after-adultery by cavpres


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									Control Negative Thinking
to Rebuild Your Marriage
      After Adultery

                         written by: Coleta Stewart
Control Negative Thinking to Rebuild Your Marriage After Adultery

Control Negative Thinking to Rebuild Your Marriage
After Adultery
 Being betrayed by someone you loved and trusted can feel like a train wreck. The feelings
 of anger caused by hurt and deception from someone you loved with your whole heart and
 soul can become unbearable at times. Emotionally healing after adultery will take super
 human effort, time and patience. In order to move forward, you need to start letting go of
 the negative thoughts and emotions that consume and dominate your mind on a daily basis.
 To start the healing process, you first need to take control of your negative thinking and
 emotions. This is easier said than done and there is no magic pill to take that is going to
 make it all go away in an instant. For the sake of your own sanity, you will have to
 consciously make the effort to reclaim your mind.
 Right now your life after adultery maybe filled with thoughts of your cheating spouse and
 his paramour. You're thinking all sorts of crazy thoughts like: is the person younger or
 better looking than me or can the marriage survive the strain of infidelity? What does he or
 she got that I don't have? In order to overcome such thinking, you need to recognize the
 triggers, that is, patterns, times or places that trigger your mental anguish and find ways to
 break the pattern
 Dr. Frank Gunzburg, a noted authority on marriage and infidelity, and creator of the
 program: “How to Survive an Affair,” recommends a three step process for dealing with
 negative thoughts. The first step is to track your thoughts so as to develop awareness as to
 when you are most likely to have more or less negative thoughts. Next is to “uncover
 negative thought-loop patterns” and that is to be conscious as to when you experience these
 emotions. And lastly he suggests that you find ways to “break negative thought-loop
 patterns” by stopping the problem thinking and replacing it with more positive thoughts.
 You can learn more about Dr. Gunzburg's program here.
 Healing after adultery is not an easy process. But hang in there if you and your spouse are
 committed to saving the marriage and he or she continues to reassure you, then the images
 and negative thoughts will gradually decrease. Seek help to reclaim your mind and become
 master of your thoughts once again.

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