40 Improving Household Advice Prolegomena Praise be to Allah, we praise, seeking help. We take refuge in Allah from the evil of our passions and evil deeds of our actions. Whoever ditunjuki by God then nothing can be misleading, and whoever is led astray by God then no one can. I bear witness that none has the right to be worshiped except Allah who has no partner for Him, and I testify that Muhammad is His true slave and messenger of God. It is delicious house Allah says: "And verily, Allah makes you your houses as a residence." (An-Nahl: 80) Ibn Kathir rahimahullah said: "Allaah mentions delicious perfection of His servants, with what He made for their homes which is where they live. They come back to him, take cover and use it with various kinds of benefits "1. Lots of house for one's usefulness. He is a place to eat, sleep, rest, and gathered with family, wife and children, also the place to do activities that most personal of each family member. He said: "And be ye remain in your house and do not be decorated and behave like ignorant people who once were. (Al- Ahzab: 33) If we consider the situation of people who do not own a house, ie the people who live in exile, in a porch-patio path and displaced refugees in the camp- the camp while, we certainly understand the true pleasure of existing at home. Certainly we will hear the explosions and such emotion he said: "I have no permanent residence, sometimes I sleep in the house of the So and so, sometimes in the coffee shop, garden or on the beach, my closet is in the car." Thus we shall keberserakan understand the meaning because it has no residence or home. When God punish the Jews of Bani Nadhir, God taking pleasure from their house, God expelled them from their homes. He said: "It was he who issued the unbelievers among the People of the Book of the villages at the time of the expulsion first time." (Al-Hasyr: 2) Then the word: "They destroy their houses with their own hands and the hands of people believers. Then you shall take (the incident) for a lesson, O men who have a view. " (Al-Hasyr: 2) Noting that Encourage A Muslim reconciliation (Repair) house • Keep yourself and your family from fire Fire and survivors of a fiery doom. He said: "O ye who believe, guard yourselves and your family from fire of Hell which the fuel is men and stones, angels guard the rough, tough, who do not disobey Allah in what he commanded them and always do what is commanded. "(At-Tahrim: 6) • The amount charged to the responsibility of the leader of the house in front God on the day of reckoning. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Verily, Allah Ta'ala will ask for accountability to each leader for what he leads, whether he keeps his leadership or melalaikannya, so that a man asked about his family members". Hadeeth Hasan, narrated by An-Nasa'i in Isyratun Nisaa ', Hadith No. 292 and from Anas Ibn Hibbaan in Saheeh al-Jami', no.1775; As Ash-or higher-lineage no.1636. Home is the place to keep themselves and the safety of various crimes and other human refuse from danger; home is a refuge in times of fitnah. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Fortunately for those who master the spoken and roomy house, and wept over his guilt." Hadeeth Hasan, narrated by Ath- Thabrani in Al- Mu'jamul Ausath of Tsauban and contained in Saheeh al-Jami ', no.3824. And he said: "Five things that anyone working on one of it then he will get a guarantee from God. That is: people who visit the sick, people who go to war, or people who go to their leaders for the purpose of reprimand or remind her, or she sat in her house so that those who survived (ganggguan) it and he survived the (interference) them. Hadith narrated Ahmad (5 / 241) "Safety in the defamation of a person he continuously inhabited house." Hasan hadith, narrated by Ad-Dailami in Firdaus Musnadul from Abu Musa; contained in Saheeh al-jami 'no.3543, and the wording in the Sunan of Ibn Abi' Asim, no.1021. In takhrij he said: "This hadeeth saheeh". Muslims will feel the benefits of this when he was in a state of alienation, when he can not change the existing kemungkaran- kemungkaran, then he has a place of refuge when returning to his home. The house will keep himself from the actions and views that are prohibited, keep his wife from tabarruj (showing off beauty and ornaments) and keep her children from evil friends. • In fact most humans to use his time in the house, especially in the summer and the stinging cold, during the rainy season, the beginning and end of the day, when finished from work or school, because these times should be used in obedience, if not necessarily going out to do things that are prohibited. • It is important, that the attention of the house is the greatest tool to build the Muslim society. Because a society is composed of the houses. The houses are basic elements of a society. The houses that form a village and township-village that is the community. If the basic elements of good, our society will undoubtedly stronger with God's laws, strong in the face of the enemies of God, radiates goodness and do not cause crime. From an Islamic house will be born-sustaining support for community improvements, such preachers-preacher example, student of knowledge, a real mujahid, Shalihah wife, mother of educators from other elements of good builders. If such an important problem, while our homes are full of kemungkaran and neglect, belittle and exceeds the limit, then the big question mark arises here: Does Means-Means To Improve Houses? To the readers, writers suguhkan answers, advice in this matter, I hope God gives benefits to us with it, and hopefully the spirit of God directs the sons and daughters of Islam to bring the message of (task) from the early Islamic home improvement. This advice is meant for two things, get serious benefits (good) ie by amar ma'ruf or prevent damage that is eliminating. Hopefully useful. Household Building Advice (1): Choosing the Right Wife Allah says: "And people who alone among you, and those worthy (married) and servants sahayamu that men and servants of the women sahayamu . If they are poor, God will enable them with grace. And Allah Area (grace), the Knower. " (An-Nur: 32). Should someone choose wife Shalihah with the terms as follows: "Wania was married for four things: wealth, descendants, her beauty and her religion. Then you should prioritize women who have a religion, (if not) necessarily be a dusty second hand (poor, miserable ) ". Hadith narrated by al- Bukhaari, see Fath Bari, 9 / 132. "The world everything is fun, and the best pleasures of the world are women Shalihah''. Hadith narrated by Muslim (1468), cet. Abdul Baqi, and a history of An-Nasa'i from Ibn Amr, Saheeh al-Jami ', hadeeth no.3407" Let any one of you have a thankful heart, which is always verbal dhikr and faithful wife who helped him in matters of the afterlife ". hadeeth narrated Ahmad (5 / 282), At-Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah from Tsauban, Saheeh al- Jami ', hadeeth no. 5231 In another narration: "And the wife Shalihah the help of world issues and your religion is the best (wealth) which kept man". hadeeth narrated by al-Bayhaqi in Ash-Syu'ab from Abu Umaamah. See Saheeh al-Jami ', hadeeth no . 4285 "Marry women who are loving and fertile peranakannya. Indeed I am proud to number you among the prophets on the Day of Judgement. "Hadith narrated by Imam Ahmad (3 / 245), from Anas. It says in Irwa 'ul Ghalil," This hadeeth is saheeh ", 6 / 195" (Nikahilah) girl girls, they are actually more offspring, more sweetly spoken and more accepting with little (qana'ah) ". hadeeth narrated Ibn Majah, No. 1861 and the nature of As-Genealogy Ash-or higher, hadith no. 623 In another narration : "Fewer their tricks." t As Shalihah woman is one of four causes of happiness, the woman who is not otherwise Shalihah is one of four causes of misery. As mentioned in saheeh hadeeth: "And of happiness is Shalihah woman, you look at him then you were fascinated with it, and you go from it but you feel safe with him and your treasure. And of the misery is the woman that if you look at him you feel reluctant, then he reveals dirty words to you, and if you go from it you do not feel safe for him and treasure "Hadith narrated Ibn Hibbaan and others, in Ash-As-pedigree or higher, hadith no. 282 In contrast, need to consider carefully the circumstances of people who propose these Muslim women, a new grant it after fulfilling the requirements as follows: "If you come to someone who was willing to morals and religion then nikahkanlah, if you do not necessarily going to happen on earth slander and great mischief. " Ibn Majah narrated Hadith, 1967, in Ash-As-pedigree or higher, hadith no. 1022 The things above need to be done by for example asking, do research, seek information and credible news sources so as not to damage and destroy the household concerned. "Righteous man with a woman Shalihah be able to build a good house, because A good domestic crop will come out with the permission of their Lord, being a poor country will not be out of plants therefrom except with difficulty. Advice (2): Efforts to Establish (Fix) Wife. If the wife is a woman Shalihah then this is the pleasure and great gift from Allah Ta 'ala. If not so, then head of the household obligations is to strive for improvement. This can happen because of some circumstances. For example, from the beginning she was married to a woman who did not have a religion, because the man was, indeed ignore religious matters. Or he married a woman in hopes of someday he could fix it, or because of family pressure. In these circumstances he should really try to fully so they can make improvements. They also must understand and appreciate the true, that the issue guidance (guidance) is the right God. It is Allah who repair. And among the gift of God for His servant Zakariya is as spoken: "And We fixed his wife". (Al-Anbiya ': 90). The repair was either in the form of physical improvements as well as religion. Ibn Abbas said: : "Formerly, the wife of the Prophet Zachariah was barren, unable to give birth so God can make delivery." Ata 'said: Previously, he was a long tongue, then God fix it ". Some Improved Methods Wife: Observing and straighten out various kinds of worship to Allaah. Criticism on this issue in subsequent discussions. Efforts to increase his faith, for example: • advise it woke up the night to pray Tahajjud • Read Al Qur'anul Karim. • reciting dhikr and prayer at a certain time and opportunity. • advised her to do a lot of charity. • Reading Islamic books useful. • Hearing the tape recordings that are useful, both in a matter of faith as well as scientific and continues to pursue additional similar cassette collection. • pick out female friends Shalihah ukhuwah him so they can establish a strong, exchanging ideas on matters of religion as well as visiting each other for a good purpose. • away from all the ugliness and the doors. For example, by keeping her from the aspect of faith At Home Advice (3): Make the house as a place Dzikrullah (Remembrance of Allah) Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam said: "The parable of the house in which there is recollection of God, and a house with no recollection of God in it is (like) imagery between living with the dead ". Hadith narrated by Muslim and Abu Musa 1 / 539, cet. Abdul Baqi Therefore, the home must serve as a place to do various kinds of dhikr, whether it is dhikr in the heart as well as by oral, prayer, or read the blessings and the Qur'an, or study the religious sciences, or read other books useful. Currently, how many of the homes of Muslims who die because there is no recollection of God in it, as indicated by the above hadith. And how much more when the chant in the house are poems and songs devil, gossip, lie and provoke them? How much more if the houses were filled with disobedience of kemungkaran, like ikhtilath (higgledy-piggledy with the opposite sex) is forbidden, tabarruj (show off the beauty and jewelry) among relatives of non-mahram or to the neighbors who come into the house? How could an angel will enter the house with such circumstances? Therefore Revive your home with the recollection of God! Hopefully God merahmatimu. Advice (4): Make Your house as Qiblah. That is, make the house as a place of worship. He said: "And We inspired Moses and his brother:" Take some fruits ye both houses in Egypt for a home for yourselves and teach your people and your houses and establish it as a mecca for prayer and gembirakanlah those who believe. "(Yunus: 87). Ibn Abbas said: "I mean told to make their homes as the mecca that is, they were ordered to make the houses as the mosques (places of worship)". Ibn Katheer said: "It is as if - And Allaah knows best - when torture and pressure of the Pharaoh and his people became increasingly upon them, then they are told to multiply prayers, as the word of Allah, the Exalted: "O those who believe, and teach patience and prayers as penolongmu". (Al-Baqarah : 153). In the hadith: "When the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam face a difficulty, then he prayed." Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 4 / 224. This underscores the importance of worship in homes, especially in times of weak and oppressed, as well as on several occasions when Muslims are not able to show their prayers in front of the infidels. In this case we also need to think back to the mihrab of Mary, namely a place of worship he is, as mentioned in the word of Allah, the Exalted: "Every Zakaria signed to meet Mary at Mihrab he found the food at his side." (Ali Imran: 37) The Companions are also very concerned about prayer in their homes in addition to prayer fardhu. An interesting story below as a lesson for us: "From Mahmud bin Ar-Rabi 'Al-Ansari, that Itban bin Malik - he was one of the Companions of the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam participated in the battle of Badr, from the Ansar - he came to the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam and said: "O Prophet!, my eyes have been deceived but I still pray with my people, if it rains, water flows in the valley (which separates) between me and them so that I (not) to come to their mosques and praying together, I really want to Messenger of Allah, if you come to me and pray in my house so I make it as mushalla (place of prayer) ". He said:" The Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam said to him: "I'll do Insha Allah" . "Itban said:" So the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam and Abu Bakr when daylight (visible) rises, then the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam ask for permission, then I'm allowed to him, he does not sit before it entered the house and then he said: "In what part you like me to pray from your house? " . "He said:" So I show him a way from my house, then the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam bertakbir stood then, then we all stand in a row, and the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam then pray two rak greetings ". In draw a lesson from the above hadith , Ibn Hajar said: "There is a lesson, so we use a specific place to perform prayers in the house. The prohibition to make a particular place in the mosque is the hadeeth of Abu Daud, and that if he did for riya 'or similar. Making a particular place in the house to pray that does not mean to make this place as a waqf - waqf law does not apply to him - although generally categorized by the name of the mosque. Advice (5): Faith Education for Family Members. From Ayesha radhiallahu anha who said: One time Rasullah sallallaahu alaihi wasalam, the prayer of the night, when it will be Witr he remarks: "Arise, and be steadfast in prayer Witr O Ayesha!". "God loves a man who woke up last night and then pray to wake his wife so that prayer, if you do not want him to sprinkle his face with water". Hadith narrated by Muslim, Sahih Muslim bi Syarh An- Nawawi, 6 / 23 Familiarize and encouraged his wife to charity is something that could add to the faith, he is a great case that is recommended by the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam with his saying: "O all women, you bersedekahlah . Indeed I see that you guys are as many-many residents of Hell ". Hadith narrated Ahmad and Abu Daud; Saheeh al-jami ', hadeeth no.3488 Among a good idea is to put a charity box in the house for poor people, so any money coming in it be right for those who need it, because that's where their money in the house of the Muslims. If family members see a role model who used fasting on ayyaamul biidh (mid Qamariyah every month, namely on 13, 14, 15), on Monday and Thursday, the day of Ashura, the day of Arafah, on many days in the month of Muharram and Sha'ban, undoubtedly will encourage other family members to follow. Advice (6): Attention to prayer-prayer in Disyari'atkan and Sunnah-Sunnah Relating to Home. Among the examples are: Benediction of the house: in Shahihnya Imam Muslim narrates that the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "If a man into her house and then mention the name of Allaah when he enters and when eating, Satan said: "You do not have the (quota) of the bed and not too (rations) to eat here". And when he came in and did not mention the name of God when he enters, he said: "You get the (quota) bed." And if it does not mention the name of God when eating, he said: "You got (rations) a place to sleep and eat". " Hadith narrated by Imam Ahmad, Al-Musnad, 3 / 346 and Muslim, 3 / 1599 Benediction out of the house: In Sunan, Abu Dawood narrated that the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "If a man leaves his house and then say : "Bismillaahi Tawakkaltu 'Laa alallaahi hawla walaa quwwata illaa billaahi" "With the Name of Allah, I bertawakkal (cleave) to Allah, there is no power and strength except with Allah's help," will undoubtedly be said to him: "Suffice it thee, thou hast given instructions, you have fulfilled and maintained, "so the devil to get away from it. Then another devil said to him:" How can you (tease) man who has ditunjuki, satisfied and maintained? "." Hadith narrated by Abu Daud no. 5095, At-Tirmidhi no. 3426. In Saheeh al-Jami ', hadith no. 499. Siwak: In Shahihnya, Imam Muslim narrated from Aisha radhiyallah 'anha, that she said: "That the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam when he entered his house to start with Miswak". Sahih Muslim, book of Ath-Thaharah, chapter 15, no. 44. Advice (7): Routine read Surat Al-Baqarah in the house to rid of Satan. The hadiths in this regard include: the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Do not make your homes as graves! Verily demons ran away from home which was read in which surah Al-Baqarah." Saheeh Muslim, cet.Abdul Baqi, 1 / 539 the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Read the letter Al-Baqarah in your homes, because the real devil is not go into a public house in which Surat al-Baqarah." Hadith narrated by al-Hakim in al-Mustadrak, 1 / 561, and in Saheeh al-Jami ', hadeeth no.1170 About primacy of the last two verses of surat Al-Baqarah and the influence of reading for the home, the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam said: " Verily Allah the Exalted write a book before He created the heavens and the earth around 2000 years, he is above the Throne, and the lower two-paragraph cover (final) from surat Al- Baqarah. And it is not Satan approached the house that was read in it the second verse is for three nights ". Hadith narrated by Imam Ahmad in the As-Sunnah 4 / 274 and in others; in Saheeh al-Jami 'hadith no. 1799 Religious Studies Residential Advice (8): Teaching Teaching family members is an obligation that must be done by the family leader, as the realization of the command of Allah the Exalted: "O those who believe, keep yourself and your family from the fuel the fire of Hell which men and stones." (At-Tahrim: 6 ) The above verse is the basis for teaching and education of family members, govern them with kindness and prevent them from kemungkaran. Below are some comments the commentators on the verse, which is related to the obligations imposed on the family leader. Qatadah said: "He must reign they do obey Allaah and to prevent them from sin to Him, should keep them to do what is commanded by God and helping them in it. So when you see disobedience, should you keep them away from it and warned not to do ". Adh-Dhahhak and Muqatil said:" It is the duty of every Muslim, taught his family of relatives and servants sahayanya of what is required by God for them and what he forbids ". Ali radhiyallah 'anhu said:" Teach and educate them.'' Al-Kiya At-Tabari said: "We should teach children and our families in religion and goodness, and what is important and necessary in matters of manners and morals". When the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam has advised us to teach the women that is not a slave-free, then how much more the case with your children and your family are independent? "Imam Bukhari in Shahihnya, Chapter Teaching Men to slave Women and Their Families, written word: "Three people who received two rewards: ... and a man who has a female slave and she educated him well, taught well, then he memerdekakannya then marry the two rewards for him. "In the explanation of the above hadith, Ibn Hajar said:" Compliance with tarjamah hadith - that is the title of chapter - the problem of slave women is with texts, and the family problems with qiyas, for attention with an independent family in teaching about the obligations imposed by Allah and His Apostle sunnah-sunnah is something that must and surely than attention to the female slave ". Because of the busyness and duties as well as other bond, a person sometimes neglect to take time for themselves so they can teach their families. Among the road in solving this issue is should he specialize one day a week as a time for family, even possibly involving other relatives to hold a council of science in the home. He should announce that day to all family members and recommend to conform and come on the designated day, will be even more effective by using words to come, either to himself or to other family members. Here is what happened to the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam in this matter. Imam Bukhari said: "Chapter: Are for Women Offered Special Day for Science?" Then cite the hadith of Abu Said Al- Khudri radhiyallah 'anhu: "The woman said to the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam:" We have defeated the men in the submissive to you. Because it make for us one day from you ", then the Messenger of Allah promised them one day to meet with them, the Prophet advised and ordered them". Ibn Hajar said: "In the history of Sahl ibn Abi Salih from his father from Abu Hurayra similar to this story, he said;" Agreement Fulanah you at home, then the Messenger of Allah came to them and gave a talk to them ". From the above hadith we can conclude the importance of teaching the women in their homes, and also reminded how great the attention of female companions in learning problems, also showed that the concentrated spirit taught only to men, leaving women is a big omission for the preachers and leaders of the household . Some readers may say, for example, we have taken the time one day a week and we preach it to family members, then what would we give in the meeting (Majlis) is? And how also to start? In answer to these questions, author try to give an idea in this case so that it becomes manhaj (program) is simple to teach family members in general and for women in particular. • Tafsir Al-Allamah Ibn Sa'di, namely Taisirul Karim Tafseer Al- Rahman fi Tafsiiri Kalaamil Mannaan. Consisting of seven volumes, and bahasannya easy dish. Tafseer can be reviewed and he could read a letter or in any meetings. • Riyaadhus Shaalihiin with comments and captions as well as lessons learned from each hadith. In this case could refer to the book Nuzhat Muttaqiin. • Husnul Uswah Bimaa Tsabata Anillaahi Waraasuulihi Niswah Fin, Siddiq Hasan Khan's work. It is also important to teach the women some legal issues Fiqh, such as purification of law, menstruation, the law of prayer and almsgiving, fasting and pilgrimage, if they have been able to do so. Similarly the food law and beverages, clothing and jewelry, sunnah-sunnah fithrah and the mahram, legal songs, pictures and so on. Among the important references in the problems of the fatwas of the scholars such as collection Edicts Sheikh Abdul Aziz bin Baz, Shaykh Muhammad bin Salih Al-Uthaymeen and other scholars in addition to them, whether it be books or cassette tape. Included in the category of women and family teaching schedule is to remind them to follow a variety of public lectures delivered by the clergy, or a trusted student of knowledge in their fields , if it is possible. This is to give more references and teaching resources, as well as for variation. Also, do not also forget to listen to the broadcast problem Qur'anul Karim Al-reading and paying attention to him. Included in the provision of teaching facilities are reminded family members on a particular day for the women attending the exhibition of Islamic books, but with due regard to the terms of traveling which has been set religion. Advice (9): Create a Library in Your house. Among those who helped the teaching process for families is the provision of religious learning opportunities and help them to comply with Shari'ah laws by creating an Islamic library at home, not necessarily large, but which is important to select the books is important, placing it in a place that's easy to be taken , and encourage family members to read it. Should be in the space provided in the rooms clean and orderly manner, suitable to put the books, in the bedroom, also in the living room, giving the opportunity for family members read books regularly. Among the library of good and efficient - and indeed Allah loves the good and efficient - is that the library should contain the sources thereof can be found discussing and solving various problems, useful for children in school, and should also contain the books for varying degrees, also the books suitable for adults and children, men and women. If able, can also be provided special books gifts for guests and friends of children and family visitors, taking about an interesting prints, books that have been researched and edited, and the hadith-haditsnya have been examined and explained clearly. To set up home library, if necessary by making use of the exhibition of books after a request for consideration prior to the person skilled in the art for Book. Among those who helped make it easier to find books is by ordering the books according to titles. For example, a book on the shelf a separate commentary, as well as hadith, fiqh, and so on. One family member should have a set list of books in accordance with the alphabet and the title, so that will make books, because sometimes many people who love to read Islamic books ask the names of these books at home library. Below are some suggestions on issues important books for home libraries: • Tafsir: Tafsir Ibn Kathir, Tafseer Ibn Sa'di, Zubdatut Tafsir Al-Asyqar work, Ushulut Tafseer of Ibn Uthaymeen, and Lamahaat FII Uluumil Koran works Muhammad Ash-Shabbagh. • Hadith: Saheeh Kalimith Thayyib, Amalul Muslimi fil Yaum wal Lailah, Riyadhush Righteous and testimony, Nuzhat Muttaqin, Mukhtasar Saheeh Al-Bukhari's work Zubaidi, Mukhtasar Mundziri work Saheeh Muslim and Al-Albani, Saheeh al- Jami 'Ash-Shaghier, Dha'iful Jami 'Ash-Shaghier, Shahihut Targhib wat Tarhib, As-Sunnah wa Makaanatuha Tasyrii fit', Minal Arba'in Fawa'id qawa'id wa al- Sultan Nawawiyyah Nazhim work. • Aqidah: Fath Majid Syarhu KitabAt with tahqiq Arna'uth-Tawhid, al-Sunnah A'laamus Mansyurah by Al Hakamy, Ma'arijul Qabuul by Al-Hakamy, Ath-Aqidah Syarhul Thahawiyah with tahqiq Al-Albani, Omar works Silsilatul Aqidah Sulaiman Al-Asyqar (8] uz), Asyraatus Saa'ah Dr.Yusuf Al-Wabil work. • Fiqh: Manaarus Sabil of Ibn Dhauyan, Irwaa'ul Ghalil by Al-Albani, Zaadul Ma'aad, Al-Mughni works of Ibn Qudama, Fiqhus Sunnah, Al-Salih Mulakhkhashul Fiqhi work Fauzan, Majmu'atu Fataawa al- Ulama (Abdul Aziz ibn Baaz, Muhammad bin Salih Al-Uthaymeen, Abdullah bin Jibrin), Shifatu Shalatin Prophet by Al-Albani and Sheikh Abdul Aziz ibn Baaz, Mukhtasar Ahkamil Jana'iz by Al-Albani. • Akhlaq and Sanctification of Life: Tahdzibu Madarijis Salikin, Al-Fawa'id, Al- Jawabul Kaafi, Thariqul Hijratain Baabus Sa'adatain Wa, Wa Al-Wabilush Shayyib Rafi'ul Kalimith Thayyib works Ibn al-Qayyim, Lathaa'iful Ma'aarif work Ibn Rajab, Tahdzibu Mau'idhatil Faithful, Ghidza'ul Albab. • History and Biography: Al-Bidayah Wan Nihayah of Ibn Katheer, ash-Syamaa'il Mukhtasar Al mubammadiyya work of At-Turmudzi, Ar-Rahiiqul Makhtum, Al-'minal Awaashim work of Ibn al-Arabi Qawaashim tahqiq Al-Khatib and Al-Istanbuli, Al-mujtama 'al-Madani (1-2) by Akram Al-Umari, Siyaru A'laamin Nubala', Manhaju Kitaabit chronicle of Al-lslami by Muhammad ibn Shamil As-Salami. In addition, there are many more books in other fields. For example, the books work Mujaddid Imam ash-Shaykh Muhammad ibn Abdul Wahhab, the books by Al- Allamah Ash-Shaykh Abdurrahman ibn Nasir As-Sa'di. Also the books of Omar bin Sulaiman Al-Asyqar, Sheikh Muhammad bin Ahmad bin Ismail Al- Muqaddam, Ustadz Muhammad Muhammad Hussein, Sheikh Muhammad bin Jamil Zainu, Ustad Hussain Uwaisyah in Raqa'iq, ul Iman by Muhammad Na'im Yasin, Al -Wala 'wal Bara' by Shaykh Muhammad Said al-Qahthani, Al-Al- Aqadiyah Inhiraafaat fil-Thani Qarnain Ats 'Asr' Asr work wats Tsalits Ali Az- Zahrani, Al-Moslem Wa An-Nafsiyah Dhahiratul Hazimah Abdullah Ash- Syabanah work, Al-mar'ah Bainal Fiqhi Wal Qaanun work As-Siba'i Mustafa, Al- Muslimah UsratuI Amamal Fiidiyu Wal Tilifiziyun work Kack Marwan, Al- Muslimah Mar'atul I'daaduha Wa Mas'uuliyatuha of Ahmad Ababathin, Mas'uuliyatul Ab Al-Muslim FII Waladihi Tarbiyati Adnan works Baharits, Muslim Hijaabul of Ahmad Al-Barazi, Wajaa 'a Daurul Majuus by Abdullah Mohammad Al-Gharib, also the books by Shaykh Bakr Abu Zaid and Masyhur Ustadz Hasan Salman. In addition, there are many more useful books. What we mentioned above is just for example, does not mean we are limiting. In addition, the current trend has also spread small books that many useful and practical. If we note here, of course not possible, therefore each person should seek the opinion of experts and careful in selecting. And indeed, he who willed by God's goodness, surely He will pahamkan person in religious matters. Advice (10): Cassette Library at Home. Tape Recorder in the house can function good or bad. How to make use blessed by God? Among the means to do so is to make a collection of tapes that is in the house is an Islamic tapes and good. That recording of the scholars, readers of Al-Quran (Qari '), speaker, giving advice, etc. preacher. Indeed, listening to tapes of Al-Quran reading the khusyu 'of the sound some priests pray tarawih for example, has a major impact for families at home. Whether it's the influence of meaning contained within the Qur'an and the impact on their rote, as always memperdengarkannya back, also the effect in terms of the custody hearing demons like the songs, because the ears and hearts are not suitable to be mixed in it kalamullah and song -devil songs. How many fatwas cassettes that provide influence in the understanding of fiqh family members in a variety of problems they face daily in their lives. Among those proposed in this problem is to listen to recordings of the fatwas of the scholars such as Sheikh Abdul Aziz's fatwa bin Baz, Shaykh Muhammad Nashiruddin Al-Albani, Sheikh Muhammad Al-Uthaymeen, Shaykh Salih Al-Fauzan and others from the scholars who reliable science and religion. Muslims should pay attention to where he took a religious fatwa, as it is a religious affair. Therefore, behold from whom you take your religion. We should take religion from people who have known keshalihan and piety and wara'nya, relying on saheeh hadiths and not ta'ashub schools, said according to the proposition, consistent with manhaj wasath (mid), not too extreme and burdensome, or too loose and easy, and he is a person who knows (khabir) against what we ask. He said: "(He is) the Most Gracious, then ask (about God) to a more aware (Muhammad) concerning Him." (Al-Furqan: 59). Listening to preachers who preach bring people, uphold the proposition and the truth and reject kemungkaran is something very important in personal development in the Muslim household. Alhamdulillah, the tapes of the scholars were very numerous. But importantly, every Muslim should know the characteristics manhaj (method) which correct for a speaker so that the tapes should be heard and listened to secure it. Among the features are: • The speaker should be above Aqeedah Ahlus Sunnah wal Jama, faithful to the Sunna and leave heresy. • He should be based on hadiths and avoid saheeh hadiths dha'if and false. • He should observant and sensitive to the social conditions of society and what they experience. He should be able to put proper medicine on the disease. Convey to the people what works and what they crave. • Should he dare to tell the truth according to his ability and did not speak with vanity. The tapes should be placed in a drawer in an orderly manner so easily taken, will also keep the tape from lost, damaged, or made children's toys. The tapes are good we should try to spread through borrowing or presented him to others. In the use of tape recorders, it is good to put these tools in the kitchen so that will give benefits to housewives, also in the bedroom to take advantage of time until the last moment before we sleep. Advice (11): Inviting People Salih, Ulama, and the prosecutor Science to the House. Word of God Almighty: "O my Lord, forgive me, mother, father, people who get into my house with the faithful and all those who believe men and women. And Thou no increase for those who zhalim that in addition to perdition ". (Nuh: 28). Indeed the entry of people of faith can add light to your house. In addition, talks, ask questions and discuss with them will bring many benefits. People who carry musk will probably give it to you, or you bought thereof, or at least you'll find fragrant scent thereof. With their arrival, of fathers, brothers and children who come there to greet, while the women will listen from behind a veil of what they were saying. It is education for all. If you enter a good then you have rejected the entry of something bad and destruction. Advice (12): Learn the Laws of Shari'ah about Houses. Among them: Prayers at home. About the prayers of men, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "The best prayer is the man at his home, except for obligatory prayers." As for the obligatory prayers at the mosque then mandatory, unless there is udzur. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Prayer tathawwu' (sunna) of the men in his house beyond (reward) tathawwu practice 'before men, as virtue of a man praying in a congregation with prayer alone." As for women, getting into a place of prayer of the house then the main. As word of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: "The best prayer that women in the deepest part of his house." So that other people do not become priests in his house, and should not be someone sitting at the usual place occupied by the owner of the house except with his permission. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "There should be a man diimami in his realm, and not occupied for His glory (his seat) in his house except with his permission." That is, should not be advanced to the priesthood on the host, despite the fact other people better reading thereof, or a person who has powers like the host or the priest remains of the mosque. Similarly, one can not simply sit in a special place host either a chair or mattress except with his permission. Permit "O ye who believe, do not enter houses other than your house before asking for permission and greeted their inhabitants. That is better for you, for you (always) remember. If you do not see anyone in it then do not enter before you get permission. And if it is said unto you: "Back (alone)", then let you back. It is cleaner for you and Allah is Informed of what ye do. " (An-Nur: 27-28). "And go into the houses of the doors." (Al-Baqarah: 189). May enter into an empty house (which is not inhabited) by unauthorized people enter when they have stuff in it, such as houses that cater to guests. "There is no sin for you to enter the house that are not available to be inhabited, in which there is your need, and God knows what ye reveal and what ye hide." (An-Nur: 29). Why not eat in the house of relatives and friends' homes and in other people's homes that we have the key, if they do not hate it. "There is no obstacle for the blind, did not (also) for the people limping, not (too) for the sick, and not (also) for yourself, eat (with them) in your own home or at home father-your father , at-home mother of your mother, your brothers in the house of a man, a woman in your brother's house, in your home that the man your father, your father in your home that women, in your mother's brother's house a boy, at home you have the key or at your friends house. There is no obstacle for you to eat with them or alone ...". (An-Nur: 61). Prohibiting children and servants into the father's mother's bedroom, without permission, at times resting (sleeping). That is before the dawn prayer, nap time, after Isha prayers', because it feared their views fell on scenery that does not fit, if you see something accidentally at times other than those then it can be tolerated (excused). Because they are the ones who mingled in one house and serve so it is difficult to avoid this. He said: "O ye who believe, let the slaves (male and female) that you have, and those who have not baligh among you, ask for permission to you three times (in one day), ie: before Fajr prayer, when you take off her clothes (outside) you in the middle of the day and after prayers lsya '. (That) three aurat for you. There is no sin for you and not (also) on them other than (three times). They serve you , sebahagian you (no need) to sebahagian (others). Thus Allah explains the verses for you. And Allah is Knower, Wise. " (An-Nur 58). Forbidden peek someone's house without their permission. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Whoever peek of the house (people) without permission, then they prying eyes, for him there is no diyat nor qishash". Women who ditalak not go out or are expelled from their homes during the time iddah (waiting) to provide infak him. He said: "O Prophet, when you divorce the wife-wives, then come ye divorce them at the time (which is normal) and calculate the time it wants to have intercourse, and fear Allah your Lord. Do not you remove them from their homes and they should not (be allowed) out except if they do evil deeds are light. That the laws of God and those who violate the laws of God then surely he is a wrongdoer against itself. You do not know maybe God entered into after that a new thing. " (Ath-THALAQ: 1). Allow for separate male (left), the rebellious wife inside or outside the home, according to the serious benefits in religious terms. The split from his wife in the house, theses words of God: "And separate themselves from their bed." (An-Nisa ': 34). The basic split from his wife outside the house is like that happened to the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam, when he broke away from his wives in their rooms, and the Prophet sallallaahu alaihi wasalam exile outside his house wives . Not staying at home alone. "From Ibn Umar radhiyallah 'anhu that the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam forbade outs, ie, a man staying or traveling alone." The ban was due to herself feared something would happen. For example, enemy attacks, thief, or sick. The presence of friends with him would resist the desire to attack the enemy or a thief, would also help if she falls ill. No sleeping on the floor above which has no fence, so as not to fall. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "He who slept in the attic of a house that has no stone (barriers, fences), so really I have been off the responsibility thereof." For those who sleep, sometimes - with no conscious - rolling around in her sleep. If he sleeps on the top floor / roof of the house has no fence or barrier that prevented, could so he would fall down that caused death. If that happens, then nobody is guilty because of his death, all separated from responsibility for the death of that person. In addition it also causes pelecehannya against God guard him, because he did not take effort and cause. Domesticated cats do not make unclean vessel, if the cat is drinking or eating thereof. "From Abdullah bin Abi Qatadah, from his father, that placed her vessel containing water, and then licked a cat into it, he (still) perform ablution. They said: O Abu Qatadah, vessels that have been licked by a cat". He answered : "I heard the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said:" Cats are among the family members, and he is among the around you. " In another narration: "The cat was not unclean, in fact he is among the around you." Social Aspects of Residential Advice (13): Provides Opportunity to Discuss Issues, Family Issues. "While none of their business (decided) by consensus among them." (As-Shura: 38). When family members are given time and opportunity to sit together to discuss issues of internal and external family, then that is a sign that the family's attention to the family unit, the role and mutual cooperation. No doubt, that men are given the mandate of leadership in the household is the person most responsible for, determining all the decisions. But by giving opportunities to others - especially to children who reach adulthood - then it will be the responsibility of education to them, in addition to all will feel loose and airy with his feelings, because their opinions heard and respected. For example, by discussing the matter of Umrah during Ramadan or on other holidays, come to the connecting silaturrahim relatives, traveling, organizing walimah marriage, aqiqah, moving house, social projects such as counting the number of poor compatriot for the assistance or food delivery to them, as well as discussions about the crisis families, relatives and contributed to the solution. It should also be reminded of another form of an important meeting to be held, namely "Disclosure Meetings" between the two parents and children. Some of the difficulties faced by children who have baligh sometimes not possible to be solved except through personal meetings. For example, a father with his son openly discuss various issues concerning the problems of teenagers and puberty, the laws baligh. Similarly, mothers with daughters discuss these problems at once taught him the laws relating to women baligh. Father and mother should try as much as possible to help solve the problems of the children especially during their teenage. It could for example be done by using the languages of interest, such as "when I was your age ...", so readily accepted. The absence of such meetings sometimes makes some of the children make friends with friends who are not good, which in turn lead to unmitigated disaster. Advice (14): No Conflict Family Appears in Front of Children. Very rarely, a group of people living in a home without ever disputing. Reconciled after a quarrel is better and back on the truth is noble. However, that could shake the integrity of households and endanger the safety of the internal structure is apparently a variety of disputes that in the presence of other family members, so they split into two or more armies, unity became divorced apart, not to mention the impact on children's mental condition especially against those who are still small. Think about it, what happens if the father says to his son: "Do not talk with your mother." The mother also said to his daughter: "Do not talk to your father." The children become confused, torn apart his soul and all life with a full load and all difficult. Therefore, we should make sure to avoid disputes, and if there had nonetheless should we hide it. We beg Allah, may Allah mempertautkan whole heart. Advice (15): Not Allowing Log Houses to Good People who are not religious. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "And the parable of an evil friend is like a blacksmith." In the history of Bukhari stated: "And the blacksmith (could) burn your house, your clothes or you find a foul odor thereof." That is, they will burn the house with various kinds of damage and destruction. How much, because the influx of people who damaged and doubt (religion) was the cause of the emergence of hostility among family members, separation of husband from wife. God has cursed the one who deceived her from her husband or vice versa, and that led to hostility between the father with his children. Indeed, no causes of magic in your home or sometimes cases of theft and damage morals except by entering a person who is not his religion well into the house, therefore they should not be allowed in, although he is a neighbor, male or female, or persons who pretend to quickly familiar from both men and women. Some people are sometimes a bit difficult to resist, so when he saw it was in front of a door, he let her and she knew that person from among those damaged. Women who stay at home, have a great responsibility in this matter. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said:''O people, is the most sacred day? What is the most sacred day? What is the most sacred day? "They said:" Today Haji Akbar ". Then the Prophet said in the middle of his sermon on that day:" As for you right over your wives is they should not let someone that you hate stepping on a mattress (seats) you, and do not give permission (go) to the person you hate ". So should you, O Muslim women do a heavy heart if your husband or your father refused one of his female neighbor entered the house, because they know they will influence the destruction. Also, should you restraint if the woman is comparing her with your husband so you do not ask your husband will be the things that he is unable to fulfill it. You are also required to advise your husband, if you look among his friends at home there who like to invite your husband to kemungkaran. WARNING: Try as much as Possible to Be More at Home. The guardian (leader) at home makes all the problems of control, also allows him to educate and improve the situation, to assist and supervise. Some people argue that the original obligation for men is out of the house , if he does not get a place where to go before she went home. This theory is wrong. If the discharge someone from the home for compliance, it should be able to maintain a balance (between the outside and inside the house). But if the exit for immoral , spent in vain or superfluous in the affairs of the world then should he rush to reduce rush-rush and various forms of business, as well as eliminate some of the less important meetings. Really, it was so vicious people who wasted their families and stay in a stall -cafes or night clubs. We do not want echoed behind the programs the enemies of God. Below is a valuable lesson: In the brochure the French Zionist settlements are called Al- Masyriqul A'zham held in 1923 stated: "And for reached a split between someone with a family should you pull out morals from its roots, because the real passions tend to break family ties and close to things that are forbidden, because it prefers passion many stories and chat at coffee houses to disseminate family issues " . Advice (16): Researching in Observing Family Members. Who are your friends your kids? Do they have met with you or you find out about them? What do your children with them outside the house? What is in the drawer and bag them, under the pillow, mattress and what is their secret? Where did your daughter go and with whom? Some parents do not know if his son was in the closet there are the pictures and video tapes that do not educate (porn), sometimes even Sometimes drinks / pills intoxicating. Most of them do not know, his daughter went to the market with a maid, and then he sent the maid waited with the driver, then he went according to his promise with one of her lover, while others go smoke a cigarette with your friends sepermainannya evil. Those who could escape from her children would not be separated from the testimony at the Great Day, and they will not be able to escape from the horror of Judgement Day. "Surely God will hold accountable to each leader for what he leads, whether he or melalaikannya guard, so that a man asked about their family members." But there are things to note: • Supervision should it quietly. • Not to scare. • That the children do not feel lost confidence. • In advising and providing penalties should consider the age, knowledge and level of the mistakes they did. • Be careful to conduct in-depth research and a census of the soul. Someone tells the author, a father has a computer in which she agenda all his mistakes with details of dates and days at a time. If a new error occurs, she carries a special re-name the file record his daughter's mistake. then he writes the new error so that the mistakes were collected neat, both old and new. Comments: We are not in the company, and the father is not the angel that was assigned to write all the sins and mistakes. Daddy like that should read a lot of books about the basics of education in Islam. Instead, the author also knows there are people who absolutely refuse to interfere in the affairs of their children, arguing children would not be satisfied that the mistake that he did was a mistake until he was mired in it, then he knows that error by itself . These distorted beliefs originated and emerged from Western philosophy and the theory of freedom of the blame. Really, this is far from the truth. Some people let go of control to his son, for fear- he regarded that they would be hated, he said, I love him whatever he was doing. Others let go of control of their children as a form of rejection of rigorous education and hard that he experienced from his father's first (grandfather of the child), he assumes that his son should he treated the exact opposite. Others there are up to the very low level of stupidity to say: "Let our sons and daughters to enjoy his teenage years as they wish". What type of father like that thought in mind that one day their children on the Day of Judgement will be calling their parents by saying: "O father, why did you let me sinner?". Advice (17): Attention to Children at Home. In this case there are several aspects that need attention, including: • Qur'an memorization and Islamic stories. How wonderful when the father gathered his children to read to them the verses of the Quran with a little information, and give gifts to those who can memorize it. A young child may also have memorized surah Al-Kahf because his father always repeating the verse readings each time on Friday. Similarly, with teaching kids the basics of Islamic faith as contained in the hadith: "Take care of Allah, Allah will take care of you." And teach them manners (morals) and prayer-prayer. Like prayer eat, sleep, sneezing, also familiarize greetings and asked for permission. Includes a very interesting and significant effect on the child is to tell and let out to them the stories of Islam. Among those stories is the story of Noah and the flood alaihis greetings storm, the story of Prophet Ibrahim alaihis greetings in destroying the statues and then throwing the Prophet Abraham alaihis regards to the fire, the story of Prophet Moses and Pharaoh's survival of the condition he was drowned in a sea of , the story of the prophet Jonah in the belly of the fish alaihis greetings, short stories of the Prophet Joseph alaihis greetings and life journey of the Prophet Muhammad sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam as he sent him as an apostle and the story of migration, war excerpts Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam as the battle of Badr and the Ditch and the His story with other like men and camels which makes it hungry and struggling. Also the story of righteous people, like the story of Umar bin Khattab radhiyallah 'anhu with a mother with her children starving in the camp, the story of the trencher (Ashaabul Ukhduud), the story of the garden owners in the letter Nun, and three people pent in the cave and so forth. All of the above should be summarized and simplified with a few comments and decision ibrah (lesson), we do not need the stories of all kinds which deviate from the Aqeedah and full of superstition or a scary (horror) that damaged the soul of children due to fear and bequeath coward. • Watch out for the release of the children with friends street (who wants). As a result the children will go home with a greeting and a despicable character. We recommend their friends chosen from the children and their relatives and neighbors called to the house so that playing in the house. • Attention to children's toys that entertain and educate. It should provide room for the kids to play. Good also if there is a special cabinet so that children could curb their toys in the closet. Should be avoided some of the games that conflict with Shari'a, such as: musical instruments, which marked the image of the cross, or a dice game. It would be better if filled with tools that support the skills for teenagers such as carpentry, electronics, mechanics and some games (games) the computer is allowed. But in this case, we remind hazard computer program that can display pictures of women destroyer, is also a game in which there is a picture of the cross, even some say, one form of computer games gambling game. Likewise, there are games that feature four girls on the screen. People who play this game have to choose one among the four images all of which are almost similar. If you win in this game, players will be given a sign of a gift with the release of her most Nudity and porn, na'udzubillah. • Separating boys with a girl in bed. This is the difference between the way home curb religious people with people who do not pay attention to the matter of religion. • Joking and love. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam mencandai children, rubbing their heads and called them with great affection and tenderness. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam gave souvenirs to the children the first time the smallest, sometimes most of the boys climbed the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam. Below are two examples of jokes the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam to Hasan and Husayn. From Abu Hurairah radhiyallah 'anhu, who said: "The Messenger sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam stuck out his tongue to Hasan bin Ali, the boy he saw his red tongue so ta'ajub and interested her and she immediately approached him." From Ya'la bin Murrah he said: "We came out with the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam then we were invited to eat. Suddenly Husain were playing in the street then the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam soon (to him) in the presence of many people. He spread his hands and then the boy ran to and fro so as to make the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam laughed until he (successfully) to hold it and he put one hand under his chin and another child in the middle of his head and then the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam kissed her. " The discussion in this very long. Hopefully the writers a chance to discuss it separately in another book, Insha Allah. Advice (18): Set Sleep and Eat. Part of the house, had a condition like a hotel, almost the occupants did not know each other, and they rarely meet. Some children eat or sleep at any time they like to stay up and causing them to waste time, also accumulate between the food with one another. This led to the collapse of chaos such as bonding straps, passion and wasted time and formed the soul is not consistent (istiqamah). Some people who are good excuses to say, the kids are school and college did not discharge the same time, men and women, as well as with employees, laborers and traders. However, these conditions do not apply to all. Indeed, there is no pleasure in excess of one family gathering at the dinner table, then use the opportunity to know the circumstances of each and discussing something useful. For households leaders should determine the time back (home) to the house, and permission if you want to travel, especially for young children - (slightly) in age and intellect - which still feared happened upon them. Advice (19): Align the Women at Work Outside the Home. Islamic Sharia is the complement each other. When Allah ordered the women to his word: "And be ye remain in your house." (Al-Ahzab: 33). So God made someone must feed them, like a father or husband. In the original law, women are not allowed to work outside the home except for a requirement. As when Moses alaihis greeting saw two girls holding the righteous (inhibit) goat herds waiting their turn. Moses asked them: "Did you mean (with the intention of it)? Both women said:" We were not able to drink (our animals), before the pastoralists-herders were repatriates (flocks), our father is an old man advanced in years. "." (Al-Qashash: 23). Both women immediately convey the reason why they came out watered the flocks, namely because the guardian could no longer work because of advanced age. Therefore we should try to keep Muslim women do not work outside the home, as long as it allows. He said: "One of the two women said:" O my father, take it as people who work (on us), because actually the best person you've taken to work (on us) was a stronger person who can be trusted " . (Al-Qashash: 26). The woman with the sentences to explain his desire to return home so that he was protected from the ugliness and disorder that could have happened if she works outside the home. When the unbelievers in this age needs of women workers after World War I and II, then it is to replace the shortage of men. Conditions are very difficult because they have to return the pulse of progress that has been destroyed by war. Jewish program was very diligent in the liberation of women, they called for women's rights, with the intent to destroy the woman, who will then destroy the building society, which initially caused by the discharge of women to work. Although the motivation (the underlying spirit) that we have is not like they have, is every Muslim person should maintain and provide for their wives, but women's liberation movement of the more passionate, even until the demands have sent women overseas, then ask them work for a diploma that they have not been in vain. It is a mistake. Muslim community really does not require women to work this issue in a broad field. Among the arguments in this problem is the presence of men who are unemployed while the field for women continues to be opened and expanded. When we say, "in the broad field" then we look very understanding of their meaning. Because the needs of female employment in some sectors such as teaching, midwifery, and medicine in accordance with the terms of religion is still needed. We begin this discussion with the Preamble as the face, because we see that some women out to work with are not out of necessity, sometimes even with a very small salary because he felt compelled to come out to work even though he himself did not need it, even though in places that do not suit her , after it has happened many great slander. To be fair, then we say: Indeed the workings of a woman sometimes is really a necessity. For example, that women who bear and sustain the family economy after the death of a husband or father was old and weak, so was unable to work or who semisalnya. In some countries, because the values of the society not based on Islamic values then forced his wife to work to come covering the needs of the household with her husband, even a man would not hand in marriage unless the woman who has worked, more than that some of them in illegitimate contract requires that the candidate's wife worked. Conclusion: Sometimes women work for need or for purposes such as the Islamic da'wah to Allah on the battlefield education, or as entertainment as happened in some of those who had no children. The negative impact of women working outside the home, among which are: • The emergence of various forms kemungkaran, like ikhtilath (mixing between men and women without hijab), which resulted last met each other khalwat (alone), use fragrance to attract men, jewelry show to them, which in turn could continue well into the adultery. • Does not give the right husband, underestimate the problem home and neglect of children's rights (and this is our real theme.) • Reduced intrinsic meaning of the feelings of male leadership of the soul some women. Try to think about, a woman who brings the same degree as her husband diploma diplomas sometimes even higher than her husband's diploma (although this is not disgraceful), then he works with sometimes a higher salary than her husband's salary. Do women like this would feel the need fully to her husband and will obey it perfectly? Or is feeling no need to cause chaos goncangnya fundamentally domestic buildings?. Except for women who desired both by Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala. Thus, the question of maintenance of wives who work and livelihood to the families will not end. • Increase physical load, mental stress and nerves are not in accordance with the nature of women. After the presentation of benefits and losses at a glance problems working women, we say: We should be cautious to God, weighing scales syar'i any problems with, and understanding the conditions that allow women out to work and the conditions which forbade it. Let us not be blinded by worldly employment problem of the path of truth. We advise the Muslim woman to be cautious to God, to obey her husband if he wishes to leave his job for the benefit of themselves and the welfare of households. Similarly, for the husband, not a strategy for revenge and to not eat the property with his wife without justifiable. Advice (20): Keeping Secrets of Household. This problem involves several things, including: • No spreading secret intimate conjugal relations. • Not carry out marital squabbles. • Not open to the public the secret and any specificity, what if the look will endanger one household or family member. The first catastrophe, the proposition ban, are the words of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: "Verily among the worst human position in the sight of Allah on the Day of Judgement is a man who fondle his wife, and wife of a spark to her husband, then she disseminate secret" . Meaning ("yufdhi") which he did mixing, courtship and copulation as in the word of God: "How do you take it back, even though some of you have been hanging out (mixed) with another as husband and wife". (An-Nisa ': '21). Among other arguments that the ban is the word Asma 'bint Yazid, behold, he is in the Majlis Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam is the men and women sit. He also said: "Perhaps there is a man who said about what he did with his wife, and perhaps there are women who preach about what he did with her husband. So the people were silent, then I say:" Yes (true), for the sake of Allah, Messenger of Allah. It's the women doing it and the men likewise. "Messenger of Allah say:" Do not you guys do, because it's really like devils men who met with the devil woman on the street and then he was intercourse with the people in view "." In the history of Abu Dawud mentioned: "Is there among you who, when men came to his wife and locked the door and netting out the obstacle and he screened by the curtain of Allah?" They replied: "Yeah right". Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said (continued): "After that he sat down and said: I have done so and do so". They were silent, then the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam facing the women then said: "Do any of you have a talk about it?" They were silent. Then arose a girl plump down on one knee and raised himself to the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam that he saw and heard his words. Then he said: "O Messenger of Allah, the men really talk about it, so it is with the ladies." So the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Do you know what this parable? Likeness it is like a devil woman who met with the devil man in the street, then he is human hajatnya lampiaskan see him" The second case that is brought out of the house squabbling husband and wife, in many cases actually add complicated problem, a third party to intervene in marital disputes so that in most cases adding new problems. Way out-if others want to help, especially those closest to them - that is by doing correspondence between the two. Should not interfere in these affairs, except for reasons to reconcile the parties directly. When we do as instructed by Allah sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: "Then send a Hakam (conciliator interpreter) of a family man and a woman from a family Hakam. If both people Hakam was intended to make repairs, Allah will give taufik to husband and wife were ". (An- Nisa ': 35). The third case, that is invite danger to the household or one of its members to spread its secrets. It should not be, because he included in the words of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: "They should not endanger yourself and should not be (too) endanger others." Among the examples are as embodied in the word of God: "God made a wife of Noah and Lot's wife parable for those who disbelieve. Both are under the supervision of two servants who are righteous people among the servants of us, then the second wife to both her husband's betrayal ...". (At-Tahrim: 10). Tafseer Ibn Katheer in quoting this verse says: "Noah's wife was always a secret peek of Noah, when there are people who believe in Noah, then he informs the authorities of the faith of Noah about it. The wife of Lut then if Luth receive male guests, dikabarkannya matter to ordinary people who commit crimes (homosex) ", namely that they come and do the deed homosex with the guest. Several Morals At Home Advice (21): Socializing Intercourse Good (hospitality) in the House. From Aisha radhiyallah 'anhu, who said: Messenger of Allah sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam said: "If Allah 'Azza wa Jalla goodness willed to a family so that He bestows upon them the good society." In another narration: "Verily Allah if you love a family so that he bestowed upon them the good society." This means that either treat each other well. This is one reason for happiness in the home. A good association and hospitality is very useful between the two spouses, also with the children, who will bear the results thereof can not be produced by violence. As word of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: "Verily, Allah loves the good society (hospitality), and He gives to the social good (hospitality), what is not given to violence and what is not given to any other." Advice (22): Helping Families in Homework. Many men are reluctant to do homework, some of them believes that among the causes reduction in rank and dignity of men that went with other family members do their jobs. The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam sew his own clothes, mend his sandals and doing work usually done by men in their homes. As stated by his wife Ayesha radhiyallah 'anha when she asked what was done by the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam in his home. Ayesha radhiyallah 'anhu answered with what he saw himself. In another narration: "He is a human being among all people, clean clothes, milking goats and serve him." Ayesha radhiyallah 'anhu was also asked what is done by the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam in his home. He said: "He is (together), jobs-meaning family helps family- and when to come (when) he came out to pray the prayer." If we practice it today, means we have to realize some benefit: • imitate the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam. • We will help the family. • We feel humble and not takabbur (pride). Part of the husband asked the wife to serve food immediately, while the pot was still on the stove fire, screaming her little boy wanted fed, he did not touch the child, also did not want to wait a little wait for food. Should some of the above hadith as a lesson and warning. Advice (23): Be Gentle and joking with family. Be gentle to his wife and children is one factor that could spread happiness climate and the close relationships among family. Therefore, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam advised Jabir to marry a woman who was a virgin. He said: "Why (do not you choose) virgin (so) you can mencandainya and he mencandaimu, and you (could) make her laugh and she makes you laugh." "Everything in which there is no recollection of God is futile, except for four cases: percandaan man against his wife ...". Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam mencandai Ayesha radhiyallah' anha when he was bathing with him. Aisha recounts: "I and the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam never take a bath together from a single scoop for both (in turn), then he beat me so I say" let me, let me ", he said, are both located in a state junub". The joke Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam to small children so very much to mention. He often loved and mencandai Hasan and Hussein, as we have done in advance. Perhaps this also causes young children very happy with his arrival from travel. They immediately rushed to pick up the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam, as mentioned in the saheeh hadeeth: "When coming from the trip, he dihamburi by small children from their families." Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam hold them, as narrated by Abdullah bin Ja'far: "When the Prophet sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam came from traveling, he rushed to us, rushed to me, to Hasan and Husayn, he said:" The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam took one of us in between his hands, and the other on the back so we entered the city of Medina. "Compare this with the situation between some houses are barren, no jokes, no laughter, tenderness, nor love affection. Whoever thinks that kissing the children would reduce the authority of the father then he should read the following hadeeth: from Abu Hurairah radhiyallah 'anhu, who said: "The Messenger sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam kissed Hasan ibn Ali was at his side there is al-Aqra 'son of Out At- Tamimi was sitting. So Al-Aqra 'said: "I have ten children, I have never kissed one of them." So the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam saw him then said: "Whoever does not love, surely he is not loved." Advice (24): Getting rid of Bad Morals at Home. One of the family members could not escape the bad morals and deviant, such as: lying, gossip, pit or the like. Bad character should be combated and eliminated. Some people think that physical punishment is the only way out to resolve the issue. Below Ayesha radhiyallah 'anha narrated the hadith-the issue of full-charge of education: "The Messenger sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam when knowing one's family members to do so lies, he continued to turn away from it so that it says repent." From the above hadith, it is clear that turning away and Hijr (segregate, silence, left) did not ask him to chat and give justly punished - in this case - is more influential than physical punishment. Therefore, educators should think about it at home. Advice (25): Gantungkanlah Whips that can viewed by family members. Appeared and beckoned form of punishment is one of the methods of higher education. Therefore, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam explained the reasons why should be hung from a whip or a cane at home. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Gantungkanlah whip which can be viewed by family members, because he had more to educate them." By looking at a tool to punish, making people afraid to do harm, because it was horrified by the punishment that would form the receipt, so he became the motivation (incentive) for them in a civilized and noble. Ibn Al-Anbari said: "There is no history that says to hit with it, because the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam did not tell this to anyone, but he wanted to educate them you do not loose" Beating was not a basis in teaching. Not allowed to use it unless you have exhausted all means to educate or burden to perform the required obedience. As word of God: "The women that you worried about nushuz (leave liabilities married wife) was then nasehatilah them and separate them in bed them and beat them." (An-Nisa: 34). In an orderly manner, as well as in the words of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: "Command your children to pray when they were seven years old and beat for leaving when they were ten years old." Using the penalty at without required is a violation. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam advised women not to marry a man because he did not put a stick from his neck, that is because he likes beating up women. But those who think no punishment at absolutely necessary, because imitation on educational theory infidels, then this opinion is wrong and contrary to the texts syar'i. Misguidance misguidance Domestic-Advice (26): Be aware of entry that is not a mahram relative to the wife who is in the house when the husband sedangTiada. Advice (27): Separating Between Men with Women in the Event of Family Visits friendship. Advice (28): Beware of Dangers at Home Drivers and Helpers. Advice (29): Be Keluarkanlah People Kebanci-bancian from Your home. Advice (30): Beware of the Dangers of Film. Advice (31): Be cautious of Crime Phone. Advice (32): Compulsory Eliminate Every Identity - Whatever shape vanity-Religious People Pagan, Including Those god and God. Advice (33): Eliminate The drawings animate creatures. Advice (34): forbid smoking in Your house. Advice (35): Do not Maintain the Dog in the House. Advice (36): Avoiding of Decorating Houses with Assorted Color (Excess-overage). Houses Viewed From Within And From Outside Advice (37): Choosing a Location and Design House is Right. No doubt, a true Muslim will notice about the selection of the location and exact location of the house. He will implement several programs for a residential home so that proper Muslim. In terms of location, for example: • Houses should be adjacent to the mosque. This is very beneficial. When the call to prayer echoing call of prayer, he can immediately go to the mosque and get jama'ah. For the women, they will usually listen to reading the Quran from loudspeakers. As for small children, they can freely obeying the Quran recitation Halaqah, learning the Koran and so forth. • In order not in one building with the wicked, or in a residential village there are those who disbelieve, for example in the middle of the village there is a swimming pool for public, mix-ups between men and women for instance. • In order not to see and not see, if there just happened then may use the veil, or by elevating the fence. In terms of design, for example: • He should pay attention to the separation between men with women and foreign guests, such as entrances, seating space and so on. If not possible, then can use the veil or hijab. • Covering the windows with screens or satire (curtain), so that the person who is in the room not visible by neighbors or passers by, especially at night when bright light. • Should not use the toilet facing the Qibla. • It should select a large house and a lot of home furnishings. This is because a few things: "Verily, Allah likes it when seeing his former blessings on His servants". "Three things, including happiness and three things, including suffering. Including happiness is: women Shalihah that if you see it please you, when you go from it you feel safe on him and on your treasure, and animal mounts, so he menghantarkanmu follow your friends as well as a large house and lots of furniture. And including misery is a woman who, when you see it and you feel reluctant, he attacked you with his tongue, if you leave him you do not feel safe for himself and for the treasure, and a slow animal, if you hit it it will tire you and if you leave it (do not hit it) so no menghantarkanmu follow your friends as well as a few home furnishings. " • Looking at health, for example about the air vents and the entry of sunlight into the house. But some of the above and other matters should be measured in accordance with the capabilities of existing materials and conditions, should not be forced. Advice (38): Choosing a neighbor before Selecting a Home. Because of the importance of this issue, should be discussed in isolation, so a bit detailed. Neighbors in our era, have no small influence on the neighbor next door. Because each berdekatannya homes and gathering them in flats, condominiums or apartments. Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam reported, four things, including happiness, among them a good neighbor. He also mentions four things including misery, of whom an evil neighbor. Because of the dangers of this evil neighbor, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam refuge in Allah from it to pray: "O Allah, I seek refuge to You from a bad neighbor in a dwelling house, because the nomadic neighbors (sedentary life, including contract some time, important life) will be moved ". Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam ordered all Muslims to take refuge from it by saying: "you shelter in Allah from the evil neighbor in a dwelling house, because the nomadic neighbors will move from you". In this small book, certainly not sufficient to explain in detail about the influence of evil neighbor to the husband and wife and children, a variety of painful disorders thereof, and the distress of living side by side with him. However, by practicing the hadiths that have been past (the problem of neighbors) is sufficient for people who want to take lessons. Maybe in between the road to solve the concrete that is - as practiced by some people - by renting a house adjacent to the evil neighbor to the people who was related to them, though for it to be lost from the material side, because the real good neighbor can not rewarded with material, of any size. Advice (39): Noting that Need Improvement and Support Provide Comfort. Among the favors of God to us in this day and age that gave us the means convenience of making it easier for our life problems in the world, it also saves time. As the AC (air conditioner), fridge / washing machine etc. We recommend that if you have tools like that, we do not use it with wasteful and mubadzir. Must also be able to distinguish between the needs of tertiary (complement) that are needed and useful to the needs of tertiary useless. Among the forms of attention to the house is to fix the furniture and equipment that have been damaged. Some people underestimate, and their wives complain because of the many insects, garbage piled up so that cause odor, there are a lot of broken furniture and goods scattered. The things on top no doubt, including those that obstruct the realization of happiness, cause health problems and domestic. People who are healthy minds will certainly resolve these problems. Advice (40): Noting Health and Treatment of Family Members. If one of the family members of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam was sick, he gave the spell by reading the letters mu'awwidzat (surat Al-lkhlash, surat Al-Falaq An-Nas and letters). And when a family member he sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam made soup made him sick, then they were sent inhaling the soup. He said: "Verily, the soup strengthens the hearts of the grieving and open the hearts of the sick as any one of you clean the dirt from his face." About some way of preventive and safety; Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "If you have evening then resist your children (at home), because the real devil when it roamed. And if some of the night had passed then let them (out for a while , if it is necessary), lock the doors and call it the name of God, and shut all the vessel as well call it the name of God, even by putting something (piece of wood, for example) on it, and turn off your lights. " In the history of Muslim: "Lock your doors, close your vessels, turn off your lights, eratkanlah you drink bottle caps. For indeed Satan does not open the locked door, do not open the lid, do not release the bond. And lo mice it can cause a fire at home against the occupants. " Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said: "Do not leave a fire in your home while you're sleeping."