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The Racially Sensitive Are the Racially Conflicted Written on November 27, 2006 Survivor’s decision to split this season’s ensemble of castaways into racially-segregated groups has racial activists all up in arms. They claim the show will breed racial conflict and lead to increased divisiveness, and, in certain ways, they may indeed be right. However, with their own divisive tendencies, racial activists sometimes see potential conflict where we can discover resolution instead. In fact, people who persistently think about conflict are often the most conflicted themselves, and, as a result, they can become a greater part of the problem than the solution. Divisiveness can only be felt when we are already viewing our lives through the lens of conflict. Of course, any new and provocative idea – like this Survivor show – will always have the potential of pushing buttons and bringing highly-charged emotions to the surface. But how is this really a problem? If the show increases racial tensions, it simply demonstrates that such emotions (and their underlying conflicts) already exist. Isn’t it important to get these issues into the open so that we can have some real dialogue – dialogue that might bring us to new levels of interracial understanding, acceptance, and appreciation? By erecting boundaries, the racially sensitive can prevent such progress from happening – even if they are unintentional or in defense. Boundaries can only ever serve as short-term solutions to short-term problems because they always eventually fall. And currently, we may have had too many racial boundaries for too long. Our hope should be that the show can help us tear down our outdated walls of separation and build bridges in their place. Besides, what ever happened to the fun of competition, which might actually allow us to showcase and appreciate our individually unique and ethnically diverse differences? As we strive toward the ideals of justice and equality, we must remember to acknowledge, accept, and respect the basic fact of life that, in many important ways, we are not created equal. We might have equal potential, but we all have different kinds of potential. Some are born from the womb painting Picassos, while I still struggle to draw stick figures. My gifts are most definitely elsewhere. And your gifts may be as well. Our uniqueness is the expression of our individuality and, just as we possess individual differences, we also have cultural differences. Certain patterns clearly run through certain cultures. And even within cultures, there is a tremendous amount of individual variety. Your cultural character does not have to limit you. Instead, it can add to you. So we must ignore the downside of the “everyone’s the same” mantra, which tries too often to negate our differences where our differences are valuable and meaningful.
So if you watch this season’s “Survivor,” make sure to watch with an eye of appreciation that celebrates racial differences and the vast array of individual uniqueness which exists within each race. Then, you will realize what can truly bring us together, having pride in our individuality as well as our collectivity, in our uniqueness as well as our sameness. A heart cell and lung cell have the same basic DNA, but they can still be appreciated for the different functions that they serve in the body. Furthermore, the differences in their unique functions do not have to become a source of conflict. Instead, in their healthiest state, these cells actually enjoy the exact opposite scenario, an opportunity to bridge their differences and come together in the grander pursuit of health. Similarly, we must learn to unite within the “body” of our collective life. We will only be able to embrace each other, when we can appreciate each other, we will only be able to appreciate each other, when we can accept each other; we will only be able to accept each other, when we can understand each other; and we will only be able to understand each other, when we decide to pursue knowing each other. But we cannot come to know each other through the edifice of a wall. Racial activists certainly have a vitally important role of increasing awareness and action regarding the unfortunate inequalities in our current system. But sometimes, they do not realize the less constructive effects that can come from some of their chosen methods of expression. Competition only puts up walls for those who see the game as having only one winner in the midst of a bunch of losers. And for those who choose to see life through this lens, I urge you to watch Andre Agassi’s final tennis tournament and tell me whether or not he won something through the process. I ask whether John Stockton was a winner though he never won an NBA championship. I challenge you to watch any of the past Olympics and explain how you came to the belief that separation in competition can’t help us celebrate our differences and bring us together in the game of life. Each contestant of Survivor will choose how to approach this season’s game. And each person in the audience will choose how to watch the game. And, as for the enraged racial activists, maybe it is time to question your own assumptions; monitor and work on your own thoughts, feelings and actions; and then trust the world and its people to handle our racial challenges constructively. We surely have not yet come to deal perfectly with racial issues. But we will only come to do so by courageously and openly bringing our lives together in this challenging forum called life. For a book that explains these ideas more fully, visit: www.inspiringrevolutions.com/thriving.php
To learn more about diversity, unity, and leadership, you can also purchase The Makings of a President at: www.inspiringrevolutions.com/presidentbook.php
To begin applying these ideas to your life, answer the questions below: - What difference in cultural heritage, principles, and lifestyle do you reject and separate from? Which of your own cultural ways, principles, and lifestyle choices do other people reject and separate from? - What is the value and beauty in your ways? Stepping back from yourself for a moment and also realizing that any extreme can have its faults, what is the value and beauty in others’ ways? - Is a tulip different than a rose? While there may be individual preferences, are they not both beautiful and rich with life? - Is a flower petal different than a leaf? Are the unique differences in their functions and purpose any less valuable to the making, living, and thriving of the whole flower and the generations of flowers to come? - Where in your life and society do you feel conflict and competition between your way of life and others’ ways of life? Do you avoid or confront your conflicts and competition? - If you confront them, is it the kind of conflict and competition that seeks to tear down and overcome one another or that pushes each other to strive toward individual and equally important greatness? - What is more important, winning or developing? Can rose beat a tulip at being a tulip? Can a tulip beat a rose at being a rose? What if we had only tulips (or only roses)? - Can we maintain diversity while still being unified? What prevents you from doing so? - Can avoiding your conflicts and competition by staying separate and pushing problems under the rug help you in resolving those conflicts and benefitting from the positive parts of competition? - Do the problems go away? Or do they simmer underneath during “good times,” just waiting for “bad times” to trigger them once again? - Would you rather confront conflicts during the peace and prosperity of “good times,” or during the strife and scarcity of “bad times?” - If you avoid your conflicts and competition, what prevents you from facing them? What do you fear might happen? How will that fear come true because you avoid the issues? What would it take to have the courage to confront them peacefully and excitedly? - How can showcasing our differences be done joyfully even during “bad times?” How can doing so be valuable? - If, for one moment, you could imagine society as a body, how might your ways and the ways of others that you reject live together in your differences by fulfilling different outcomes and functions toward the larger purpose of the body?
- What are the larger life purposes that we can all relate to and desire and that can inspire the united vision you now have in your head? - How can your cultural ways, principles, and lifestyle choices add to that larger purpose? How can others’ cultural ways, principles, and lifestyle choices add to it? - What do you need to do and what personal issues do you need to resolve within yourself to make sure that both sides – yourself and others – are represented? - What can you do now to step toward that vision – just as you had to take those beginning steps, so many years ago, toward your vision of learning how to walk?