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The evolution of jeans

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									Title:
The evolution of jeans

Word Count:
824

Summary:
Remember when the only way of speeding up the wearing in process of your
new jeans was to scrape your ass on some rough cement? What? You didn‟t
do that? This article takes us on a strange journey of the jeans
evolution. Bad taste warning!


Keywords:
Jeans, Jeans Levi, Jeans Lee, Jeans Wrangler, blue jeans, denim, cool


Article Body:
Thought of the day: Why is it   acceptable to wear the same pair of jeans
for days, even weeks, without   being questioned by friends? Yet wearing
the same pair of cargos three   days in a row would be scowled upon and
considered un-hygienic. Do we   actually believe jeans are immune to dirt?

Still on the topic of jeans… remember when all we had to choose from was
either a pair of Levis, Lee or Wrangler‟s? And all you had in your
wardrobe was a choice of black stone wash and blue stone wash?

I remember this quite vividly. There was no such thing as „engineered
denim‟ in the early 90‟s when I was a teenager. Yet in the pursuit of
being cool, I had to conjure up my own version of „engineering‟. I got
my worn in look by way of scraping my ass up and down the cement footpath
out the front of my house (I lived on a main road by the way). Later my
mother told me that it would have been a hell of a lot easier to take off
the said pair of jeans and rub them against a rough stone. Thanks for the
advice mum, but too late. If only my nickname „ass scraper‟ wore out as
fast as my jeans did…

Then something revolutionary happened in the mid nineties (that saved my
ass, so to speak). Levis decided that we didn‟t have to wait years and
years to wear in our favourite pair of jeans, „cause America‟s convicted
criminals could do all the hard work for us! Yep, all those second hand
Levis being sold in boutiques actually came from America‟s prisons.
Imagine the satisfaction for the prisoner, knowing that some good came
out of their existence? As long as they served their full sentence, of
course (jeans just didn‟t achieve an optimum level of worn in-ness if
prisoners got out early on parole). So my pre-worn Levis alla „break and
enterer‟ became the „hottest‟ thing in my wardrobe (just kidding, I paid
for them). Really, how could I have been so narrow minded as to think
crime didn‟t pay?

Moving into the new millennium, jean manufactures suddenly realised that
it was wrong to allow such an obvious exploitation of America‟s
prisoners. Especially when the Chinese could do it for a whole lot less,
and quicker too! Engineered denim was born. All of sudden, we didn‟t
have to wait years for our jeans to hit the perfect level of worn in-
ness, because we could buy a brand new pair of „pseudo old‟ that looked
like, well, a bad pair of new jeans. Like anything in its infancy, there
is always something NQR (Not Quite Right) about it. Kinda like when CGI
special effects first started to appear in film. Much to the rile of
everyone around me, I just couldn‟t help the comment “Aw that looks so
fake!” every time a dinosaur ripped apart a person, or when a ship
collided with an iceberg in the middle of the Antarctic. It was just a
natural reaction to something that looked completely unnatural when
trying to appear natural (also my natural reaction when I see a man with
hair plugs, or a woman with a bad boob job. But that‟s another blog entry
all together). And while I didn‟t go around pointing at people wearing
badly engineered jeans on the street (only because I too was a serious
offender), I did wonder when the edges of pockets were going to be
grinded evenly, rather then looking like they had been attacked by cat
claws.

Today however, while we are finally perfecting pocket grinding, crotch
whisker marks, and thigh and ass sand blasting, isn‟t this all merely an
improvement on the fake worn-in look? I mean, I have a pair of jeans that
I bought almost four years ago in dark indigo denim with only a basic
enzyme wash. Over the years of wearing, there has not been even the
slightest beginnings of fraying along any pocket; the whisker mark around
the crotch goes straight across the thigh, (not splayed out in all kinds
of unsightly directions drawing attention to my bathing suit area); and
my ass does not look likes it‟s been dragged over coloured sand! Perhaps
we have forgotten what a real pair of worn in jeans looks like?

In saying this, I‟m certainly not against engineered denim. It‟s
interesting and it‟s getting better. And while the „new pseudo old‟ look
has now become my daily bread, the „engineered‟ price tag that comes with
the jeans is nauseating. „Authentic‟ looking old jeans will set you back
around $350 (AUD) these days. Common! For me to even want to pay that
kind of money, I‟m hoping some Chinese worker is scraping their ass up
and down the factory room floor for me.

								
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