jokes and humor

ROBOT HUMOR - JOKES [1] What’s Silver and Lies in the Grass ? R2 Doo Doo… [2] In 40 years robots will be doing most of the work Humans don’t want to do; especially illegal robots from Mexico. [3] A ventriloquist doing a nightclub gig with his dummy on his knee tells a dumb robot joke; a beverage service robot stops and shouts at the ventriloquist. “What gives you the right to stereotype artificial intelligence that way? You should be ashamed of yourself”. Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to stammer an apology. “You keep out of this, buster!” it yells, “I’m talking to the little idiot on your knee.” [4] A golfer walks into the clubhouse of the local country club. He tells the golf pro behind the counter that he wants to do 18 and he is going to need a caddy. The golf pro informs him that the country club is running a promotion and if he tries out one of their experimental robot caddies, he can golf for free. The golfer agrees and takes out the robot caddy. While on the golf course the robot caddy tells the golfer the wind speed, distance, even how hard to hit which club. He has the best game of his life. The next time the golfer goes to the country club, he tells the golf pro that he wants to do 18 holes and that he wants to get one of the robot caddies. The pro informs the golfer that they don't have the robot caddies anymore. The golfer, all upset, tells him how great they were and asks him what happened. The golf pro tells him that members were complaining that the sun would reflect of their metallic material and into their eyes. The golfer asks him why they didn't just paint the robots black? The golf pro said that they did, but the next day, 3 of them didn't show up and the other 3 robbed the pro shop. [5] In yesterdays news was a story about a robot in the Robot Olympics that failed the gender test; today it got hit on by Prince Charles. [6] How many robots does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three – one to hold the bulb and two to turn the ladder. Have a good one? Send it to: museum.of.robotics@mindspring.com

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