BULLY PREVENTION AND
Overview: Bullying CAN Be Stopped!
Boulton has adopted the most effective Bully prevention program available:
The Olweus Bully Prevention Program.
It complements and supports Peacebuilder Behavior Management.
Dr. Olweus' research indicates that
the three most effective deterrants to bullying are:
#1 INCREASED SUPERVISION
#2 EMPOWER BYSTANDERS TO HELP THE VICTIM
#3 EMPOWERING THE VICTIMS
Parents! We need your support in all three of these areas.
#1 Increased Supervision
Adult Supervision is
the Best Prevention
. . . And the Best
Bullies rarely bully in full view of an authority figure.
What You Can Do:
• Make sure your children are well supervised before and after
• Support the school in their efforts to increase supervision as the
children arrive and leave school.
• Sign up to help increase supervision during lunch recess. This only
needs to be once or twice a year. Sign up at back to school night, parent teacher
conferences, or anytime! Just call or stop by the office to sign up.
• Lunch Recess Supervision: When your day arrives, check in at the office first thing. You can
wear a safety vest so children will recognize you . . . or simply wear the paper volunteer badge.
Lunch recess goes from approximately 11:30 - 1:00 p.m. but you do not need to come for the
entire time. Come for as much time as you can, we appreciate any help you can give us.
All you need to do is walk around the playground where the playground duties have a hard time
supervising: up on the hill, behind the portables, on the front and side of the buildings, make a
sweep through the buildings to make sure children are not hanging out in the bathrooms or halls,
and feel free to spend some time playing a game with your child and their friends if you wish. If you
come across a child who is hurt, or students who are arguing or fighting, you do not need to
handle it . Simply take the involved students to the duties, or inform a duty to come to the child or
children. And THANK YOU!!
#2 Empower Bystanders to Help the Victims!
Bystanders are Not Neutral!!
•But if they speak
• If they do up and lend a
not Their weight decides
helping hand to
intervene, who has the power!
they lend the victims, the
power to the scales will easily
bully through tip in favor of
their silence! eliminating
What You Can Do!
Encourage your children to speak up and help
the victim. It is a myth that anyone can be witness
to bullying behavior and say they "didn't do
anything!" If they did nothing . . . they just told the Reward your children for helping
bully and the victim that the behavior they saw was the victims: Praise them. Let them hear
o.k. by them, or not a big enough deal to say you telling others about how proud you
were of them when they stood up for the
It is EXTREMELY important that our bystanders not victim.
only speak up, but that they actively help the victim:
Hey! That’s not Support the school if your child
funny! C’mon Bill occasionally receives consequences for
and Nancy, let’s not intervening! This is a new policy. It will help
us discourage the children from being complacent. It
take John and play will make a phenomenal difference in motivating the
over near the duty! bystanders to step in and help, as well as
discouraging the bully!
“Bullying Back” is not an option!
Teach your children how they can help the victim without bullying back:
They can tell the bully to stop.
They can step between the bully and the victim.
They can take the victim away to play somewhere else and do something else.
They can invite the victim to be their friend and include them in subsequent
They can go with the victim to report to a duty.
They can report to the duty themselves.
They can help ask other bystanders to help.
They can help the victim obtain and fill out a bully report.
#3 Empowering Victims
You can Help Your
Just say no to feeling
Children: Just say no to
inferior! tattling-Use honest
Just say no to
Just say no to
Just say no to
caring about what
the bully thinks!
Why “Bullying Back” does not
• Bullying back might stop the bully from bothering one or two
children. But more often than not, it just enrages the bully and
causes him to increase his “power” through more aggressive means,
or through increased numbers.
• Bullies are good at picking children who they know can't or won't
• If a child bullies back, it is no longer a bullying problem, it is
simply a fight. The adults cannot determine or know who was at fault
to begin with and your child will be punished right along with the
bully. Even if they are an equal match to the bully, physically and/or
emotionally, this is very discouraging to children and adds to their
sense of helplessness.
• (IMPORTANT NOTE: Remember “Safe School" violations must be
reported immediately-do not have your child put it on the bully report
and wait. Report first . . . and add it to their bully report later!)
SAFE SCHOOL VIOLATIONS:
• No real or pretend weapons.
• No drugs, tobacco or alcohol.
• No fighting, harassment or
• No disruptive behavior in a
classroom or school activity.
The Definition of Bullying:
• 1. The bullying
behavior has gone on
• 2. There is an
imbalance of power in
favor of the bully.
Reporting Empowers Victims
What you can do and Why:
• Help your child keep a record of the bully’s behavior.. Keeping a record is the
best way to prove that 1. the bullying behavior has gone on over a period of time. It
also is a great way to show that 2. your child has not “bullied back.” If your child is
not fighting back, and the bully is still aggressive (whether physical or relationally that
also proves there is an imbalance of power.
You can use the report provided in the link--but it does not have to be that fancy.
Help your child list dates and behaviors. Younger children can simply put tally marks
on a calendar . . . Even kindergartners know how to do that! It is not hard, but it
does take effort and patience and the children NEED our HELP!
• Teach your child the difference between Tattling and Reporting:
Tattling is a ploy to get attention and is actually a form of bullying. It is not based on
honestly reporting what is going on. But reporting is based on honesty and on caring
about what is best for everyone: the victim, the bully, and the entire atmosphere in
• Reward your child for properly reporting bullying behavior! Children who
properly report need to be supported and rewarded! Typically there is no
reinforcement for telling . . . Teachers, duties, and parents are overwhelmed with
countless “verbal” reports everyday. Children sense their annoyance. We cannnot
make a change if we do not all work together to make the rewards for reporting much
bigger than not reporting . . . Or than the negative reinforcers that come from tattling.
Paper is Power
Keeping a record is very effective.
It accomplishes a number of things:
• 1-It eliminates the attention kids get from tattling.
• 2-It shows the victim-and the adults- exactly what is happening. Children are
naturally prone to distorted thinking. If the victim is minimizing, it will help
them know they need help. If the victim is exaggerating, it will help them see
how things really are.
• 3-Knowing they have a plan and can get the help they need is often times all
children need to feel empowered. Bullies can sense when a child will not put
up with their abuse.
• 4-It eliminates the need to fight or bully back. Children will begin to learn that
they will be heard and supported.
• 5-It makes it possible for adults to properly punish the bullies and get them
the serious help and interventions that they need.
Using Power Behaviors empowers Victims!
What you can do:
Encourage your child to use power behaviors!
Make a checklist of power behaviors they have tried.
Help your child practice using them!
Using power behaviors can put a stop to the bullying
and prevent your child from being victimized in the future.
Wouldn’t that be nice?
• #1 Change Your Attitude ________
• Quit caring about what other people think ___
• Be confident and brave ________
• Look up not down ________
• Use a loud voice (shout if you need to so others can hear you and will see what is
going on) ___
• Use I statements: I don’t like it when you say you are my friend and then won’t let me
play. It makes me feel left out. I want you to tell the truth.) ________
• Call the bully by his/her name _______
• #2 Change the Balance of Power ________
• Don’t play alone________
• Play near the duty ________
• Ask bystanders for help ________
• Seek a wise person ________
• Who did you talk to? __________________
• #3 Change Your Response ________
• Try being nice
• Ignore. How many days? ________
• Avoid. How many days? ________
• Play with someone else ________
• Play something else ________
• Play somewhere else ________
• Other things I have tried: ___________________
• #4 Report. ________
Once the Victim Has Done His/Her Part . . .
We Must Support Them!
• By properly reporting and not bullying back, the
victims have done the bully and the entire school
and neighborhood a HUGE favor. They are true
heroes and peacebuilders!
• Now the true bullies can be properly identified
and soundly punished. Remember, a true bully
is in serious need of quick interventions . . . It is
their future that is most at risk.
Boulton’s Policy for Bullying
• First offense: Teacher intervention, including a student letter of apology or
treaty. A written plan of action needs to be written for bullying.
• 2nd offense: Child is sent to another classroom/plan is revised as needed.
The parent is called.
• 3rd offense: Teacher will write up a Behavior Referral and send the child to
the office. The administration will review the plan, call the parent or hold a
parent meeting .
• 4th offense: Out of school suspension. This will either be at-home or
between schools, depending on the principal’s discretion.
• REMEMBER: Safe school Violations need to come directly to the office
with a Behavioral Referral.
What you can do if your child receives negative
consequences for bullying:
• Be involved in the decision making
• Support the decisions.
• Follow up with negative consequences at
home. (Be careful, usually when a child is involved in bullying, they
find negative consequences rewarding! Yelling, spanking, threatening, etc.
not only do not work in the long run, they are often rewarding to a bully.
They can also turn abusive if you do it over time! Work together with the
school to find consequences that feel punishing to your child, but are also
not abusive. Usually, a complete lack of attention works the best.
Increased chores are also great.)
• Follow negative consequences with positive statements expressing
your faith in the child’s true good nature and ability to change.
• Children . . . even bullies . . . actually want to be good. It is up to us
as parents and educators to provide them with strong enough
POSITIVE REINFORCEMENTS for good behavior and strong
enough NEGATIVE REINFORCEMENTS for bad behavior to make
it easy for them to BE GOOD!
• “It is also most important to constantly give children a chance to try
again. It allows them to feel that they still have a chance and
indicates your faith in the child and his ability to learn.” –Rudolf
• Working together . . . We can put a stop to
bullying and provide ALL the children with
the best possible atmosphere for learning!