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					CHAPTER TOPICS
                          EMOTIONS:
              FEELING, THINKING, AND
                    COMMUNICATING                      4
  •   What are Emotions?
  •   Influences on Emotional Expression
  •   Guidelines for Expressing Emotions
  •   Managing Difficult Emotions



                                           Looking Out/Looking In
                                              Thirteenth Edition
                   What Are Emotions?
• Physiological Factors
     • Strong emotions are coupled with strong
       physiological factors
          • Physical components of fear:
               •   Increased heart rate
               •   Rise in blood pressure
               •   Increase in adrenaline secretions
               •   Elevated blood sugar
               •   A slowing of the digestive system



EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING         2
                   What are Emotions?
• Nonverbal Reactions
     • Feelings are often apparent by observable
       reactions
          • Appearance Changes
               • Blushing, sweating, etc
          • Behavioral Changes
               •   Facial expression
               •   Posture
               •   Gestures
               •   Different vocal tone or rate


EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING     3
                What are Emotions?
• Cognitive Interpretations
     • The mind plays an important role in
       determining emotional states
          • The symptoms of fear discussed earlier are similar
            to those of excitement, joy and other emotions
          • If you were to monitor someone having a strong
            emotional reaction, you would have a hard time
            ascertaining which emotion the person was
            experiencing


EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING               4
                What are Emotions?
• Verbal Expression
     • Words can be required to discover the depth
       or intensity of the emotion
     • At times we can’t rely on perceptiveness to be
       sure a message is communicated
          • Is a new acquaintance mistaking your
            friendlessness as a come-on?
          • Is a lover’s unenthusiastic response a sign of
            boredom with you, or something less personal?


EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING               5
           Influences on Emotional
                  Expression
• Personality
     • There is a clear relationship between
       personality and the way we experience and
       express emotions
          • Extroverts tend to report more positive emotions
          • Neurotic individuals tend to report more negative
            emotions
     • Personality doesn’t have to govern your
       communication satisfaction

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                  6
           Influences on Emotional
                  Expression
• Culture
     • A significant factor that influences emotional
       expression in different cultures is whether that
       culture is:
          • Individualistic (United States and Canada)
               • These cultures feel comfortable revealing their emotions
                 to people with whom they are close
          • Collectivistic (Japan and India)
               • These cultures prize harmony and discourage
                 expressions of negative emotions which may upset
                 relationships

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                              7
           Influences on Emotional
                  Expression
• Gender
     • Biological sex is the best predictor of the
       ability to detect/interpret emotional expression
          • Research suggests that there is some truth to the
            unexpressive male
          • In one study, females were 10-15% more accurate
            in remembering emotional images
     • People in close relationships are likely to
       experience/express more emotions than
       those who are not
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING              8
           Influences on Emotional
                  Expression
• Social Conventions
     • The unwritten rules of communication
       discourage the direct expression of emotion
          • How many genuine emotional expressions do you
            or we see in daily life?
          • Social rules even discourage too much expression
            of positive feelings
     • Emotion Labor
          • Managing or even suppressing emotions is both
            appropriate and necessary
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING              9
           Influences on Emotional
                  Expression
• Fear of Self-Disclosure
     • In a society that discourages the expression
       of emotions, revealing them can seem risky
• Emotional Contagion
     • The process by which emotions are
       transferred from one person to another
          • Is it possible to catch someone’s mood?
          • Emotions become more infectious with prolonged
            contact

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING               10
         Guidelines for Expressing
                 Emotion
• There is not a universal rule for expression
  of emotion
     • Personality, culture, gender, play a part
     • The key is to express emotion constructively
          • Think about a time when you expressed your
            emotion clearly, then wish you hadn’t.
     • Those who control their feelings and deny
       distress are more likely to get a host of
       ailments, including cancer and heart disease

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING           11
         Guidelines for Expressing
                 Emotion
• Recognize Your Feelings
     • Beyond being aware, also try to identify
• Recognize the difference between feeling,
  talking and acting
• Expand your emotional vocabulary
• Share multiple feelings
     • You might often express anger but overlook
       confusion, disappointment or frustration

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING      12
         Guidelines for Expressing
                 Emotion
• Consider When and Where to Express
  Your Feelings
     • Give yourself time to discover the gravity of
       the emotion before full expression
• Accept responsibility for your feelings
     • Instead of saying:
          • “You’re making me angry!” try “I’m getting angry.”
          • “You hurt my feelings,” say “I feel hurt when you do
            that.”

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                 13
         Guidelines for Expressing
                 Emotion
• Be Mindful of the Communication Channel
     • Mediated Channels
          • Email
          • Instant Message
          • SMS Message
     • Is it appropriate to end a relationship via
       voicemail?
     • What is the result of using CAPITAL
       LETTERS in an instant message or email?

EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING       14
      Managing Difficult Emotions
• Facilitative and Debilitative Emotions
     • Facilitative Emotions
          • Are emotions which contribute to effective
            functioning
     • Debilitative Emotions
          • Are emotions which detract from effective
            functioning
     • Intensity
          • Anger or irritation may be beneficial
          • Rage usually makes matters worse
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING           15
      Managing Difficult Emotions
• Sources of Debilitative Emotions
     • Our genetic makeup
     • Emotional memory
          • Harmless events can trigger debilitative feelings
     • Self-talk




EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                  16
      Managing Difficult Emotions
• Self-Talk
     • Interpretations people make of an event,
       during the process of self-talk that determine
       their feelings
Event                         Thought                        Feeling
Being called names            “I’ve done something wrong.”   hurt, upset

Being called names            “My friend must be sick.”      concern,
                                                             sympathy



EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                             17
      Managing Difficult Emotions
• Irrational Thinking
• The Fallacies
     • The Fallacy of Perfection
          • The belief that a worthwhile communication should
            be able to handle every situation
     • The Fallacy of Approval
          • That it is vital to gain the approval of virtually every
            person



EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                     18
      Managing Difficult Emotions
• Irrational Thinking
     • The Fallacy of Shoulds
          • The inability to distinguish between what is and
            what should be
     • The Fallacy of Overgeneralization
          • Basing a decision on limited information
          • When we exaggerate shortcomings
     • The Fallacy of Causation
          • The irrational belief that emotions are caused by
            others rather than by one’s own self-talk
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                  19
      Managing Difficult Emotions
• Irrational Thinking
     • The Fallacy of Helplessness
          • Satisfaction in life is determined by forces beyond
            your control
     • The Fallacy of Catastrophic Expectations
          • The assumption that if something bad can happen,
            then it is going to happen




EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING                    20
      Managing Difficult Emotions
• Minimizing Debilitative Emotions
     •   Monitor your emotional reactions
     •   Note the activating event
     •   Record your self-talk
     •   Reappraise your irrational beliefs
     •   Replace self-defeating self-talk with more
         constructive thinking



EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING        21
                      Chapter Review
•   What are Emotions?
•   Influences on Emotional Expression
•   Guidelines for Expressing Emotions
•   Managing Difficult Emotions




EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING   22

				
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