?When we become the ultimate empathizer, we are able to identify with, understand,
and respond to other's experiences.
This has had untold benefits in my persuasion for years and now I'm sharing it with
The following exercise can be used on a new affluent prospect or anyone at all. . .
This is about understanding and being responsive of your client or prospect's
experiences and reality. You're going to have the experience of being them.
When you build up this kind of trust with someone, you're building rapport.
By employing this technique, you'll be able to naturally understand and gain deep
rapport with someone you don't know very well.
You will need a role play partner for this one.
It's this simple: Ask your role play partner to think of something. A book. A friend. An
experience. A news story. Whatever. This thought will be called 'A'. As they think this
thought, really notice their physicality. What does their body look like? How is their
posture? Notice their breathing and their muscle tension. What kind of gestures are
going along with this thought? As they think of 'A', you'll take a mental snapshot of
them. This is how they represent 'A'.
After you've got your mental snapshot, break their state by having them look around
the room or walk around and name three things they can see. This helps them to
reorient, get their mind off 'A' and return to their normal state.
Next, have them think of something different from 'A'. Call this 'B'. It doesn't have to
be the opposite, but just something completely different.
[NOTE: When you first do this exercise thinking of the opposite may make it easier,
but I encourage you to develop your skills and not use something opposite once
you've got the hang of it.]
Have them break this state.
Here's where things get interesting. Have them think of either 'A' or 'B'. They're not
supposed to tell you which, but you are to figure this out by looking at their
expressions, their snapshot.
Give them a turn. Let them try this out on you.
Obviously, you're not going to sit down with a prospect and say, 'Let's practice this
persuasion technique I just learned so that I can better understand you. . .' You're
going to practice this with friends, family or maybe even a co-worker. This will really
fine-tune your observation skills.
As you get better at this, you'll eventually be able to recognize changes in their states,
even small changes, as you talk about certain topics.
The feelings this will elicit in your prospect and client might not be easily pinpointed,
but they will feel a real connection to you.
Why bother? Well, this is simply another way to gain rapport quickly and powerfully.
It also puts your prospect into a state where they are feeling really understood.
Another use for this. . . this can help you determine if you are being lied to.
Say you have a prospective client, you're a financial adviser, and you ask them how
their finances are. Well, they may say they're "great" but their body language says
differently. These verbal and nonverbal clues give away the prospect's real situation.
You can use this along with other persuasion strategies to gain that deep sense of trust
and rapport with your prospects getting to the heart of their needs, wants and desires,
with your product or service becoming the answer they were looking for.
Kenrick Cleveland teaches techniques to sell to affluent clients using persuasion
strategies. He runs unique public and private seminars and offers home study courses,
audio/visual learning tools, and coaching programs in persuasion techniques. Find
more free articles at /blog. Be sure to sign up for his free report entitled "Yes!