THE ART OF LOSING AT THE GAME OF CHESS Numerous books and articles have been written concerning the art of winning at the game of chess. Their singular lack of success in accomplishing this purpose, and the author’s own observations and experience lead to the simple revelation that a fresh approach is needed to the game of chess, and a new skill developed more in keeping with a chess player’s natural inclinations. The art of playing Losing Chess answers this need, not haphazardly and without a plan, but firmly, and with a clear eye. Imagination is required, for it is not enough to have an ordinary loss. One must rise above this common occurrence through the application of proper technique developed through arduous study and precise practice. Helping us along will be our natural instinct for this brand of chess. A little hard work through the application of the principles outlined here and you will soon be a Master at Losing Chess. Most of us already qualify as top-rated Experts. Chess players of the winning school are at best stingy, surly and mean. When you develop the art of Losing Chess, your sweet, generous considerate personality – the Real You—will flower. Since losing chess games involves what up to now has been crudely termed as blunders, what follows is a sample of all sorts of them—some of which will lose more quickly than others. A little practice will enable you to tell you which are the most effective for you. Above all, you must look for the ones that compound themselves. Come along with me and learn! The Opening Although most games are lost in the opening moves, occasionally a real gain can be brought off there. Of course, like short stories, their simplicity can be deceptive. To lose a game that quickly is difficult and exacting. It is possible, though, and something you can master. It is best accomplished in an opening you know that your opponent plays often, and one with which you are totally unfamiliar. (See my game with P. Coe, given below.) Tips to remember in the opening: Always block your own pieces. Create lasting weaknesses such as ‘holes’ after pawn pushes. Do not castle. Eventually your opponent, even those with the dimmest of mental capacity will get the idea. The Middle Game Here is where most chess players lose their games. Usually the positions are quite complex and great care must be taken. Be careful, lest your inattention does the opposite, and you accidentally win. This must be avoided at all costs. Look before you lose.
The Endgame In the endgame, the mettle of the Master Loser is tested to the extreme. The most elegant result is attained if you can smoothly convert an absolutely won game into a loss. Positions are usually simple looking, but must be calculated carefully. Again, you are looking for the most direct way to a disastrous loss. Difficult? Of course it is—but I have faith in you. You’ve done it before. Time Trouble Getting yourself in time trouble will interfere with getting a truly beautiful loss, but it is one way of losing. The technique here is to act as if it didn’t really happen. First you must prepare for the loss. Get up frequently during the game and chat with the tournament director or another r chess player. Maybe you can cause him to get into time trouble also, a rather efficient way of promoting losing chess. Return occasionally to where your opponent is waiting and your clock is running. Sneer at whatever ineffectual move he may have made and go back to see how other people are losing. You will not only pick up ideas this way, you will discomfit your opponent. A few minutes before your time clock’s flag is to fall, sit down and ponder deeply over your next move. It is much more dramatic if the flag falls as you are making the move. Act as if nothing has happened. When your opponent points out that you have lost, act shocked and surprised. In the conflict that ensues, claim that you thought the time control was 30 moves in 2 hours. (This will imply that you are used to playing in much stronger fields.) When you finally accept your defeat, your opponent will not be happy with the win, giving you double satisfaction. Forks To be forked is the expressed essence of chess, the losing chess player’s most blissful experience during the game. One must be very careful not to get too many pieces exposed to be forked, lest your opponent become confused, not knowing which piece to fork. Your opponent may even become suspicious (a characteristic trait of winning chess players) and not fork you at all! Set up your pieces so that the fork will occur naturally (with a check of your King is best) in series, i.e., one fork after the other. He or she will not be able to resist this, thinking they are playing like a Master. Of course it will be you that are controlling the game. Little will your opponent suspect that soon the game will be over, and will be left with a totally won game. Getting Yourself Mated Quickly To do this artfully is not as easy as it sounds. The Master Loser must attain an aesthetically satisfying loss. It must not be so vulgarly obvious as 1 .P-KB-3, P-K4; 2. PKN4, Q-R5 Mate. To be simultaneously subtle, devious, and tricky is the key tactic here. What follows is from the author’s own experience in a team match with the Orlando Chess Club. My opponent was a young lad quite gifted in the Old School of
Winning Chess, but blissfully unaware of the Chess of The Future: Losing Artfully. Little did he know what was in store for him! Orlando, Florida 1962 Caro-Kann Defense MOVE 1. 2. 3. 4. White PK4 PQ4 PK5 PKR4 (My fearful opponent obviously thinks he is
playing a Master) What a wuss.
Black PQB3 PQ4 BB4 PB3!! (With unerring accuracy,
Black finds the weakest move on the board, thus throwing White into a state of shocked confusion)
5.
PKN4?? (Getting more space and opening up lines
for his pieces. We’ll have to overlook this, since White is playing by the old rules.)
BN3 !! (This may look
cowardly, but actually is the second move in a brilliant losing combination.)
6. 7. 8. 9.
PK6 (How utterly obvious) BQ3 (Right on schedule) QXB (The trap snaps) QN6 Checkmate
PKR4 (Setting the trap) BXB PXP!!! (White now has a
hopelessly won game, his next moved is inevitable and forced)
The spectators did not shower the board with gold coins, but one must not expect the crowd to appreciate and accept a new art form too quickly. Indeed, in the years since, I have experienced a singular lack of recognition for the generation of a loss, so often done carelessly in practice, and on occasion, it seems, deliberately. The world definitely does not love a loser. Too bad, there are so many. In conclusion, it should be pointed out that in each of our chessboard experiences, be it at home, in your club, or at a tournament we can find numerous examples that illustrate the theories and tactics outlined in this little treatise. Too be sure, all our games are not perfect, since in some cases the goal is not reached, and we stumble clumsily into a won game. But who knows? With persistent practice and determination, you might provide Caissa with the Immortal Loss.