Thought Bakery - Some Half Baked, Some Well Done - But All Definitely Funny

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thoughts, quotes, inspirational messages, motivational messages, funny quotes, funny thoughts

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thought bakery Mohit Chhabra 2007 mohit@chhabra.co.in Some half baked, some well done but definitely lots of fun! When I was a boy, I was told anybody could become President. I am beginning to believe it. Clarence Darrow We can throw stones, complain about them, stumble on them, climb over them, or build with them. William Arthur Ward Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it. Greg Anderson Is sloppiness in speech caused by ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care. William Safire A suicide helpline is where they talk to you until you don’t feel like killing yourself. Exactly the opposite of telemarketing. Dana Snow How much easier it is to be critical than be correct. Benjamin Disraeli Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. A year from now you may wish you had started today. Karen Lamb The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do! BF Skinner The best way to teach people is by telling a story. Kenneth Blanchard Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. Mark Twain Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you. Love me and I may be forced to love you. William Arthur Ward . In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is. Yogi Berra My wife and I were happy for 20 years and then we met. Rodney Dangerfield The American people love Home Shopping Network because it is commercial free. Will Durst Education is not the filling of a bucket, but the lighting of a fire. W. B. Yeats You have a brain like Einstein's – dead since 1955. Gene Perret If I were your wife, I’d put poison in your coffee. If I were your husband, I’d drink it. Nancy Astor and Winston Churchill The word duck is 75% obscene. Lenny Bruce Marge: You know, Homer, it is very easy to criticize. Homer: Fun, too My favourite machine in the gym is the vending machine. Caroline Rhea The mark of a true MBA is that he is often wrong but seldom in doubt. Robert Buzzell David Bissonnette My wife had a go at me last night. She said, “You'll drive me to my grave.” I had the car out in thirty seconds. Common etiquette says not to talk about politics, sex, religion, or money. But these are the only things interesting enough to discuss! An Apple a day keeps Windows away Bumper Sticker The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? Anon Never judge a book by its movie. JW Eagan Four steps to achievement: Plan purposefully. Prepare prayerfully. Proceed positively. Pursue persistently. William Arthur Ward I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me. Henry Youngman The person who knows to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused. Russ Dudley Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down. Jimmy Durante Never spend your money before you have it. Thomas Jefferson People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to. The secret of teaching is to appear to have known all your life what you learned this afternoon...

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