You cannot control women. You can only control yourself! Practice Healthy Indifference: Indifference towards her interest in you, but not towards her needs and autonomy. Be direct and honest at all times. Practice Staying Onsides: Gently moving away from a woman’s interest, thereby causing her to sell herself to you. This is a good strategy because a woman at rest tends to stay at rest and a woman in motion tends to stay in motion. Never become more enthusiastic about your interest than the woman you are with. Rather than being overly aggressive and focusing on your own needs, always focus on making a woman comfortable and meeting her needs (including helping her find a good match, whether or not that is you). The more you focus on meeting a woman’s needs, the more you will get your needs met. Match a woman’s body movements, tonality and vocabulary. Set an Opening “No” Agreement: Make an agreement establishing that a woman will tell you “no” if she feels you are not a good match. Silence allows women to talk and think, and should not be filled with gibberish. Practice Switching: Consciously making a shift to focus the conversation back on the woman by asking a good question. This can be used to clarify the meaning of a woman’s question. Women always want information for a reason, and that reason might not be obvious.
Aching: Pain in one’s social life. The vast majority of the time, a woman will decide to go out with you because she has some form of aching. Your own personal “benefits” (i.e. your recent promotion) mean very little. Find a woman with current aching. If you meet a woman who has no current aching, move on to one who does. Find a woman’s aching by asking her questions that allow her to bring up her own problems and become emotionally involved in a discussion with you. The proper Aching Dialogue: 1. If you are attracted to a woman, compliment her. 2. Immediately afterwards, ask her if she is involved with anyone (and if she is, find out if it serious). This focuses the conversation on her present aching, and asking early on saves you time and energy. Asking questions about a woman’s current relationship may upset her, but it will put her “in motion” (and is the only way that you will have a chance to go out with her). After going out with a woman, ask her to . rate her experience from 1 to 10. If it is between 7 and 9, ask her what you can do to make it a 10. If it is under 7, ask her why. It doesn’t matter what anyone says, does or thinks about you. It only matters how you feel about yourself. Rather than the external world creating your internal state, your internal state creates the external world. Abandon any need for approval. When you want to ensure that all people will like you, you are not able to conduct the aching dialogue because of the risks involved. Furthermore, it makes confrontation and physical intimacy very difficult, and it is easy for you to be taken advantage of.