Anger Management

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This document provides an analysis of anger, what it is and what causes it, and describes why controlling anger is important. After analyzing the different components of anger, the document then provides methods and strategies for controlling anger. This document is useful to organizations who are seeking documentation and information to be used in human resource training related to anger management, or to individual seeking to understand and control their anger.

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									This document provides an analysis of anger, what it is and what causes it, and
describes why controlling anger is important. After analyzing the different components
of anger, the document then provides methods and strategies for controlling anger.
This document is useful to organizations who are seeking documentation and
information to be used in human resource training related to anger management, or to
individual seeking to understand and control their anger.
Anger Management
Table of Contents


Different Components of Anger ..................................................................................................... 4
   Psychological Component ........................................................................................................... 4
   Physiological Component............................................................................................................ 4
   Cognitive Component ................................................................................................................. 5
Is Anger a Healthy Emotion?........................................................................................................... 5
Expressing of Anger ........................................................................................................................ 5
The Perspective of Modern Society about Anger ........................................................................... 6
How to Deal With Anger ................................................................................................................. 7
Anger Management ........................................................................................................................ 8
Why the Controlling of Anger is Imperative ................................................................................... 9
Strategies to Keep Anger at Bay ................................................................................................... 10
Relaxation ..................................................................................................................................... 10
Cognitive Restructuring ................................................................................................................ 11
Problem Solving ............................................................................................................................ 12
Better Communication.................................................................................................................. 12
Using Humor ................................................................................................................................. 13
Changing Your Environment ......................................................................................................... 13
Steps That Uses For Managing the Anger ..................................................................................... 13
References .................................................................................................................................... 15




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Anger and Its Perspectives

Dr. Charles Spielberg defines the word Anger as, “The state of emotion
that changes the intensity of brain from gentle imitation to intense rage &
fury.”

Anger is a usual emotion of any person like the other behaviors and
emotions; it’s a feeling of annoyance or aggression but it’s not a
permanent emotion, it’s a kind of feeling that’s temporary and maybe it’s a reaction of
something unbearable.

The feeling of anger is totally usual, normal and healthy behavior of any human being. Although
as it is on extreme, then it created or become the problem for others then this normal healthy
positive behavior turns into negative and destructive emotion. It causes the problem in home,
or in personal relationship, or at work or say at overall life. It can feel the person that he is a
slave of strong, powerful & unpredictable emotion.

According to the report of American Survey,
“1 out of 5 Americans has the problem of anger management”.

Anger is itself not a problem, the problem arises when we do not manage our anger.
Mismanagement of anger is primary reason of clashes in our professional & personal relations.



Different Components of Anger

An ager has many components or reasons, but following are three main components of anger.
        Psychological Component The emotional factor of anger, a reaction of anything
         depends what you feel, like disappointment, depression, frustration, or because of
         misery or sadness feelings.
        Physiological Component its physical state or reaction of body after or during the
         anger, it might be raise your blood pressure, or increase your heart beat, or cause a
         muscle tension.



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        Cognitive Component its state of feeling just after the anger, it might be possible you
         realizing that it’s alright to be annoying or frustrated, or maybe you think that no one
         understands you in this world or your partner always do the opposite, whatever you say
         or ask.

The feeling of anger is basically a warning bell, which informs you that it’s not the same thing
which you want it, typical reaction in order to perceived intimidation.


Is Anger a Healthy Emotion?

Anger is a normal, healthy behavior, but it very much depends on way of expressing either it’s in
a destructive way or in constructive. It’s an arousal of body due to the inner acuity of
unaccomplished needs.

An unexpressed anger is as much dangerous as expressing of anger in destructive way such as
loud n rude voices and intimidating gestures, or to spread it or express the anger emotions in
surroundings freely without care of others. It’s like to threaten the relationship either the
professional or personal (Robert, n.d).


Expressing of Anger

An Aggression is natural and common way of express the anger.
It’s a usual, adaptive reaction to any kinds of threats; Anger arouses or becomes the reason of
powerful, strong or often aggressive feelings & behaviors, which let us to struggle and defend
ourselves. The certain amount of anger is essential to our survival in this mean world.

We are not able to fight with every person or object, which irritates or make us annoy. The social
standards, laws, and the common sense place the limits ahead of us. To become angry is not a
negative or bad thing; the feel of angering can motivate the people to be more focused on their
concerns and it can also motivate the peoples to take action in order to change the enormous
societal issues. By using your anger in constructive way, you can handle your anger easily.




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Some people are not comfortable with anger. The experiences with anger especially in childhood
plays vital role in people’s lives. For example, if someone’s grew up in kind of family
environment, where everything is controlled through anger, then the any sign or feel of anger
make them worried, they not accept the anger as normal human behavior. These people are
scared of anger yet it’s expressed in proper way. They might be think that, “good or nice”
person’s never get angry.

Anger without reason or expressing of anger in an inappropriate way might be harmful for the
person itself. Whether you’re an introvert person or extrovert person, either you keep your anger
inside and not expressed it or you’re become harsh, aggressive outbursts or either you’re quietly
angry with your anger. It may become the reason of headaches, high blood pressure, sleep
difficulties, or digestive problems. And the worst is some evidences also proof that, the stress,
tension and aggression if it because of anger then they become the main reason of heart attack.


The Perspective of Modern Society about Anger
In today’s modern society, the emotion of anger considered as an uncivilized or immature
reaction of loss, threat, frustration, or violation. On the other hand, to keep calm, cool-headed or
turning the second cheek is measured as mature, decent and socially accepted behavior. This sort
of thinking can spread the negative words about anger like unrestrained violent outbursts, it
repressing the all feelings concerning the anger, or mislead the anger, while it’s likely a proper
reaction of situation. Even if the anger is always controlled, then it can cause the nightmares,
constant violent thoughts or actions, and even cause some physical symptoms. Also the Anger
might intensify the problem of mental health, which is already present but not active previously,
like clinical depression.

Many Physiatrists or even the common people agree on the fact that the depression is caused due
to anger that remain inwards of person. It’s because, many persons respond to stress because of
their inward anger, that’s a reaction to mental or physical mistreatment or may be neglecting
from parents or others. Another outcome of depression sufferer's & refutation of anger is that
maybe their interpersonal relationships are miserable and unhealthy.




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How to Deal With Anger


People use the different methods to deal with their anger emotion or feelings, consciously or
unconsciously. There are three main ways in order
to deal with anger.
        Through Expressing,
        Through Suppressing, or
        Through Calming.

Expressing the anger in positive but not an
aggressive or destructive way is the best &
healthiest mean to express the emotion of anger.
For this purpose, you have to be very clear about
your needs and requirements, and how you attain them without making the other’s life miserable.
Being an assertive person is not means of being demanding or pushy, it means you respect others
and as well yourself (Techniques, n.d).

The feel of anger can be “bottled up” or “suppressed” then changed or redirect in positive
manner. It happens only when you are able to control your anger, do not think about it, and try to
focus on other things, rather positive. Your aim is should be to restrain or suppress the anger and
direct it other way, in something constructive. A risk is involved in this kind of response and that
is; if it is not permitted the outward expression than likely anger is turn inward. When anger
turned inward then it may cause high blood pressure, hypertension, or depression.

An unexpressed anger may cause some complex problems. It may cause the pathological
expressions of anger, like unreceptive and aggressive actions (take the indirectly revenge from
the people, without telling the reason, fairly tackle them face-to-face) or the behavior of a person
that looks continuously pessimistic and aggressive. Those Peoples, who are continuously putting
others-down, and do criticism on everything, and making pessimistic comments are don’t know
that how they express their anger constructively. And obviously they don’t like the successful
relationships.




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Lastly, you should calm down inside. It is not only the matter of controlling your anger and
internal responses, but through this you can maintain your heart rate, cooled down and able to
change the feelings of anger.


Anger Management
The primary aim of anger management is; decrease the level of those feelings that cause the
anger, and also the psychological arousal that being reason of anger. You are not able to throw
away all the things, or leave the persons, or ignore, that make you angry, neither you are able to
change them but you may control your emotions to learn to manage your anger and other
emotions (Anger, n.d).

A person who is not able to control his emotions, then he may need to look for professional help
in this regard, or to take a competent anger management class that helps him in controlling his
behavior.

Through joining the class of anger management, an angry person is able to learn, how to express
or deal with anger in a healthy, and controlled way. In these classes, People learn what exactly
the anger is, and how they become aware of their anger symptoms, and how they recognize their
own feelings related to anger, and how they are able to manage their anger or control their anger.
This technique is applied separately on everyone, with families, or spouses or in group of friends.

Therefore, peoples deals with different strategies, like for those persons who were served in
military, the trainer of anger management classes might work on him or help him on realizing the
fact that he don’t have any need to get aggressive on minor things, or yelling, or screaming on
that things, as he is angry. An anger management trainer works or also deals, on matters the
individual might have with his childhood, for example being in an offensive family.

Those persons who believe that he/she is not capable enough to manage his/her anger can apply
many of these tactics by themselves. However if the anger of any person is out of control, or has
escalated into aggression, or hurting the relationships either personal or professional, then a
person must take an advice from a psychotherapist or from an anger management professional. A




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role playing in controlled circumstances, likely the anger management classes can facilitate one
to follow their methods.

Nowadays, some psychological tests are present that determine the intensity or strength of anger,
how much you prone your anger, and in which way you handled it. However the probability is
excellent, if you really have a difficulty with anger and you know it already. If you behave
aggressively, or frightening or become out of control in anger then you must consult to
psychotherapist in order to find the better way to deal with anger.

According to PhD Dr. Jerry Deffen Bacher, a psychologist and did his specialization in anger
management, is that, some persons are extra "hotheaded" as in comparison of others, they easily
get angry and more aggressively than the average person. And there are also some persons, who
are not express their anger in noisy spectacular ways, but are constantly touchy and irritable. The
peoples who are easily got angered are not always throw the things or annoying; at times, they
leave their social life, or get physically ill, or sulk.

Those peoples, who are easily got angry, usually the psychologists call as, a little patience for
frustration; it means that, they sense that they shouldn’t have to be subjected to inconvenience,
annoyance, or frustration. They may not take the things simple, and they're mostly furious if the
situation seems uncontrollable.

The term of Anger management usually refers to a method of psychological therapeutic
practices and it use on someone who have extreme or unmanageable anger, it may manage or
decrease the degrees, triggers, and possessions of an angered emotional condition.

The methods for controlling anger are the result contract with other person rather than a clash. In
various countries, anger management courses are mandated, according to their legal system.


Why the Controlling of Anger is Imperative

You should control or learn to manage your anger before it gets out of control. From this you
are not only get the success in your personal life but also in the professional life. Anger causes
the strong and powerful feeling of hostility, rivalry, or unhappiness towards something or



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someone. It is an accepted behavior that receives on many types including physical, verbal, and
emotional outbursts. It may have and cause many tense effects on your life, but also on others
life, those who around you. Some possessions of anger include:

        Poor work performance
        Restless sleep
        Feeling negative and uneasy
        Chance of losing family & friends
        Marital and family problems
        Tendency to gossip
        Lack of energy
        The Lack of appetite, or over of an appetite
        Many health related problems like strokes, heart attacks, ulcers, weight gain or loss, and
         gastrointestinal disorders.



Strategies to Keep Anger at Bay

Relaxation

        Through deep breathing and relaxing, you are able to calm
         down your feelings of anger.
        By repeating the words like “Calm Down” or “Relax” or “Take it Easy”, you also control
         you anger, Repeat these words again and again with taking the deep breath.
        You can use your imagination or visualize a relaxing experience in order to control your
         anger.
        The exercises like Yoga, may relax your muscles tension and you feels better.

    Through practice of these methods on daily basis, you are able learn, how to use these tips
    and tricks while during anger or in tense situations.




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Cognitive Restructuring

        A Cognitive restructuring means you change the way of your thinking. Mostly Angry
         peoples lean to swear, curse or speak in the language that reflects their inner thoughts.
         When you become angry, your thoughts are exaggerated, pessimistic or overly
         dramatic. Replace these kinds of thoughts by neutral ones. For examples, Instead of
         saying, Oh, it’s terrible, or Ah, nothing is right in my life, it’s awful, or that ruined the
         everything in my life change these kinds of sentences use or tell to yourself that, Ya, I
         know, it’s frustrating but I can understand, or its true, I’m offend about it but it’s not the
         end of the world and through anger it can’t be fix up.


        Remind this sentence that; anger is not fix up anything again and again, it can’t make
         anything better or even it cannot make your mood better, actually it make you feel
         worse.

        Through Logic you are able to control or overcome your anger, The reason behind is;
         when anger is being justifying then it rapidly become unreasonable or no need of or
         unnecessary. Just try to remember it that, it’s nothing more than the hard spot or
         experience of life. Practice it every time whenever you feel the emotion of anger, and you
         are losing your senses, it will facilitate you to get a reasonable point of view.

        The Angry peoples are likely to insist on things like appreciation, agreement, fairness,
         eagerness to do the things according to their wants. During the anger everybody wants
         these kinds of things, and we are upset and frustrated when we don't getting it, the
         disappointments change into anger. Since the part of cognitive reformation, the angry
         peoples have to become conscious about their demanding personality and try to change
         their anticipations into needs. As you say, “I have a wish to” is much better than saying “I
         must have” or “I demand”. When you are not getting the things which you want, you will
         be disappointed, frustrated or may be hurt but not angry. Several people use their anger as
         a way to evade the hurt feelings, but that‘s not diminish the feelings of hurt.




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Problem Solving
Many times, our annoyance, aggression, and anger are because of genuine and unavoidable
problems of lives. All anger is not misplaced; basically it’s a normal, healthy reaction of
problems. The finest attitude for this kind of situation is, do not focus on or search out the
solution, it’s better to look the difficulty from front.

Make the road map and ensure your progress all along the way. Try to determine it by giving it
your best but do not punish yourself, when you don’t get your desired answer.

If you may face the problem with your finest efforts & objectives and take a serious try to face it
from front, then there will be very little chances that you’ll lose your patience and fall into all-or-
nothing thinking, yet as long as, the difficulty does not get resolved correctly.


Better Communication

The angry peoples more likely to fly to or try to work on
final results, and maybe possible that some of these results
are very inappropriate.

The things which you have to do, if you’re in mood of
anger:

        Slow Down yourself and try to think through your
         reactions.
               Do not say the things immediately when it
                  comes into your mind, try to slow down yourself and cautiously think about the
                  after effects of your sayings.

        Listen cautiously of what other person or peoples trying to say, think a min before giving
         the answer.

               Listen yourself; what’s the cause behind anger.



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               It’s a natural phenomena, to get defensive whenever you’re criticized but do not
                  fight back.
               Try to keep yourself as cooler as you
                  do, and don’t make the situation
                  terrible.


Using Humor
Through silly humor, you may resolve anger in a numerous methods. Just because of one thing,
you can get a more reasonable point of view. Whenever you get angry, try to give a name or
character to someone, and imagine him/her into that phase, how they look like in that character
or picture. You can always rely on humor to uncut or control the tense situations.

An angry person normally feels that they are right, and any change or blocking in their plans is
not acceptable in any case, and he/she should not suffers because of this.


Changing Your Environment

At times it's our instant environment that gives us reason for annoyance and rage. Some
problems and every day jobs may weigh on you and it makes you angry. You’re trapped it and
now you look all the things & people form that trap.

Take a break from the daily routine life; ensure that you have some time for yourself from the
schedule, especially when you are stressful.


Steps That Uses For Managing the Anger

    1. A first thing in order to managing the anger is the recognition of the incorrect attitudes
         or behaviors and the convictions that inclined us to being extremely angry. When we are
         able to correct these mistakes, then we’ll be able to ignore the past.

    2. Secondly, the recognition of those issues and reasons from childhood that stops us from
         expressing our anger as expressively as we do. May be possible, the ignorance, denial,


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         and fear factors were involved in it. The obstructions to the appropriate and effectual
         management of anger towards others should be eliminated, so that our repressed anger
         will not mix itself, within of us, while it has been liability of many years.

    3. Third step in order to manage our anger is; try to learn the accurate methods of showing
         our genuine anger at others, therefore we can start to manage it more efficiently with
         anger irritating situations, when they occur. Once we are anxious or unhappy in our
         relations, we are frequently experiencing the effects of our repressed anger. The difficulty
         is, our anger is so deeply suppressed that it’s hard to conceal it from our own selves.
         Whatever we do, is the after effects of our suppressed anger, it includes our depression,
         aggression or anxiety. Most of the times we are anger from our selves without knowing
         the reason.

    4. Fourth point in the process of anger management is bandaging the wounds that had been
         left through the potentially irresistible emotional impact of anger. "Anger wounds" left in
         us beside of those peoples, who have done something wrong with us. If we don’t finish
         this clean up step, we will stick to the bitterness of having been done wrong and will
         forever carry its after effects in our hearts.

Forgiving is the most effectual and successful method in order to give the instant reprieve to
ourselves especially in personal relationships.

Maybe it takes some time and strong attempts to put these instructions into practice, while you're
facing situations that naturally send you into the state of anger. It’s really hard to remember the
anger managing strategies at the time of aggression.

You must keep something with you that remind you to control your aggression at the moment of
heat, and you are easily step back from the situation. Such as, you may keep a small piece of
paper in your pocket or purse with your tips of controlling anger, or a small stone that reminds
you the tricks of anger controlling. From daily practice, these management methods come out
from you at the time of anger and you don’t need to take or place these remainders.




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References

        Anger, n.d. Controlling Anger. Retrieved April 24, 2010 from
         http://www.apa.org/topics/anger/control.aspx
        Robert, n.d. Anger Management. Retrieved April 24, 2010 from
         http://www.habitsmart.com/anger.html
        Techniques, n.d. Anger Management Techniques. Retrieved April 24, 2010 from
         http://www.anger-management-techniques.org/




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