HOW TO WRITE THE REPORT

PC 4881 HOW TO WRITE THE REPORT PREAMBLE A C Phillips Let me begin with what Sir Lawrence Bragg said about the science undergraduates of your grandparents’ generation: I will try to define what I believe to be lacking in our present courses for science undergraduates. They do not learn to write clearly and briefly, marshalling their points in due and aesthetically satisfying order, and eliminating inessentials. They are inept at those turns of phrase or happy analogy which throw a flying bridge across a chasm of misunderstanding and make contact between mind and matter. Nothing has changed much since this was written. Physics professors still write as badly as Sir Lawrence Bragg, and many undergraduates write even worse. However, your report will be superb if it is a genuine team effort of six or seven undergraduates. STRUCTURE The easiest problem for you to tackle is how to structure the report. It should be structured along the following lines: Executive Summary . Important, busy people will judge you on this section alone. It should contain an outline of issues examined, general observations, conclusions and recommendations. It should be concise, clear and simple. Chapter 1: Introduction This should describe the purpose and scope of the report. Chapter 2: Chapter 3: ......... ......... Chapter M: General Observations and Conclusions Chapter N: Recommendations Annex . Background information, statistical information, etc for the specialist reader. 1 CONTENT After selecting your section headings, your next task is to decide on the content: some relevant information, some intelligent analysis, some realistic recommendations, which when taken together form a coherent and persuasive report. Here are some comments that have been made on reports in the past: • A persuasive, polished and professional report. It was well structured and well written. The balance between background information and analysis was perfect. This information and analysis effectively supported the recommendations. • An report of uneven quality. The first three sections were poorly written, unfocussed, anecdotal and superficial. The later sections were more coherent, informative and thoughtful. Throughout the report the links between fact, analysis and conclusion were either weak or non-existent. Rational, logical argument in this difficult area should have been the aim. A report focussing on fewer issues would have been more useful. • The chosen framework of Economics, Political, Social, Academic was novel but very unsuccessful. It led to four repetitive and overlapping chapters full of superficial analysis and few facts. The purpose of each chapter, and how it differed from other chapters, was not clear. • An extremely well written and highly informative report. It wilted slightly after a superb, extensive first chapter. However, the causes for concern were clearly identified and the scale of the problems in all three areas of investigation were made apparent. The handling of technical terms and the control of jargon was impressive. A very strong case for new controls and legislation was made. • The first section was informative, and the implications and motivations were well described. However, the same ideas and facts emerged and re-emerged continually throughout the report. The arguments failed to develop; they were merely preached again. A more systematic account of history and facts, followed by analysis and general conclusions, would have made a more suitable framework. • This report is neatly and consistently laid out and presented. However the information is poorly structured and the prose is sometimes disjointed. The report includes a lot of information, though the number of cited references is rather low. There is only minimal connection between the body of the report and the recommendations. • This is an elegantly presented and well written report, with a sensible structure, good use of English and copious references. The report contains a wealth of information on very varied subjects. Several of the sections are excellent in themselves, in particular the need for disposal and the qualitative survey of possible methods. Unfortunately much of the report is of marginal relevance to the central issue. More information and analysis is needed to support the recommendations. • This is an informative report with a wealth of factual and numerical information. However the report is very fragmented, with lots of sections which are not well integrated, and there are relatively few serious references. The analysis is superficial, and though the recommendations seemed in the main sensible it is not clear how they 2 had been reached. The lack of quantitative financial and environmental evaluation seriously undermines the value of the report. • This is a generally well-presented report, interesting, readable, sensible, and containing a lot of information. It is focused and the structure makes sense. The placing of recommendations at the end of each chapter is wise, but they should have been brought together in the executive summary. • The report is authoritatively written and persuasive. The major weakness is a lack of quantitative financial information, and of cost-benefit analysis of the measures proposed. • The quality both of the research and the writing in this report is variable. Certain sections make interesting reading, and the presentation is generally good. A number of different issues, from technical to economic, are covered, but the reason for the ordering of the material and the relative weighting is not clear. These comments demonstrate that it is not easy to ensure that information is relevant, that analysis is intelligent, that recommendations are realistic, and that information, analysis and recommendations combine coherently. You must address these issues when you produce the final report. A quick, cut-and-paste collection of chapters by different team members will be unsuccessful.. ENGLISH PROSE After agreeing on the content of your report, your next task is to express this content in clear and concise English. When writing the report, your team should be ruthless in its fight against all forms of turgid, confused and polysyllabic prose. The end-result should be a good read which informs and educates. With this objective in mind, I offer some subjective guidance on how your team should write its report. 1. Cut the verbal fat Your report will be improved if you cut out any unnecessary words. Finding a word with the right meaning can help. Here is an extreme example: When you carefully read your report to improve your wording and catch small errors of spelling, punctuation, and so on, the thing to do before you do anything else is to try to see if you can cut out any unnecessary wordiness in your sentences. In other words: When you edit your report, first remove any unnecessary words. Sixteen words have been replaced by the word edit and the instruction is no longer wrapped in twenty woolly words. 3 Wrapping the message in woolly words is called padding. You should not pad by using too much metadiscourse as in: I would like to take this opportunity to mention that it is also of importance to bear in mind that the examiners will deduct marks if your report is full of padding. You should not pad by inserting meaningless words as in: For all intents and purposes, overall success in the Project Skills course actually requires certain skills that are really multidisciplinary in kind. Adjectives can be another source of verbiage. They should only be used to make your meaning more precise. You may refer to an economic crisis, an environmental crisis but never an acute crisis; a crisis is always acute. Similarly, a fact is always true, a prerequisite is always essential, a vacancy is always unfilled, and a gift is always free. Double-English is inherently verbose. Think twice before you write like this: First and foremost we should define and establish our aims and goals, so that each and every member of our group will be ready and willing to offer aid and assistance. Finally, your reader knows that pink is a colour, and she will be insulted if you write that she is: pink in colour, large in size, heavy in weight, and round in shape. 2. Use verbs to describe significant actions and name the agents The dangers of not following this advice have been spelt out by G.M.Young: The excessive reliance on the noun at the expense of the verb will, in the end, detach the mind of the writer from the realities of here and now, from when and how and in what mood the thing was done, and insensibly induce the habit of abstraction, generalisation and vagueness. Here are examples of excessive reliance on abstract nouns: A high degree of carelessness, on the part of students, took place. Non-enforcement of the specified offal ban caused an increase in the consumption of infected beef. Military intervention resulted in the pacification of the village. In these sentences, the actions are described by abstract nouns, limp verbs merely say the action has occurred, and the agents of the actions are either unnamed or tacked on as afterthoughts. The sentences become more forceful, informative and honest when precise verbs are used to describe the actions and when the agents are named: 4 The students were very careless. Babies ate infected beef, because the Minister did not enforce the specified offal ban. B52 bombers flattened the village. However, do not abandon abstract nouns completely. In general, use a precise verb when you describe an action for the first time, but when the action is mentioned for a second time use an abstract noun, as in: Babies ate infected beef, because the Minister did not enforce the specified offal ban. This non-enforcement is yet another illustration ...... Your should think carefully on the merits of active and passive verbs. If you use active verbs, your sentences will be direct and vigorous because they conform to the natural order of agent followed by action. However, by convention, the passive is often used in academic or bureaucratic publications, where shy, unassuming writers attempt to distance themselves from the events. Support for this convention is crumbling. When it ends up like the Berlin Wall, you will be free to write actively like Sir Isaac Newton: .....having darkened my laboratory, and made a small hole in my window shade, to let in a convenient quantity of the sun’s light, I placed my prism at the entrance, .... 3. Don’t lose your reader at the beginning of a clause A clear, coherent style largely depends on the first few words of your clauses. These words should include a topic, an idea that is explored in the clause. The topic of a clause should not come as a surprise to the reader; it can be a repetition of an earlier topic or an idea that emerged at the end of an earlier clause. The topic should be followed quickly by a precise verb describing action. This approach is followed and explained in the next paragraph. Topics are crucial because, towards the beginning of each clause, they focus the attention of your reader on a particular idea, an idea that is then explored in the clause. If your topics change randomly and refer to new ideas, your reader will feel disorientated at the beginning of each clause; this feeling can be avoided if your topics form a sequence of ideas for which your reader is prepared. In the preceeding paragraph, each clause begins with a familiar topic, shown in boldface, and the topics form an orderly sequence of ideas. The intention was to lead the reader through a coherent set of connected ideas. This approach ensures that sentences can get off to a quick start because topics on familar ideas can be short. In addition, any new idea automatically appears at the end of a sentence, at a place of emphasis! You can assess this value of this approach by comparing the following paragraphs: Physicists and astronomers exploring the nature of black holes have raised some astonishing questions. The sudden collapse of a massive star, in which thermonuclear fusion has ceased, into a point creates a black hole. The com5 pression of matter into a point changes the fabric of space around the point in profoundly puzzling ways. Astonishing questions have been raised by physicists and astronomers about the nature of black holes. A black hole is created when thermonuclear fusion ceases in a massive star and the star suddenly collapses so that all its matter is compressed to a point. This compression causes profound and puzzling changes in the fabric of space. 4. When necessary provide a context for ideas Your sentences should be read within a context of your choosing. This context will often be implicit, particularly if your topics are orderly. When the context needs to be mentioned explicitly, remember it is only helpful to do so near the beginning of a sentence. You may mention a context in order to influence your readers point of view. For example, you can use phrases like occasionally, under certain circumstances, up to a point, from an ethical point of view, experimentally, theoretically, pragmatically etc. You can place your ideas with respect to time or place by using phrases like during the next few years, in the end, up to now, eventually, in newly developing countries, only in Manchester, etc. Most importantly, you may need to set out the logical connection of a sentence relative to the sentence that precedes it. In this case, use transitional words like therefore, however, on the other hand, etc, and use them precisely with the following meanings: Adding: furthermore, moreover, similarly, and, also. Opposing: but, however, though, nevertheless, on the other hand. Concluding: so, therefore, hence, thus, for, as a result, consequently. Exemplifying: for example, for instance, to illustrate. Intensifying: in fact, indeed, even, as a matter of fact. Sequencing: first, second, finally, in conclusion, to sum up. 5. Don’t bury important ideas in long sentences In a sentence you can signal your topic prominently only once, at the beginning, and you can signal emphasis prominently only once, at the end. It follows that important topics and points of emphasis can easily be lost in a long sentence. If this happens consider breaking the sentence up into smaller ones. For example, instead of beginning a new clause with because or since, think about a new sentence beginning with As a result, Consequently or Because of this. Similarly, a new clause beginning with if or provided that can be replaced by a new sentence beginning with If so or If this happens. 6. Ensure that long sentences flow easily A well managed long sentence can be just as clear as several short sentences. Long 6 sentences add variety to your prose and they are essential when you have to develop a set of closely connected ideas. Writing clear long sentences is hard work. Here are two suggestions. When you write a long sentence, do not make your readers hold their breath until they get to the main verb. In other words, do not write: Your readers will, if you write a long sentence in which there are lots of words before the main verb, have to hold their breath. A sentence consisting of string of clauses beginning with that or which can be limp, ambiguous and monotonous. You can avoid this by using a word or a phrase to repeat or sum up a preceding idea. This technique is slightly overworked in the following: The students wrote reports on genetic engineering, renewable energy and space exploration, reports that sparkled with insight and invention. The reports were both relevant and effective, relevant to the needs of the Research Councils and effective in showing that the current research programmes were inadequate. In particular, the report on genetic engineering emphasised that scientists have finally unravelled the mysteries of the human genome, a discovery that may lead to the control of cancer. 7. Don’t misuse metaphors A metaphor can convey briefly and vividly an idea that might overwise need tedious exposition. However, all good metaphors eventually become cliches and attract ridicule. Once upon a time, you could say: leave no stone unturned. You now need something fresher, maybe: ransack every black hole in the universe? But when you use a metaphor check that it conveys the meaning you intend. Senator Dole did not check before he closed the 1996 Presidential Debate by promising the American people that he would deliver a new economic package. Thud! Here is a selection of inappropriate or mixed metaphors: Persons with diarrhoea and vomitting should not be allowed to swamp the medical services. We now have 47 pairs of wellington boots on our hands. In determining the floor-space, a ceiling of 15,000 square feet should be the limit. Major’s speech did not ignite the audience. It was like a fire-side chat. Flexiblity is one of the corner stones of our policy. The recovery of the house-building programme will require action in a number of fields. Anyone making concrete forecasts is liable to come unstuck. This team explored a virgin field, pregnant with possibilities. 8. Unpack compound noun phrases 7 A noun may used as adjective to form a compound noun phrase like student meeting or radio telescope, but a long series of nouns can be ambiguous when a genuine adjective is thrown in. Here are some noun phrases that got out of control: Government methane emission detection kit Water-cooled reactor design staff Radioactive waste disposal staff 9. Don’t rely on the computer to check your spelling Hoards of well-healed Danes are known to suffer from irritable bowl syndrome. The Danish Medical Council has set up a special disciplinary committee to censor formerly doctors who peddle inappropriate remedies for this grizzly condition. This committee will compliment the general medical disciplinary committee. It is hoped that this special committee will not be phased by the criticism that doctors have the rite to act independently. Doctors who breech the guidelines can expect more than a light wrap across the knuckles. RECOMMENDED BOOK The Complete Plain Words Sir Ernest Gowers, HMSO, ISBN 0-11-701121-5 My copy cost £3.95. Buy a copy now. A C Phillips 8 October 2000 The correct spelling of the homophones or near-homophones are: hordes, well-heeled, bowel, formally, censure, pedal, grisly, complement, fazed, right, breach, rap. 9