Wedding Etiquette - Your Most Common Wedding Etiquette Dilemmas Solved by NiceTime

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									Title:
Wedding Etiquette - Your Most Commo
n Wedding Etiquette Dilemmas Solved
!

Word Count:
1152

Summary:
Weddings bring on an onslaught of e
tiquette questions and dilemmas. A
s times change and weddings evolve,
 traditional rules of etiquette hav
e followed suit, only adding to the
 confusion. Steer through the fog
of questions with this quick look a
t the top five most common wedding
etiquette dilemmas and solutions.


Keywords:
wedding etiquette, wedding, etiquet
te, invitation, wedding attire, bar
, invitation etiquette, wedding att
ire, attire etiquette


Article Body:
As one of the biggest and most pote
ntially stressful events of your li
fe, getting engaged and subsequentl
y planning a wedding brings with it
 an onslaught of questions. As time
s change and weddings evolve, tradi
tional rules of etiquette have foll
owed suit, only adding to the confu
sion.

To gain perspective, first understa
nd that "etiquette" is above all ab
out treating people with courtesy a
nd making them feel comfortable. Wh
en an etiquette question arises, co
nsider the feelings of those who wi
ll be affected. To steer you throug
h the fog of questions, I've compil
ed a quick look at the top five mos
t common wedding etiquette dilemmas
: Family Etiquette, Invitation Etiq
uette, Gift Etiquette, Attire Etiqu
ette and The Cash Bar Issue.

Family Etiquette:

Introducing Your Parents - If the b
ride and groom's parents have not m
et prior to the engagement, traditi
on dictates that the groom's family
 calls and introduces themselves to
 the bride's family and arranges a
meeting. If the groom's parents do
not make the first introduction, th
en the bride's parents should. Nowa
days, who makes the first call is i
rrelevant; all that really matters
is that the parents meet. If meetin
g face to face is impossible, a let
ter or phone call will suffice.

Introducing Divorced Parents - If t
he groom's parents are divorced, th
e parent with the closest relations
hip to the groom should take the fi
rst step in meeting the bride's par
ents. If both sets are divorced, th
e parent closest to the groom shoul
d first contact the bride's suggest
ed parent. If no one begins the int
roduction process, the couple shoul
d step in and ensure that everyone
meets, while refraining from forcin
g potentially awkward situations.

Your In-Laws - The groom's parents
often feel left out of the planning
 process. To avoid this, invite you
r future in-laws into the initial d
ialogue. You should immediately inf
orm them of your ideas regarding lo
cation, date, size and style of the
 wedding. Take queues on their desi
red level of involvement and includ
e them accordingly. Let them make o
ffers to pitch in with finances or
planning. Above all, keep them info
rmed throughout your engagement.

Invitation Etiquette:

Inviting partners and guests - If a
n invited guest is married, engaged
 or living with a significant other
, that partner must be included in
the invitation. A single invitation
 addressed to both individuals shou
ld be sent to spouses or couples wh
o live together, while separate inv
itations should be sent to each mem
ber of an engaged or long term coup
le who don't live together. Invitin
g single guests with a date is a th
oughtful gesture, but one that is n
ot required. If you are inviting a
single guest with a date, try to fi
nd out the name of your friend's in
tended date and include that person
's name on the invitation. Otherwis
e, inner envelopes may include "And
 Guest," indicating that he or she
may bring any chosen escort or friend.

Guests Who Ask to Bring a Guest - Y
our guests should know better! It i
s never appropriate for a guest to
ask to bring a date, and you have e
very right to politely say no. Howe
ver, if you discover that a guest i
s engaged or living with a signific
ant other, you should extend a writ
ten or verbal invitation.

Invitations to out-of-town guests -
 Many brides ponder whether or not
it's appropriate to invite long dis
tance guests for whom it may be imp
ossible to attend. Use your best ju
dgment. Is this person truly a clos
e friend who would want to attend y
our celebration? If so, failing to
extend an invitation may be insulti
ng. Remember, these days friends an
d family are often spread all over
the country, and people are accusto
med to traveling. On the other hand
, if you haven't spoken in years, a
n invitation may look like no more
than a request for a gift. In those
 cases, send a wedding announcement
 instead, which carries no gift-giv
ing obligation.

Gift-giving Etiquette:

Yes, we all love to receive gifts,
and weddings are a perfect occasion
 for gift-giving. Friends and loved
 ones customarily honor the commitm
ent of the newly betrothed by showe
ring them with gifts. As the happy
couple, just remember to always fee
l privileged—not entitled. So, let'
s review a bit of etiquette as it r
elates to wedding gifts...

1) Never mention gifts (gift choice
s or gift registry) on the invitati
on.

2) Publicize your registry informat
ion by word of mouth. It's also acc
eptable to include it on a wedding
website or shower invitation (since
 showers are not typically hosted b
y the bride or groom)

3) There is no polite way to ask fo
r cash gifts. This can only be done
 through word of mouth.

4) Honeymoon registries are appropri
ate.

5) Do not use any gifts until after
a wedding.

6) All gifts, even shower gifts, mu
st be returned if the wedding is ca
ncelled or annulled before living t
ogether as a married couple.

7) Gift giving for vow renewal, rea
ffirmation ceremonies or encore wed
dings is not mandatory, but is a ni
ce gesture.

8) There is no special formula for
determining the appropriate amount
a guest should spend on a gift. The
 idea that each gift should cost as
 much as one plate at the reception
 is an impractical misconception.

Attire Etiquette:

While rules for modern wedding atti
re have evolved with the times, the
re are still traditional standards
for fabrics, lengths and styles. He
re are some guidelines:

The formality of your bridesmaids'
dresses should match that of your w
edding dress. Although traditionall
y the dresses were the same length
as the wedding gown, the rise in po
pularity of tea- and knee-length br
idesmaids' dresses has relaxed that
 rule. As long as the fabric and ov
erall style matches the formality o
f your floor-length gown, shorter b
ridesmaids' dresses are perfectly a
cceptable.

For evening weddings, guests should
 dress for a nice dinner or event -
 which includes suits (or black tie
) for men and dresses or skirts in
sophisticated colors and fabrics fo
r women. Lengths can vary according
 to the style of the event and loca
tion. Female guests may now wear bl
ack, but never white.

The Cash Bar Issue:

Yes, weddings are expensive. Yes, c
ouples should be on the lookout for
 budget saving tips. Yes, weddings
are expensive - we know. But never
- under any circumstances - should
you ever consider hosting a cash ba
r at your reception. Think about it
 - you would never ask anyone to pa
y for a cocktail in your own home.
People at your reception are still
your guests, even if the event is n
ot held in your house. That said, i
f a full bar is not within your bud
get, consider these alternatives:

Host a soft bar, in which guests ca
n order champagne, beer and wine.

Find a reception site that allows y
ou to bring in your own alcohol; yo
u will save serious cash, and anyth
ing unopened can be returned for a
full refund.

Cut down the size of your guest lis
t - the only significant way to red
uce costs in the first place.

For a complete guide to creating an
 elegant and memorable wedding cele
bration, visit http://www.elegala.c
om, your ultimate wedding planning
resource.

								
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