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JRW TRANSPORTS ON THE RISE

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					      The
Vol. LXXIV No.11                       thecowl.com
                                                                                               Cowl
                                                                                                  Providence College                                                         December 3, 2009




                                                              JRW TRANSPORTS
                                                                   ON THE RISE                                           by Valerie Ferdon ’12
                                                                                                                          Asst. News Editor
                                                                                                                               Alcohol

                                                                                                               According to Steven Sears, Ph.D., dean of
                                                                                                           Residence Life, it appears that the annual Junior
                                                                                                           Ring Weekend, has “become more about the
                                                                                                           dance and the formal rather than about the rings
                                                                                                           and celebrating the Providence College legacy.”
                                                                                                               Whatever the reason, students did celebrate
                                                                                                           the weekend of Nov. 13, although a few
                                                                                                           celebrated more than others.
                                                                                                               Seven individuals were transported by
                                                                                                           ambulance to Rhode Island Hospital over the
                                                                                                           course of JRW for being dangerously intoxicated.
                                                                                                           Two of those transported were guests of Providence
                                                                                                           College students who were asked to leave campus
                                                                                                           promptly after returning from the hospital. As
                                                                                                           for the PC students who were transported, letters
                                                                                                           were hand-delivered the following day informing
                                                                                                           them that they would not be allowed to attend the
                                                                                                           remaining JRW events.
                                                                                                               “Alcohol has always been an issue, and in fact is
                                                                                                           one of the main reasons that the event was moved
                                                                                                           on campus,” said Sharon Hay, dean of Student
                                                                                                           Programming. “Last year was the first year that
                                                                                                           the Friday night event was brought onto campus.”
                                                                                                               None of the transports, however, were from the
                                                                                                           Twin River Casino. All seven were transports from
                                                                                                           the PC campus, and five of those were directly
                                                                                                           from what students refer to as the “club night” in
                                                                                                           Peterson Recreation Center.
                                                                                                               “I do not have the statistics from last year but can
                                                                                                           tell you that seven is extremely high. One is too high,”
                                                                                                           said Hay.
                                                                                                               This year’s number was in fact higher than the
                                                                                                           2008 JRW, which had only four transports.
                                                                                                                                           TRANSPORTS / Page 6


You’ve Got Mail: All Bills Now Sent Electronically
       by Allison O’Connor ’10
              News Staff                     each time a new billing statement
                                             becomes available.
             Campus News                        The Bursar’s Office said the
                                             change is both efficient and practical
   The Bursar’s Office has introduced        for the College community. Students
a new electronic billing, or e-billing,      and designated family members can
system, which will replace the old           now view their bills securely from
billing method. Paper bills will no          any computer location and at any
longer be mailed to students. The            time of day.
electronic billing will serve as the            “The bill and other activity data is
official method of generating tuition        current and is available 24/7 on the
bills to all enrolled students.              Web, and right at your fingertips,
   Students        are    automatically      just like most bank information,”
registered for this service and can access   said Shine.
their tuition information through their         Now all student account information                                                                          DAN
                                                                                                                                                                   N IE T
                                                                                                                                                                            O ’11
                                                                                                                                                    IC B Y
online CyberFriar accounts. According        is easily accessible, including any                                                           GRAP
                                                                                                                                                H

to Kathleen Shine, Bursar, prior to the      charges, payments, and financial aid
implementation of e-billing this year,       information. Students and parents will
“bills were printed in house and mailed      be able to view and pay tuition bills,    their families to get information           Student Accounts or running up
via the U.S. Postal Service.”                and print a copy of current or prior      about their current financial situation     to the office to get data, no more
   Students and authorized users             billing statements, among other things.   immediately—no        more     waiting                           BILLING / Page 5
will now be notified via e-mail                 “It also really helps students and     for paper bills, no more calling up



INSIDEtheCOWL                                               Providence College’s Student-Run Newspaper Since 1935

                                  7
                                                                     CRAZY TAXI!
  World                                 Sports
  Roving                         10     Men’s Basketball:
  Commentary                     11     Friars escape with win
                                                                      Ben Bailey steps out of his cab and into
                                        over Northeastern.
  A&E                            16                                  Peterson for a raunchy night of stand up.
                                        Page 32
  Portfolio                      23                                                                     Page 16
  Sports                         27
2 The Cowl                                                                                          NEWS                                                                            December 3, 2009




 CampusGlances
             TOP: Fête Française sponsored
            Marie Antoinette Movie Night on
               Wednesday, Dec. 2, in Moore
                                     Hall III.

               LEFT: On Wednesday, Dec. 2,
           Amnesty International & Campus
                Ministry sponsored an AIDS
          Awareness Concert from 6:30-9:00
                          p.m. in McPhail’s.

                  RIGHT: A ribbon made out of
           popsicle sticks was featured outside
              of Aquinas Hall in honor of AIDS
                             Awareness Week.



                                                                                                                                                                                         SARA SPIRITO ’11 / THE COWL




                                                                              SARA SPIRITO ’11 / THE COWL                                                                                SARA SPIRITO ’11/ THE COWL




 CampusCalendar                                                                                                                                                        December 4-10

       Fri 4                        Sat 5                        Sun 6                           Mon 7                      Tues 8                          Wed 9                  Thurs 10
  6:30 p.m. Wine               2:00 p.m.                     2:00 p.m. Dance                7:00 p.m. PC                4:00 p.m.                     4:00 p.m.                   11:30 a.m. Things
  Tasting, Slavin              Meathead Ski                  Club Fall                      Men’s Basketball            Orientation                   Orientation                 for Thursday,
  Center                       Film, McPhail’s               Show, Angell                   v. Brown,                   Leader                        Leader                      Decorate a
                                                             Blackfriars                    Dunkin’ Donuts              Information                   Information                 Stocking, Ground
  8:00 p.m.                    2:30 p.m. Rejects             Theatre                        Center                      Session, Slavin               Session, Slavin             Level Slavin
  Blackfriars Dance            on the Rise                                                                              112                           112
  Concert, Angell              Comedy Show,                  2:00 p.m.                      8:00 p.m. Dance                                                                       5:45 p.m. Irish
  Blackfriars                  Aquinas Lounge                Symphonic                      Club Fall                   7:00 p.m. Advent              9:30 p.m.                   Dance Club
  Theatre                                                    Winds, Ryan                    Show, Angell                Penance Service,              Ultimate Fighter            Semester
                               8:00 p.m. Blackfriars         Concert Hall                   Blackfriars                 St. Dominic                   Showing,                    Spectacular, Angell
                               Dance Concert                                                Theatre                     Chapel                        McPhail’s                   Blackfriars Theatre


                                     The Cowl                                                                           Letter Policy                                    Accuracy Watch
                       Providence College’s Student Newspaper since 1935
                                                                                                                The Cowl welcomes guest commentaries         The Cowl is committed to accuracy and
                            Publisher: Rev. Brendan Murphy, O.P.                                            and letters to the editor from members of the    carefully checks every article that goes into
                                Advisor: Mr. Richard F. Kless
                                                                                                            Providence College community and outside         print to ensure that the facts are presented
                                                                                                            contributors.                                    clearly and truthfully. If you find an error in
 Editor-in-Chief: John Vaghi ’10                   Photography Editor: Sara Spirito ’11
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 Associate Editor-in-Chief: Katie Caliva ’10                                                                writer’s name, signature, a phone number,        at thecowl@providence.edu. Corrections will
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 Managing Editor: Matt Longobardi ’10              Katrina Davino ’10                                       be reached. Letters should be no more than
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 News Editor: Devin Murphy ’10                     Asst. Head Copy Editor: Lauren Cavalli ’11                                                                Contact The Cowl with advertising requests
 Asst. News Editor: Valerie Ferdon ’12                                                                      space permits. Guest commentaries should
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 World Editor: Jenny Arvanaghi ’10                                                                          one will be published per week. The Cowl         or, if necessary, via telephone at 401-865-
 Asst. World Editor: Sarah Laperriere ’11          Copy Editors: Mo Kroening ’10, Kate                      reserves the right to edit articles for space    2214. Visit www.thecowl.info for rates,
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 Commentary Editor: Maryclaire Dugre ’10           Ariana Tantillo ’11, Natalee Ambroze ’12,                                                                 about advertising with The Cowl.
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 Arts & Entertainment Editors:                                                                              publication.
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                                                                                                                Mail submissions to The Cowl, 1
 Catherine Northington ’12                                                                                                                                   is $30 per year. Send payment to The Cowl,
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                                                                                                                                                             Student subscription is included in tuition
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 Sports Editor: Dan Ollquist ’10                                                                                                                             fee; issues are available around campus on
                                                                                                            Cowl office in Slavin G05.
 Asst. Sports Editor: John Butler ’11                                                                                                                        Thursday nights.
December 3, 2009                                                               NEWS                                                                        The Cowl 3



Youth For Western Civ Proposed as Club
        by Ted DeNicola ’11               figures, editors of magazines, and         Island College Consortium that they             Bennett explained that the overall
            News Staff
                                          philosophers.”                             will soon be proposing to faculty.          process would start with students
                                             Dionisopoulos told Congress that           “Ideally, the program would              talking to their advisors and getting
          Student Congress                PC has the ability to host creative        involve cross registration with other       department chair approval if they
                                          and unique events, suggesting as           schools throughout Rhode Island,”           want to take classes for their majors
   On Tuesday, in the Student Congress
                                          a demonstration on the fall of the         said Bennett.                               off campus.
meeting, legislation for the proposed
                                          Berlin Wall.                                  Schools at which students would be           “We are having some problems
Youth for Western Civilization club
                                             “I do want to mention that I’ve         allowed to register for courses would       getting this approved for core classes
on campus sparked debate. Tim
                                          worked very hard with Chris Fortunato,     be Providence College, Rhode Island         right now,” said Bennett.
Dionisopoulos ’11 introduced his
                                          and he understands that we do fall in      College, Bryant University, University          Fitzgerald said students would pay
proposed this club.
                                          line with the mission statement of the     of Rhode Island, Johnson & Wales            PC for the courses which they would
   “It’s been a long time coming,” said
                                          school,” said Dionisopoulos. “He didn’t    University, Rhode Island School of          be taking at other campuses. “You are
Dionisopoulos. “I’ve been working
                                          seem to have any problem with this club.   Design, and possibly Roger Williams         still attending PC and are still getting
with Congress for about eight months.
                                          There is simply a delay because of the     University and Salve Regina University.     credit at PC,” said Fitzgerald.
I started YWC primarily because I’ve
                                          formal process involved. There was a lot      Bennett said that including Brown            Students will be responsible for
worked in the political game for two
                                          of nervousness that we weren’t obeying     University may be a challenge, as they      continuing to attend classes they
years after I got out of high school. I
                                          the rules and that something was out of    are heavily involved with other Ivy         are taking at other schools if PC’s
was getting sick of campaigning and
                                          line, but that’s been hammered out and     League institutions.                        scheduled breaks do not match
working on policy initiatives and
                                          there aren’t really any more problems in      “We will have to go through a lot of     those of the other school. If a student
instead wanted to focus on something
                                          regard to that.”                           red tape to get there,” said Bennett.       intends to skip a class due to a break
different. I saw a tendency within the
                                             Members of Congress were                   The program would only be open           he or she must obtain permission
right wing political sphere to give
                                          concerned because the YWC Web site         to juniors and seniors in its beginning     from the course instructor at the
way toward, well, I don’t want to call
                                          cited Providence College as an official    stages, as underclassmen must remain        other institution.
them uneducated, but very knee-
                                          member of the club. Dionisopoulos          on campus for the duration of the week          “There are many advantages to this
jerk reactionary responses to a lot of
                                          responded in defense.                      to take their Development of Western        program,” said Bennet. “They include
complex issues.”
                                             “We assume that we will                 Civilization courses. The program           the diversity of curriculum aspect in
   Dionisopoulos informed Congress
                                          officially be an organized club,”          would allow one course per student to       which students can take advantage of
that Youth for Western Civilization
                                          said Dionisopoulos. “The delay is a        start because of a lack of physical space   course opportunities elsewhere that
would help to form a philosophical
                                          mere formality. If you really want to      on campuses.                                aren’t offered here.”
solution for current issues. He said
                                          get down to the legal ramifications           Fitzgerald explained that living on          Fitzgerald     added     that    the
he wants to retain a Western identity.
                                          of using the Providence College            a different campus would not inhibit        consortium will bring Rhode Island
   “The way we are different from
                                          name you’d probably have to hire           students’ abilities to do work for their    colleges together.
College Republicans and a lot of
                                          a lawyer and take me to court and          classes at other schools.                       “Our     hope      is   that    this
other conservative organizations on
                                          sue me. If you’d like to do that feel         “Students from each institution would    consortium will encourage cross
campus is that we wouldn’t focus
                                          free. I’ve alerted to Student Congress     have access to the other institutions’      communication between students
on political figures, candidates,
                                          everything I’ve done for the past          online resources,” said Fitzgerald.         from these different colleges,” said
or issues but topics such as
                                          eight months. We aren’t working               Participation requirements would         Fitzgerald. “So many JWU and RIC
globalization and mass migration,”
                                          behind closed doors.”                      include maintaining a minimum               students live in the surrounding
said Dionisopoulos. “I feel that
                                             The meeting adjourned without a         GPA calculated by PC. Students must         neighborhood, so it would be
these things should be discussed
                                          vote on the future proposed club.          also adhere to the academic policies        convenient for them to take some
and intellectual debate should be
                                             Megan Bennett ’10, chair of             issued by the institution offering          of their classes here.”
fostered. The only way to do this
                                          Academics, and Tom Fitzgerald,             each class.
is to engage people and to bring
                                          Class of 2011 representative, informed        “You can’t just take a class at CCRI
in nationally recognized political
                                          Congress of the proposed Rhode             and get an easy A,” said Fitzgerald.
4 The Cowl                                                                        NEWS                                                                       December 3, 2009



SHEPARD Sponsors Free HIV Testing
        by Devin Murphy ’10               8:00 p.m. on Tuesday, Dec. 1. Tuesday        which the body produces if a person           a male or a female; and the gender of
            News Editor                   marked the first time that free HIV          is HIV positive. If the person tests          person being tested.
                                          testing has been offered on campus           positive for the virus, two red lines will        Students attended the free testing
               Health                     since 2006.                                  appear on the test.                           to show their support for those who
                                             “The Health Center does do [free             It takes the body approximately            are infected with the virus, and to help
   In honor of World AIDS Day,            HIV testing],” said Anderson. “It’s          three months to begin producing               show the importance of being tested
SHEPARD sponsored free HIV testing        just not very well publicized, and they      antibodies which would indicate that a        for HIV.
by AIDS Care Ocean State. Originally      have been very overrun with swine flu        person is HIV positive. An HIV test is            “I guess I assumed I’m not [HIV]
there was confusion about whether or      so they couldn’t run it.”                    an accurate test of what a person’s HIV       positive, but I guess you never know.”
not AIDS Care Ocean State would be           The Center for Disease Control            status was three months before he or          said Katrina Lipinsky ’12. “It’s a lot
allowed on campus for free testing.       recommends that sexually active              she took the test.                            easier to go through it in solidarity.”
It is a standard practice for the         people and people at risk of                    Anyone who believes that they may              Lipinsky said that the technician



                                          “
organization to discuss the best ways                                                                                                who performed her test was very nice
for people to protect themselves from        IF YOU SEE MORE PEOPLE [GETTING TESTED] IT                                              and made her feel comfortable.



                                                                                                                        ”
contracting the HIV virus while testing   MAKES IT MUCH LESS INTIMIDATING TO DO IT...                                                    “A      student      from    Brown
them. In their discussions, volunteer                                                                                                did the testing,” she said.
technicians usually explain that the                                                                                                 “It was more personal and friendly
best way to prevent contracting the       contracting the virus be tested at           have come in contact with the virus           to have someone in our age group
HIV virus from sexual intercourse         least once each year.                        less than three months before the test is     and someone from the area.”
or contact is to use protection in the       “We’ll hopefully make it an annual        encouraged to be tested again as soon             Lipinsky said that the test was not
form of a condom. The organization        thing,” said Anderson.                       as possible.                                  painful or difficult.
refrained from talking about the use         He      is    hopeful     that    other      While waiting for the results of the           “It’s quick,” she said.
of protection such as condoms in their    organizations such as Amnesty                test, the technician asks the person a            Other students echoed Lipinsky’s
discussions with students so as not to    International will also sponsor free         series of questions about their sexual        sentiment that it is easier to get tested
violate Providence College’s mission      testing in the future.                       habits, drug use, and sexual orientation      with a group of people.
of upholding Catholic moral values.          Before being tested, each person          as required by the Department of                  “If you see more people doing it, it
   Jeff Anderson ’11 helped SHEPARD       was required to sign a release form          Health. If any question makes the             makes it much less intimidating to do
organize the event as part of a Black     detailing steps that would need to be        person uncomfortable, he or she does          it,” said Brian Gay ’11.
studies course in which he is enrolled.   taken if he or she tested HIV positive.      not have to answer the question.                  In addition to free HIV testing, a
   “Being a Catholic institution, you        Each test only takes about 15 to             The questions which the technicians        red ribbon was constructed between
have to be sensitive to Catholic moral    20 minutes and requires only a small         ask include if the person being tested        Aquinas Hall and Moore Hall for
values,” said Anderson. “You can’t        amount of blood from a finger prick.         has had sexual contact or intercourse         World AIDS Day. A presentation
talk about condoms or birth control or    The blood is then inserted into a test       with anyone who has tested positive           entitled “The Personal Face of AIDS”
anything like that.”                      strip. First, a control test is done to be   for the HIV or AIDS virus. Other              was also held in Feinstein Academic
     Confidential free testing was        sure that the test strip is functioning      questions include if the person has           Center on Dec. 1.
offered in the SHEPARD office and the     correctly. If the control works correctly    had vaginal, anal, or oral sex within
Women Will office from 6:00 p.m. to       then the blood is tested for antibodies      the past year; if the person identifies as




                                                                                                                         register
                                                                                                                           now!
              Enroll in Winter Session 2010.                                                                           Visit SCE, Harkins 102.




                                                                                                                  www.providence.edu/sce

                          two week winter session                                       one week winter session
                          January 4 - 15 (Monday - Friday, 6 - 10 p.m.)                 January 11 - 15 (Monday - Friday, 8 a.m. - 4:30 p.m.)
                          art 104 Asian Art • biology 121 Environmental Biology         art 271 America through the Camera’s Eye • english 194 Science Fiction
                          history 345 History of Modern Middle East • law 102           fire science 204 Firefighting Tactics III • history 422 Russian History II
                          Basic Criminal Law • philosophy 306 Business Ethics           theology 270 Growth in Christian Life • theology 322 Synoptic Gospels
December 3, 2009                                                                     NEWS                                                                             The Cowl 5

New Peer Education   Harper Makes“Melodious”
                            Addition to
Program Added to VASE Department of Music
       by Meghan Conway ’12                   and this is why it’s important                      by Maxwell Kravitz ’12
            News Staff                        for students to have the training                        News Staff
                                              to educate their peers on sexual
              campus news                     assault and dating violence.”                           Featured Teacher
                                                 Twelve people, the majority of them
   Plans are currently underway               women, have signed up for the peer              For Professor Todd J. Harper,
for a sexual assault peer education           education program. Marasco would             Ph.D., D.M.A., “there is nothing more
training program to be offered                like to see more male students get           valuable than working with people.”
to students in Jan. 2010. Kendra              involved in the program.                     Harper is a first-year professor in the
Marasco ’87 encourages anyone                    “It is important that men be educated     Department of Music, specializing in
interested in becoming a peer                 on sexual assault and dating violence        voice and choral activities.
educator to take part in a four-hour          as well as women,” said Marasco.                Harper grew up in New Jersey, but
training session in which he/she              “Men need to hold men accountable.”          spent the last 20 years in California.
will be educated on topics of sexual             As part of a gender action project        He received his doctorate from the
assault, dating violence, and the best        for his women’s studies course, Ryan         University of South Carolina.
ways to educate others. Trained peer          Alescio ’10 has decided to help promote         “USC is everything you pay for,”
educators will eventually attend hall         the new peer education program,              Harper said with a smile. “A great
meetings to discuss these issues with         specifically to the male population at       education indeed.”
RAs and students.                             Providence College.                             Harper stresses that music with
   “Peer educators should be equipped            “I plan on going through the peer         melody is undoubtedly his favorite type.
with the knowledge, facts, and myths          education training and then I hope to           “I try to avoid popular music,” he                                  SARA SPIRITO ’11/ THE COWL
about sexual assault and dating violence      speak in some of the all-male freshman       said. “I have been listening to classical   Todd J Harper, Ph.D., Department of Music.
so they can answer questions from             dorms to try to spark some interest in       music since the age of six.”
students,” said Marasco. “The more            the issue and get them involved in the          Harper      has    many      favorite    arrived. The relationship between the
students trained as peer educators, the       peer education program.”                     composers, but Johannes Brahms,             faculty and student body made the
better off this campus will be.”                 Alescio is a secondary education          Tomás Luis de Victoria, and Josquin         transaction comfortable,” he said.
   The initial plans for the peer             major and believes that as a future          Des Prez are his favorites. His respect        Harper feels that it is important
education       program    have     been      teacher and a male, it is important          for music and melody has inspired           to be comfortable in the teaching
approved by Rev. Brendan Murphy,              to be educated on sexual assault and         him to practice instruments such            environment. It is the welfare of
O.P., vice president of Student Affairs       dating violence.                             as trumpet and piano. He respects           the students that professors are
Administration, and will be finalized            “Being aware and trained as a             all genres of music, but strongly           responsible for, and Harper insists that
in the near future.                           peer educator will help me as a              considers the harmonic balance of           the professor must be as motivated as
   Prior to the establishment of the          teacher, because I will eventually be        consonance and dissonance to be most        the students for progression.
peer education program, Marasco               working with students who are of             intriguing. He feels that good melody          Surprisingly, teaching was not
assembled a new organization                  the ages that are greatly impacted by        yields good music.                          always the motivation for Harper.
at Providence College; Victim                 sexual assault.”                                Although        dedicated        and        “As long as I was working with
Advocacy Support and Education                   Alescio became inspired by sexual         passionate in respect to music,             people, I was content,” he said.
[VASE]. VASE serves as a resource             assault and dating violence advocacy at      Harper is also a skilled soccer                Harper always considered careers
for students who are seeking                  a sexual assault workshop he attended        player. He was a part of the Olympic        in psychology and counseling. As
information and support regarding             this summer as an orientation leader.        Development Program, and was                many undergraduates can relate, he
sexual assault and dating violence.              “Sexual assault and dating violence       All State as both a star sweeper            rapidly changed majors. He decided to
   “VASE allows for students to give          do affect men,” said Alescio. “They          and striker. Harper had dreams of           stick with voice, and began performing
consent before being contacted by             can be assaulted, they can be dating a       escalating his game to a professional       and expanding his process of learning.
us,” said Marasco. “People should feel        victim, and they have many females in        level, but numerous injuries put a          He always enjoyed being active,
personally empowered about sexual             their lives.”                                damper on his big plans.                    participating and cooperating in
assault or dating violence—this is why           As part of his project, Alescio is           He also enjoys nature with his wife      groups which eventually would lead
V.A.S.E. only contacts students if they       assisting Marasco in recruiting men for      when taking a break from music.             him to a career in teaching.
want to be contacted. Students are free,      the peer education training program             Harper      considers     Providence        Harper has found a good fit at PC.
however, to contact VASE anytime              in addition to spreading awareness on        College to be a tremendous working             is “It is everything I expected and
they would like.”                             sexual assault and dating violence in        environment.                                more,” he said. “Whether my students
   Marasco hopes the addition of the          other ways on campus.                           “The dedication by the faculty and       are music majors or not, every day is a
peer education program to the VASE               “My main goal is to get more males        students to the priority is admirable,”     joy with these kids.”
organization will further assist in           to come out for the peer education           he said passionately. “I not only teach        Although it can be intimidating
preventing sexual assault and dating          training, but I also think it would          here, but also learn from my students       coming into a new environment,
violence at the College.                      be great if guys could come out for          each and every day.”                        Harper is very thankful of the support
   “The more comfortable students             events like ‘Take Back the Night’ so            Whether it is teaching private           from the faculty and the cheer of the
are talking about the issue, the              they can become aware of the fact            lessons or conducting the choir, Harper     Music Department.
less it will happen,” said Marasco.           that sexual assault is real and needs        feels the Music Department offers a            The perception of music for Harper’s
“Friends will go to friends more              to be stopped.”                              depth of truth.                             students lives vicariously through
likely than they will go to authority,                                                        “Everything felt so real when I          “ability, kindness, and hard work.”



BILLING: New System Will Save Money
Continued from front page                        For the most part, however, the              From the administration standpoint,      processing and bill distribution.
                                              transition to e-billing has not posed        e-billing was instantly accepted as a       Keeping costs as low as possible is
confusion about whether the student           any major problems.                          vital tool to implement at PC.              very important to PC,” Shine said.
sent financial information to the                “Most of the reaction has been               “The change was presented to the         “We don’t want added expense to
parent and is the data current,”              very positive,” said Shine. “Many            vice president of finance [Michael          be passed on to our students in
said Shine.                                   students and parents have been asking        Frazier] and was approved based on          increased fees.”
   In order to authorize a parent or          to receive bills online in the past few      the tremendous value it represented            With a built-in system of checks and
guardian to receive notification of           years, and it is great that we can now       to students and their families, and the     balances, the e-billing process ensures
billing statements, students must             accommodate them.”                           practically zero cost to PC; the product    that no mistakes are made.
simply log on to their CyberFriar                Students have been made aware of          practically sold itself,” Shine said.          “No e-mails are sent until we
accounts and designate a parent               the recent change. Letters were mailed          The electronic billing is                approve them first,” said Shine.
or     guardian’s      username        and    out to parents, and an e-mail was sent       environmentally friendly as well.              The system has also been tested
e-mail address. An e-mail will                to all students to inform them of these      Paper usage will be drastically             throughout the past six months in
subsequently be sent to that parent           changes and of the actions to take to view   reduced, and it is cost effective for       order to guarantee a smooth transition.
or guardian notifying them that an            bills online and to allow others to access   the College due to its reduction               “I think that it will be a much more
account has been established, and             their accounts. Information was also         in postage costs. “From a purely            efficient system than paper billing if
will provide them with a link to the          presented to both incoming students          environmental standpoint, I think it’s      people keep up with it,” said Amanda
e-bill web site. Information remains          and their parents at the new student         a great thing, and I think everyone’s       Zefi ’11. “But sometimes paper can be
confidential and secure. Only a               orientations prior to the beginning of the   capable of using a computer at              a better reminder.”
student or authorized user may                academic year.                               this point, so why not support the             Although the bill won’t be physically
access any account information.                  “We also had posters made and             switch?” said Jessica Crawford ’10,         sent to the student or parent/guardian, he
   “I think this will be fiscally efficient   put up around campus to remind               of the e-bills.                             or she can print a paper copy of the e-bill
for the school, but some parents are not      students of the change,” said                   No checks, envelopes, or stamps are      account thus accommodating this issue.
technically savvy and this could cause        Shine.      “We have also updated            necessary to make a payment.                An e-mail reminder will also be sent as a
a host of problems on an individual           our Web site with information on                “E-billing helps keep the College’s      notification for upcoming bills.
level,” said Jessica Pepin ’10.               the process.”                                costs down as we eliminate paper
6 The Cowl                                                                                                   NEWS                                                                    December 3, 2009



TRANSPORTS:                                                                                                    Class Raises Money for
EMTs Assessed                                                                                                  Hurricane Katrina Victims
                                                                                                                        by Kaitlyn Monast ’13                    Kelly Johnson ’13 agreed, feeling the



Student Sobriety
                                                                                                                           Associate Editor                   film helped show a different side to the
                                                                                                                                                              story many have not already heard.
                                                                                                                             Campus News                         “Before [Hurricane Katrina
                                                                                                                                                              Awareness Night] I just saw what
                                                                                                                                                              everyone else saw on the news, which
                                                                                                                   Hurricane Katrina Awareness Night,         was not first hand,” she said. “The film
                                                         vomiting is also a sign that they may                 sponsored by the Hurricane Katrina             helped you see how individuals, not
Continued from front page                                                                                                                                     just the group, was affected.”
                                                         need medical attention.                               Anatomy of a Disaster sociology class,
                                                            “We don’t know how much you’ve                     raised over $100 for the victims of the           The sociology class used the movie
    “The number of transports has been                   had to drink,” said Kanadanian. “Your                 disaster. The class will continue to have      to raise awareness and accept donations
high for the past four to five years,”                   alcohol level could be rising, so we try              fundraising events throughout the year.        for Common Ground Relief. Common
said Sears. “This is why we have                         to make an assumption of where you                    The class screened the documentary             Ground Relief is a nonprofit organization
formulated a more in-depth evaluation                    are at. We may have you sit for 10 or                 Trouble in the Water, which features           that has helped aid thousands of people
process. We also staggered the arrival                   15 minutes to see where you are going.                Hurricane Katrina survivor Kimberley           affected by Hurricane Katrina solely
times in order to pay more attention to                  If you tend to get worse we may send                  Rivers Roberts and the story of one            through volunteers and donations.
the condition of the students.”                          you off to the hospital. If you do not get            community on its journey during                Common Ground Relief has begun to
    There were also letters given to                     any worse and you answer questions                    and after Katrina. In the film, Roberts        help the community of the lower Ninth
students with information about                          appropriately, we may tell you just to                raises awareness about the brutality of        Ward, where 45 percent of the population
expectations for the event. It talked                    go back to your room.”                                Hurricane Katrina and the insufficient         of New Orleans lived, rebuilding
about the importance of arriving on                         After consulting the EMTs, it                      relief provided by the United States           homes and furnishing them as well as
time, the privilege to attend the event,                 was members of the SAIL Office                        government. It also served as a                opening other free services. Common
and the alcohol policy.                                  staff who made the decision about                     fundraising event.                             Ground Relief has established health
    Twelve security officers, four EMTs,                 whether or not each student could                         The class is dedicated to the study        and women’s clinic, free legal services, a
one fire marshal, two police officers,                   go back to the event.                                 of the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina.         farming coalition, counseling, and a job
and seven staff members were present                        Kanadanian was also present at                     Students learn about the government’s          training program.
at the Friday event. This is the standard                JRW last year, and while he said                      efforts, the community organizations, and         While many who lived in the New
security for a large event.                              the alcohol problem was about the                     every other aspect of the hurricane. At        Orleans community want to return,
    Koren Kanadanian, director of                        same both years, there is growing                     the end of the year the class is required to   they have been unable to due to
Emergency Management, explained                          concern within the administration                     put on a service project. The class created    insufficient assistance. The government
that while security patted down                          that could lead to reforms in the                     “Hurricane Katrina Awareness Night” as         created an organization called Road



“
                                                                                                               part of the course.                            Home which was only applicable
    THE NUMBER OF MEDICAL TRANSPORTS HAS BEEN                                                                      “We decided to show a movie                until 2007 and allocated a supposed $6



                                                                                                   ”
                                                                                                               because a lot of people did not know           million, although many have not seen
HIGH FOR THE PAST FOUR TO FIVE YEARS.                                                                                                                         a penny.
                                                                                                               about what the true effects of Katrina
                                                                                                               are,” Lovelyn Bogle ’10 said. “They               “We felt the government failed the
students entering the event, one or                      traditional weekend.                                  still think that the government took           citizens in numerous ways—not only
two were asked to leave the event due                       “Looking at the last two years, there              care of it.”                                   are the homes not being rebuilt but
to attempting to sneak alcohol into                      is definitely the feeling that it needs to                The class decided to show Trouble in       they are not being allowed to come
Peterson. The personnel also observed                    change. JRW cannot focus on alcohol,                  the Water because it shows the aftermath       back,” Bogle said. “There is massive
the students’ behavior, and nine                         and if it continues, I think it is going              of the storm when the government was           devastation and the government is not
students were pulled out of the line to                  to be a detriment to JRW. The whole                   supposed to be helping rebuild New             doing anything.”
be evaluated by EMTs.                                    culture has to change,” said Kanandian.               Orleans. The documentary exposes                  While the government was not
   “We were looking to see if                               Hay agreed and expressed how the                   the lack of government aid that the            helping, Bogle felt little things like
anyone was stumbling, if they were                       true meaning of the longstanding PC                   community was offered. The film shows          the awareness night can help raise
talking loudly, if they were acting                      tradition has been lost in recent years.              scenes from the delayed rescue, the            awareness and help give back to the
inappropriately,” said Kanadanian.                          “I do expect for there to be                       deceased still in houses two weeks later,      community what was lost.
“If they were, someone from Security,                    changes next year, but it is too soon                 hospitals not being evacuated, Army               “Courses like this inspire students
the SAIL Office, or Student Affairs                      to know what those changes will                       officials threatening to shoot people, and     to do something, but after this class
pulled them aside and asked them                         be,” said Hay. “Junior Ring Weekend                   the superficial plans to rebuild the rich      what is next?” Bogle said. “Unless we
to have an evaluation done with the                      was established to celebrate the                      side of New Orleans, but not the part of       are shown, we do not know. A lot of it
EMTs. The EMTs then determined if                        distribution of class rings and                       the city where most families lived.            is ignorance, but we continue to raise
they had been drinking alcohol, if they                  to strengthen class unity. Sadly,                         “This really put a face on Hurricane       money. It is important to give to these
could go to the event or needed to go                    for many students, the meaning                        Katrina to a level we can relate to, to see    people some of what they lost.”
back to their room, or if they were so                   behind JRW has been lost. I must                      how individuals were truly devastated             Kelly felt that the awareness night
intoxicated that they needed to seek                     commend this year’s Junior Ring                       by the hurricane,” Lauren Kelly ’13            was very moving, and successful in
medical treatment.”                                      Weekend Core for striving to put                      said. “Unfortunately, it got to the point      its goals.
   EMTs determined the severity of a                     the ‘ring’ back in JRW. Their theme,                  where people felt their hands were tied,          “Things like this make me more
students’ intoxication by asking them                    ‘reignite the tradition,’ spoke to this               when in fact they probably could have          motivated to see how I can help,”
particular questions such as the date,                   goal. Much work still needs to be                     done a little more to try and evacuate         Kelly said. “Also, seeing actual footage
time, and their current location. Low                    done in bringing the true meaning                     New Orleans. I think this film shed light      is mind-blowing and really powerful
blood pressure, high heart rate, or                      back to this event.”                                  on that.”                                      and emotional.”




                                                                                                                                               Add a little Merry to your Christmas Holiday
                                                                                                                                                 season with a fresh new look. Danielle’s
     
                                                                                                                                               cuts are very trendy, fun and flirty. Just what
              
                                                                                                                                              every woman wants. Turn heads this holiday
                                             
                                                                                                                                                            season and Danielle.
                          
                         
             
                                               
     •   
     •   
         
         
     •   
         
     •   
     •   
     •   
         
         
                             
                                 


                                                                                                               ALL GIFT CERTIFICATES
                                                                                                                 FOR NEW CLIENTS
                                                                                                                ARE 50% OFF FOR THE
                        World
Speculation of Bush Administration’s Failure
                                                                                                                                                                                       Page 7
                                                                                                                                                                         December 3, 2009




       by Arman Oganisian ’13
            World Staff

              United States

      On Sunday, Nov. 29, the
democratic staff of the Senate Foreign
Relations committee released a report
that cast the blame for the current
situation in Afghanistan on the
Bush administration. As reported
by CNN, President Barack Obama is
to announce his decision to approve
military requests for more troops at
West Point, N.Y. Obama will commit
40,000 troops in all; 30,000 of these
troops are to be U.S. and the remaining
10,000 are to be troops from various
NATO countries.
   Tora Bora, or “Black Dust” in
Arabic, is a cave complex which is part
of the White Mountains in eastern
Afghanistan, near the Khyber Pass. In
Dec. 2001, the United States believed
that they might have had Osama Bin
Laden cornered at the cave complex.
His only option was to escape through
the Khyber Pass and into Pakistan.                                                                                                                                                   GETTY IMAGES
The decision to sweep in and take the         President Barack Obama decides to send an additional 30,000 troops to Afghanistan. There has been sharp disagreement among members of both
complex was not approved by the U.S.          parties, including Obama’s own party, indicating potential political trouble for the president.
command. “Requests were also turned
down for U.S. troops to block the             critic of Bush’s handling of the war               region.” This, therefore, necessitates             decisions that were made eight years
mountain paths leading to sanctuary           in Afghanistan.                                    Obama’s decision to send more                      earlier made the situation much more
a few miles away in Pakistan,” states            As a presidential nominee in 2004,              troops into the region.                            difficult” today. The committee report
the report released by the Foreign            he said that Bush “took his eye off the               Senator    Richard     Lugar    (R-             called the failure at Tora Bora “a lost
Relations committee.                          ball” in Afghanistan to invade Iraq,               Indiana) told CNN that the report                  opportunity that forever altered the
   The Bush Administration at the             reports CNN.                                       “does serve as a convenient way                    course of the conflict in Afghanistan.”
time did not know for sure that                  The report released by the Foreign              for, perhaps, Democrats to say once                   Lugar later commented, according
Bin Laden was there, according to             Relations Kerry’s committee stated                 again, there’s another failing of the              to CNN, that “the problem right now
CNN. Ultimately, Tora Bora ended              that the “inability to finish the job in           past administration and that all                   is, what do we do presently? What
with Bin Laden’s escape to Pakistan           late 2001 has contributed to a conflict            the problems have accumulated.”                    will the president’s plan be? How
by way of the Khyber Pass. Senator            today that endangers not just our                  Republicans see this as yet another                much confidence do we have in this
John Kerry (D-Mass.), the chairman            troops and those of our allies, but                blame game maneuver. Democrats                     president and this plan?”
of the committee, had always been a           the stability of a volatile and vital              complain that “the culmination of



     Somalia: Considered The Worst Country in 2010
        by Molly Driessen ’12                                                                                                                       and other countries promise aid but
            World Staff                                                                                                                             remain hesitant to do so, given the dire
                                                                                                                                                    conditions and lack of security offered.
                 Somalia                                                                                                                            Aid workers, who have managed to
                                                                                                                                                    remain, face immense difficulties
                                                                                                                                                    providing the camps with sufficient
   According to “The World in 2010,”                                                                                                                water, food, and medical supplies. All
printed by The Economist, Somalia is                                                                                                                Somalians face the struggle to survive,
“the worst country on the Earth.” The                                                                                                               and the life expectancy in the nation is
World in 2010 is an annual edition put                                                                                                              only 50 years. Other statistics are too
out by the Economist Intelligence Unit,                                                                                                             drastic for most organizations to keep
a sister company of The Economist.                                                                                                                  accurate recordings, including the
Each year they choose the worst                                                                                                                     C.I.A. World Factbook. According to
country for the upcoming year. Past                                                                                                                 the U.N.’s World Food Programme and
“winners” have included Afghanistan                                                                                                                 the Economist, “more than 40 percent of
and Turkmenistan.                                                                                                                         REUTERS
                                                                                                                                                    the population [in Somalia] need food
   According to an article written by         Somalia is considered the worst country in 2010 according to The Economist. In previous years, this
                                              title has gone to countries such as Afghanistan and Turkmenistan.                                     aid to survive, and one in every five
Jeffrey Gettleman from The New York                                                                                                                 children is acutely malnourished.”
Times in 2007, “Top United Nations            government since 1991. Rival battles               also continually at risk from various                 The Economist even went so far as
officials who specialize in Somalia said      between      competing      government             factions both on land and at sea.                  to say, “calling Somalia a country
the country had higher malnutrition           factions and warlords, disease, and                Somalians traveling for work or leisure            is a stretch.” According to The New
rates, more current bloodshed, and            famine have contributed to more than               are highly cautioned, due to the high              York Times, about 5,000 African Union
fewer aid workers than Darfur.”               1 million deaths, according to BBC.                risk of piracy and robbery. While the              peacekeeping forces, which guard
Similarly, in Dec. 2008, the BBC                 Somalia is in the process of forming            government has put forth several naval             the presidential palace, protect the
quoted the United Nations envoy to            a transitional governing institution,              ships and anti-piracy laws, the pirates            government in Somalia.
Somalia, Ahmedou Ould Abdallah,               which is called the Transitional Federal           continue to move about and hold                       Another difficulty is that the
saying, “There is a hidden genocide           Government. In Feb. 2009, Sheik Sharif             passengers for ransom. Regardless of               government has two radical Islamic
in Somalia which has sacrificed               Sheik Ahmed, who used to be a high                 these laws, Somalia continues to breed             groups, Al-Shabab and Hizbul Islam, that
entire generations.”                          school teacher, became the president               piracy because of its geographical                 continually fight for the government’s
   Somalia is a relatively young              and has hope for stability. The United             location. Somalia is situated on the               loyalty. The U.S. Government recognizes
country. It gained independence in            States supported this vision of hope by            east coast of Africa and next to it is             Al-Shabab to be an al-Qaeda ally, after
1960 and ratified its constitution in 1979.   sending 40 tons of weapons to Somalia              the Gulf of Aden, which is a dominant              they assumed responsibility for the
Since then the Somalian government            to aid Sheik Sharif’s government.                  shipping passage. From The Economist,              bombings in September of 2009 that killed
has been under various battling                  Disunification swarms the country,              the International Maritime Bureau has              17 peacekeepers. The U.S. Department
political groups, who have maintained         as two areas of Somalia have claimed               so far recorded 31 successful hijacks in           of State warns all U.S. citizens from
control with minimal stability. Both          self-independence. These include the               the first half of 2009.                            traveling to Somalia. According to the U.S.
the U.N. and the Kenyan government            Republic of Somaliland and the semi-                  The turmoil in Somalia can be seen              Department of State’s Web site, “There is
have attempted to help create a more          autonomous State of Puntland. With                 in the drastic increase in refugees, since         no U.S. Embassy or other U.S. diplomatic
stable Somalian government but have           stretched resources, little income, and            civil war began in 1988. According to              presence in Somalia. Consequently, the
achieved little success. According to         many fighting factions, the Somalian               the C.I.A. World Factbook, Somalia has             U.S. government is not in a position to
the C.I.A. World Factbook, Somalia            Government remains unable to unify                 about 1.5 million IDPs, many of whom               assist or effectively provide services to
has not had a permanent national              its country. Somalian citizens are                 live in horrifying camps. The U.N.                 U.S. citizens in Somalia.”
8 The Cowl                                                                            WORLD                                                                             December 3, 2009



Copenhagen Summit to Impact Global Health
       by Sarah Laperriere ’11
         Asst. World Editor
               Denmark

   On Dec. 7, the United Nations will
host a climate change summit in
Copenhagen to succeed the 1997 Kyoto
Protocol. This summit will try to lower
the global emission of greenhouse
gases, increase global development,
and increase global health, said
Sir Andrew Haines, a professor at
the London School of Hygiene and
Tropical Medicine.
   The policies being established at
the summit will have a direct impact
on global health. Recent articles in
medical journals suggest that global
health should play a role in the
upcoming climate discussion.
   Dr. Margaret Chan, director of the
World Health Organization, said, “As
this series shows, cutting greenhouse
gas emissions can represent a mutually
reinforcing opportunity to reduce
climate change and improve public
health.”
   There are a number of changes that
can be implemented to increase global
health. More low carbon transport
systems should be employed such as
cycling or walking, as such changes                                                                                                                                                           AP

would reduce pollution and physical          Danish Minister for Climate and Energy Connie Hedegaard with Head of the U.N. Climate Change Secretary Yvo de Boer, at the start of a two-day
inactivity, reports the BBC.                 closed meeting of climate negotiators from nearly 4o countries.
   Reducing the amount of livestock
and meat consumption would also             30 percent to have a positive impact              effects on children. Decreasing fossil            pollutants can damage the heart and
improve people’s health by lowering         on climate change, meaning a lower                fuel dependent electricity will also              lungs of those people affected.
the ingestion of saturated fats and         consumption of meat and farming,                  lower pollution and therefore decrease               This December, 192 of the worlds
lowering the emission of greenhouse         according to the BBC.                             the number of premature deaths due                leading nations will take part in the
gases in to the atmosphere.                    Low emission stoves should also                to heart and lung damage, according               Copenhagen Summit to try and slow
    Agriculture is responsible for 10 to    be used in low-income houses instead              to the BBC. Professor Kirk Smith of               down the effects humans are having on
12 percent of global greenhouse gas         of burning fuels indoors. This switch             the School of Public Heath at the                 global warming. This summit is by no
emissions. Accordingly, agricultural        would decrease pollution within                   University of California published                means a final solution: “Copenhagen is
production should be reduced by             homes, and decrease the negative                  a study concluding that greenhouse                a beginning, not the end,” said Haines.




   Black Friday Turnout Better Than Expected
       by Jenny Arvanaghi ’10               pushed for price cuts reported bigger
            World Editor                    crowds for the early morning bargains
                                            compared to last year. Spokespeople
             United States                  for Target Corp. and Wal-Mart Stores
                                            Inc., also said they were pleased with
                                            the shopper turnout.
   One of the biggest days for retailers,      According to CBS News, the most
Black Friday, turned out to be a success    popular products were consumer
this year. According to CNN, retailers      electronics, including flat-screen TVs,
registered about $10.66 billion in sales    digital cameras, digital frames, and
this past Friday, Nov. 27, up 0.5 percent   laptops. In toys, there were many big
from last year’s numbers, despite the       hits, including video games such as
economic recession. Regionally, sales       “Guitar Hero III,” and toys related to
rose 4.7 percent in the West, 1.3 percent   Walt Disney Co’s “Hannah Montana.”
in the Midwest, and 0.6 percent in the         Spokespeople for J.C. Penney said
South, but declined 4.9 percent in the      Saturday that sales were strong at their
Northeast.                                  stores across the country. Top sellers
   Black Friday gets its name because       for their stores included gemstone and
it traditionally marks the day of the       gold jewelry, luggage sets, women’s
year when retailers finally move out        cashmere-blend pea coats, and a
of the red, indicating losses, and          device that projects TV images onto a
into the black, representing profits.       blank wall, according to CNN.
Despite the hype of Black Friday, this         Also, Internet retailing had a strong
is not the busiest shopping day of the      turnout. The average online order on                                                                                                              AP
year; that day is usually the Saturday      Black Friday rose 35 percent from last
before Christmas. Yet for retailers,        year, to $170.19, according to online            Black Friday shoppers at a store looking at GPS devices that are on sale. Despite the economic
both November and December are              retail analyst Coremetrics. “The                 recession, sales were greater this year than last year.
critical sales months, because during       healthy jump in the average amount
this period sales can account for half      of money people are willing to spend                Wal-Mart, where one worker died                 sales continue through the holiday
or more of the profits for the full year.   online this year suggests consumers              last year on Black Friday, stated that             season. This is during a time when
   Many shoppers jammed malls               have adjusted their shopping patterns            the day passed without much incident.              many Americans have had a year to
and stores for pre-dawn discounts           to the reality of the economic                   “We’ve heard of a few scuffles among               adjust to the recession, yet continue to
on everything from TVs to toys and          downturn,” said John Squire, chief               customers, but overall it has been a very          face job losses and decline in income,
apparel. Stores had bigger discounts        strategy officer of Coremetrics.                 safe event,” a Wal-Mart spokesman                  forcing many consumers to only shop
and extended hours this year, including     “They’re thriftier, they’re savvier and          said.                                              for necessities.
midnight openings. Macy’s Inc., Toys        every one of them wants to be the best              Although Black Friday wasn’t a bad
“R” Us, K-B Toys Inc., and others that      bargain hunter out there.”                       turnout for retailers, they hope that



                                      World News
                                                       ...because sometimes things
                                                                            happen beyond the gates...
                                                                                      www.thecowl.com                   thecowl@providence.edu
December 3, 2009                                                                        WORLD                                                                                     The Cowl 9


         Arab Emirates to Help World Debt Crisis in Dubai
                   Another Sign that the Global Financial Crisis Still Lingers
         by Kevin Cassidy ’11                continued by saying “creditors need to choose” how to help the markets of
             World Staff                     take part of the responsibility for their Dubai by approaching the situation on
                                             decision to lend to companies.”                  a case-by-case basis. Earlier this year,
                  Dubai                          The United Arab Emirates (UAE) Abu Dhabi bailed out Dubai at the cost
                                             central      bank                                                       of $10 billion.
   Stocks went tumbling last week in         plans to establish                                                           The crisis shows
the markets of Dubai and Abu Dhabi,          a facility to                                                           that investors can
causing global panic. On Monday,             provide banks                                                           lose     money        on
Nov. 30, the government said they will       with         extra                                                      government bonds
not guarantee the debt of Dubai World,       liquidity       so                                                      even if they appear
which is having great difficulty paying      Dubai          can                                                      to    have      implicit
back some of its $59 billion to creditors,   support its own                                                         guarantees.        Even
according to BBC. The company                companies.                                                              federal        officials,
invested in lavish real-estate projects,     The facility will                                                       bondholders,        and
including artificial islands in the shape    serve all of the                                                        some         executives
of palm trees and a globe, and spent         banks of the                                                            were shocked the
heavily in acquiring properties like         UAE including                                                           debt-standstill
Barneys in New York City and The             the        foreign                                                      announcement
MGM Mirage in Las Vegas. Finance             banks operating                                                         because they hadn’t
minister     Abdulrahman          al-Saleh   in the Emirates.                                                        been warned ahead
released a statement, saying “creditors      The central bank                                                        of time.
think Dubai World is part of the             plans to “stand                                                             According to The
government, which is not correct.” He        behind”      UAE                                                        Wall Street Journal,
                                             banks       which                                                       Abu Dhabi and Dubai
                                             would        make                                                       are two of the seven
                                             additional funds                                                        semiautonomous
                                             available to local                                                      emirates that make                                                GETTY IMAGES

                                             institutions.                                                           up the United Arab          In recent years, Dubai has developed luxurious
                                             The        central                                                      Emirates. The capital       bulidings and tourist sites, such as this hotel,
                                             bank      decided                                                       is based in oil-rich        the Burj al-Arab.
                                             to make the                                                             Abu Dhabi. A rift           dump these investments. They could flee
                                             announcement                                               GETTY IMAGES seems to be evident         to invest their money in safer markets.
                                             before Monday’s Dubai’s main source of wealth has historically even though officials                Mohamed A. El-Erian, chief executive
                                             reopening of the been as a port. It does not have enormous oil from both places have                of Pimco, the giant bond trading firm,
                                             markets       after wealth like its neighboring countries.             denied one exists.           said, “What Dubai is going to do is make
                                             the long Muslim                                                        Dubai’s ruler, Sheik         people think more intensely about the
                                             holiday to boost confidence in the Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum,                                  lagging implications of last year’s crisis.
                                             country’s banking sector, which has delivered a prepared address at                                 It’s going to be a wake-up call to the
                                             large exposure to Dubai debt. Some a bankers conference earlier this                                people who thought that the financial
                                             business reporters have suggested month, in both Arabic and English, to                             crisis was just a flesh wound.”
                                             that the problem facing Dubai is decrease the speculation of a rift with                                According to The New York Times,
                                             the grey area between business and Abu Dhabi. “So, to the people of you                             Goldman Sachs released results on
                                             government. Many foreign investors who nag over Dubai and Abu Dhabi,                                Sunday from an analysis showing
                                             continued to withdraw funds from keep quiet,” he said, as the audience                              that federal governments worldwide
                                             the market, but believed the crisis applauded and laughed.                                          are less than willing to bail out
                                             wouldn’t spread to other financial                  Many investors watched the markets              overextended companies and their
                                             markets around the world. Dubai’s closely in the early morning hours on                             investors. Francesco Garzarelli, an
                                             markets are not large enough to set off Monday, but the markets were up nearly                      analyst in London, wrote, “This
With the global downturn, many financial     a financial crisis outside of the Middle- two percent in Asia. Experts are keeping                  episode represents a timely reminder
workers are unemployed, meaning that there   East. An Abu Dhabi government a close eye on companies that are highly                              that emergency public funding support
is little demand for new properties.         official said they plan to “pick and indebted to see if investors quickly                           should not be taken for granted.”



     Dead Sea is at Risk of Drying Out Due to Overuse
                                             importance, it is an international issue.”
         by Tommy Cody ’13                      The World Bank has been funding
             World Staff                     a two-year study of Jordan’s plan to
                                             build a pipeline from the Red Sea to
               Dead Sea                      the Dead Sea to start refilling the Dead
                                             Sea. The project would channel 70
                                             billion cubic feet of water into the Dead
   The Dead Sea, renowned for its            Sea through a canal, simultaneously
mineral-rich waters and healing mud,         creating fresh water and generating
faces the threat of being bled dry by        electricity. Although Jordan’s effort
the desert nations of Israel, Jordan,        is a step in the right direction, Jordan
and Syria. Since the 1960s the three         cannot solve the problem alone. In
nations have been diverting nearly 95        addition, there are many concerns
percent of the water from the Jordan         about the plan and the environmental
River, the Dead Sea’s main water             impact may have on the Dead Sea’s
source, to supplement its growing            delicate and unique chemistry. Despite
agricultural and industrial needs. The       the possible environmental effects,
surface level is currently dropping by       Mahasneh supports Jordan’s plan.
the rate of three feet per year and the         Some believe, however, that saving
shoreline has receded by more than a         the Jordan River is the key to saving
mile in some places. Due to current          the Dead Sea. The Jordan River is
political unrest in the area, nothing        currently under major ecological
has been or is being done to rectify         pressure. Tons of raw sewage gush,
the problems at hand. Former Jordan          unfiltered and uncontrolled, into the                                                                                                             AFP
Valley Authority chief and water             small stream left after the diversion of          The drying shores of the Dead Sea, south of the Jordanian capital Amman. The Dead Sea may
expert Dureid Mahasneh voiced his            the majority of the river. According to           soon shrink to a lifeless pond.
concern about the current lack of            FoEME (Friends of the Earth Middle
political action and the far reaching        East), in the past 50 years the river’s
consequences the drying up of the            annual flow has been cut from 46                  and industrial requirements. Large                about it,” said Khanazreh. There are
Dead Sea would create if something is        billion cubic feet per year, to around            sinkholes have been appearing along               an estimated 100 sinkholes in the
not done soon.                               2.5 billion cubic feet per year.                  the shoreline, destroying farms and               Ghor Haditha area alone. Jordanian
   “It might be confined into a small           Also, according to water experts,              industries. Izzat Khanazreh, a 42-year-           officials are planning on attempting
pond. It is likely to happen and this is     the majority of the springs in the                old farmer, recounted what a sinkhole             to acquire foreign financial aid at the
extremely serious,” said Mahasmeh.           Jordan Valley which flow directly                 did to him and his land. “A sinkhole              Copenhagen conference this coming
Nobody is doing anything now to              into the Dead Sea are currently                   destroyed my farm 10 years ago and                month to help them deal with the
save it, saving the Dead Sea is a            dammed. Jordan, with a population                 forced me to move and work for other              growing problems that have occurred
regional issue, and if you take the          of six million and counting, needs as             farmers, nobody compensated me for                due to the slow death of the Dead Sea.
heritage, environmental and historical       much water as it can get to support               my loss. My land was full of cracks
importance, or even the geographical         its expanding domestic, agricultural,             and it was impossible to do anything
                        Roving
            Photography                                                                                              Page 10
                                                                                                             December 3, 2009


   If you were the White House gate
crashers, where would you crash next?



                  “Tiger Woods’ house.”                                  “The Playboy mansion.”
            Kealan Bakke ’10, Adam Thomas ’10                          Josh Scott ’10, Dan Fisher ’10




                    “Father Shanley’s house.”                              “P. Diddy’s White Party.”
                         Andy Kowal’10                       Regina Loftus ’12, Melissa Tran ’12, Kari Hardgrove ’12
                                                                                Katie McCann ’12




                    “The Vatican.”                                    “Prince William’s wedding.”
  Colleen Caragher ’12, Father Batts, Conor Flattery ’12            Donnah Gallett ’11, Italia Ieraci ’11,
                                                                           Bridget Correia ’11




                                                       “Is that a serious question?”
                                                                     -The Wedding Crashers



   www.fanpop.com
                      Commentary                                                                                                                                         Page 22
                                                                                                                                                             December 3, 2009



  Kris Kringle Was One Radical Dude
      What We Can Learn from Santa and His Rebellious Ways
         by Tim Fleming ’11               on the basis that toys do not foster        walk freely through the front doors
          Commentary Staff                civil productivity, but instead lead to     of houses, he resorts to chimneys. He
                                          laziness, dependence, and in the worst      starts stuffing socks with small toys to
         personal reflection              case scenario, a healthy imagination.       hide them from the Burgermeister’s
                                          Kris Kringle, however, will not stand       guards when they begin searching
   Among the incredibly commercial        for such intolerable rules. He is told      houses. In my eyes Kris Kringle was
messages and neatly-tied-up endings       over and over that his practices of         one of the original champions of civil
that just scream “deus ex machina”        delivering toys on “the holiest day         disobedience.
our generation can learn a great          of the year,” Christ’s birthday, are           Not only does this beg the question
deal from the stop motion Christmas       morally, socially, and lawfully wrong,      of when did we forget what the
classic Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town.    yet he refuses to cease and desist as his   Christmas season is all about, but
For those of you can’t recall, it’s the   orders prescribe. When he no longer         also what is the Christmas season all
movie that tells the story of Santa       can           work in the daylight          about really? Sure, we give and receive
Claus from start to finish. It explains                      because of the law,      gifts, but as rational young adults we
how he chose to enter homes via                                 he      continues     can all agree that there is something
chimneys and how one man                                           under        the   more behind our merry traditions. The
can be named Kris Kringle,                                          cover        of   ideas of hope and harmony, peace and
Santa Claus, and Saint Nick                                         night. When       friendship spread everywhere during
at the same time. The birth                                          he can no        Christmas time. We look to those who
of the Christmas stocking is                                             longer       need help, regardless of circumstance
explained, and Winter Warlock                                                         and give of ourselves to them, much
is introduced as the in-charge                                                        like Kris Kringle himself. However,
director of seasonal cold and                                                         these sentiments slowly fade as we
snow. However, as                                                                       are returned to the hustle and bustle
I watched this film                                                                      of our daily lives, but what if this
with my eight-year-                                                                       Christmas there was more? What if
old sister I couldn’t                                                                       we demanded that this Christmas            Kringle and campaign for what we
help but think that                                                                          would be the Christmas of                 think is right, and on this campus there
we were viewing,                                                                              change?                                  is no doubt that behind the seemingly
for all intents and                                                                               The       entire   Christmas         similar facades there is a wealth of
purposes, different                                                                             tradition was started by a             difference in opinion and belief and
films. For her the                                                                               man with a mission and                a whole bunch of determination just
movie was about the                                                                              some guts, so why don’t               waiting to roar. Kris did it, and look
history of Christmas,                                                                             we try to make that a part           what’s become of his idea?
but I saw something                                                                                of our Christmas spirit?               Let’s change the perception of
different. It’s possible that                                                                      Take up your candy canes            apathy so many Providence College
my being a global studies                                                                           and stockings in support           outsiders assume. We have values and
major had influenced this                                                                           of what you believe in.            ideas that our important to us; we are
perceived difference but I saw                                                                       Put aside your worry              not apathetic. Let’s use our good spirits
a case study in Yuletide civil                                                                       and apathy, because if            and goodwill towards one another as
disobedience.                                                                                         there is any time of the         fuel to lift our heads and change what
   Unfortunately            for                                                                        year to get a movement          we want changed at PC, our towns,
the    children    of    Little                                                                         off the ground it’s the        and our world. Use Kris Kringle as
Sombertown,      toys     had                                                                           Christmas        season.       inspiration for a personal goal to not
been outlawed by the                                                                                     At some point we all          give up in the face of hardship (or a
evil    Burgermeister                                                                                         need to be a bit         stout curmudgeon of a man with a silly
Meisterburger. This                                                                                                  like Kris         name). As it has been sung many times
unjust      decree                                                                                                                     over: “Gone away is the bluebird, here
was      enacted                                                                                                                       to stay is a new bird.” Let that “new
                                                                                                                                       bird” be your voice.
                                                                                                                       GOOGLE IMAGES




   Disgracing the Embrace: When and Why for Hugs
           by Maryclaire Dugre ’10         sincere gesture of love could transpire     context, she instinctively hugs an               of ice cream dropped on your toes in
             Commentary Editor             on the quad at 10:45 a.m. (the wind         otherwise unhuggable prospect. Does              the frozen food aisle. It’s hardly worth
                                           tunnel around McVinney is more              she actually harbor tender feelings for          risking for someone you don’t even like.
                   society                 appropriate—at least then there’s the       this individual? Probably not. Then                 And what about emotionally? Is
                                           practical motivation of body warmth).       why the hug?                                     a huggee to feel closer to his hugger,
                                           In any case, what was once an intimate         Perhaps it’s because she was on               or is he just another dummy in the
   On Tuesdays, I have an awkward          act has been relegated to something         Mysterious Draught Beer number                   receiving line of life? It becomes even
15- minute break between classes.          synonymous with “Wussup?” Kinda             infinity; but I’m not so sure—I’d                more unclear when the moment is




                                          “
Never in a rush to delve into                                                                                                           shared by a guy and a gal. You might
Shakespeare lines, I usually wile                                                                                                       think you’ve said a simple hello to
                                               IT’S DUBIOUS THAT A SINCERE GESTURE OF LOVE


                                                                                                                           ”
away the minutes on a bench outside                                                                                                     the nerdy archery club captain when
Feinstein Center, where I spend              COULD TRANSPIRE ON THE QUAD AT 10:45 A.M                                                   you’ve actually just created your own
quality time with my Folgers and my                                                                                                     stalker—with a bow and arrow.
thoughts. And people watch.                sad, but mostly just amusing.               probably do the same if I saw ethics                The point is, nothing good comes
   This       past    Tuesday,   my           Overactive         hugging      seems    boy in the frozen food aisle on Sunday           from a casual hug. I don’t know why
observations led me to a stunning          particularly prevalent to the college       morning.                                         we ever nixed the handshake, but I
conclusion: Al Qaeda, gun-wielding         experience. We hug all the wrong               I might understand the mentality              think the full-body contact gets too
sixth-graders, and pirates must all        people for all the wrong reasons—           behind eager embracers if hugging                complicated. Hugging should be
be myths. Otherwise, I wouldn’t            acquaintances with whom we’d never          was remotely fun or facilitated more             reserved for people of appropriate
have witnessed five dramatic bear          share a Coke, friendly security guards      meaningful small talk (oxymoron?).               heights (because we’ve all had one
hugs between passing students in a         because it’s funny, and roommates,          But actually, it’s not enjoyable and             too many mouthfuls of chest hair. .
quarter of an hour. The world must         well, because we’re both in the             it makes things uncomfortable. An                .or just chest) who actually care about
be an ocean of love.                       kitchen—duh. Sometimes I feel it’s as if    effective hug requires a certain level of        each other, like Sonny and Cher. Hug
   Well, pirates do exist—that ocean       we’re competing with the other person:      agility. Because of that annoying thing          your grandma or your boyfriend, and
can get a little choppy.                   I’m going for the hug, because I want to    on our shoulders called a head, we               only when you really mean it. Selective
   So, considering our peachy-keen         out-hello this chick. Damn capitalism.      have to choose a side to lean toward             hugging will keep casual encounters
days ended with Eden, the younger             The hug has become a standard            mid-hug. Sometimes, it works out                 as they’re meant to be and lend some
generation’s tendency to supplement        reaction to surprise encounters. For        great, and you’re the perfect ying to            genuineness to our more personal
their casual hellos and goodbyes           example, a certain young lady is at a       your partner’s yang.                             moments.
with loving embraces is intriguing.        bar with her legitimately huggable             But many times, a Rocky Balboa-type               At the very least, can we try not
Isn’t a hug meant to display special       friends when she bumps into that            bob and weave ensues, and all that’s to          to hug outside Feinstein on Tuesday
affection for another person? Call         nonentity from her ethics class.            be gotten is a fat lip. Or that weird cheek-     mornings? I might start doubting Al-
me cynical, but it’s dubious that a        Shocked at seeing him in a different        on-cheek sensation. Or a half gallon             Qaeda again.
December 3, 2009                                                               COMMENTARY                                                                           The Cowl 23


         Make-Up: User                                                                                  TOO HOT FOR WORDS
       Discretion Advised
                                             myself to girls I could never compete
                by Allison Pelle ’11         with, but I never stopped wanting to
                 Commentary Staff            be like them.
                                                 So maybe that’s where it starts.
                     culture                 Our make-up habits begin as our
                                             personalities and levels of confidence
                                             form. To this day, I feel ten times
    When you really think about it,          more confident when I’m wearing
make-up is nothing more than a               make up. When I go to class without
combination of chemicals and dye.            it, I usually feel like I blend into the
It’s something so simple that plays a        scenery. But I’m not going to class to
fairly large role in many girls’ lives.      get hit on, either. I do, however, value
The concept of make-up isn’t new             feeling pretty and feminine and enjoy
or radical but it is strange. Women          the marginal possibility that I might
have been literally painting their           be noticed by the opposite sex. If you
faces for centuries. It is accepted,         asked most guys if they like to see
commonplace, even ritualistic. Girls         women with or without make-up,
share tips, bond over techniques, and        they would probably tell you they
lust after high-priced brands under          prefer “the natural look.” What they
soft department store lighting. Do we        don’t realize is that this so-called
wear make-up for men, for ourselves,         “natural look” takes 20 minutes to
or for other women?                                  create a flawless skin tone and
    A girl’s fascination with make-                         bright eyes. The “natural
                                                                                                                                      ISA ALI ’10 AND JOE MCMENAMIN ’10 / THE COWL
up starts young. I myself had                                  look” actually reveals
a make-over Barbie which,                                         my      acne   scars,
creepily enough, was
just a giant Barbie head
                                                                    uneven skin, and
                                                                       dark     under-                           “Stormpooper.”
on which I could test                                                   eye     circles.
out various lipstick,                                                   We a r i n g
eyeshadow, and blush                                                    m a k e - u p
hues. I had pretend                                                     makes       me
make-up for myself,                                                      walk a little
clumpy             electric                                              taller    and
blue powders and
fluorescent pink tubes.
                                                                        speak a bit
                                                                       louder.               Anger and Airwaves: Radios
To me, make-up was                                                         Not       all
something that was
glamorous and grown
up. I know that my
                                                                        girls are like
                                                                       myself.
                                                                     probably know
                                                                                   You     Ruined by Audience Impatience
mother resisted allowing                                           who they are. Some
me to wear real make-up for                                      don’t wear make-up                                                   even own a radio. Alarm clocks have
as long as possible.                                        at all. They probably                                                     been replaced by cell phones, and
    It was probably in late junior           don’t own much, wear it for rare,                             by Ben Perry ’10
                                                                                                           Commentary Staff           radios by iPods or other MP3 players.
high or early high school when               special occasions and generally don’t                                                       And yet, radio stations still exist,
I actually began wearing consistent          feel the need. I envy these girls.                                                       broadcasting the news, weather,
make-up just like all of my friends.         Some girls are the complete opposite.                               culture
                                                                                                                                      traffic reports, and music to targeted
I used to wake up an hour and a half         They’re never seen without a full face                                                   audiences…but       they’ve   changed
before school, start to wash and blow        of perfectly sculpted cheekbones and             Way back in the early ’80s, VH1         drastically. No longer is radio the
dry my hair, as well as apply full           curled eyelashes. Some abuse it to            played the very first music video for      primary form of media entertainment,
make-up.                                     the point where they look downright           the song “Video Killed the Radio Star,”    and the radio stations know it. The
    Looking back, this now seems faintly     clownish. This kind of maintainence           a fitting debut for music television.      radio drama has gone away in favor
absurd. Who was I trying to impress?         seems absolutely exhausting.                  Maybe video did kill the radio star in     of more fast-paced entertainment
Now I’m lucky if I wear make-up to               The problem with make-up is               the ’80s. I mean, how could you take       catering to the lowered intelligence
class one day a week at best. My hair        simply that it doesn’t last. We buy           anyone seriously with those haircuts       and attention span of an entire nation.
is consistently in a ponytail and jeans      these products that spit blatant lies on      and clothes? If you don’t believe me,      Short songs with absolutely no time
are a pipe dream compared to my pilly,       their packages. We all know that your         go on YouTube and watch the music          to breathe between computerized



                                                                                           “
worn out sweatpants. So what if I wore       mascara isn’t waterproof and there’s
them three days in a row last week?          no way that your lip gloss will last all
                                                                                               THE MODERN EQUIVALENT WOULD BE IF CNN


                                                                                                                                                                              ”
Judge me, people. But I know exactly         day. At the end of the day, you’re going
why I, and so many other girls my age        to wash it off. In the morning when           REPORTED THE PLOT OF THE MOVIE MEN IN BLACK
felt the need to look our best at school     you wake up, you’re going to be bare-
day after day. Because high school is        faced once again. It’s time to reapply.       video for “Total Eclipse of the Heart”     beats and electronically altered vocals
a jungle. It’s full of insecurity and low         I wish that I could wake up with my      by Bonnie Tyler. Actually, even if you     have taken over for the imaginative
                  self-esteem. I wasted      face made up every morning. I wish that       do believe me, go watch it anyway.         narratives of past radio glory. Radio
                           countless hours   I were as confident about myself without      It’s probably the most hilarious music     appeals to the sense of sound, while
                              comparing      any make up. But both of those things         video I’ve ever seen in my life. Once      television appeals to multiple senses
                                             will never happen. What’s important is        you finish, you’ll know what I mean.       at once. The only sense to which
                                             making sure that make up is only used             In any case, video did kill a lot of   television does not appeal these days
                                             to enhance what you already have. If          radio stars. Where is the radio drama?     is common sense.
                                             make-up makes you feel good about             No longer do we get to hear after              So video didn’t kill the radio star,
                                             yourself, wear it proudly.                    dinner “And now….The Adventures of         just transformed him. No longer does
                                                                                           Superman! Brought to you by Crunchy        the family gather around the radio
                                                                                           Oats Cereal” or something like that.       after dinner for some family bonding,
                                                                                           The American attention span can’t          they flip on the TV and see what
                                                    GOOGLE IMAGES                          focus long enough to simply listen         mundane reality show is on that night.
                                                                                           to a story read aloud. The television      But radio stars refuse to die. They’re
                                                                                           destroyed the human imagination, so        out there, riding the airwaves, looking

         GOT A VOICE?                                                                      that when listening to a radio drama,
                                                                                           something seems to be missing. What
                                                                                           is missing is the image ADD, the
                                                                                                                                      for someone to entertain, whether it is
                                                                                                                                      by air or the internet through podcasts.
                                                                                                                                      Maybe they’re fossils who refuse to die,
 JOIN THE COMMENTARY STAFF                                                                 flickering from action-packed shot
                                                                                           to action-packed shot in such a way
                                                                                           as to overload the senses and give an
                                                                                                                                      or maybe they’re heroes to be lauded
                                                                                                                                      for their valor. It’s really up to you to
                                                                                                                                      decide, but whatever the outcome,
                                                                                           impression of actual content.              remember the radio star.

We are looking for opinionated and
                                                                                               We could never again have a radio-
                                                                                           induced scare like the broadcast of
                                                                                           War of the Worlds (a novel that video
passionate writers for next semester.                                                      eventually mutilated, by the way). The
                                                                                           modern equivalent would be if CNN
                                                                                           reported the plot of the movie Men In
                                                                                           Black as if it were actually happening,
                                                                                           or something equally as ludicrous.
Pick up an application in Slavin G05 today!                                                In any case, as a college student, I’ve
                                                                                           found that many of my peers don’t
                                                                                                                                         GOOGLE IMAGES
24 The Cowl                                                                  COMMENTARY                                                                      December 3, 2009


     Best Class for College
  Students? Relationships 101
                              Tangents
                                             should definitely be a priority on the
                                                                                                                                  &            Tirades
                                                                                           Its the Most Slumberful Time of the Year. I think that the reason everyone loves
                 by Viviana Garcia ’12                                                     Thanksgiving so much is because it is a holiday designed to give us a good night’s
                                             minds of many.
                  Commentary Staff                                                         rest. Think about it: you eat copious amounts of turkey which gives you a mighty
                                                Unfortunately,      as      difficult
                                             as relationships are in real life,            dose of tryptophan.           You drink a glass of wine, or two, or three. You watch
                         campus                                                            Snoopy floating                    by in a balloon for three hours. You watch
                                             relationships in college are always
                                             a bit more of a challenge. We want            football games                         that generally are not very competitive.
   Many of us are faced with endless         to find ourselves in the correct              And you’re                             left with your family. That is enough to tire
questions about what defines dating,         mindset of ordering each one of our                                                 anyone out. All of these ingredients make it
relationships, courtships, and even          relationship experiences to its proper                                             so that by late evening Thursday night you
marriage. Thinking that we’d have it all     end, meaning marriage, but how do                                                  are either passed out or ready to. It is a great
figured out by college didn’t work out       we do that? How do we know if that                                                 feeling.—Andy Kowal ’10
and most of us have found ourselves          person is the one? How do we let go
stumbling along, pretending like we          when they’re not? What are the signs                                                  The Host’s Woes. Over Thanksgiving
know what we’re doing when we don’t,         we should be watching out for? There                                                  break, I had the luxury of hosting 25 people
hoping to find the right approach. The       are a million and one questions, but                                                  at my house for a feast. Not an easy task
college environment is both artificial       not always enough answers. We can,                                                    by any means, with 20+ pounds of turkey
and misleading in the sense that             however, seek the wisdom of those                                                   and 15 pounds of potatoes. Normally we
the way in which relationships are           who have experienced this before us,                                           have Thanksgiving at my house, but I have been
conducted throughout these next four         even though some ideas and practices                                           lucky the past few years to not have to partake in
years, in no way mimics your future          have to be modernized a bit, the wealth                                        the morning-of routines necessary to allow for a
relationships. It feels like there are       of wisdom that we can gain from
                                                                                                                           successful Thanksgiving. When in high school, I
endless variables affecting the outcome      those more experienced should not
of every relationship. We struggle to        be something to pass up, and that is                         was always at the football game, missing the stress that arrives even
find the right fit, the perfect outline,     exactly what the conference aimed for.        before the people arrive. This year I was not as lucky, and was forced to help more
or that light bulb above our heads              Being a woman, I know how difficult        than usual. This year, we decided to have a typical Thanksgiving in which we
that will click on when we figure out        it can be to want to figure everything        tried to fit everybody in the same room around one table. Well, we got 19 around
exactly how we should behave without         out, to want to find that perfect             one table, and took the six smallest kids and placed them on a side table. In order
falling too hard and without getting         someone, and go about it flawlessly. It       for this to have happened, I was in charge of rearranging one of our rooms and
hurt. If you could find an easier way        can be troubling and devastating when         finding a way to get enough chairs for everybody. Although it was all a lot of work
to avoid the hurdles, obstacles, and         things don’t work out with that one           getting everybody in one room, it was worth being able to look around and see
mistakes, wouldn’t you want to tune in       guy who claimed your heart for a short        everybody in the family.—Jeff Gahan ’11
a find out? I for one would and I think      time and you find yourself wondering
that with a little bit of help, my outlook   who will be the one, or if there ever         Whose Side Are We On? In 2004, Iraqi terrorist Ahmed Hasim Abed brutally
has definitely become clearer.                                                             murdered four American security contractors who were working in Fallujah at
   On the weekend of Nov. 13, the                                                          the time. The bodies of the Americans were then burned and dragged through the
Princeton campus witnessed a true                                                          streets of the city, with two of the corpses hung from a bridge on the Euphrates
cultural revolution. Thanks to Cassy                                                       River. As photos of the bodies were broadcast over the world, the murders in
Hough, founder of Princeton’s                                                              Fallujah received much publicity, making Abed one of the world’s most wanted
Anscombe Society, as well as the Love                                                      terrorists. The troops, then, had what should have been a moral booster when
and Fidelity Network (LFN), over
                                                                                           the news broke that Abed had been captured by three US Navy SEALs several
200 students from 50 colleges and
universities packed the lecture hall at                                                    months ago. Instead of being praised as heroes, however, the SEALs are facing
the Friend’s Center to attend the LFN’s                                                    criminal charges. As The New York Post reports, such controversy has resulted
second annual conference entitled                                                          from Abed’s showing officials a “bloody lip,” alleging that his captors punched
Sexuality, Integrity, and the University.                                                  him. The SEALs, who have hired lawyers, will be arraigned on Dec. 7 with the
Today’s campuses provide students                                                          proceedings for their court-marshal likely taking place in January. America is
with a warped view of the meaning                                                          surely the only nation in history to so blatantly treat its noblest servants with
behind moral and sexual behavior.                                                          such dishonor.—Mark Scirocco ’10
The “anything goes” mentality is
continually promulgated, leaving the                                                       Dannys, Clubbies, or Phillips? Someone once said, “Let the good times roll.”
negative effects of our sexual culture                                                     Sure, college is a good time but eventually the fun has to end. Every decision that
unmentioned. Their purpose in hosting
                                                                                           we make at this point in our lives has a consequence. With finals approaching,
this conference was to educate students
in the rightful purpose, meaning, and                                                      it is important to have your priorities in check. Doing poorly on a final exam
ordering of sex and relationships and                                                      results in a bad grade in a class and a bad grade in a class lowers your GPA and
how they can uphold to that in our                                                         a low GPA results in you being a less competitive job applicant. It is quite the
very “sex-pressured” society.                                                              domino effect! So make the right choice and take a night off from the fast life of
   Students across the country
                                                                           GOOGLE IMAGES   Providence and study for your exams. You also really do not want to have your
are standing up for their strongly           will be. I tend to be a perfectionist         parents on your back about your grades. It is brutal hiding anything from them
grounded beliefs in happy, healthy, and      with nearly every other aspect of my          and it really is one of the worst feelings in the world. Avoid the ever-popular,
chaste relationships. There is no doubt      life, but coming to the realization that      “No they haven’t posted the grades yet.” Your parents will see right through that
that these students are unwaveringly         relationships can’t always be analyzed,       because they used to pull the same garbage in their day. Don’t let one class throw
committed to providing their peers back      dissected and made to work out                you off the deep end and drop you down into poor academic standing. Keep
on their particular campuses with an         exactly how you want them to was              in mind that we attend Providence College to get an education and everything
alternative to what has quickly become       always, and still is, a difficult concept     else, though it may seem more important, is really secondary. Trust me, I have to
the norm for so many. While facing           for me to grasp. Taking the leap of           remind myself of this all the time. My great grandfather used to say “Education
constant opposition, surprisingly from       falling in love, or like, with someone        is a power.” So do yourself a favor and don’t waste it, even though there are
a generation promoting the exercise          can seem like the scariest thing in the       many temptations.—Jenn DiPirro ’12
of different lifestyles (ironic, right?),    world. Not knowing how to go about it
they are in for the fight and putting up     once you’ve already leapt can, at times,
                                             be even scarier. So, if you’re trying to      From the Fairway to the Driveway. The transition from driving a golf cart to
powerful arguments to combat those
set out to criticize and condemn them.       figure things out, like I am, you’re not      driving a car is an odd feeling at first. I learned this when I played 18 holes on
   I am proud to say that Providence         alone.                                        Sunday and then drove home. Tiger Woods learned this last week when he drove
College accounted for a significant              Courtship has been overhauled             a real car for probably one of the first times in his life. In an attempt to escape his
portion of the student population,           and has undergone a massive cultural          deranged, nine iron-armed spouse, Woods fled his Florida estate in his obviously
taking 12 students, including myself,        change that has taken place in the            seldom-used SUV. As Tiger found out when he slammed on the gas and ran into
to partake in the experience. The            last century. Men and women are lost          a fire hydrant and a tree, the accelerator on an actual motor vehicle is much more
opportunity to mix and mingle with           and confused, more so now than ever,          sensitive than that of a golf cart. The golfer handled this rare exciting event in
students from Princeton, Harvard,            especially concerning what roles they         his life as expected: boringly. Despite his                    enormous potential to
University of Virginia, and many other       should be assuming in a relationship.         be a vibrant public figure, Tiger
universities, gave me insight into the       Guys are confused by the actions of           is just as boring as every other
differences in campus culture. What          women and women feel that men no              boring golfer that has ever
struck me was the severe animosity           longer take initiative. Why is that?          golfed. He is handling his
that many of them deal with on                   These are the problems facing our         recent curious car crash with
account of their stance to create a          college culture each and every day.           as little excitement and with as many
movement of awareness for the issues         It is due to these students who are           dull remarks as we have come to expect
at stake. Relationships in college make      willing to put their social reputations       from him and his bleak personality. He
up a significant portion of a student’s      on the line for the pursuing of a greater     remains just as bland as he was before his
day-to-day and account for quite a bit       good, one that is the answer to true          scandalous fender-bender but has
of emotional stress. Hence, figuring         happiness and fulfillment. They have          proved that we should all scream
out the best ways in which to approach       taken the issues head on and there is
                                                                                           “FORE!” whenever he gets
them and finding the path that will          nothing stopping them. Are you ready
                                             for a cultural revolution?                    behind the wheel of anything
lead you to truly being happy with
the person that you care most about                                                        other than a golf cart.
                                                                                           — Chris Slavin ’12

                                                                                                                               GOOGLE IMAGES
December 3, 2009                                                               COMMENTARY                                                                          The Cowl 25



What Makes America Great?                                                                                                                  by Fr. James Cuddy, O.P.

   Don’t Ask Obama
                                                                                                                                             Contributing Writer


                                                                                               Thanksgiving was awesome. There           preparation and expectation of Advent
                                                                                            was the joy of celebrating with my           without blowing off your academic
                                                   Social security was created in 1935      Dominican brothers and reflecting on
              by Joe Sirianni ’10                                                                                                        responsibilities. You can do both. The
                                                as a part of President Franklin D.
              Commentary Staff                                                              God’s many blessings. I got to catch up      key to doing this can be found in a
                                                Roosevelt’s New Deal. Currently, it
                                                holds the metal for the single largest      with old friends and overindulge in          quotation from one of my favorite sea-
                     politics                   government program in the world,            turducken. It was glorious.                  sonal meditations: “Advent is a time for
                                                accounting for 25 percent of our federal       But then suddenly it was over. We         being deeply shaken so that man will
                                                budget and paying out over $650             returned to school and came face-to-         wake up to himself.” Take a second to
   Successful politicians in the United         billion in benefits in 2009 alone. Social   face with the grim reality of the end of     reread that. What does it say about this
States have always praised and                  security is the over-arching symbol         the semester. There are papers due that      holy season?
appealed to the notion of American              of America’s entitlement culture; a         you’re kicking yourself for not starting        First, the author suggests that
exceptionalism. In my opinion, the              culture which will soon prove to be         earlier. There’s reading to catch up on      Advent is a time of being unsettled
United States is a singular nation              largely unsustainable. When FDR             and exams for which you need to cram.        and thrown off balance. That’s what
based on an incomparable ideology               first pushed for social security, it was    In desperation, you’ll soon turn to Red      it means to be “deeply shaken”. It
that puts us above all others in the            extremely controversial in that it was      Bull and Starbucks, hoping to cheat          sounds an awful lot like what so many
world. The perception of America seen           seen as the most massive extension of       sleep of a couple of precious hours and      of you are going through right now in
through the eyes of President Barack            government control over the economy         finish your work. At some point about        the waning days of the semester. Being
Obama, however, harshly diminishes              America had ever seen. Does this            two weeks from now you’ll collapse           anxious and worried is part and parcel
our influence and standing on the               sound familiar?                             across the finish line, another semester     of this time of year.
international stage. He recognizes the             Social security has failed in the        in the books.                                   So how can you take this disquieted
United States as just another country           United States. As you know, social             In the midst of this transition from      time of the semester and use it to pre-
on a long list, somewhere in between            security benefits provided to retirees      the joy of Thanksgiving to the demands       pare for Christmas? That’s where the
Albania and Zimbabwe.                           are funded through the payroll taxes        of the end of the semester, the Church       second part of the quotation comes in.
   In doing so, Obama goes against              of current workers; however, by the         enters into the holy season of Advent.
                                                year 2040, the program’s ‘trust fund’                                                    When we’re deeply shaken, we real-
what makes this country great: a                                                            This is the time when the whole world
staunch commitment to freedom                   will have been completely depleted.                                                      ize that we are not self-sufficient. We
                                                By this time, the amount of money           prepares for the coming of the Messiah       wake up to the reality of our own lives.
held steady through the workings
of a capitalist economic system.                being taken in through taxes will           at Christmas. As we say in the liturgy,      Simply put, we cannot live by our own
Somewhere along the lines, capitalism           be insufficient to cover the benefits       we wait in joyful hope for the coming        power alone. Each of us needs God’s
has gotten a bad wrap in this country,          promised by the government. Take            of our Savior, Jesus Christ.                 mercy and grace. We need a Savior.
but I say it is what makes us great,            into account that the amount of                At first glance, it seems that timing        And that’s why Christ comes among
and is in fact what all other countries         money the government has promised           of Advent could not possibly be worse.       us as a man. He comes to meet us—
respect us for. The president, however,         beyond what is actually able to pay         After all, there’s no time to us to take     deeply shaken as we are—and bring us
seems to be giving up on capitalism,            already exceeds $15.3 trillion! So what     a breath or have a decent meal (thank        peace and joy. He comes to do for us
and instead has attempted to breed              does Obama suggest we do? Oh that’s         God for Ramen and Easy Mac!) during          what we could never do for ourselves.
contempt for it by developing a                 right; he wants to spend more trillions     these hectic last weeks. Who has the            So over the next few weeks as you
political and economic foundation               of dollars that the government doesn’t      luxury of preparing spiritually for the      stress, cram, and over-caffeinate your-
for a more socialized and collectivist          have to create even more entitlement        celebration of Jesus’ birth? It’s one of     selves for finals, take advantage of be-
government. If you don’t believe me,            programs that can and will only be          those things that can get sacrificed for     ing deeply shaken and let yourselves
just consider the health care debate            funded by increased taxes and more          the good of your studies.                    wake up. Utter the prayer: “Come Lord
in America in relation to the crisis of         borrowed money from the Chinese.               But there is a way to enter into the      Jesus”. That’s what Advent is all about.
social security.                                   It took me a while to realize why

                                                                                                     Letters to the Editor
                                                the president would be pushing for
                                                something that is so clearly illogical
                                                and detrimental to the future of this
                                                country, but once it clicked everything
                                                was clear. Obama wants capitalism to        Two Strikes for Office of Student Conduct
                                                fail. Shown through his commitment
                                                to a welfare state, Obama believes that        Once again, the Office of Student         fore students have even had the chance
                                                the government is smarter than both         Conduct has demonstrated a blatant           to submit their appeal.
                                                the individual person, and the market.      disregard for fair process in failing to        If the Office of Student Conduct can-
                                                He believes that there are elites in the    adhere to the College’s disciplinary         not follow a procedure as simple as not
                                                government that can decide better           policies. While consulting students          applying a particular sanction until af-
                                                than the American people, since we are      throughout their judicial proceedings,       ter an appeal is resolved, what is next?
                                                incapable of taking care of ourselves.      I recently was made aware that this of-      These instances only further enforce
                                                   But the question remains; is the         fice has been unjustly sending letters       the idea that students must be aware
                                                government really smarter than we           home to the parents of students who          of their rights in order to advocate for
                                                are? Social security is a government        allegedly had violated school policy.        themselves. The Handbook also reads,
                                                program that is extremely inefficient,         Parental notification is one of the       “Providence College views student dis-
                                                costly, and poorly maintained. It           possible sanctions that the office may       cipline as an integral part of its educa-
                                                not only is on the verge of going           render to a student who is found guilty      tional process.” One would think that
                                                bankrupt, it is gravely threatening         of a particular charge. The notification     the College would ensure that this “in-
                                                America’s future financial security. It     involves a letter that is sent to the stu-   tegral part” was actually managed by
                                                would be arrogant and disgustingly          dent’s home, explaining, for example,        people who knew what they were do-
                                                irresponsible to expect that the            that the student was caught with al-         ing. Procedures that are explicitly stated
                                                government can take on yet another          cohol. The main injustice behind the         need to be followed more consistently.
                                                entitlement program. Time and time          recent notifications is that many of         Additionally, there is a strong need to
                                                again, the government has proven            these letters have been sent prior to the    promote the educational, learning expe-
                                                to be an ineffective regulator of such      full conclusion of a student’s proceed-      rience aspect of the disciplinary system
                                                programs. What makes Obama think            ings. The Student Handbook explicitly        at Providence College instead of unfair-
                                                this time will be different?                states, “Sanctions resulting from the        ly treating students and abusing their
                                GOOGLE IMAGES                                               case will not be implemented until           established rights.
                                                                                            after the appeal is resolved.” Some of
                                                                                            these letters have been sent home be-        —Jon Dooley ’11
            High Fives & Nose Dives
                                                                                            Differing Views on No Meat Policy During Lent
High Fives: It’s Christmastime! Dust off your copy of Mariah Carey’s Christmas                  A practice that does not get much        saying that “while the majority of
album and hide your mom’s ugly holiday sweaters...’tis the season!                          controversy here at Providence College       students are Catholic, there are still
                                                                                            is the absence of meat in Ray and Slavin     many that are not, and should not be
HIV Testing on Campus for World AIDS Day. Props to SHEPARD for providing                    on Holy Days and Lenten Fridays.             subjected to a religious act if they do
resources and promoting awareness.                                                          In the Catholic religion, abstaining         not want to.”
                                                                                            from meat recognizes Jesus’s sacrifice.         Personally, I believe that PC has
Scrubs Signs on for Another Season We thought our friends at Sacred Heart Hospital          However, should the College impose           the right not to serve meat on Lenten
were history, but now we can look forward to at least twelve more hilarious                 these Catholic beliefs on all students?      Fridays. It’s a well-known Dominican
episodes. Thank you, ABC.                                                                        An anonymous PC student says            college, so students should know that
                                                                                            that while there are some non-Catholic       Catholicism is a large aspect here. Also,
Nose Dives: Breakfast All Day, But No More International Food Station in Alumni.            students at PC, the College has such         meat abstinence is only for six or seven
Can our friends in lower Slavin do anything right? Yes, we asked for breakfast,             a strong Catholic background that it         days out of the school year, which really
but not at the expense of the best available in the food court. Now instead of thin         shouldn’t serve meat on Lenten Fridays.      isn’t a lot. In general, if students are
crust pizza and stir-fry, we can look forward to eggs, eggs, and oh, eggs.                  Also, Catholic students should be able       non-Catholic, they should know that
                                                                                            to eat on campus without having to           by being a PC student they may have
                                                               —Maryclaire Dugre ‘10        worry about accidentally disobeying          to follow some Catholic regulations.
                                                                                            their religion.
                                                                                                Josh Schonfeld ’12 disagrees,            —Kaitlyn M McGowan ’12
December 3, 2009                                    ADVERTISEMENT                                                    The Cowl 15




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                                 Arts&
                                Entertainment                                                                                                         Page 16
                                                                                                                                         December 3, 2009




      CASHING Laughter    OUT                                                                                       A New York Minute

    Ben Bailey Drives the                                                                                             with Ben Bailey
                                                                                                                  How was the transition from stand-up to
                                                                                                                  Cash Cab?
                                                                                                                      It wasn’t so much a transition, but Cash
                                                                                                                  Cab has definitely had an effect on my
                                      by Nahuel Fanjul-Arguijo ’11       great at hosting Cash Cab (he has        stand-up. Since there was no expectation
                                             A&E Editor                  three Daytime Emmy nominations           before, they knew me for my stand-up.
                                                                         for “Outstanding Game Show               Now everybody knows me as the Cash Cab
                                     It’s the Cash Cab guy! Um, I        Host” and two awards for the best        guy, and I’m so nice on television because
                                  mean, it’s Ben Bailey! You probably    game show); he just seems to be          I feel like I should be since I’m throwing
                                  all missed the comedy show right       annoyed by the fact that the show        these people into random situations, like,
                                  before Thanksgiving break, on          is what he is best known for.            “Hey, guess what, you’re on TV right
                                  Thursday, Nov. 19, since there            His stand-up is a lot better than     now.” But in stand-up it’s hard to be that
                                  were only about 800 seats filled in    his little snippets of comedy on the     nice; as a comedian you have to run the
                                  Peterson Recreation Center, and let    show. Sure, his little stabs at dumb     show. Some people come to the show and
                                  me just shove it in your faces: you    people on Cash Cab are great, but        are just like, “Holy ****, that’s not what I
                                  missed one hell of a show.             with his stand-up he has a chance        expected, the Cash Cab guy curses a lot.”
                                     Growing up, Ben Bailey was          to tell full stories and act them out    It’s just not the same things; there are
                                  always known for his smart-            on stage. His giant-like body and        certain things that they want. They want
                                  aleck remarks, constantly getting      hilarious facial expressions make        me to talk about the show, and they want
                                  thrown out of class for them. So,      his stand-up great. A lot of his bits    to hear me scream “red light challenge.”
                                  when he moved to California            on stage are about Cash Cab, but
                                  at 21, he quickly found work. It       that’s what he is hired to talk about,   Who was the worst contestant on the
                                  wasn’t really the work you would       and that’s what people want to hear.     Cash Cab?
                                  expect—he was actually hired as a      We got many stories unrelated to             So we pick this guy up downtown, and
                                  bodyguard because of his 6-foot,       the show, but come on, what kind of      we’re about 40 blocks into the game and
                                  6-inch figure—but this led to his      show would it be if the Cash Cab guy     the guy says he wants to use a street shout
                                  current comedic work.                  never mentioned Cash Cab?                out. So I pull over, this girl sees me; she
                                     One drunken night at a bar after       The game show does fill Ben’s         starts screaming “Cash Cab!” and runs over
                                  work, Ben was telling old stories      stand-up with more stories to tell,      to the van. He starts yelling, “She’s a shill,
                                  that intrigued and humored a           but he doesn’t need the show to          these people are all shills,” which is a term
                                  comedian close by, and this led to     be famous. He is a great stand-up        used in card games for someone working
                                  him getting a spot on a comedy         comedian, and you should check           to cheat someone out, and then he starts
                                  show lineup the next weekend.          out his old shows to get more            to say he doesn’t want to play anymore,
                                  Since then he has appeared on          acquainted with his work (and            and then he starts screaming at me like
                                  shows like The Tonight Show with       laugh your ass off). I can’t deny that   he wants to fight me. So my director just
                                  Jay Leno, The Late Late Show with      Cash Cab is a great hit, and he is       tells me to put the car in park, I get out,
                                  Craig Kilborn, Last Call with Carson   very well known because of it, but       and they make him leave. He was a real
                                  Daly, Comedy Central’s Premium         you should see the other side of Ben     ass. Like he was crazy—it’s a cable game
                                  Blend, and his own Comedy Central      Bailey, a side in which he is actually   show, the point is for people to win. If you
                                  Presents 30-minute special, which      standing up and not constrained to       win, we are a better show.
                                  debuted in 2005.                       the front seat of a van.
                                     From there he was given the host                                             What’s the best place to get picked up?
                                  position for the incredibly popular                                                 I tell everyone the same thing: there really
                                  Cash Cab. I don’t want to say                                                   isn’t a best place to get picked up. The people
                                  he hates being the host                                                         get in, and I go where they go. I know where
                                  of Cash Cab, but Ben                                                            I start every day, but I can’t tell you that.
                                  seems to show some
                                  dislike towards his                                                             Have you ever been in an accident during
                                  current job. Stand-                                                             the show?
                                  up is his bread and                                                                Two different guys that worked on
                                  butter; it’s what                 he                                            the show as production assistants both
                                  he is great at and                                                              crashed the car while parking the car at
                                  what he loves to                                                                night. I never hit anything, but these two
                                  do. Don’t get me                                                                guys did in the parking garage. (Editor’s
                                  wrong, I’m not                                                                  Note: if you want to know what parking garage
                                  saying he is not                                                                the Cash Cab is at every night, come to me,
                                                                                                                  and for a small fee I can tell you.)

                                                                                                                  Has anyone ever been rejected from the
                                                                                                                  Cash Cab?
                                                                                                                      Only once, these two girls were just
                                                                                                                  making fun of the show the whole time.
                                                                                                                  Saying it was a dumb show, that no one
                                                                                                                  watches it. I don’t know what the deal
                                                                                                                  was—if they thought they would be on the
                                                                                                                  show if they did this, but they just annoyed
                                                                                                                  me to no end, so I just said, “Why don’t
                                                                                                                  you just get the **** out of here if you don’t
                                                                                                                  like the show? If you don’t want to be on
                                                                                                                  it, your wish is my command, get the ****
                                                                                                                  out!” And of course, they just said “Fine,
                                                                                                                  whatever!” I just didn’t want to waste my
                                                                                                                  time. We would have spent an hour and a
                                                                                                                  half shooting it and nothing to show for it,
                                                                                                                  so what was the point?

                                                                                                                  What do we have to look forward to in the
                                                                                                                  future from you or the Cash Cab?
                                                                                                                     There are 40 new episodes of Cash Cab
                                                                                                                  already finished and coming for whenever
                                                                                                                  Discovery decides to put them out. And I
                                                                                                                  have a one-hour stand-up special on Comedy
                                                                                                                  Central, which comes out in February, I think,
KRISTEN WHALEN ’11 / THE COWL                                                                                     which will also come out on DVD.
December 3, 2009                                                          ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT                                                                              The Cowl 17




Poor Excuse For Post-Apocalyptic
      by Nahuel Fanjul-Arguijo ’11                putting his name in with the handful
             A&E Editor                           of directors associated with the best
                                                  end-of-the-world movies (i.e. Roland
   Cormac McCarthy’s novel The Road               Emerich). Again, I am giving Hillcoat
is by far the best book I have read in            props for the looks of the movie and
my three years at this institution. The           putting all blame for the downfall of
struggle the father and son go through            The Road on Joe Penhall who adapted
to find hope in a post-apocalyptic                McCarthy’s novel.
world is one of the dominant themes                  This review may be a little biased
in the book, only beaten by the great             since I am a huge fan of the book, but
relationship shown between the                    I can probably conclude that if you did
two with few words and gestures.                  not read The Road, the movie might be
These characteristics make the book               good for you. The movie shows all the
an instant favorite and a heart-                  action that is in the book with minor
wrenching story, but frankly, the                 tweaks to the plot, so it won’t bore
recently released movie does not                  you—it will only annoy those who
come close to showing this.                       have read it.
   I’m not going to trash the movie,                 Apart from the lack of relationship
as it was very well done. The world               between the father and son in this
around the father and son being                   movie, the two actors really do an
in total dismay and the ridiculous                amazing job. No one expected Viggo
transformations the actors have to take           to do a bad job, and he was on par.
to become the characters physically,              He didn’t surpass expectation, which                                                                      PHOTO COURTESY OF WWW.FILMOFILIA.COM
were beautifully done. Beautiful might            would have been nice since he stated        was meant for this role, as he broke                This movie will be a hit, and I’m sad to
not seem like the right word, since we            this would be his last film ever. He        everyone’s hearts with his whimpers             say it is because no one has read the book.
are talking about a world ripped apart            soon recanted his statements on             and cries throughout the film. The              It’s a typical blockbuster production of
by a catastrophe and all the characters           retiring, and we can all thank him          12-year-old has not been in any                 a great book, and it does no justice to
are no heavier than 150 lbs. (including           for that.                                   noticeable roles, but there is no doubt         Cormac McCarthy. Maybe the Coen
Viggo Mortensen), but the aesthetics of              On the other hand, we have yet           that The Road will show everyone that           brothers should have been hired again.
the movie are just breathtaking. With             another great child actor on our            he deserves to get any role available for
this film, John Hillcoat is definitely            hands. Kodi Smit-McPhee showed he           a child.                                        Grade: C




         Fantastic Mr. Fox                                                                               The Blind Side
                    Dahl Comes To Life In                                                              Story of the American Dream That,
                                                                                                             Ironically, Lacks Vision
                    This Diverting Delight
                                                                                                          by Chris Powers ’12                 audience the true sense of what Michael
            by Ryan Waxon ’12                        Once the farmers discover that it is                       A&E Staff                     went through growing up and just how
                 A&E Staff                        Mr. Fox who is robbing them by night,           Blind Side, based on the novel by Michael   inspiring his story is. With the help of the
    Fantastic Mr. Fox is one of the               the three seek revenge by trying to         Lewis, captures the story of Michael Oher,      Tuohy family Michael is able to flourish
most original films that I have seen              kill Mr. Fox and his family, destroying     a homeless teenager in Memphis who              and eventually become an NFL lineman.
this year. Director Wes Anderson                  their tree home and forcing them to         is given a second chance at life when he            The script and structure of the movie
was able to create a world through                hide underground. Mr. Fox must band         meets a woman named Leigh Anne Tuohy.           is phenomenal, but is complimented by
the art of stop motion animation                  together his friends and family to fight    It is based on the true story of Michael        the superb acting of Bullock and Aaron.
that is completely different from                 the farmers and reclaim their homes.        Oher, the Baltimore Ravens offensive            who gives a convincing performance of
the majority of animated features.                I won’t ruin the rest of the plot, but it   tackle, and his journey from a homeless         a troubled teen. The audience believes
Although Anderson and his co-writer               is very entertaining and my summary         teen to an NFL player. The Tuohy family         they are seeing the real Oher, as Aaron
Noah Bumbach take many liberties                  doesn’t do the film justice.                and Oher each share in a transformation—        perfectly captures Oher’s emotions and
with their adaptation of Roald Dahl’s                The backgrounds of the film              Oher becomes a star football player and         attitudes in the extreme situations he
classic novel, they are able to capture           look like amazing works of art, and         upstanding student, while the Tuohy             encounters.
the feeling of the original.                      everything about the film feels old. All    family ignores the adversity of the general         However, Bullock stands out as the
    Mr. Fox (George Clooney) is a reformed        the colors are faded a brownish yellow,     public to show the true meaning of family.      true star of the movie. As Leigh Anne, she
chicken thief who has settled down in the         and the film takes on a very autumn             Michael, played by newcomer Quinton         displays true courage and determination
English countryside with his wife Mrs. Fox        vibe. The color palette successfully        Aaron, is a homeless teen in Memphis            to change Michael’s life. Bullock finally
(Meryl Streep), and his accident-prone son,       lights up the screen and keeps every        whose mother is addicted to crack               is able to show her full potential as an
Ash (Jason Schwartzman). Bored with his           shot interesting.                           cocaine and left him to fend for himself        actress as she leaves her usual chick flick
life, Mr. Fox decides to reenter the chicken          The plot of the film allows for just    at an early age. A victim of the weak           and lame action roles. She may win an
       theft game and slowly begins to            about every cool-looking animated           education system, Michael is constantly         Academy Award for her performance
           wage war on three farmers:             shot possible. Many of them left me         in and out of schools until a local football    and rightfully deserves it.
               Walter Boggis (chickens),          wondering how they accomplished             coach sees his immense size (6’5”, 330              Although the movie was inspiring
                  Nathan Bunce (ducks             it, and how painstaking it must             lbs.) and offers Michael admission into a       and well done there are some things
                           and geese), and        have been to do it at 24 frames per         private high school. Michael still faces the    that could have been better. The first
                                  Franklin        second. Many of the chase scenes            struggle of reading and writing, as well        was the athleticism of Quinton Aaron;
                                  B e a n         were rumored to have taken three            as the uncertainty of where to sleep until      although he is of immense stature, he
                                 (turkeys         weeks to shoot, making every single         one rainy night when football booster           looks very out of shape and sluggish. It’s
                               and apples,        frame important.                            Leigh Tuohy (Sandra Bullock) offers her         hard to believe at times he is one of the
                               the       latter      Although the film is perfectly           household to him. After she witnesses his       top recruits in the country. The second
                                for making        acceptable for children, dealing with       condition, she takes him in and eventually      was the overpowering performance of
                                 cider).          themes such as sibling rivalry and          adopts him. Michael finally reaches             Sandra Bullock. She is phenomenal, but
                                                  winning a parent’s acceptance, the          stability in his life and begins to excel at    steals the spotlight from Aaron and the
                                                  film contains a lot of humor aimed          football and school with the help of the        story itself. The movie begins to center
                                                  at adults. This is especially true of       Tuohy family and Leigh in particular.           around Bullock because of her superb
                                                  Mr. Fox’s lawyer, the badger (Bill          Michael must prove to everyone at the           acting and diminishes the storyline.
                                                  Murray). Parents may also enjoy             school that he belongs there, as it is a        Besides these minor details the movie
                                                  the classic Wes Anderson-infused            predominantly white upper class school.         still maintained a high level of excellence.
                                                  soundtrack with songs from the              The Tuohy family ignores the animosity              I highly recommend this movie
                                                  Rolling Stones and the Beach Boys.          of their friends and locals as they support     to everyone because it appeals to all
                                                     Overall this film is great, and Wes      Michael through his struggles.                  ages. Anyone who watches the movie
                                                  Anderson certainly has a knack for              The movie shows the environment             will be moved by the inspiring story
                                                  animation. Coming from a director           Michael grew up in as a kid, as well as,        of Michael Oher as it exemplifies the
                                                  who hasn’t had a hit in a few years, this   the constant struggles he encounters. The       American dream. It is a feel good movie
                                                  film should reestablish Anderson has a      shots were well done as they showed             for everyone and destined to be one of
                                                  competent director.                         the ghetto of Memphis and Michael’s             the top movies of the year.
                                                                                              mother’s crack den, as well as the upper
                                                  Grade: A-                                   class neighborhood Michael eventually           Grade: B+
                                                                                              lives in. The extreme differences give the
18 The Cowl                                                     ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT                                                                 December 3, 2009



                    Bthe
                      eer
  Picks of the Week of Week
                       by Neil Andrew Francisco ’10
                                A&E Staff                                             Dogfish Head 60 Minute IPA
                                                                                                 by Chris Stadolnik ’10
                                                                                                      A&E Staff

 Movie: 25th Hour (2002)                                                          Brewery: Dogfish Head Craft Brewery
 Director: Spike Lee                                                              Style: American India Pale Ale
                                                                                  ABV: 6.0%
 Edward Norton has always                                                         Country of Origin: United States
 delivered strong performances.                                                   Region: Milton, Delaware
 Fight Club, American History X,
 and Rounders are just a few of                                                   Appearance: 60 pours a warm golden
 them. His strongest, however,                                                    orange and is topped by a bright white
 has to be in the Spike Lee Joint,                                                head, which dissipates quickly, leaving
 25th Hour. Norton plays Monty                                                    minimal lacing.
 Brogan, a convicted drug dealer,                                                 Smell: The hop aroma is very strong,
 who has one last day of freedom                                                  with a pronounced citrus bouquet up
 before serving a seven-year                                                      front fading into more subdued floral         Drinkability: This is a big beer.
 prison sentence. What would you                                                  notes in the background. The hops smell is    Despite a respectable 6.0% ABV and 60
 do if you had one day to be with                                                 balanced by the soft, rich malt undertones.   IBU it is subtlety stronger than labeled.
 the ones you love before you went                                                Taste: This beer tastes big, much             It would go well with foods of equally
 away for such a long time? Well,                                                 bigger than it is—nearly possessing           strong flavor, like curries (this is an
 Monty spends it with his friends,                                                the character of an imperial IPA. The         India Pale Ale after all) and foods in
 saying goodbyes to the ones                                                      malt sweetness is strongly pronounced         heavy cream sauces (white chowders,
 he loves. Just as anyone would                                                   and has a light caramel character to it.      chicken fried steak, etc.). It easily
 agree, friends are some of the                                                   The bitterness balances it nicely, but        overpowers most other dishes. 60 is
 most important people you will                                                   the hop oils linger on the tongue and         not really a session ale, but more a way
 ever meet. They’re there for you                                                 contribute to a lasting bitterness that       to begin the evening – a middle rung
 in the good times and the bad.                                                   doesn’t finish cleanly.                       on the bitterness ladder to climb down
                                                                                  Mouthfeel: The body is full and               from over the course of your rounds at
                                                                                  silky without being overly heavy. The         the pub.
                                                                                  carbonation is mild and contributes
                                                                                  little to the overall mouth feel.             Overall Grade: B+




                                                                                  In Vino Veritas
                                         Album: Troubadour
                                         By: K’Naan
                                         Back in February I heard the name
                                         K’naan and thought nothing of it.
                                         After hearing “Wavin’ Flag,” I was
                                         very impressed by his work. For
                                         those of you who don’t know, “Wavin’
                                         Flag” is the official song of the 2010                   Andresen Ruby Porto
                                         World Cup (which starts in less
                                         than 200 days!). Other songs, such
                                         as “I Come Prepared” and “Fatima”                by Chris Stadolnik ’10                pubs, where it was often served with
                                         make this an album to, at the very                    A&E Staff                        lemon (a favorite drink to this day).
                                         least, give an honest listening. Rap                                                      Nosing the glass reveals the
                                         is currently ruled by those who          Vintner: J.H. Andresen Suers. Lda.            strongly pronounced alcohol note
                                         talk about money and apple-bottom        Vintage: 2007                                 which is backed by the smell of jammy
                                         jeans. What ever happened to             Appellation: “Douro”                          cherry fruit preserves. It is very rich
                                         meaningful lyrics? K’naan delivers       Style: Ruby Port Blend                        and has strong legs. The body is full
                                         those. Give this a listen if you like    Grape/Fruit Content: Five red Portuguese      and slightly syrupy with some notes of
                                         Mos Def, 88keys, or Common. You          varieties and grape distillates of unknown    raisin and cherry, and there is a faint
                                         won’t be disappointed.                   varieties                                     taste of baker’s chocolate. The finish
                                                                                  Region: Douro                                 is sweet but there is a slight burn on
                                                                                  Average Cost: $10 to $13 per 750ml            the back of the palate, not uncommon
                                                                                                                                for a fortified wine. Altogether this
                                                                                  bottle
                                                                                                                                wine is very pleasant and complex and
                                                                                                                                maintains a good overall harmony of
                                                                                     Port wine is a very queer animal.
                                                                                                                                flavors for an inexpensive port.
                                                                                  There are several other fortified wines,
 Book: Shutter Island                                                                                                              Ruby port is the cheapest and most
                                                                                  including Sherry, vermouth, Marsala,
 By: Dennis Lehane                                                                                                              commonly available and consumed
                                                                                  and Madeira as well as lower end
                                                                                                                                style of port, which is a staple in
                                                                                  styles. But port is its own beast—
 When Martin Scorsese makes                                                                                                     Portuguese households (where our
                                                                                  generally much richer, sweeter, and
 a film, I become obsessed with                                                                                                 grandparents think it is an appropriate
                                                                                  smoother than the other varieties
 everything revolving around it.                                                                                                substitute for cough syrup). But rather
                                                                                  as well as possessing a higher AVB
 When Shutter Island was pushed                                                                                                 than use it as an antiquated, albeit
                                                                                  (around 19.5% or slightly higher).
 back to February, my autumn film                                                                                               effective, home remedy, serve a ruby
                                                                                  There are several styles of port wine—
 season took a huge hit. If you are                                                                                             port with a fresh baked tart, pastry,
                                                                                  tawny, ruby, pink, and white—all of
 like me, you were probably just as                                                                                             cheesecake, or crème brulee. Ruby
                                                                                  which must be produced in Portugal
 disappointed with the quality of                                                                                               port is well suited to a plate of soft
                                                                                  and fortified with grape distillates also
 films in what has become known                                                                                                 rind Portuguese cheese. It also tempers
                                                                                  from Portugal.
 as “Oscar Season.” After seeing the                                                                                            strong sharp cheeses well, such as
                                                                                     It is generally served as a dessert
 trailer for the film, I was curious                                                                                            English farmhouse styles.
                                                                                  wine. But it has also become common
 as to how the story would pan out,                                                                                                If you’re used to the Californian and
                                                                                  practice, especially in Great Britain, for
 so I read the book. To say the least,                                                                                          Australian fruit-bomb-red wines this
                                                                                  port to be served with cigars (usually
 I was amazed. It’s a psychological                                                                                             might be a good sweet wine alternative.
                                                                                  accompanied by coffee).
 drama of great proportions. The                                                                                                Bear in mind though, this is not a wine
                                                                                     Port wine is known as the
 film’s tagline really fits the novel                                                                                           to drink in mass quantities. It is nearly
                                                                                  Englishman’s wine. It was imported
 well, and I am more excited to see                                                                                             double the strength of other table wines
                                                                                  to England during the reign of King
 Shutter Island than I was before.                                                                                              and contains a proportionally high
                                                                                  William II because of an embargo he
 Lesson learned! Nothing really is                                                                                              level of sulfites, all of which contribute
                                                                                  placed on French wines. Portugal, by a
 what it seems.                                                                                                                 to one wicked hangover.
                                                                                  windfall, replaced France as the major
                                                                                  exporter of wine to England and port
                                                                                                                                Grade: B-
                                                                                  wine became very popular in English
December 3, 2009                                                      ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT                                                                                                      The Cowl 19




    Them Crooked Vultures
              Rock Icons Team Up With Mediocre Results
          by Jorge Lucas ’12                 of the Stone Age than any of the
              A&E Staff                      other members’ projects, and
                                             turns out to be a lesser addition
    When the gods of rock decide to          to his discography at that. In this
join forces and collaborate on an            regard, Them Crooked Vultures
unanticipated, explosive album,              comes off as rather superfluous
we lowly people expect nothing               for everyone involved. Had none
less than a thunderous show in the           of their names been attached,
sky, complete with lightning bolts           however, the album would have
and tridents. You can understand             been perfectly acceptable. For any
my disappointment, then, when                rock enthusiast, Them Crooked
three of the biggest names in rock           Vultures is a pleasurable listen—
music found themselves under one             this debut is rife with infectious
band title with rather unimpressive          riffs. Homme’s lyrics are also well-
results. What else could one expect          written and poetic.
from the dream team that is Dave                Grohl, returning to his drummer
Grohl (Nirvana, Foo Fighters), Josh          roots, does a fine job of providing
Homme (Queens of the Stone Age),             powerful rhythms, as well as
and John Paul Jones (Led Zeppelin),          lending his vocals for some
who teamed up to call themselves             interesting harmonies, particularly
Them Crooked Vultures, except                on the track “Reptiles.” But if there
pure, face-melting magic?                    was anyone responsible for saving
    The fact is that the notion of these     this experiment from disaster, it
                                                                                          PHOTO COURTESY OF WWW.MLK.COM/PRESSE

three playing together is titillating        must have been Zeppelin’s brilliant          influences are evident in other                                               Age, Foo Fighters, or obviously Led
and downright mind-blowing, and              Jones. Boasting a vast arsenal of            songs, such as “Bandoliers” and                                               Zeppelin). Rather than a brilliant
they knew it. So Them Crooked                instruments, including bass, piano,          “Elephants,” though not to any                                                collaboration, the trio has instead
Vultures teased the world by                 keyboard, and mandolin, Jones                overwhelming extent.                                                          become an instance of too many
playing a few shows and festivals,           injects the music with occasional               Unfortunately, Them Crooked                                                cooks spoiling the broth. If they
and opening for Arctic Monkeys to            breaths of fresh air that could have         Vultures suffer from too much                                                 choose to keep playing together, I
get their feet wet (and to send fans         led them in a new direction, but it          anticipation   and   star  power.                                             hope their next venture proves to be
reeling with this godly creation)            seems they failed to heed the street         Without the raised expectations                                               as exciting and ground-breaking as
before finally releasing their self-         signs. The last track, “Spinning in          created by their big names, the                                               we’d expect from them.
titled debut album.                          Daffodils,” opens with a beautiful           album could have been a relatively
    The songs’ heavy, driving beats          classical piano, only to segue into          enjoyable experience (though I’d                                                Grade: C+
and lethargic vocals are more                yet another guitar-heavy head-               probably advise you to just get
reminiscent of Homme’s Queens                banger. Jones’s progressive rock             something by Queens of the Stone




       GLITTER AND DOOM LIVE
           New Tom Waits Album Well Worth the Waits
        by Chris Stadolnik ’10               Waits’ Glitter and Doom tour of the             This is the best collection of                                                Requisite Recordings:
             A&E Staff                       U.S. and Europe in 2008. Surprisingly,       performances you will never get to see.
                                             the first disc sounds “like one evening’s    Glitter and Doom Live is the only choice
   Tom Waits is one of the most truly        performance, even though the 17              in new music this year if you have any                                                Closing Time (1973)
innovative and experimental musicians        tracks are selected from 10 cities: from     intention of listening to something                                                 Melencholy and melodic
writing today. His exceedingly eclectic      Paris to Birmingham, Tulsa to Milan,         that is truly on the cutting edge of                                                   barroom balads.
catalogue stretches back 36 years            and Atlanta to Dublin,” according to         artistic performance. And along with
and includes nearly every style of           his Web site. The selected numbers           the music you get the wit and wisdom                                              Heart of Saturday Night (1974)
music from piano-driven vocal jazz to        beautifully encapsulate the more             of the ages on a space age metal disc;                                             Bohemian club-jazz tales.
percussive atonal arrangements. His          mature writings of a career musician         both are well worth your time and well
lyrics are full of cloying melancholic       who has been breaking new ground             worth the money.                                                                  Nighthawks at the Diner (1975)
ballads, disparately charming stories of     for nearly four decades.                                                                                                       One of the greatest live vocal
Skid Row, bizarre scenes of old weird            Sonically it isn’t all there. The        Grade: B+                                                                            jazz albums recorded
America and alluring compositions            mixing isn’t the best I’ve heard of
that defy description.                       any Waits album I’ve listened                                                                                                   Heartattack And Vine (1980)
                                                                                                                                 All Quotations From WWW.TOMWAITS.COM




   Waits sounds like he has been             to, and not nearly                                                                                                              The grittiest of the middle
tearing the filters off his cigarettes and   the best of most                                                                                                                  period Waits albums.
gargling with bourbon since the day          available        these
he turned 16. And he sings with all          days. This has                                                                                                                  Swordfishtrombones (1983)
the fire and intensity of a flesh starved    nothing to do with                                                                                                           Wild musings of beat poety set to
predator romancing his last meal from        the performances                                                                                                               complext rythmic structres.
behind three inches of bulletproof           of any of the
glass. The sound is savage and wicked        musicians, least of all                                                                                                             Rain Dogs (1984)
and like no one else.                        Waits’. A great many large                                                                                                      An album that defies style
   He is also an amazingly funny and         venues are designed to                                                                                                                 and genre.
charming story teller and has made           hold large crowds and be
a habit of recording his “wit and            versatile not necessarily to                                                                                                           Alice (2002)
wisdom, strange but true tales, and          provide good acoustics. It                                                                                                        A return to form for a
more imponderables on topics as far          is certainly disappointing,                                                                                                          modern master.
ranging as the origin of consciousness,      especially since Nighthawks
the sexuality of Christ, and the             at the Diner, his first live album, was so
lonely journey of the male seahorse”         wonderfully engineered and mastered.
beginning with Nighthawks at the Diner           The second disc is a 35-minute,
in 1975. Glitter and Doom Live includes      53-second “compendium called TOM
a second disk devoted entirely to his        TALES, which is a selection of the
manic and mirthful musings.                  comic bromides, strange musings, and
   Glitter and Doom Live is a long           unusual facts that Tom traditionally
overdue collection of live material          shares with his audience during the
(the first since Big Time, 1988). And it     piano set. Waits’ topics range from
certainly doesn’t disappoint.                the ritual of insects to the last dying
   All of the tracks were recorded on        breath of Henry Ford.”
20 The Cowl                                                         ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT                                                                  December 3, 2009




     Providence College                                                          Glengarry Glen Ross
                                                                            Student Production Takes the Stage at Smith


      Musicians,
                                                                                   by Sarah Dombroski ’13                        for its relevance. Glengarry Glen Ross is based
                                                                                          A&E Staff                              on the struggle for economic survival in
                                                                                                                                 spite of the callousness of big business and
                                                                              The letters and words, “A, B, C, Always            the pitfalls of capitalism. The dilapidated

               Artists,                                                   Be Closing” garnish the wipe board in the
                                                                          back of the Bowab Theatre. The dark printing
                                                                                                                                 Chicago real estate office could be any white-
                                                                                                                                 collar organization in which middle-aged

             &                                                            makes the letters almost look like shadows
                                                                          against their stark white background in the
                                                                                                                                 men find themselves faced with sudden and
                                                                                                                                 possibly permanent unemployment, and the



         Photographers
                                                                          dimly lit corner where the board stands, and           language used throughout the entirety of
                                                                          immediately intrigue me as I make my way               Ross helps to pinpoint the way that audience
                                                                          inside. Glengarry Glen Ross, the play from             members can relate to those on stage, in a
                                                                          which the line was drawn, has the same effect          rather coarse fashion.
                                                                          on its audience. Director John Kalife ’11 is              “It’s certainly not The Sound of Music, I
                                                                          the one responsible for bringing this Tony-            can tell you that much,” Kalife jokes. The
                                                                          nominated play to Providence College.                  play is composed of a rather different kind
                                                                              Kalife’s reproduction is based on the 1982         of language, affectionately called “Mamet
        If you would like to be featured                                  play written by David Mamet. The play
                                                                          depicts bits and pieces of two days in the lives
                                                                                                                                 Speak” for the man who created it. Given
                                                                                                                                 Mr. Mamet’s experience in such a hellish

        in The Cowl, send us an e-mail
                                                                          of five distressed and desperate Chicago real          workplace, he knows the way these people
                                                                          estate agents. All are barely holding on and           talk and turns their jargon into a language
                                                                          readily prepared to engage in any number               of his own. His dialogue has a kind of logic;
        at cowl.ae@gmail.com telling us                                   of unethical, illegal, and dishonorable
                                                                          acts, stretching from lies to burglary, to sell
                                                                                                                                 a cadence that allows people to arrive in
                                                                                                                                 triumph at the ends of sentences that we
        who you are, what you do, and                                     undesirable real estate to prospective buyers.
                                                                          Mamet used his experiences in a Chicago
                                                                                                                                 could not possibly have imagined to end
                                                                                                                                 in such a way. There is great energy in
           why you should be known!                                       real estate office, where he worked in the late
                                                                          1960s, as a base for his play, which premiered
                                                                                                                                 each and every line; a genuine enthusiasm
                                                                                                                                 that is not necessarily produced because of
                                                                          at the National Theatre in London on Sept.             what they’re saying, but because it’s written
                                                                          21, 1983. The play opened on Broadway on               to be said. You can see the joy in the way



                                                      ou!”
                                                                          Mar. 25, 1984, and closed on Feb. 17, 1985,            these actors get their teeth into the lines, as
                                                                          and in its short run was nominated for four            opposed to the monotony of flat dialogue


                                                 lp y
                                                                          Tony awards.                                           that only serves the purpose of prolonging


                       e, he
                                                                              Its great effect on the theatre world gave         an already bland story.
                                                                          Glengarry Glen Ross license to be converted               This energetic and zealously directed


                    pm
                                                                          to fit the big screen. Premiering in 1992              play is performed in the same light, with


     “Hel
                                                                          with a hard-hitting cast containing the likes          every cast member sharing Kalife’s genuine
                                                                          of Pacino, Lemmon, Spacey, and Baldwin                 excitement about their project. The cast
                                                                          (Alec, that is), the film adaptation was a great       consists of Nedzer Erilus, the hall director
                                                                          success as well. Kalife’s rendition has drawn          of the Suites, John Kalife, also a member of
                                                                          on both, leaving his creation a captivating            the cast, Tom Celli ’11, Liam McCartney ’11,
                                                                          collaboration whose sound byte would be                Cam Durant ’11, Brian Gay ’11, Ryan Keenan
                                                                          something like this: “Five Chicago real estate         ’13, and Kevin Peloquin ’13. The play will
                                                                          salesmen on the verge of hopelessness faced            be performed on Dec. 5 and 6 (Saturday at
                                                                          with a contest: First place is a Cadillac El           8:00 p.m. and Sunday at 2:00 p.m.) in the
                                                                          Dorado, second place is a set of steak knives,         Bowab Theatre. As I have said before, this
                                                                          and third place is you’re fired.”                      show is indeed a labor of love for all of those
                                                                              Kalife calls his experience running                involved in its production, and everyone
                                                                          Glengarry Glen Ross “a dream,” and is very             should watch this timeless classic performed
                                                                          passionate about the chance to bring this              by their peers.
                                                                          play to PC for so many reasons, particularly




                         EDITOR VS. EDITOR
                                         This Week: Favorite Clothing Store
 Catherine Northington                                                                                                                Nahuel Fanjul-Arguijo
 Favorite Clothing Store: H&M                                                                            Favorite Clothing Store: J. Crew

 Her Thoughts: I sweat H&M. Real bad. I want to make                                                     His Thoughts: I sweat J. Crew. Real bad... sike, I just
 myself clear: If this establishment were human, I would                                                 wanted to make fun of Catherine for using that phrase
 have intimate relations with it. And who could blame                                                    for the 13 millionth time in a day. But really, I couldn’t
 me?! H&M has everything you will ever need, catering to                                                 think of anywhere else to choose from since it might be
 a vast array of styles—ranging from the flagrantly funky                                                one of three places where I actually shop. J. Crew has
 to the savvy sophisticate. The greatest thing about H&M                                                 everything I need, from jeans to nice cords and from
 is its eclecticism; you can by no means pinpoint a single                                               awesome button-ups to comfy v-necks. I regularly wear
 “type” of clothing found in the store. I can feel my eyes                                               a full J. Crew outfit, including a tie. And I only note that
 start to glaze over as I paw admiringly through the H&M                                                 because their ties are my favorite articles at the store;
                                                                                                         the fact that they just added a cornucopia of bowties
 formalwear section. I’ll come out of my trance an hour later
                                                                                                         to their online store only makes me wish more that my
 and realize that I’m three dresses the richer for it. Oops.
                                                                                                         debit card had a higher balance than $6.19.
 But you know what? It doesn’t even matter, because this
 store is so delightfully affordable—while still not lacking                                             His Views of Catherine: First of all, if Catherine is
 in the realm of craftsmanship.                                                                          going to judge my “casual wear,” then she shouldn’t
                                                                                                         do that while wearing a nice jacket from H&M and
 Her Views of Nahuel: J. Crew is quite the classy choice                                                 workout shorts; it just doesn’t go, I’m sorry. And yes,
 there, Nahuel. It makes me sort of curious as to why you so                                             H&M is one of my other top choices for shopping, but
 often don those unseemly sleeveless biker tees in the Cowl                                              that went downhill when I came to Providence and
 office. Regardless: despite the style offered by this particu-                                          the flippin’ Providence Place Mall H&M does not have
 lar clothier, you can’t deny the impracticality of it. I’d rath-                                        a guys section. And the lack of online shopping just
 er not pay $56 for a pair of solid black socks, thank you.                                              pushes me farther from the store and towards my all-
 The craftsmanship is there, sure, but in the end I’d rather                                             time favorite J. Crizzle.
 dress in style without damaging my already-thin wallet in
 the process. (P.S.: Nahuel, I’m wearing gym shorts because
 I drag my ass to the gym every now and then, unlike a
 certain lethargic Cowl editor I happen to know.)                                                          PHOTO COURTESY GOOGLE IMAGES
December 3, 2009                                                       ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT                                                                          The Cowl 21




                         Get Your Holly Jolly On
               There’s No Place Like Providence For The Holidays
                                                      by Claire Pevoto ’10
                                                           A&E Staff
Trinity Repertory
Company’s                                                                                      Christmas at the
A Christmas Carol                                                                              Shrine
                              ater
Now through Dec. 27, Chace The                                                                 Now through Jan.
                                                                                                                   3,
Tickets $10 – $65                              Festival Ballet                                National Shrine of
                                                                                                                    Our Lady of La
http://www.trinityrep.com.                     Providence’s The Nutcracker                    Salette in Attleboro
                                                                                                                    , MA
                                               Dec. 11-13, Providence                         Free admission, but
                                                                                                                  donations welcome
    The renowned Trinity Repertory             Performing Arts Center                         Directions and mor
                                      A                                                                            e in                   Christmas Strolls
Company’s annual staging of                    Tickets $18-83                                 http://www.lasalette formation
                 ol is a Providence            http://www.ppacri.org.                                               -shrine.org/          on Hope Street
Christmas Car                                                                                 Christmas.html.
                                       h                                                                                                  and Federal Hill
tradition 33 years in the making. Eac
                                 on the                                                                                                   Hope Street—Dec. 5, 11:00 to 5:00
year promises a new twist                         Even non-aficionados of dance can              This 10-acre maje
                                      es                                                                              stic display of     Federal Hill—Dec. 6, 2:00 to 5:00
classic tale, which brings audienc             appreciate ballet at Christmastime.            over 300,000 light
                      again. Last year’s       The Nutcracker is a tried-and-true                                  s is sure to get       Free, but bring money for goodies
back again and                                                                                visitors in the fes
                                                                                                                    tive spirit. The
                                        h                                                                                                 and gifts!
show gave viewers a fright wit                 story that brings together fantasy, art,       Shrine’s decorated
                                                                                                                   grounds remind
 the eerie music and flying      ghosts.       and sugar plums, appealing to the              us of the true meani
                                     itta                                                                           ng of Christmas,          Explore these two favorite
 This year’s new director, Birg                dreamer in all of us. Festival Ballet          with angels, nativ
                  hasized in the show’s        Providence puts on a show that is                                   ity scenes, and        Providence areas at the jolliest time
 Victorson, emp                                                                               more proclaiming
                                       ch                                                                        the birth of Jesus.      of year. Each event will feature
 press release that, “there’s so mu            lavish in set design and costuming,           It might be a dr
                                 need to                                                                          ive, but a walk         free seasonal food and drinks from
 about the story that people                   and features flawless dance and               through this illum
                                        ic                                                                         inative land is        participating vendors, and special
  see, especially in these econom             music that remain true to the classic          worth the trip. Th
                   just be reminded that      ballet, but never fail to excite and                               e lights come on         sales at a variety of stores, all beneath
  times, so as to                                                                            every evening thro
                                      not                                                                        ugh early January        the festive glow of Christmas lights.
  life isn’t about having money or            enchant the audience. The company             from 5:00 to 9:00
                                 the day,                                                                         p.m. Bundle up          The Hope Street event also promises
  having money. At the end of                 features dancers who have come                and bring some
                                      ng,                                                                       thermoses of hot          carolers and a cameo made by S.
  it’s just about being the most lovi         from all over the world to dance with         cocoa; you won’t wa
                     sionate person that      Festival Ballet, and has also toured                                nt the cold air to      Claus himself, while Federal Hill
  caring, compas                                                                            shorten your stroll.
                                     seen                                                                                                 will be visited by horse-and-buggy
   you can be.” If you have never             internationally. And guys, just a
                                                                                                                                          rides and will host a tree lighting at
   a  Trinity Rep show, don’t miss the        hint—dinner and surprise tickets to
                                          e                                                                                                4:00 p.m. Hey, it’s the holidays—go
   consistently exceptional performanc        the ballet make a fabulous Christmas
                     as tale of hope and      gift for a special someone.                                                                  all out and hit up both festivals for
   of this Christm
                                                                                                                                           the ultimate wintry weekend.
   forgiveness.




        Dance Show                                                                           Retro Corner
         Preview                                                                                           This Week: Rookie of the Year
                                                                                                by Catherine Northington ’12
                                                                                                           A&E Editor
     The Dance Company’s Fall Performance:                                                      This is it. 1994’s finest.
                                                                                                This film has everything you
               Toe-Tapping Fun!                                                              could ever ask for in a mid-’90s
                                                                                             blockbuster: that irresistibly awkward
                                                                                             intermingling of B-list Hollywood
        by Alison DeNisco ’11                 class on Tuesday evenings that typically       actors, an unconvincing (yet cheesily
              A&E Staff                       centers around modern dance and ballet.        poignant)       emotional      storyline,
                                                 Cusack, a member of the Dance               a titillating glimpse of “the big
   The Providence College Dance               Company since her freshman year                leagues”…and Gary Busey.
Company will be performing their              at PC, says she is looking forward to             The      film     revolves    around
fall show on Friday and Saturday,             finally turning these six-day-a-week           12-year-old Chicago native Henry
Dec. 4 and 5, at 8:00 p.m. in the             rehearsals into a performance that is          Rowengartner, who breaks his arm
Angell Blackfriars Theatre in the             sure to impress the audience.                  during a Little League baseball game.
Smith Center for the Arts.                       There are 25 dancers in the                 Upon healing, Henry discovers that
   For the upcoming fall performance,         company, who represent every class             his arm has gained incredible strength,        Just as Henry is basking in the bounty
the company has brought in                    at PC. This marks the first year that          allowing him to pitch baseballs with        of his successes with the Cubs, he learns
professional choreographers from              the company has been co-ed.                    precision and unrivaled force, at           that Jack is planning to sell his contract
the New England area, under the                  “One of the new additions is                speeds up to 95 miles per hour (I’m         to the New York Yankees without
direction of Dr. Wendy Oliver, chair of       a young male dancer, which has                 sure there’s some kind of scientific        his knowledge. Consequently—in a
the Department of Theatre, Dance, and         brought our company to a new level,”           evidence to back this up. Maybe.).          particularly kickass scene—Henry and
Film.                                         said Cusack.                                      Immediately, Henry is signed by          his mom throw Jack out of the house.
   “Working with these professional               “My favorite part of the process is        his hometown Chicago Cubs, with                Despite that temporary setback,
choreographers gives us a greater             finally getting to work in the theatre,”       his mother’s pushy boyfriend Jack           the season continues with a barrage
variety of dance styles and the ability to    said Katelyn Uyehara, a member since           signing on as manager. Henry joins          of successes for the Cubs, due to
work under the guidance of instructors        her sophomore year. “We work all               the Chicago Cubs lineup, playing            the pitching prowess of both Henry
from other professional companies,”           semester creating pieces and it is exciting    alongside his idol, pitcher Chet            and Chet. The movie culminates in
said Dance Company president                  to see the final product come to life with     “Rocket” Steadman (Busey), with             an especially dramatic sequence, in
Melissa Cusack ’10. “This semester            the lighting and costume design.”              equal parts awe and intimidation.           which Chet and Henry pitch the Cubs
mostly centers around modern pieces.             “With this show in particular, the             Steadman is an aging pitcher in the      to a thrilling World Series victory
However, it also includes a more              diversity of talent on the company             twilight of his career; he knows he’s       over the New York Mets.
contemporary ballet piece as well as an       has allowed us to present several              past his prime. Initially, Steadman            Everything is tied up in a neat little
a cappella tap number.”                       different styles of dance,” she added.         harbors resentment towards the young        package at the end of the film, when
   “Each fall semester is unique as           “We are all grateful that we have the          Henry, who rolls onto the team in a         Henry’s mom and Chet Steadman
we have new guest choreographers,”            resources and opportunity to work              wave of publicity and media adoration.      suddenly realize that they are madly
said vice president Katelyn Uyehara           with professional artists to showcase             Yet, as time passes, the middle-         in love. Touchingly, Henry is one
’10. “The fall semester is always             dance to the Providence College                aged pitching legend forms a                World Series ring—and one father—
different than the spring, which is a         community.”                                    remarkably strong bond with his             richer at the film’s conclusion.
student choreography showcase.”                  Tickets for both nights of the show         pitching protégé. Steadman grows               I’m at a loss for words as to express
   The company holds practices Sunday         are available in the box office in the         fond of the young Henry, and begins         how awesome this movie is, so I’ll just
through Friday, with an extra technique       Smith Center. They are $5 for students.        acting more as a devoted mentor than        conclude with the best line from the
                                                                                             a resentful competitor.                     entire film: “FUNKY BUTT LOVIN’!”
22 The Cowl   CLUBS & ORGS                                     December 3, 2009




                        PC Outdoor Adventure Club
                        General Ski Trip Meeting, Moore Hall III
                            Tuesday, December 8th, 8 pm
                             Come and find out about our ski trips!!
                                  **STUDENT DISCOUNTS**

                                   January 30 – Mount Snow
                                      February 20 - Loon
                                      March 28 - Killington
                        Portfolio                                                                                                                                               Page 23
                                                                                                                                                                    December 3, 2009



The Man and the Nightmare Machine
           by C.H. Steampunk                      I was taken aback at his change of          destination. He pulled the large door             the air from his arm and a noise filled
              Portfolio Staff                  character, and let him take the watch in       to the boardinghouse open with ease               the room, which sounded like water
                                               hand as he pulled his glasses off with         and we proceeded up an imperceptible              boiling in a teapot. Pulling off his
                 Fiction
                                               his other. A cloud of steam rose behind        number of stairs until we reached the             jacket, he held out his hand for my
                                               him, but again I couldn’t see exactly          door to his apartment.                            watch which I tremblingly offered. He
   A cloud of steam obscured my                where from. Brushing it off as I had              Pushing open the door, he strode               took it, and deftly unscrewed its back
view of the stranger at the end of the         before, I gave a small chuckle.                through the room with confidence as               plate, revealing the inner workings.
room, but not so much that I couldn’t             “Yes, quite new, but I am having            I stood stupidly in the illuminated                  “Ah, perfect,” he said with a low sigh
see his top hat on the bar in front of         some trouble with it. Has a nasty habit        doorway, unsure of the darkness.                  of pleasure, “exactly the parts I need.”
him, and the fact that he was rather           of stopping more often than it should.            He chuckled, “Oh, silly me, I often               “Parts?” I questioned, “Parts for
underdressed for the weather. What             Not too sure what I should do with it.”        forget how much you people need                   what exactly?”
looked like a simple tweed cloak                  He brought his eyes up to meet              light in your lives.”                                “Why for me,” he said with a
over a casual three piece contrasted           mine, and for a moment I saw spots;               Pausing to consider the odd                    chuckle, as if this was the most
sharply with my own outfit, which              they again seemed to glow more than            comment as he lit several lamps, I                normal of all things. And as he spoke,
consisted of a heavy topcoat and scarf         I would think possible, but his smile          couldn’t help but notice the Spartan              I saw his eyes; it seemed for the first
to protect my neck from the wind. I                                                                                                             time. He had no iris, no pupil, merely
could not see any pipe on his person,                                                                                                           small windows of yellow light. I
but merely attributed the steam to                                                                                                              looked down at his hand, and noticed
one of the patrons around him. I did                                                                                                            that as he rolled up his shirt sleeve I
see that his eyes, however, were an                                                                                                             saw not skin, but brass shining in the
intense shade of yellow, and seemed                                                                                                             dull light. Cogs worked perceptibly
to glow in the smoky shadows of the                                                                                                             together as more steam burst from
bar. This struck me, and the fact that                                                                                                          his body with a hiss. I was left in
I had run out of matches was all the                                                                                                            awe. This man’s entire right arm,
more reason to take a trip down, drink                                                                                                          and apparently his eyes, had been
in hand, and see what was going on.                                                                                                             changed. Modified might be a better
   Adjusting my vest, I squeezed                                                                                                                term, for I saw the intricate workings
between the various gentlemen at                                                                                                                of some sort of robotics where human
various levels of intoxication and                                                                                                              flesh and all its muscles usually
suddenly found the man I had been                                                                                                               were. I was awestruck as I stared;
seeking right before my eyes.                                                                                                                   wondering if this was real or merely
   He nodded to me as he stuck out                                                                                                              some strange nightmare. It was as if
his hand to firmly grip mine, “Jack                                                                                                             someone had taken the technology
Smithson,” he said.                                                                                                                             necessary to make a train run or
     I noticed his thick glasses over a                                                                                                         to create a threshing machine and
physiognomy devoid of hair, as well                                                                                                             grafted it with human flesh and bone
as the chill of his hands. Apparently                                                                                                           to create some sort of hybrid.
his lack of jacket was for no physical                                                                                                             “I see you’re rather surprised.
reason but more of a mental challenge.                                                                                                          But I suppose it’s no different than
   I nursed my hand after his nearly                                                                          PHOTO COURTESY CAROL KRAMBERGER
                                                                                                                                                the problem you were having with
bone-breaking handshake, but shook it          quickly distracted me from thinking            qualities of his rooms. I could see only          your watch. The human body just
off, “Abraham Wesley. New to the area?”        about it too much more.                        a bed, and shelves upon shelves of                has a tendency to…stop more often
   He laughed at my conversation                  “Come with me back to my home               books. Before me lay a table, though it           than it should. So I’ve made several
starter, “Been in this part of London          and we will see if I can’t fix it. Tinkering   looked as if no one had eaten upon it             upgrades to my own. But it certainly
longer than most.”                             with things like this happens to be a…         in quite some time. It was littered with          isn’t perfect, and I’ve still a need
   I waited for him to continue the            hobby of mine.”                                cogs and chains, hammer, brass plates,            for new parts every so often. Much
conversation, but his cold hand seemed to         Before I could argue he had pulled          metal tube pieces, and what appeared              easier to steal what you need than
belie more than just his physical condition.   me outside and into a Hansom,                  to be several pieces to a boiler. In              buy, now isn’t it?”
As I pulled out my pocket watch to check       which quickly trundled off down                addition, throughout the room stood                  With these words, he struck me
the time, his eyes suddenly lit up and he      the cobblestoned street. I tugged              large buckets of coal, though there was           hard across my crown, and as I
reached his hand out for the chain.            my jacket collar up close around my            no fireplace in sight.                            fell to the floor my eyes fluttered,
   “Is that a Simmons? 1860, with the          neck as the wind whistled across                  My companion turned, and as I                  blurring my vision of this man…or
new style face and new interior design?”       the street, but we soon reached our            watched, steam seemed to pour into                rather of this machine.


 Escape to the Center of the Universe
                                                                                                                                                                          e ri ng
                                                                                                                                                                 ov
              by Ira Tulive                    park bench that allows my gaze to              rush, the lunch hour, and the evening
              Portfolio Staff                  see on forever.                                rush hour to allow a person to think. A



                                                                                                                                                             isc
                                                  I create stories. The tale of the man in    tree blocks the golden warm sun from
                  Fiction                      the pinstriped suit, knotting his fingers      baking my pale forehead. Instead,
                                               nervously in the tether of his tie as his      talons of shadow etch cold across my
                                                                                              face as these fables appear within the


                                                                                                                                                  D Pen
    The place, a singular section of           mind replays the previous night’s affair
the expansive world known as Earth             with the woman in the red dress. She           recesses of my tranquil mind. I have
where I can feel completely calm, yet          had looked so alone and he didn’t look         called it my place, a tiny seat within
fear everything around me. Hidden in a         at all like he was married. The story of       the United States, sitting on the North
dark spot of the universe is our beacon        the elderly couple, who own the flower         American continent, over the waters of
                                                                                              planet Earth, on the globe dangling in
                                                                                                                                                                    Names
of humanity, the sphere spinning on            shop across the street on the busiest
tilted axes and hovering in the sheer          corner of the intersection, grows from         the universe on an invisible string. It
abyss. I stand, a single unit of compiled      the past onward, my mind discovering           is only three minutes from the rest of
organisms and complicated evolution,           their lives from the beginning of their        my life, three minutes that carry me
alone in the world with nothing but the        relationship. The man growls terms             to school, three minutes that carry me
clothes on my back and the knowledge           of slurred Italian as disrespecting            home. Yet I spend unfathomable hours
in my mind.                                    teenagers on monstrous skateboards             in the middle of those two places,                 This week, the writers
    I’m watching life pass before              ruin his newest arrangement, his               frozen in the median of my life on that
my eyes in a mysterious place so               wife the soothing hand that caresses           park bench.                                               of the Portfolio
different from the next that one blink         his feelings away with loving and                  Sitting in the middle of my own
could change its stability, its memory.        foreign words. Their story extends and         life, I lose it. My life is put on hold              Section have chosen
People scuttle around me, guiding              intermingles with others, the lives of         as my creativity leaps at the chance
themselves through the crowd of                their customers, the life of their teenage     to break from the mundane reality                   pseudonyms to write
pedestrians and cars, clinging to              grandson with the secret smoking               my mind sits in everyday. The people
the daily sustenance they hold each            habit, the family life of the surveying        participating in their own forms of                under. Can you guess
morning: a styrofoam cup of coffee, a          policeman. Not one seems to end. Ever.         reality are nothing but characters with
cell phone glued to an ear, a briefcase           Tales come so easily when I sit alone       amazing stories. I always find a sense            which writer is which?
used more like a battering ram than            on the rickety bench. It had been              of place on that bench and comfort too.
a carrying case. I do not move, but            placed in a peculiar position, sitting far     I find that sense of place and comfort
rather choose to watch from the place          back from the street, just far enough          more because of my imagination’s
I hold close to my heart, an ordinary          away from the ruckus of the morning            tendency to just escape.
24 The Cowl                                                           PORTFOLIO                                                                   December 3, 2009


                                          Gym-goers Guide to Genres
                                                by the Early Bird                 Then there are the Tweeners, who          percent. Workouts are for life. It’s
                                                 Portfolio Staff               (I’m convinced) secretly (or not so          about honor. Dignity. Man love.


   Aphelion                                          Essay                     secretly) have Miley Cyrus on their             And indeed, Stegosauri go about
                                                                               iPods and enjoy watching Disney              selecting a workout partner much as
                                                                               specials in the safety of their dorm         one would ask a romantic interest out
                                       I enjoy going to the gym. I really      rooms. They generally sport retina-          on a date.
        by Edgar Allen Foe          do. It’s not just about the sweet          meltingly bright t-shirts, ponytails,           “So, man, you normally work out at
          Portfolio Staff           televisions attached to every cardio       and color-coordinated sneakers and           this time?”
                                    machine, or the row upon row of            shorts. They like to travel in packs,           “Yeah, bro, totally. I’m a big morning
                                    weight equipment, or even seeing           and loiter around a single machine           bencher.”
                                    frightened-looking freshmen attempt        much like northwestern Indian tribes            “Yeah, yeah, me too. Hey, what
 Break free                         to navigate the workout room for the       circle around totem poles. There’s also      time are you coming in tomorrow?”
 A trip to the dark side            first time. And it’s not the magnetic      (generally) a lot of giggling, and not a     Expectant, hopeful pause.
 The sun and the moon shine         procrastination power Concannon            lot of weight-lifting. These are the folks      “I was thinking 7:30.” Silence.
 In unison                          has on folks who probably should           who insist on working out in one long           Then, “I could do 7:30, definitely.”
                                    be doing productive things like            conga line of elliptical machines so            “Great, man. I’ll see you then.”
                                    curing cancer, composing standout          they can have conversations with each           “Yeah, have a great workout, man.”
 Lately                             concertos, or reading that pesky           other and have live-action discussions          Love love love!! No homo. I
 It’s not what it once was          chapter on Hegel for Civ.                  about the latest development in Rock         half-expected the aforementioned
 A home by the waters                  No, going to the gym is much more       of Love or whatever show happens             fellow to swoon and drop the free
 With young ambition                than a distraction-factor. It’s more       to be the prime-time opiate of the           weights he was holding. It’d be very
                                    than a personal fitness standard I hold    McVinney masses.                             Victorian. He didn’t. But you could
                                    myself to. It’s the closest I’m going to      Of course, skittish as field mice,        tell that this great weight (no pun
 We’ve been                         get (at least for a while) to going on     there are the skinny specimens of the        intended, I swear) was taken from
 With fusion for ages               a safari! And this makes every trip        freshman variety, who flit in between        his shoulders. Gone were the lonely
 I’m starting to hate this          to Concannon’s House O’ Gatorade/          machines like waifs and hope no one          days of squats and biceps curls solo.
 I’m getting too old

 You need
 To learn how to jump ship
 Get ready to find it
 A place you can all go

 Find your way out
 Find your way out, find your
 Place in the galaxy
 You should know that
 You should know that, realize
 Someday you’re gonna lose me.

 You feel
 The dirt getting colder
 The days getting shorter
 The nights too silent

 You see
 Yourself in the mirror
 Just look at your neighbor
 A desert island

 Find your way out
 Find your way out, find your
 Place in this galaxy
 You should know that                                                                                                                  PHOTO COURTESY RAMASAMY CHINDAMBARAM

 You should know that, you should   Sweat/BO totally, absolutely, and          will sit on them while they’re doing         He now has his fellow Stegosaurus
 Realize that you don’t need me.    without a doubt worth it. Allow me         leg presses. All of the above genre-         for company.
                                    to explain.                                examples are endearing in their own             It really is adorable watching
                                       There are many different types          way. Okay, so the athletes are mostly        Stegosauri interact. They don’t give
                                    of gym-regulars. Some of the iconic        intimidating, but there’s something          each other massages. They ‘work out’
                                    ones have the honor of getting             endearing     about      bone-crushing       the muscles in another Stegosaurus’s
                                    a Lindsay Wengloski exclusive              badasser (a technical term).                 shoulder through the delicate art of

        Lamp                        nickname. Some of these nicknames
                                    aren’t very flattering, so I won’t
                                    repeat them here. But rest assured,
                                    there are hierarchies in the world of
                                                                                  But my personal favorite ‘type’ of
                                                                               gym-goer is the Stegosaurus. You know,
                                                                               the guy who can’t wash his own hair in
                                                                               the shower because his muscles are so
                                                                                                                            touch. “Just helping loosen up that
                                                                                                                            anterior whatever for you, bro.” Call
                                                                                                                            it what you want, I think it’s sweet.
                                                                                                                            It kind of reminds me of monkeys
        by Noregreb Ekalb           gym-regulars. There are standouts.         big? Yeah, him. Much like the Tweener,       grooming each other. And speaking of
          Portfolio Staff           There are All-Stars. There are             the Stegosaurus is not a solo gym-goer.      sweet, I love Stegosauri conversations
                                    freak-show escapees. And more              Oh no. He has a buddy. A work-out            you occasionally catch bits of. Not
        Flashpoint match            than all the interesting individuals       buddy, to be more specific. And, from        only are Stegosauri dedicated to their
                                    you can happen upon between the            my keen observations, selecting a work-      man-bond, they’re willing to defend
        under eclipsing             tricep torture device and the line         out buddy has all the gravitas of being a    the honor of hapless maidens like
        spotlight                   of glorious, glorious ab machines,         duck and picking a mate for life.            Lady Gaga.
        blinking short              there are entire genres of gym-goers          You don’t get between a man                  “Dude, Kanye West totally ruined
        under blacklight            you can be ‘filed’ into. The ‘genres’ of   and his bench-press spotter.          It’s   'Poker Face.’”
        sun for                     gym regulars are, by far, my favorite.     a deeply spiritual connection. It’s             “I know, man. I love that song.”
                                       Naturally, there are the Athletes.      more than bromance.          It’s about         “He’s such a douche. ‛Poker Face’
        days running                They’re the ones who do things             the bonds that are built within the          was fine before he made this crap.”
        on holy                     to their body that make CIA                hallowed confines of Concannon.                 “Yeah, true that.        ‛Just Dance’
        oil                         interrogation specialists wince and        Strengthened with whey protein and           wasn’t half bad, either.”
        from burning                go,     “Mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!             Muscle Milk, tested by extra reps and           It’s true, ladies and gentlemen. Life
        wells not                   That’s gonna hurt in the morning.”         higher weights, the man-bond that            lessons learned:
                                    They go through their workouts             exists between two Stegosauri is a              (1) Concannon has many interesting
        unlike the heart.           with this bulletproof aura that            thing of beauty and majesty. It’s also       people-watching/safari opportunities.
                                    just screams, “Yeah, I know I’m            insanely funny to watch. A buddy                (2) Stegosauri pick workout
                                    awesome. I’m actually majoring             might poach a girlfriend. A buddy            buddies for life.
                                    in kickin’ butt. You might want to         might drink your beer or accidentally           (3) It’s possible to be a Stegosaurus
                                    vacate that machine before I have          break your computer. But a workout           and rock out to Lady Gaga without
                                    my pinky-finger lay the smackdown          buddy never, never, NEVER cuts               surrendering a man-card.
                                    on you.” They get real respect.            and runs. They’ve got your back 110
December 3, 2009                                                                     PORTFOLIO                                                                                 The Cowl 25


  Not Your Average Conspiracy Theory
                by J.P Walrus                    on Google. What Google claims to be a            But what began as a government                  because the rising sea levels inhibits
                Portfolio Staff                  walrus is nothing more than a fat, bald       stimulus package to put Obama to                   them from being able to swim down far
                                                 mammal with Dracula teeth. The thing          shame quickly turned into a double                 enough to eat. The lie is starving to death,
                   Fiction                       is an overweight seal AT BEST! Hell,          edged sword. Now we were out of the                and if we don’t work soon to expose the
                                                 that’s probably where they come from—         Depression, but people still wanted to             truth then the government will erase all
   Here’s my problem with conspiracy             the zoos are probably told to fatten up       see the walrus. They were mystified                evidence before we have any solid proof.
theories: they all relate to a select few        a bunch of seals, shave them naked, and       by the strange creature that seemed to                They’re already at it. Go on
things. Aliens, UFOs, government cover-          hit up iParty to complete the look. Just      appear overnight in the country, and               Wikipedia and type in walrus—you
ups, Dave Chappelle going crazy and              like that, you’ve got another species that    wanted to learn more about it. Even                can’t edit the page, it’s locked. Why?
running off to Africa—everyone’s got             people will pay money to go see.              the Beatles caught on and wrote a song             The government can’t risk someone
theories on this stuff. People are too afraid       Only there’s a problem with that:          about absolutely nothing but confusion             (read: me) logging on and bringing the
to challenge the everyday truth we just          where can you actually find a walrus? I       and senselessness. The title of that song?         truth to light for the internet masses to
accept because it seems normal. We believe       know what you’re thinking “just go to         "I am the Walrus," completed with their            read in between reruns of Planet Earth
scientists simply because they say it’s right.   Sea World smart guy.” Buddy, I checked        Magical Mystery Tour.                              and pornography. Type in walrus to
That’s why I ask the questions everyone is       all the Sea World locations, the New             The government, at this point, is               Youtube, and what do you get? You get
too afraid to ask. Do bears really like honey?   England Aquarium, the San Diego Zoo,          crapping themselves because they                   a video of a walrus dancing to Michael
What about the moon, does it really exist?       and Roger Williams Zoo and didn’t             proverbially screwed the walrus                    Jackson’s song Thriller. Type walrus
And if it does, is it made out of spare ribs     come up with anything. There’s only one       big time and needed a way out. For                 into Google images and what comes




                                                 “
(cheese is out because I think cheese needs      known location right now, ONE, that you       the longest time they were digging                 up? Pictures of walruses with funny
oxygen or something like that)? And for                                                                                                           hats, playing musical instruments,
                                                     THE PEOPLE WERE MYSTIFIED BY THE STRANGE


                                                                                                                                    ”
the love of God, what the hell is updawg?                                                                                                         and making hilarious situations and
   Most of the time, I’ll admit, scientists      CREATURES THAT SEEMED TO APPEAR OVERNIGHT                                                        comments that are captioned since
don’t lie. Bears do like honey, confirmed                                                                                                         pictures can’t, ya know, capture audio
by a documentary about a bear who went           can go see a walrus: New York City.           themselves in deeper and deeper,                   too. Now I ask you, truth seeker, what
to extreme lengths to get it (he hangs out           That’s right, the Big Apple is home       without an exit strategy. And then, like           other animal did we believe in when
with a tiger that has a surprisingly racist      to the Big Lie. “But why?” you might          an awesome aura on a summers day, a                we were younger before growing older
name, but I could’ve just heard wrong).          ask yourself in confusion. The answer is      ray of hope came to them.                          and wiser? An animal that could play an
The moon, as we know it, is real, and it’s       simple. During the Great Depression the          Al Gore.                                        instrument, that could do funny things,
made out of moldy cheese (I guess that’s         government was running out of ideas              The man who ran for president came              that could wear a hat, and that could
why cheese needs oxygen—go figure).              to pump money back into the economy.          up with a conspiracy theory of his own             dance? I rest my case.
Nobody really knows what updawg is               Little things helped here and there, but      that would bail the government out in
—every time I ask they just tell me it’s         nothing was as effective as they wanted       ways that only the executives of General
not much and quickly change the subject.         it to be. They came up with an idea—get       Motors could even relate to. Al Gore
However, there is one question I asked           people out to see animals. With people        said the polar icecaps were melting,
one day while listening to The Beatles for       already being conservative with their         causing the sea levels to rise. Scientists,
three hours straight that shocked me. It’s       hard earned ducats, and the places            bankrolled by the government, jumped
information that the government doesn’t          impacted the most being Wall Street in        on this almost immediately and said
want you to know, and you were too               New York, the government really needed        “AND THOSE FAT THINGS YOU ALL
stupid to challenge yourself.                    something big to get people to come out       LIKE ARE DYING!” before quickly
   Walruses do not exist.                        of their houses and spend money.              realizing that pandas, who are way cuter
   I know, it shocked the hell out of me             Without any money to spend going          and something I would like to cuddle
too. I didn’t want to believe it either,         to exotic places and bringing animals         with, are also fat and dying. So the guys
but the more I looked into it the more           back, they came up with the idea              in the lab coats and nerdy glasses with
obvious it became that what we know              of just getting a few animals fatter,         duct tape took two steps back and said
as a walrus is a government conspiracy           slapping some fake teeth on them, and         “nope, it’s the walrus’” and everyone
so large that it’s expanded beyond the           shaving them bald. And just like that—        took a deep breath in relief before asking
borders of the United States.                    PRESTO!—you have the walrus, which            what was up. As it turns out, science is
   The evidence is all around us! First          almost single-handedly pulled the             claiming that walruses can’t swim to the
of all, look at the pictures that show up        country out of the economic depression.       bottom of the ocean to get food anymore                                      GOOGLE IMAGES




         Providence Cycle 14: Run Away Home
            by Secret Serialist                     He met her there. “What’s up?” she            “Ray tastes like it always does. . . did,”         “But this is the real Providence,” Laura
              Portfolio Staff                    asked, passing him a drink.                   Carl said.                                         said, spooning jam onto her toast.
                                                    “Nothing. Absolutely nothing,” he             “Always will,” Ed added, staring at a              “Why?” Dick asked. There was silence.
                   Fiction
                                                 said flatly.                                  greasy piece of pizza that looked like it             “It’s the Providence we remember,”
                                                    “Same,” she replied. They sat at the       would fix a flat tire better than it would         Ed said quietly. He seemed to know he
    Dick sighed and leaned back. It was          bar, the bass thumping down from the          make a decent meal.                                was wrong.
cold and raining outside, but it looked          ceiling at odd angles. They didn’t say           The following morning, he asked                    “Just because we remember it doesn’t
a lot better than the macro homework             anything for a while.                         everyone to breakfast at his place. They           make it the one and only real Providence,”
that was taking up most of his desk.                People filtered in and out of the          weren’t normally early risers, but who             Kathy said, realizing.
    They had made it back, a week or so          club. There were fake IDs, real IDs, 21st     wouldn’t get up early when it meant                   They stared at each other.
ago. They had just kind of zapped onto           birthdays, and something that would           waking from dreams of sea monsters,                   “I’ll say it,” Carl said, putting his fork
lower quad in the middle of the night.           have been a sexual assault if a guy had       zombies, and steam powered computers?              down. “We don’t want to be here.”
Well, not the middle. It was about 5             done it to a girl instead of the other way    And Dick made really good omelets.                    Nobody said anything. Carl continued,
a.m., so they missed the drunks, but the         around. The two at the bar didn’t drink          “I’ve done some reading,” he said,              “This might be the Providence we all
ROTC kids sure got a shock. At least             too much, they just seemed to sit there. At   as he flipped the last few eggs onto               remember, but it’s not a very good one.”
they didn’t have real guns.                      about one in the morning the bartender        their plates. “Some scientists believe                “Nothing feels real,” Laura said. “It
    It had been strange, getting back            moved them along: he needed the bar           that alternate realities really do exist,          just seems dull.”
into classes. Dick had woken up every            space. They tipped him and walked out.        that they’re real worlds as legitimate as             Carl put his arm around her. She lay
morning after they’d gotten back and                Their breath frosted as they walked        our own. Others think that they come               her head on his shoulder.
been pretty happy to realize that                back to campus. “It’s like nothing’s real,”   and go, join and rejoin the main flow                 “So we want to go back?” Dick asked,
the scariest thing in his life was an            Kathy said.                                   of time as they pan out into nothing,              looking around.
impending quiz, and that was after                  Dick laughed. “Even though this is the     destroy themselves or become so similar               “I liked fighting zombies,” Carl said.
a shower and breakfast. They still all           real Providence.” It wasn’t a happy laugh.    that they just fold themselves back into              “Rum running was actually really
met for lunch in Ray, chilled in Carl’s             They all met for lunch the next day.       greater reality.”                                  fun,” Kathy said.
suite and Kathy and Laura’s dorm and                                                                                                                 “The      airship      technology      was
his place on Cheer Street. Nothing                                                                                                                fascinating,” followed Ed.
had changed.                                                                                                                                         Dick nodded, “Then we’re agreed?” He
    The morning after they had gotten                                                                                                             crossed his fingers under the table for luck.
back, they’d all called their parents.                                                                                                            Please, oh please let them not think he was
There had apparently been no lapse in                                                                                                             crazy, please God let it be possible. . .
their time spent at PC: they couldn’t                                                                                                                There were nods around the table.
decide whether that meant that the time                                                                                                           Dick tried to sigh silently.
they’d spent in the other dimensions                                                                                                                 “You’ve forgotten one thing, genius,”
had lasted no longer than a few seconds,                                                                                                          Kathy said. Dick thought he saw tears
or if they had all had doppelgangers in                                                                                                           in her eyes. He couldn’t tell if they were
their places while they’d been away.                                                                                                              hopeful tears, or simply the distilled
Neither was comforting, really.                                                                                                                   essence of rage leaking from her eyes. He
    Dick shook his head, kicked the leg of                                                                                                        hoped it was the former.
his desk and got up, grabbing his coat as                                                                                                            “If we’ve decided that the Providence
he walked out. He called Kathy, asked her                                                                                                         College of 2009 isn’t good enough, how
if she wanted to go out. Apparently she                                                                                                           do we get back to a Providence and a
was already at the club down the street.                                                                           PHOTO COURTESY SHIRLEY BOOTH   world that is?”
26 The Cowl                                                                    PORTFOLIO                                                                         December 3, 2009


                 Waiting to See for One Last Time
         by Susannah Simon                   bit the bottom of her lip in a rather       revealing a face streaked with tears               Her glowing face fell into dismay, a
            Portfolio Staff                  fretful manner.                             and lines of frustration.                          once green leaf which the icy fingers
                                                 “Why…” Before he had time to               “Joey. He was right next to                     of winter had strangled to the ground.
                  Fiction                    finish, Lila had taken the few steps        you.” A stone seemed to sink into                  Mark leaned in close to her and gently
                                             over to where he stood on the log and       the pit of Mark’s stomach and rest                 pressed his lips to hers. They were ice
    “What are you doing here?” Mark          lifted her small hands to his chest.        there like one stuck on the side of                cold, yet sweet as cherries.
stood on the broken tree trunk, his          Mark looked into her eyes and for a         the stream. He knelt down next to                     “I know you can’t stay,” said Lila,
hands resting gently in his pockets.         second thought she was going to kiss        Lila and gently touched the loose                  looking back out into the woods.
He swayed back and forth, testing his        him. However, her hands clenched            strands of her hair. The sunlight                  Mark remained looking at her, a
balance. He looked down at his jeans:        into fists and her face distorted into a    reflected off of her porcelain skin                sense of confusion welling up in
they were ripped at the knees and            fit of anger as she pushed him off.         and he had to almost shield his                    him. He tried to think back to earlier
caked with a combination of dry mud                                                                                                         that day; tried to remember if he
and blood. His mom was going to kill                                                                                                        had said anything to Lila. Only, he
him.                                                                                                                                        couldn’t remember anything. His
    “Nothing,” said Mark, still looking                                                                                                     mind was like a night sky with no
down. He didn’t want to be around                                                                                                           stars, just complete blackness.
her. Ever since the beginning of the                                                                                                           “I’m sorry I pushed you, by the
summer, Lila had seemed different                                                                                                           way,” she said, a hint of a smile in
to him. She used to be the annoying                                                                                                         her voice.
girl who his mom would make him                                                                                                                “It’s fine, just a little scratch,” said
invite to all his birthday parties; who                                                                                                     Mark as he pulled his sleeve back to
he was forced to walk with to school                                                                                                        examine his arm. However, the cut
everyday. Everything changed when                                                                                                           which had been there only moments
he turned eleven and those blond curls                                                                                                      before was gone, replaced by a patch
and emerald eyes made his heart beat                                                                                                        of perfectly smooth skin.
quicken and his stomach do flips.                                                                                                              “I should go. My mom’s going to
    “You should leave.” Mark glanced                                                                                                        be looking for me.” Lila gently kissed
up and watched as her mouth moved                                                                                                           his cheek and left. Her small silhouette
gracefully up and down; the pink of her                                                                                                     glided eerily between the tall trees and
lips spreading along her face, deterred                                                                                                     out into the open night.
only by a streak of dirt across her cheek.                                                           PHOTO COURTESY BJARNE HENNINH KVAADE
                                                                                                                                               Mark remained in the woods. His
It took him a moment to comprehend              “You’re so stupid! Now he’s gone,”       eyes from the striking glow. Joey                  legs were glued to ground. It was
her words and once he did, he was left       she yelled as he lay in pile of wet         was Lila’s dog, who was hit by a                   late, yet he wasn’t cold or tired. The
with a feeling of embarrassment and          leaves and dirt. He could feel warm         car and killed two weeks ago. Mark                 wind whipped through the tops of
disappointment.                              blood trickle down his arm and tears        cleared his thought, pondering                     the trees and shook a fit of laughter
    “I was here first,” he said in a         beginning to form in his eyes. Lila         how he would tell her.                             from the branches. It didn’t move a
tone which mimicked his irritated            ran down to the stream and squatted            “I miss you,” Lila whispered. Mark              strand of hair from his head or rustle
manner. They stood in the middle of          along its bank, hugging her knees and       glanced at her and watched as she                  his clothes in any way.
the woods. Dead leaves and broken            burrowing her head within her body.         gazed ahead of her, at the seemingly                  The whirl of the wind was suddenly
branches covered the earth like a            Mark silently got up and brushed the        never-ending expense of woods.                     interrupted by the sound of a dog
blanket. A stream flowed carelessly          dirt off his clothes. He put his mouth to   He followed her stare and noticed                  barking. Mark looked behind him to see
behind them, creating a soothing             the cut on his arm and sucked the dirty     how mesmerizing the trees actually                 Joey, Lila’s dog, sitting behind him; his
melody which caused his eyelids to           blood away, wiping the rest on his          were. Close up they were spread out.               golden hair undisturbed by the wind.
flutter. The piercing sound of a bird        jeans. He made his way down to where        Farther back they seemed to mold into              He got up and began to run deeper into
calling to its mate brought Mark back        Lila remained, like a statue carved in      one gigantic wall; preventing even                 the woods, beckoning Mark to follow
to reality; back to Lila.                    wretched perfection.                        memories from escaping.                            him. However, he wasn’t ready to go
    “I’m not kidding, Mark, you                 “Who were you talking about?” he            “I’m right here,” said Mark. Lila               yet. He wanted to see Lila again. So he
need to go,” she said quickly. Her           asked cautiously.                           looked up at him with a smile that                 remained by the banks of the stream,
eyebrows furrowed slightly as she               Lila slowly lifted her head up,          soon began to fade like the daylight.              waiting for her one last time.




                 Dear Taylor,
                                                                                                            Tiffany
                                                                                                       Making PC an emotionally stable
                                                                                                         place, one letter at a time
                                                                                                                                                    &Earl
                                                                                                                                         Suggestions: Trixi, Kati,
                   Names      are    tricky                                                                                           Brandi, or maybe even
                things to pick. Sometimes                                                                                             Mindi. Some people would
                parents take innovative                                                                                               see these as ditzy, I guess,
                spellings and silent letters
                a little bit too far. The
                                                              This Week:                                                              but as they are all in my list
                                                                                                                                      of recent rendezvous, then
                same goes for gender                                                                                                  I might be a little biased. We
                ambiguity. Jaime: fine;                     Something's in a Name                                                     can just say that if you go
Noah: distinctly masculine.                                                                                                           with anything that ends in
   As far as your situation goes, I don’t                                                                                             an “i” then you’re fine. With these names you
really know that Taylor is such an                                                                                                    will definitely be seen as feminine.
ambiguous name that you need to go                                                                                                       But hey, if you want to be respected
to the extreme of legally changing your                                                                                               for the rest of your life, and don’t feel like
name. If you are set on it though, you’re                                                                                             spending your nights straddling a pink
going to want to choose well and wisely.                                                                                              chrome pole, then you have other options.
The worst thing that you could do is be                                   Dear Tiffany and Earl,                                         My favorite choice, of course, is embracing
a person who changes her name to the                                                                                                  your unfortunately given name. Cut your hair
point of absurdity. Make the change                  I’m one of those people born to forward-thinking parents                         short like your lovable third-grade teacher,
quick, make it clean, and avoid any                                                                                                   start wearing baggy jeans, and maybe even
lingering confusion as to what you ought               who like gender ambiguous names. I’ve gone through                             big hoodies. And if you feel like showing some
to be called.                                          life with teachers, employers, and random people who                           skin, just go out for your rugby team; this way
   Beyond that, your possibilities are                see my name in print assuming that I’m a guy. I used to                         you can wear those little shorts and even show
extremely varied. Since you’re reaching              get outraged when this happened and get on my feminist                           off those bulging biceps and broad shoulders.
your mature twenties, you might consider             soapbox, but now I’m just sick of it. So I’m thinking about                         I know this might seem like a step back, since
a sophisticated name like Carolyn. There                                                                                              you want to be more feminine, but this might be
are also cute ones like Amber. Try to                  changing my name. I want something feminine but not                            more fun. You could even get your coach to fall
avoid flower names: They’re feminine,                     ditzy, strong but not masculine. Any suggestions?                           for you and your cute man voice. Then you can
but really obnoxious. Also shy away from                                                                                              show him off all around school as if you weren't
very common names. It’d be awful to go                                            —Taylor                                             doing something terribly tramp-like.
from being confused with a guy to being                                                                                                  I don't know, these are just suggestions,
confused with the rest of the world.                                                                                                  so you can always just get over it and realize
   And above all, if you have children to                                                                                             there are many amazing girls out there with
name someday, don’t do to them what                                                                                                   man names. Like that girl who likes Kanye, or
your parents did to you.                                                                                                              even that man looking one with rubber lips.
                      Sports
    Greedy Steals Win From Northeastern
                                                                                                                                                                                           Page 32
                                                                                                                                                                            December 3, 2009




     J a m i n e “ G r e e d y ” Pe t e r s o n ’s L a t e B u c k e t P r o p e l s F r i a r s t o R o a d W i n
                                                                                                                                                         McKenzie set a back screen on
         by Dan Ollquist ’10                                                                                                                          Peterson’s defender and Greedy curled
            Sports Editor                                                                                                                             to the basket where a lob pass from
                                                                                                                                                      Vincent Council ’13 was waiting for
           Men’s Basketball                                                                                                                           him. Peterson caught the pass and
                                                                                                                                                      finished on a tough shot as the shot-
                                                                                                                                                      clock expired to give Providence a
   If the early season has been any                                                                                                                   76-72 lead with 15 seconds left. A last
indication of how the Men’s Basketball                                                                                                                ditch effort by Northeastern was stolen
Team intends on playing down the                                                                                                                      by Curry, and the Friars escaped with
stretch of games, a lot of Friar fans                                                                                                                 the win.
will be developing ulcers over the                                                                                                                       “It was another close game and we
next several months. After struggling                                                                                                                 made some bad decisions down the
in the final seconds against both                                                                                                                     stretch,” said Curry. “Those are the
Northeastern and Boston College, it                                                                                                                   types of games you need to pull out.
is clear that this young team needs to                                                                                                                Those ugly ones on the road, you need
learn how to close out games.                                                                                                                         to be able to hang in there and come
   The Friars traveled up to Boston                                                                                                                   away with a win and that’s what we did.”
to take on the Northeastern Huskies                                                                                                                      For the game, Curry led the team in
on Tuesday, Dec. 1, and for the first                                                                                                                 scoring with 19 points on 7-10 shooting
35 minutes of play everything was                                                                                                                     from the field. He also went 3-3 from
relatively smooth sailing for the Friars.                                                                                                             beyond the three-point arc and seems
With the exception of a few careless                                                                                                                  to be finding his stroke after a rough
turnovers, the young Friars were                                                                                                                      couple of games to start the year.
composed and shot the ball with great                                                                                                                 Joining Curry in double figure scoring
efficiency from beyond the arc.                                                                                                                       was Peterson with 18, Bilal Dixon ’13
   The last five minutes were a                                                                                                                       with 11, Brooks with 10, and Council
completely different story. After a
                                                                                                       DAVID SILVERMAN/ DAVID SILVERMAN PHOTOGRAPHY
                                                                                                                                                      with 11. As a team, Providence shot
Jamine “Greedy” Peterson ’12 lay-           Jamine “Greedy” Peterson ’12 scored with 15 seconds remaining to give Providence a 76-72 win over         an impressive 56.4 percent from the
up put the Friars ahead 72-59 with          Northeastern on Tuesday, Dec. 1.                                                                          field, which included going 6-11 from
4:47 remaining, the wheels came off.                                                                                                                  downtown. They also outrebounded
The Huskies turned up the full court        keep the door open for Northeastern              ball however, Peterson was “Johnny                       Northeastern 30-27.
pressure and the Friars simply could        to steal the game late.                          on-the-spot” and got the missed shot                        Prior to facing Northeastern, the
not handle it. Veterans Sharaud Curry          The Huskies cut the Friars’ lead              and fired it off a Northeastern defender                 Friars hosted Boston College on
’10 and Brian McKenzie ’10 who have         down to two at 74-72 with just under             with just one second remaining on the                    Saturday, Nov. 28, and much like the
seen just about every type of defense       a minute remaining and, with their               shot-clock.                                              Northeastern game, PC played sloppy
imaginable in their four years of           fortunes hanging in the balance,                     Needing a quick bucket off of the                    down the stretch. BC entered the
playing in the Big East, inexplicably       PC turned to their go-to scorer                  inbounds play, Providence drew up a                      game without their best player Rakim
made a few careless turnovers which         Marshon Brooks ’11 to right the ship.            lob play for Peterson.                                   Sanders, yet the Eagles were able to
allowed Northeastern to claw back into      Northeastern, which keyed in on                      “We like that play a lot,” said Curry.               dictate play early on.
the game. After a Chaisson Allen layup      Brooks all night long, forced him to             “[Peterson] is so athletic that anytime                     “Boston College deserves a lot of
brought Northeastern within four at         take a tough runner on the right side            you can throw the ball up to him and                     credit for coming out physical and
74-70, both McKenzie and Peterson           of the hoop which didn’t even reach              let him go get it, it’s a great play for us.”
each missed the front end of a 1-1 to       the rim. On the other end of that air                And that’s exactly what Greedy did.                                            HOOPS / Page 28



Women       Friars Hang Tough Against No. 7 Wisconsin
Run Well at                                              by Al Daniel ’11
                                                           Sports Staff



NCAAs                                                    Women’s Hockey

                                                In Part I of last weekend’s two-night
          by Dan O’Brien ’10
              Sports Staff                  visit from the almighty Wisconsin
                                            Badgers, Alyse Ruff ’11 had stamped a
                                            virtual victory by inserting a shootout-
            Cross Country                   clinching goal after the game had already
   With the field set for the NCAAs,        been recorded as an official 2-2 tie.
the Men’s and Women’s Cross Country             Ruff nearly reran her heroics in
Teams traveled to Terre Haute, Ind., to     Saturday’s rematch with less than nine
compete against 310 collegiate runners.     minutes to spare and a 1-1 deadlock
The women’s team placed 11th overall        at hand in the third period. Hovering
behind the efforts of Hannah Davidson       unguarded in the neutral zone, she
’12, crowned 2009 All American with         lassoed a loose puck and bolted
her 37th place finish, and captain          down the Broadway lane in authentic
Breffini Twohig’s ’10 last cross country    shootout fashion.
race in the Friars’ black and white. On         But this time, her attempt to curl the
the men’s side of the action, the squad     biscuit home would be thwarted as the
was paced by Lee Carey ’12, Dominic         sprawling Wisconsin stopper Allanah
Channon ’12, and David McCarthy             McCready lashed out her left pad to                                                                                                 COURTESY OF SPORTS INFO

’11 as they placed 20th out of the          clog Ruff’s shooting lane and summon             Jean O’Neill ’11 scored the game’s first goal in a 2-2 tie against Wisconsin on Friday, Nov. 27. The
31 teams entered in last Monday’s           a whistle.                                       goal was O’Neill’s third tally of the season.
championship race.                              Not long thereafter, the long-
   Poised for a breakout race, the Lady     muzzled Badger offense erupted to                Friars have now faced nationally-                        said team captain Colleen Martin ’10,
Friars sank their spikes into Indiana       score three unanswered goals within              ranked competition on nine occasions                     who assisted on Laura Veharanta’s ’12
State University’s 6K course and ran        the final 2:59 of regulation, thus jolting       this season and, on the one hand, have                   second period goal Saturday.
their best race of the year.                the Friars with a bitter 4-1 upshot.             routinely kept pace with every adversary.                   “I think we had them, I think we
   “I knew it was coming; they                  “It’s tough. And I choose to look               On the other hand, they are 1-5-3                     played extremely well in the third
were getting better and better every        at the fact that we played great in the          against these certified heavyweights,                    period. They’re a good team, it was
single week and their workouts were         first half of the third period,” said PC         and last weekend they nearly had their                   back-to-back, battle-to-battle, we had
progressing beautifully,” said Head         Head Coach Bob Deraney. “We get the              first victory over a defending national                  some quality shots, and I believe even
Coach Ray Treacy.                           breakaway to score, and we don’t [score].        champion in program history.                             though they did outshoot us, we had
   Entering the race, the Lady Friars       It’s a different game if that happens.”             “This is the toughest loss this season,               some chances, and we just didn’t come
found     themselves      ranked    21st        Instead, near misses around the              especially because they’re such a high-                  out on top.”
                                            cage effectively amounted to a near              ranked team and [a win] definitely                          The Badgers more than outshot the
                            XC / Page 28    miss on the national landscape. The              would have helped us in the long run,”                                          FRIARS/ Page 29
December 3, 2009                                                                         SPORTS                                                                                    The Cowl 31


PC Tops Buffalo off of Marandola’s Scoring Spree
          by John Butler ’11
          Asst. Sports Editor                                                                                                                           to just 25.5 percent shooting from the
                                                                                                                                                        field, and that was critical to the win.
                                                                                                                                                           Offensively, four different friars
         Women’s Basketball                                                                                                                             (Hankins, Dorsey, Marandola, and
                                                                                                                                                        Jessica Clark ’10) were in double
   The Women’s Basketball Team                                                                                                                          figures, with Hankins and Dorsey
improved its record to 6-1 and soundly                                                                                                                  leading the charge with 18 and 17
defeated Buffalo, 86-63, on Tuesday,                                                                                                                    points, respectively. Dorsey was solid
Dec. 2 in the Friars’ second consecutive                                                                                                                from three-point range, knocking
victory by more than 20 points. The                                                                                                                     down three of her four attempts.
win came after a road trip to California                                                                                                                   There was a much different story
in which Providence went 1-1 in the                                                                                                                     for the Friars the previous day in
Warner Center Marriot Classic over the                                                                                                                  a frustrating loss at the hands of
weekend.                                                                                                                                                Pepperdine. It was a tale of two
   “It was really good for us to come                                                                                                                   halves for the girls from Smith Hill,
and get a win [against Buffalo], just                                                                                                                   in which they played right along
getting back from California, to come                                                                                                                   with their counterparts for the first 20
back home and really play like we did,”                                                                                                                 minutes,but could not follow suit in
said Friars Head Coach Phil Seymore.                                                                                                                    the latter 20 minutes.
   And although the final score                                                                                                                            The game’s beginning did not
indicates a happy ending, it seemed                                                                                                                     suggest that it would end the way it did.
that during the first half, the outcome                                                                                                                 Providence came out strong, and even
would be much closer than it turned                                                                                                                     ran out to a narrow 36-35 lead at halftime.
out to be.                                                                                                                                                 The offense had a difficult time
   The first half was a defensive duel                                                                                                                  finding its footing against the powerful
between the two squads, and neither                                                                                                                     Pepperdine squad. And although the
team was able to establish much of a                                                                                          COURTESY OF SPORTS INFO
                                                                                                                                                        defense did carry its weight through
rhythm. Providence did show some            Mi-Khida Hankins ’11 put up 21 points as part of the fireworks show in the Friars’ 86-63 victory over       the second half, some substantial
signs of life toward the end of the         Buffalo on Tuesday, Dec. 2.                                                                                 Providence foul trouble shifted the
half, thanks to a bank shot by Emily        over the first five minutes of the second           her and when she’s playing well it                      balance in favor of Pepperdine. Six Friars
Cournoyer ’10 with 2:38 remaining           to take a 46-35 lead. Even after Buffalo            really helps us.”                                       accumulated at least three fouls by the
and a jumper by Mi-Khida Hankins ’10        managed to put some points on the board,               Tuesday’s win came just two                          second half, and Pepperdine capitalized
on the Friars’ next position. Providence    Marandola was there to sustain and                  days after Providence wrapped up                        on the Friars’ weakness by shooting 58.3
ended the half with a 37-31 lead.           increase the Friars’ lead, which ballooned          tournament play on the West Coast                       percent from the free throw line for a
   “The first half we played lackluster,”   to 23 points by the game’s end. It was as           in impressive fashion by downing                        total of 21 points—a telling differential,
said Coach Seymore. “We needed to           if Marandola, the Friars’ floor general             Northern Colorado by a 26 point                         particularly in light of the 15 points that
rebound more and move the ball better.”     from Johnston, R.I., was putting on a               margin of victory, 73-47. Although the                  separated the final scores.
   Providence answered the coach’s          clinic down the stretch. With just under 10         offense sparked the win, the defense                       Spotty shooting down the stretch
rallying cry in the second, thanks          minutes remaining, she sandwiched a fast            was stellar throughout the game.                        for the Friars kept a win out of reach.
largely to the play of Hankins and          break lay-up with two three-pointers that           Providence held Northern Colorado                       Providence was able to muster only 15
Chelsea Marandola ’10. Marandola led        brought the house down, and brought                 to just seven points after nearly 15                    points in the second half. Hankins and
all scorers with a career-high 31 points    Buffalo’s spirits down as well.                     minutes had elapsed in the first half.                  Marandola each chipped in 10 points
and her play, along with Hankins’               “Chelsea is back 100 percent.                      The backcourt answered when                          in the effort, and Hankins matched
intensity was enough to jump start the      She shot very well tonight,” said                   called upon, also. Brittany Dorsey ’10                  Cournoyer for a team-high six rebounds.
Friars in the second half.                  Seymore. “She pushed the ball well,                 led all rebounders with eight grabs                        Providence returns to action in a
   Although Buffalo struck first,           she rebounded. She’s playing her best               and Hankins followed up with seven.                     matinee this Saturday against The
Providence responded with an 11-2 run       basketball right now…I’m happy for                  Providence held Northern Colorado                       University of Rhode Island.




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December 3, 2009                                                                           SPORTS                                                                                  The Cowl 30


                                                                                                 Friars Upset by Big Green
                                                                                                           by Chris Mammen ’11
                                                                                                                Sports Staff                         Big Green came roaring out, clanging
                                                                                                                                                     shots off the post twice in the first 30
                                                                                                                                                     seconds. Five minutes later, Dartmouth
                                                                                                                Men’s Hockey                         took a 1-0 lead when Scott Fleming slid
                                                                                                                                                     a one-timer past PC goalie Justin Gates
                        If you have any topics for debate, email PCI                                                                                 ’12. Chris Eppich ’10 nearly scored the
                               cowlsports@gmail.com                                                 This past Friday, Nov. 27, while most            equalizer at 8:23 when he skated in on
                                                                                                 of us were still recovering from our                a breakaway, but his shot was turned
How will Tiger Woods be affected by what happened over this past weekend?                        Thanksgiving feasts, the Providence                 away by Dartmouth goalie Jody
                                                                                                 College Men’s Hockey Team took the                  O’Neill.
    How was Tiger Woods admitted to                   It’s a shame that Tiger Woods can’t        ice in Hanover, N.H., where they fell                  Shortly after, the Friars did manage
the hospital from an accident caused             drive his Cadillac as well as he drives his     to Dartmouth College, 4-2. The game                 to even the score at 1-1, when Eppich
from backing out of a driveway?                  golf ball. Last Friday, Woods plowed his        was a close contest, but ultimately the             set up Kyle MacKinnon ’11 for his
That is the question on everyone’s               black Escalade into a fire hydrant and a        Friars were unable to break through the             fourth goal of the season. Dartmouth
mind. What happens next is anyone’s              tree near his Orlando mansion. But that’s       solid Big Green defense. PC dropped                 regained the lead when Fleming scored
guess. Tiger Woods is the most                   not all. Two days prior to the crash, The       to 7-5-1 overall, their Hockey East                 his second goal of the night to but
recognizable sports figure in the world,         National Enquirer alleged that Woods had        record remains 2-3-1, while Dartmouth               the Big Green ahead 2-1. Dartmouth
as his endorsement deals exceed $100             been having an affair with nightclub            improved to 2-6 overall. Despite having             continued the offensive onslaught and
million each year. He has become an              hostess Rachel Uchitel, and in recent           knocked off a number of nationally-                 by the 6:26 mark of the third period
ambassador of endorsements because               days, rumors claiming that Woods had            ranked opponents thus far this season,              had established a 4-1 lead when the
of his combination of success and his            committed adultery with other women             the Friars find themselves near the                 Friars began to rally.
clean image. Tiger might be fierce on            have surfaced as well. Although the             basement of the Hockey East standings.                 At 16:20 Eppich scored his third goal
the links, but off, he is a charitable guy       truth has still not come out, all the chaos        “The feel of this game was a bit                 of the season and cut the Dartmouth
who cares, above all, about his family.          and speculation surrounding Woods               different, and I think it threw us off              lead to 4-2. Eric Baier ’11 and Matt
This one incident will not change that           has already begun to take its toll. Since       balance a little,” said Head Coach                  Germain ’11 were both credited with
image. To our knowledge, he committed            the accident, Woods has been slapped            Tim Army. “Coming right out of                      assists on the goal. With less than two
no crime and all allegations of spousal          with a $164 fine for careless driving           Thanksgiving the feel was a bit different           minutes left, Tim Smith ’13 appeared
disputes have been denied thus far. All          and has pulled out of his annual charity        than our in-conference games and                    to have a chance on an open net when
this incident has done is proved that            golf tournament, the Chevron World              especially our recent games. We have                O’Neill made a spectacular sprawling
Tiger Woods is human.                            Challenge.                                      played a lot less Hockey East games than            save to preserve the lead.
    Tiger Woods is too important to his               Tiger Woods will be affected by
sponsors and the PGA to be pulled from           what happened in many ways, both on
advertisements. He is the single biggest         and off the golf course. Golf is a very
draw the PGA has to offer. The public            psychological game, and if you’re facing
comes out to see him, not knuckleheads           distractions, you will not play your best.
like Rory Sabbatini. The PGA and                 Woods has an unparalleled ability to
their affiliate sponsors will continue to        block out distractions and consistently
promote and run ads with Tiger because           perform at a high level, but it will
it would be too costly not to. Corporate         undoubtedly be a while before he is able
sponsors such as Nike and Gatorade will          to regain his focus on the game and regain
not drop Tiger, because their sales would        his edge over the competition. I won’t be
plummet without him. Plus, he did not            surprised if Woods struggles during the
do anything to warrant termination.              2010 season, but I expect him to contend
People will still view him as the greatest       in both the U.S. and British Opens
golfer to ever live and companies will           which will be held at two of his favorite
still view him as the perfect salesman.          venues—Pebble Beach and St. Andrews.
    Getting back on the course could be          Woods has won majors at both sites with
the best remedy for Tiger. Most athletes         record-setting performances.
see their field of play as a means to                 Similarly to Woods’s golf game, his
escape the pressures of the outside              reputation will also be damaged; even
world. Playing allows athletes to                if it is proven that he did not have affairs
focus on something else besides all the          with any of the suspected women. Tiger
questioning. Kobe Bryant used the court          Woods has revolutionized his sport                                                                                              COURTESY OF SPORTS INFO
to alleviate stress from his rape charges        like no other athlete in history, and
                                                                                                 Kyle MacKinnon ‘11 scored one of the Friars’ goals against Darmouth on Saturday, Nov. 27. The score
and Phil Mickelson used the course to            consequently he’s the highest paid and
                                                                                                 was MacKinnon’s fourth of the season.
momentarily forget about his wife’s and          arguably the most famous athlete in the
mother’s breast cancer diagnosis. Tiger          world. Every young golfer dreams of             the rest of the conference, so we aren’t               The Friars also pulled Gates with
will relish the opportunity to play the          becoming the next Tiger Woods, and              even thinking about those rankings yet.             a minute left and had several solid
game he loves without worrying about             adults are in awe of his talent and aura.       We are developing still, but if you had             chances with the extra man, but were
reporters burdening him with questions           He can hit 300 yard drives that disappear       told me 12 months ago this is where we              ultimately unable to convert. Gates
regarding the accident. In fact, Tiger           into the stratosphere, stop his wedges on       would be I would have been comfortable              recorded 29 saves and the Friars held
might go into a period of hiding where           a dime, and can flat out putt the lights        with it; there were games we could have             a 47-33 shot advantage.
he does nothing but practice to improve          out. His wife is a former Swedish model         played better, but we are playing some                 “Coming from Thanksgiving, we
his game. If that is the case, then watch        and he endorses too many products to            pretty good hockey.”                                wanted to stay with our game and
out 2010 PGA Tour field. Last year               keep track of. Not too shabby, right?              Ian O’Connor ’11 shared his coach’s              keep playing,” said MacKinnon. “We
Tiger went without a major and he will           Unfortunately, Woods’s nearly flawless          optimistic view. “After a season like               played well the whole game and had
undoubtedly be more motivated than               image will definitely be tarnished after        last year’s we knew we would have to                chances late but just couldn’t put them
ever to dominate the PGA tour. If there          what has happened in the past week and          earn some respect and we have played                away. We want to play the same style
is anyone that can overcome something            he will have to earn back the respect and       well,” said O’Connor. “I don’t think                of game in every situation, to have
like this it’s Tiger. He has always kept         reverence of his fans.                          you can underestimate any team in our               control and discipline.”
to himself off the golf course and has                Last, but certainly not least, this past   conference; we aren’t underestimating                  This weekend the Friars will travel
maintained his stoic, competitive                weekend’s events will take a toll on            anyone, and if they are underestimating             to Bangor, Maine, where they will
demeanor at all times. From here on out,         Woods’s family. His children are too            us it’s a mistake.”                                 square off in a weekend series against
I’m sure Tiger will keep any news that           young to understand what’s going on,               The first period was played to a                 the University of Maine.
comes out about the incident with his            but eventually they will grow up and            stalemate with the Friars holding a slight
wife very quiet and will focus on what           find out what has happened. As for his          15-13 shot advantage. As soon as the
he does best, playing golf. With most            relationship with his wife, let me just         puck dropped in the second period, the
other athletes I’d be skeptical of a quick       say that Woods is in deep rough and it
return to dominance after an incident            will take all he’s got to get back into the
like this, but with Tiger, I fully expect        fairway. Time and time again, Woods has
him to have an excellent year on the             proven his knack to pull off miraculous
PGA tour next year.                              recoveries when it seemed as if he was
                                                 down for the count. It will be interesting
                                                 to see if he can get up and down from this
                                                 horrid lie.

                     — Chris Crawford ’10                                — Nicholas Aiken ’12
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29 The Cowl                                                                                     SPORTS                                                                  December 3, 2009


The MLB Hot Stove:     Saints, Colts Set-Up for
Chapman Draws Interest Memorable Superbowl
                Plenty of Talent Available this Off-Season
                                                                                                                by Chris Torello ’11               both teams finished with a loss, or two,
       by Daniel McNamara ’13                    does now. Most of us believe that. To                              Sports Staff                   they are still arguably the best teams
             Sports Staff                        them, it’s only money.”                                                                           in the NFL. Another thing going for
                                                    Many baseball analysts believe that                             Commentary                     this possible Super Bowl matchup is
         Major League Baseball                                                                                                                     that the Colts and Saints will not meet
                                                 the Yankees will end up catching this
                                                 big fish because they are able to give                                                            unless it is in Miami in February. It
                                                                                                         ESPN NFL analyst and Hall of
   $208,097,414. This is more than a big         him a big-leaguer’s contract right off                                                            would be special either way, but for
                                                                                                      Fame Quarterback Steve Young said
number: it is the payroll of the 2009            the bat. Look for Chapman to get a                                                                two teams to go in unblemished would
                                                                                                      it best following the Saints’ 38-17
World Series Champion New York                   contract ranging anywhere for four to                                                             make it more memorable.
                                                                                                      Monday Night Football blowout
Yankees. The Bronx Bombers spent                 six years and around $25 million per                                                                 To have two teams at 18-0 would
                                                                                                      over the New England Patriots: “This
more money on three different players            year. In terms of raw ability, Chapman                                                            make for a historic night in Miami. It
                                                                                                      year it isn’t defense that will win the
last off-season than did the Athletics,          has been compared to former college                                                               would erase the let-down from two
                                                                                                      championship, it’s passing.” Drew
Padres, Marlins, and Pirates on their            pitcher Stephen Strasburg, the No.                                                                years ago when the then-undefeated
                                                                                                      Brees threw for 371 yards on 18-23
entire teams. Does this go to show that          1 overall pick by the Nationals last                                                              New England Patriots rode into
                                                                                                      passing and five touchdowns as he led
only the big money market teams will             June. He has also been mentioned                                                                  Dolphins Stadium on their white
                                                                                                      his team to the first 11-0 start in Saints
be able to win because of their ability          in the same sentence as another big                                                               stallions looking to beat the little Giants
                                                                                                      history. With their improvement to 11-
to buy free agents? No. The Tampa Bay            lefty, Randy Johnson. With so much                                                                of New York and fell short in the game,
                                                                                                      0, the Saints joined the Indianapolis
Rays ran the table in 2008 and became            potential, scouts are salivating over                                                             and on the offensive side of the ball,
                                                                                                      Colts as the only other undefeated
the American League Champions,                   what Chapman could develop into.                                                                  in a 17-14 shocker that ranks as the
                                                                                                      team in the NFL. Peyton Manning led
only to lose to the Phillies in the World           In my mind, the most valuable                                                                  greatest upset in Super Bowl history.
                                                                                                      a come-from-behind victory over the
Series.                                          player on the market this year is Roy                                                             My apologies to all Patriots fans—I’m
                                                                                                      Colts’ AFC South rival Houston Texans,
   This year’s class of free agents is           Halladay, who has requested to be                                                                 a fan of the Big Blue, and it was a night
                                                                                                      35-27 on 27-35 passing for 244 yards
certainly loaded with talent, especially         traded from the Blue Jays. Halladay                                                               I will never forget. If the Colts and
                                                                                                      and three touchdowns. Both Brees and
in terms of starting pitching. Veterans          has posted a career record of 148-76                                                              Saints stay on track, they will face off
                                                                                                      Manning have thrown for over 3000
and proven winners Andy Pettite                  with a lifetime 3.43 ERA. Recipient of                                                            in a meeting that can be matched by no
                                                                                                      yards passing, and have a combined
and John Lackey are without a doubt              the 2003 Cy Young Award, Halladay                                                                 previous Super Bowl and one that can
                                                                                                      total of 51 passing touchdowns versus
the most reliable pitchers available             has finished in the top five in voting                                                            be forgotten by no football fan.
                                                                                                      only 20 interceptions.
this off-season, but there is also a             four other years, even while playing for                One could argue that these two
pair of young Cuban defects, Aroldis             a sub-par team. Last season in Toronto               quarterbacks have been simply
Chapman and Noel Arguelles, who                  he went 17-10 with a 2.79 ERA with a                 perfect and could lead their teams to
have caught the attention of scouts              league-leading nine complete games.                  respective 16-0 finishes. If this were
and coaches throughout the majors.               Halladay has said that if he is not                  to happen, then the Colts and Saints
Chapman, a 21-year-old, flame-                   traded by the time 2010 spring training              would each be two playoff wins away
throwing left hander seems to have               starts, then teams will have to wait                 from meeting in Miami for Super
the most potential out of anyone in              until after the season to obtain him.                Bowl XLIV with identical 18-0 records.
this year’s free-agent class.                    Due to his durability and proven track               Imagine that: two quarterbacks, who
   “He is an extremely talented guy,”            record, I think it would be wise for any             will have combined for at least 8,000
says an anonymous baseball executive             team looking for starting pitching to                passing yards and over 70 touchdown
who has seen him pitch to ESPN.com               put together a package that could lure               passes in the regular season, with two
“My bet is that it’ll come down the the          Halladay away from the Jays.                         offenses that will rank among the top
Yankees and the Red Sox, like it always                                                               offenses in league history, meeting
                                                                                                      for a chance to go 19-0 as Super Bowl
                                                                                                      Champions.
                                                                                                         Now, let’s not get ahead of ourselves
                                                                                                      both teams still have five weeks to
                                                                                                      get to the perfect regular season. The
                                                                                                      Colts and Saints will take every team’s
                                                                                                      best shot for 60 minutes and hope to
                                                                                                      survive at the end of it. If either team
                                                                                                      were to slip up, the focus would shift
                                                                                                      to how they are vulnerable and how a
                                                                                                      team like the Vikings or the Chargers
                                                                                                      could beat them in the playoffs because
                                                                                                      both teams have some defensive ability
                                                                                                      and explosive offensive talent. Even if




                                                                                                      FRIARS: Wisconsin Takes
                                                                           COURTESY NYDAILYNEWS.COM

Aroldis Chapman is one of the most prized free agents on the market. The flame-throwing lefty has
                                                                                                      Care of Business
clocked in at 102 MPH on his fastball.                                                                continued from back page                         Over the latter 40 minutes, Wisconsin
                                                                                                                                                   still sculpted a substantial 24-10 edge
     Top Off-$ea$on Free Agent$                                                                       Friars. First, they closed out Friday’s
                                                                                                                                                   under the SOG heading. But finally,
                                                                                                                                                   on just their fifth registered stab of
                                                                                                      draw by charging up a 20-5 edge on           the evening, the Friars snuck out the
                                                                                                      the shot clock between the third period      equalizer courtesy of Veharanta at
                                                          2009 Stats                                  and overtime. Then, to commence              17:17 of the middle frame.
                                                                                                      Saturday’s twig-lock, they ran up a              Allotted a mere three shots in the
  Position Players                               H        BA        HR         RBI        SB          16-0 edge in the first period alone.         third, including Ruff’s heart-stopper,
  Matt Holliday LF                               182      .313      24         109        14             But for all that, they scraped out        PC relied mostly on Lacasse and her
  Jason Bay LF                                   142      .267      36         119        13          an infinitesimal 1-0 lead. Goaltender        cast-iron defensive brigade to retain
  Johnny Damon LF                                155      .282      24          82        12          Genevieve Lacasse ’12—who on Friday          the tie. At one point, Arianna Rigano
  Miguel Tejada SS                               199      .313      14          86         5          ascended to No. 5 on the program’s all-      ’10 allowed a slapper to bounce off
  Orlando Hudson 2B                              156      .283       9          62         8          time career saves list—would repel           her midsection and pluckily nudged it
  Felipe Lopez 2B                                187      .310       9          57         6          the other 15 shots she faced while her       over her blue line.
  Vladimir Guerrero DH                           113      .295      15          50         2          skating mates blocked another four               Moments later, the unflagging
  Hideki Matsui DH                               125      .274      28          90         0          attempts themselves and four more            Badgers regrouped, snuck in the go-
  Jermaine Dye RF                                126      .250      27          81         0          scampered wide.                              ahead strike, and punctured the Friars’
                                                                                                         “We knew that they would turn it up       spiritual tanks.
  Pitchers                                       W        L         ERA        SO         S           the heat, and I thought we weathered the           “We took their blows, we took
  Andy Pettite SP                                14       8         4.16       148        0           storm pretty well,” Deraney granted. “It     their blows, we took their blows, and
  John Lackey SP                                 11       8         3.83       139        0           doesn’t matter how long you’re in your       all of a sudden we got the [potential]
  Jarrod Washburn SP                              9       9         3.78       100        0           defensive end, it’s how many quality         knockout punch, and we didn’t get it,”
  Aroldis Chapman SP                            *11       4         4.03       130        0           shots they get. They can do whatever         said Deraney. “Rigano wrecks herself
  Noelle Arguelles SP                            N/A                                                  they want and possess it however long        to get the puck and out and you need
  Jose Valverde RP                                4       2         2.33        56      25            they want, but if they’re not getting        to do that to win against a team like
  Joel Pineiro SP                                15      12         3.49       105       0            quality shots, that doesn’t matter. I        that. It’s difficult in that way because
                                                                                                      thought we did a good job of keeping         you need everybody playing that hard
  *stats from 2008-09 Serie Nacional in Cuba                                                          them to the perimeter and Genevieve          all the time.”
                                                                                                      was immense, gave us a chance to win.”
28 The Cowl                                                                              SPORTS                                                                                    October 8, 2009

XC: Davidson Leads The Pack Sister Act: Emily Kranz Takes
continued from back page
                            the Ice at Schneider Arena
nationally, a ranking not indicative of
                                             Friars, they were struck with a foot
                                             injury to Hayden McLaren ’10, a late
                                             season illness from Lee Carey ’12, and
their potential. Davidson led the Friars     David McCarthy’s season long battle                               by Al Daniel ’11
through the 6K course, improving her         with the flu and calf cramping.                                     Sports Staff                        to recognize women’s hockey as a
finish by 99 places from last year’s race,       Despite the illness and injury, the                                                                 varsity sport in 2000. It was a time
and was the first Friar to cross the line    Friars ran an impressive race, beating                                                                  when east coast programs were still
for Coach Ray Treacy, who was not at         numerous ranked teams along the                                                                         the epitome of excellence for female
                                                                                                               Women’s Hockey                        pucksters.
all surprised to see Davidson garner         way, placing 20th overall. Days before
All American accolades for the first         Monday’s championship race, one of                                                                         Since then, a three-way championship
time in her career. “Hannah ran a very       PC’s lead harriers experienced flu-like                Less than one hour before last                   hegemony has developed between
smart race and used her experience           symptoms; sophomore standout Lee                    Friday’s opening face-off at Schneider              Minnesota-Duluth, Wisconsin, and
to build upon last year ’s result,”          Carey fell ill Thursday and was limited to          Arena, visiting Wisconsin forward                   Minnesota, who have won four, three,
said Treacy.                                 a light jog hours prior to Monday’s race.           Emily Kranz could be spotted in                     and two respective national titles since
   Finishing 21 seconds behind                   Carey ran extremely well, crossing              her warm-up attire sitting on the                   the inaugural tournament in 2001.
Davidson, Twohig was the second              the line as the first finisher for the              Friars’ bench.                                      And not long after the elder Kranz
Friar to cross the line, capping off her     Friars, and missing All American                       Although she insists she had no                  graduated and pursued a coaching
collegiate cross country career with         accolades by mere seconds. There                    particular motive for wandering to that             career in her home region, she and
her strongest showing at the NCAAs.          is no telling how a healthy Carey                   sect of the barn, Kranz happened to be              Emily united at Shattuck-St. Mary’s
Twohig’s leadership and experience           and McCarthy would have fared on                    roaming around a former hot spot of                 Prep in rural Minnesota—an institution
was essential to the Lady Friars’ 11th       Indiana State University’s course, but              her sister’s. Jennifer Kranz ’02 played             that has produced umpteen Friars,
place finish. Rounding out the scorers       Coach Treacy sees unlimited potential               defense in the PC women’s hockey                    including Jess Cohen ’13 and current
for the Lady Friars were Shelby Greany       for his lead runners as they return next            program for four seasons, appearing                 assistant coach Meredith Roth ’04.
’13, Mary Kate Champagne ’12, and            year as the anchor to the men’s squad.              in 104 cumulative games, scoring 12                    With Jennifer serving as an assistant
Emma Perron ’11, all of whom will                Also on the men’s side, Dominic                 goals and 10 assists, and partaking in              coach and Emily pitching in on a
return as the nucleus, along with            Channon ’12 showed glimpses of the                  an ECAC championship run in 2002.                   Cyclopean offense, Shattuck won
Davidson, for the 2010 squad.                future in what Coach Treacy called                     And last week, with her Badgers in               back-to-back USA Hockey National
   When the men’s squad lined up             “Dom’s best race of his career, in terms            town, the younger Kranz was granted                 Championships in 2005 and 2006.
next to their 250 competitors in Terre       of cross country.” With veterans Carey,             her first opportunity to skate in                   Emily’s last goal as a senior clinched
Haute, Ind. last Monday, they found          McCarthy, and Channon returning                     Jennifer’s old domain.                              the 2006 crown for her team at the
themselves in a very similar situation       for 2010, coach Treacy will again                      “It was really meaningful,” she said             expense of an Assabet Valley (Mass.)
as they had all year: depleted. Just         field another strong squad with                     after Friday’s match. “It’s great to see            squad featuring current PC defender
when things started to look up for the       unlimited potential.                                her campus, see where she spent her                 Leigh Riley ’11.
                                                                                                 four years.                                            In all, last weekend’s two-game
                                                                                                    “I was interested in coming                      series featured five SSM alumnae—
                                                                                                 [to school] out here, but I’m from                  Cohen and Roth for Providence and
  Men’s and Women’s Indoor Track Upcoming Schedule                                               Wisconsin, so that was my top choice.”              Kranz, forward Brianna Decker, and
                                                                                                    The Kranz family hails from                      goaltender Becca Ruegsegger for
Date             Event                   Location                         Time                   Waukesha, Wisc., the same town                      Wisconsin.
                                                                                                 that produced 2005 PC alumna Mara                      “It says great things about the
12/4/09          Fordham Invitational Bronx, N.Y.                         All Day
                                                                                                 Amrhein, and the eight-year age                     program,” Kranz said. “Shattuck’s
12/5/09          Brown Alden Invit.      Providence, R.I.                 All Day                difference between the two sisters has              amazing and brings great players to
1/23/10          URI Solien Invitational Kingston, R.I.                   All Day                made for several unique pages in their              its program. It just shows that we can
1/30/10          Terrier Classic         Boston, Mass.                    All Day                household hockey album.                             excel through high school, get to the
2/5/10           Giegengack Invitational New Haven, Conn.                 All Day                   Jennifer Kranz’s collegiate days                 college level, and play well there.”
                                                                                                 overlapped with the NCAA’s decision
2/6/10           Giegengack Invitational New Haven, Conn.                 All Day
2/13/10          Valentine Invitaional   Boston, Mass                     All Day




HOOPS: Friars Fall to Boston College in Final Minute
continued from back page

really taking it to us there in that first
half,” said Head Coach Keno Davis.
“They were very good in their half-
court sets, they’re very physical, and
they execute well.”
   The Friars had no answer for the
Eagles down-low at the outset of
the game. BC was seemingly able to
get into the lane at will and big men
George Southern and Joe Trapani gave
the Eagles countless second and third
opportunities with their offensive
rebounding. On the other side of the
ball, Providence couldn’t buy a bucket
in the first half. The Friars shot just
30.6 percent for the half and had a
countless number of shots that rimmed
in and out. Boston College pushed the
lead up to as many as 18 points until
Providence made a late run to cut the
lead to 11 at the half.
   Whatever Davis said at halftime
made Providence’s shooters wake up.
Curry, Brooks, Council, and Duke
Mondy ’13 all knocked down some key
three-pointers to bring the Friars back                                                                                                                        DAVID SILVERMAN/ DAVID SILVERMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

into the game. In a matter of minutes,       Bilal Dixon ’13 battled Boston College in the post all game long on Saturday, Nov. 28. Dixon pitched in with 10 points and nine rebounds in an 82-77 loss
the Eagles’ lead had evaporated              to the Eagles.
completely and the Friars claimed a
two point lead with under a minute of        pesky Eagles’ defense and the Friars                   One positive was the play of Council.               “For a team that got down 18 points
play remaining.                              were forced to foul BC to stop the clock.           The freshman guard has gotten the                   a lot of times, you’d pretty much expect
   The Friars got a much needed              The Eagles once again knocked down a                most play out of all of the newcomers               to see a team lay down and that would
defensive stop, but the Eagles once          pair of free-throws, and Curry missed               and has shown the ability to handle the             be it,” said Davis. “For us to be able to
again hit the offensive glass to give        a desperation three, allowing Boston                ball with confidence and knock down                 fight back and actually take the lead
themselves another possession. With          College to walk out of the Dunkin’                  big shots. For the game, he scored 12               in the second half, I think showed us
the extra chance, the Eagles found           Donuts Center with a hard-fought 82-                points and went 3-3 on three-pointers.              a lot. I think right now we see a lot of
their center, Josh Southern, in the          77 victory.                                            Joining Council in double figure                 positives and, with our young players
paint, where he connected on a layup            “Obviously I’m disappointed; I’m                 scoring was Curry with 20 points,                   going through this for the first time,
and was fouled. Southern calmly sank         disappointed after every game we                    Brooks with 16, Peterson with 15, and               they can learn from this and hopefully
the free-throw to put BC back ahead          lose,” said Davis. “But I think you                 Dixon with 10. Dixon and Peterson also              execute a little better down the stretch.”
by one. Needing a score, Curry tried to      could see a lot of positives coming out             did a solid job on the boards, hauling                 If the Friars want to compete in the
drive the lane but was stripped by the       of this game with our young team.”                  in nine and 11 rebounds respectively.               Big East, they better learn fast.
               Friars Scoreboard
December 3, 2009                                              SPORTS                                               The Cowl 27




Scores -- Standings -- Statistics -- Schedules -- Standouts
                                            Standouts


                      Jamine Peterson                                              Mi-Khida Hankins
                       Men’s Basketball                                              Women’s Basketball
                Junior — Stone Mountain, Ga.                                       Junior — Baltimore, Md.
  Peterson scored 18 points and recorded nine rebounds in a      Hankins scored a team-high 18 points in the Friars’ 73-47 win
          win over Northeastern on Tuesday, Dec. 1.              over Northern Colorado on Saturday, Nov. 28. Hankins also
                                                                          added seven rebounds and three assists.



                       Scores                                                     Schedules
 Friday, 11/27                                                   Friday, 12/4
 Women’s Basketball vs. Pepperdine          L, 64-51             Men’s Swim & Dive at Anderson Invit.       5:00 p.m.
 Women’s Hockey vs. Wisconsin               T, 2-2 (OT)          Women’s Swim & Dive at Anderson Invit.     5:00 p.m.
 Men’s Hockey at Dartmouth                  L, 4-2               Men’s Hockey at Maine                      7:00 p.m.

 Saturday, 11/28                                                 Saturday, 12/5
 Men’s Basketball vs. Boston College        L, 82-77             Men’s Basketball at Rhode Island           1:00 p.m.
 Women’s Basketball vs. Northern Colorado   W, 73-47             Women’s Basketball at Rhode Island         4:00 p.m.
 Women’s Hockey vs. Wisconsin               L, 4-1               Men’s Swim & Dive at Anderson Invit.       10:00 a.m.
                                                                 Women’s Swim & Dive at Anderson Invit.     10:00 a.m.
 Tuesday, 12/1                                                   Women’s Hockey at New Hampshire            2:00 p.m.
 Men’s Basketball at Northeastern           W, 76-72             Men’s Hockey at Maine                      7:00 p.m.

 Wednesday, 12/2                                                 Monday, 12/7
 Women’s Basketball vs. Buffalo             W, 86-63             Men’s Basketball vs. Brown                 7:00 p.m.

                                                                 Tuesday, 12/8
                                                                 Women’s Basketball at Hofstra              7:00 p.m.




                                                  Standings
                      Men’s Hockey East                                             Women’s Hockey East

                    Conference                Overall                                 Conference             Overall
 Team              W    L      T            W   L         T        Team              W    L     T         W    L     T
 New Hampshire 5        2      2            5   6         3        Northeastern      6    2     2         10   3     2
 Massachusetts     5    2      0            9   3         0        Boston College    3    3     3         4    6     6
 Boston College 4       3      2            6   3         2        Boston University 4    3     2         7    5     6
 UMass Lowell      4    3      1            8   4         1        New Hampshire 5        0     1         10   1     4
 Maine             4    4      1            6   7         1        Providence        3    3     3         4    7     6
 Vermont           4    4      1            6   5         1        Maine             1    5     3         3    9     5
 Northeastern      3    5      1            5   6         1        Connecticut       1    3     3         7    5     3
 Merrimack         3    4      0            6   6         0        Vermont           1    5     1         5    8     1
 Providence        2    3      1            7   5         1
 Boston University 2    6      1            4   7         2

				
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