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This I Believe

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					D.S. Beard This I Believe

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When thinking about what I was going to write about for this assignment, I first thought about what I was really supposed to write about. Contemplating the endless beliefs someone can have and which ones I really have, lead me to the realization that what a persons believes is a major part of who he/she ultimately becomes. I also discovered that beliefs also broaden or narrow the fields of opportunities for achievement, shape your goals, authenticate fears, and even crush dreams. Over my lifetime, I’ve believed countless numbers of things that were sometimes valid, sometimes common, and sometimes unreasonable. Things ranging from four leaf clovers bringing me good luck (not that I was ever lucky enough to find one) to stepping on the crack would break my mothers back; from being afraid that one of the fugitives from America’s Most Wanted would be the next person to knock on my door, to I would one day be called upon by some intergalactic being to protect the planet from evil as apart of a team of 5 teenagers in bright, multicolored uniforms, who would come to be known as the Power Rangers.

Most of these beliefs eventually lead to either life-enriching realizations or various disappointments. All of which helped me become the person I am today am aspire to become in the future. Toward the end of my senior ear in high school, my English teacher, Mrs.Klinefelter-Lee asked my class a question to the likes of, “Who here thinks they are a person of character?” The thoughts I had at that very moment first came to mind when considering what I really believe. In that moment, as cliché as it sounds, my whole life flashed before my eyes. In that moment, I realized all I had been through, all I had overcome. Things like having a “check-faced father” (him sending a check, maybe a phone call on my birthday, but never really being there), or like having so little food in the kitchen for me, my mom, and little sister that we’d have to go to a local church for free, donated groceries.

Innumerable experiences like these could lead a child to depression, bad behavior, or worse. But I think the only thing that got me through wasn’t thinking how life couldn’t possibly get any worse, but trying to imagine all the good things that could come

D.S. Beard This I Believe

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after the insufferable situation I’d just overcome. I thought of only the good things that could come, never the negative. I wished so badly that we would win the lottery, I would get a scholarship to some prestigious, overseas boarding school, that my family would just STOP having the world just shit on us and not care. I wished, and prayed, and hoped so hard that my life would take a complete u-turn that I started to believe it would happen. I figured that it was only a matter of time until the karma I had accumulated from taking it all in stride would begin to pay off.

And one day, it did. In time, my mom got a promotion at the hotel she was working at; she started school at an assisted living facility so she could become a GNA (both of which meant significant pay raises and no more food shopping at churches and the local housing authority). I was moved into higher-level classes at school, I got my dream job at Best Buy (in the department with games, gaming consoles, music, and movies-a 9th grader’s fantasy land), and we got a new car, just to name a few.

Not sure if only good things happened to me because I believed they would, or if believing they would made me appreciate the good things in life and minimize the bad; I figured that what I realized from my moment of epiphany had been working so far, so I stuck with it.

When thinking about yourself, you may believe that random memories are just popping into your head, but they just may be the ones that are most important to you; simply because they are the ones you first think of when you think about yourself. When I think about myself, these are the memories that come to me. You might see them as the bad ones, but I see them as reminders. I see them as a manual for the way I should live the rest of my life. I see the outlook I had as a child as the outlook everyone should have. To always see the silver lining, to see the good in people despite the seemingly evil things they do, to remind myself that it is only a matter of time until things get better.


				
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