DEALING WITH FEELINGS Lesson 6.2 Purpose decision-making, and conflict resolution) for The student will understand the importance of a effective, responsible interpersonal positive self-concept, interpersonal relationships, relationships. and the relationships of sound social, emotional Assess the impact of cultural, personal, family, and mental health practices to wellness. and community health and fitness. The student will understand the consequences of personal actions as they relate to personal, Lifelong Learning Standards mental, and social health. Students can effectively communicate with different audiences, through a variety of Key Concepts mediums, to achieve different purposes. The learner will: Students can listen attentively and understand 1. establish skills to cope appropriately with the intended message or main ideas expressed feelings. in spoken forms of communications. 2. identify and develop behavior necessary for Students can work with team members from people to cooperate with others by: diverse backgrounds to accomplish group goals. a. utilizing effective communication skills. Students can identify and assess the benefits, b. increasing self-knowledge and identifying risks, and consequences of decisions and qualities found in meaningful relationships. actions. c. practicing respect, understanding, responsibility, and self-discipline in Teaching Tips relationships. Remind students not to use someone’s name d. describing strategies for recovering when when talking negatively. friendships end. Use the want ads from newspapers to show 3. use self-assessment and goal setting as a some examples of how personal want ads means to improve feelings about self. should be written. MCS Standards 1 and 2 Time Students should be able to effectively ½ class meeting demonstrate knowledge and skills for good mental, social, emotional, and physical health Materials and safety. Paper Students should be able to make and Pencils communicate sound judgments about the Homework Assignment Sheets influences of culture, media, technology, and other factors on personal, family, and community Vocabulary health and fitness. Aggressive Body Language Specific Expectations 1-5 and 2-1 Passive Communicate emotions, feelings, and ideas in Self-control positive ways and demonstrate skills Socially acceptable (collaboration, negotiation, refusal, goal-setting, INVESTIGATION Large Group Discussions Begin the lesson by stating there are proper and improper ways to express our emotions. This lesson will allow us to identify proper, as well as improper ways to express our emotions. Divide the class into seven cooperative learning groups and assign each group one of the following situations. Ask each group to work together to propose a proper response to their situation. Each group will be asked to role -play their proper response for the entire class. Someone accidentally knocked your books all over the floor. Someone said something untrue or bad about your best friend or a family member. Someone tried to copy off your paper. You were assigned to a project with someone with whom you do not get along. Your teacher accuses you unfairly of talking. Your coach yelled at you for missing a play. Your best friend makes you mad. Allow each group to present their role-play and encourage feedback from the other students. If one or more groups make an improper response, very gently suggest that maybe there is a more delicate or a more proper way than what they have suggested. Now ask students to take out a sheet of paper and pencil. Ask them to respond to the following statements/questions: 1. List qualities you admire in your parents. 2. List qualities you admire in your friends 3. Is there ever a time when a friendship cannot be mended? Then what would you do? Discuss students’ responses to the above statements/questions. Use them as a basis for discussion about meaningful relationships. Ask students to look at their own personal qualities. Ask them if they posses the same qualities they value in their friends and family. Are they happy with themselves or is there room for improvement? What would they change about themselves in order to be a better friend? Allow students to discuss. APPLICATION Choose one or both. 1. Want Ad Materials: paper and pencil Write a want ad for the perfect friend. Be sure to list all the qualities you find important. Be prepared to share your want ad with the rest of the class. 2. My Want Ad Materials: paper and pencil Write ad describing the qualities you currently possess as a friend or the type of qualities you would like to possess. Be prepared to share your want ad with the rest of the class. HOMEWORK Share your want ad(s) with your parents. Ask them for feedback. Ask parents what they think about the following descriptors: kind, nice, loyal, honest, and trustworthy. ASSESSMENT Choose one or both. 1. Give the students a hypothetical situation where someone does something to make them mad, offend them or someone they love, hurt their feelings, etc. Have students write out an appropriate response to the situation. Teacher and students together can determine the assessment criteria. 2. Use the Application #1 Want Ads or #2 My Want Ad as an assessment. Teacher and student together can determine the assessment criteria. GLOSSARY 1. aggressive – being overly forceful, pushy, or hostile. 2. body language – postures gestures, facial expressions, etc., which unconsciously give clues to what a person is thinking and may be used to emphasize verbal statements. 3. passive – giving up, giving in, or backing down without standing up for one’s own rights and needs. 4. self-control – control of one’s actions or feelings. 5. socially acceptable – appropriate behavior that adheres to the customs of society. Me, Myself, and Others Lesson 6.3 Purpose Lifelong Learning Standards The students will understand the consequences Students can resolve or deal with conflict in of personal actions as they relate to personal, acceptable ways. mental, and social health. Students can identify and assess the benefits, The student will understand the importance of a risk, and consequences of decisions and positive self-concept, interpersonal relationships, actions. and the relationships of sound social, emotional, Students can perceive issues and and mental health practices to wellness. circumstances from different points of view. Students know their roles and responsibilities as Key Concepts citizens in a democratic society. The learner will: 1. apply skills needed for conflict resolution. Teaching Tips 2. practice non-abusive behaviors with others. There are many ways to solve conflicts: there is 3. recognize appropriate socialization skills. never just one answer. Clearly state the rule for role 4. promote personal, mental, physical, and social playing before beginning to avoid problems. Instead health by determining skills to manage of grouping, teacher may want to do individual role- threatening behaviors of self and others. playing and compose his/her own situations. 5. respect individual and culture differences. 6. evaluate how personal actions affect others. Time 1 class meeting MCS Standard 1 Materials Students should be able to effectively demonstrate Conflict Resolution Skills Handout knowledge and skills for good mental, social, Homework Assignment Sheets emotional, and physical health and safety. Vocabulary Specific Expectation 5 Body language Communicate emotions, feelings, and ideas in Conflict resolution positive ways and demonstrate skills (collaboration, Self esteem negotiation, refusal, goal-setting, decision-making, and conflict resolution) for effective, responsible interpersonal relationships. INVESTIGATION Large Group Discussion and Role Play Begin the lesson by presenting students with the following scenario: You are standing in the cafeteria line. All of a sudden, Marcus walks up, pushes you, and screams in your face. “Get out of my way!” How do you prevent a conflict? What are your options? Allow students to respond. Lead students to discover several strategies as you list them on the board. You could: Compromise Take turns Share Apologize Use humor Avoid Get help, etc. Point out that different situations require different strategies. Which of these strategies would be the best use in this situation? Allow students to decide with your guidance. Introduce the Conflict Resolution Skills Handout and discuss all the steps. Allow students to ask questions. Make sure they understand the steps fully. Also, stress that we need to remember to: Watch your body language. Stand straight with your hands at your side. Don’t threaten the other person’s space by getting too close. Look at the person you are talking to and speak with a clear, polite voice. If possible, discuss your problem privately. APPLICATION Choose one or more of the following: 1. “I” Statements Materials: none It is very important that we learn how to effectively communicate the things that make us unhappy or cause conflict for us. This activity will help us learn how to do just that. Have all students practice “I” Statements. Example: 1. Say the name of the person…………………Mario, 2. Tell him/her how you feel…………………..I feel upset 3. Tell him/her you feel this way……………....when you pushed me. 4. Tell him/her what you want…………………Please don’t push me. Have students write out several “I” Statements for various situations. After students have written out their “I” Statements, have them practice the appropriate body language that should accompany their “I” Statements. Have them actually practice by making their statements directly to another student. Allow students to share the experience felt and what they learned. 2. Conflicts Are Banned Materials: Handout – Conflict Resolutions Skills and pencils Have students refer to the Conflict Resolution Skills Handout to assist them as they work to resolve the following conflicts: a. Your mom says you have abused your phone privileges. b. Your sister/brother won’t loan you any clothe to wear because the last time you borrowed something you returned it dirty. c. Your best friend is mad because you didn’t call him/her back like you promised. d. Your dad is upset because you didn’t clean your room as you promised. Allow students to share their solutions to the conflicts. HOMEWORK What Bugs You? Have students interview at least one friend and one family member to find out: What are some things that “bug” them? What do you do that “bugs” them? How can you change your Behavior? ASSESSMENT 1. List the 10 steps in Conflict Resolution Skills. 2. Give students a hypothetical situation involving a conflict. Have them write out an appropriate solution to the conflict. GLOSSARY 1. body language – postures, gesture, facial expressions, etc., which unconsciously give clues to what a person is thinking and may be used to emphasize verbal statements. 2. conflict resolution – the process of ending a conflict by cooperating and problem solving together. 3. self-esteem – the confidence and worth one feels about oneself; influences everything you do, feel, think, and are. Conflict Resolution Skills 1. Remain calm. 2. Set the tone. Avoid blaming. Avoid interrupting. Affirm others. Be sincere. Avoid put-downs. Reserve judgment. Avoid threats. Separate the person from the problem. Use positive nonverbal messages. 3. Define the conflict. 4. Take responsibility for personal actions. 5. Use I-messages to express needs and feelings. 6. Listen to the needs and feelings of others. 7. List and discuss possible solutions. Evaluate each solution: Will the solution result in actions that are healthy? Will the solution result in actions that are safe? Will the solution result in actions that are legal? Will the solution result in actions that are respectful of everyone who is involved? Will the solution result in actions that are nonviolent? 8. Agree on a solution. 9. Keep your work and follow the solution upon which you agreed. 10. Ask for the assistance of a trusted adult if the conflict cannot be resolved. TRADITIONAL AND Lesson 6.8 NOT-SO-TRADITIONAL Purpose Lifelong Learning Standards The student will understand different types of sexual Students can work with team members from orientations found in contemporary society. diverse backgrounds to accomplish group goals. Students can identify and assess the benefits, Key Concepts risks, and consequences of decisions and The learner will: actions. 1. know the differences between two sexual Students know their fundamental rights and orientations. understand how political decisions affect their 2. understand that society is made up of diverse daily lives. orientations regarding sexuality. 3. become more aware of how discrimination can Teaching Tips affect individuals who do not fall into the Be sensitive to your students since some of traditional category for sexual orientation. them may fall into the non-traditional category 4. understand that some family structures are for sexual orientation. based upon caregivers’ sexual orientations. Advise students to be sensitive to other students as well. MCS Standard 1 If a student discloses emotional turmoil about Students should be able to effectively demonstrate his/her sexuality, talk with the guidance knowledge and skills for good mental, social, counselor and refer the student immediately. emotional, and physical health and safety. Time Specific Expectations 2 and 5 ½ class meeting Assess one’s health needs and risk factors (e.g., Materials dietary practices, pathogens, heredity, Paper environment) and determine effective strategies Pencil for health enhancement and risk reduction. Communicate emotions, feelings, and ideas in Vocabulary positive ways and demonstrate skills. Heterosexual (collaboration, negotiation, refusal, goal-setting, Homosexual decision-making, and conflict resolution) for Sexual orientation effective, responsible interpersonal relationships. INVESTIGATION Large Group Discussion Begin the lesson with the explanation that there are different types of lifestyles and/or sexual orientations. List two types on the board. Give brief explanations/definitions for each category. Then ask the question, "What is the traditional sexual orientation in our society?" Have class brainstorm why this type is the more traditional lifestyle. Is it because the majority of the community is this? Do family values have something to do with this? Do religious values have something to do with this? APPLICATION Arrange students into groups of 3 or 4. Direct each group to designate a Leader, a Recorder, and a Referee. Discuss and record comments based on the following questions: 1. Do other social organizations have rules regarding sexual orientation? (i.e., military, corporations, professional sports organizations, etc.) 2. Why or why not? 3. How would you respond to a situation where someone you know is being ridiculed for his/her sexual orientation? ASSESSMENT Recorders report the group’s discussion to class. Have each group assess all individuals in the group on how each member contributed using the following rubric: 3 = Fully contributed to all questions 2 = Contributed to 2 out of 3 questions 1 = Contributed to 1 out of 3 questions 0 = No contributions noted GLOSSARY 1. heterosexual – a person sexually responsive to the opposite sex. 2. homosexual – a person sexually responsive to the same sex. 3. sexual orientation – one's natural preference in sexual partners; preference for same sex or opposite sex. ABUSE - WHAT IS IT? Lesson 6.10 Purpose Lifelong Learning Standards The student will understand the appropriate Students can work with team members from action to take when personal safety is diverse backgrounds to accomplish group goals. threatened. Students can identify and assess the benefits, The student will understand the importance of a risks, and consequences of decisions and positive self-concept, interpersonal relationships, actions. and the relationships of sound social, emotional, Students know their fundamental right and mental health practices to wellness. fundamental rights and understand how political decisions affect their daily lives. Key Concepts The learner will: Teaching Tips 1. examine behaviors that threaten person safety. Be sensitive to your students since some of 2. discuss assertive self-protection skills. them may have been abused. 3. review types of abuse and evaluate appropriate If a student discloses his/her abuse, talk with the resources for help. guidance counselor and refer the student 4. evaluate high risk situations and safety immediately. precautions involving sexual offenses, possible abduction, abuse or violence. Time 1 class meeting MCS Standard 1 Materials Students should be able to effectively demonstrate What Would You Say and Do? Discussion Sheet knowledge and skills for good mental, social, Paper emotional, and physical health and safety. Pencils Homework Assignment Sheets Specific Expectations 2 and 5 Assess one’s health needs and risk factors (e.g., Vocabulary dietary practices, pathogens, heredity, Assertive environment) and determine effective strategies Emotional abuse for health enhancement and risk reduction. Incest Communicate emotions, feelings, and ideas in Physical abuse positive ways and demonstrate skills. Sexual abuse neglect (collaboration, negotiation, refusal, goal-setting, decision-making, and conflict resolution) for effective, responsible interpersonal relationships. INVESTIGATION Large Group Discussion and Cooperative Learning Groups Organize students into cooperative learning groups. Define abuse- harmful treatment of another. List the five types of abuse on the board. Discuss definitions. physical – treatment leading to physical injury emotional – making another person feel worthless by “putting him/her down” sexual – sexual contact is forced on a person (touching private parts) neglect – failure to provide proper care and guidance incest – sexual abuse between family members Ask students who can be abused? Responses should include children, spouses, parents, and elderly people. Explain that today we are going to discuss sexual abuse of children. Have each group make a list of possible abusers. Share the lists orally making sure all types of people-male and female, family members, teens, neighbors, scout leaders, preachers, teachers, policemen, etc. are mentioned. Stress that all abusers are not “strangers standing in the shadows offering you candy.” Explain that no one has the right to touch private parts of your body. If someone tries to touch you in away that make you feel uncomfortable or you do not like – it is okay to say to say No! Stress that students should trust their own feelings. If you feel uncomfortable or you feel what is happening is wrong, then trust your feelings and use your own judgment to stop it. Discuss how abusers can gain access to children on the Internet. Ask the class if they are aware of this issue. Talk to class about how to avoid this form of abuse (i.e., stay out of chat rooms; only open email when you know who sent it; never give out personal information). APPLICATION What Would You Say and Do? Materials: What Would You Say And Do? Discussion sheets and pencils Divide students into small groups of 3 or 4 students. Have each group select one of the abuse situations from the discussion sheet. The group should devise a plan of action to address the situations. Groups should be prepared to share with the rest of the class. HOMEWORK Share your situation with your parents. Discuss. ASSESSMENT Have students role-play the above situations with appropriate actions for personal safety. Share the enclosed rubric with the students as they plan their role play. Allow for peer assessment as well as teacher assessment. GLOSSARY 1. abuse- harmful treatment of another. 2. assertive – standing up for one’s rights in a firm and positive way that also shows respect for the needs and opinion of others. 3. emotional abuse – making another person feel worthless by “putting them down.” 4. incest – any sexual activity between family members who cannot marry by law. 5. neglect – failure to provide proper care and guidance. 6. physical abuse – excessive use of force leading to physical injury. 7. sexual abuse – sexual contact that is forced on a person (touching private parts). What Would You Say And Do? 1. When Tonya goes to Samantha’s house after school, her mother is not home. Often Samantha’s brother, Dan, is there. He teases Tonya and wrestles with her in a way that makes her feel uncomfortable, even scared. What should Tonya do? 2. Louis frequently does lawn work for his neighbor, Mrs. Goodman. When he is done, she usually brings him some cookies and lemonade. Lately, she has wanted to come inside. She sits close to him on the couch and wants to show him pictures from her album. Louis is uncomfortable at how close she sits and how she touches him. What should you do? 3. LaToya is home alone. Her instructions are to never let anyone in the house while her parents are gone. A man in a gas company uniform comes to the door saying there may be a dangerous gas leak and he must come inside. What should you do? 4. Ben is walking home from school. Mr. Davis, a nice man from his church, offers him a ride and he accepts. Before long Ben feels uneasy at what Mr. Davis is saying and how he is trying to touch him. What should he do? 5. Every time Tamara stays after school to help her teacher, an older student from the high school corners her when she’s alone, scares her and makes her feel uncomfortable. What should she do? 6. Ricardo dreads going to visit his Aunt and Uncle every week because of the way his uncle always tries to get him alone and get close to him and touches him. What should he do? 7. Brittany and Jasmine are at Jasmine’s house looking at her My Space webpage. Brittany notices that Jasmine has several personal pieces of information posted – her full name, address, phone number. What should Brittany do? Assessment Rubric for Role Plays Distinguished – 4 points - The skit is exceptional. - The message is very clear. - Everyone speaks loudly and clearly. - The information and dialogue are appropriate for the audience. - The students worked together as a team. - All members of the group contributed. Proficient – 3 points - The skit is well done. - The message is clear. - Everyone speaks loudly and clearly. - The information and dialogue are appropriate for the audience. - The students worked together as a team. - All members of the group contributed. Apprentice – 2 points -The skit is average. - The skit does a poor job of communicating the intended message. - Some of the actors cannot be seen or heard loudly and/or clearly. - The information and dialogue may not be most appropriate for the audience. - There is evident that all of the students did not work together as a team. - Some of the members of the group contributed. Novice – 1 point - The skit is unacceptable. - The skit does a very poor job of communicating the intended message. - Most of the actors cannot be seen or heard loudly and/or clearly. - The students did not work together. Non-responsive – 0 points - No attempt was made ABUSE-WHAT DO I DO? Lesson 6.11 Purpose Communicate emotions, feelings, and ideas in The student will understand the appropriate action to positive ways and demonstrate skill take when personal safety is threatened. (collaboration, negotiation, refusal, goal-setting, decision-making, and conflict resolution) for Key Concepts effective, responsible interpersonal The learner will: relationships. 1. examine behaviors that threaten personal safety. Teaching Tips 2. discuss assertive self-protection skills. Be sensitive to your students since some of 3. review types of abuse and evaluate appropriate them may have been abused. resources for help. If a student discloses his/her abuse, talk with the 4. examine the causes and potential effects of guidance counselor, and refer to the student emotional, physical, and sexual abuse. immediately. 5. identify community resources available for victims of abuse. Time 6. evaluate high risk situations and safety 1 class meeting precautions involving sexual offenses, possible Materials abduction, abuse or violence. Paper 7. discuss the possible emotional effects of abuse. Pencils Homework Assignment Sheets MCS Standard 1 Students should be able to effectively demonstrate Vocabulary knowledge and skills for good mental, Exploitation social,emotional, and physical health and safety. Support people Specific Expectations 2 and 5 Assess one’s health needs and risk factors (e.g., dietary practices, pathogens, heredity, environment) and determine effective strategies for health enhancement and risk reduction. INVESTIGATION Review previous lesson reminding students that abuse is never the fault of the victim. Begin the discussion with the question: Why would someone abuse another person? Divide the students into small cooperative learning groups. Allow students to brainstorm this question within the groups. Discuss. Interject that often abusers were abused once abused themselves. Other reasons may involve drugs, alcohol, or mental illness. Explain that abusers are committing a crime and must be stopped. If no one is told – the abuser may keep doing it to others, and the abusers will never get help. Ask student how they think someone who has been sexually abused may feel (embarrassed, scared, guilty, angry, unclean, etc.). Could this cause emotional problems for them? Discuss. Have each group list people or places someone troubled about abuse could turn to. Answers should include family members, friends, school counselor, teacher, minister, clinics with doctors and counselors. Ask students what they would do if someone confided in them that they had been abused. Stress that this is something you don’t spread around and talk about to other friends. it may embarrass the victim. Also stress that a trusted adult must know. Tell students to convince their friend to tell a trusted adult so everyone can get the help they need. Next have groups write down behaviors that could threaten their safety and make them possible victims of abuse. Have the students share their lists. As groups share, question each group as to what a safer, smarter behavior might be in these situations. Summarize the lesson stressing the fact that victims usually will need some counseling. Help is available for victims and abuser. Think smart and avoid situations that may lead to problems. APPLICATION Dear Trusted Person… Materials: paper and pencil Conclude by having each group compose a letter where they confide in a trusted person about the abuse of a friend. HOMEWORK Discuss this information with your parents. ASSESSMENT Have students: 1. list places to go when you need to be safe; 2. name three people they can talk to about abuse, and 3. write three numbers to call (family, friends or professionals) if you are ever in trouble and need someone. GLOSSARY 1. exploitation – selfish or unfair use. 2. support people – trusted people in whom a child can turn in a crisis, such as family members, friends, and school personnel.