Helping Kids deal with Stress by xiangpeng

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									Helping Your Kids Stress
       Geoffrey Bones
     School Psychologist
1. Signs of Stress
2. Healthy Stress V. Unhealthy Stress
3. Helping kids deal with stress.
4. How do parents know if they need
   additional support?
5. Where do I go for help?
 1. Signs of Stress: Terminology
 Stress: Physical, mental, or emotional strain.
 Stressor: An event, situation, or demand
  that causes stress.
 Acute Stress: Stress associated with a
  temporary stressor.
 Chronic Stress: Stress associated with an
  ongoing stressor.
 1. Signs of Stress: What do Middle
   school Students find stressful?
Top 5 stressors on the first day of school (Carney,
1. What happens if I get lost?
2. What if I can’t get my locker open?
3. What if the work is too hard?
4. What if I don’t have anyone to sit with at lunch?
5. What if I’m bullied or harassed by older kids?
     1. Signs of Stress: Dealing with
    Both Acute and Chronic stress impairs our
     ability to deal with other stressors
1.   Major life changes or transitions
2.   Traumatic events
3.   Parental pressure
4.   Peer pressure
5.   Being overscheduled
6.   Family dysfunction
1. Signs of Stress: Physiological and
 Acute Stress:
1. Increased heart rate, perspiration, respiration
2. Muscle tension

    Chronic Stress:
1.   Gastro-intestinal problems
2.   Headaches
3.   Impairment of immune system
4.   Distractibility
5.   Irritability
6.   Symptoms of Depression and/or Anxiety:
   2. Healthy Stress V. Unhealthy

1. Eustress (Healthy) – stress that result
   from healthy endeavors.

2. Distress (Unhealthy) – stress that results
   from adversity or hardship.
    2. Healthy V. Unhealthy: What
   The difference between experiences which
    result in eustress or distress is determined

1. The nature of the event.
2. Real ability to cope with the stress.
3. Our perception of our ability to cope.
    2. Healthy V. Unhealthy: What
 Stress is a normal part of adolescence.
 Learning to cope developmental.
 Successful coping builds confidence and
  competence (Brown et al., 2006).
 Schools and parents need to work together
  to help students learn how to cope with
  stress, and avoiding stress altogether.
 3. Helping kids deal with stress.
Just C.H.I.L.L. !
 Connect with your kids.
 Help kids process stressful events.
 Identify stressful events, triggers, and
  associated feelings.
 Loosen-up through relaxation.
 Limit anxiety through preparation.
 3. Helping kids deal with stress.
Connect with your kids
 Kids who feel stronger connections to their parents
  feel more secure, have more confidence, and feel
  more competent (Donaldson, et al., 1999).
 Share interests that build your relationship.
 Talk about stress in your life and modeling healthy
 Engage in activities that combat stress together.
   3. Helping kids deal with stress.

Help kids process stressful events

 Validate their feelings.

 Understand their perspective.

 Analyze stressful events together.
 3. Helping kids deal with stress.
Identify Stressful Events
 Understand how stress feels.
 How do we as individuals react to stress?
 What sources of stress do we have in our
 Identify situations that tend to make us feel
 Keeping a stress journal.
 3. Helping kids deal with stress.
Learn to Relax
 Cognitive restructuring
 Mental Imagery
 Positive Self-talk
 Breathing relaxation
 Muscle Relaxation
 Identify healthy stress “Busters” such as
   3. Helping kids deal with stress.
Limit Anxiety through Preparation
 Organization
  – Physical materials
  – Thoughts
 Time management
  – Daily Plans
  – Mind Maps
  – Rest! Rest! Rest!
 Develop problem solving strategies
  – Break down large assignments into smaller parts
  – Coach ways of approaching new problems
   4. How do I know when I should
        Pursue outside help?
 If your child has a generally elevated level of
  anxiety, or is experiencing depression.
 If stress leads to school avoidance.
 If your child has recently experienced trauma.
 If your child continues to struggle with stressors
  despite previous efforts to teach ways of coping.
 If your child’s difficulties with stress prevent them
  from trying new things and/or enjoying life.
 If you feel unequipped to help.
        5. Where do I go for help?
   Teachers & Learning Specialists
   School Counseling Departments
   Pittsford Youth Services
   Web-Sites
 Books
    – Fighting Invisible Tigers: A Stress Management Guide for Teens.
      Earl Hipp
    – Stress Management for Adolescents: A Cognitive-Behavioral
      Program. Diane de Anda
    – Too Stressed To Think?: A Teen Guide To Staying Sane When Life
      Makes You Crazy. Annie Fox
   Brown, S., Teufel, J., Birch& D., Kancherla. (2006). Gender, age, and behavior
    differences in early adolescent worry. Journal of School Health, 76, 430-437.
   Carney, S. (2007) Top Stressors for Middle School.
   De Anda, D. (1998).The evaluation of a stress management program for
    middle school adolescents. Child and Adolescent Social Work Journal, 15, 73-
   Donaldson,D., Prinstein, M., Danovsky, M. & Spirito, A. (1999). Patterns of
    children’s coping with life stress: Implications for clinicians. American Journal of
    Orthopsychiatry, 70, 351-359.
   Valentiner, D., Holahan, C. & Moos, R. (1994). Social support, appraisals of
    event controllability, and coping: An integrative model. Journal of Personality
    and Social Psychology, 66, 1094-1102.
   Page, R.M. & Page, T.S. Fostering Emotional Well-Being in the Classroom. 3rd

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