you let the doctor kill me with a knife. I wasn’t even born yet and I didn’t understand why.
Pages to are hidden for
"Parenting"Please download to view full document