Networking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 2 Powerful You! Inc. presents Networking & You… Perfect Together 19 Indispensable Networking Tips For Seasoned Networkers & Beginners © Copyright 2006 www.powerfulyou.com This ebooo was written for you – yes, you! If you are reading this material, you are on a journey to make the most of your networking experience, your business, your time, your relationships and your life. Please feel free to share this ebooo with everyone you know. There are benefits for everyone who reads it ~ seasoned Networkers, newbie Networkers, those seeking employment and even those who would simply like to better their communications and effectiveness in everyday life situations. When sharing the eboook we request that you keep the entire contents intact to give proper credit and attribution. This information is the copyright of Sue Urda and Powerful You! Inc. We ask that you encourage others to download their own copy of this ebooo by directing them to our website at www.powerfulyou.com Anyone who signs up will receive this ebooo as well as a link to the inspirational movie, Stepping Stones. Sharing the movie is a simple and beautiful way for you to assist the world by spreading inspiration, peace, joy and light. We encourage you to share the movie link with everyone you know, including entire mailing lists. The movie link is www.steppingstonesforyou.com Also visit our other website and share your grateful heart with the world. www.gratitudeminute.com We thank you for sharing… The world will thank you, too. Namaste` and Happy Networking.Networking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 3 Networking & You… Perfect Together 19 Indispensable Networking Tips For Seasoned Networkers & Beginners Introduction by the Author 1. Be Genuine, Be Honest, Be Yourself 2. Be a Person Other People Like to be Around 3. Ask Great Questions 4. Be the “GoTTo Gal (or Guy) 5. Clarity is Queen (or King) 6. Public Displays of Gratitude 7. Be Present – Mind, Body and Spirit 8. If You Say You’ll Call Them… Call Them 9. Take a Good Look at Yourself 10. Make New Friends But Keep the Old 11. Your Business Card – Don’t Leave Home Without It 12. Reach Out, Reach Out and Touch Someone 13. Give First, Get Later 14. Six Degrees of Separation 15. Check Your Attitude at the Door 16. Keep it Short & Sweet 17. Arrive Early and Stay Late 18. Going Once, Going Twice, Going Three Times… 19. So Many Network Meetings, So Little TimeNetworking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 4 Introduction Congratulations and welcome to the world of networking. Actually, this is simply a formal welcome… you’ve been networking since you were a child. Networking is a part of our everyday existence. Networking is a lot like many other things in life… if you can find something you love about it, you’ll do it more often, you’ll get better at it and you’ll have more satisfying results. This ebooo serves to assist you in the networking process. You may be wondering how these tips can be suitable for both the seasoned Networker and those just dipping their toes into the networking pool. Well, the answer is that no matter what level you consider yourself to be and no matter how much you think you know about networking, the success principles for networking remain the same. Beginners and experts are in the same room with the same people having the same conversations at every network meeting or any social gathering you attend. If you eavesdrop in on these conversations, you’ll know right away those people who will consider it to be a successful networking event and those who will not. You will know right away, who the “go to” people are and who the “stay away from” people are. You will know right away who is there strictly to “get” and who is there to “give”. You might ask, “Isn’t that what networking is about... to get leads and referrals and business?” The answer is yes and no. Those people who are “Natural Networkers” are the people who are genuinely enjoying themselves. They are having real conversations and taking mental notes. They are interested, conversational, and are happy to be there. They are not in a conversation to force information on the listener. They are not asking the “what can you do for me” kind of questions. They are in the flow. The only taking they are doing is the gathering of relevant information in order to have a deeper understanding of the people they meet. These are the Networkers that know what networking is all about. These are the givers. Networking is like playing an instrument. The band leader doesn’t have you play the scales once and then move on… you must practice them over and over and over again. You must play them fluidly forwards and backwards with the same sound, tone, pitch and volume. You must practice until you hear them in your sleep and start humming them, unknowingly, during the day. They must be a part of you. When you play an instrument, you practice until you get it right… AND you practice it for pleasure. The same is true of networking. There are just a few basic principles that, when practiced regularly will provide you not only more fruitful relationships, more leads, more referrals and more business… they will provide you enjoyment, personal satisfaction and business growth. And, who knows, you may even develop some relationships and friendships that last well beyond the networking meetings. Study and practice these tips. Then, enjoy the results. Happy Networking!Networking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 5 “I AM tth two most powerful words in the world, for whatever we put after them becomes our reality.” ~ Susan Howson "We are not what we know but what we are willing to learn." ~ Mary Catherine Bateson Networking & You… Perfect Together 19 Indispensable Networking Tips For Seasoned Networkers & Beginners 1. Be Genuine, Be Honest, Be Yourself When you try to impress someone else or be someone you are not – it shows. People know when you are not really the person you are trying to present yourself to be. People know if you are stretching the truth. People are smart and people are intuitive. We all have an innate sensing system that tells us whether or not someone else can be trusted. Many people rely heavily on this sense to make really important decisions… Decisions like whether or not you would make a good referral for their friends, their business associates and even some distant contacts they have. When you network – simply be yourself. 2. Be a Person Other People Like to be Around Be positive, upbeat and entertaining. Everyone likes to feel good. Everyone likes to laugh and enjoy themselves. Everyone likes the person who inspires them to smile and have fun. Everyone likes someone who can teach them something useful and interesting. In a networking situation, one of your goals is that people like you. How do you get people to like you? Be the kind of person people like to be around. Be a person who is full of good information. Be a person who is easy to be around. Be a person who is light. No one likes a stick in the mud. No one enjoys the people who are full of bad news and doom and gloom. Spread the joy and love that you ARE, and the good information that is in you. Be Likeable. 3. Ask Great Questions Ask the questions that show you care. Ask people how they feel about things. Ask them their opinion. Ask the kind of questions that people respond to by saying “That’s a great question”. What are these questions? These are the questions that show you’ve been listening to what they have said so far and you’re asking them for the next step. You’re asking them how you can use this information to refer people to them. You’re asking something relevant, something interesting, and you’re asking something for which you would like to know the answer. And most important, when you ask a question, look them in the eye and listen to their response. Asking questions allows you to direct the conversation; it puts you in the driver’s seat. So, the choice is yours, drive or go along for the ride. 4. Be the “GoTTo Gal (or Guy) Be the person others come to for information. Be someone knowledgeable and be free in sharing your knowhoow Be the connected oneNetworking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 6 in the group. When you position yourself as a helper, as willing and able to provide information, contacts and leads… people will always be willing to help you and share with you in return. They will know that whenever they need you, you are there for them, and conversely, whenever you need them, they’ll be there for you. Some people call it payback or calling in favors; others call it give and take or yin and yang. No matter what you call it, when you help someone by providing insights, information and contacts, Universal Laws are enacted. Whatever you put out, you get back. Be the one giving out great things, and great things will come back to you. Besides the many happy returns, it simply feels good to know you have helped someone. 5. Clarity is Queen (or King) When you speak, speak clearly. Make sure your thoughts are organized. Make sure you stay on topic. Answer the question that is asked. People appreciate clarity and flow. It is also important to speak loud enough so everyone who is involved in the conversation or discussion can hear you. When addressing a group of people, whether it is two or twenty, make eye contact. If you are doing your 30seccon introduction, look at the whole group – not just the facilitator or leader. Individuals feel more connected to you when you make eye contact. There is a good chance of that people will listen closely to what you say and seek you out later if you are clear and make eye contact. 6. Public Displays of Gratitude There is much you can tell about the character of a person by how they speak of other people. When you speak highly of someone else, it shows that you notice things, it shows that you appreciate things and it tells other people that if they assist you in some way, then you will also speak highly of them. Express gratitude for leads, favors and assistance whenever you have the opportunity. Express thanks for an invitation you received, for someone’s hard work and for a kind word. It feels good to be around people who are grateful, and it’s an enjoyable and highly satisfying feeling to be in a space of gratitude. 7. Be Present – Mind, Body and Spirit Yes, the first most important thing about networking and life is “showing up”. The second most important thing is being present. When you are at a meeting, be at the meeting. Be there in mind, body and spirit. Participate in discussions. When you’re at a meeting, think about what is going on at the meeting, not what’s going on somewhere else. Be in the moment. Many meetings provide forums, round tables and topics for discussion. These are perfect opportunities for you to express your true feelings and knowhho and to become known among the group. Be helpful, be courteous, and be kind. Share your stories, your experience, and your advice (when it is solicited). Having your body present in the room is only the first step to great networking. Commit to go for it … Mind, body and spirit. 8. If You Say You’ll Call Them…Call Them Follow up may be the most important part of networking, especially when you say you will. Be very careful in promising anything… especially if you might not be able to deliver. If you tell someone you’ll “You can't just sit there and wait for people to give you that golden dream. You've got to get out there and make it happen for yourself.” ~ Diana RossNetworking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 7 “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier.” ~ Mother Teresa provide information or a lead to them, do it. There’s nothing worse than not keeping our word. It is a reflection of our integrity. It’s been said of the most successful people in the world that “their word is golden”. It is a key to successful networking to be a woman (or man) of your word. If you say it, own it. If you promise it, do it. It’s that simple. Besides protecting and honoring your integrity, it is said that the fortune is in the follow up… if that’s not a good reason to follow up, there are none. 9. Take a Good Look at Yourself Yes, it matters what you wear and if anyone says it doesn’t taak a look at what they are wearing and how they present their image to the public. Chances are they might not look so successful themselves. It is said that you get about 3 seconds to make a first impression. What is yours? Take a look in the mirror and imagine that you are meeting yourself for the first time. How do you look? Do the clothes you wear, your hair, your make up and especially the expression on your face look inviting to you. Would you like to get to know you better? Would you consider doing business with you? Consider these things each time you prepare for a networking meeting. Yes, this is surface and superficial aan it matters. Psychologists tell us that we express our inside with what we look like on the outside. Take a good look at yourself and dress comfortably, dress appropriately and dress for success. 10. Make New Friends But Keep the Old The most important thing you can do when you are at a meeting is to meet new people. Many people attend network meetings and hang out with people they already know. This is great and it’s a part of what the meeting is about – to create deep, personal relationships. The second part is about meeting new people. Establishing many “loose” connections is almost as important as building the strong, close ones you already have. Step out of your comfort zone and introduce yourself… especially if there’s a brand new person at the meeting. Make it your responsibility to introduce the “newbie” to the group. If you see someone standing alone, invite them to join your conversation. This presents you as a connector, a helper and the allarooun good and caring person that you are. 11. Your Business Card – Don’t Leave Home Without It Take plenty of business cards with you and if it’s appropriate, take your brochures. Keep your cards handy in your pocket, purse, briefcase or notebook. When you meet someone, ask for their business card (only if you really want it) and have yours ready if they ask for yours. It is important for people you meet to be able to get in touch with you. You are building a network. You want to be accessible, especially when someone needs something from you or if they have a lead for you. They need to be able to reach you. On the other hand, make sure you get cards from the people you meet; this is how to build your own network. Make some notes on the back of their card, either at the meeting or as soon as you have time. What do you write? Write things that will remind you who this person “No matter how busy you are, you must take time to make the other person feel important.” ~ Mary Kay AshNetworking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 8 is and why they may be important to your network. Write their nickname, their hair color, their goals – anything that will jog your memory after the meeting is over. 12. Reach Out, Reach Out and Touch Someone It’s always appropriate to shake hands with the person you are meeting. A good firm handshake with one hand works perfectly. Twohannde handshakes are great for when you meet someone you’ve admired for a long time or when you are trying to make someone who looks uncomfortable feel more comfortable. A touch on the arm or shoulder is appropriate when you are making a specific point. People like to be touched. Touching someone makes an immediate personal connection and creates a bond, a sharing of energy. Be sensitive though when touching people, because some people aren’t used to being touched or may feel uncomfortable. If you pay attention, you will notice if the other person looks comfortable or not. If it feels awkward or they look uncomfortable, respect their feelings and keep your hands to yourself. Sensitivity to others will earn you brownie points every time. 13. Give First, Get Later It’s in the Bible and the Tao and the Torah. It’s in every etiquette book, and it’s certainly in every networking tips list on the planet. Give first. Giving does so many positive things that the universe can’t help but to give back to you. When you help someone by providing a lead, advice or knowledge, you are enacting the Universal Laws. It’s not even possible that you won’t get something in return. Specifically, the person you helped may be able to provide something to you in return. If not, no worries. Somewhere down the road, people will know you are someone who helps other people and they’ll want to know you and help you. It’s important that you don’t give with the intention of getting something in return; Give purely for the pleasure of helping others. You will find that people, circumstances and events will simply start to show up for you, sometimes from the unlikeliest of sources… that’s simply the way the universe works. Start giving today! 14. Six Degrees of Separation We’ve all heard of the six degrees of separation – the idea that everyone is connected to everyone else through six contacts or less. Think of the person you are meeting as the first degree, because they are. When you are meeting someone, keep in mind that they may be the perfect contact to get to your next biggest client, the perfect tutor for your child or your new best friend. You don’t know who they know, nor will you, unless you give them respect and time and the benefit of the doubt. Treat everyone you meet as if they are special… Because they are. 15. Check Your Attitude at the Door Remember, wherever you go, your attitude goes with you. Before you enter a meeting, take a moment to prepare yourself. Leave “I touch people. I think everyone needs that. Placing a hand on a friend's face means making contact. " ~ Diana, Princess of Wales “What I know for sure is that what you give comes back to you.” ~ Oprah WinfreyNetworking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 9 any pressures, negativity and stress at the door. You can always pick them up when you leave (chances are, you won’t want to). If you carry these feelings around with you, people will sense it. Your energy and demeanor will show it, and you may not make the impression you desire. New people you meet may not be attracted to talk to you or get to know you. If you need to blow off some steam, do it with your friends or someone who will understand. Do it with deep breathing or a quick meditation. Don’t do it with someone you don’t know. Remember, first impressions count! 16. Keep it Short & Sweet When someone asks you how you are or what you do, they don’t necessarily want to spend the whole meeting hearing about it. Having a 3066 second description of what you do, your mission or some goals is a great place to start this conversation. If they are interested or think they can help, they’ll let you know. Most people you meet are on a fact finding mission. They want to find out a few facts about you, so they can file them for future use. Don’t belabor a point or monopolize the conversation by making it all about you. Short and sweet is a great starting point. 17. Arrive Early and Stay Late The most successful Networkers know that it is before and after the meetings that people are more likely to feel free to chat. Rushing to meet people in between the speaker and the formal introductions feels rushed and doesn’t allow for conversations to flow naturally. Before and after meetings is also the time the frequent Networkers, the real connectors and the leaders are present. These people are often the most giving and the best connected. Knowing them can open many doors for you. Besides, being a connector and Go To Gal (Guy) is your goal too, so why not learn from the masters? 18. Going Once, Going Twice, Going Three Times… Showing up once is the first step. Getting out there, showing your face, speaking your peace (piece) thhes are all important to the networking process. The main thing to understand is that it is indeed a process. Consistently showing up, being present and contributing is the only way to create deep, personal lasting connections. It’s the only way you get to really know someone and to decide how and where they fit into your network. It’s also the only way people will include you in their network. People refer and do business with people they know, like and trust. In order for you to be one of those people, you have to show up, be present, and be consistent. 19. So Many Network Meetings, So Little Time We are here on this earth for an undetermined amount of time. Choose to enjoy it. Make the most of your networking time (and your life) and choose wisely where you spend it and who you spend it with. “Your attitude radiates from a place deep inside you, and its energy is so powerful that people will sense it before you have spoken even one word." ~ Lauren Solomon “Life is what you make it, always has been, always will be. “ ~ Grandma MosesNetworking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 10 Choose the meetings that are worthwhile and where you learn something. Choose the meetings that feel good to you and those where you actually like the people who attend. If you’re not enjoying yourself, people will feel it and the time you spend there may be wasted for you and everyone else in your presence. Choose to spend time with people you like and who make you feel good. When you’re feeling good, the world is your oyster. Honor yourself by feeling good about yourself, your time, your friends and your networks. Spend wisely your 86,400 seconds each day! Namaste` and Happy Networking! “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” ~ Annie DillardNetworking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 11 About Powerful You! Inc. Powerful You! is founded upon the belief that Women are powerful creators, passionate and compassionate leaders, and the heart and backbone of our world's businesses, homes and communities. Our Mission is to empower as many women as possible to find their inner wisdom, follow their passion and live rich authentic lives. Our Network welcomes all women from all walks of life. We recognize that diversity in our relationships creates opportunities. Powerful You! creates and facilitates venues for women who desire to develop connections that will assist in growing their businesses. We aid in the creation of lasting personal relationships and provide insights and tools for women who seek balance in all facets of life. Powerful You! We believe in the Power of Connections. We believe in the Power of Being Present. We believe in the Power of Relationships. We believe in the Power of Women. We believe in the Power of Devoted Groups of Collaborative and Grateful Individuals Coming Together for the Purpose of Selfdevellopmen and Assisting Others in Business and in Life We believe in a Powerful You! Powerful You! Inc. was founded in January 2005 with a few chapters in New Jersey. As of July 2007, we have 32 chapters in 10 states and our expansion continues at a rapid pace. It is our goal to reach millions of women around the world, because we know there is a need for women to come together to assist each other. The meetings feel great and the women who are attracted to attend are intelligent, caring, amazing and yes, powerful women! We invite you to join us and experience the Powerful You! difference. You may also start a chapter in your area. Visit www.powerfulyou.com for details. We invite you to sign up for our monthly newsletter, weekly event list and Daily Hmmm… Visit www.powerfulyou.com We also invite you to visit our other website www.gratitudeminute.com Namaste`Networking & You… Perfect Together © Copyright 2006 by Sue Urda. All Rights Reserved. For more information about networking and personal power for women visit www.powerfulyou.com 12 About Sue Urda Sue Urda is the CoFouunde and CEO of Powerful You! Inc. and Powerful You! Women’s Network and a twotiim honoree on Inc Magazine’s list of the 500 FastestGroowin Private Companies. Through Powerful You!, Sue assists women to grow and live rich, authentic and powerful lives through network meetings, workshops and building relationships. Ms. Urda is the author of Powerful Intentions Everyday Gratitude (January 2008), the eboook Networking and You… Perfect Together and the CoCreeato of the Inspirational Movie, Stepping Stones. Dear Friend, I wish for you a beautiful networking experience. I wish for you many great connections and vast resources that serve you. I wish for you to become the resource for others because this will serve you well. I wish for you to enjoy the process of networking and of life! Thanks for reading and sharing this eboook Namaste` and Happy Networking, For more weekly wisdom by Sue, visit www.powerfulyou.com/NetworkingWisdom.htm Enjoy the Process By Sue Urda Life is a journey, not a destination. If it is true that there is no real end, no real finish line, what does this mean for the goals we set and the everyday tasks we undertake? If the goals are always somewhere in the future and each task is not an end in itself, what does this mean for us each day as we are simply plugging along? How do we find our purpose and our joy? What do we celebrate and embrace? It is simple really… We must find our joy in the everyday doing and being. We must find the fun in the work, in the task, in the people. As we enjoy the process, we become more attractive to all those around us and we attract more connections, more business and perhaps more abundance to ourselves. Let's do it Fiin the fun and enjoy the process! Now, that's Powerful!