2007 Blog

Lively Days Blog Posts from 2007 www.livelydays.blogspot.com Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 03, 2007 First post of the new year Well, it’s a new year. With that comes the hope that this year will be better than the last. We’ll see... While there are things I’d like to do better or differently or change about my life in 2007, I decided not to make any “official” resolutions. Because it’s just way too hard to keep them! Leon and I didn’t do anything exciting for New Year’s Eve. We went out to dinner at a pub near our house called Old Bag of Nails. Then we came back home and watched Borat on DVD. I thought Borat was hilarious. I haven’t laughed that hard at a movie in a long time! I know there is a lot of controversy about this movie and how offensive it supposedly is. In my opinion, this movie is an equal-opportunity offender. Anyone and everyone could possibly be offended by something in this movie...but you can’t take it seriously. Two of my favorite scenes were the bed and breakfast one, where the “roaches” are shape shifters and Borat throws money at them, and the car dealership scene, where Borat asks if a certain type of “magnet” could be installed. :) If you’ve seen this movie, then you know what I’m talking about! Speaking of movies, Leon rented another one last night – Snakes on a Plane. I know this was supposed to be an action/drama-type of movie, but I couldn’t stop laughing! So many of the scenes were unintentionally funny. It was just really far-fetched and ridiculous, but what can you expect from a movie about snakes on a plane? It made an entertaining comedy anyway. ;) Well, I should get back to work. It’s hard to get back to the grind after having so many days off for the holidays! POSTED BY AMY AT 8:47 AM MONDAY, JANUARY 15, 2007 Rain and Muddy Pawprints I know I haven’t posted much lately. There really hasn’t been anything overly exciting going on to blog about! I wish it would stop raining. It’s rained every day for at least the past week, maybe two – I’ve lost track. It just seems like it’s been a long time since we’ve seen the sun. I prefer rain over snow, but a little sunshine would still be nice. We’ve had such a strange winter so far. We’ve had a few dustings of snow, but it’s been so much warmer than it usually is this time of year. It’s almost spring-like weather. We’ll probably get punished later on in the season with a blizzard in April! 1 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 The kids were with us over the weekend. Yesterday we met Leon’s mom and his sister Becky in Mansfield for lunch at the Cracker Barrel (Mansfield is the halfway point for both of us, between Columbus and Medina). The real reason of the visit was that Becky wants us to watch her golden retriever for a while. She has 5 dogs at home – Bailey the golden, Beethoven the German shepherd, Lassie the collie, and Sydney and Zoie the jack russell terriers. She also recently started fostering animals too, so she has a German shepherd mix at her house as well! Six dogs is a lot of work for a healthy person but for someone like Becky who has MS, I imagine it’s even more challenging at times. Even so, she absolutely adores dogs and I think she feels it’s her duty to save as many as she can. Three of her dogs (and of course the foster dog) are rescues. Bailey is the biggest dog Becky has. Male goldens are obviously larger than females. Bailey weighs about 115! (And we thought Goldie was a big girl at about 95 pounds!) Leon thinks that Becky may want us to keep Bailey indefinitely because he may be too much for her to handle anymore. He’s so strong, and unfortunately Becky isn’t as strong as she once was. I imagine it’s more difficult for her to walk Bailey and take care of such a large dog. If Becky asks us to keep Bailey, then of course we would. He’s her baby and we want him to stay with the family. But nothing has been decided yet – Bailey may only be with us a couple weeks, we just don’t know right now. I always wanted more than one golden, but now that we have two of them in the house I see it will take some getting used to! Bailey is about 4 years old, so he’s house broken and past the puppy stage. He still shreds stuffed animals or paper on occasion, but so does Goldie! I’m not sure goldens ever outgrow that. Goldie and Bailey get along well too. They both follow us around all the time though! Last night as I walked upstairs, I had Goldie on one side and Bailey on the other – and it’s not an easy task walking up the stairs with two big dogs on either side of you! Now that we have two dogs, I REALLY wish it would stop raining! It was bad enough with four muddy pawprints tracked across the carpet! Now we have eight pawprints to clean up after!! POSTED BY AMY AT 9:52 AM FRIDAY, JANUARY 19, 2007 Nothing good to say I haven’t had much energy lately. I know I’m just depressed about everything. I’ve been having a very difficult time dealing with Darlene’s cancer. She called me last night. She’ll be in Columbus on Monday because she’s getting radiation on the tumors in her pelvis. Hopefully they’ll shrink some, so she can be more comfortable. I’m going to see her after work on Monday. It will be the first time I’ve seen her in over two months. And I can’t help but think...will the next time I see her also be the last? The thought is so devastating to me. Darlene also asked me if I wanted anything of hers. She said that she is giving her things away and 2 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 getting everything in order. Which makes me think that she must sense there isn’t much time left. I told her I’d like the video we made when we were in Las Vegas back in 2000. She and I sang “Faith” in one of those karaoke booths and we bought a video of our performance. It was so funny. I couldn’t think of anything else when she asked me, but I e-mailed her this morning and said I would like one more thing – like a picture frame or something. I don’t care what exactly but I just want something to keep, something that is hers. I was talking to Leon about all of this, and I told him that I feel like a part of me is dying too. Because aside from my parents and my sister, Darlene is the only link to my past. I’ve known her since we were 12 – almost 18 years now. She’s the only person I’ve stayed in touch with from school. When she’s gone, I won’t have anyone to reminisce with about the past. She was with me in junior high and in high school and in college. All those memories...it seems like they will die with her. Because no one else will remember them but me. I’ve been very blessed in that I’ve never lost anyone really close to me, not since I’ve grown up anyway. My grandma died when I was 4, and I lost an uncle when I was 12 and another one when I was 15. But I’ve never had to deal with death on an adult level, when you can finally grasp the finality of it and how it will affect your life. I know it eventually happens to all of us. We can’t go through life without death being a part of it too. At any rate, you can see why I haven’t felt like posting much lately. I haven’t felt like doing much of anything lately, to be honest. We finally got the funds together to start our homestudy, but I still haven’t gotten all of the documents in order. I had hoped to send everything in to our agency at the first of January, and here it is almost a month later and I’m still not ready. I haven’t been able to concentrate enough to get things in order. Hopefully within the next week, I’ll finally be able to send everything in. So that’s what’s been going on in my life lately. I’m sure it’s very depressing to read, but unfortunately there isn’t anything happy to write about at the moment. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:32 AM FRIDAY, JANUARY 26, 2007 Winter found us This is going to be a long post. Just ramblings and musings on my part. You’ve been warned... ;) Winter finally made its way to Ohio. We’d had such a mild winter so far and I was loving it because I despise the cold. But the past couple weeks have been really chilly and we now have some snow on the ground that’s probably here to stay for a while. I knew we couldn’t be lucky enough to have spring-like weather all winter. Oh well. I scanned a few pictures of the kids in a while back and am just now getting around to posting them. The first one is Beth’s school picture from this year. The next two are pictures that the kids’ mom had taken of 3 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 them around Christmas. They look so grown up, don’t they? It’s hard for me to believe that Andrew will be a teenager in April! And Beth will be 12 this year! I met them when they were 5 and 6 so they’ve grown so much in the time that I’ve known them. Becky’s golden is still staying with us. It was hard to get used to two goldens in the house at first, but now I’m really enjoying it. Both dogs are so sweet and always want to be near us. I’ll have to take a picture of Bailey and Goldie and post it on here soon. We still don’t know for sure if Becky wants us to keep Bailey long-term. Right now it’s just a temporary situation. I saw Darlene on Monday evening. She was in Columbus because she had radiation earlier in the day to try and shrink the tumors in her pelvis. She wanted to go to dinner with all of these people she used to work with, so I met her at a Japanese steak house not far from where I live. I was pleasantly surprised that she felt well enough to go out to dinner. There were 11 other people there! So it was hard to talk to 4 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 Darlene about anything too personal. I sat beside her so I got to visit with her for a while. The whole time she’s had cancer, she’s never really looked sick. It’s no different now. She’s skinnier than I’ve ever seen her though. She said that she’s lost 50 pounds. She can’t walk long distances, but she was able to walk in the restaurant with a cane. Her spirits are still really good. She was laughing and joking around. I don’t know how she does it. Darlene said that her doctor doesn’t want to give up on her just yet. There’s a clinical trial at Ohio State that he wants her to try. He said he would get her information about this trial as soon as possible. Her doctor told her if this doesn’t work, then they could talk about hospice. That being said, Darlene is very realistic about all of this. Her doctor told her there is no cure for her type of cancer. At this time, it’s just a matter of prolonging her life. She’s had cancer for almost 3 years now. When her cancer spread in 2004, we weren’t sure she’d live through the year. She not only lived through 2004 but she lived through 2005 and 2006. When she stopped her experimental treatment, I wasn’t sure she’d make it through the beginning of 2007. But it’s almost the end of January and she’s still with us. That’s why it’s so hard for me to accept this sometimes...because just looking at her, you still wouldn’t know she has terminal cancer. I feel more encouraged after seeing her. I’m not expecting any miracles. To be honest, I’m not sure I believe in such a thing. But I think she’ll be with us longer than any of us expected and that’s a blessing. Speaking of miracles and all of that...I have to admit, I still struggle with my faith. I’ve struggled with it for years now. I want to believe in God. I want to believe there is someone there listening to our prayers, even if He doesn’t answer them in the way we expect. I want to believe there is some reason for all of this, that our lives are somehow meaningful and have purpose. I’d hate to think this is all just one big random mess and when we die, that’s it. On that cheerful note, I’ll end this and get back to work. ;) POSTED BY AMY AT 8:47 AM TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 06, 2007 Why does it have to be so cold?! Well, it looks like Bailey is going home after all. We’ve had him with us for about a month, and I’ve gotten really used to having two goldens around! It’s been great. Bailey is just as sweet as Goldie, and it’s been a lot of fun having him around. We’re meeting Becky and Leon’s mom on Sunday to give Bailey back to her. I’m really going to miss him! But I know Bailey needs to go back home to his mama. She misses him too. Leon took this picture of Bailey with his cell phone. He is such a cute boy! 5 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 Andrew and Beth have had the past two days off school because it’s been so cold. With the wind chill, it’s below zero. I despise this type of weather. You think I’d be used to it after 30 years, but I’m not. I’ve always said, I’d much rather be too hot than too cold! In case you’re wondering how the adoption process is going, well it’s temporarily on hold. Leon and I decided not to proceed with our homestudy until we can get more money saved up. We don’t want to get through our homestudy and then not be able to proceed to the next step or the next step after that just because we can’t afford to. It makes me sad to say that our goal of having Elena home by the end of this year was just wishful thinking. That’s not realistic for us financially. At this point, I don’t know the time frame. It's hard for me to be patient because patience is definitely not one of my virtues. This was a very difficult decision to make, but one we thought about very carefully. This just makes the most sense for us right now. I talked to Darlene last week. She was in the hospital again because she had hives. Her doctor assumed she was having an allergic reaction to one of her medications. She hasn't gotten any more information on that clinical study at OSU yet. Her voice sounded really good on the phone though. It amazes me that she always manages to stay so upbeat. I should get back to work! My bosses are in Orlando at a builders show this week, but I still have work to do. ;) POSTED BY AMY AT 12:27 PM FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 16, 2007 TGIF! I’ve been a very bad blogger lately! I’ve just been really busy and haven’t had much time to post. Work has been non-stop the past couple of weeks. We missed half a day of work on Tuesday and Wednesday because of the weather. We got several inches of snow those days, with ice on top of that. It was a mess. The highways/interstates/main roads have been cleared, but some of the side streets are still in bad shape. It’s not supposed to get any warmer, so I don’t think the snow will be melting anytime soon. 6 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog I am so ready for spring! 2007 My work has an exhibit in the upcoming Home & Garden Show, which runs from February 24 – March 4. I’ve been creating signs for that. I’m also accepting entries for our remodeling show, which takes place May 5-6, so I’ve had to coordinate all of that. And the magazine was due this week too. Our largest home show, the Parade of Homes, is in June so things will probably be crazy at work from now until the Parade is over! At any rate, I’m glad it’s Friday. The kids aren’t with us this weekend. I’m going to try and catch up on all of the TV shows that I record! We have a DVR, and I record shows almost every night of the week. I rarely watch them when they’re actually on. I watch them later so I can skip all of the commercials! The only shows I usually watch in “real time” are the Sunday evening shows that I watch with Leon – The Simpsons, Family Guy and American Dad. Here is the rest of my TV schedule: Monday: How I Met Your Mother, The Class, Heroes, What About Brian Tuesday: Law & Order SVU, Dirt Wednesday: (I can’t think of any shows I watch on this day!) Thursday: My Name Is Earl, The Office, 30 Rock, ER Friday: Las Vegas Saturday: Saturday Night Live I know of at least one more show I’m going to start watching. It premieres this Monday and it’s called The Black Donnellys. It’s easy to watch series when you can skip through all of the commercials! :) Leon and I are supposed to go to some birthday party for one of his clients tonight. I don’t even know the guy but oh well! Free food, right? ;) I wanted to do some more painting this weekend too. Our home needs so much remodeling done and it’s a constant work-in-progress! My sister and her fiancé are coming to Columbus on Monday because Julie is going to the Justin Timberlake concert with me! I can’t wait. :) I’m going to be so exhausted the day after the concert because it doesn’t start until 8:00 p.m. which means I probably won’t get home until after midnight. The next day at work we have a big trade show for our members, so I’ll have to work from like 8:00 a.m. – 10:00 p.m. :( Well, I better get back to work and wrap up my Friday. POSTED BY AMY AT 1:50 PM SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 25, 2007 Concert recap The weekends always go by so fast! Back to the grind tomorrow. I'm glad last week is over...it was so stressful! 7 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 The Justin Timberlake concert last Monday was fun but really long! Our seats were up high in the "nosebleed" section so the performers looked really small. Pink opened for Justin and played for about an hour. She was fun to watch. Justin came on maybe a half-hour after that and played for about an hour. Then he took a half-hour break, while Timbaland did something (I'm not exactly sure what you'd call it – he did "DJ type" things while videos played on a screen). Anyway, Justin finally came back out and performed for another hour. Julie and I thought he was finished, so we started to leave and then he came back on! We stood in the aisle and watched one more song and then left because we hoped to beat the traffic (that didn't happen). Justin is a good performer, but it was almost a sensory overload experience. He had his band and back-up singers and dancers on stage with him, along with screens and videos and a light show. It was difficult to actually find him on stage at times because there were so many people surrounding him. But I'm glad I got to see him. I still think he's a cutie! :) Julie and I didn't get back to my house until about 12:30 a.m. Her fiancé Jamie brought her to Columbus and stayed at our house with Leon while we went to the concert. They drove back to Coshocton afterward and didn't get home until about 2:00 a.m. (and Jamie had to go to work at 7:00 a.m!). Julie told me that she and Jamie have their wedding planned. They've already booked their flight and scheduled the wedding for Saturday, April 21 at St. Thomas in the Virgin Islands. It will just be the two of them. No one from my family or Jamie's family will be able to be there with them. It makes me sad because she's my only sister and I don't even get to be a part of her wedding. My mom is very upset about it. We just all wish they could get married somewhere closer so we could all be there for them. They plan to have a reception for family and friends once they get back home. Well, it's almost lunch time so I better go feed Andrew and Beth! POSTED BY AMY AT 12:35 PM THURSDAY, MARCH 01, 2007 Rainy, sleepy afternoon... I’ve been battling a cold the past couple of days. Leon was sick with this last week. I jinxed myself because I just stated that I hadn’t been sick all winter (knock on wood)...and less than a week later, I have a cold! I’ve been popping cold medicine and that stuff always makes me feel loopy. My brain feels fuzzy, like I can’t think straight, and it makes me sleepy even when I take the daytime formula. Oh well! I got a flu shot last fall, but I guess that doesn’t protect me from colds. I have an appointment with my hairdresser tonight. I go to see her every couple of months. Leon doesn’t 8 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 understand why I don’t go to a beauty salon where I can get a $9.99 haircut, but he doesn’t understand the relationship a woman has with her hairdresser! ;) It’s so hard to find a good one so when you do find one, you have to hold onto her! My gal’s name is Melody and I’ve been going to her for about 5 years now. I always get my hair highlighted because (gasp!) I’m not a natural blonde. ;) I’m thinking I may get a different haircut, one where I can leave my hair curly. As everyone probably knows by now, my hair is naturally curly and I despise it! I’ve been straightening it for about 8 years now. But it’s such a hassle to do that. And the slightest bit of dampness, rain, snow, humidity, heat, etc. sends my hair right back to its curly state. I don’t even know why I bother. I always wanted pin-straight hair, but I suppose we always want what we don’t have. My parents are planning to come to Columbus on Saturday and spend the night. I was hoping that my sister and Jamie and Leon’s brother John and his wife Karen could all come too, but they can’t. We’re trying to get a group of people to help us do some remodeling work on our upstairs hallway. We want to replace the door frames, doors and baseboards with modern-looking white wood as opposed to the Godawful 1980’s woodwork we have now. But it’s too much work to tackle that job unless everyone can be there. So we’ll have to try it again another weekend. I’ve wanted to do some remodeling forever, but it seems there is never enough time or money to get it done. I talked to Darlene today. I was worried about her because she hasn’t been returning my calls or responding to my e-mails. I finally got her to pick up the phone, and she sounded really out of it. I can only assume that she’s taking pain medication because she was slurring her words and not making much sense. I could tell from her voice how exhausted she is. She mentioned that the clinical trial her doctor had been trying to get her into at OSU had been cancelled. I didn’t talk to Darlene for very long because I wasn’t sure what to say. It’s so hard for me to talk about normal, everyday things with her because I feel guilty. I don’t want to tell her about something I have planned next month or this summer, etc. because who knows if she’ll be here then. I don’t want to seem insensitive. I better find some more caffeine before I fall asleep at my desk! Until next time... POSTED BY AMY AT 4:14 PM TUESDAY, MARCH 06, 2007 Time for hospice for Darlene I went out to dinner with Leon last night and when I got back home, there was a message on our answering machine from one of Darlene’s friends Sherri. I started shaking because I was sure she was calling to tell me that Darlene was gone – I have been expecting a call like this for so long now. I called Sherri back and found out that Darlene is in the hospital again because her pain has been so bad. The doctors have also decided that it’s time for hospice. Darlene might get to go back home today, and I 9 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 imagine hospice will start immediately so they can keep her comfortable. A couple hours later, Darlene called me herself. I could tell she was drugged up because she wasn’t making a lot of sense. She told me she was in the hospital. Then she told me that she hoped she gets to go home soon because she doesn’t want to die in the hospital. She said something about “It won’t be much longer.” I was speechless. I just have absolutely no idea what to say to something like that. Darlene was diagnosed with cancer in February of 2004 so she has fought long and hard for 3 years. She is in so much pain anymore and I don’t want to see her suffer like that. I only pray that hospice can make these final days/weeks as comfortable as possible for her. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:29 AM WEDNESDAY, MARCH 07, 2007 Visiting Darlene I saw Darlene last night. Her stepmom called me yesterday afternoon and said that I better come see her because they don't think it will be long now...probably within the next few days. I walked into her room and her dad, stepmom, brother, his wife and her friend Sherri were there. They were all crying. That really got to me. I'm not used to seeing men cry. I've only seen my dad cry a handful of times in my whole life and I've never seen Leon cry once in the entire 7 years I've known him. So to see Darlene's big, tough dad and brother cry, that really pierced my heart. It was very difficult seeing Darlene. She is heavily medicated and I'm not sure she even knew any of us were there. Her stepmom told me that Darlene has been in a lot of pain, particularly in her lower back and pelvis where the tumors are pressing on nerves. Her stomach and back are very swollen. She hasn't eaten for the past week and she no longer has control of her bladder. Since the tumors are pressing on nerves, her legs are numb and she can't walk anymore either. The tumors continue to spread and there is also one pressing on her heart now. Watching Darlene lying in the hospital bed last night, she was so restless. I wish she was able to relax. Her body kept jerking. You know how you're about to fall asleep and you suddenly startle yourself awake? That's what Darlene kept doing. She also kept pointing at the air and talking, but the things she said did not make sense. I know the meds she's on are making her brain foggy. She would open her eyes and look at us, but I don't know if she really saw any of us. She said things about making a cheesecake and a gun going "boom boom," and at one point she looked right at me and said "It's snowing out" (it wasn't). It was as if she was dreaming and talking in her sleep. She also winced quite a bit and would cry out. I hope the meds are strong enough to stop her pain. I don't 10 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 want her to suffer anymore. It's been 3 long years and I just want her to be at peace. Her dad and stepmom plan to take her home this afternoon and hospice will meet them there. I only hope they can keep her comfortable. For some reason, I keep thinking about 1997...where we were 10 years ago. In March of 1997, Darlene and I were living in our tiny, dorm-like apartment at the Newark campus of Ohio State. We were both in college then and Darlene worked at Pizza Hut. I keep thinking, we never dreamed that so much would change in 10 years...that Darlene would be dying in March of 2007. It's so heartbreaking. I have so many wonderful memories of Darlene. We've been best friends for almost 18 years, which is more than half of my life. We met in our 7th grade art class when we were 12 years old. She had just moved to our school and we rode the same bus. We both played the clarinet in band and we became inseparable by 9th grade. We had so much fun in band when we were in high school, going to football games on Friday nights and band competitions on the weekend. We ended up going to the same college and were roommates from the time we were 18 until I moved in with Leon when I was 24. We've been through so much together. I'm just so glad that I have all of those memories to hold onto. I know that other friends will come and go in my lifetime, but I can't imagine ever having another best friend. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:15 AM WEDNESDAY, MARCH 14, 2007 I saw Darlene again Leon, my parents and I went to see Darlene at her dad and stepmom’s house on Monday evening. Leon and I left work early and went to Coshocton to pick up my parents first. We didn’t get to Tim and Maureena’s house until almost 7:00 p.m. I’d never been to Freeport before. It’s a very small town, the kind where you blink and you miss it. It’s almost 3 hours east of Columbus, so it was a long trip for us. 11 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 Darlene was more conscious than she was when I saw her in the hospital. She woke up when we came in her room and asked how we were. She said “What’s new with you guys?” Then she fell back asleep. I just sat in her room and watched her sleep for a couple hours. She was restless and her body jerked a lot. She cried out a few times and her stepmom pushed a button that administers medication. She’s hooked up to an IV that provides a constant drip of pain medication, but there is also a button that Darlene or her family can push every 10 minutes to provide even more medication if the pain gets really bad. Hospice comes in the morning to clean her up and check on her meds. They try to position her in the bed so that she’s comfortable. She can’t sit up at all. She hasn’t eaten for almost a week and a half. She just lies in her bed and sleeps most of the time. When I was sitting with her in her room, I just wanted to shake her and say “No Darlene! Don’t leave us!” As if I have the power to convince her to stay. But I don’t want her to stay if she’s in such pain. I want her suffering to end so she can finally be at peace. We talked to Darlene’s family for a while before we left. Her brother Tim and his wife Jaclyn were also there as well as her stepbrother Jake and her mom Susan. Her dad told us that it will probably be 2-3 more days. When I kissed Darlene’s forehead and told her we were leaving, she said “Thanks for coming. Have a safe trip.” It was hard leaving because I knew that was very likely the last time I would see her while she’s still here. I keep my cell phone with me at all times because I’m constantly expecting to receive the call I’ve been dreading for three years now. I’ll post an update when I hear anything from her family. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:28 AM THURSDAY, MARCH 15, 2007 Is it spring or winter? I can't tell! I don’t have any news to report on Darlene right now. I haven’t heard from her family, so she is obviously still hanging in there. I just hope that her suffering ends soon. I wanted to comment on the weather. Tuesday was like spring! It was sunny and at least 70. Just a beautiful day. Yesterday it rained, but it was still warm. Today it’s much colder and right now it’s snowing! We have the craziest weather. I hope spring and more sunshine will be here soon because I hate dreary days. In case you’ve been wondering, I removed my adoption blog and fundraising blog from my profile for now. These blogs are still out in cyberspace and can still be viewed, but I feel almost guilty having them out there considering our adoption plans are on hold right now. There’s nothing new to report unfortunately. 12 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog I’ll certainly post an update if we ever have one. 2007 I’m working on a blog for someone else now too! One of Leon’s clients that he does computer consulting for has asked me to help her create a blog. She writes a column for one of our local newspapers and wants the blog to contain links to her articles. I started her blog yesterday and am actually going to her house tonight to discuss it with her and make any changes/additions that she wants. Here is her blog in case you’re interested: Balancing Act. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:56 AM SUNDAY, MARCH 18, 2007 Lazy Sunday On Friday, I got an e-mail from Darlene's stepmom Maureena, giving me an update. This is what she had to say: "She is about the same. Low body temp and blood pressure. Dr. was here today, she has a high heart rate. She has been able to rest most of the day. That is good for her. Lots of people are supposed to be here over the weekend. She gets tired easily." She ended by saying "We'll call you if anything happens." I haven't heard from anyone. I am just so surprised. I guess this is just typical Darlene though. She has hung in there so much longer than any of us ever expected. At the same time, it breaks my heart that she's still in pain. I have to admit, I feel guilty going about my daily life knowing what she's going through. Leon and I went out to dinner and a movie yesterday, and the whole time we were out I felt uncomfortable...as if I shouldn’t be doing these things, going about my life as if nothing is wrong. I feel that way when I laugh at something too...I’ll start to laugh at what someone says or something I see on TV, and it immediately occurs to me that I shouldn’t be laughing. I suppose maybe this is a common feeling that people have when a loved one dies or is dying. Leon and I went to see 300 yesterday. I’d heard so much hype about it and wanted to see if the movie lived up to it. We liked it. It was very graphic, but I guess I’m used to that kind of thing considering how much I love horror movies. Afterward we went to eat at Asian Star, which is a Chinese buffet. Now it’s Sunday and I don’t have anything planned for the day. We obviously don’t have the kids this weekend. I really need to clean the house since we have two dogs. I guess I forgot to mention that we’re doggysitting Bailey again. We went to Medina last weekend to celebrate Leon’s mom’s and his brother John’s birthdays. We took Bailey back with us again because Becky is working so much and has 6 other dogs to take care of. I don’t know how long he’s staying this time. He’s acting differently than he did the last time he stayed with us though. I don’t know if he misses his 13 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 mommy or what, but he seems sad. He goes into a room by himself and lies around and doesn’t seem to want to be around us. Maybe he’s just enjoying the peace and quiet since he’s used to being surrounded by 6 other dogs. The only downside is that it’s muddy outside right now, so Goldie and Bailey keep tracking in muddy pawprints! POSTED BY AMY AT 12:19 PM TUESDAY, MARCH 20, 2007 Nothing ever stays the same, does it? I’m still at work, killing some time, because I have a Twigs dinner to go to at 7:00 p.m. I’ve been reading back over my previous posts, and it amazes me how much things change in even a few months time. Just a few short months ago, I was talking about all of our adoption plans – and now it doesn’t seem like it will ever move forward. It’s indefinitely on hold for now anyway. In one of my posts from late last summer, I talked about meeting Darlene for lunch and going to the mall with her. She seemed healthy then, almost like the Darlene I used to know. Now she keeps hanging on and on. Who knows how long someone’s body can hold out? Last Monday, they said she’d be gone in 2-3 days. A week later, she’s still here. I wish I could find a happy place in this life and stay there forever. It’s too painful to move forward sometimes...especially when moving forward means leaving things behind. I’m in a depressed mood today obviously. Hopefully my Twigs dinner will cheer me up! We’re going to the new Bonefish Grill restaurant at Polaris. I better end this now, so I’m not late! POSTED BY AMY AT 6:29 PM THURSDAY, MARCH 22, 2007 Another rainy day I sent Darlene's stepmom another e-mail and this was her reply: 14 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 She has gotten a little worse every day. Yesterday she was actually saying little things all day. We now have a nurse here 24/7, and they are like the gestapo. Limiting the # and time visitors are here. They think she needs quiet to pass on. Thank god for them. She ended her e-mail by saying that she'd keep me posted. I'm torn about whether I should try to get back to see her again. I didn't think she'd be here more than a few days the last time I visited her. Part of me just wants to remember her how she was and not see her again, suffering like she is now. That's the hardest part for me, seeing her broken body lying there, but maybe that sounds selfish... The weather has gotten warmer, which is a nice change. Although it's thundering and lightening and raining here right now! I'd much rather see the sun. One of my co-workers who vacations in Seattle, Washington said that she heard that Ohio has more rainy days than Seattle! I don't know if that's true or not, but it does rain in Ohio way too much. I think my personality is much better suited for a dry, desert climate like Nevada or Arizona. Maybe I can retire in a place like that! We're having a chili cook-off at work this afternoon. Our members can submit their chili recipes and we have judges come in for a taste-test. This is the third one of these we've had, and we usually get about 100 of our members here. It really is a lot of fun, tasting all the different chili's. My boss said that he would be passing out Beano to everyone who attends this event! :) POSTED BY AMY AT 11:10 AM FRIDAY, MARCH 23, 2007 Darlene has passed Darlene's stepmom Maureena called me around 5:45 a.m. The phone ringing woke us up. We have caller ID so I could tell by the look on Leon's face who it was. Maureena took a deep breath when I answered and said "This is hard." I knew what she meant...hard to finally tell me what I've been expecting to hear for a long time now. Darlene passed around 4:30 a.m. Maureena didn't elaborate, but she said it was "easy." So hopefully that means that Darlene finally drifted away peacefully. Maureena said that she'd call me when they know the funeral arrangements. I haven't even cried yet since hearing the news. It's so strange, but I feel kind of like I'm in shock. I don't know how else to describe it. I called off work today. My co-workers all know about this so they'll obviously understand if I can't concentrate on work today. I imagine I'll be off Monday too if the funeral is then. I'm sure it will all hit me full-force later. POSTED BY AMY AT 6:25 AM 15 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 FRIDAY, MARCH 23, 2007 Darlene Marie Neff I found out that Darlene's family will be holding visitation services and a memorial service this Monday at a funeral home in Cambridge. I went to the funeral home's website for the address and directions, and I noticed that they have Darlene's obituary there. I called my mom and she asked me to read it to her (she doesn't have a computer at home). I cried the whole time I was reading it. It's so difficult to see these words written about Darlene. My mom called Maureena to find out more information. Maureena said that Darlene was alone with the nurse when she passed away this morning. Apparently, Maureena and Tim were sleeping. Darlene had been having difficulty breathing yesterday. The nurse said that she passed peacefully. It was Darlene's wishes to have a memorial service as opposed to a funeral. As an Ohio State graduate, she was a big Buckeyes fan so she wanted to have a Buckeye memorial service. Here is the link to her obituary online, but this is what it says: Darlene Marie Neff (January 5, 1977 - March 23, 2007) Darlene Marie "Angel" Neff, 30, of Freeport, died Friday (March 23, 2007) at her home after a courageous three-year battle with cancer. She was born January 5, 1977 in Cambridge, daughter of Susan (Adams) Neff and Tim Neff. Miss Neff was a Radiology Technician for The Ohio State University Medical Center of Columbus. Miss Neff was a 1995 graduate of River View High School. She was a 1999 graduate of The Ohio State University, where she received a Bachelor’s Degree in Allied Health Services. She was an avid Ohio State Buckeyes fan and a major promoter of the Buckeyes Football Boosters. She enjoyed scrapbooking and spending time with her family. She loved her pet cat, Tay-Tay, dearly. Miss Neff was preceded in death by her maternal and paternal grandmothers. She leaves her mother, Susan (Adams) Neff of Tallmadge OH; her father and step-mother, Tim and Maureena Neff of Freeport OH; three brothers, Tim (& Jaclyn) Neff Jr. of Uhrichsville OH, Jacob Phillips of the home and Sam Neff of Cambridge; a sister, Jenny (& Scott) Hickman of Cambridge; her paternal grandfather, Harold A. "Pete" Neff of Freeport OH; her maternal grandfather, Jerry Adams of Akron OH; and numerous nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles and cousins. Family and friends may call on Monday (March 26, 2007) from 2 p.m. to 7 p.m. at Thorn-Black Funeral Home, 139 S 9th Street, Cambridge. A memorial service conducted by her family and friends will follow on Monday at 7:30 p.m. Everyone is encouraged to wear the “Scarlet and Gray” of The Ohio State Buckeyes to the memorial service. Memorial contributions may be made to: Valley Hospice, 380 Summit Avenue, Steubenville OH 43952. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:55 PM 16 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 SATURDAY, MARCH 24, 2007 Comforting dream I dreamed about Darlene last night. I dreamed that I was lying in my bed, half awake/half asleep, and she was sitting on the floor beside the bed, holding my hand and talking to me. I remember thinking how healthy she looked and that her long, straight brown hair was back (her pretty hair was never the same after chemo). I woke up and my first thought was how much I'm going to miss talking to her. I don't remember what she said to me in my dream, but I was comforted by her presence. I just called my parents' house and I talked to my sister. Julie said that she heard that people who pass away come to you in your dreams to let you know they're ok. This thought made me cry so much. I don't know if I believe in dreams and all of that, but it's still such a nice thought...that maybe Darlene IS trying to tell me she's in a better place now and she is healthy again. Today's been a very hard day for me. I've cried much more than I did yesterday. I've received such nice e-mails and messages and calls from people, and I really appreciate everyone's support. It means so much to me. Thank you. Andrew and Beth are with us this weekend. Unfortunately, they never got the chance to know Darlene very well. It makes me sad that they have to watch me go through this though. I keep crying at unexpected times, and they'll hug me and try to cheer me up. I just feel bad because you hate to have your kids witness the bad things in life...you want to try and protect them for as long as possible. I just hope that Darlene's family is able to find some comfort. Even though Darlene was my closest friend, I still didn't get to see her and talk to her every day. Her family was with her every single day, and now there's going to be a huge void making it much more difficult for them to go on with their day-to-day lives. POSTED BY AMY AT 2:27 PM TUESDAY, MARCH 27, 2007 Darlene's memorial service was beautiful Ever since finding out that Darlene's cancer was terminal, one of my biggest fears had been seeing her in her casket. For some reason, the thought of that just about paralyzed me with fear. I thought I was going to have a panic attack before leaving our house for her memorial service yesterday. I was so scared to see her, and I was shaking and felt like I couldn't breathe. I'm so thankful for Leon's 17 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 support. He calmed me down and got Goldie and Bailey to give me kisses, which always makes me laugh no matter how sad I am. Darlene's service ended up being beautiful. She had wanted an Ohio State memorial, so almost everyone was wearing OSU clothing and/or scarlet and gray. Darlene looked absolutely lovely. Her cheeks were pink and she had some lipstick on, and she was wearing a lavender gown with a gray scarf. She also had dragonfly jewelry on since she loved dragonflies. She looked so peaceful. I touched her hand and she was very cold. That was the only thing that really bothered me about seeing her. Otherwise, she was beautiful. Darlene’s stepmom asked me if I wanted to say something during the service, but I declined. I told her I just didn’t think I’d be able to do that. It’s very hard for me to talk about her without crying right now. A few of her co-workers, some family friends, her cousin and her brother said some things about her. Some of the things people said made us laugh and others made us cry pretty hard. It was a very emotional service. I know Darlene would have loved it though. I could almost imagine her sitting there laughing and crying at everything people said. It was the perfect celebration of her life. She is being cremated today. She wanted her ashes spread somewhere in Clearwater, Florida. Darlene went to Clearwater for a vacation with her brother and his wife back in the fall of 2005, when she was in a brief remission from her cancer. She loved it there, so that’s where she wanted her ashes spread. I'm back at work today. It's been busy which is good because I could use the distraction. I've done pretty well today. One of my co-workers gave me a sympathy card and a little figurine with two angels. That made me cry. But other than that, I'm trying very hard to stay strong because I know that's what Darlene would want for her family and friends. POSTED BY AMY AT 1:38 PM WEDNESDAY, MARCH 28, 2007 In memory of Darlene Darlene collected dragonflies. I'm not sure when she started doing this, but I think it was before she got sick. It got to the point where she had too many dragonflies because people kept buying things for her! She had dragonfly picture frames, jewelry, lamps, posters, pillows, etc. etc. etc. So of course, when I see a dragonfly I think of Darlene. Yesterday, I ordered a very pretty framed print from art.com. When I get this picture, I plan to hang it in our bedroom. It makes me smile. 18 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 POSTED BY AMY AT 10:00 AM WEDNESDAY, APRIL 04, 2007 Not an exciting post It’s been almost two weeks since she’s been gone. It still doesn’t feel real most days. Nothing overly exciting to report really. We had beautiful spring weather the past week, and now it’s cold again today! The kids are on spring break this week. They went to Texas with their mom. They’re supposed to be back tomorrow. We don’t get to see them this weekend though because their mom gets to spend Easter with them this year. Leon and I are heading to Medina on Saturday and we’ll be there for Easter. We’ll drop Bailey off at Becky’s again. I think Goldie is ready for him to leave! She is very grumpy with him and growls and snarls a lot. It’s so funny because she’s the biggest baby in the world around people, but I guess she just doesn’t like other dogs. She’s too spoiled! My sister is still planning on getting married on April 21. She and Jamie have their flight, hotel and wedding ceremony all booked in St. Thomas. I wish I could be there with them. They are thinking about holding a small wedding ceremony when they get back home so that our families can watch them exchange their vows. They’re also planning on having a reception once they get back. Julie and Jamie found an apartment. They’re supposed to move in April 15. It sounds cute, although Julie said it’s pretty small (only 1 bedroom and 1 bath). It’s in Roscoe Village and the price is really reasonable. It’s only about 2 minutes from my parents’ house! Leon and I rent movies on a regular basis and usually watch several a week. We watched one on Sunday called Children of Men. I know this movie was critically acclaimed and Oscar-nominated, but I thought it 19 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 was the most depressing movie I’ve ever seen! Maybe I’m just not hip enough to get it. At any rate, I would not recommend it to anyone. POSTED BY AMY AT 4:27 PM THURSDAY, APRIL 05, 2007 Easter Humor POSTED BY AMY AT 3:09 PM WEDNESDAY, APRIL 11, 2007 Dreary days...will they never end? We visited Leon’s family up north for Easter and it was snowing there! It seems crazy to have snow on Easter. It’s still cold this week and rainy too. I’m ready for warm weather and sunshine again! We’re going to Coshocton to visit my parents and sister this weekend. I want to see Julie’s new apartment. I told her and Jamie that we’ll buy them something for their apartment as a wedding gift. They don’t really have anything so they’re starting from scratch! 20 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 This Friday will be 3 weeks. It still doesn’t feel real...it just seems like I haven’t talked to her in a while. I dream about her quite often. I’m not ready to "delete" her from my life – I still have her e-mail address in my contact list, her Yahoo ID on my Messenger list and her phone number in my cell phone. It stings every time I see her name, but I can’t bring myself to erase any of those things. POSTED BY AMY AT 4:55 PM MONDAY, APRIL 16, 2007 One sick puppy! Last Thursday evening, I came home from work to find a mess in our house! (*tmi ahead – you’ve been warned*) Goldie had diarrhea in several places in our living room and family room, and she had thrown up in the upstairs hallway! I know she couldn’t help it, but what a terrible mess! We still haven’t been able to get the stains completely out. Thursday night/Friday morning while we were trying to sleep, Goldie literally woke us up every hour crying because she had to go outside to go potty. By Friday morning, I was extremely worried about her! I know there’s been the recent pet food recall, but Goldie only eats Iams dry food and that hasn’t been recalled...and her treats don’t contain wheat gluten. She was such a sick girl though and I was worried she was going to get dehydrated! Leon took her to the vet on Friday and thankfully it was nothing serious. She had gastronitis (spelling??), and the vet prescribed her special food and pills. She’s eaten all her special food, but she has to continue taking her pills for another week. She kept spitting them out, so we finally put the pills on a spoon and covered them with peanut butter! That worked like a charm!! :) Her tummy has since gotten better, but she certainly gave her mommy a scare! I kept thinking ‘I’ve already lost one best friend, I can’t lose another!’ I know people who don’t own pets (like my parents) could never understand, but Goldie is literally a member of our family. I love her more than I ever thought I could love an animal! I like to say that Goldie is my first born. :) Leon and I truly think of her as our baby. Sometimes the thought of losing her scares me so much because I am so attached to her! She’ll be 7 years old this June. I only pray that she stays healthy and is with us for many more years! Leon and I went to Coshocton on Saturday and spent the night. We went to dinner at a restaurant in Roscoe Village on Saturday night. Afterward, we went to Julie and Jamie’s new apartment. It’s very nice even though it’s so small. But it will make a nice home for them to start out in. On Sunday, I took them shopping to buy them their wedding gift! They picked out a coffee table, an end table and three lamps. My parents are buying them a washer and dryer, and Jamie’s parents are buying them a couch. I’ll buy them something else (or just give them money) when they have their wedding reception this summer. Julie and Jamie leave this Friday for the Virgin Islands. My parents are driving them to the airport here in Columbus. Their flight leaves around 6:30 a.m. and they get to St. Thomas at about 1:30 p.m. (they’re in 21 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 the same time zone as us). They’re getting married Saturday afternoon on the beach. I’m sure it will be so beautiful. It makes me very sad that no one can be there with them. They’ll come home the following Friday. My mom is most likely going to have a reception for them in June, although she hasn’t set a date yet. POSTED BY AMY AT 2:21 PM TUESDAY, APRIL 17, 2007 Russia curtails American adoptions I was reading some posts on the message board of an infertility support group and there was a post about Russia stopping American adoptions for now! Here is the link to the article from USA Today: Russia curtails American adoptions It has been one stumbling block after another. I am very sorry to say that international adoption no longer appears to be the path for us. My heart goes out to all of those families waiting to adopt their children from Russia...and to all of the children in orphanages who deserve to be in loving homes! POSTED BY AMY AT 4:23 PM WEDNESDAY, APRIL 18, 2007 Our agency says "Russian adoptions are still open" This is what our adoption agency has posted on their website about Russian adoptions: 04/11/07 - Russian Adoptions Are Still Open! There have been several reports regarding adverse effects on international adoptions from the country of Russia - possible closures. EAC would like to stress that these confusing reports are simply pointing out the last of the agencies with accreditation have expired. As of today, there are no agencies with a current accreditation completing adoptions in Russia. The April accreditation expiration for these few agencies has no affect on the total overall Russian adoption process. EAC remains optimistic that we will receive our accreditation shortly. Please feel free to contact your consultant should you have any additional questions. Independent adoptions are still proceeding as before. So it appears that there will be a delay in the process, but hopefully the adoptions will proceed again 22 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 within a few months. I certainly hope so! I'd hate to think that people's options are limited when it comes to providing a child with a forever home. Every child deserves a family! POSTED BY AMY AT 9:00 AM THURSDAY, APRIL 19, 2007 Virginia Tech I am so terribly disturbed by the Virginia Tech situation. I can’t stop thinking about it. My heart goes out to all of the victims’ families and those people who were injured and traumatized by this horrible event. I watched the news last night and seeing those pictures and videos that Cho Seung-Hui sent to NBC was absolutely chilling. He was obviously a very disturbed young man, and it’s a shame someone didn’t get him the help he needed. I think the scariest thing about this situation is that it could happen anywhere. I went to Ohio State, which is a huge campus, and there isn’t a lot of security around (at least there wasn’t in the late 90’s when I was there). Someone could have so easily slipped into a building and started shooting just like Cho did. It doesn’t make you feel very safe! In one of the videos, they said that Cho called the Columbine killers Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold "martyrs." It seems to me that Cho felt invisible in his everyday life and wanted the sick recognition and notoriety that this has gotten him. It bothers me that some other disturbed individual is going to see these videos and pictures and decide that they want to be "famous" like Cho. They might even look up to him and consider him a "hero" in their twisted mind. There are so many horrible, senseless things happening everyday in this world! POSTED BY AMY AT 9:16 AM MONDAY, APRIL 23, 2007 Spring has sprung! One month ago today, Darlene passed away. It doesn’t seem possible that it’s already been a month. The weather has finally gotten nicer. We had a beautiful weekend. The kids were with us and they had all 23 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 kinds of things going on. Beth had a game night at her school on Friday, and Andrew had a friend spend the night. On Saturday afternoon, Beth had a soccer game. The kids had a musical at their church on Sunday. And Andrew had to referee two soccer games on Sunday afternoon. I also went to a candle party at my co-worker’s house on Saturday before Beth’s game. I cleaned the house on Sunday while Leon did yard work. We also went to Lowe’s yesterday and Beth picked out some flowers that she wanted to plant. Leon grilled hamburgers last night, and we ate dinner on our back deck. My sister and Jamie got married on Saturday. Julie Kirker is now Julie Bryan. She called me on Saturday night to tell me about it. They got married on the beach. It had rained earlier, but thankfully it stopped for their ceremony. It was just the two of them, the woman officiating the ceremony and another woman they found on the beach and asked to be their witness. Julie said that they didn’t video tape it, but their witness did take pictures. I wish we could have been there with them. Julie didn’t sound overly enthused with St. Thomas though. She said it isn’t as nice as it looks in pictures. The hotel they are staying in is older and a bit run-down. She said that overall, it appears to be a poor community. She also said that things are very expensive there (gas is $1 more than it is back home!). Everyone seems to be very friendly though and the ocean is beautiful. I can’t wait to see all of their pictures. Their flight comes in Friday night around 10:00 p.m. Andrew’s 13th birthday is this Thursday. I can’t believe I’ll have a teenage stepson! It makes me feel old! ;) (Although technically, if I had given birth to him I would have only been 16!) He’s hard to buy gifts for, so we let him pick out his own present on Saturday. He got a basketball video game for Xbox. POSTED BY AMY AT 10:00 AM FRIDAY, MAY 04, 2007 Yay for Fridays! It’s a beautiful spring day outside! I am so happy to finally have warm, sunny days again. The long, cold, wet winter months are so depressing. I haven’t posted much lately because I’ve been so busy at work. We have a condo tour going on now and a remodeling tour this weekend. And then the Parade of Homes starts on June 9th and runs through the 24th. It’s at a golf course community called Pinnacle in Grove City this year. Grove City is about a halfhour drive from work or from home, so I’ll be doing quite a bit of driving this year. Thank God my work reimburses us for gas mileage because gas is $3.19 a gallon right now! The kids are with us this weekend. They have another busy schedule. Andrew will be refereeing 3 soccer games on Saturday morning, and Beth has soccer games on Saturday and Sunday. Andrew is growing up so fast! He asked his mom if he could date. She said only group dates for now because after all, he’s only 13. When I picked Andrew up last night he told me that there’s a girl in his class that he wants to ask out! :) 24 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 A remodeler is coming out to our house tomorrow afternoon to look at some jobs we have and to give us an estimate. For the longest time, we were going to do these jobs ourselves but we’ve been in our house for almost 4 years already and still haven’t had the time to get the work done. We want to replace all of the baseboards, door frames and doors in our house with white wood. We have this dated, 1980ishlooking dark wood now and I hate it. We also need some painting and wallpapering done. We eventually want to get new carpet too. I still haven’t gotten the stains out of the carpet from Goldie’s accident a few weeks back! Leon and I went with my parents to the airport last Friday night to pick up Julie and Jamie. Their flight was delayed and they didn’t end up getting in until about 11:00 p.m. They were both a nervous wreck because apparently they’d flown through some bad weather and had a really bumpy ride. Sadly, they didn’t really have a very nice time on their honeymoon. They obviously stayed in a lessexpensive part of St. Thomas, and they said that they never felt safe the entire time they were there. They had this fear of being mugged. They said everything was run-down and poor-looking, and the only thing they really enjoyed was the ocean. They said it was a very pretty blue color. I still haven’t seen any pictures from their wedding yet. I think my mom is going to have a reception for them in June, although no one has picked a date yet. Well, I better get back to work. TGIF! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:22 AM THURSDAY, MAY 17, 2007 The Big 3-0 Today is my 30th birthday, and I had an interesting start to my day – I was in an accident on the way to work! I was on I-270, not too far from the exit I need to take to get to work, and everyone slammed on their brakes for some reason. It was raining, but I still don’t know what caused everyone to stop fast. I managed to stop, but the guy three cars behind me didn’t and he hit the guy in front of him causing a chain reaction. There were four of us involved in this accident, although someone a few cars in front of me also hit the person in front of him. So there were a total of six cars damaged as a result of everyone slamming on their brakes! It took about an hour for the police to get there. Two ambulances came, but thankfully no one was seriously injured. The back of my head hurts a little from hitting it on my head rest and my lower back aches some, probably just from the impact. Thank God for seat belts! I always wear mine and I know I would have been hurt worse if I hadn't been wearing it. All of the drivers involved had to fill out paperwork. The cop told me I’d receive an accident report in the mail in a couple days, so I can find out who the other drivers were. I already called my insurance company. I decided I’ll deal with the insurance company of the guy who hit me in order to get my car fixed. I can still drive my car. My bumper on the left-hand side is pretty damaged and has a hole in it. I’ll 25 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 have to wait until I get the paperwork in the mail to find out who I need to contact to get my car fixed. It’s ironic because I was in a similar chain reaction on 270 on May 18, 2004! There must be something about 270 and my birthday. I wasn’t cited then and I wasn’t cited for this accident either since I didn’t hit anyone. It’s still going to be a pain to have to get a rental car and wait for my car to be fixed and all of that. I’m just very glad that no one was hurt because cars drive fast on 270! But since we were near an exit ramp, most of the traffic in the lane I was in had slowed down. Anyway, I was obviously late for work. We always get cake on our birthday at work. One of my co-workers went to pick up my cake, and we’ll have a little celebration in about an hour. I picked out a Boston cream pie. We’re not going to celebrate my birthday at home until tomorrow night because the kids are so busy tonight. Beth has a soccer game, and Andrew has an event at his church. We’ll probably go to dinner at our favorite restaurant, El Vaquero’s, tomorrow night. My parents, sister, her husband and my grandma are all coming to our house on Sunday, and we’re having a cook-out then to celebrate my birthday too. I’ve been so busy at work lately that I haven’t been a very good blogger. We have our big home show in June, so everything is pretty crazy right now. I’m always glad when June is over. It’s not that I feel old...but turning 30 bothers me a little. I think it’s because I’m not where I wanted to be in life at age 30. I always imagined I’d be a mom by now, so it definitely stings that I’m still not. And I’ve really been missing Darlene the past few days. I wish she was here to celebrate with me. We always took each other out to dinner to celebrate our birthdays. I think about her all the time. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t wish I could go back in time and be with her while she was still well. I wish I could warn her to get checked for cancer long before she ever knew she had it...I wish I could have prevented it and saved her. Well, I suppose I should get back to work now. I need to grab some lunch and get ready for my Boston cream pie! POSTED BY AMY AT 12:08 PM MONDAY, MAY 21, 2007 Starting another work week We had such a busy weekend. Beth had a soccer tournament so she had four games, two on Saturday and two on Sunday. Andrew had to referee three games on Saturday morning, and he had a band concert on Sunday. My family came to visit yesterday to celebrate my birthday. We grilled hamburgers and ate on our deck. Although it rained off and on, it warmed up. It was very chilly yesterday morning when we went to Beth’s first game. It’s a little cool outside today, but the sun is out. I was at a golf course this morning helping with check-in because we have a membership golf outing going on today. I’m back at the office now though. I’ll be in 26 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 the office for a couple more weeks, and then I’ll be out at the Parade of Homes almost every day during the month of June. I cleaned the house on Saturday. I despise cleaning. I’m a terrible procrastinator when it comes to doing this. There’s always something I’d rather be doing! If I tidied up a little bit every day, it would be so much easier. Instead I let things pile up and when it finally comes time to clean, it’s an overwhelming task. I wish we made enough money to hire a cleaning person! Maybe someday. Leon’s brother John and his wife Karen are planning to stay with us this weekend. Leon said that he and John would finish drywalling the garage, a project they started about two years ago. We have so many half-finished remodeling projects in our house. John took the wallpaper down in our half bathroom six months ago, and we’ve never gotten new wallpaper hung yet. It drives me crazy. I hope we can get some of this unfinished work done soon! When I was in the accident last Thursday, the police officer told me that I’d receive paperwork in the mail with the names of the people involved in the accident, including the people who were cited so I could contact their insurance company. I still haven’t received anything. It’s frustrating! I don’t know how to find out who hit me. The accident report is not posted online yet. I’d like to get my car fixed as soon as possible. I hate driving around with a smashed bumper. I ended up going to my family doctor last Friday to make sure everything was ok. My back, from my waist all the way up into my shoulders, started getting really sore later in the day on Thursday. I wanted to be sure I had any injuries documented for insurance purposes. My doctor told me I have a mild case of whiplash. He just told me to take ibuprofen and come back in two weeks if the pain is still there. I’m sure I’ll be fine though. I don’t feel nearly as sore as I did last week. POSTED BY AMY AT 12:38 PM TUESDAY, MAY 22, 2007 Change of plans I haven’t shared this with many people, but Leon and I have decided not to pursue adoption at this time. It wasn’t an easy decision for us by any means, but things were not progressing for us. We ran into some financial problems because our agency increased the foreign program fee by $2,000. In order to continue the process, we would have to switch agencies and find one that charges less. But then we found out that Russian adoption is currently closed for Americans. I hope this is only a temporary situation. My heart breaks for all of the children in orphanages over there who have to wait while their government makes up their mind about re-opening adoptions for Americans. At any rate, Russia was the only place we really had our heart set on for adoption right now. We truly believed we were on the right path, but things happen for a reason and all signs were showing us that this may not be the path for us. International adoption seems a little scary right now. From what I’ve heard, China has approximately a two-year wait to receive a referral. And Guatemala is not currently complying with something called the Hague Convention which could affect future adoptions for Americans from that 27 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog country. 2007 I realize that there are children in the United States who need adopted. But for our own personal reasons, Leon and I never felt comfortable with domestic adoption. I’m still a very strong supporter of adoption and I think it’s a beautiful way to grow your family. I hope that someday we’ll get the chance to follow the original path we set out on. But for the time being, we have decided to start fertility treatment again...because I still want to be a mom more than anything in the world and treatment is the only way for us to make that a reality right now. I was so reluctant to start treatment again. I did three rounds of Clomid back in 2004 and was so emotionally drained afterward that I vowed not to continue. It took three years and dashed adoption dreams for us to start treatment again. We’re going to the same reproductive endocrinologist (RE) that we went to back in ‘04. He had me do a round of Clomid in March, and I didn’t ovulate on it this time either. From the research I’ve done, women with polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) are often resistant to Clomid. In April, I did my first round of injectible fertility drugs called Gonal-F. Miraculously, I ovulated on Gonal-F – which may be the first time I’ve ever ovulated in my life! So I’m thankful for that, but unfortunately I didn’t get pregnant on that round. That was a difficult month for me emotionally because I truly had convinced myself that I was pregnant. I did a second round of Gonal-F this month. I had my first IUI (intra-uterine insemination) on Saturday morning. I have to have my blood drawn on Friday to find out if I ovulated. I sure hope I did because the IUI cost $326! I have insurance through my work and through Leon’s work. Although my insurance pays nothing for fertility treatment, Leon’s has paid on some of the appointments where I had to have ultrasounds and bloodwork. Neither insurance pays for fertility drugs, but our clinic referred us to Freedom Drug which offers discounted meds. So...long story short, all we can do now is wait. And hope that one of these treatments works for us. POSTED BY AMY AT 4:59 PM WEDNESDAY, MAY 23, 2007 My car may be getting fixed soon! I finally talked to the insurance company of one of the people involved in the accident. This company represented the third car in the pile-up (I’m considered #1). The man I spoke with on the phone said he was investigating the accident and he took my statement. He’s coming to my work tomorrow morning to take a look at my car. He couldn’t verify whether his company would pay for the damages to my car or whether #2 or #4 would be responsible. I hope these insurance companies figure out what they’re doing quickly because I want to get my car fixed! 28 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 I must have had ten messages on the answering machine at home this week as a result of the accident! People like lawyers, doctors, chiropractors and body shops have been calling me. I also got four letters in the mail yesterday from lawyers. Each one of them included a copy of my accident report in their letters so at least I finally have a copy of this! I have to admit, I’ve been very paranoid driving since the accident – especially on 270 where the accident happened. I drive really slowly when I’m trying to exit and I leave a lot of space in front of me. I keep looking in my rearview mirror and I get scared because I think the person behind me is too close and will hit me if I have to stop quickly! I hope this paranoia passes because I don’t like being scared to drive. I’ll have to take a picture of my bumper and post it on here. Leon gave me a brand new pink digital camera for Christmas, but I’ve rarely used it because it didn’t have very much memory. So Leon and the kids gave me a memory card for my birthday, so now my camera will hold hundreds of pictures. I’ve been playing around with it, taking all kinds of pictures around the house. The weather has been really warm this week. Leon turned on the air conditioner in our house. He said he wants to keep Goldie cool during the day since she has a fur coat! I’m just happy that our summer weather finally seems to be sticking around. Andrew has a band concert at his school tonight, so Leon and I are going to that. The kids are almost finished with school – their last day is June 6 (which also happens to be Leon’s 38th birthday!). The kids’ mom hasn’t verified yet, but I believe they’ll be staying with us the second half of the summer this year. I think they come to stay with us sometime after the Fourth of July. Leon’s brother John and his wife Karen are coming over on Friday and staying with us through Monday. We haven’t seen them since Easter so it will be nice to visit with them. They’re really nice people and a lot of fun to be around. I always say I’m very lucky because I actually love my in-laws! Leon’s family has always been good to me. POSTED BY AMY AT 2:06 PM THURSDAY, MAY 24, 2007 My bumper I took a picture of my bumper this morning. Here it is: 29 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 A representative from the insurance company of car #3 met me at work this morning around 8:00 a.m. and looked at my car. He told me that he thinks they will be responsible for paying for my car, although they’re still trying to figure out if car #4 will need to reimburse them for any of the damages. The rep told me to take my car to a body shop to get an estimate and have them fax the estimate to him. Then they’ll issue a check to pay for the damages and will also pay for me to have a rental car. I plan to take my car to the same shop I did last time I got hit. Hopefully I can drop off my car sometime tomorrow or on Saturday if they’re open. I hope it doesn’t take too long to get this taken care of! By the way, here is what my pink digital camera looks like: POSTED BY AMY AT 9:13 AM SATURDAY, JUNE 02, 2007 Weekend I was very busy at work this past week, even though it was only a four-day work week! The Parade of Homes starts on June 9, so the phones were ringing off the hook. I'll be out at the Parade site every day next week helping with set up. The Parade is in Grove City this year which is about 20-30 minutes from my side of town. I heard it's supposed to cool down some next week, which will be good since I have to be outdoors the whole time. I just hope it doesn't rain! I can't tell you how many Parades I've had to work where it has poured on me! We were very busy last weekend too with John and Karen in town. Leon and John got a lot of work done in our garage. They started drywalling our garage about two years ago, but never finished it. Last weekend, 30 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 they sanded and primed the walls. It's looking really good. John is supposed to come back next weekend to help finish sanding, do a second coat of primer and then paint the walls. Leon's sister Tammie is planning on coming with him, and she's going to hang some wallpaper in a couple of our rooms. The kids are with us this weekend. For once, they actually don't have any events going on! They both got to sleep in which is quite a change for them. Their last day of school is this Wednesday. It's hard to believe that Andrew will be in 8th grade next year and Beth will be in 6th. Beth had to try out for the soccer team she was on for next season. She just found out this morning that she made the team, so she's really happy about that. One of her friends is coming over this afternoon, and they want to go swimming. I'll probably have to take them because Leon has to drive Andrew to the movie theater....he's supposed to have his first date today! It's scary to think these kids are getting old enough to go on dates! I still haven't gotten my car fixed. I got an estimate done on it last Friday, and the repair shop faxed the estimate to the insurance company. But when I tried contacting the insurance rep this week, his messages said he was out of the office until Monday. If this is anything like the last time I got hit and had to get my car fixed, this won't be a quick process. I talked to my mom this week, and she wants to have Julie and Jamie's reception on Saturday, July 21. We'll see if that pans out. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:29 AM SUNDAY, JUNE 10, 2007 Too busy to post much I know I haven't gotten the chance to post much lately. This past week was non-stop at work. I've been at the Parade site every day for the past 7 days. The week before the Parade opens is crazy. There's so much to do to get the site ready for the public. We had a preview party on Friday night, and then the Parade officially opened yesterday and runs through June 24. I get to be in the office every day this week because I have to work on the magazine. I'm so happy about that because I get really burnt out being at the Parade all the time. To be honest, I can't wait until June is over. This is definitely my least favorite time of year at work. Leon's birthday was last Wednesday. He's 38 now. The kids and I took him out to eat dinner at a Chinese buffet. Our favorite restaurant, El Vaquero's, is currently closed. The sign says they are remodeling their kitchen and are supposed to open in a week, but Leon thinks they got shut down for immigration reasons. Whatever the reason, I sure hope they get it sorted out and re-open soon! Leon's brother and sister were supposed to come over this weekend, but that didn't end up happening. I was at the Parade until about 6:00 p.m. last night, and then Leon and I went to eat at Outback for dinner. I had to work at the Parade until 4:30 p.m. today. Leon and I went to the movies when I got home and 31 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog we saw Hostel: Part II. We didn't like it as much as the first one. 2007 I have to drop my car off at the repair shop in the morning before work. The insurance guy finally coordinated my repairs and rental car. Hopefully it only takes 2-3 days to fix my bumper. I'm just glad I'm finally getting it fixed. It's embarrassing to drive around with a smashed bumper. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:10 PM MONDAY, JUNE 18, 2007 Hot summer days I get to be in the office this week until Friday, and then I have to close the Parade that night. I’ll probably have to work there this weekend too since it’s the last weekend and will probably be very busy. Thank goodness it’s almost over for another year! ;) John and Karen and Leon’s sister Tammie came over this weekend. John and Karen worked more on our garage, and it looks great. The only thing left to do is paint the walls. The drywall is up and everything has been sanded and primed. Tammie hung wallpaper in our half bathroom. She did a great job! It’s so wonderful to finally have that bathroom finished after being torn up for 6 months! Tammie said that she’ll come back soon and do some painting for us. We decided we’ll probably try to get our family members to help us do our remodeling jobs around the house. We had a remodeler give us an estimate on the work we wanted done, but it’s a little higher than we’re willing to pay. We could do the work ourselves so much cheaper if we can only find enough family members to help! The kids were over this weekend too. June is a quiet month for them, which is a relief after months of activities and crazy schedules! They’ll be coming to stay with us for the second half of the summer in a couple more weeks. Beth and I took Goldie for a walk around our neighborhood yesterday. We walked much further than we originally intended to! We were worn out when we got back home. It was so hot out yesterday. Poor Goldie panted and panted in order to get cooled off. I finally turned on the fan and had her sit in front of that to cool her down. It’s probably not a great idea to take your dog for a walk in 90-degree weather! We’ve certainly had hot, dry weather so far this summer. I love it! I hate the cold and I hate the rain, so this is my kind of weather. Although the grass is really dry and the flowers aren’t doing too well in this kind of weather. It seems like it’s much hotter than usual for June. This is typically the type of weather we have in July. I didn’t get to see my dad for Father’s Day. I called him though. I haven’t seen my family in a few weeks. Hopefully we can get together with them soon. Mom is still planning to have Julie’s reception on July 21, 32 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog although they still haven’t picked a place to hold it yet! 2007 I got my car back on Friday. I’m glad to have it back. My rental car was a Saturn Aura, and I wasn’t really too impressed by it. The seats in the back sat much higher than I’m used to so it made it hard for me to see out the back window. I felt like I constantly had a blind spot and that bothered me. Even though I’ve always liked my car, if I had more money I’d buy a new one. It would be great to have four doors. Two doors is just not practical. But my car has been paid off for over a year, and I love not having car payments. My car is a 2001 model, so it’s almost 7 years old. It’s hard to believe I’ve had it that long already. Speaking of 7 years, Leon and I met 7 years ago in May. It’s also hard for me to believe that we’ve known each other that long already! Those 7 years have really flown by. Our 5-year wedding anniversary will be this October. I’m struggling over whether I should just let my Mary Kay status expire. Unfortunately, I learned that I’m not a good salesperson. I haven’t sold hardly anything over the past year. I’ve sold the most products to myself! ;) I really do like Mary Kay and that 50% discount I get is great. But I have to buy $400 (which turns out to be $200 with my discount) worth of products every 3 months in order to keep that 50% discount. My discount expired in May, and I haven’t placed another $200 order yet. I might place one more big order in July and stock up on the things that I like. And after that, I’ll close shop. I tried and I failed. Oh well. ;) POSTED BY AMY AT 11:23 AM WEDNESDAY, JUNE 20, 2007 Almost three months... This Saturday will be three months since Darlene has been gone. Some days it feels like that time has passed very quickly. Other days it feels like the time has gone by so slowly. Three months is a long time not being able to see her or talk to her. I still think about her every day. I imagine I always will. Just the other night, I cried because I was missing her so much. Some days are still harder than others. Certain things will stab me in the heart and catch me off guard. Someone mentioned recently how they were going out to a movie with their best friend, and that stung. I miss going to the movies with Darlene and having dinner with her and just hanging out with her. I miss having a best friend. I try to take it one day at a time. It’s hard to explain, but if I tell myself I won’t be seeing Darlene today it makes it easier to accept. But I can’t tell myself that I’ll never see Darlene again in my lifetime because then it becomes overwhelming and much harder to deal with. I still try to make sense of her life and death, but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to do that. I was telling Leon the other night about an incident in college. Darlene was working at Target and apparently one of 33 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 her co-workers began to choke while they were eating in the break room. Darlene already had medical training by then since she was studying to be an x-ray tech. She gave this woman the Heimlich maneuver and saved her life. I hadn’t thought about that story in quite a while, but for some reason it popped into my mind the other night. I have no idea who the woman even was that Darlene saved. But I wondered...was one of Darlene’s purposes in life to save this woman? Is this woman someone important? But Darlene was someone very important to all of us too and she’s still gone. Talking about her is making me very emotional and I’m at work, so I better end this post now. I hope she knows how much she was loved by everyone whose life she touched. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:25 AM TUESDAY, JUNE 26, 2007 Finally sharing our news… I am so grateful to finally be able to say I'm pregnant. The round of treatment that we did in May worked. You may remember from a previous post that I took injections called Gonal-F as well as a shot of hcg. On May 19, I had an IUI. This is most likely the day that we conceived. My doctor told me that if I hadn't started my period by June 5, I should take a home pregnancy test. I thought about testing the morning of June 5, before I went to work, but I was absolutely terrified. I just wasn't sure my heart could handle seeing another negative test – aka one line. I went to work and decided I would test that evening if my period still hadn't started. I got home around 5:30. Leon told me he wouldn't be home until almost 6:30. I couldn't take the suspense any longer. I went in the bathroom, took the test, and then went into our bedroom to lie down and wait the dreaded 3 minutes for the results. I decided to wait 4 minutes for good measure. It was exactly 5:55 when the 4 minutes were up. While I was lying on the bed, I had to try and calm myself down. I actually felt like I was having a mini panic attack. My heart was racing in my chest and I felt like I was hyperventilating. I forced myself to go into the bathroom at 5:55 and look at the test, which I had laid on the side of bathtub. I actually fell to my knees when I saw two lines and I started saying "Oh my God." I know I must have said this several times because Goldie came into the bathroom to find out what was wrong with me. I instantly started shaking and crying. My head was in a fog...I just couldn’t believe that this was finally real. I called Leon right away. He initially thought something was wrong with me because I was crying. He claimed he wasn't all that surprised...our numbers had been really good for this cycle, and he had faith all 34 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 along that this would work. Afterward, I called my parents and I told my mom. She started crying too. I talked to my dad, and then I called my sister. My family was absolutely thrilled. I went down into the living room (of course I took the test with me!) and I sat on the couch and waited for Leon to get home. I couldn’t stop staring at the two lines! I looked at that test all night. Before bed, I took another test just to be sure I would see two lines again. Sure enough...two lines. I had my blood drawn the morning of June 7 to check my hcg levels. My doctor's assistant called me that afternoon and confirmed my pregnancy. My levels were 250 that day. She scheduled a repeat beta for June 11 to make sure my levels were rising. When you're pregnant, your hcg levels are supposed to double every 2-3 days (these levels eventually taper off in later pregnancy). My numbers on June 11 were 1,091, which means my levels were rising just like they were supposed to. Once my pregnancy was confirmed by the doctor, we told Leon's family. We also told Andrew and Beth a couple weekends ago. I think it's going to take some time to sink in for the kids. It probably came as quite a shock to them since they had no idea we were even trying to have a baby all these years. So far, I haven't had any morning sickness at all which surprises me! I've been very tired though and I fall asleep pretty early every night. Sometimes I get so sleepy during the day at work I don't know how I’m going to survive until 5:00. I also have to pee quite a bit! I wake up at least 3 times a night (if not more) because I have to go to the bathroom. I haven't had any food aversions, but I've craved certain foods since almost day one. Everything from pink lemonade to mashed potatoes to cottage cheese to Chinese food (Panda Express chow mein has become a weekly staple!). Overall, I feel really good though. My first ultrasound was today. Everything looked perfect. We could see the baby's heart beating on the screen. I started to cry when I saw this. It was the most beautiful thing that I have ever seen in my life. The doctor was even able to let us listen to the baby's heart beating! It was so incredible. I am still in awe. I found out that I'm currently 7 weeks 2 days pregnant, and my due date is February 12. I'm just so unbelievably thankful and grateful for this pregnancy. I cried so many times over the years, praying for the day I could finally be a mommy. I can't give enough thanks for this little one. Here is one of his/her first baby pictures... POSTED BY AMY AT 4:12 PM 35 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 THURSDAY, JUNE 28, 2007 I Would Die For That Someone in the infertility support group I’m a member of posted a link to a song called "I Would Die For That." The song has a country sound, which I’m normally not a fan of. But the subject matter of this song is so moving that all I could do was cry as I watched the video. It’s by an artist named Kellie Coffey. Anyone who has gone through infertility or losses will be so touched by this song. And even if you haven’t suffered from those things but you know how much it means to be a mom, then I’m sure you will still be deeply moved by this song. Here’s the link on YouTube if you’d like to watch the video: I Would Die For That POSTED BY AMY AT 1:04 PM MONDAY, JULY 02, 2007 July is here It’s funny because now that it’s July, we’ve been having much cooler weather! Actually the last week has been quite a bit cooler. We haven’t had any of those 90-degree days we had in June! I hope it warms up again soon because I just love the heat. We get tomorrow and the Fourth of July off work. It will be nice having two extra days to sleep in! We don’t have any plans yet. The kids were with us over the weekend. Beth left on Sunday afternoon to go to church camp. She’ll be there all week. After she left, Leon and I took Andrew to the movies to see Live Free or Die Hard. We really liked it. I think Justin Long ("Hi, I’m a Mac") is so adorable, but Leon thinks he’s goofy. ;) Speaking of movies, we took the kids to see Evan Almighty a couple weeks ago. That was also a great movie! Just a really positive message and a great family movie. Since my RE (reproductive endocrinologist) no longer needs to see me, he referred me to my regular ob/gyn. I made an appointment with her for Friday, July 13. I can’t wait to have another ultrasound! I could stare at that image of my baby’s heart beating all day long!! It is the most wonderful sight in the world. I have been feeling really good! I’ve never had any morning sickness. I still tend to get tired, but I don’t sleep well. I wake up several times a night (usually because I have to go to the bathroom), and then I 36 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 can’t get back to sleep. My mouth has also been really dry and it seems like I can’t drink enough water. I also get dizzy if I stand up too quickly. And although I'm sure no one could tell I was pregnant just by looking at me yet, I already feel my pants getting a little tighter around the belly. But I’m not complaining! I always said, I would take every pregnancy symptom in the book if only I could have a baby. I’m loving every minute of this pregnancy! Thank you God. I am so excited about this pregnancy! There’s obviously so much we have to do to get ready before February gets here. We’ll need to completely remodel our computer room and turn it into a nursery. We’ll wait until the fall to start this project though so we can find out whether we’re having a girl or a boy first. I figure we won’t be able to find out the sex of the baby until late September/early October. I don’t have a strong feeling one way or another. All I truly want is a healthy baby, so I’ll be thankful whether I have a boy or a girl! The Chinese gender chart looks at the mother’s age (30) and the month of conception (May). According to this, I’m having a girl. We'll have to wait a few more months to find out if this chart is accurate! We've had 4+ years to decide on a name, so we already have girl and boy names picked out. If we have a girl, she'll be Elena Marie (which is what we had planned to name our adopted baby girl). I think Elena is a beautiful name, and Marie was Darlene's middle name. If we have a boy, he'll be Alexander Joseph (Joseph is my dad's name) and we'll call him Alex. :) POSTED BY AMY AT 1:34 PM THURSDAY, JULY 05, 2007 MySpace is a weird place! We didn’t do anything exciting over the Fourth. My brother-in-law and sister-in-law, John and Karen, came over yesterday and are staying with us through Sunday. They are so great to have around because they actually enjoy working on the odd jobs we have around the house! Leon is paying them to do some work for us. There is so much we want to get done around the house before the baby is born. It was hard going back to work today after having two days off...but at least tomorrow is Friday already! My mom is on vacation this week, so she and my dad came to Columbus to do some shopping. They met me for lunch. We went to Smokey Bones at Polaris. It was really good. Andrew and Beth will be staying with us in about another week (I still don’t know the exact date). They’ll be with us for the rest of the summer. Beth has some camps to go to in July, and then both kids will be very busy with sports in August. I have a profile on MySpace. I decided to set it to "private" because in the past few weeks, I’ve gotten about 4 messages from men (most of them married) looking for a "friend"! What is that all about?! If they looked at my profile, they’d see I’m married and pregnant! I think it’s incredibly rude to send messages like that! Now that I set it to private, hopefully the weirdos will stay away!! POSTED BY AMY AT 4:18 PM 37 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 WEDNESDAY, JULY 11, 2007 A new car! I wasn't expecting to get a new car over the weekend, but I ended up getting one! On Saturday, we were driving around in John and Karen's Ford Escape. Leon made a comment that he thought this kind of car would be good for me to have since we have a baby on the way. My other car was a 7-year-old, two-door Ford Escort. I had been worrying how I was going to get a baby in and out of the small backseat. We didn't think that type of car was going to be very safe or family friendly. The car had been paid off for the past year so it was nice not having car payments for a while. We stopped at the car dealership where Leon got his Ford Explorer back in January. I've driven his car a few times and it always scares me. It's just so much bigger than I'm used to. But while the Ford Escape looks like a mini Explorer, it's not nearly as big or scary for me to drive! They had a good sale on their 2007 models. They only had two left and one of them was red...so I had to go with the red one. It has that new car smell of course and drives so smoothly. I am really excited! Of course, the excitement will wear off once I have to start making car payments again every month. ;) But it really will be a much better car to drive a baby around in. Here's a picture of it... POSTED BY AMY AT 2:42 PM FRIDAY, JULY 13, 2007 People's assumptions My RE (reproductive endocrinologist) didn’t need to see me any more, so he referred me back to my regular OB/GYN. I had an appointment with an OB coordinator today (my doctor makes you see the coordinator before your first "official" appointment). The coordinator just went over my medical history 38 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 and talked about what I should be eating, what medications to avoid, where I’ll deliver, etc. Then I had to give blood/urine samples because they do a Quad Screen and an HIV test. My first appointment with my OB/GYN is scheduled for July 25. Something that kind of cracks me up (but can also be annoying if I’m in the wrong mood) is how many times I’ve been asked if we’re having multiples. I only get these questions from people who know we did fertility treatment. Some people must assume that treatment always results in multiples! While it’s definitely true that there are higher rates of multiples in women who do fertility treatment, it’s certainly not always the case (as is evidenced by someone like me who is only having one baby!). I looked up percentages online, and it appears that 25% to 30% of pregnancies from ART (assisted reproductive technology) are twins, 5% are triplets, and less than 1% are quadruplets or more. I know you hear about these stories on the news where people have 4 or more babies as a result of fertility treatment, but the incidence of this is so rare! To be honest, I’m not sure how this can even happen. Any good fertility doctor is going to monitor patients extremely closely so that this doesn’t happen. When I was taking injectables, I had to have ultrasounds every other day in order to monitor my follicle development. If I had 4 or more viable follicles, my doctor would have cancelled the treatment cycle so that I didn’t conceive 4+ babies! I only had at most 2 viable follicles each cycle because I was on such a low dose of injectables. Anyway…I’ll stop my rambling now! I just wanted to share my amusement (and semi-annoyance) at people’s assumptions about fertility treatment. POSTED BY AMY AT 2:49 PM MONDAY, JULY 16, 2007 Our summer with the kids has begun Andrew and Beth are now with us until the end of the summer. On Saturday, we took them to Dave & Buster’s for dinner and then let them play games. On Sunday, Beth was riding her bike near our house and found a park just down the street. We’ve lived in our neighborhood for almost 4 years and we never knew this park was there! It has some picnic tables, a basketball court and a small playground. Beth wanted to have a picnic there for dinner last night, so we did that. Leon planned a last-minute vacation for us to take with the kids. August is out since the kids have sports activities practically every day next month. So we planned a mini-vacation for next Wednesday through Friday. I have a doctor’s appointment next Wednesday at 1:00 p.m., but afterward we’ll head to Cleveland and we’re going to an Indians game that night. We’re staying with Leon’s mom in Medina after the game. On Thursday, we’ll go to Geauga Lake water park and spend the night at a hotel near there. On Friday, we’ll go to Geauga Lake amusement park and then spend the night at Leon’s mom’s house again. I know I 39 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 won’t be able to do much at Geauga Lake, but the kids will enjoy themselves. We’ll head out on Saturday morning and probably go straight to Coshocton because my sister’s wedding reception is that Saturday. So we’ll be doing lots of driving! I’m 10 weeks pregnant this week. Only 30 weeks to go! :) I’m still feeling pretty good, although I don’t sleep very well. My pants are starting to feel a little tight, although you still would never know I’m pregnant just by looking at me. I can’t wait until my belly pops out! I really want to look pregnant. POSTED BY AMY AT 1:52 PM TUESDAY, JULY 17, 2007 What a morning! When I bought my new car, Leon talked them into putting back-up sensors on it at no extra cost just like he has on his Explorer. There are also a couple of scratches on my car that they were going to fix. So I made arrangements to drop my car off at the dealership at 9:00 a.m. this morning. I called them yesterday and asked if I could get a rental car there. They told me that they could call Enterprise for me, but it may take a while and I’d have to wait for them to bring me a car. So I called Enterprise and told them my situation, and they told me to stop by in the morning. They failed to tell me I needed an "official" reservation. I get there this morning and they said they wouldn’t have rental cars until 12:00 or 1:00. I even went to a second Enterprise location near there and they didn’t have any cars available either. I know it’s not that big of a deal, but my emotions are running high since I’m pregnant! I got back in the car (Leon had come with me) and I started to cry. By this time, I was already an hour late for work. We decided I’d just have to drop my car off at the dealership and Leon would have to take me to work. We went to the dealership and discovered that they had a rental car ready for me! Why they failed to mention this to me on the phone yesterday, I have no idea. I wasted an hour running around to Enterprise locations looking for a rental. At any rate, I left my car there and it’s supposed to be finished by 5:00 p.m. tonight. I’m an emotional person anyway, but I have found that I’m even moreso than usual lately. I’m sure it’s all these pregnancy hormones. I’ve been missing Darlene a lot lately. Sometimes I think I’m doing fine, and then other times it seems harder than ever. I keep thinking of all the things that have changed in the almost 4 months since she’s been gone. I wish she was here so I could tell her about them. POSTED BY AMY AT 10:55 AM 40 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 THURSDAY, JULY 19, 2007 Chili cheese dogs I know pregnant women need to be careful when eating foods like hot dogs because of listeriosis. We had hot dogs for dinner one night last week, and I made sure that we boiled them and they were steaming before I ate them. Well, we decided to have chili cheese dogs...and I never dreamed that I’d have to worry about the chili sauce being contaminated! I heard on the news this morning that certain brands of chili sauce, including the Kroger brand which was what we ate last week, have been recalled after making several people sick. The best-by dates on the contaminated cans were April 30 – May 22, 2009. We bought two cans from Kroger and only ate one, so when I get home from work tonight I need to check the can we have left. It’s possible the date is different on the can we ate. None of us got sick after eating our chili dogs last week, so I suppose I shouldn’t be worried. I try to be so careful about what I eat while pregnant. It’s upsetting to me that we have to worry about foods we buy in the store and assume are safe to eat! POSTED BY AMY AT 1:08 PM FRIDAY, JULY 20, 2007 I wasn't food poisoned after all! I’m such a dork! I worried all day yesterday that I possibly ate contaminated chili sauce and harmed the baby. I went home after work and looked in the cupboard to check the sell-by date (we bought two cans of chili sauce and ate only one). It turns out we didn't eat Kroger-brand after all! We always shop there so I just assumed that's what we ate. But last week, Leon bought groceries at Super Wal-Mart instead so he bought Great Value chili sauce. So that's what we ate! I had to laugh after seeing the can. I worried all day yesterday for nothing! :) John and Karen are staying with us again this weekend. They got to our house yesterday afternoon. They plan to do some more work around our house. The last time they stayed with us, they were talking about how much they like Japanese food. So Leon and I decided that we’ll take them to the Japanese steak house for dinner tonight or tomorrow night. The kids are with their mom this weekend. We’re taking them to a Crew soccer game on Sunday evening. I need to go shopping tomorrow. I have to buy a bathing suit for next week when we go to the water park. I also need to buy a dress or a skirt for my sister’s wedding reception. 41 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog I better get some work done now. TGIF! POSTED BY AMY AT 9:01 AM 2007 TUESDAY, JULY 24, 2007 Vacation Week It turns out that Great Value was among the recalled brands that may cause botulism, although it appears that the only Great Value brands affected were sold in Canada. At any rate, we threw out our remaining hot dog chili sauce can. I’ll think twice about eating it in the future, even though I love it! We took the kids to a Crew game on Sunday evening. It was fun. The Crew played Toronto and won 2-0. Our seats were high up, but we were able to see the whole field so it was ok. It was very hot that night though! I have my first "official" appointment with my ob/gyn tomorrow at 1:00 p.m. I can’t wait! I hope she does an ultrasound so I can see our little one again! Leon is coming with me. After my appointment, we’re leaving for our little vacation. We need to stop in Medina first so we can drop Goldie off at Leon’s sister’s house. Then we’ll head into Cleveland for the Indians game. We’re going to wait and see what the weather is like on Thursday before we decide which park to visit that day. If it rains, we’ll go to the water park (since we’ll get wet anyway) and if it’s sunny we’ll go to the amusement park. We’ll head to Coshocton on Saturday. My sister’s wedding reception starts at 5:00 p.m. that day. My mom told me that about 50 people will be there. The reception is at the Elk’s in Coshocton, and we’ll have a buffet dinner. There will also be a DJ there playing music. I’ll get to see some family and friends that I haven’t seen in a while, so that will be nice. We’re spending the night in Coshocton, and then we’ll head back home on Sunday. Beth has an adventure camp to go to next week. And then in August, the kids pretty much have sports practices every day so it will be a busy month. On August 7, I’ll finally be able to get my hair highlighted again! I asked my doctor about it (the RE that I saw) and he said that he didn’t think hair color was unsafe for pregnant women, but he still recommends waiting until your first trimester is over. I’ll be in my 13th week on August 7, so I’m getting my highlights then. I’ve gotten blonde highlights in my hair for the past 8 years, so my dark roots are showing really badly right about now! I better finish up my work here. I’m glad it’s a short work week for me! POSTED BY AMY AT 9:42 AM 42 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 MONDAY, JULY 30, 2007 Back from vacation I’m back at work after three days off last week. We had a nice vacation, even though it was short. The Indians game was fun on Wednesday night. They beat the Boston Red Sox 1-0. On Thursday, we went to the amusement park side of Geauga Lake. They weren’t busy at all, which was nice because the kids didn’t have to wait in long lines. Leon and the kids rode all kinds of rides. Since pregnant women can’t go on too many things, I pretty much sat the whole time but I didn’t mind! I did get to ride the merry-go-round and these little antique cars that you drive on a track. On Friday, we went to the water park but unfortunately it was overcast and rainy that day so it was cold when you weren’t in the water. Leon and the kids went on some water slides. I was able to go in the wave pool and the lazy river with them. I hadn’t been swimming for a long time so I enjoyed being in the water. We didn’t stay at the park too long because it was so chilly though. Here is a picture of us at Geauga Lake on Thursday... We headed back Medina on Friday afternoon. We picked up Leon’s mom and went to see the new Simpsons movie. We really liked it. Our family is a big fan of the Simpsons. I wasn’t sure what to expect from the movie since it’s often difficult to move from the small screen to the big one. But they really pulled it off. On Saturday, we went to Coshocton. My sister’s wedding reception was that evening. I was wearing a tighter-fitting shirt and everyone kept coming up to me and patting my belly and commenting on my "baby bump"! :) Depending on the clothes I wear I look a little more pregnant at times than others. In my opinion though, I’m still at that stage where I just look like I’ve gained some weight in my stomach. I can’t wait until I actually pop! :) 43 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog Here is a picture of Jamie and Julie from the reception... 2007 I’m 12 weeks this week. I’m so glad that I’m almost out of the first trimester! I had my first appointment with my ob/gyn last Wednesday and all was well. I didn’t get to have an ultrasound (my next one won’t be until 20-22 weeks to determine the sex), but we listened to the baby’s heartbeat. The heart rate was 170 bpm, which the doctor said was normal at this stage. Apparently, the rate goes down to 120-160 later in pregnancy. My parents think I’m having a girl because of the heart rate. I personally think that’s just an old wives tale. I still feel like I’m having a boy. We’ll see who’s right at the end of September! My next appointment is on August 20. POSTED BY AMY AT 12:56 PM TUESDAY, JULY 31, 2007 Our Guardian Angel I find this to be very ironic and more than just a little coincidental. Including me, three of Darlene’s close friends are now expecting! Sherri is due in December, Leslie is due in February and I’m due in February. If you read this post, Sherri and Leslie, I wish you all the best! Sherri had some early losses and Darlene told me at one time that Leslie had some trouble conceiving. So it’s truly amazing that all three of us are finally going to have our babies. It really makes me think that Darlene is watching over us – our guardian angel. I’ve always heard people say that when there’s a death, there’s new life. That certainly seems to be the case among Darlene’s friends. I just wanted to share this story today. POSTED BY AMY AT 10:58 AM 44 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 01, 2007 Unbelievable I sent a message to Leslie congratulating her on her pregnancy. She told me that another one of Darlene’s good friends, Megan, is pregnant and due at the end of January. I am blown away. Four of Darlene’s close friends, all pregnant, and due within weeks of each other. It truly is amazing. Thank you for watching over us all, Darlene. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:06 AM THURSDAY, AUGUST 02, 2007 Some pregnancy ramblings... I need to have Leon take a belly shot so I can post it on here. To me, my belly doesn’t look big yet but it might to someone who hasn’t seen me in a while. I’m still wearing my regular clothes, but I’ve noticed that especially after I eat my belly pops out and I have to unbutton my pants! I think I’m still at that stage where I don’t really look pregnant, I just look like I’ve gained weight in my stomach. Ever since finding out I was pregnant, time has moved so s-l-o-w-l-y. It seems like years since I had a positive pregnancy test back in June! And it’s only been two months. It’s the strangest thing because I always used to think time went by so quickly! I’m still feeling well. I’ve been sleeping a little better and I don’t have to get up and use the bathroom quite as much as I did in the beginning. Everyone tells me I should be grateful for never having morning sickness, but I have to admit this scared me at first. I thought something must be wrong with me if I didn’t get sick and I heard all these horror stories about women who don’t have morning sickness are more likely to miscarry. I always said I would take any and every pregnancy symptom in the book if it meant I could have a baby, and that’s still true. I wouldn’t have minded the sickness as long as I got the chance to be a mom. Some women also have food/smell aversions, and I’ve never noticed this either. But maybe that’s tied to the morning sickness. Sometimes I think I’m craving certain foods, but I have yet to be turned off by any foods or smells. I was surprised at how easy it was to give up caffeine! I used to love my coffee in the morning and then I’d drink Diet Coke all day long. Before I was pregnant and I deprived myself of caffeine, I’d get the worst headaches. But that hasn’t happened since I’ve been pregnant. I’ve cut out as much caffeine as I can. I no longer drink coffee or pop (other than an occasional Sprite), although I do have chocolate once in a while. For the most part, I only drink water and milk. I never stop being grateful for this pregnancy. I wanted this for so long and am just so thankful to finally 45 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 get the chance to be a mom. I am enjoying every minute of this pregnancy! I can’t wait until the end of September/beginning of October when we can find out if this baby is a boy or a girl. I’m still calling him a he when I talk about him, but only time will tell! POSTED BY AMY AT 3:51 PM TUESDAY, AUGUST 07, 2007 Humid summer days My parents came over on Saturday and Leon and I took them to a concert at the Ohio State Fair. My dad is a big fan of old country music, so we went to a Merle Haggard/George Jones concert. We had a nice time. I was surprised that the concert seemed to be sold out! I guess I didn’t realize that Merle and George still had that much of a draw. But there were a lot of people there my dad’s age who are probably also fans of old country. We didn’t actually tour the fair though. My dad has trouble with his legs and can’t walk very far. Leon and I thought about taking the kids to the fair, but they don’t have any free time. They have sports practice every evening this week and they’re with their mom this weekend. We’ll just have to wait until the fall and we can go to the Coshocton County Fair. It’s been so hot this past week anyway! It’s so humid that it’s uncomfortable to be outside for long periods of time. I wish we had this kind of weather when we went to the water park! This would have been ideal. I’m finally getting my hair highlighted tonight. I can’t wait! My roots look horrible. I haven’t had my hair done since before I was pregnant, which must have been late April/early May so I am in desperate need of a touch-up! After the baby is born, I’d like to have something done to my hair called Japanese hair straightening. There’s a salon in Columbus that specializes in this. They put some kind of solution on your hair and use a flat iron to straighten it. But unlike traditional straightening methods, it’s supposed to leave your hair smooth and shiny and can last anywhere from 6 months to a year. Of course it’s expensive. I’ve read it can cost approximately $500 depending on the length of your hair. My hair is not that long, so I don’t think it would cost quite that much. Some people might think I’m crazy for wanting this done, but anyone with curly hair who is sick and tired of battling their curls can understand this. My naturally curly hair is completely unruly and I despise it. I’ve had curls all my life and have never learned to love them. I’ve straightened my hair (using a flat iron every day) for the past 8 years. This is extremely time-consuming (if I wash my hair and then have to dry and straighten it, it can take me an hour). Once the baby is born, I’m not going to have that kind of time to spend on my hair. That being said, there is NO WAY I would leave it curly. It’s horrible! So I think this Japanese hair straightening would be ideal and make my life so much easier! 46 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 I better get back to work. I have a council meeting this afternoon and I have to write the minutes from our last meeting. I hate writing minutes, so I always procrastinate on this until the last possible second! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:07 AM TUESDAY, AUGUST 14, 2007 Already sleep-deprived and the baby isn't even here yet! To all my avid readers (haha), sorry I’ve been such a bad blogger lately. There really hasn’t been anything terribly exciting going on. Like I mentioned before, time moves soooooo slowly for me now that I’m pregnant! It seems like it should be February by now!!!! ;) I am so impressed by my friend Sarah. She has three young children, a husband, pets and a house to take care of, and she still manages to blog every day! Good for you Sarah!! I wish I had your motivation! :) I feel like we haven’t been able to do much with the kids since they’ve been with us this summer. I hardly get to see them. I get home from work and they’re already at their sports practices. They don’t get home until about 8:00 p.m., we feed them a quick dinner, and then Beth usually goes to bed (she is so disciplined and goes to bed early even in the summer!) and Andrew goes into his room to play Xbox. They’re with us one more week after this, and then they go back to their mom’s because school starts on August 28. I was looking forward to last weekend. We didn’t have the kids and for the first time in a month, we didn’t have company and we didn’t have to travel anywhere. I was hoping to just sleep in and take naps and get caught up on my sleep. While I didn’t end up going anywhere over the weekend, I still wasn’t able to get rested. For whatever reason, I’m having so much trouble sleeping now that I’m pregnant. I’m sure it’s a combination of a bunch of different things, but I toss and turn all night. I probably wake up once an hour. If I can’t get comfortable and my belly is still small, then I’m sure I’ll get no sleep once my belly is actually big! Maybe this is nature’s way of preparing me for the sleep-deprived nights I’ll have once the baby is born. I try to relax, but my brain never shuts off. I think of all the things we have to do to get our home ready before the baby is born. I’ve also been worrying about child care once the baby is here. I don’t feel confident that we can pay our bills on one salary, so I plan to keep working. Last week, we went to the KinderCare where Andrew and Beth went when they were babies. I had sticker shock after learning that they charge $960 a month to care for an infant! I knew it would be expensive, but I didn’t realize it would be THAT much. I’ve contacted a few other local day care centers and found all of them charge very similar rates – close to $1,000 a month for an infant. I wish I could somehow work from home. I’m researching all my options to see what I can do. At any rate, these kinds of things keep me up at night! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:56 AM 47 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 MONDAY, AUGUST 20, 2007 Music to my ears I had an appointment with my OB/GYN this morning. It was a quick appointment. She just measured my belly and listened to the baby’s heartbeat. She found the heartbeat right away. It’s such a beautiful sound – such music to my ears! The heart rate was 160 beats per minute, which according to my mom means the baby must be a girl. ;) We’ll find out soon enough! My next appointment is on September 17, which happens to be my mom’s birthday. I thought this would be the appointment where we could find out the sex of the baby (I’ll be 19 weeks at that time). But my doctor told me that she’ll schedule me for an ultrasound for that purpose sometime between weeks 20-22. So most likely, we won’t get to find out if this little one is a boy or a girl until the beginning of October. The kids were with their mom over the weekend, but Beth had a soccer tournament so she had four games that we went to. Her team ended up winning and all of the girls received trophies. They were very proud. I spent hours yesterday (from about 4:00 - 10:30 p.m.) cleaning the house – and I only got the downstairs cleaned! I have to clean the upstairs tonight. I tend to procrastinate on house cleaning to the point where things get so dirty that it takes me hours to clean. If I did a little bit of tidying every day, the job wouldn’t be so overwhelming. But I did some extra things yesterday like clean baseboards and clean out cupboards, so I think that’s why it took me such a long time. Since Andrew and Beth are staying with us all the time right now, the house gets even messier than usual. I better get used to it though since I’ll have a child in the house full-time very soon! Goldie also sheds terribly. I adore golden retrievers, but one of the downfalls of the breed is definitely their shedding. I actually made a vet appointment for Goldie tomorrow morning. Her skin is so dry and she scratches it constantly! She has her belly bloody and scabbed from itching so much. She literally pulls out the fur on her stomach and I’ve been finding huge clumps of fur all around the house. Her stomach looks bald from all of her itching. I know she doesn’t have fleas because we give her flea medicine. When I called the vet, the woman I talked to on the phone wasn’t surprised at all. She said that pet allergies are very common this time of year and they’ve seen lots of pets with problems like Goldie’s. Goldie also needs to get caught up on some of her vaccinations so we’ll have the vet do that tomorrow too. I feel sad for Goldie though. She is a 90-pound baby! She gets so scared at the vet’s. This is the last week that the kids are staying with us. They go back to their mom’s house next week and they start back to school next Tuesday. POSTED BY AMY AT 10:01 AM 48 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 TUESDAY, AUGUST 21, 2007 Allergies and Ghosts I took Goldie to the vet this morning. The vet said that Goldie wasn’t having typical seasonal allergies, but an allergic reaction to something. He was quite shocked at how bad Goldie’s belly and legs are. I felt like a bad fur mama for not getting Goldie into the vet sooner. I didn’t realize how serious it was until I noticed her bloody belly a couple days ago. The only thing I’ve done differently lately is that I’ve been mopping the kitchen floor with Pine Sol. Goldie lays on the kitchen floor all the time, so maybe that has irritated her belly. At any rate, I’ll switch cleaners and see if that helps her. I feel so sorry for her. The vet said that she must be miserable and in a lot of pain. She hasn’t eaten very much the past couple days and she threw up twice within the past 24 hours. The vet said that this allergic reaction was also affecting her ears and her eyes. He put a cone on Goldie’s head because he said she can’t itch herself anymore. She has to wear it for 3-4 days and she hates it. He also gave her two antibiotics, pain pills, eye drops and ear drops. So she has to take a lot of meds for the next week! The vet wants to see her in a week. If she’s doing better at that time, she can get caught up on her other vaccinations. He didn’t want to give those to her today because she has to take so many other meds right now. He did give her a steroid shot which should hopefully bring some immediate relief to her itching. Here’s a picture of poor Goldie with her cone... Moving onto a different subject – I talked to my sister last night and she thinks her apartment is haunted! Julie and Jamie have been living in this apartment since they got married in April. It’s not a very old apartment, but it’s down the street from a cemetery. My sister isn’t afraid though. She senses that the spirits in her apartment are just trying to communicate with her and not cause her harm. I know a lot of people will say there’s no way this is possible. Although I’ve never experienced anything like this myself, I am completely open to the possibility that ghosts may exist. Julie thinks that some people’s minds may be more open to seeing spirits or communicating with them, and I think that could be true. Julie senses that there are spirits around her when she wakes up (so a lot of people will say that she’s just dreaming). But she’s woken up more than once and seen the spirit of a man standing in the corner of her room. She woke up yesterday and sensed there were three spirits around her, and she saw one of them 49 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 run out of the room. She said that the spirits don’t look like humans – they look more like shadows, but she can sense whether they’re male or female. She sees shadows crossing in front of their bedroom door at night, and this freaked her out at first so she started leaving the hall light on. But she said she is no longer scared. Jamie hasn’t witnessed any spirits, but he was there with Julie a couple weeks ago when one of their lights went on and off five times! He said there must be a short in the light and he unplugged it. Julie also feels that she is receiving messages from the spirits in her dreams. She had a very vivid dream and message the other night. I don’t want to go into details here because I’m not sure who reads this blog – but if you want to know about this particular dream, just send me an e-mail and I’ll tell you. I was personally comforted by this because it makes me think that people don’t just die – they live on, maybe in another plane of existence. Anyway, I’m sure some people will laugh at all of this and say Julie and I are both crazy for even considering this may be a possibility. But I’d like to think this could be true! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:25 AM WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 22, 2007 Missing her I don’t talk a lot about her to anyone anymore (or even on here), but not a day goes by that I don’t think about Darlene. Tomorrow will be 5 months since she passed. I miss her so much. Sometimes it feels like it’s even harder as time goes by because I get further and further away from the last time I talked to her and saw her. I miss girl time so much. Darlene and I would get together for dinner and/or a movie almost every week. I don’t have anyone to go to chick flicks with anymore. Last week, Leon went to Red Lobster with me because I was craving it. He hates seafood (he ordered steak there) so it’s rare that he’ll go there with me. I used to go with Darlene and we’d order the stuffed mushrooms (Leon won’t eat them because they have seafood in them). Things like that make me miss her a lot. I even started to cry when we were at Red Lobster last week because I mentioned to Leon how Darlene used to go with me there. I hear a song or see a TV show or a movie and something triggers a memory of her. I know it’s good to remember her. Not that I could ever forget her anyway. But I just wish she was here now. I wish she could see my baby when he/she is born in February. I know she’d have made such a great Aunt Darlene. I’m just sad today thinking about her and missing her a lot. POSTED BY AMY AT 1:38 PM 50 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 MONDAY, AUGUST 27, 2007 My Mary Kay Business is Closing This Friday, August 31, my Mary Kay business will be officially closed. Part of me is kind of sad that it didn’t work out, but to be honest I didn’t put very much effort into making it work. I am not meant for sales. I give up too easily when someone says "No." I hate to push people into something they don’t want because I know how much I hate when someone tries to pressure me into buying something. I really do love Mary Kay products, so I’m going to miss my 50% discount! I still plan to buy some of the products in the future because I really like their TimeWise collection. I still have some samples to give away, although I gave the majority of my inventory to my mom, sister and mother-in-law. But the bottom line was that I was investing more into the business than I was getting out of it. I had to place a $400 order (actually $200 with my discount) every 3 months in order to maintain my 50% discount and keep my "active" status. I don’t personally use $400 worth of product every 3 months and no one else was really buying from me. It would have been nice if it worked out though because I could have been a stay-at-home mom if I was successful with it. Some of those Mary Kay consultants do VERY well for themselves, but unfortunately I was not one of them. Changing subjects, the kids went back to their mom’s house last night. Our summer with them is over. I cried after they left. It always makes me sad to see them go because I get so used to having them around all the time. Of course we’ll still get to see them every other weekend and at their games, but it’s not the same as having them with us every day. They start back to school tomorrow. Andrew will be in 8th grade and Beth will be in 6th grade. This is their last year at their current schools. Andrew will start high school next year and Beth will be in middle school. It’s hard to believe how fast they’re growing up! Andrew will graduate in 2012 and Beth in 2014. Our baby will start school in 2013. I told Leon he’ll have his two oldest children out of school and will be starting all over again with his youngest! Beth wanted to build her own cornhole game, so we went to Lowe’s and got supplies for that over the weekend. Beth found instructions on how to build your own game on the Internet. She and Leon worked on this on Saturday and Sunday. They built two boards. They still need to paint them and we need to either make or buy the beanbags. They did such a good job though! Beth was so proud of their creation. Goldie seems to be doing better. We’re not making her wear the cone anymore because she doesn’t seem to be scratching nearly as much as she was a week ago. Her belly is no longer bleeding and looks much better. Now that she’s healing, it’s apparent how much fur she ripped out though! She is nearly bald on her left side, near her tail. It looks so strange! She still probably has another two weeks worth of antibiotics to take. She has wised up to the peanut butter trick and tends to spit her pills back out after eating the peanut butter! So we alternate foods and hide her pills in cheese sometimes too. She has to go back to the vet’s tomorrow morning for a follow-up appointment and to get caught up on her vaccinations. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:22 AM 51 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 29, 2007 My burning heart :) I’ve been having really bad heartburn/indigestion lately! It usually starts right after I eat and the Tums are not helping. I avoided morning sickness, but it looks like I’m not going to be able to avoid this! ;) I’ve tried eating smaller portions. My stomach feels uncomfortably full if I eat too much in one sitting. But even by eating less, I still can’t seem to escape this heartburn. People’s suggestions to help with the heartburn include drinking water, milk or Boost, or eating ice cream or an apple. I’m at work right now and only have access to water and Tums, and I can tell you those aren’t doing the trick at the moment. Oh well. Small price to pay for this little one! I was hoping to get some input from any moms who read my blog though. If you dealt with heartburn in pregnancy, what helped you? Thank you! :) POSTED BY AMY AT 3:16 PM FRIDAY, AUGUST 31, 2007 I think I may be feeling the baby move! For the past week, I’ve been feeling strange sensations in my stomach. I’m still not 100% certain that I'm feeling the baby, but that’s always my first thought! Everyone told me I would feel butterflies or bubbles. It’s actually very hard for me to describe what I’m feeling. To me it feels like my stomach is getting ready to growl but it doesn’t, and then there’s a bubbly sensation. Of course I keep telling myself it’s probably just gas bubbles, but it feels different from anything I’ve felt before. This morning I had a little more proof that maybe it IS the baby I'm feeling! I very rarely have caffeine now that I'm pregnant. But I stopped at UDF this morning before work and got a small French vanilla cappuccino. After drinking it, those bubble sensations in my tummy were extremely noticeable! I think it was the baby responding to the caffeine that mommy gave him/her! At least I’d like to believe that anyway. I had the biggest smile on my face as I sat at my desk this morning and felt those bubbles. Even if I’m still only imagining things, it was so cool to think my baby may be moving all around inside me and kicking his/her mama! I am so in love with this little one. We get a three-day weekend since Labor Day is on Monday. Leon’s mom is coming down tomorrow and spending the weekend with us. She rarely gets to visit us at home (we usually always go there), so we’re 52 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 happy to have her. Leon wants to take us to the Japanese restaurant for dinner tomorrow night. They always have the best food, so that will be fun! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:13 AM THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 06, 2007 I wish I looked pregnant! I’ve still been feeling some flutters. I’m pretty sure I’m feeling the baby, but I can’t wait until these feelings become more prominent so I know for sure. My heartburn hasn’t been as bad lately either. I still don’t sleep well. My stomach muscles have been feeling kind of sore and stretched out lately. I’m sure it’s because my belly is growing. I keep meaning for Leon to take some belly shots of me, but we never get around to it! I’ll try to do that soon. I don’t think I look very big for 17 weeks! People who don’t know I’m pregnant would have no idea. I think it just looks like I’ve gained a little weight in my stomach. I don’t have a recognizable baby bump yet. I lost weight (about 20 pounds – yay for me!) before I got pregnant so my regular clothes still fit me. I’d love to buy maternity clothes, but I have no use for them yet. I haven’t weighed myself lately, so I don’t even know how much weight I’ve gained. I know I only gained 2-3 pounds in my first trimester. I suppose I should be happy – I’ll have less weight to lose after the baby is born. But for someone who has wanted to be pregnant for soooo long, I am very impatient to start looking pregnant! I go back to my OB on September 17, when I’m 19 weeks. She said she’ll schedule an ultrasound sometime between weeks 20-22. I wish time would speed up! It is going way too slowly. I want to find out if this baby is a boy or a girl! I’m still thinking boy, but almost everyone else says girl. We’ll see if they prove me wrong. ;) POSTED BY AMY AT 10:46 AM FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 07, 2007 TGIF again TGIF! It’s always nice to have short work weeks. 53 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 I weighed myself this morning and I’ve gained 7 pounds so far, which is pretty good and right on track. My doctor said I should only gain about 25-30 pounds total. So far, I haven’t felt hungrier than usual. I’m probably getting the extra 300 calories a day I need since I don’t eat perfectly anyway. I’ve been trying to eat more healthy things, but it’s been a challenge for me because I’m not a fan of fruits or vegetables. I take my prenatal vitamins every day though (actually I’ve been taking those for years!). Leon has been having back problems all summer. I think his back started hurting back in June or early July. He thought he pulled a muscle, but the pain didn’t go away. He went to the doctor and was told he had a pinched nerve. But here it is over a month later and he is still in terrible pain. He went back to the doctor this week and had to have x-rays taken yesterday. He’ll get the results in 2-3 days. I hope it’s nothing serious, but there’s a possibility he may need surgery. I just want his pain to go away. It makes me so sad to see him like this! He can hardly move without wincing in pain. He’s been taking pain pills, but all those do are cover up the pain and make him extremely tired. They don’t solve the problem. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:55 AM SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 08, 2007 Belly Shots As promised, here are a couple shots of my almost 18-week belly. (You should be able to click on these to make them larger.) Leon took these for me today. I told you I wasn't very big yet! :) 54 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 POSTED BY AMY AT 5:59 PM TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 11, 2007 Remembering 9-11 It’s hard to believe that it’s been 6 years already since 9-11. It seems like yesterday when I think about it. I remember that day so clearly, as I’m sure everyone who lived through it does. I had to get up earlier than usual this morning and be at work by 7:30 because we had an 8:00 a.m. class to get ready for. I had to be here to make coffee, set up the breakfast, etc. Now I’m very tired. I would like to get some coffee and get a little bit of caffeine in me, but the classroom with 80+ people is right next to our kitchen and I don’t want to disturb them by making myself coffee. So I’ll have to wait... It would also be nice to get some warm liquid for my throat. I woke up this morning with a sore throat. I also have a headache and I’m kind of stuffed up. I feel like I could be getting a cold. I’ve done so well this past year, with hardly any colds or allergies, and I credit that with the flu shot I got last fall. I plan to get another flu shot as soon as I can. I know they actually recommend that pregnant women get a shot if they’ll be in flu season during their second and third trimesters. I don’t want to take any medications for a cold so I’ll probably try to grin and bear it. The only "meds" I’ve allowed myself to take while pregnant are Tums. I have a list of medications that my doctor told me are safe during pregnancy for all kinds of different ailments. But I really want to avoid taking anything if at all possible. Leon found out yesterday that his back x-rays were normal. I’m relieved, but finding this out still doesn’t change the fact that Leon’s in pain. His doctor recommended going to a chiropractor, so he’s going to one tomorrow. The doctor thinks he just needs time to heal and that he has a pinched nerve, although we don’t know how he hurt his back to start with. I toured a day care center yesterday and was very impressed. It’s about $100 a month cheaper than KinderCare and seems like a very nice facility. I’m going to tour another day care center on my lunch break today. This place is even a little less expensive than the place I went to yesterday. Depending on which place I like better, I’m going to get our registration and deposit in by the end of the week. This will 55 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 assure that we have a spot in their infant program next spring. When I called around to different day care centers, I was surprised that some of them have up to a year and a half waiting list! Luckily, these two centers I’m looking at have openings for next spring if I reserve a spot now. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:31 AM WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 12, 2007 Leon’s back problems Leon’s doctor said everything was fine with his back. Well today, Leon went to the chiropractor recommended by his doctor. This guy said that Leon has no reflex response below his right knee. He seems to think this is something very serious and that there is nerve damage. He ordered an immediate MRI because he is concerned there is either a "bulging disc" or "something else occupying the space" in his back. What?! I am really confused. Leon had the MRI, but won’t get the results for 24-48 hours. Now he’s really worried and I am too. Apparently, this chiropractor hinted at the "C" word. I’m mad, to be honest. Why would this guy get Leon all upset and make us worry after his doctor said everything was fine? I told Leon he needed to call his doctor immediately and let him know what this chiropractor said. Leon left a message about all of this with his doctor, but hasn’t heard back from him yet. I’m just having trouble understanding how two medical professionals can be on completely different pages about Leon’s back! His doctor saw no need for concern and said his x-rays showed no abnormalities. And then the chiropractor claims that immediate action needs to be taken for something as serious as this. All I need is one more thing to worry about! It’s always something. On a different subject, I decided that I liked the day care center I visited on Monday the best. This place is $40 a month higher than the other place I visited, but overall it just seems a little more modern and very similar to KinderCare. Both of the places I visited this week were the cheapest day care centers I was able to find for infant care. I’m going to stop by in the morning to drop off my application and deposit so I can reserve our spot for next spring. I’m relieved that we have a place lined up. Ideally, I would love it if I could be a stay-at-home mom. And maybe something will change (we’ll win the lottery!) before next spring and I’ll be able to do that. At this point in time though, it just doesn’t seem like that possibility is going to work out for us. I know many people who tell me they’ve been able to live on one income, but it’s extremely difficult (in fact, it’s impossible) for us because of certain circumstances which I won’t get into on here (but people who know me know what I’m talking about – and if you don’t and are really curious, just send me an e-mail! I’m always happy to share my "rants"). ;) POSTED BY AMY AT 4:43 PM 56 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 14, 2007 Almost the weekend Leon got the results from his MRI this morning. He has benign "blood tumors" called spinal hemangiomas. He also has a bulging disc. Both of these things are causing his pain. The chiropractor will work on Leon’s back three times and if it’s not better, he’ll be sent back to his medical doctor and will probably have to have surgery. The good news is that it seems that spinal hemangiomas are always benign (so there shouldn't be any cause to worry that they'll suddenly turn malignant). We're discouraged that surgery may end up being the best option though. My cold is pretty much full-blown now, which sucks. I was hoping it would get better before it got worse. I just hope it doesn’t last too long. I’m heading to Coshocton after work tonight to spend the weekend. Leon is staying home with Goldie so he can rest his back. He has trouble driving very far right now because of his pain. The reason I wanted to get home is because my sister’s birthday was on Wednesday and my mom’s birthday is on Monday. I think we’re having a little celebration for both of them tomorrow. My parents are taking me to the local Eagle’s lodge for dinner tonight. I love their food! I try to eat there every time I go home. I have a doctor’s appointment on Monday morning. I’ll be 19 weeks. I wish she would do my ultrasound at this appointment, but she won’t. I don’t even think she does them...I imagine an ultrasound tech does them for her. Hopefully, she’ll schedule my ultrasound for the following week although it could be up to 3 more weeks before I get to have one (she said anytime between 20-22 weeks). I am getting really impatient, wondering if there’s a little boy or a little girl in there!! POSTED BY AMY AT 12:46 PM MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 17, 2007 One more week until we find out...boy or girl! I had an appointment with my doctor this morning. The baby’s heart rate was the same as last time, right around 160. I also had to get my blood drawn so they can do a quad screen. I was a little bummed because I was under the mistaken assumption that I already had this test done. When I saw the OB coordinator when I was about 9 weeks, I filled out paperwork for the quad screen that day and had to have my blood drawn then. But my doctor told me that was just standard prenatal bloodwork. They can’t do the quad screen test until between weeks 16-19. I could have refused the test, but my doctor said it’s standard for her patients. I just don’t like that this test apparently has a lot of false positives. And I wouldn’t do anything even if the tests showed something was wrong with my baby. I don’t believe in abortion and wouldn’t dream of killing my child no matter 57 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 what. My doctor said that she’ll get the results in 10 days, but will only call if something shows up abnormal...so I hope I don’t hear from her! The good news is, I scheduled my "big" ultrasound for next Wednesday, September 26! So if the baby is cooperative, we should get to find out next week whether this baby is a boy or a girl. I’m so excited! I can’t wait to start buying pink or blue as soon as I know. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:02 AM THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 20, 2007 It's always something... I purposely drank a cup of coffee this morning so I could feel the baby move! I feel those flutters quite a bit when I drink caffeine. The feelings are still very soft though. I’m really looking forward to the day when the baby is big enough to give me a good kick and really let me know that he/she is in there! I’m sure these movements will become much more prominent in the next few weeks because the baby is supposed to be growing pretty rapidly right now. I know the feelings are different for every woman, but from the day I first started noticing the baby moving it has always felt kind of like my stomach is getting ready to growl. It’s really hard to describe, but it’s kind of like a gurgling/bubbly feeling – although my stomach never growls when I have this feeling, so that’s how I know it’s something different. My mom told me it would feel like butterflies, but I wouldn’t describe it as butterflies personally. I think my stomach is starting to pop out a little more. I think I definitely look bigger than I did just a couple weeks ago. At my doctor’s appointment on Monday, they weighed me and I’ve gained 8 pounds. People still probably think I’m just chubby as opposed to pregnant though. My pants are tighter, especially after I eat because I have to unbutton them then. But I still don’t think I’m big enough to invest in any maternity clothes just yet. I need to get Leon to take some more belly shots of me soon. I’ve also noticed lately that my stomach is very hard when I touch it. I’d heard that your stomach becomes harder in pregnancy, but up until now it had still been squishy. I still don’t sleep well and I get heartburn pretty frequently. My latest thing has been my sense of urgency when I have to pee! I’m afraid I’m going to pee my pants at some point because I really can’t hold it anymore. Leon thinks I need to start wearing diapers so I don’t have any accidents. ;) Speaking of Leon, he’s not doing any better. He took the whole week off work because he’s in so much pain. He’s been to the chiropractor twice this week and has one more appointment tomorrow. The chiropractor told him if the appointments don’t help him this week, he’ll have to go back to his medical doctor. Leon dreads having surgery, but it looks like that might be his only option. I’m bummed about my new car. I’ve already had two things happen to it! When I was heading to Coshocton Friday night, a rock flew up and hit my windshield. I now have a noticeable crack. It’s pretty 58 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 small, but will still need to be fixed. I haven’t called my insurance company, but Leon thinks that windshield damage is not covered because it’s such a common thing – and even if it is covered, we have a $500 deductible so it might just be cheaper to get my windshield fixed without dealing with my insurance company! And at the beginning of this week, a warning light came on in my car and said I have low tire pressure. Leon checked all my tires and said he sees nothing wrong with them, so we think it may be a faulty sensor. My car is leased so a faulty sensor would be covered, but if there is actually something wrong with my tires that wouldn’t be covered. On top of all of this, our car insurance went up $71 a month because Leon and I both have brand new cars! Ouch!! I think I might have to start shopping around with different insurance companies and see if I can get better rates elsewhere. Leon broke a mirror a couple weeks ago, and although I’ve never believed in superstitions I told him I think he may have caused us to have 7 years of bad luck! Like my Uncle Jim always used to say, if it wasn’t for bad luck I wouldn’t have any luck at all. I feel like that sometimes. It certainly does seem like it’s always something! Everyone tells me "That’s life," but it still sucks when you’re in the middle of all of it. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:30 AM MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 24, 2007 Counting down to Wednesday! Several people told me that they thought my insurance WOULD pay for windshield damage (thanks for the advice Sarah and Lauren!). So I called my insurance company today and found out that they will pay for the whole thing IF it can be fixed without replacing my entire windshield. If my windshield would need to be replaced, I have to pay a $250 deductible. A glass company is going to come to my work tomorrow and fix my windshield right in the parking lot. On Friday, that low tire pressure warning light in my car went out. It hasn’t come back on yet. I don’t know what that was all about, but I’m just glad it seems to have gone away for now! Leon’s chiropractor thinks he is making some progress, so he wants to see Leon three more times this week. Leon thought he felt a little better over the weekend. I just hope he continues to improve, so he doesn’t have to resort to surgery. We had the kids over the weekend. Andrew invited some friends over to watch the Buckeyes game on Saturday. Beth and I aren’t football fans, so we went to Michael’s during the game and bought some crafts to work on. A few weeks ago, Beth and Leon made a cornhole game, but they haven’t painted it yet. So we bought paint for the cornhole game (although she never got around to painting this weekend). Beth also bought a wooden tray, some stained glass panels and some ribbon. She spent most of Saturday gluing the panels and ribbon on the tray. It turned out very cute! She wants to use it as a tray you eat on, kind of like a breakfast-in-bed tray. 59 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 I am getting so anxious for our Wednesday ultrasound! The other night I told Leon that I feel like a kid at Christmas...so excited to unwrap my present on Wednesday and find out what it is! I just hope our little one cooperates. I plan to drink some orange juice and eat a candy bar (what a combo, right?!) before I go. I heard you should eat or drink something beforehand to get the baby moving. POSTED BY AMY AT 2:17 PM TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 25, 2007 One more day until our ultrasound! The glass company referred to me by my insurance company came out to my work this morning and repaired my windshield. It only took about 10 minutes. The guy from the glass company didn’t feel that my whole windshield needed to be replaced so he just filled the crack. The crack is guaranteed not to spread further for the life of the vehicle. I didn’t have to pay for the repair, so that was nice! But unfortunately, you can still see the crack – the glass guy told me this is what happens when you fill a crack. I told him it was a leased vehicle, and he said he has filled cracks on leases before and there was never a problem. However, I think Ford will probably charge me for it when I trade the car in since my windshield no longer looks perfect. Oh well...I have three more years before I need to worry about trading my car in anyway. I weighed myself this morning and I have now gained 11 pounds. My doctor told me she would be fine if I gained one pound a week in my second and third trimesters. Since I have 20 more weeks to go, it looks like I’ll have no problems gaining the 25-30 pounds she said I should gain. I thought I wasn’t gaining enough weight so I think I’ve been eating a little too well lately! Leon has sleep apnea so he takes Ambien to help him sleep. He just recently started taking this and I’ve noticed it makes him act really, really strange! It’s fine if he takes it and goes to sleep immediately. But if he tries to stay awake, he says and does bizarre things. He also seems to have no coordination after taking it. He’ll drop things and he has trouble walking. Last night, he was watching TV in bed and he started snoring, so I told him to turn off the TV. He dropped the remote on the floor and when he tried to pick it up, he fell out of bed! He hit his head and chest on the nightstand. This morning, he didn’t have any memory of this happening! I’m sure falling out of bed was really helpful for his back. Leon and I are going to Coshocton this weekend because the Coshocton County Fair will be going on. I think I’ve been there every year since I was about a year old. It’s always the same old, same old – nothing too exciting. But I always enjoy eating that greasy fair food! We’ll head to Coshocton on Saturday and spend the night. We’re planning on going to the fair with my parents on Saturday afternoon. My sister won’t go because she claims she doesn’t like fairs! Less than 24 hours until our ultrasound! I’ll certainly post tomorrow and let you know whether we’re having a girl or a boy! POSTED BY AMY AT 1:18 PM 60 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 26, 2007 So now we know... Leon and I got to our OB’s office this morning for our 11:20 a.m. ultrasound, and when I checked in the receptionist told me there was a "very sick person" in the ultrasound room and I couldn’t go in there. It must have been an emergency of some type, but of course I was upset. They could have at least called me ahead of time so I didn’t drive a half hour to the OB’s office! They were able to reschedule my appointment for 1:40 p.m. this afternoon. When I got into the parking lot, I started to cry. I was just so disappointed. Granted I only had to wait about 2 hours more, but my pregnancy hormones are in full swing! I ended up taking the rest of the day off work as a personal day because it seemed silly to drive all the way back to work only to leave again for my afternoon appointment. At any rate, Leon and I went back at 1:40 and thank God we were able to get into the ultrasound room this time. And the part you’ve been waiting for…we found out we’re having a GIRL!! I am so thrilled. It was so surreal to have the ultrasound and see our baby daughter. She was sleeping at first (I ate my candy bar and drank my orange juice before my morning appointment, but the effects must have worn off by the afternoon) and one of her feet was between her legs so we couldn’t see anything. But the ultrasound tech wiggled my stomach and she moved her foot, and we could clearly see that she’s a girl! We saw her arms and legs and face and profile. At one point, her hand was up to her mouth and it looked like she was sucking her thumb. It was just so cool. The tech said that she was measuring right on target and all looked well. Her head was on my bladder so the tech said it’s no wonder I have to pee all the time! Her feet are right by my belly button, which is where I always feel flutters. I assumed that was where she was kicking me. The tech gave us about 10 pictures. I’ll scan them in at work tomorrow and post them on my blog (I don’t have a scanner at home). So now we know…we’re having an Elena Marie. All this time, I felt sure I was having a boy but it looks like the old wives’ tales about heart rates was true when it came to our situation. It somehow feels even more real now that we got to see her and we know she’s a girl. We can finally start working on her room! And I’ll be able to decorate it in butterflies just like I had planned when I thought we were adopting a little girl. POSTED BY AMY AT 3:46 PM 61 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2007 Elena's Pictures Below are 6 of the 10 ultrasound pictures. The tech labeled most of the pictures. I’ll admit, I always thought it was hard to tell what part you’re looking at when you view an ultrasound picture. But I guess these pictures are easy for me to distinguish because we saw the live-action shots on the screen yesterday! When we came out of the OB’s office after the ultrasound, unfortunately it was raining. So most of my pictures have small smudges on them. I just didn’t want you to think I had some strange markings in my womb! These are actually dried water marks. I have an album that I’m going to put these pictures in. They are so cool to have! Elena’s little feet are kicking me a lot today! I have felt constant flutters since almost the moment I got up this morning. But I love the feeling. Everyone tells me to just wait until she gets bigger and then those kicks won’t feel so nice! 62 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 POSTED BY AMY AT 11:15 AM 63 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2007 Her name I had to post one more time today about Elena’s name. It’s funny because now that we’re able to tell people we’re having a girl, they ask what her name is. And when I say "Elena Marie," most of them say "How do you spell that?" I can understand their curiosity. I have seen it spelled with an "A" also. A few people who have seen her name in print have already asked me how we’ll be pronouncing it. It’s ELLAY-NUH. Not Ellen-Uh. Poor Elena. She’s not even born yet and people don’t know how to spell or say her name! But I think Elena is such a beautiful, elegant name. It’s unique too. I don’t know any Elena’s in real life. As most people already know, her middle name is the same as Darlene’s. When Elena is old enough, I can tell her where her middle name came from and let her know all about Darlene. Another thing I was thinking about...I think I may have actually come up with the name Elena because I used to jokingly call Darlene "Darlena" (dar-lay-nuh) – among other things! That girl had a million nicknames from her friends and her family. I guess I kind of liked the way Darlena sounded, so I changed it up to Elena instead. POSTED BY AMY AT 2:30 PM TUESDAY, OCTOBER 02, 2007 Fair weekend Leon and I went to the fair with my parents on Saturday. Nothing about the fair ever changes, but I still enjoy going every year. And I got to eat all my favorite fair food like corn dog, fries, cheese on a stick and fried vegetables. The weather was really nice too...sunny and warm. My parents went back to the fair last night because Bucky Covington was performing. I’m not a country fan personally, but I know Bucky was on American Idol a season or two ago (I don’t watch American Idol either so I couldn’t tell you for sure). My dad is a big Bucky fan. I called him this morning and he said that they really enjoyed the concert. My pants are really tight. I went to Super Wal-mart last night, but I couldn’t find any maternity clothes there. I’m going to have to go to a place like Mimi Maternity. My shirts are still fine, but I could really use a couple pairs of maternity pants. While I was in Wal-mart, I looked at all of the baby things. I bought some baby clothes hangers, a stuffed 64 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 butterfly that lights up and plays music, and a cute Halloween book about a dog. I’m trying not to buy too many of the major baby items we’ll need because we’ll (hopefully) get things for our baby shower. My mom and sister are already planning the shower. They want to hold it at my house on Saturday, January 12. I hope we can get started on Elena’s room soon. We need to pick a weekend when my dad, my sister’s husband and Leon’s brother John can come help us. Even though the room isn’t very big, it has built-in’s that will need torn out, the wallpaper needs to come down, and it needs painted. We’ll probably also replace the baseboards, the closet door and the bedroom door. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:57 AM WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 03, 2007 Baby Registry I’m so anxious to start picking out everything we need for the baby! Leon and I went to Wal-mart last night and selected items for our baby registry. I want to register at Target soon too. I know our shower is still over 3 months away, but I’m just so excited! You don’t realize how much a baby needs until you start looking at all of the things in the store! Most of the items we picked out last night were things Elena will use, but we didn’t really pick out any clothes for her yet. I couldn’t resist buying something else for her last night. It’s a pink bouncer. It’s so adorable! They didn't have the crib bedding set I wanted in Wal-mart, so I ordered it online. It has pastel colors and butterflies and flowers on it. It looks so pretty! I was able to get free shipping on it because they’ll deliver it directly to the Wal-mart closest to us and I’ll pick it up there. It should be in within 7-10 days. 65 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 Now I’m more anxious than ever to start working on her room. Even though time seems to be going slowly for me, February really isn’t all that far away. And there’s so much we need to do yet! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:36 AM WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 03, 2007 Winnie the Pooh I wanted to share one more thing about our baby registry. We wanted to get neutral baby items for things we can re-use in case our next child is a boy. We picked out this adorable Winnie the Pooh set. The items are all sold separately, but they include a stroller with a removable car seat/carrier, a second car seat/carrier (since we have two cars), a high chair, a swing, and a pack ‘n play playard. You can see the items here, but I also pasted a picture below. I can’t help but oooh-ing and aaah-ing over everything! They have the most adorable baby items available! POSTED BY AMY AT 2:04 PM 66 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 THURSDAY, OCTOBER 04, 2007 Happy Bloggiversary and Anniversary to me... Two years ago today, I started this blog. Seems hard to believe it’s been two years already! So much has changed in that time period. Tomorrow is Leon’s and my fifth wedding anniversary. Those five years really have flown by. I think our marriage gets even better as the years go by. It’s so cool because Leon and I can look at each other and know what the other one is thinking. I love having that connection with him. We have the kids this weekend. We’ll probably try to go out to dinner to El Vaquero’s tomorrow night with the kids to celebrate our anniversary. Beth is at sixth grade camp this week. She gets home tomorrow. She has a soccer game on Saturday. Andrew has a football game tonight and he has to referee three soccer games on Saturday morning. The kids keep very busy. I’m having a company come to our house tomorrow afternoon to give us an estimate on painting our downstairs rooms. I hope it’s reasonable. All of our rooms downstairs need the paint touched up, but we never have the time to do it ourselves. I hate painting and don’t really want to breathe in paint fumes while pregnant anyway. And Leon isn’t able to do much with his back problems. We had a company come to our house a few months ago to give us an estimate on various remodeling jobs throughout our house. Even though we still want all of those things done, we didn’t have the money to do it all at once like that. If we can do one job at a time, maybe we can afford it better. It drives me crazy because we’ve been in our house for four years now and we’ve been saying we’re going to do this and fix that, etc. from day one and none of it is done yet. Leon’s back isn’t much better. The chiropractor doesn’t want to give up on him, so he sees him 2-3 times a week. Leon thinks maybe he is slowly starting to feel better, but he’s still in a lot of pain some days. I know he wants to avoid surgery if at all possible though. Leon’s sister Becky has been in the hospital this week. She has MS and is prone to infections. She had a kidney infection and her fever went up to 103.5. I haven’t heard any updates, but I know she was still in the hospital as of yesterday. My heart breaks for her. It makes no sense why people have to suffer from debilitating diseases. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:05 AM 67 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 TUESDAY, OCTOBER 09, 2007 Fear of Bugs I have a fear of bugs. I looked up the name of this phobia and it’s called either Acarophobia or Entomophobia or Insectophobia. At any rate, I know it’s a phobia because my fear is completely irrational. I know that most bugs won’t hurt me, but they freak me out so bad that they cause me to become overly anxious. I got to thinking about this today because there was a cricket in my cubicle when I came to work this morning. A couple of my co-workers told me it’s bad luck to kill a cricket. One of them eventually scooped him up and put him outside. But I was so uneasy. I hate it when bugs hide after I spot them, and that’s exactly what he did for a while. If I can keep an eye on them (or better yet, have someone kill them for me), then I don’t feel so uncomfortable. Otherwise, I’m convinced that the bug has somehow managed to get on me and is crawling on me. Just last week, Leon opened the door to let Goldie outside and he let a huge mosquito in. It’s comical when I think back on it, but at the time I thought I was going to have a heart attack. The mosquito flew at me several times and I ran from room to room screaming because I thought he was chasing me. I couldn’t relax all night because we never did catch him. Every time I spotted him, Leon was slow to respond and he flew away again. We found him dead in the dining room a couple days later. We also have these God-awful creatures in our basement. I thought they were silverfish, but I looked them up and they’re actually called house centipedes. They are so disgusting. They’re huge and they run so fast you can never kill them. I would die if one of them crawled on me! We also tend to get ants in our kitchen in the spring, and even a tiny ant is enough to make me ill. Maybe my phobia started as a child. I remember my parents telling a story about how I wouldn’t go outside for an entire summer because I was afraid a bug would land on me (I must have been really young because I don’t recall this). My parents also used to get cockroaches in their house because they live in a damp area. Several roaches have crawled on me over the years (one even managed to get inside my coat once), so these experiences traumatized me. Aside from an occasional bee sting (thankfully I’m not allergic to them), I’ve never been harmed by a bug. My fear might seem more legitimate if a bug had actually hurt me somehow. Leon thinks my fear is ridiculous. He was not amused by the drama I caused over the mosquito last week! People probably think I’m strange when they see how I react to bugs. But for whatever reason, that is one thing I just cannot deal with. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:30 AM 68 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 10, 2007 2007 Shopping for clothes I think 22 weeks is when my belly finally "popped." I still don’t have a huge pregnant belly or anything, but my regular pants still fit me last week. This week, none of them will button! On Monday and Tuesday, I wore dress pants to work and realized how tight they were. I had to walk around with my pants unbuttoned all day (I untucked my shirt to cover up the fact that they weren’t buttoned). The pants I have on today will still button if I pull them really low, underneath my belly. People probably wonder why my pants are hanging so low today though! I need to buy maternity pants asap! And some maternity shirts too. I can still wear most of my regular shirts, but some of them appear to be too short and don’t cover my belly fully. I’ve been very reluctant to buy any clothes this far. I don’t even like buying clothes when I’m not pregnant! I’m just not a clothesloving type of girl. I really have no choice at this time though – I have to have some things that will fit! I work with a woman who seems like she wears a different outfit every day of the year. I recycle the same pants and shirts weekly. Luckily, I work in a "business casual" office so I don’t need suits or skirts or dresses, unless we have some fancy event going on (which isn’t very often). I currently own only one pair of jeans! I wear these every Friday since we can "dress down" that day. I wonder if my co-workers have noticed by now that I always wear the same jeans? I would much rather spend my money on things for our home. I love shopping, I just don’t love shopping for clothes. If money was no object, I’m sure I’d be much more likely to go on a clothes shopping spree. But as the case may be, I don’t mind only owning a few outfits. In my opinion, there are more important things in life than what we wear! POSTED BY AMY AT 8:55 AM WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 17, 2007 Busy week I thought I’d take a few minutes to post an update. I’ve been so busy at work this week. The magazine was due on Monday and I finally finished it up this morning – it was a very challenging issue layout-wise so I was late getting everything together. Our association also has a remodeling trade show tomorrow night that I’ve been coordinating. There are always so many last-minute details with this event. I’ll probably have to stay late tonight to get everything ready for tomorrow. I’ll be glad when this week is over! I had an appointment with my OB on Monday. The baby’s heartbeat was the same as it always is, 160. My doctor said that everything looked good on the ultrasound I had a few weeks ago and my quad screen came back normal. I’m so grateful. My next appointment is on November 12 and I have to have the 69 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog glucose test at that time to check for gestational diabetes. 2007 My doctor wants me to get a flu shot this month. She doesn’t give them, so I had to make an appointment with my family doctor. I’m scheduled to get a flu shot on Friday morning. I’m still feeling pretty good, except my heartburn never seems to get any better. I forgot to ask my doctor about this on Monday! I still take Tums every day, but they don’t do much. My heartburn seems like it lasts all day. I actually think it’s worse when I’m at work because I sit all day. If I can be up moving around and not slumped over in a chair I feel better. I think when I sit, my insides get all compressed and squished and that just makes the heartburn worse. That’s my theory anyway! I went to Target and Meijer last week to look for maternity clothes. I wasn’t very impressed with either store’s selection, but I did end up buying three pairs of pants and four shirts. I need to go to an actual maternity store like Mimi Maternity and get some more things. I really need shirts. None of my regular shirts fit me right anymore...they tend to ride up and not cover my belly completely! Leon and I didn’t get much accomplished on the baby’s room last weekend. I managed to get some of the junk cleared out of the room, but there is still so much more to do! I bought an adorable ceiling fan for her room this week. It’s pastel with flowers and butterflies on it. The crib bedding set I ordered from Walmart also came in this week, so I picked that up. Leon’s mom and his brother John and John’s wife Karen are staying with us this weekend. We have the kids, and Beth’s birthday is on Saturday. She’ll be 12. We plan to have a party for her on Saturday. She has a soccer game on Sunday. It will probably be another busy weekend. POSTED BY AMY AT 10:11 AM FRIDAY, OCTOBER 19, 2007 I'm thrilled it's Friday! I’m so glad it’s Friday! I’m especially glad that the remodeling show is over! Last night’s event went pretty smoothly overall. It would have been nice to see more consumers there, but the exhibitors seemed content for the most part so I was relieved. I tried to sit when I could, but I was on my feet a lot last night. I didn’t get home until about 10:00 p.m. and I noticed my feet and ankles were swollen. They look better this morning though. Quite a few people noticed I’m pregnant last night, which was cool! Up until now, people either couldn’t tell or didn’t dare ask in case I was just gaining weight and not pregnant. I had several people rub my belly. People love touching pregnant women, don’t they? I had to get a flu shot this morning. I was literally in the doctor’s office for two minutes! I checked in, I sat down, the nurse gave me the shot and I left! My arm is a little sore and red, but it was no big deal. I’ve had plenty of flu shots in the past, so I have no reason to believe I’d have a negative reaction this time either. 70 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 I doubt I’ll get to relax much this weekend since we’ll have family in town for Beth’s birthday. I think next week will be less stressful at work though, so that’s good. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:42 AM MONDAY, OCTOBER 22, 2007 Pink eye? When my eye doctor’s office opens at 9:00 a.m. this morning, I’m going to call in and try to make an appointment for today. My left eye looks really scary. The white part is all bloodshot and red. I hope I don’t have pink eye! Last Wednesday I noticed that my eye was bloodshot, but I figured it was because I’d been doing so much computer work and was stressed getting ready for the remodeling show. Unfortunately, my eye looked worse over the weekend. It doesn’t really hurt, although it feels a little scratchy. I’m still wearing my contacts which I’m sure is a bad idea if I do have an eye infection. We’ll see... I think Beth had a nice birthday. Leon took all of us to that Japanese restaurant where they cook your food in front of you for dinner. Afterward, we came back to the house and Beth opened her presents. Leon and I got her an iPod Nano, which she had been wanting. She also got some crafts, a stuffed animal, a few toys and the DVD "Evan Almighty." We watched this movie and then had some cake and ice cream. Leon’s mom, John and Karen left after lunch yesterday. Beth had a soccer game at 4:00 p.m. The weather was nice this weekend...sunny and mild. It’s supposed to get colder this week though. I suppose we can’t expect the mild weather to last forever since it’s the end of October now. Leon watched his Cleveland Indians last night and had to turn off the game before it was over because he was so depressed. They really blew it. We had such high hopes for them this year. I’m 24 weeks today. I feel Elena moving every day. She’s usually the most active after I eat. Sometimes I wake up during the night and feel her moving then too. She continues to give her mama bad heartburn though. That part never seems to get any better. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:50 AM 71 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 MONDAY, OCTOBER 22, 2007 No pink eye, only allergies I just got back from the eye doctor. I don’t have pink eye. My doctor thinks it’s just a superficial irritation caused by allergies. He also said that I have four small hair follicles in the corner of my left eye and these tiny hairs are turned inward and poking my eye, further causing irritation. He recommended that I try to pluck these hairs myself at home. I’ll try it tonight, but the thought of plucking hairs so close to my eye kind of creeps me out! I was due for my regular eye exam, so he went ahead and checked everything else while I was there. My eyes are healthy and my contact prescription hadn’t changed any from last year, so I ordered another years’ worth of contacts. I told him I was pregnant and the only part of my exam he didn’t do is dilate my pupils. He said if he gave me the eye drops to dilate my pupils, this would cause the baby’s eyes to dilate too! POSTED BY AMY AT 3:38 PM THURSDAY, OCTOBER 25, 2007 Ramblings of a first-time mom This week hasn’t been as busy at work, which is nice. I’m glad tomorrow is Friday. The weeks seem to be going by faster now, so I hope the rest of my pregnancy goes by just as quickly. The summer and my whole first trimester seemed to go so slowly and it drove me crazy! Even though this isn’t our weekend with the kids, Andrew is staying with us because Beth has an out-oftown soccer tournament. Andrew would rather stay home, so he’ll come over on Saturday morning and stay through Sunday. It would be nice if Leon and I could get a little bit accomplished on the baby’s room. John said he would come over soon to help us. Elena must be lying on my bladder because I have to go to the bathroom almost every hour! I wake up so many times a night for this reason. I have such an overwhelming sense of urgency. I used to be able to hold it, but not anymore! I’m convinced I’ll pee my pants one of these days soon. My heartburn is still really awful. I’m trying to hold out until my November 12 appointment and I’ll ask my doctor then. I can’t believe I forgot to ask her about this last time! I’m sure there are some over-thecounter remedies (aside from Tums) that I could take, but I’ve been very stubborn about taking anything. I’ve let myself suffer instead of taking any medications. It’s just a personal choice, although I’m sure it would be perfectly safe to take certain meds. I try not to complain about any of these things though. None of my symptoms have ever been that bad. I 72 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 am just so thankful for this pregnancy. I count my blessings every day for this because I honestly thought it would never happen for me. Everyone acts like I’m crazy when I say this...but I am looking forward to labor and delivery so much! Leon tells me I won’t feel this way once the contractions start. I guess we’ll see. But I’m certainly not dreading labor or even scared of it. Maybe it’s because I’ve wanted this for so long. So many women have told me what they consider their "horror stories" about how many hours they were in labor and how awful the pain was. I don’t know if they’re trying to scare me or prepare me? At any rate, it’s not working so far! ;) I’m just as excited as ever. I’m strangely curious to find out what contractions will feel like and what the whole experience will be like. I’m not opposed to having an epidural. In fact, I probably will end up having one. But I’d like to see how long I can go "natural" before resorting to an epidural. Maybe all of these things are just the ramblings of a naïve first-time mom. I personally think this is a great attitude to have though! I think everything would be much more difficult if I was dreading labor or scared of it. Our childbirth classes start on November 11 and run for four weeks. I believe each class is 3 hours. I’m looking forward to these classes too! POSTED BY AMY AT 2:46 PM MONDAY, OCTOBER 29, 2007 Weekend wrap-up I ate a Toaster Strudel for breakfast and drank some decaf coffee, and now I have terrible heartburn. It sure doesn’t take much to make my heartburn act up! Another thing I noticed since being pregnant – my nails grow so fast! It’s unbelievable. I cut them and by the following week, they’re long again. It’s really incredible. I guess I’d be happy about this if I was the type of person who loves having long fingernails. But since my job requires me to sit at a computer typing all day long, it’s better for me to keep them short. It’s funny when I think back on how I was worried that I wasn’t gaining weight and didn’t look pregnant for so long. Well, now I finally have a little belly – and I’m concerned that I’ve gained too much weight! I’ve gained 17 pounds. I have another 15 weeks to go, so that means I’ll probably gain at least another 15 pounds. Oh well. I love that my belly pops out now! I keep meaning for Leon to take some more belly shots. I’ll see if he can do that this week. I didn’t accomplish nearly as much as I wanted to this weekend. I always have such high hopes for the weekend since it’s really my only free time. But when it finally gets here, I’m so tired and all I want to do is relax and be lazy. I think I’m more tired than usual because it gets harder to stay asleep the further along I get in this pregnancy. I have to wake up several times a night to pee. But I toss and turn all night. Doctors tell you 73 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 that it’s preferable to sleep on your left side when you’re pregnant. I’ve always been a back sleeper, so it’s been a difficult adjustment for me. It seems like I flip back and forth from my left side to my right side all night long. I can never get comfortable. Leon and I went to the movies on Friday night and saw "Saw 4." It was pretty gruesome. It wasn’t bad, although some of the scenes toward the end didn’t make sense to me. Since Halloween is on Wednesday, several of the TV channels were playing horror movies this weekend. So I spent a lot of time just lying on the couch watching scary movies. It’s no wonder I didn’t get any housework accomplished! Beggars’ night is on Halloween this year. I haven’t bought any candy yet, so I need to do that today. I should have gotten candy earlier...I’m sure it’s picked over by now. We usually get quite a few trick or treaters in our neighborhood. I read that daylight savings time ends at 2:00 a.m. on Sunday, November 4. I woke up Sunday morning and thought it was supposed to end then. It’s a good thing I researched this before moving all the clocks in our house back an hour on Sunday! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:07 AM WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2007 Happy Halloween! Happy Halloween! Our boss is letting us leave at 3:00 p.m. today so we can beat traffic and get home in time for the trick or treaters (which starts at 6:00). I bought candy yesterday so I’m all ready to go. I put all the candy in a big Halloween bowl that I have and set it on the counter. Goldie jumped up last night (she’s big enough to stand up and reach the counter so nothing is safe!) and stole a Tootsie Roll out of the bowl! She carried it around to make sure we saw her. She’s so funny. She’s always stealing things like clothing, shoes, dish towels, oven mitts, etc., and then she parades around the house with them in her mouth until we see her. She loves the attention she gets when we discover what she’s done! She never destroys the things she carries – she just seems to do it because she wants to be noticed. 74 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 I told Leon I’d make dinner tonight. I feel guilty because I know I should cook more for him. He does the majority of the cooking in our house. I’ve never especially loved to cook. I’m no gourmet chef by any stretch of the imagination. But especially since I’m going to have a child now, I want to cook more. Growing up, my mom always made such great dinners for us and to this day I love her cooking. I want my child(ren) to feel the same way. I finished cleaning the house last night. I cleaned the downstairs Monday night and the upstairs last night. If only I cleaned a little bit every day, the job wouldn’t become so overwhelming. I’m the world’s worst procrastinator when it comes to cleaning though! I really need to vacuum much more than I do. Goldie must be shedding her summer coat because she has been shedding terribly lately. I always say that I find enough golden fur in the house to form a second dog! I adore goldens, but shedding is definitely a downfall of the breed. She also tends to get seasonal allergies and she gets very itchy. Then she rubs up against the couch to scratch herself and gets fur all over the couch! I have one of those magnetic fur removers that works very well on furniture though – it kind of looks like a squeegee and it takes the fur right off furniture and carpet. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:30 AM TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 06, 2007 More Belly Shots I asked Leon to take more belly shots of me last night. He was tired so the pictures aren’t great. In the first one, he must have been holding the camera crooked...because I swear the picture on our wall is actually hanging straight! Here are two shots of my belly at 26 weeks. 75 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 The flutters I was so used to feeling have turned into thumps. Elena probably weighs around 2 pounds now, so her kicks and punches are stronger. I wasn’t even sure what I was feeling at first. It almost feels like a muscle spasm in my stomach at times. But since I feel it so often, I can only assume I’m feeling the baby. My next appointment with my OB is on Monday, November 12. I have to take the one-hour glucose test at that time too. I’m not really looking forward to this. I had to take this once before a couple years ago – my RE was testing me for all kinds of things since I have PCOS, including diabetes. I remember a couple hours after taking the test, I crashed so hard! I felt dizzy and sick and disoriented and I was sure I was going to pass out. It was awful. I plan to eat and drink something afterward this time so hopefully my sugar levels don’t come crashing down so quickly like they did before. POSTED BY AMY AT 8:56 AM WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 07, 2007 The holidays can be hard One of our local radio stations has already started to play some Christmas music. I know once Halloween is over, the Christmas season seems to be in full swing. The stores are all decorated and selling Christmas things before Thanksgiving is even here yet! It seems kind of crazy. All of this has made me think about how difficult the holidays can be. Christmas is so focused on the family and children in particular. While I was in the midst of infertility, I can’t tell you how many times I just wanted to sleep through the whole holiday season and wake up once it was all over. It’s so heartbreaking to face Christmas with empty arms. As the year ends, it’s just another painful reminder that you’re still not a mom. Just because I’m pregnant doesn’t mean I forget what that feels like. I still have friends from my infertility message boards who have to face another holiday season childless. My heart breaks for every one of them. They are so deserving of children. Why can’t they be mommies too? It seems so unfair. 76 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 I’ve also been thinking about Darlene’s family. I know how hard it will be for them to get through their first holiday season without Darlene. The holidays are often a painful reminder of loss and what we don’t have. I’m thinking of all of you who are hurting this holiday season. My thoughts and prayers are with you. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:00 AM WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 07, 2007 Numbers and Directions I had to post again today about something that I consider mildly amusing. I’m trying to update some of my work’s forms and flyers for 2008 now, since I’ll be on maternity leave for half of February and probably most of March. I’ve been working on our magazine ad rate sheet and for some reason, the ad sizes are confusing me terribly. In the past, I just copied off an old ad rate sheet that we have. But my boss realized the ad sizes on this form aren’t actually correct, so I need to figure out how to revise them. It’s blowing my mind trying to figure out what a 3/4-page ad is in inches, for example. Math is not my friend. Which made me realize how terrible I am at math. I’ve always said I think I’m missing the part of my brain that comprehends numbers. I was never great at math in school. I almost failed Geometry in high school (I think I ended up getting a D average for the year). Thank God I never actually use any complex math in my daily life. I don’t know why numbers confuse me so. I imagine numbers appear to me as letters might appear to a dyslexic person. They just look like a foreign jumble that I can’t make heads or tails of. I can’t add, subtract, multiply or divide anything complex in my head. Thank God for calculators. And you should see me trying to figure out tips in restaurants! Leon’s ex-wife is an accountant. I can’t imagine having a job where I would be responsible for numbers. I think I’d go insane. I still use "touch points" when I add or subtract. This is a trick I learned in the third grade. I don’t even know if they teach it anymore, although I was able to find some information about it on the Internet. This seems to help me somewhat. I can only assume that my math deficiency is somehow related to how "directionally challenged" I am. I get lost so easily when driving anywhere. Someone once told me that I couldn’t find my way out of a paper bag, and that’s true. I have a notebook in my car with printed directions to all the places I have to go. Of course I know how to get to places if I’ve driven there enough. But if I don’t go to certain places on a regular basis, I can’t remember how to get there. I hate when people tell me to go north, south, east or west. I have absolutely no clue what that means. I have to be told to go left or right. I despise driving in downtown Columbus. No matter how many times I go down there, I get lost. There are too many one-way streets. Leon works down there and it amazes me 77 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 that he is able to find his way (he has no problem with directions though – or math for that matter). It’s comical when I think about how many times I’ve been lost. At the time there was nothing funny about it, but I can look back on all of those times and laugh now. I rely heavily on programs like Yahoo Maps or Mapquest when I have to go anywhere. I really need to buy a GPS for my car. Leon has one and I’ve borrowed it on occasion. It’s really helpful to have someone tell me to turn left or right and how many miles I need to drive. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. It’s always been apparent that math and directions are NOT my strengths. I just hope Elena doesn’t inherit her mother’s terrible math skills and sense of direction. I also hope for her sake that she doesn’t get my God-awful curly hair. I wouldn’t mind if she inherited my dimples though! POSTED BY AMY AT 11:11 AM FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 09, 2007 I love that I look pregnant now! The girls at work commented on how my belly has really seemed to pop out over the last couple weeks. I actually look pregnant now and I love it! I spend quite a bit of time admiring my pregnant belly. You can’t tell I’m pregnant by looking at me from behind. I’m carrying all my baby weight in the front. I have a definite need for more maternity shirts. Unless my regular shirts are really long, I can no longer wear them because they don’t cover my belly. I bought two new maternity shirts at Target this week that are really cute. I need to buy some maternity jeans also. I’ve had this weird craving for ice lately. I read that this is actually a form of pica, which seems strange because ice isn’t inedible. But craving ice could mean that I have an iron deficiency or even anemia. I’ll tell my doctor about my weird craving when I see her on Monday. I’ll sit at my desk at work and eat ice all day long. Even if this is considered pica, I don’t have any dangerous cravings for non-food items. We don’t have the kids this weekend, and I REALLY want to get some work done on the baby’s room. I’m getting so impatient! There is so much to do in there and I’d hate to leave it until the last minute. We can’t seem to get any family members to help us right now, so it looks like we’ll be doing most of it ourselves. I’d just feel better if we at least got started on it. That being said, Leon isn’t much help with anything right now because his back and leg are hurting him so much. He still sees his chiropractor, although he only goes every 2 weeks or so. He thought it would be a good idea to have a massage this week, so he got one on Tuesday night. He woke up on Wednesday feeling even worse than he has been. I’m sure the massage worked his muscles and maybe aggravated the condition. He took Wednesday and Thursday off work and basically laid around all day and popped muscle relaxants. I’m afraid his best bet to end this pain would be to have surgery, but he doesn’t even want to talk about that option right now. He can’t go on indefinitely in the condition he’s in though! 78 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 We have our first childbirth class on Sunday. We have to bring pillows...I assume we’ll be sitting on the floor to do breathing exercises. This course kind of covers everything – breathing techniques, pain management options, breastfeeding, newborn care, a tour of the hospital maternity ward, etc. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:06 AM MONDAY, NOVEMBER 12, 2007 One more week until my third trimester begins! I had a pretty productive weekend. I got a lot of things cleared out of the baby’s room on Saturday, so I feel better about things. I still need to put things down in the basement (and organize the basement). We’ll see if I can accomplish that after work this week – although by the time I get home from work, I’m usually feeling pretty unmotivated and just want to relax. We had our first childbirth class yesterday. It was good. There were about 10 couples in the class, including us. The instructor is very nice. She showed us pictures and videos and we did some practice breathing exercises. We have three more classes to take the next three Sundays. I wish I could say Leon was doing better, but he’s in terrible shape. I don’t know if the massage was what triggered all of this, but he certainly got worse right afterward. He went to the doctor on Saturday morning. His doctor recommended another chiropractor who has some kind of special machine that presses on your back. Leon is supposed to make an appointment with him today. The doctor also gave Leon Tylenol with codeine to help with the pain, but unfortunately that hasn’t helped him at all. He is in terrible pain. He can barely get out of bed and can hardly walk (he’s actually been crawling around the house!). It’s a miracle he was able to come to the class with me yesterday, although he was in so much pain toward the end he had to sit on the floor (which worked out fine because we did our breathing exercises on the floor). His doctor also told him that he could have an epidural, which would offer temporary pain relief. I never heard of men getting epidurals. Leon was going to call about having that done today. Either that or he planned to find out if he could get stronger pain medication since the Tylenol isn’t helping. I’m really worried about him. I can’t have him laid up when the baby gets here! I really hope he’s able to get some help soon and start to heal before February – even if that means resorting to surgery. Luckily Leon’s work has been very understanding about his back problems. He’s able to work from home most of the time anyway, although he still usually goes into the office every day if he can. He may have to see about getting on disability if he ends up having back surgery though. I don’t know how all of that works. I had an appointment with my OB this morning. I had to take the one-hour glucose test first. The orange stuff they make you drink isn’t that terrible – it kind of tastes like flat orange pop. But they make you drink it pretty fast, so it kind of made my stomach feel queasy. I had to get my blood drawn an hour after I drank it. They said they’d only call me if the test comes back abnormal, so hopefully I don’t hear from them. After my appointment, I drank orange juice and ate some mini donuts in my car on the way to work. I was hoping this would help keep my blood sugar stable so it doesn’t drop so drastically like it did 79 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog the last time I took the glucose test. So far I feel ok. 2007 My doctor measured my stomach and listened to the baby’s heartbeat (it was 154 today). All was well. She wrote me a prescription for Zantac after I told her how bad my heartburn is. Even though she said it’s safe to take during pregnancy (she told me there is no reason to suffer), I’m reluctant to get the prescription filled. I know I’m probably being ridiculous, but the "hardest" thing I’ve taken so far during my pregnancy has been Tums! We’ll see if I change my mind... Since I’ll be in my third trimester starting next Monday (I’m 27 weeks today!), my doctor now wants to see me every 3 weeks instead of 4. So my next appointment with her is on Monday, December 3. I’m so excited to be starting my third trimester soon! It doesn’t seem possible that I’m finally here. The baby’s movements are much harder now. I especially feel them when I lay down at night to sleep. It’s the coolest feeling ever! Leon hasn’t been able to feel her move yet. Every time he puts his hand on my stomach, she stops moving! It’s like she knows he’s trying to feel her and she won’t perform on command. At times, you can actually see my stomach moving though! Leon did witness this on Saturday night. I just lay in bed at night and stare at my belly to see if it will move. It’s so much fun! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:29 AM TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2007 Skyline Chili I went grocery shopping last night after work and saw some frozen Skyline Chili dip. My aunt made this last Christmas and the homemade version is so wonderful! I bought the frozen version and we had this with tortilla chips last night. The frozen version was surprisingly good. Here is the recipe for the homemade version if you’re interested: Our Famous Skyline Chili Dip Ingredients: One 12 oz. package softened cream cheese One 13 oz. frozen Skyline Chili thawed OR one 15 oz. can of Skyline Chili 1/4 cup diced onions (optional) 12 oz. shredded mild cheddar cheese Spread softened cream cheese evenly on bottom of 9 x 13 microwaveable casserole dish. Heat chili according to package directions. Pour heated Skyline Chili over cream cheese. Sprinkle diced onions (optional) on top of chili. Cover with shredded mild cheddar cheese. Conventional oven: Heat at 350 degrees for 10-15 minutes or until cheese is completely melted. Microwave oven: Heat on high for 2 minutes or until cheese is completely melted. 80 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 Let stand 5-10 minutes before serving. Serve with nacho or corn chips. Maybe it’s just an Ohio thing, but I love Skyline chili! There’s one near my work and I go there every so often for their 3-way chili and cheese coney. I just might have to get this for lunch today – I’m starting to crave it now! Leon’s back seemed to be a little bit better last night. He went back to work yesterday and he was no longer crawling. He didn’t end up getting an epidural or more pain medication, but he made an appointment with the new chiropractor on Thursday. I hope he can hold out until then! The chiropractor he’s going to is actually the dad of one of Beth’s soccer teammates. I didn’t get any work done on the basement last night like I hoped. Maybe I’ll try to do that tonight. I’ve been so tired in the evenings lately. I think it’s because I’ve been sleeping worse than ever. I can never get comfortable. I toss and turn all night and just when I get comfortable, I have to get up and go to the bathroom! I’ve also been having some weird, vivid dreams. Last night, I dreamed that Leon got fired from his job because he missed so much time due to his back problems! I was so upset since we have a baby on the way that we need to support. Then my dream changed into working on the baby’s room. There were all these people helping and I have no idea who most of them were. The end result was something I wasn’t too happy with – the room was painted in all of these crazy colors and there were 1970’s posters on the ceiling like Charlie’s Angels and stuff! Then I dreamed that I was riding my bike on the road near my parents’ house. I lost control of my bike and it started to go over a cliff. I managed to grab onto a tree branch and pull myself back onto the road so I didn’t go over the cliff, although the bike crashed below. I remember thinking what a close call that was! Strange stuff. I can’t believe Thanksgiving is next week! Our boss is letting us leave at noon on Wednesday and we get Thursday and Friday off. The kids are with us this year, so we’re heading to Medina to spend time with Leon’s family. I’m not sure what we’ll do for Christmas yet. Our families live just far enough apart that we can’t visit both of them in one day. So we have to alternate holidays with them, which gets tough – I don’t want to upset anyone! The kids come over around noon on Christmas Day and then they’ll be with us through New Year’s. Our boss told us yesterday that he’s giving us December 24, 25 and 26 off, as well as December 31 and January 1. At our staff meeting yesterday, we tried to talk him into letting us have December 27 and 28 off too so that would give us the whole week off (actually, that would be 11 days in a row off!). He didn’t agree to that though, but maybe he’ll change his mind in the next month! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:14 AM 81 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 14, 2007 Basement Organization I am so proud of myself! I managed to clean and organize a decent portion of our basement last night. I was feeling very tired at work all day yesterday (I slept worse than usual the other night), so I planned to just go home last night and relax. But once I got home, my energy seemed to return. I had to do laundry anyway, so I figured I might as well do some cleaning while I was down in the basement. I’m pleased with the way it turned out. I didn’t lift anything very heavy. If I had to move a box, I pushed it or kicked it across the floor instead of picking it up. We still have an awful lot of "junk," but I put a lot of things in boxes and piled it up – so it looks like organized junk now. The large majority of stuff in our basement belongs to Leon! He is so messy. He uses the basement as his computer work area. He has an unbelievable amount of computer parts and pieces. He also has a lot of electronic equipment...old VCRs and DVD players and cable boxes and wires. I didn’t know what to do with all of his things, so I just put everything in boxes. He can sort through everything when he feels better. Unfortunately, he wasn’t able to help me at all last night – his back was still hurting, so he laid on the couch most of the evening. I still have quite a bit to do in the basement. I basically got one corner accomplished, so I have three more corners to go! But I feel much better about things. Since we’ve been using the baby’s room as storage, almost everything in there will have to be moved to the basement soon – so at least we’ll have room to put things now. It’s incredible how one family can have so much stuff! I only screamed one time while I was in the basement last night! I picked something up and thought there was a bug on it so I screamed. It turned out that it wasn’t a bug after all. Leon didn’t even respond when I yelled – he must be used to false alarms when it comes to my bug sightings. I’m feeling a little sore today from my basement cleaning though. I mostly feel it in my legs and thighs, probably since I used my legs to kick boxes around. I’m sure all pregnant women experience this, but it’s amazing how difficult it is to stand up when you’re in a sitting or lying position. It takes so much energy for me to lift myself up. It probably has something to do with the extra weight I’m carrying, although I read that your stomach muscles don’t function as well when you’re pregnant. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:41 AM MONDAY, NOVEMBER 19, 2007 So sleepy today! I’m so tired today. I haven’t been sleeping well and Goldie kept me up all night because I heard her scratching herself! We have to get her into the vet in the next couple days. Her allergies are so bad. She’s 82 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 chewed her elbows or knees (or whatever you call the part of the dog’s leg that bends) on her front two legs raw. She’s also limping, but I think it’s because it probably hurts for her to bend her legs. At least she doesn’t have her stomach chewed raw like she did a few months ago. It just seems to be her legs this time. I’m also sore from my basement cleaning on Saturday. I cleaned the other three corners of our basement. It took me hours, but I got it all done. It still looks like we have too much stuff in our basement, but at least I was able to pile everything up so it doesn’t appeared so cluttered. Now I just need to work on clearing everything else out of the baby’s room and putting it down in the basement. I met my TWIG group for breakfast at Bob Evans yesterday morning, and then we went to the TWIG Bazaar. We usually have a table of crafts in this event, but none of us were able to get any crafts together this year. So we decided we’d support the event by shopping there. The only thing I ended up buying was a dog ornament that I got Goldie’s name on. We had another childbirth class yesterday afternoon. I really enjoy these classes. They are so informative! We watched an actual birth video yesterday. We also watched a video of women in labor and their reactions to the contractions. And we learned about the different pain medications available during labor. We also did more relaxation and breathing exercises. Even though I’m still so excited about giving birth, after watching those videos the reality kind of set in and I started thinking "Oh yeah...this probably WILL hurt...A LOT." I know plans can change completely the moment you start having contractions, but my plan is to go as long as possible without an epidural. I don’t want any other kind of pain medications, but I’m not opposed to an epidural. Our instructor said that ideally women shouldn’t have an epidural until they’re dilated at least 5 cm. I’ve heard some women say they got one earlier than that though. I don’t want to be confined to my bed for a long period of time though. I’d like to be able to move around for a while because I know it can take hours before you’re dilated to 10 cm. If I could be brave and not have an epidural at all, I would do it. But I guess I’ll just have to wait and see how I feel about everything when I’m in labor! I’m 28 weeks today, so that means I’m finally in my third trimester. Only 12 more weeks or 84 days until my due date! I haven’t heard from anyone at my doctor’s office about my glucose test, so I hope that means I passed it. POSTED BY AMY AT 11:32 AM WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 21, 2007 Happy Thanksgiving! We’re heading to Medina in the morning to spend Thanksgiving with Leon’s family. Everyone except Leon’s older brother and his family should be there. I’m not sure what time Leon’s mom is serving dinner. I want to leave Columbus early because traffic is usually really heavy when heading up north on Thanksgiving Day. My corn casserole has been requested, so I have to get up there early enough to bake it! 83 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 Aside from the corn casserole, I thought I’d make that Skyline Chili dip and I was planning on baking some cookies tonight too. I’m sure we’ll have plenty of food. I have to go to the store later to get all the ingredients for everything. Leon hasn’t decided whether we’ll stay in Medina through Friday or Saturday. We have to come home before Sunday because the kids have to go to church with their mom on Sunday morning and we have our childbirth class (and tour of the maternity ward!) on Sunday afternoon. Leon’s mom’s boyfriend recently found out that he has leukemia. This is very shocking. I don’t know what his symptoms have been, but he must not have realized that anything serious was wrong – they discovered the leukemia is pretty advanced so he’s obviously had this for a while. The doctors told him that this is terminal. I don’t know what treatment options he’ll choose to go with. Leon’s sister Becky asked if we’d take her golden retriever Bailey home with us and keep him through Christmas. She needs a break from him (I think she still has about 5 other dogs – she did give at least a couple of them away). Bailey is so fat that he doesn’t (can’t?) jump and he’s pretty calm. But the last time he stayed with us, he peed in the house quite a bit which I don’t like. Goldie also gets so upset when he’s around, so I hope both dogs behave this time. I saw an article on Yahoo this morning about the discovery of ancient bug fossils. Apparently, there used to be a scorpion that was 8 feet long! The article said that scorpions, millipedes, cockroaches and dragonflies used to be huge. I can’t even imagine. Thank God the huge versions of these bugs are now extinct. I don’t think my heart could handle the discovery of an 8-foot bug in our basement! Have a Happy Thanksgiving! POSTED BY AMY AT 9:52 AM MONDAY, NOVEMBER 26, 2007 Thanksgiving recap We didn’t leave Columbus until about noon on Thanksgiving Day, so we had to sit in traffic for a long time. It normally takes us two hours to get to Medina, and it took us three instead. For some reason, 71 North is a parking lot on Thanksgiving Day – it’s literally stop and go traffic for miles. We had a nice time in Medina. All of Leon’s family (except Rob and his family) was there. Leon’s mom cooked a lot of food. I made my Skyline dip and corn casserole, and I also brought cookies I baked the night before. As usual, I ate way too much but somehow still made room for pumpkin pie for dessert. On Friday, Leon and I took the kids to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Andrew and Beth had never been there before. Leon wanted to go because they have a special Beach Boys exhibit right now. I’ve been there three times now. It never really changes much, so if you’ve seen it once that’s plenty. We had to walk quite a distance from the parking lot to the museum. I was so cold! I didn’t dress 84 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 appropriately for Cleveland weather. I was wearing my lightweight fall jacket. I never seem to remember how cold Cleveland gets this time of year! Even though Columbus has cold winters, it just doesn’t get as cold as it does up north when you’re off the lake. Leon’s sister Becky works at a steakhouse that’s located in an old Victorian house in downtown Medina. Leon’s mom took us there for dinner on Friday night. The house was built in the 1800’s and it’s supposedly haunted. We had a good meal, but we didn’t see any ghosts. On Saturday for lunch, we went to the new Italian restaurant where Leon’s other sister Tammie works. The restaurant didn’t officially open until today, so they were doing a practice run over the weekend. Tammie gave us tickets to get in, so we got a free lunch. We certainly ate well while in Medina! We came back home Saturday afternoon. We brought Becky’s golden retriever Bailey home with us. Goldie doesn’t like him. She’s growled at him and snapped at him a couple times now. It’s funny because Goldie is so sweet around humans, but she doesn’t seem to like other dogs very much. We’re keeping Bailey through Christmas. I think he’s sad though – he just lies in the same spot and keeps to himself. I’m sure he misses his mom and Goldie probably makes him nervous because she’s so mean to him. We had our third childbirth class yesterday afternoon. At the end of the class, we got to take a tour of the maternity ward. It’s very nice. The labor and recovery rooms are both private. Unless there is some kind of complication, the baby can stay in your room the whole time if you want – they don’t even have to go to the nursery. The hospital we’re delivering at requires that you stay for 48 hours (unless you have a csection and then you stay for 4 days). I figured we’d be kicked out sooner than that! I just assumed we’d have the baby and they’d send us on our way, but it’s nice they allow you to stay and recover. POSTED BY AMY AT 10:38 AM TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 27, 2007 Physical Therapy for Leon Leon finally got some reassuring news about his back yesterday. His family doctor referred him to an orthopedic surgeon, and Leon had a consultation with him yesterday afternoon. The surgeon said that he has been able to help 80-90% of his patients (who have disc issues similar to Leon’s) with physical therapy alone, without having to resort to surgery. Leon will begin physical therapy next week. The doctor told Leon that if physical therapy doesn’t help him, an epidural would be the next step and surgery would be the last resort. The doctor also put him on a medication designed for people who have seizures, although it’s been shown to be helpful to people with disc problems/pain too. This is such good news! Leon has been in pain for 24/7 the last several weeks, ever since having that massage. And he was in pain off and on for months before that too. His mom gave him some Vicodin over the weekend that she had from when she fell and hurt her shoulder. I told Leon I don’t like him taking pain meds like that because I know how easily people get addicted to them. The strongest thing his family doctor would prescribe him is Tylenol with codeine. But thankfully there are only a few Vicodin pills and no refills, so he shouldn’t become dependent on them. I think it would be very easy to become addicted to something like Vicodin. I took it a few years ago when I had my wisdom teeth removed, and it does make 85 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 you feel very relaxed and mellow – it’s a nice feeling, which is actually a scary thing! I’m just so thankful that after months of seeing our family doctor and two different chiropractors, Leon is finally seeing someone who has a plan for him. He’s gone downhill so much over the past few months and he is too young to be living with constant pain like this! It breaks my heart. He walks with a limp now, and it’s possible that this won’t ever go away completely because the doctor said that some of the nerve damage may be permanent. He can’t run. And he can’t stay in one position, whether it’s sitting or walking, for too long because the pain gets so bad. I’m just looking forward to having him recover as much as possible because he’s going to have a baby girl to take care of (and eventually chase after!) in about 11 weeks! Speaking of the baby, she entertains me so much! She is such a wiggle worm, always squirming around in my belly. I wish I had a window to her world to see what she’s doing in there. She kicks and punches me all the time. It never hurts – it’s actually an amazing feeling that I can’t even put into words. I love lying in bed at night and watching my belly move. It’s so funny to see my whole belly shake from her movements! POSTED BY AMY AT 8:40 AM WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 28, 2007 Fabric Softener A while back, Leon bought a fabric softener called Suavitel. The scent is called "Morning Sun" and it’s so wonderful! I just did laundry last night which made me think of it. All of our clothes have this fresh smell that lingers even while you wear them. I just now smelled my sleeve and sure enough, it smells like "Morning Sun!" I actually enjoy going into our basement, even to do laundry, now that it’s so clean. I admire my work every time I’m down there! John and Karen are coming over Friday night to spend the weekend with us. They plan to help us start on the baby’s room. I called my mom last night and asked if she and my dad could come over on Saturday too. It would be nice if my sister and her husband could come with them, but I don’t know what their plans are for the weekend. If we can get a bunch of people together on Saturday, we might actually get a lot accomplished! (Famous last words.) Leon also wants John to help rake the leaves in our yard. Our neighbors must hate us because our yard is so cluttered with leaves. Leon hasn’t been able to do any yard work lately because of his back. And I have an excuse because I’m pregnant. Leon was in a lot of pain last night. He started taking his new medication yesterday and was disappointed because it didn’t seem to be working. I told him he should give it a few days to kick in before he gives up on it. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:52 AM 86 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 MONDAY, DECEMBER 03, 2007 30 weeks and counting I had an appointment with my OB this morning. I passed my glucose test from a few weeks ago. I think my level was 92 or 93, which she said was good. The baby’s heart sounded good – her heart rate was in the 130’s today, so she was probably sleeping (the level tends to be near 160 when she’s awake). I told my doctor my inner thighs have been sore for the past few weeks, almost like a muscle soreness. I notice it most often when I’m up walking around. She said that it’s probably the extra weight I’m carrying or the way the baby is positioned. She said the only way she’d be concerned is if I was also bleeding, which thank God I’m not. Apparently this type of soreness can be a sign of pre-term labor, which is kind of scary! But since I’ve been sore like this for at least a month and have no other "signs" of labor, my doctor is not concerned. I’m 30 weeks today. My OB wants to start seeing me every 2 weeks now. It’s hard to believe I’m getting so close! John and Karen and my parents came over this weekend. We got a decent amount accomplished on the baby’s room. We ripped out all of the built-in’s and took the wallpaper off. John repaired the holes in the walls and sanded them. He said he still needs to make a few more repairs on the walls before we paint them. He plans to come back either next weekend or the weekend after that to do more work. Our bedroom is currently a mess though. We cleared everything out of the baby’s room and put it in our bedroom. So we have a lot to sort through and then carry to the basement. My nice clean basement is already starting to get cluttered again since John put some things down there. I guess I couldn’t expect it to stay nice forever. I really need to clean the whole house, but it’s been hard for me to do too much because I’ve been feeling so sore. I know I need to take it easy, but it’s difficult to relax since Leon has been laid up with his back problems. I know he can’t help it, but he hasn’t been able to help me do much of anything around the house lately. He had his first physical therapy session this morning – I really hope this helps him! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:48 AM WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 05, 2007 First snow of the season We got our first real snowfall of the season this morning. They had already been on the roads by the time I drove to work, so the roads didn’t seem to be slippery. But people drive so slowly when it snows – especially the first snow of the season. I can usually get to work in 15-20 minutes, but it took me about 87 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 45 minutes this morning. 2007 The snow does look pretty and it’s nice to see around Christmas time. But that doesn’t make me like it any better. It’s a pain to drive in and I hate how cold it gets. I really need to retire some place warm. Leon had another physical therapy session this morning. I hope they start to help him. He’s still in constant pain. That’s an awful way to live. I know it will take time, but he can’t go on like this forever. We haven’t put up our Christmas tree yet. Maybe we’ll try this weekend. There’s been so much going on, I haven’t been in a rush to decorate. Christmas will be a lot more fun next year when Elena’s here, and by then she’ll be old enough to enjoy Christmas. Although she’ll probably be more interested in the wrapping paper and boxes next year than the actual gifts! I’m ready to give Bailey back to Becky. He’s supposed to stay with us until Christmas, but I don’t know if I can last that long. He’s not being very well-behaved this time. The first time he stayed with us, he was an angel! The last time, he peed in the house. This time, he’s also been peeing in the house. It’s very frustrating. I don’t know what’s gotten into him or how to make him stop. He’s obviously marking his territory, but I’m tired of finding pee stains in the dining room and living room. He’s 5 years old, which is too old to be peeing in the house! I’m sure I’m biased toward Goldie because she’s our dog, but she’s so much better behaved than Bailey! She never pees in the house, unless she’s sick and has an accident. She’s long since outgrown her puppy phase, so she rarely makes messes for us anymore. She’s also very well-mannered when we eat. She’ll stare at us and hope that we’ll give her some of our food, but Bailey actually tries to take our food from us! He’s terrible about begging. I’m sure his behavior is the result of the environment he grew up in and lives in now with Becky. She has about 6 other dogs (I lost count – I think she may have given one or two away at some point), so Bailey is used to competing for his food and being aggressive and marking his territory. I feel sorry for him because he’s not a bad dog. He just needs some behavioral training and I have no idea how to do that! At any rate, I feel like I have way too many other things going on and I don’t need one more thing to worry about! So I hope we can send Bailey back to Medina soon. I got an e-mail from Sherri’s husband this morning. You might remember me mentioning Sherri – she was one of Darlene’s friends and she was also pregnant. She had a baby boy last night, Aaron Michael. Congratulations Sherri and Roger! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:49 AM 88 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 THURSDAY, DECEMBER 06, 2007 Sleepy afternoon I’m so sleepy today! I think the fatigue has seemed to come back now that I’m in my third trimester. If I lay down on the couch to watch TV at night, forget it! I fall asleep and miss my shows. Thank goodness we have a DVR and I record everything anyway. I think I’m more tired than usual today because Bailey kept me up last night. He was very restless. He paced around our bedroom. He’s so big that when he shakes his tail, it hits everything. So I heard his tail hitting the walls and the door. And he kept shaking his head so his collar would jingle and make a loud noise. Then he bit his nails! Goldie has this bad habit too. It’s funny to think dogs would chew their nails, but both goldens do this on a pretty regular basis. And then there’s poor Leon – he snores really loudly. He has sleep apnea, so I know he can’t help it. Even when I shake him or shush him, he usually keeps right on snoring. This never really used to bother me because once I fell asleep, I stayed asleep. But since I’ve been pregnant, I wake up constantly and then I can’t get back to sleep if he’s snoring too loudly. (He says that I snore sometimes too, so I have no room to talk!) Last night between his snoring and Bailey’s antics, I decided to try and sleep in Beth’s bed. I fell asleep there for a couple hours, but it’s really hard to get a good night’s sleep in a bed other than your own. I think I’ve had some Braxton Hicks contractions recently. I can’t say for certain that’s what I’m feeling, but all I know is that my stomach seems to get really hard. It’s like a tightening sensation in my belly. I don’t have them on a regular basis and they never seem to hurt. I’ll tell my doctor about it the next time I see her, but I have a feeling that they’re probably Braxton Hicks. My heartburn has been better lately. I still have it on occasion, but I don’t seem to have that every day, after every meal heartburn that I was having. I never did get the Zantac prescription filled that my doctor gave me. My co-worker’s daughter had a baby this morning. She had a little girl, Keira Madelaine. My co-worker is still at work! If I were her, I’d be really anxious and want to be at the hospital so I could see my new granddaughter! I know my parents plan to come to the hospital when they find out I’m in labor. They live an hour and a half away, but they’re going to want to see their new little granddaughter as soon as they can. I know they are so excited. That’s all they talk about! There’s a possibility that John and Karen might come back down this weekend, but they may wait until the following weekend. I know John wants to finish repairing the wall in the baby’s room before we start painting. I need to get the boxes that were in the baby’s room out of our room, so I’ll attempt to do that this weekend. I think Leon will be able to help me. He’s been trying to carry a few things this week and he organized some of his computer equipment in the basement, although he’s still hurting pretty bad. He told me it’s a 24/7 kind of pain, but some days the pain is more tolerable than others. POSTED BY AMY AT 2:54 PM 89 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 FRIDAY, DECEMBER 07, 2007 More snow... It snowed again this morning. To me it doesn’t look like much snow, but it was somehow enough to cause schools to be cancelled and delayed. I wondered why my ride into work was so easy! There was no school traffic. The main roads are in good shape. I was actually the first one into work this morning, even though I was about 10 minutes late! The dogs love the snow. They run around in it and chase each other. It’s so cute! They came inside last night after one of their potty breaks and their faces were covered with snow. Speaking of dogs, you remember yesterday I mentioned my co-worker’s daughter had a baby. My coworker and her husband were watching their daughter’s dog while she’s in the hospital. Somehow the dog got off their back porch yesterday afternoon and ran away. My co-worker left me a voice mail this morning saying she was taking the day off to find the dog. She was crying on the phone – she’s obviously very upset. That’s totally understandable. I’d be devastated if Goldie ran away! I feel so bad for all of them. It should be such a joyous time for them with the birth of a new baby. I hope they find the dog soon. John and Karen aren’t coming down this weekend, but they plan on coming down next weekend. We don’t have the kids this weekend either, so this will be the first weekend in several weeks where we haven’t had anything going on! It will be a nice change of pace. I hope we get some things accomplished around the house though. I’m proud of Leon because he’s been helping organize his computer equipment in the basement and it doesn’t look as cluttered as it did before. I hate clutter. That’s one thing that bothers me so much! Since our computer room is being transformed into the baby’s room, Leon decided to move all of his computer equipment down to the basement. I’m going to put my computer on the vanity table in our bedroom. Leon also has a laptop that he works on a lot, so he won’t have to go to the basement every time he wants to get online. Most of the TV shows I watch are repeats until the holidays are over. The last "Heroes" until January was on Monday night. I recorded it on our DVR and watched it the other night. It was really good! I love that show. That’s probably my favorite show right now. You have to watch every episode or you’ll get confused though – there are so many characters to follow. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:38 AM 90 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog TUESDAY, DECEMBER 11, 2007 2007 Relaxing weekend We have a holiday party after work tonight. Our Board of Trustees and Committee and Council members are invited too. I didn’t have any holiday-looking maternity shirts so I bought something at Target last night. It’s a simple red dress shirt, but it’s actually too tight! Target only had one decent red shirt and it was smaller than my normal size, but I was desperate. I need to wear it one more time after this – Leon’s boss has a holiday party at his house next Thursday. So hopefully I can get through a few hours in a tootight maternity shirt! It’s funny how people assume it’s ok to say anything they want about a pregnant woman’s weight. I went to Kroger on my lunch break yesterday and when I walked by the guy ringing the Salvation Army bell, he asked "Are we talking twins or triplets here?" I told him I’m only having one. And then we had a meeting at work this morning and one of our members commented how I’m really gaining weight and I need to lay off the beer! I realize these people were joking, but can you imagine how offensive those comments would be if I weren’t pregnant? I don’t think I look too big. I’m rather proud of how I’m carrying my baby weight. I’ve gained almost 30 pounds (how did that happen?!), but all of my weight seems to be in my stomach. I’ll have to post another belly shot soon and you can tell me if you think I look fat! ;) I didn’t have one Braxton Hicks contraction over the weekend because I basically did nothing. I did have some yesterday though. So they’re obviously triggered by doing a lot of activity. It was a nice change of pace to do nothing this past weekend! I slept in until about 1:00 p.m., but considering I wake up every 12 hours during the night it didn’t seem that late to me. Then I laid on the couch and watched TV for hours. I just felt like I needed to rest. I did clean the downstairs Sunday night, but that was the extent of my work. I let the dogs out at 6:00 a.m. yesterday morning and I discovered that one of them (my money is on Bailey) pooped twice in the dining room! What a mess. I don’t know what gets into Bailey. I really hope John takes him back home when he comes down this weekend. As far as I know, John and Karen are coming back down to help with the baby’s room on Saturday. They should be able to finish repairing the wall and then paint. We’ll see if they can get new baseboards in the room too (they already ripped out the old ones). I’d love to get the room done so I can see about ordering new carpet, and then we can finally buy the baby’s furniture. My parents are being so generous. They’ve offered to buy the crib, dresser, changing table, bookcase and rocking chair! Since she is their first (biological) grandchild, I think they’re really going to spoil her. POSTED BY AMY AT 12:07 PM 91 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 12, 2007 Tired and Sore I’m tired (again) today. I had to stay at work until 9:00 p.m. last night to help clean up after our holiday party was over. I was feeling very sore afterward. I never want to seem like I’m complaining because I am so grateful for this pregnancy and this baby. But I never realized how uncomfortable your body gets as you near the end of your pregnancy. Some days it feels like everything is sore. This morning as I was putting on my socks, I thought about how difficult it is to perform simple tasks like this when you’re pregnant. I can’t reach my feet very well because my belly gets in the way! I was thinking about painting my toenails, but I can only imagine how hard that would be. It’s also extremely difficult to shave your legs when you’re pregnant! And if you drop something on the floor? Forget about it. It’s too difficult to reach down and pick it up. Last night at our party, another member commented on how "fat" I am. He said something about how I better stop eating because my belly is getting too big. It’s amazing how many times I’ve been "insulted" about my weight this week! Maybe I’m bigger than I actually believe myself to be! Leon put up our Christmas tree a couple nights ago. The past couple of years, we’ve just been using a small, fiber optic tree. Other than hanging stockings, we don’t decorate our house very much. I plan to get a nicer fake tree next year and decorate more. Next Christmas will be so much fun since Elena will be about 10 months old. This year though, I feel like there’s too much else going on to really worry about decorating for Christmas. I still haven’t started my Christmas shopping. I plan to do that next week. There’s nothing like waiting until the last minute! I don’t really have too much to buy, so hopefully I can get it all finished in one shopping trip. I just realized I have two vacation days I have to use up before the end of the year or I’ll lose them. So I decided to take December 27 and 28 off. That means I’ll have December 22 through January 1 off work – 11 days! And we only have to work half a day on December 21 because we have our staff holiday lunch that day and we always get to go home afterward. I have 5 additional days of vacation left, but I can carry them over to 2008. That will give me 3 weeks of vacation next year, and I plan to use it during my maternity leave. That way, I’ll receive 3 weeks of my 6week leave at my full salary. My boss said that I can have 50% of my salary for the other 3 weeks, which I thought was very generous. I originally thought that my maternity leave would be a 6-week unpaid leave. It would be nice if I could have more time off, but unfortunately the Family Medical Leave Act doesn’t apply to my company because we only have 8 employees. If I worked for a place that had at least 50 employees, I could have 12 weeks off – although that would also be an unpaid leave and I’m not sure we could survive 12 weeks without an additional salary anyway. Leon had another physical therapy session this morning. After this week, he has one more week of three sessions and then his doctor will re-evaluate his condition. So far Leon hasn’t felt much (if any) relief, but it would be wonderful if that changed within the next week. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:52 AM 92 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 THURSDAY, DECEMBER 13, 2007 So stressed out... I hate to complain and seem ungrateful because I’m not at all. I think my lack of sleep is catching up with me though. I’m feeling so overwhelmed and in such a bad mood today. I don’t think I slept one full hour last night. Some nights it’s impossible for me to sleep. I know the kids and even Leon are enjoying having Bailey around, but I need him to go back home asap. I just can’t handle one more thing to take care of right now. When I let him and Goldie out at 7:00 a.m., he tracked mud everywhere! I know it wasn’t Goldie because I checked her paws. He ran through the family room, kitchen, dining room and living room with his muddy paws before I could stop him. I managed to wipe off his paws and clean up the kitchen floor, but the carpet in the other rooms are a muddy mess. I told Leon he would have to clean it. I just can’t bring myself to do it. I’m the one who always has to clean up after him and I can’t take it anymore. Leon told me last night that John has to work on Saturday, so he and Karen might not be able to come down after all. I start to feel panicked because the baby’s room needs to get finished! Everyone tells me to relax because the baby won’t care whether her room is finished or not once she’s born. But I care and it’s driving me crazy that it’s not done. I wish we had done the whole project earlier because now I’m so sore and tired that I can’t help much at all. We still need to paint the walls, put down new baseboards, get new carpet, buy and assemble her furniture, and decorate her room. I had originally hoped to have all of that done by January 12 because that’s when my baby shower is, but I just don’t see that happening now. Our bedroom is a mess and has been for the past 2+ weeks. We still have all those boxes from the baby’s room piled everywhere. They need to be carried to the basement and I can’t do it by myself and Leon can’t help. I’m so overwhelmed with taking care of the whole house with no help from Leon. I know he can’t help it, but it’s really getting me down. The upstairs hasn’t been cleaned for probably a month and it’s hard to do with boxes piled everywhere. Work has also been stressful. There’s always some kind of drama to contend with and it’s hard for me to focus because I’m so tired. I haven’t done any Christmas shopping and I know I’m running out of time. I have two holiday events to go to next week (a Christmas dinner for my Twig group on Tuesday night and Leon’s work holiday party on Thursday night), so that limits the time I have to shop. One positive thing is that Leon’s back is feeling better from physical therapy. One of the therapists helped align his back at his session yesterday, and Leon felt almost instant relief. His leg is still really bothering him, but it’s great that his back is feeling better. Of course the therapist can’t guarantee the pain will stay away. She said like with any major injury he has to give himself time to heal, which of course means no lifting or doing anything that will aggravate the condition. Thanks for reading my rant. I know I just need to take a deep breath and try to relax, but my brain is racing a million miles a minute with everything I need to get done before the baby gets here. POSTED BY AMY AT 9:30 AM 93 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 MONDAY, DECEMBER 17, 2007 UTI? I saw my OB this morning. She thinks I might have a urinary tract infection! She said pregnant women don’t often have the traditional symptoms of a UTI, so they may not even know they have one. This is true for me. I have to pee all the time, but I assumed that was because the baby is pressing on my bladder. I’ve had UTI’s in the past (before I was pregnant) and I was absolutely miserable with them. My doctor wrote me a prescription for Marcobid and I have to start taking it today. I have to call the office on Wednesday to find out my test results. If I don’t have a UTI I can stop taking the antibiotic, but if I do have one I need to take it for 7 days. My doctor didn’t seem concerned, so I guess I shouldn’t be either. Other than that, my appointment was fine. My blood pressure was good. The doctor didn’t tell me the baby’s exact heart rate, but Elena was very active when she listened to her heart. She could tell she was moving all around and kicking. She also felt my stomach and said that she thinks the baby is already in the head-down position, which is great! That (hopefully) means she’ll stay in that position until I give birth, so I shouldn’t have to worry about her being breech. The doctor said her knees and thighs appear to be up my belly button, which is where I feel the strongest movements and where my belly seems to move around the most. The kids helped carry the boxes from our bedroom into the basement yesterday. It’s nice to have the boxes out of our room and to be able to see the floor again. Tonight I need to clean our bedroom and the rest of the upstairs because I haven’t done so in about a month! Of course, now the downstairs is dirty again too. I can never keep up with the house work. Goldie started limping on Saturday. I feel so sorry for her. We determined it’s her left front paw that seems to be hurting her, although it doesn’t appear to be broken and there are no marks on it. Hopefully it’s just a sprain. We got some snow and freezing rain on Saturday, and Goldie and Bailey played outside for a while so she may have hurt it then. We took Bailey to Petsmart yesterday to get his picture taken with Santa. Becky does this every year, so we wanted to get the picture taken for her. Andrew and Beth were in the picture too. It turned out cute. Bailey was very good while he was out. We didn’t take Goldie because she gets so nervous when she travels anywhere. We figured she’d completely flip out if we tried to get her to pose with Santa! We’re hoping we can get some family members to come over the weekend before New Year’s and help finish the baby’s room. Everyone told me my feelings of panic are normal because I want my "nest" to be perfect for the baby. I have to believe that we’ll get everything finished in time! POSTED BY AMY AT 10:38 AM 94 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog FRIDAY, DECEMBER 21, 2007 2007 Family drama My sister’s husband Jamie is in the hospital. He had been having trouble swallowing and he had a procedure done on Monday where they tried to widen his esophagus. Afterward he was having a lot of pain, but the doctor told him this was normal since his esophagus would be irritated for a few days. He passed out at work yesterday and they took him to the hospital in Coshocton. It turns out that he has a tear in his esophagus as a result of the procedure and a serious infection could form as a result. They took him by ambulance to OSU Hospital in Columbus yesterday afternoon. Since Julie and Jamie’s "good" car broke down, all they have is my sister’s old car. She can’t drive it very far, so my parents had to bring her to Columbus yesterday. She spent most of the day with Jamie in the hospital, but my parents brought her over to our house to spend the night around 10:00 p.m. I had to take her back to the hospital this morning before I went to work. Jamie signed waivers before having the procedure done on Monday because apparently there was a risk they could tear his esophagus. It’s unfortunate though because they think the doctor knew he tore it, but was hoping it would heal on its own so he didn’t tell Jamie. The doctor at OSU said that it appears that this doctor tried to repair his esophagus after tearing it. I don’t really understand everything that’s happened, but the tear leads to his stomach so there was concern that an infection could form and affect his other organs. It appears that they caught it in time though, so he should hopefully recover with no problems. If all is well, he’ll get to go home tomorrow (and his birthday happens to be tomorrow too!). My sister is obviously very scared and upset. I’m afraid she’s going to pass out because she has barely eaten in the past 24 hours and I don’t think she slept at all last night. She plans to stay with Jamie in the hospital all day. Leon and I have another Christmas dinner to go to tonight so we won’t be able to pick her up until around 10:00 p.m. Leon and I went to his work holiday party last night. I had my Twig Christmas dinner on Tuesday night. And today at work, we have a staff holiday lunch. We get to go home afterward and then I have the next 11 days off work! I’m looking forward to the break. I need to go shopping after lunch today since I’ve barely done any Christmas shopping. I hope to finish everything up tomorrow. It will just be Leon and me (and the dogs!) on Christmas Eve. I plan to make dinner for us. We originally wanted to have Christmas at our house, but no one in our families is able to come home. So we decided we’ll go to my parents’ house for dinner on Christmas Day. It will be a quick trip though. The kids don’t come over until about 2:00 p.m. that day. We won’t spend the night so that way we don’t have to bring the dogs with us. My parents (especially my dad) are not dog lovers, so I know they wouldn’t appreciate two dogs in their home. We don’t have any New Year’s plans yet. I was still hoping some family members could come over next Saturday and help with the baby’s room, but after everything that’s happened with Jamie this week, he and Julie probably won’t be able to come over. As promised, here is a belly shot that Leon took of me before his work party last night. I’m 32 weeks, 4 days in the picture. Do I look as fat as everyone tells me? ;) 95 Lively Days: Amy’s Blog 2007 Here is the Christmas shot of the kids and Bailey that we had taken on Sunday. Bailey wouldn’t keep his eyes open for the picture! POSTED BY AMY AT 9:08 AM 96