5 Secrets Steps to Save Your Marriage
Is your relationship at a critical stage? Is your once happy marriage now tainted by suspicion, arguing and
the silent treatment? You don't have to be yet another 50/50 statistic. You can take certain steps to save
your marriage. Let's consider five sure steps to save a marriage that can help even the most tempestuous
Step 1: Be realistic.
This means that you must stop playing games, stop living in denial and acknowledge the reality of what is
happening. You must acknowledge that a troubled marriage is not just one person's fault. The fact that
there is trouble probably points to a number of flaws on both sides. Try to find the reasons for the trouble.
Be honest with yourself. For as many flaws as you find in your partner, you should find two more that you
have. The first step to save your marriage is to acknowledge the obvious and start seeking workable
Step 2: Start calmly communicating with each other.
The next step is to increase your communication. If you tend to argue or blow up when speaking to your
spouse, then aim to non-react. Be calm when you communicate your thoughts. If a certain topic is giving
you apprehension then drop the subject and instead talk about something else, something that's related
to the troubled relationship. Usually troubled relationships are plagued by a number of problems. What
matters is that you want to talk things through with your partner, without judgment, without yelling or
arguing, and without any need to "win" or show up the other person. Start saving your marriage by
Step 3: Find a middle ground.
No marriage will work if one partner sets the guidelines and demands strict adherence from the other.
(This is more like a dictatorship than a marriage) You must be able to compromise. If you are unwilling to
make a 360 degree change then you must at least be willing to meet your partner half way. This makes
for easier negotiations because you are showing your partner that you are willing talk things out and
make sacrifices if it means you can save the marriage.
Step 4: Take it slowly.
Just as with dating, make sure you are mending the relationship patiently and slowly. Take one day at a
time, trying your best to live up to your "middle ground" agreements, and avoiding confrontation or
anything else that irritates your partner. Understand that sometimes taking it slowly means separating for
a while. You might view this as a risk, but a brief separation quickly helps to show a person's true colors.
If there is still love between you, a separation may cause the two of you to miss each other. In any event,
do not pressure your partner to submit to your authority, or try and keep him or her locked away from the
rest of the world. You always treat the person you love with respect and this may mean taking thing
slowly and giving him/her some space.
Step 5: Find a relationship counselor to help.
We have arguments and relationship trouble because we are imperfect human beings, prone to making
errors in judgment. Understanding this is an important step. Once you realize the reality of a situation, the
way you and your spouse have behaved, the next step is to pursue relationship counseling. This can help
you take steps to become a better husband or wife. You are more likely to save the marriage if you get a
professional counselor involved. A counselor can help you to work on becoming a better person and
slowly but surely eliminating the flaws in your personality that your spouse finds unbearable. You don't
have to change who you are; all you really have to change is your method of communication.
If you or your partner really want the save your marriage, you will take these sure steps lovingly and as a
team. There is hope for you...no matter how bad things might seem for the moment.