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Planned Giving Isn Funny

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					     LOL! – Harnessing the Power of
      Humour in Donor and Client
             Relationships




                 Peter Brimacombe, CFRE
     Manager, Major Donor Relations and Planned Giving
                         Canadian Red Cross
                            909 Fairfield Rd
                         Victoria, BC V8V 3A3
                          Tel. (250) 995-3518
                E-mail: Peter.Brimacombe@redcross.ca




This presentation also includes: video clips, quotes read by participants,
 a PowerPoint presentation with numerous photographs, and a role play
                        including ventriloquism.
                                 I. DEFINITIONS
Humour is...the quality of being funny.

Funny (rooted in “fun”) means causing amusement or laughter.

A long-winded definition of laughter is...
a physical response or expression of emotion, through the expulsion of air from the
lungs in short bursts with the mouth open, producing inarticulate vocal noises.

“Laughter is a smile that’s burst.” – anonymous



                      II. SOME OF THE MANY TYPES
                                  OF LAUGHTER
o Joyful laughter
o Amused laughter
o Cynical laughter
o Embarrassed laughter
o Startled laughter
o Foolish laughter
o Sinister laughter
o Insane laughter
o Hysterical (uncontrollable) laughter
o Teasing/mocking laughter
o Surprised laughter
o Spontaneous laughter
o Nervous laughter
o Excited laughter
o Tickle response laughter
o Nitrous oxide (laughing gas) induced laughter
o Other gas induced laughter
o Reduced inhibition laughter (e.g. drugs, alcohol, fatigue)
o Other




                                      - page 2 of 7 -
                           III. TYPES OF HUMOUR
A. WIN/LOSE HUMOUR (Making fun OF others...laughing AT others)
o Snide humour
o Teasing humour
o Sarcastic humour
o Gross/irreverent humour
o Slapstick/physical humour
o Morbid/black humour
o Bad luck humour
o Practical jokes
o Scare/shock humour
o Satirical humour (political humour is often satire)
o Other

B. WIN/WIN HUMOUR (Having fun WITH others...laughing WITH others)
o Affectionate humour (can include teasing)
o Word play
o Laughing at ourselves (making fun of ourselves can be elevating)
o Zany/silly humour (can also be win/lose)
o Exaggeration humour
o Humour from the unexpected/unusual
o Humour that makes hardship survivable
o Other
                 IV. BENEFITS OF WIN/WIN HUMOUR
o Feels good
o Breaks the ice
o Warms/opens the heart
o Expresses affection
o Makes encounters memorable
o Stimulates interest
o Provides a pleasant escape/diversion
o Eliminates pretence
o Relieves tension psychologically and physiologically

                                     - page 3 of 7 -
o Promotes health
o Relieves pain
o Has healing properties
o Can help diminish hopelessness, fear and depression
o Unites people together in the common celebration of laughter


    V. USING HUMOUR WITH OUR DONORS AND CLIENTS
Given the many, positive benefits of win/win humour, it can be a beneficial and
significant element in our own health and in all of our relationships (including with
donors and clients).

If we can give donors and clients the gift of laughter, they will benefit from, and look
forward to their encounters with us.
However, using humour can be risky. If we don’t get it right, we can offend others
and/or fall flat on our face. Therefore, it’s important to try to get it right.


A. GETTING IT RIGHT
Use the right TYPE of humour (win/win, not win/lose)
with the right MOTIVATION (to benefit the donor/client)
for the right PERSON (know your donor or client and his/her sense of humour)
at the right TIME (what may work at one time may not at another)
in the right PLACE (location may or may not make a difference)
in the right COMPANY (who else is with you, what is their relationship, what is their
style of humour?)


B. PREPARING TO USE HUMOUR

1. CREATE A HUMOUR FILE
o Make a point of writing down or copying things you see/hear/think are funny
o Sources include: Internet sites, newspaper articles/cartoons, jokes or funny stories
  you hear, funny things that happened to you personally
o Can be hard copy or electronic
o Adhere to copyright laws
o Keep adding to this file
o Optional: categorize contents


                                       - page 4 of 7 -
2. PLAN AHEAD FOR EACH DONOR/CLIENT MEETING
o Consider the six “rights”
o Reflect ahead of time on your donor’s/client’s interests and his/her level and type of
   humour
o Identify something in your humour file (verbal or written) your donor/client might
   enjoy
o Identify something you both know/enjoy that includes humorous elements and build
   on this
o Think about funny things that may have happened to you since you last met that you
   can share

3. PRACTISE YOUR DELIVERY
o Visualize yourself with your donor or client, and practise how you’re going to share
   the story
(The option exists to give him/her something funny in writing)

C. WHEN YOU ARE WITH THE DONOR/CLIENT

1.   KEY POINTS
o    Test the waters first...take small steps in humour until you know your donor/client
o    If in doubt – don’t
o    Focus on your donor’s/client’s needs
o    Enjoy his/her company and humour
o    Have fun

2. WHAT IF YOU GET IT A LITTLE WRONG?
- Not a big deal. Probably best to ignore it and move on (divert/guide the conversation
elsewhere), knowing you will probably make up for it in other ways.

3.   WHAT IF YOU GET IT REALLY WRONG?
o    Apologize
o    Explain your honourable intention
o    Laugh at yourself
o    Move to next subject/topic
o    Analyze afterwards what wasn’t “right”
o    Identify the lessons learned (and learn from them)


D. AFTER THE DONOR/CLIENT MEETING
o Make and keep post-meeting notes including references to humorous elements of
  the meeting
                                        - page 5 of 7-
                      VI. SOME QUOTABLE QUOTES
                       ON HUMOUR AND LAUGHTER


“Laughter is the closest distance between two people.” - Victor Borge

“Laughter is a smile that’s burst.” - anonymous

“Blessed are they who laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.”
- anonymous

“Laugh at yourself, before anyone else can.” - Elsa Maxwell

“Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else’s can
shorten it.” - Cullen Hightower

“Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.” - Mark Twain

“If you can find humor in anything, you can survive it.” - Bill Cosby

“A sense of humour is just common sense, dancing.” - Clive Jones

“Start every day off with a smile – and get it over with.” - W.C. Fields

“Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.” - Lord Byron

Warning: humor may be hazardous to your illness. - Ellie Katz

“Laughter is inner jogging.” - Norman Cousins

“Our five senses are incomplete without the sixth – a sense of humour.”
- anonymous

“ Gentlemen, why don’t you laugh? If I did not laugh I should die, and you need this
medicine as much as I do.” - Abraham Lincoln

“You don’t stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop
laughing.” - Mary Pettibone Poole

“May your walls know joy; may every room hold laughter, and every window open to
great possibility.” - Maryanne Radmacher-Hershey




                                      - page 6 of 7 -
                           VII. REFERENCE SOURCES

A. VIDEO CLIPS
“America’s Funniest Home Videos” clips provided courtesy of Vin Di Bona Productions


B. STILL PHOTOS
http://philadelphia.littlebrothers.org
www.ahajokes.com
www.birthjourney.com
www.claybennett.com
www.cybersalt.org
www.funnies.com
www.hanscomfamily.com
www.paintedstork.com
www.redcross.ca
www.sublimephotography.co.uk


C. INFORMATION SOURCES (BOOKS & WEBSITES)

“Anatomy of an Illness” by Norman Cousins
“Beyond Crazy” by Julia Nunes and Scott Simmie
“Laughter – A Scientific Investigation” by Robert Provine
“Patch Adams” – the movie
“The Healing Power of Humour” by Allen Klein


www.cancer.org
www.coolquotes.com
http://islandireland.com
www.quotationspage.com
www.quotegarden.com
www.quoteworld.org
www.thehumorarchives.com



                                         - page 7 of 7 -

				
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