Matthew Loren Sperry

					Matthew Loren Sperry
November 6, 1968 June 5, 2003
Thy Gentleness Hath Made Me Great
In Memory of Matthew Loren Sperry                             El Maley Rachamim – Most Compassionate
June 9th, 2003 Chapel of the Chimes
                                                              To the most compassionate on high and within,
Gathering   Performed by Philip Gelb on shakuhachi            Grant perfect rest under the wings of holy presence,
Welcome     Rabbi David                                       the wings of Shechina,
                                                              among the holy and pure
Music       “Wicked Little Town” performed by the             who shine with heavenly splendor
            San Francisco Cast of Hedwig and The Angry Inch   to the soul of Matthew Loren Sperry
                                                              who has passed from this world,
Speaker     Wendy Lichtman
                                                              may his rest be as restful as in Eden’s Garden.
Music       Performed by Matthew’s dear friends.              Source of compassion, shelter him
                                                              under your wings forever more
Speaker     Stacia Biltekoff and Charlotte Biltekoff          even as his soul remains woven in the fabric of life.
Music       “Origins of Love” performed by the                The Eternal is his portion.
            San Francisco Cast of Hedwig and The Angry Inch   May he rest in peace.
                                                              And let us say: Amen.
Speaker     Harriet Sperry and Sam Sperry
                                                              The Mourner’s Kaddish
Music       Performed by Matthew’s dear friends.
                                                              Yit’gadal v-yit’kadash shmey rabah - Ameyn
Speaker     Philip Gelb
                                                              B-alma di-v’ra chirutey v-yamlich malchutey
Music       Tamuke “Offering” performed by Philip Gelb        b-cha’yey’chon u-v-yo’mey’chon
                                                              u-v-cha’yey d-chol beyt Yisra’el
Music       Performed by Matthew’s dear friends.
                                                              ba-agala u-viz’mahn kariv v-im’ru:
Tribute     “Snapshots of Matthew” Open Mike & Open           (Together:) Ameyn!
            Music Introduced by Robert Schoen & Gil Sperry    Y’hey shmey rabah m’vorach l-olam
                                                                    u-l-ol’mey ol’ma’ya.
Speaker     Dan Plonsey
                                                              Yit’barach v-yish’tabach v-yit’pa’ar
Music       Free improvised music tribute to Matthew          v-yit’romam v-yit’na’sey
                                                              v-yit’hadar v-yit’ah’leh
Closing     Rabbi David
                                                              v-yit’halal shmey di-kud’shah, brich hu.
Prayer      Eyl Maley Rachamim performed                      L-eyla min kol bir’chata v-shirata
            by Diane Wirtschafter                             tush’b’chata v-nechemata da-amiran b-alma.
                                                              V-imru: Ameyn
Prayer      Mourners’ Kaddish, Rabbi David
                                                              Y’hey shlama rabah min sh’ma’yah,
Music       Closing celebration music performed               v-cha’yim, aleynu v-al kol Yis’ra’el,
            by Red Hot Chachkas                               v-imru: Ameyn
Healing     Shiva will begin at Wendy Lichtman and Jeff       Oseh shalom bim’romav,
            Mandel’s home directly following the service.     hu ya’ah’seh shalom ahleynu,
            See insert for directions and map.                v’ahl-kol Yisra’el,
                                                              v-al kol yosh’vey tey’vel
                                                              V-imru: Ameyn.

                                                              May the great essence be magnified soon in this world, and
                                                              be blessed forever, and praised and lauded and raised up.
                                                              And yet, these words of praise and blessing are
                                                              insufficient, but we say Amen anyway.
                                                              May harmonious peace be established in this world for us
                                                              and everyone, and let us say: Amen.
Stacia’s Words for Matthew                                      Made no sense to me
                                                                He showed me slowly
I’m gathering words                                             No teasing or judgements
Like the tiny pieces of me                                      No coddling – he let me figure it out myself
Some with jagged edges too sharp to touch                       I opened my eyes to an incredible adventure right underneath me
Some pouring out of me                                          He was always showing me the
Tears salting the shoulders of all of you                       Miraculous of every day

Matthew let me do things gradually                              Look Lila – this is ivy – it grows up fences
He supported me through my unfolding
He’s doing that now                                             I held back suddenly unsure
He knows I don’t know how to do this                            Of how to swim
It’s okay                                                       So he held me.
He says                                                         An arm around my waist
Just do it one breath at a time                                 We swam like that the whole time
If you’re breathing                                             He could have gone out further
You’re doing it                                                 Swam faster
Let’s breathe because we can                                    But he said he enjoyed it better when he was with me
Inhale…                                                         Thy Gentleness Hath Made Me Great
In our collective breath he rests
And holds us
We sustain him as he sustains us                                Additional Information
                                                                In the following days, Shiva will continue at Stacia and Matthew’s
On our honeymoon                                                home at 388 49th Street. Please feel free to visit during the day.
The real one after the wedding                                  Stacia would love to see you.
When we were in Hawaii
Not this latest one when we decided again how much              Shiva will end on Father’s Day, with a memorial walk leaving
we love each other                                              from Stacia and Matthew’s home at 4:00 p.m.
But the real one – the one that was mostly about food           Please visit Matthew’s online memorial at
He decided he didn’t like lobster                      to share your thoughts on Matthew.
I discovered I could eat two
                                                                Please check in the coming days for information
We realized we could easily spend $100 a meal
                                                                on the1st Annual Matthew Sperry Concert Series and the various
We loved it, the eating together, it was almost the best part   funds that are being set up for his family. Please make sure we have
We went snorkeling                                              your email address.
I’m not sure I had ever been
He’s a natural in the water                                     An outdoor memorial is located at the corners
                                                                of Vallejo and Powell in Emeryville.
Everyone thought he was a native
Betrayed only by his rented gear and pasty white new bride      Stacia and Matthew’s families extend their sincere thanks
I couldn’t figure out how to                                    for the outpouring of love and support.
Hold / not hold my breath
Head underwater still breathing
Wicked Little Town                          The Origin of Love
You know, the sun is in your eyes           When the earth was still flat,                  And some Indian god
And hurricanes and rains                    And the clouds made of fire,                    Sewed the wound up into a hole,
and black and cloudy skies.                 And mountains stretched up to the sky,          Pulled it round to our belly
You’re running up and down that hill.       Sometimes higher,                               To remind us of the price we pay.
You turn it on and off at will.             Folks roamed the earth                          And Osiris and the gods of the Nile
There’s nothing here to thrill              Like big rolling kegs.                          Gathered up a big storm
or bring you down.                          They had two sets of arms.                      To blow a hurricane,
And if you’ve got no other choice           They had two sets of legs.                      To scatter us away,
You know you can follow my voice            They had two faces peering                      In a flood of wind and rain,
through the dark turns and noise            Out of one giant head                           And a sea of tidal waves,
of this wicked little town.                 So they could watch all around them             To wash us all away,
                                            As they talked; while they read.                And if we don’t behave
Oh Lady, luck has led you here              And they never knew nothing of love.            They’ll cut us down again
and they’re so twisted up                   It was before the origin of love.               And we’ll be hopping round on one foot
they’ll twist you up. I fear.                                                               And looking through one eye.
the pious, hateful and devout,              The origin of love
you turn and mix til you’re turned out,                                                     Last time I saw you
the wind so cold it burns,                  And there were three sexes then,                We had just split in two.
you’re burning out and blowing round.       One that looked like two men                    You were looking at me.
And if you’ve got no other choice           Glued up back to back,                          I was looking at you.
you know you can follow my voice            Called the children of the sun.                 You had a way so familiar,
through the dark turns and noise            And similar in shape and girth                  But I could not recognize,
of this wicked little town.                 Were the children of the earth.                 Cause you had blood on your face;
                                            They looked like two girls                      I had blood in my eyes.
The fates are vicious and they’re cruel.    Rolled up in one.                               But I could swear by your expression
You learn too late you’ve used two wishes   And the children of the moon                    That the pain down in your soul
like a fool                                 Were like a fork shoved on a spoon.             Was the same as the one down in mine.
                                            They were part sun, part earth                  That’s the pain,
and then you’re someone you are not,        Part daughter, part son.                        Cuts a straight line
and Junction City ain’t the spot,                                                           Down through the heart;
remember Mrs. Lot                           The origin of love                              We called it love.
and when she turned around.                                                                 So we wrapped our arms around each
And if you’ve got no other choice           Now the gods grew quite scared
You know you can follow my voice            Of our strength and defiance
                                                                                            Trying to shove ourselves back together.
through the dark turns and noise            And Thor said,
                                                                                            We were making love,
of this wicked little town.                 “I’m gonna kill them all
                                                                                            Making love.
                                            With my hammer,
                                                                                            It was a cold dark evening,
                                            Like I killed the giants.”
                                                                                            Such a long time ago,
                                            And Zeus said, “No,
                                                                                            When by the mighty hand of Jove,
                                            You better let me
                                                                                            It was the sad story
                                            Use my lightening, like scissors,
                                                                                            How we became
                                            Like I cut the legs off the whales
                                                                                            Lonely two-legged creatures,
                                            And dinosaurs into lizards.”
                                                                                            It’s the story of
                                            Then he grabbed up some bolts
                                                                                            The origin of love.
                                            And he let out a laugh,
                                                                                            That’s the origin of love.
                                            Said, “I’ll split them right down the middle.
                                            Gonna cut them right up in half.”
                                            And then storm clouds gathered above
                                            Into great balls of fire

                                            And then fire shot down
                                            From the sky in bolts
                                            Like shining blades
                                            Of a knife.
                                            And it ripped
                                            Right through the flesh
                                            Of the children of the sun
                                            And the moon
                                            And the earth.

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