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Bandersnatch - Volume 32 Issue I

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Bandersnatch - Volume 32 Issue I Powered By Docstoc
					  BANDERSNATCH
                                                                                                                                                     Volume XXXII
             Plotting to destroy the moon since 1971                                                                                                      Issue III




News               Peace Walk at John Abbott
                                                                                                                        “Le paix partoute” was called by an
                                                                      a spiral to honor the rest of the protests
                                                                                                                        emotion passerby in his car. Upon ar-
Algerian Depor-    Karen Gelsthorpe
                                                                      across the continent. The spiral being
                                                                      used to protest both the unjustified war
                                                                                                                        rival at the school Ilene Young from the
                                                                                                                        unofficial group friends of Sainte-Annes
tation? Find out   News Editor                                        on Iraq and the new FTAA submit in Ec-
                                                                      uador happening on October thirty-first.
                                                                                                                        to spoke about the conflicts in Iraq and
on page 3.                                                                     Throughout the walk slogans
                                                                                                                        Afghanistan.
                                                                                                                                  The following quotes show the
                            The second annual John                    such as “We want peace. On veux la
                                                                                                                        basic reason for the march and the feel-
                   Abbott peace walk took place October                                                                 ings behind it. “People think that you
Campus             the eighth at 4 p.m in honour of the first
                   anniversary of the first bomb dropped
                                                                                                                        have to be a hippy to walk for peace,
                                                                                                                        but peace and love belong to everyone
                   on Afghanistan in the aftermath of Sep-                                                              and we shouldn’t be afraid to walk for
                   tember eleventh. The walk last year                                                                  peace.” Sara Beger-Richardson, student
Club Day and       took place on October second, six days                                                               organizer of the walk. “I’m not making a
                   prior to the first bomb, in protest of the
columns starting   unjustified war on Afghanistan. This
                                                                                                                        political statement, I just want peace”
                                                                                                                        Arpad Nagy. To leave you with the
                   year’s walk was staged primarily to
on page 6.         show that not all citizens of North
                                                                                                                        general spirit of the march “I think that
                                                                                                                        claiming the lives of innocent Iraq peo-
                   America support war, with special in-                                                                ple is not the way to achieve peace, but
                   terest on the impending bombing of                                                                   a peaceful march like this is.” Nairra
Arts               Iraq. The walk, organized by Sandra                                                                  Tariq.
                   Stevenson and Sara Beger-Richardson,                                                                       Following the walk there was a dis-
                   drew approximately forty people, con-                                                                cussion headed by Jim Joyce to help
                   sisting of students, staff and commu-              paix” and “George Bush Assassin” were
Our new Editor     nity members.                                      called out by the marchers. Upon arrival
                                                                                                                        inform the students as to what is hap-
                                                                                                                        pening in the world around them.
                            The walk departed from the                at the school a moment of silence was
introduces him-    main exit at Herzburg and crossed the              observed by the marches to honor all
                                                                      the people that have died needlessly in
self on page 9.    campus, went down Maple Avenue onto
                   the Main Street and Saint-Peter Boul-              this last year. Even some of the motorist
                   evard to finish at St-Georges school, in           got swept away in the need for peace.

Entertainment
                    Teacher Avoids Suspension
All about Sweet                                                       College, addressed to Vo-Quang, Henderson         to address this need and that proposals were
Home Alabama       Andrew Coté
                                                                      explains the school’s position on relation-       being drawn up. An important part of the
                                                                                                                        process will be that the John Abbott staff
                                                                      ships between staff members and students
on page 12.        Editor-in-Chief                                    by saying: “Your employment obligations as        will be asked to contribute in developing the
                                                                      a fiduciary require that you refrain from close   new policy.
                                                                      personal relationships with students with                Without being able to comment on the
                                                                                                                        specific case, due to the fact that it’s a con-
Sports                    Following last month’s controversy          whom you
                                                                      profes-
                                                                                                        have had any
                                                                                                        sional rela-    fidential matter between the teacher and the
                   concerning a John Abbott teacher, Cyrile Vo-
                                                                      tionship                          that involves   administration, Henderson admits that if the
                   Quang who had had a consensual relation-
                                                                      the exist-                        ence or the     school had a policy in place at the time, “the
                   ship with a student here, the decision to
Take part in our   suspend him with no pay was reversed. Ac-                                            perception of   situation wouldn’t have happened in the first
                                                                                                                        place.” Henderson explained that most uni-
                   cording to a press release from the John           the exist-                        ence of a
new Hockey         Abbott Faculty Association (JACFA), Vo-            power dif-                        ferential.”     versities have a specific policy concerning
                                                                             Although the school has no official        this matter and that in most cases, these
 pool, find out    Quang was not suspended because the
                   facts of the case were deemed “insufficient        policy on relationships between staff and         kinds of relationships aren’t tolerated or it
                                                                                                                        has to be proven that there are no issues
how on page 14.    to conclude with certainty that the serious-       students, JACFA’s letter claims that
                                                                      Henderson will “bring in a policy that em-        where the teacher is in a position of power
                   ness of the prejudice caused warrants the
                                                                      powers the Administration to control per-         over the student.
                   disciplinary action...”.
                                                                      sonal relationships among members of the                 In making up a policy for the CEGEP
                          Even though Vo-Quang avoided be-
                                                                      John Abbott community according to per-           system, the administration has to be very
                   ing suspended, the school’s administration
                                                                      ceived power differentials.” When reached         careful because here at Abbott, 34% of stu-
                   decided to give the teacher a notice of com-
                                                                      for comment, Henderson claimed that               dents are under the age of 18 and if a situa-
                   plaint for having the relationship on the ba-
                                                                      JACFA’s statement over his plan to intro-         tion like that ever happened, there would be
                   sis that it was an “abuse of power, breach of
                                                                      duce a policy for relationships was “patently     many more legal issues to be tackled. On a
                   trust, and conflict of interest in entering into
                                                                      ridiculous”. Even though the school doesn’t       final note, the College now considers this
                   a close personal relationship with a student
                                                                      have a specific policy for these kinds of rela-   specific matter closed and does not want to
                   for whom you had a personal responsibility
                                                                      tionships, Henderson informed us that the         deal with this issue publicly anymore be-
                   as a faculty member.” In a letter written by
         October 9th, 2002
                   Keith Henderson, Director General of the           administration has received a lot of requests     cause Vo-Quang has had his personal life  1
                                                                                                                        intruded enough on this issue already.
           BANDERSNATCH
         John Abbott College                                On The Side with your Editor-in-Chief Andrew Coté
            P.O. Box 2000
      St. Anne de Bellevue, QC
               H9X 3L9                                                                                    "America's Leader"
    Tel: (514) 457-6610 Ext 5389
          Fax:(514) 457-6091                                        Over the past few weeks, Presi-                                                     seem to care enough to do anything
  E-Mail: bsnatch@hotmail.com                              dent George W. Bush has been promot-                  When will Bush come to terms           about it, even though both the Dow
           Office: H-041                                   ing a war on Iraq. Threatening to open        that being the president of the United         Jones and the NASDAQ exchanges
                                                           fire on the poor and mostly-defenceless       States, his job isn’t to go postal on          have been doing absolutely horrible
                                                           population of that country, Bush has          every country that doesn’t seem to             lately. Just because another country
                                                           been trying to justify a new war by con-      agree with his views? Is it his right to       decides to disagree with some of the po-
              Editor-in-Chief                              vincing the ignorant American public          kill thousands of people all over the          sitions of the United States, does it
              Andrew Coté                                  that we need another war. Bush pro-                                                             mean they can attack them?
                                                           claims that the Iraqis have both nu-
             News Editor                                   clear and biochemical weapons and                                                                             Let’s all face reality
           Karen Gelsthorpe                                that they’re still in the process of                                                            folks, the U.S. isn’t interesting in
                                                           developing more. The latest news is                                                             helping the people of Iraq, or any
         Campus Life Editor                                that Bush now fears that Iraq is go-                                                            other country for that matter. It’s be-
         Amanda Hoogland                                   ing to attack the United States, even                                                           cause Iraq is one of the highest pro-
                                                           before they get their chance to do                                                              ducers of oil in the world, and be-
         Entertainment Editor                              so.                                                                                             cause Hussein is being an exception
          Shawn Robertson                                                                                                                                  to the rule and isn’t bowing to the
                                                                    Is it just me, or does Bush’s                                                          American’s demands. I’m not saying
              Sports Editor                                latest attempt at preparing America                                                             that the U.S. is totally wrong by go-
             Robert Menzies                                for another war seem just a little TOO                                                          ing into Iraq, but there are a lot of
                                                           see-through? Is it not too evident                                                              things going on in that country that
               Arts Editor                                 that now, more than a year after the                                                            doesn’t conform to our human rights
            Jonathan Venne                                 attacks of September 11 th , Bush                                                               standards. It certainly doesn’t mean
                                                           needs another target to blow up?                                                                that a country that claims itself as
      Assistant Editor-in-Chief                            Only because he has nothing better                                                              “one nation under god” can go
            Wendy Smith                                    to do, considering that for majority of       world just so the president’s popularity       around the world forcing around their
                                                           his presidency, all he has done is con-       points will go up a point or two? Is he        values and portraying themselves as
             Office Manager                                vince the American public that we have        scared that he won’t get re-elected be-        better than any other country.
              Jason Doan                                   to defeat the Taliban, then capture           cause the Americans won’t feel that he
                                                           Osama Bin Laden, and now we have to           has done any work for their country?
        Production Manager                                 kill Saddam Hussein.                          How about the economy? He doesn’t
          Karen Gelsthorpe

        Advertising Manager
           Naila Jinnah

            Archive Editor
          Kathleen Stanhope
                                                           News Editor's Note
         French Editor                                     with the ever Loca News Editor Karen Gelsthorpe
   Katherine Harwood-Farkas

         Games Page Editors
            Jeffrey Katz                                                                                 that we would rather kill than share? It       atrocity but how many John Abbott stu-
                                                                    The carnage in Israel and Pal-
           David Fuzes                                                                                   saddens me when in discussion at a col-        dents even know that it is happening?
                                                           estine has been happening for years
                                                           now, and almost all young adults have         lege level no one knows that there is          The people in these countries deserve
  Photographics Coordinator                                become desensitized to the pain in that       war in Africa or the Middle East. Maybe        justice, yet our governments make sanc-
       Josh Van Sprang                                     part of the world. I remember so clearly      if we all cared just a little bit more about   tions that hurt the innocent people
                                                           now watching the news, seeing the in-                                                        more. Sanctions for war crimes don't
                Webmaster                                  jured and deceased but not really                                                            help the victims.
               Brian Vrouvas                               processing the images of war. Correct                                                               Refugees are being deported from
                                                           me if I’m wrong but I think I finally un-                                                    Canada and the United states everyday,
                                                           derstand why people say that world is-                                                       they are sent back to their home coun-
                                                           sues don’t bother us unless they involve                                                     tries where they have nothing. These
                                                           us or our loved ones. Recently I                                                             innocent people have lost everything.
        Bandersnatch is the student-run Alternative
Press at John Abbott College. It is published every        watched a conflict between Arabic and                                                        Their homes, their freedom and their
two weeks and is partially funded by the Student
                                                           Jewish students unfold. Because I had                                                        pride, yet we send them back.
Activities Commitee and by advertising solicited                                                                                                               Every four seconds a child under
members.Submissions are welcome in traditionally           taken no side in the war prior to the afore
either English or French and become property of            mentioned incident I was shocked and                                                         the age of twelve starves to death and
the newspaper. Submissions must be on an IBM com-          yet for years I have known of this war.                                                      in a day the province of Quebec wastes
patible diskette along with a printed hard copy and
                                                           Is our society to desensitized to vio-                                                       more than enough foods to save almost
MUST be in Text Format (*.txt) or RichText For-                                                                                                         all of their lives. But we don't care about
mat (*.RTF). All submissions must include the full         lence? It always astounds me how little
name and telephone number of the contributor, as           we know about the rest of the world,                                                         them. Doesn't this bother anyone else?
well as the e-mail address if applicable. The staff        and even more, how little we seem to                                                                   Maybe I’m horribly naïve and a
reserves the right to reject or edit any submissions
                                                           care. Our governments do atrocious                                                           little gullible but this is how I feel. This
for length, legality, or clarity. Letters to Bander-                                                     the rest of the world it would be a bet-       is just my opinion and if you disagree
snatch should be a maximum of 500 words but may            things to other countries and we don’t
see print nonetheless if they are longer but worth-        even know about it. In our names hun-         ter place. Or maybe if the world wasn’t        or agree please let me know. I want to
while. Neither spelling nor grammar will be cor-           dreds of people die each year, and we         about the economy than everyone                know if I’m the only one that feels like
rected on letters to the editors, it is the responsibil-
                                                           are oblivious.                                would be better of, because people             this. I’ll leave you with my final
ity of the contributor to correct them.                                                                  should be more valuable than poses             thoughts and questions. How many tel-
        Submissions and letters should be dropped                   Is our society getting to the
off at the Bandersnatch office, located in the base-       point where anarchy is expectable? Are        ions.                                          evisions would it take to buy a life?
ment of Herzberg, H-041 (across from the Hallway           we that attached to our material things                The civil war in Rwonda is an
entrance of the oval)
 Algerian Deportation in Canada
                                                      in the past seven years of civil war withstanding      with its shocking statistics. The general condi-        stay. The only problem is,Ahmed is 2. ‘The immi-
                                                      the 7,000 civilians killed in 1998 alone. These        tions described by the prisoners were of all of         gration minister said, “You can leave your son
Nairra Taria                                                                                                                                                         here, but you have to go back.” said Bourousia.
                                                      numbers alone mean nothing. It is when you             dark and dirty cells overcrowded with no or little
Contributor                                                                                                  bedding. Often there was no access to toilette          The 37-year-old was an accountant in his home-
                                                      add the faces of women, children, and helpless
                                                      old men that one feels the urge preventing those       facilities thus prisoners were reduced to using         land, his 36-year-old wife was a day-care director
                                                      being thrown back in to this pit of fire.              the cell. The smell and mess with no or little food     in Algeria and is now expecting for the second
                                                                  It seems Canada has raised its stand-      created a highly unhygienic environment prone           time, only the stress is interfering with her preg-
        Canada. Land of the free. A place for the                                                            to disease. Relatives were harassed to discour-         nancy. Yakout’s doctor, Dr. David Morris of the
                                                      ards for sympathy. However, it is needless to say
oppressed to begin a new life. A life of liberty, a                                                          age from visiting. A report done by the Medical         Royal Victoria Hospital confirmed that stress
                                                      that the abuse and tor-
life full of choices and opportunities. A life they                                                                      Foundation, in which 66 men who had         threatens pregnancy, “This is a inhumane way of
                                                      ture faced by the Alge-
had dreamed of. For the 1000 Algerian refugees                                                                           been detained by authorities stated that    dealing with a complex emotional and political
                                                      rians today calls for hu-
deported, thanks to our government this<life>                                                                            45% were sexually assaulted, two oth-       issue”, said Dr. Morris, “This is obvious profil-
                                                      man compassion all
will remain a dream.                                                                                                     ers described being humiliated by be-       ing, but their profiling the wrong people”.
                                                      over the world. A study
        Decades of internal conflict between rival                                                                       ing kept naked in their cells and taunted           Canada is a country of peace and human
                                                      done by the Medical
political parties has paralysed Algeria. Existing                                                                        by police officers. Sixteen men were        compassion and as Canadians we all embody
                                                      foundation for the Care
conflicts between the FLN (Front – Liberation de                                                                         electrocuted in the genitals and other      this doctrine. We take pride in our peace mis-
                                                      of Victims of Torture
National) and its many political enemies such as                                                                         barbaric methods I can not describe in      sions to Bosnia or the aid we’ve provided to
                                                      reported, 70 asylum
the FFS (Front des Forces Socialites) have claimed                                                                       this article. Each one of these men has     those in crisis, yet when the Algerians came to us
                                                      seekers in the U.K. be-
the lives of many. The governments lust for power                                                            already died once are we leaving them destitute         asking for help, the Canadian Gov't abandoned
                                                      tween April 1994 and March 1995 aged between
has driven them to take up arms leaving many                                                                 to die again?                                           the principals of our nation and closed our doors
                                                      25 and 35of which all described being punched,
civilians in the dark streets stained by the blood                                                                       The Canadian response to this plea of       to these victims of war. In their land their crime
                                                      slapped, and hit with objects (particularly trun-
of their neighbours or if lucky dead. The Cana-                                                              mercy has been a mockery of our constitution of         was birth, but what was their crime here? Canadi-
                                                      cheons). Other methods included, electric shocks
dian government deciding to ignore these facts                                                               human rights. According to the Minister of Immi-        ans lamented the loss of 2800 people who died in
                                                      (28%) burning (16%) sexual harassment and rape
and lift the moratorium has only left those seek-                                                            gration Denis Coderre, refugees who have been           the attacks of 9/11, yet we fail to acknowledge the
                                                      (41%) and <chiffon> (41%) this is the tyrants
ing refuge in Canada helpless.                                                                               deported may have the right to leave their Cana-        hundreds and thousands of those who have
                                                      specialty in which a wedge is placed in the vic-
            Though some have abandoned the                                                                   dian born children behind however the govern-           died in the past few years in Algeria, and
                                                      tims mouth while contaminated water is poured
hopes of these victims of war others have gone                                                               ment takes no responsibility for them. The Ga-          now the blood of the next thousands dead
                                                      in to the helpless victims stomach until he or she
through great pains to make the Algerian cry                                                                 zette’s Sue Montgomery reported a recent case           will be on the hands of Canada.
                                                      vomits and to make it easier the torturer contin-
heard. The Medical Foundation for the Care of                                                                of an Algerian couple forced to leave the country.
                                                      ues to kick the victim in the stomach.
Victims of Torture in London has treated people                                                              Mourad Bourousia and his wife Yakout Seddiki
                                                                  For years Algerian jails have been sub-
traumatized by the inhumane crimes subjected to                                                              have been ordered to leave Canada, their Cana-
                                                      jecting it’s people to inhumanity. Once again the
in their native land since 1986. According to the                                                            dian born son Ahmed, however, is allowed to
                                                      Medical Foundation has astounded the world
foundation as many as 77,000 people have died




      What's                                                                                SUJAC Update
      Going                                                  SUJAC UPDATE
                                                             Congratulations to The Gamers
                                                      Club for winning the Best Booth Award
                                                                                                                   Your Student Union is busy work-
                                                                                                             ing for you! Congress, SUJAC=s legis-
                                                                                                             lative body, is currently working on five
                                                                                                                                                                     Project Team is lining up a series of
                                                                                                                                                                     speakers: motivational speakers to en-
                                                                                                                                                                     tertain and inspire students, and aca-
                                                      at this semester=s SUJAC-Club Day!                     great projects that, when taken together,               demic speakers to give talks about en-
      On...                                           SUJAC, Christian Fellowship,
                                                      Bandersnatch, the Pagan Club, Hillel,
                                                                                                             will foster positive student experiences
                                                                                                             at JAC and defend the greater interest
                                                                                                                                                                     vironmental, political, religious, or other
                                                                                                                                                                     issues. This Team is also looking at the
                                                      Amnesty International, Gamers, the                     of the student body. These Project                      possibility of joining forces with other
       On October 17th there will be a public         M u s l i m St u d e n t s = A s s o c i a t i o n ,   Teams are: SUJAC/Congress PR, Stu-                      Abbott Clubs and organizations to plan
lecture at Concordia University. “The Tree            Anime, Break Dancing, CSKY, and the                                                                            fantastic events.
of Life or the Web of Life.” Will be in the           Outdoor Adventure Club, Rock Climb-                                                                                  The Campus Project Team is look-
main auditorium H-110 and will be free for            ing and Kayaking were showcased at                                                                             ing into improving security in the
all. Dr W. Ford Doolittle from Dalhousie Uni-         this semester=s lively SUJAC-Club                                                                              Abbott parking lots and is coming up
versity will be the speaker. For more infor-          Day. CSKY played live, SUJAC reps                                                                              with creative ideas on how to keep the
mation call 848-2595.                                 were on hand to meet the College com-                                                                          campus clean. Why not give them a
                                                      munity, Clubs and student organiza-                                                                            hand and pick up garbage B even if it=s
      On October 31st there will be protest           tions recruited more members and put                                                                           not your own!
against the FTAA, the summit that will be in          on great demos—Dancing, Games,                                                                                       The group of students working on
Ecuador on the same day.                              Charactures, and more—and there                                                                                the Academics Team has an ambitious
                                                      were lots of great munchies. Remem-                    dent Activities/Affairs, Campus, Aca-                   project for this semester. They are aim-
         Trip to Dominican Republic in the win-       ber, this is a bi-annual event, so there               demics, and Transit. Each team is de-                   ing to set up a homework hotline or
ter                                                   is more fun coming up next semester!                   veloping its own set of goals and has                   message board where students can get
                                                             The JAC Halloween Party for                     already started getting them off the                    a bit of help on their assignments dur-
     Stress-reduction seminar every                   Kids is coming up on Friday, October                   ground.                                                 ing the Learning Centre=s off-hours.
wednesday with Jim Katz in Ho-340                     25. Come help kids celebrate a spooky                        The SUJAC/Congress PR team is                           Last, but certainly not least, the
                                                      Halloween! If you like having fun, and                 looking at setting up a bi-weekly SUJAC
         Mont st-Anne ski trip January fith to        leading games and activities for ador-                 info booth. This team is also focusing
tenth.                                                able kids and/or doing volunteer work,                 its energy on assuring that all College
                                                      we would love to see you at the Hal-                   Committees have student reps sitting on
                                                      loween Party. Drop by Student Activi-                  them, thus making into account.
                                                      ties and see Jill for more information                       The Student Activities/Affairs
                                                      and to sign up to help.


                          October 9th, 2002                                                                                                                                                                      3
Puppy Mills in Canada....
                                               forced to live their entire lives in such         300 dogs from three different locations.     Adopting from the SPCA would also
                                               appalling conditions. They are kept for                     There are many ways that you       help out greatly, as there is very little
Sabrina Hamilton                               one reason only, and that is to produce                                                        room and so many animals in need of a
                                                                                                 can help to prevent puppy mills from
Staff Writer                                   more puppies. Female dogs are kept                continuing their operations. For start-      home. For more information concerning
                                               pregnant from their maturity right until          ers, do not buy a puppy from pet shops.      the SPCA call 514-735-2711 or visit their
                                               they are unable to produce any more               A lot of the pet shops receive their pup-    web site at spca.com you could also
      Puppy mills, for those of you who
                                               puupies. Once their reproductive ca-              pies from puppy mills. If you buy a          visit their Montreal branch at 5215 Jean-
don’t know, are facilities that produce
                                               pacities are waned, the dogs are simple           puppy from the pet shop it                                  Ta l o n We s t n e a r t h e
pure bred dogs to be sold to the unsus-
                                               killed. There is no mercy given to those          will only aid in the growth                                 Namur metro stop.
pecting public, purely for profit. The
                                               who can no longer serve the purpose.              of puppy mills around                                                    As stated ear-
puppies are sold either via
                                                                           Puppy mills           Canada. Secondly, if you                                    lier, there are pet shops
the Internet, through news-
                                                 can be costlya r e r a m p a n t i n t h e      do buy from a pet shop, do                                  who buy their puppies
paper ads, at the mill itself
                                                 for owners andUnited States and are             some investigating and                                      from puppy mills; how-
or through brokers or pet
                                                 e a s i l yheard of on a regular                find out where the puppy                                    ever, there are those who
shops. There are many
                                                 avoided.         basis. In Canada how-          in question came from. The                                  do not. In no way is this
problems with this method
                                                                  ever, the term puppy           puppies sold from these                                     article advocating the
of breeding. For one the
                                                 Unfortunately,mill is quite rarely heard        puppy mills may not show                                    boycott of purchases from
dogs used for breeding are
                                                 many of theseof. That is why it was             evident signs of disease or                                 pet shops. It is simply re-
kept in deplorable condi-
                                                 dogs        a r esuch a shock to hear of        genetic inferiorities meaning watch your     minding the public of the issue of puppy
tions. There is a lack of vet-
                                                                  a puppy mill raid in           puppy carefully after purchase to en-        mills. This article is intended to urge the
erinarian care, poor food
                                               Vaughan, Ontario. The Ontario Society             sure that it remains healthy. Also, if you   public to make inquiries as to where the
and shelter, lack of socialization, and
                                               for the Prevention of Cruelty to Ani-             have the time, you could always volun-       animal in question has come from be-
overcrowded cages. The dogs are al-
                                               mals had seized 150 dogs and 30 pup-              teer for the SPCA and help find homes        fore the purchase has been made.
most always inbreed, which means that
                                               pies from a couple running the opera-             for those dogs (and cats) that don’t
the puppies inherit many different ge-
                                               tion. Later reports stated that the cou-          have one. The SPCA is always in need
netic diseases, which can appear up to
                                               ple had a second mill at another Ontario          of more volunteers. If you don’t have
a year after the pups are born. This
                                               location which has also since been shut           the time to volunteer, the SPCA would
means for the unwitting consumer, an
                                               down. Also in recent months the On-               also greatly appreciate any donations
array of veterinarian problems con oc-
                                               tario SPCA has rescued an estimated               that you would be willing to donate.
cur without warning. These problems




     Maryland Killer
                                               not been able to prove that all of the
Robert Menzies                                 shootings are related to each other, but
Sports Editor                                  suspect that they are. Each of the victims
                                               was shot once with a .223-caliber bullet,
                                               and experts have been able to determine
                                               that the same rifle was used in at least
      Six people have died and two have        four of the shootings. This rifle could be
been wounded in sniper attacks around          anything from a banned assault rifle to a
the D.C./Maryland area since Wednesday,        common hunting rifle, according to foren-
October 2nd.                                   sics experts.
      The attacks seem to be completely               “They still all appear to be random
random, as authorities have not been able      victims,” said Montgomery County Police
to establish any kind of link between the      Chief Charles Moose. “They don’t appear
victims; the killer is attacking both men      to be anyone’s enemy, don’t appear to be
and women, their ages range from 13 years      involved in anything coordinated. Just
old to 72 years old, and their employment
range from program analysts to cab driv-
ers to middle school students. The only
                                               simply random targets, innocent people
                                               who happen to be in the area and have
                                               been unduly harmed.”
                                                                                                                                  AD
thing that seems to link them is the area in          There is a $160,000 reward for any-
which the shootings took place: the first      one who can provide information leading
five were in Montgomery County, Mary-          to the identification and arrest of the killer,
land, over a span of 16 hours from 6 P.M.      an amount which has tripled since Satur-
Wednesday evening to 10 A.M. Thursday          day. Police are investigating the possibil-
morning. The sixth happened at 9:15 that       ity that a white van, possible in Isuzu or a
evening in Washington, D.C., the seventh       Mitsubishi, with black lettering on the side
on Friday afternoon in Fredericksburg,         might be involved, as a witness saw such
Virginia and the eighth took place yester-     a vehicle speeding away from a Post of-
day morning at 8:09, outside Benjamin          fice parking lot on Thursday morning,
Tasker Middle School in Bowie, MD. All         where the fourth victim was shot.
of these locations are within 60 miles of             The six dead victims have been iden-
each other. The victims in Fredericksburg      tified as James D. Martin, 55, James L.
and in Bowie were wounded but are in sta-      Buchanan, 39, Prenkumar Walekar, 54,
ble condition. The rest were killed.           Sarah Ramos, 34, Lori Ann Lewis-Rivera,
      Police have not determined any facts     25, and Pascal Charlot, 72. The two survi-
about the killer, or even been able to de-     vors have not been identified, aged 43 and
termine how many there are. They have          13.

    4                                                                                                                                                  Bandersnatch
                                                                                 Opinion
Multipurpose? More like Multi-Useless                                                        the good computer lab are better then         or so, eventually you would see me with
                                                moving it around, and just before you
                                                can get it towards Internet Explorer, the    the one I have at home. But I mean            my hair sticking out in all directions
                                                icon vanishes. The computer then hums        come on, I can understand budget prob-        from the static coursing through me.
David Fuzes                                     again and the whole computer shuts off       lems and the need to get donations and        Granted not all of the computers run like
Student                                         and reboots itself. Talk about irritating!   what not regarding computer equip-            this, but for the ones that do, maybe
                                                That was my experience with the first of     ment, but there is a limit. I can also see    send someone up there to check them
                                                three computers I tried in the multipur-     that the multipurpose lab is just for gen-    out? And clear out the ones that don’t
                                                pose lab that day. The third didn’t seem     eral things and I’m thinking it’s not used    work so the school doesn’t end up hav-
                                                to have enough memory to support             as often as the other ones are. So            ing ill-tempered students walking
           It all starts at 8:30 on a Friday
                                                opening up the Internet and the screen       putting in computers that run O.K or          around in the wee morning hours on a
morning. You walk into class and sit
                                                then totally fuzzed out on me.               just fine is all great, but at least put in   Friday. (Yes, to me the wee morning
down tired and irritated as hell to have
                                                      Before anything is said about the      some that work? The buzzing noise             hour’s end at about 11am)
to wake up that early, on a Friday of all
                                                good computer labs, yes I went in and I      made me think that if I were to work with
the damned things. Just as you sit down
                                                was impressed, heck the computers in         the computer I was first on for an hour
and stretch, cracking fingers and yawn-
ing away at least some of the sleep,
your teacher walks in and tells you to
get up. “This next assignment will be
done in the computer lab, 2 floors up”.
Stifling the urge to kill, you stand and
follow the class up the long flight of
stairs, push open the red staircase doors
and turn to your right, walk down to the
end and enter a small lab to the left.
Computers occupy both walls and a
small island in the middle. The class sits
down and you follow suit, picking the
computer desk that seems to have the
most comfortable chair for 8:45 in the
morning.
       The assignment is handed out and
you read it. Start up Internet Explorer,
go to the John Abbott web page and
find your way to the Accueil section in
                                                                             Campus Plus Ad
student activities, etcetera. So you flick
the computer on and it starts buzzing a
little bit. Not the normal sound you
would hear from a computer but you
think, "What the hell? As long as I get
the work done". Windows starts up
and then the buzzing sort of dulls down
to an irritating hum, the loading proc-
ess is still going so you wait a bit longer,
maybe chat with a friend or just rifle
through your belongings. Now here is
where the fun starts: looking back at the
screen, you hear a small click and the
screen goes all fuzzy, the edges fraying
just a bit and you can’t remotely see
anything except for maybe the windows
icon. You look around the room to see if
you can get to another workstation but
it’s all the way across the room and eve-
ryone is between you and the compu-
ter. Nearing 9 o’clock, you don’t par-
ticularly feel like having to make your
way through an obstacle course of your
friends and classmates. You decide you
can at least get the job done fast
enough to leave. Guess what? That’s
not even close to what’s going to hap-
pen next. You take the mouse pad and
shake it for a few seconds to get the
mouse-ball to un-stick. Then, you start


       IMPORTANT: The opinions ex-
pressed on this page do not necessarily re-
flect those of the Bandersnatch or any of its
members.

      Letters to the Editor and/or Opinion
pieces     may      be    addressed     to
bsnatch@hotmail.com with ATTN:Editor-in-
Chief written as the subject.


                       October 9th, 2002                                                                                                                                       5
  Campus Life
  With Editor Amanda Hoogland

Bandersnatch Elections LemonChallenge                                                               This year at club day many brave people pushed their tastebuds to the max and
                                                                                              attempted the lemon challenge. The challenge was to eat half a lemon in as little time as
                                                                                              possible. We would like to thank everyone who participated. Here are the results:
Andrew Coté                                            News Editor: Karen Gelsthorpe
Editor-in-Chief                                                                                     1-Andrew Coté           6secs                  9-Josh Van Sprang 15secs
                                                      Campus Life Editor: Amanda                    2-Karen Gelsthorpe      9secs                  10-Marc Nakhlem 19secs
                                                  Hoogland                                          3-Sim Robitaille       10secs                  11-Bob Menzies 20secs
        On      Tuesday       October      1st,                                                     4-Ryan Broyere         10secs                  12-Jason Doan      22secs
                                                       Arts Editor: Jonathan Venne                  5-Melissa Rawlings     12secs             13-Suzanne Brunelle 26secs
Bandersnatch members had their latest round
of elections. Due to a large amount of gradu-                                                       6-Jessica van Leeuwenkamp 14.5secs
                                                       Assistant Editor-in-Chief: Wendy             7-Jeff Katz            15secs
ations last semester, many important execu-
                                                                      Smith                         8-Natalie Gibb         15secs
tive positions were still empty at the be-
ginning of the year. In order to resolve this,
                                                                            Advertisement
the Bandersnatch team worked hard the
                                                                       Manager: Naila
first few weeks of school to recruit new
                                                                       Jinnah
members and as a result, we have success-
fully managed to fill up our entire execu-
tive staff. Even though our executive staff
                                                                            Games Page
                                                                                              Listerine Challenge
                                                                       Editors: Jeffrey
is full, we are always looking for more writ-
                                                                       Katz & David Fuzes           Another club day event at the Bandersnatch booth was the listerine challenge.Five
ers, copy editors and people to help around
                                                                                              extremely brave individuals attempted the listerine                             chal-
the office. If you’re interested in our paper,
                                                                           Photographics      lenge. They held a mouthful of yellow listerine in                              their
feel free to drop by our office anytime in H-
                                                                       Coordinator: Josh      mouth for as long as they could. Here are the results:
041 and we’ll be glad to introduce you to the
                                                  Van Sprang                                        1-Josh Van Sprang 1hour!!!
staff and find out how you can get involved.
                                                                                                    2-Jason Doan           7mins 45secs
During the coming year, the Bandersnatch
                                                                                                    3-Virendre Masand 2mins43secs
team will continue to fill up positions as they
                                                                                                    4-Sabrina Caristo 1min
open up, so now would be a good time to
                                                                                                    5-Toina Lionessa 1sec
get involved. Here is
        the make up of the new executive:




SUJAC Club Day
                                                   with council representatives ready to      notices to each of the clubs, and then                Because of the vast array of in-
Wendy Smith                                        take questions from students, explain      leave it up to them to decide whether to      terests and viewpoints among Abbott’s
Assistant Editor-in-Chief                          what the union does, and essentially,      participate or not.” Abbott is home to        many clubs, one may think that cram-
                                                   describe how it services the student       many diverse clubs covering socio-po-         ming such diversity into one area would
                                                   population.                                litical, religious, athletic, recreational,   invite discord among the students.
                                                                                              and cultural pursuits, but only about a       However, Ferguson affirmed that CEGEP
                                                          “SUJAC has always had a prob-       dozen of them had set up a booth.             students “are much more accepting of
       On Wednesday, October 2nd, the              lem letting students know about it and     Nonetheless, the Agora was packed             each others’ beliefs.” He pointed out
Student Union of John Abbott College               the services it offers,” said Dan          with curious students, music, and             that during John Abbott’s Multicultural
hosted its annual Club Day activity.               Ferguson, council president. Club          games that sometimes verged on the            Week, students who come from coun-
Groups of students from all corners of             Day gives the organization a chance        grotesque.                                    tries that may be at war with one an-
the school, from rock climbers to                  to interact with students and inform                                                     other work together and interact with
breakdancers, gathered in the Agora to             them about the basic procedures of                The year’s “Fall Harvest” theme        each other in peace, and even endeav-
show what their club was all about, re-            student government and how they can        was reflected in much of the decor, and       our to learn more about each other’s
cruit new members, and host various                get involved.                              some of the games - SUJAC even held a         culture.
contests and games. This year’s theme                                                         pumpkin-drawing contest. CSKY
was “Fall Harvest.”                                        “It’s pretty much run by the       played their music, members of the                   Despite the obvious contrasts,
                                                   students. There’s lots of planning in-     breakdancing club demonstrated a few          club members all had one thing in com-
        All day long, the Agora pulsed             volved, but it’s spread out among a        moves, and the Outdoor Adventure club         mon: they were there to have fun and
with excitement and activity, as the di-           lot of people. Each of the clubs does      had students climbing underneath the          enlighten students about their clubs
verse groups of students that form the             its own thing,” explained Jill Gowdey,     tables in the Agora. Students also par-       and their passions. “It’s all for fun,”
lifeblood of John Abbott College’s                 chairperson of Student Activities and      ticipated in an interactive video dance       laughed Gowdey. “It’s a chance for stu-
unique identity came together. Enthu-              advisor to SUJAC. “Once you add it         game, as well as Bander’s Lemon and           dents to show off what they’re up to.”
siastic students crowded around booths             all up, there’s quite a bit of work that   Listerine challenges. Last but not
set up by CSKY Radio, the Christian                goes into it.”                             least, some Gamers participated in a
Fellowship club, the Gamers' Club, Am-                                                        milk drinking contest (watching this
nesty International, the Pagan club, the                  SUJAC played a major role in        was not for the faint-of-heart - or stom-
Muslim Students Association , the Out-             organizing Club Day. “We usually           ach.)
door Adventure club, and many others.              start setting up about two weeks in
Of course, SUJAC itself was also there,            advance,” said Ferguson. “We send


    6                                                                                                                                             Bandersnatch
                                                                                                                            Sexcapades
                                                                                                            with Alita Tralene
                                                                                                     We’re now in the middle of Week Seven          toning it down just yet). I can just hear the com-
                                                                                             and wow... that’s halfway done the semester! Oh,       ments flying now: “Light bondage?” “Ok, we
                                                                                             wait, that means midterms are just around the          knew she was a freak...”, etc but let me first define
      I used to watch a lot of television     mentaries and streaming video. And it’s        corner... That is if I had any (don’t you just hate    what I mean by light bondage. It is not that leather-
when I was younger, but back then I           like news reporters aren’t trying              people in the bo-bo programs?) Now before I go         handcuff-ball-gag-whipping-until-your-flesh-is-
was too young to realize how every-           anymore, they used to show some bad            on with the topic of this week I would like to         raw stuff you see on Kink. Light means the much
thing on television these days is crap.       stories and some good stories, so that         address an issue that was brought up at the pre-       more people friendly version of it, faux-bondage
There are only two shows I will actu-         way people didn’t get too depressed.           vious Bandersnatch meeting: apparently my col-         if you will. It involves binding wrists together
ally make time to watch; C.S.I and            What was the last bit of good news             umn is too offensive to some readers. After my         (with something soft), blindfolding, maybe a bit
Futurama, that’s it. To me, everything        we’ve gotten lately? That little girl who      initial response (which was “What do you ex-           of spanking (whatever floats your boat), etc. This
else is either a failed attempt to make a     escaped from those kidnappers. Other           pect from a sex column? If you don’t like it don’t     may sound like a bit much to some people so
sitcom or a TV series that has been run-      than that the only thing we hear about         read it.”) I realized that maybe I should take into    only try it if you feel totally comfortable with it
ning for way too long. When will some-        is big corporations going bankrupt,            consideration the public’s opinion and tone it         (i.e. don’t let your significant other pressure you)
one put “The Simpsons” out of their           CEO’s going to jail, the stock market go-      down a bit. Not that I ever found it offensive, I      but on the whole it’s basically some harmless
misery?                                       ing down the shitter, terrorism running        mean I have to go out of my way to use clinical        role-playing. One of the few places a Dungeons
                                              rampant, and the Catholic priests run-         terms and euphemisms and trust me, it’s not easy       and Dragons loser can shine... (I’m totally kid-
      Sports:                                 ning after boys as if they were teenage        pulling that off without being redundant. You          ding, I don’t mean that at all in fact I’m dating one
                                                                    girls. I live by the     will never find a “dirty” word in my column (as        right now and love him anyway). Just make sure
      I never was                                                   saying, “No news         much as I’d love to get that printed). Of course I     that you and your opposite can handle it. Figure
much of a athletic per-                                             is good news.”           haven’t made a decision just yet, that wouldn’t        out who’s going to be the submissive (one who
son but I did enjoy                                                 Actually, I guess a      be fair for only two to three people complained        gets tied up) and who’s going to be the domi-
playing sports with                                                 better quote would       and all those who enjoyed the article didn’t say       nant (one who’s in control). It may sound stupid
my friends, not in a                                                be “ignorance is         anything because, well, if you like something do       but do you really want to get all hyped up about
league or anything                                                  bliss.”                  you go out of your way to say something? No,           finally giving complete (pretend) control over to
(other     than      the                                                                     of course not, only if you didn’t. So this issue I’m   your S.O., get all bound up (literally) and then
softball league when I                                                    Reality-           giving everyone a chance to respond either by          have them turn to you after five minutes of un-
was 12) I would play                                                 Based Television:       email, dimensya@hotmail.com, snail mail (just          certain ministrations and ask what you want them
just about any sport                                                                         drop it off in the Bandersnatch office, H-041, right   to do to you? I thought not.
because it was fun and                                                     I used to be      across from the Oval) or by word of mouth...                   Well I’m out of space... Next time I’ll ease
exciting, but to watch                                              a big fan of these       That means tell me or a friend who knows me or         up on the opening rant. Read me next time!
sports on TV, to me, is                                             kinds of shows,          a Bandersnatchian.                                             Stolen Quote of the Day: “It’s never a good
the most boring thing
in the world. There’s
                                                                           Right-
                                                                    until I realized that
                                                                    they're NOT real-
                                                                                                     That aside I will continue on with the topic
                                                                                             of the day: Light Bondage (I didn’t say I was
                                                                                                                                                    sign when you’re tired before sex.”

no excitement, no adrenaline, no move-        ity. Who gets stuck on a desert island
                      eous Insanity
ment! It’s like watching a porno just for
the story. Sure, I can understand when
                                              and has to play games to win stuff like
                                              food or a car? Who lives in a house for
people watch the finals and semi finals       4 months with no contact with the out-
since it’s when the players play their        side world while they, once again, do
best, but exhibition games is just an ex-     games to win food or a car? How is that
cuse to pay these players millions and        reality? It’s not real, it’s spontaneous,
millions of dollars. It’s amazing how sad     it’s unscripted, but it’s not real, hell, if
some players get when they come in            we use those standards of judging
second place. It’s not like they only get     what’s reality based television, then
paid if they win, now that would make         “Who’s Line Is It Anyway?” should
sports on television interesting.             also be considered reality-based televi-
                                              sion. And it’s all we ever see these days
      Although watching team sports           on television; we’ve had 4 survivors, 3
on television is dull, there’s nothing        Big Brothers, 2 Moles, like 42 Real
more mind numbing, brain melting,             Worlds, 2 Amazing Races, and every
poke-a-needle-in-my-eye-boring than           other variations of these knock-offs.
                                              Here’s an idea, why don’t we just put
watching golf. There’s an old saying
that “Golf is a good walk spoiled.” Well,
watching golf on TV is a good after-
                                              video cameras in everybody's house
                                              and everyone can just watch each
                                                                                                                                          Ad
noon wasted. Did you ever notice they         other! The best part would be that you
always speak very softly whenever             could watch your own life and never
there’s a golf match on TV? You know          realize that you are being watched since
what? It’s not because the player needs       you would be too out of touch with re-
to concentrate, it’s because they know        ality to notice that the fat ass sitting
the viewers at home are asleep and            on the couch eating the pork rinds and
don’t want to wake them up.                   Budweiser is you.

      The News:

      I don’t like watching the news
anymore; the fact that nothing positive
is going on lately makes it hard to go
on in life, so I don’t need to have it told
to me 6 times a day with colour com-



                      October 9th, 2002                                                                                                                                                           7
                                       Righteous Insanity
                                       Righteous Insanity                                                  Not So Free Anymore
                                                                                                                                                                     pay for sending messages via msn?
                                                   Amazing Grace                                            David Newman                                      Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that. The prob-
                                                                                                            Staff Writer                                      lem is that the general population only
                                                                                                                                                              knows of the services that are advertised a
                                                        with Kristen Rice                                                                                     great deal. Since advertising costs money,
                                                                                                                      So, they just keep pushing for you      the services have to pay off eventually for
        You have been saved by grace through            sins because you were never perfect, and
                                                                                                           to purchase more mail space. Evil Microsoft        the company or the services will be point-
believing. You did not save yourselves; it was a        I’m sorry to break it to you but you never
                                                                                                           it trying to make tons of money by charging        less. It’s difficult for non-profit organiza-
gift from God. It was not the result of your own        will be.
                                                                                                           for their email service. They’ve been gradu-       tions to get the word out about their great
efforts, so you cannot brag about it.                             Grace is free for anyone who be-
                                                                                                           ally taking out features such as their POP         new free email service. They don’t have the
        Hebrews 4:15-16                                 lieves. So what about all those things you
                                                                                                           support and now they're deleting copies of         type of recourses that the big companies
        I have so often heard people say, “I know       still do that make you not-so-perfect? Life is
                                                                                                           sent messages after 30 days. This one is           have.
I’m a good person, I’ll go to Heaven” or “I’m           an ongoing spiritual battle. There will al-
such a bad person anyway, why should I bother...                                                           really pissing people off. Don’t surrender
                                                        ways be obstacles to conquer. There will                                                                      Don’t pay for a service without look-
I’ll never get to Heaven.” Although the people                                                             your credit card numbers; the battle isn’t
                                                        always be something that you need to over-                                                            ing at the alternatives. There is most likely
who say these things may lead very different                                                               over yet. There’s a way to get around this
                                                        come. But God will know the nature of your                                                            something similar out there that is free. It
lives (one may be a notorious drug dealer, while                                                           recent irritation. Copies of sent messages
                                                        heart. He will see if you’re earnestly trying                                                         just takes a bit of searching. Of course, the
the other volunteers at the food bank every                                                                will only be deleted if they’re in the “Sent
                                                        to release yourself from your sins, or if you’re                                                      search engines might be in on it too. As
week), there is still one thing that remains true for                                                      Messages” folder. The solution is as fol-
                                                        just doing them because you know He’ll                                                                paranoid as this may sound, it’s true. Many
both of them. Neither has even the slightest                                                               lows: Create a new folder within hotmail,
                                                        forgive you anyway. He will also equip you                                                            search engines will place a website at the
chance of getting into Heaven without the freely                                                           move your messages from the “Sent Mes-
                                                        with the tools you need to win this spiritual                                                         top of their results list if they’ve been paid
given Grace of God.                                                                                        sages” folder to the new folder and voila!
                                                        battle, and be liberated from the shackles of                                                         to do so. If you’re not careful, they’ll blend
        It may be true that some people’s sins are                                                         The copies of your sent messages will no
                                                        sin.                                                                                                  in nicely with all the other results. The msn
more obvious than others, but the Bible tells us                                                           longer be deleted. It’s pretty simple and it
                                                                  To get right down to the nitty-gritty                                                       search engine does this. The text that in-
that ALL have fallen short of the glory of God. So                                                         works, at least for now.
                                                        of it all, it doesn’t matter who you are, or                                                          forms the user that the link is that of a spon-
if no one is spiritually healthy, then Heaven’s         what you do. There is still only one thing
                                                                                                                  It’s just not free like it used to be. We   sor is small and is easily missed. If you don’t
going to be a pretty vacant little place, right?        that can get you into Heaven, and that is
                                                                                                           are being pressured more and more to pay           look close enough you might click on a spon-
WRONG     .                                             Grace through Jesus. Think about that the
                                                                                                           for online services. Services like free email      sored link and another 15 cents goes their
        As seen above, Hebrews chapter 4 tells          next time you put off becoming a Christian
                                                                                                           addresses and free web site hostings are be-       way. Microsoft doesn’t need any more
us that GRACE has saved us through believing.           because you think you’re not “good enough
                                                                                                           coming more and more uncommon. The pur-            money so I strongly suggest that you use
We did not save ourselves!! It was not the result       yet”. God will chisel away that which He
                                                                                                           pose of a company is to make money, there-         some other search engine such as google.
of many hours spent walking old ladies across           does not like about you;all you have to do is
                                                                                                           fore they want to attract as many people as        They do have sponsored links but they’re
the street, or all those times you told the truth       ask!!
                                                                                                           possible by giving away a service for free.        placed far away from the results list and are
when you didn’t want to; it was GRACE.                           If anyone wants to know more about
                                                                                                           When everyone is happy with the service,           in coloured boxes that are easily distinguish-
        So how can you get your hands on some           Grace, or if you have other questions I can
                                                                                                           they begin to charge for it and they make a        able from the real content.
of this Grace thing? Through accepting that Je-         answer for you, please feel free to email me.
sus paid a price that you could never pay. You                                                             large profit. Will we eventually have to
                                                        righteous_insanity@hotmail.com
could never be a perfect sacrifice for everyone’s




                                                              Clydes AD




      8                                                                                                                                                               Bandersnatch
                                                 Arts                                                  with editor Jonathan Venne


Kicking              Cacophony January
Reason in the Balls!             Air                    I can only hope that I've at least shaken
Jonathan Venne                                   some of the foundations most of you have,
Arts Editor                                      or at least that I've gotten you curious. Next     Starshine
                                                 time you question something, ridicule your-        Staff Writer
                                                 self.
           Most of us wander through life
rationalizing every single event that            Some Surrealist Games:                                                         Poet Knight
occurs around us. We seek meaning                                                                                               Contributor
                                                 Word Salad!
behind everything. That kind of thinking
                                                 1 to X player game
can really poison you. We've all had
                                                 1.Take a newspaper (like this one), cut out
breakups where you try to explain what
                                                 all the words of a page (anyone you like).         Lying here alone
exactly went wrong at what point or even
                                                 2. Put the words into a hat.
                                                                                                                                It’s far too cold to go out tonight
what was wrong with us that lead to
                                                 3. Pick out words at random and glue them
                                                                                                    Surrounded by all           A cool breeze chills the January air
seemingly fatal rejection. What good did
all that thinking do? Not much, you just
                                                 onto another page. Keep doing this until           This noise                  So let us remain inside
                                                 satisfied.                                                                     Within the air warmed by the TV’s
drove yourself nuts. I'm not saying
                                                 4. Read what you made.
                                                                                                    Electric buzz
thinking is wrong or that being rational is                                                                                     glow
unhealthy. What I'm trying to say is that
                                                 ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○        The light is on             But why watch the news
those things aren't praramount. Look at          Fumage                                             Another sound               Or that sad drama show
the world around you. We live in a               1 Player
                                                                                                    Perceived                   Laugh at bad jokes or even
machine that isn't made to produce
                                                 1. Light a candle until it smokes.                                             See who wins that cash
beautiful individuals, but consumer-
robots. You're born, you go to school, you
                                                 2. Place a piece of paper over the candle and      Another sound               Why care for acting
                                                 let thesmoke draw an image on the paper.
get a job by this point you're very                                                                 Cacophony                   Or what happens elsewhere
unhappy because you never had a chance           ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○
                                                                                                                                While we are protected from the cool
to grow but you can't stop the cycle. You        Definitions
                                                                                                                                breeze
have to work if you want to eat. You work
                                                  2 Players                                         Lying in silence            That chills January Air
to eat and to make money to buy sh*t so
you can forget you're not happy. What do          1. Player one writes a word on a piece of         Surrounded by the           The news talks about bloodshed
you do at your job? you probably sell            paper and folds it as to hide the word from
                                                                                                    Discord                     abroad
useless shit to people who are just as           player two.                                                                    The dramas are stories of jealousy
unhappy as you are or you support
                                                  2. Player two writes any sentence that            Metallic clang              The jokes single out ethnic groups
people who do that. It's a brilliant self-
sustaining machine. This is the world for
                                                 comes to mind.                                     The radio's on              The poor guy just lost a million bucks
which order, logic and reason werebuilt.         ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○
                                                                                                    Another sound               So why watch the shows
As a side note, I'm not an extremist in that     Insomnia                                                                       That makes us sad
I hate these things as a whole. I hate them                                                         Perceived                   So why should our smiles
because guns are everywhere prematurely
killing people I haven't had the chance to
                                                 1 Player                                           Another sound               Be turned to frowns
meet. I don't hate them because I have                                                              Cacophony                   Our tears of joy
                                                 1. Stay awake for as long as
DVD's at home, that I can watch at my            humanly possible. Then write or
                                                                                                                                Can’t be forced into fears
leisure.                                         draw.                                                                          While we are protected from the cool
                                                                                                    Ears strike                 breeze
       This is sounding political, I know, but   2. Sleep, wake up and enjoy the
                                                                                                    Constant ringing            That chills January Air
trust me, this belongs in the arts section.
                                                 fruits of your self-inflicted insomnia.                                        Lets turn off the rest of life
I'm going to tell you about a movement that
focuses entierely on the ridicule and the op-
                                                                                                    Electric buzz               And put on the warming music
position of the destruction brought on by        ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○
                                                                                                    Metallic clang              Let’s turn up the volume a little bit
so called "rationalism". Surrealism was born                                                                                    Please take my hand and dance with
out of Dadaism which itself was a sort of                                                           Another sound
                                                 Automatic Writing                                                              me
anti-art that defied rational, normal think-                                                        Perceived                   Let me taste your mouth
ing. The horrors of World War I disgusted
                                                 1 player game
surrealists who blamed "rationalism" for                                                            Another sound               Let me hear your heart
guiding all of Europe into violence and war
                                                 1. This one of the most direct games.              Cacophony                   Feel the warmth of your breast
unlike any other in history.                                                                                                    Upon my naked chest
                                                 Simply take a piece of paper and write non-
                                                 stop. Don't worry about syntax or punctua-                                     Permit me to hold you
       Borrowing a lot of Freud's concepts,
Surrealists believe that the unconscious
                                                 tion just write whatever comes to mind             Another sound               Put my hand through your hair
                                                 don't let yourself control what you write.                                     While we are protected from the cool
mind is the womb by which all imagination                                                           Perceived
and creativity stems from. One of the goals                                                                                     breeze
is to access this subconscious and bring it
                                                 ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○ ○
                                                                                                    Cacophony                   That chills January Air
out to the conscious.
                                                                                                    Ringing clear

                       October 9th, 2002                                                                                                                         9
 McCormack                                                                                                                                          Potential
                                                                                                                                                    Kathleen Stanhope
 Hits Ste-Anne-de-Bellevue                                                                                                                          Archive Editor

                                                                                                   plague-ridden shiploads of exotic animals, a
Marc Nakhleh                                                                                       town populated by one-legged Scotsmen,           The sky darkens as the
                                                  ing man with a friendly demeanor. The fans       and more.                                        clouds thicken.
Contributor
                                                  were treated to a down-to-earth gentleman                                                         Even the might oak tree
                                                  who fielded questions and seemed happy                  The idea for the book signing took        bends its branches to the
                                                  with the whole event, as were                                     form when a Penguin sales       wind.
      October 1st saw the arrival of Scot-
                                                  his devotees. Fiction Book-                                       representative who is an        You stand in awe of the
tish-born author Eric McCormack to the
                                                  store certainly welcomed the                                      admirer          of     Mr.     storm.
town of Ste-Anne-de-Bellevue to conduct
                                                  publicity.                                                        McCormack’s work spoke          Its might is immense and
a signing for his most recent novel.
                                                                                                                    to the publicist responsible    absolute.
                                                         Eric McCormack’s new-                                      for looking after authors       The wind whips the grass
       Professor McCormack, now teaching
                                                  est novel, The Dutch Wife is                                      visiting Montreal. He told      and scatters the
English at St. Jerome’s College in Waterloo
                                                  the story of a Canadian author                                    the publicist about Fiction,    unprotected dirt.
Ontario, was on hand at Fiction Bookstore
                                                  who is struggling to complete                                     a new bookstore in St-          The clouds move, faster,
to sign copies of his latest novel, The Dutch
                                                  a book titled The Kilted                                          Anne-de-Bellevue, where         faster, ever faster.
Wife. It is his fifth publication. It was a
                                                  Cowpoke (a Western about                                          he could pass for a book        A funnel is forming,
small event, attracting 15 or so aficionados
                                                  Scottish ranchers who battle                                      signing. The suddenness         swirling, spinning.
willing to take a bite out of their schedule at
                                                  Apaches and feud among                                            of the invitation might ex-     Its power is undeniable.
11:00AM to meet with McCormack. His past
                                                  themselves). He makes the ac-                                     plain the small turnout for     It’s hard to believe that
novels, including Inspecting the Vault and
                                                  quaintance of his new neigh-                                      the signing. Nevertheless,      such a force of destruction
the most originally-titled First Blast of the
                                                  bour, a lonely Renaissance                                        the event was hailed as a       even exists.
Trumpet against the Monstrous Regiment
                                                  historian named Thomas                                            success by Fiction Book-        It’s harder to believe that
of Women, have garnered many awards,
                                                  Vanderlinden. Thomas is soon                                      store and all sides hailed it   you are the one controlling
most notably a nomination for the Gover-
                                                  hospitalized with a life-threat-                                  as a success. The book          it.
nor General’s Award for Fiction.
                                                  ening illness, and the narrator becomes cap-     store gained much publicity, Eric McCormack      They said you were special,
                                                  tivated by what he discovers of his friend’s     met some of his Montreal followers and those     but who knew you could do
      McCormack’s fans on hand were not
                                                  family history: a story that involves husband-   same fans were treated to a good time.           this.
disappointed. According to Pola Hallquist,
                                                  swapping, adventures in Peru and the South
Fiction’s store manager, he is a very charm-
                                                  Pacific, true love lost to the jaws of death,




                                     Adam Stanhope
                                     Contributor

    10                                                                                                                                                  Bandersnatch
             Games Page




October 9th, 2002         11
Theory or Practice? Alabama Love Story            Connolly’s two primary musical influences:                                                     she is also dating one of the city’s most
Kathleen Stanhope                                                                                  Meera Harper                                  desirable bachelors, Andrew (Patrick
                                                  the classic-rock of legends such as Led Zep-
Archive Editor                                    pelin and the Doors and the “Seattle sound”      Contributor                                   Dempsey). Not only is he the mirror im-
                                                  pioneered by artists such as Nirvana and                                                       age of the perfect man, he proposes to his
       For Tyler Connolly, Dave Brenner,          Pearl Jam. “We just try to play the most ag-                                                   Alabama princess in sheer romantic style.
                                                                                                          Let’s set the mood for my premier
Dean Back, and Tim Hart, with a band like         gressive music we can, but at the same time,                                                   Then comes the twist. Carmichael imme-
                                                                                                   viewing of “Sweet Home Alabama”. First
Nickelback in their corner, odds are they’ll      we try to be melodic and come across to as                                                     diately returns to her place of birth, Sweet
                                                                                                   of all, I’m downtown at the A.M.C. sur-
be pretty successful as a band. Those of          many people as possible,” Connolly said.                                                       Home Alabama, to attempt to divorce her
                                                                                                   rounded by a surplus of
you out there who don’t like Nickelback,          “We want to appeal to 16-year-old girls as                                                                        high school sweetheart,
                                                                                                   Dawson debutantes.
Creed, or Default (another Vancouver band         well as 35-year-old guys.”                                                                                        Jake (Josh Lucas). All
                                                                                                   Estrogen fills the air as
Chad Kroeger is credited with discovering),              The 26-year-old Connolly realizes the                                                                      she needs to get Jake to
                                                                                                   the doors open. Once
chances are you won’t like Theory of a            role that luck has played in the band’s suc-                                                                      do is sign on the dotted
                                                                                                   inside, a host informs
Deadman. That’s not to say that you will          cess. Back in 1999, as Nickelback was fast                                                                        line, which, of course,
                                                                                                   the audience of prizes
not like them, their album does have a ‘pa-       becoming one of Canada’s most popular                                                                             Jake refuses to do.
                                                                                                   that may in fact be hid-
rental advisory explicit content’ warning on      bands, he just happened to show up at a                                                                                    This is a classic
                                                                                                   den under our seats.
the cover, but I would definitely put the         party in his native Vancouver that was also                                                                       story of a young woman
                                                                                                   Big mistake. What fol-
sound and style of their music in the same        attended by Kroeger. A mutual friend intro-                                                                       seeking her place in an
                                                                                                   lows? A crazed herd of
box as Nickelback, Creed, and Default.            duced the two. “Chad’s probably heard it a                                                                        ever growing society.
                                                                                                   mad, obsessive teenag-
       Now according to the artist biography      billion times—’Oh yeah, my friend’s in a                                                                          She’s torn between two
                                                                                                   ers scrambling around
press release (from which I will be getting       band,”’ Connolly says. “I’m sure he rolled                                                                        worlds: one being the
                                                                                                   the theatre, jumping
most of my info about the band), Theory of        his eyes and he went, ‘Yeah, yeah’. But he                                                                        simplistic country life
                                                                                                   over seats, and for
a Deadman singer/guitarist Tyler Connolly         listened to our demo and said he really liked                                                                     and the other being,
                                                                                                   what? Are you ready for
realizes that things are going pretty well for    it.” So it seems quite natural that Theory Of                                                                     well how else can I put
                                                                                                   this? A t-shirt. If that
his band these days. After all, this Vancou-      A Deadman would be the first signing to the                                                                       it, New York. Through
                                                                                                   wasn’t bad enough, the
ver group’s self-titled debut will serve as the   label, 604 Records launched by Kroeger and                                                                        drunken masquerades,
                                                                                                   audience, unfortunately
flagship release for 604 Records, the new         his attorney, Jonathan Simkin. “Through their                                                                     small town festivals,
                                                                                                   (let me stress that word) including myself,
imprint/record label co-founded by                production company, they shopped us to                                                         and the sometimes uncomfortable meet-
                                                                                                   got a great view of a young women’s butt
Nickelback frontman Chad Kroeger. In addi-        some major labels,” Connolly says. “Out of                                                     ings with old friends, Carmichael begins
                                                                                                   crack as she struggled to unhinge herself
tion, Connolly contributed guitar work to         all the labels we talked to, the band thought                                                  to realize what she truly needs to be happy.
                                                                                                   from a seat. I was literally praising the
Kroeger’s mega-hit “Hero,” from the plati-        the best one was Roadrunner/Universal, so                                                      With a mix of New York humour, served to
                                                                                                   skies when the curtains finally opened.
num Spider-Man soundtrack, while Theory           we ended up signing with them” (604 has                                                        us by New York’s Mayor (Candice
                                                                                                             Melanie Carmichael (Reese
of a Deadman’s “Invisible Man” served as          since entered into an imprint deal with                                                        Bergen), a hint of sadness (a key ingredi-
                                                                                                   Witherspoon) is a young woman trying to
the b-side to the “Hero” single and is also       Roadrunner/Universal).                                                                         ent to almost every modern flick) and a
                                                                                                   find the perfect life. She’s originally a
included on the Spider-Man soundtrack.                   I think that this is a really promising                                                 wave of romance, we are escorted through
                                                                                                   small town girl, from Alabama, trying to
       The ten songs on Theory Of A               band, provided that they do not get played                                                     “Sweet Home Alabama”.
                                                                                                   live up to almost every female’s prepu-
Deadman showcase a guitar-based, har-             to death on the radio causing everyone who       bescent dream: becoming a fashion de-
mony-rich, post-grunge sound equally rep-         hears them or their name to cringe in over-      signer in one of the hottest cities, New
resentative of singer/guitarist Tyler             play pain.                                       York. Let’s add another piece to the pie -


                                                                                                   around Jason’s soul-searching words.          sel”.
Lively Lifehouse                                                                                          “We had more freedom to experi-
                                                                                                   ment,” says Sergio. “We knew what to
                                                                                                                                                       Obviously, since it is the same
                                                                                                                                                 singer, the voice is the same. But tones
Naila Jinnah                                            The first single of the CD, “Spin”,        expect this time. We understood how the       can vary and that’s not the case when
Ads Manager                                       portrays a newly acquired confidence             process worked. That allowed us to            comparing “No Name Face” to “Stanley
                                                  that only success can                                               take more charge of        Climbfall”. We find the same vocal vari-
                                                  prompt. As with                                                     things and focus on        ations and hear the same types of vi-
      Lifehouse sounds like... Lifehouse          most           bands,                                               how to really make         bratos. As “No Name Face” producer
      After watching their debut album            Lifehouse’s second                                                  this our own.”             Ron Aniello puts it, “We set out to pin-
achieve double-platinum status, the al-           CD is a step beyond                                                       All I can say is     point the individuality of the band. We
ternative/pop group Lifehouse has re-             “No Name Face”.                                                     that they succeeded.       kept it simple so you could hear the
leased their new album entitled “Stanley          This time, more mem-                                                “Stanley Climbfall”        purity and edge that voice and strength
Climbfall”. As with their past album,             bers of the band par-                                               sounds exactly like        of those songs.”
“No Name Face”, the lyrics of all the             ticipated in the crea-                                              “No Name Face”, in               All this writer can say is that
songs are very deep and inspiring.                tion process. Al-                                                   general. Every song,       sometimes, simplicity doesn’t sell well.
They play around with both concrete               though Jason’s crea-                                                taken alone is great.      People love to hear Lifehouse songs,
and abstract ideas, showing the meta-             tive principles remain                                              We see the effect of       because each of them expresses a com-
physical perplexity that Lifehouse fans           a cornerstone of                                                    experience in “Spin”       mon feeling in society. But no one is
have come to love. As Jason Wade, the             Lifehouse’s material,                                               and “Wash”, and the        going to buy a one-track CD. “Stanley
lead singer-guitarist and main song-              this time bassist                                                   distinctive guitar         Climbfall” comes from the principle that
writer puts it: “I’ve come to grips with          Sergio Andrade and drummer Rick                  sounds of “Anchor” are definitely spe-        to get to where you want to be, you
the fact that pretty much every song I            Woolstenhulme were more fully inte-              cial. However, we still find that acous-      stand, climb, fall - and hopefully get
write is going to be inspired by my be-           grated into the overall sound, putting a         tic reverie in “Empty Space” that we          back up again.
liefs.”                                           more robust flesh-and-blood structure            first encountered in “Sick Cycle Carou-

    12                                                                                                                                                   Bandersnatch
1 Hour of Madness Movie Quote Quiz                the hundreds of pictures he keeps, which
Bob Menzies                                       are his most prized possessions. The pic-           Shawn Robertson                                   4.   Teenagers! You give them an
Donny Osmond Stalker                              tures, too, are representative of his life in       Antifloccinaucinihilipilificationist                   inch, they swim all over you.
                                                  that they are flat and lifeless. They are scenes
       Robin Williams’ name is most com-          from other people’s lives, lives of which he                 Well, I was                                           5.      Monkey
monly associated with comedy, as most peo-        wants to be a part, but can’t. Probably the         going to put a movie                                           drinking master’s
ple know. His dramatic acting, while not as       most powerful element in the movie is the           quotes quiz here                                               wine.
well known, is just as impressive, in films       fact that there is almost no comic relief. There    written by the incom-
like “What Dreams may Come” and “Good             is only one intentionally funny line in the         parable Jason Doan                                             6.      Hey you!
Will Hunting”. Those of us who have               movie, and it’s near the beginning. Normally        and his girlfriend                                             Stop kicking that
watched “One Hour Photo” can say that             this would be a bad thing, but it only adds to      Melissa Rawlings.                                              mackerel.
they’ve seen an entirely new side of Robin        the movie, because it reinforces the dry, se-       Unfortunately, fate
Williams: downright creepy.                       rious feel that the film conveys. There are         was against me and                                             7.     Why does she
          “One Hour Photo” is the story of        also symbols inserted throughout the movie:         someone managed to                                             even have that lever?
Sy Parrish, a photo technician at a one hour      a blank photograph lying on the floor, a dream      misplace the disk that
development studio, played by Williams.           of bleeding eyes, a roll of film filled with pic-   it was on. I have                                              8.     Show me what
Having lived a lonely and sad life, he takes      tures of everyday objects. They give a real         therefore taken it                                             you know.
comfort in the photos he develops, learning       air of surrealism to the movie.                     upon myself to create
about the families featured: their names, their              This movie was written and directed      my own quiz for you                                            9.      You’re only in
pastimes, everything. He attaches himself to      by Mark Romanek, who, until recently, made          wonderful people.                                              trouble if you get
the Yorkin family in particular, imagining him-   his living directing music videos for artists       Jay, I apologize in                                            caught.
self within their photos, as part of their fam-   such as Madonna, Michael Jackson, Nine              advance for my poor
ily. The movie really kicks off when Sy dis-      Inch Nails, and David Bowie.                        substitute. Without                                            10.   You didn’t
covers that the Yorkin family, to which he so                Williams’ acting is, as usual, excel-    further ado, Shawn Robertson’s kung                    say no PURPLE dragons.
wants to belong, may not be as perfect as         lent. He’s very calm, quiet and overall unlike      fu/disney movie quotes quiz.
the pictures they take would suggest.             any character he’s ever portrayed. He gives                                                           11. You ain’t the only one with
          The movie depends greatly on at-        an incredible impression of being a sad,                1.   And so he walked through the                 quick hands.
mosphere. Right from the beginning, the           lonely, pitiable old man with a life behind                  wilderness… And sometimes
movie has a very sterile feel: the white walls    him that many would say is not worth living.                 drove.                                   12. Do not think. Feel.
of the photo lab are disinfected and impos-       He even looks completely different. He’s able
sibly clean, like the walls of a mental insti-    to make the viewer forget every movie he’s              2.   Crazy Yanks!                             13. *cat-like screeching sound*
tute. Like his personal life, they are bare and   ever starred in and focus entirely on this one.
very plain. His apartment, too, is representa-    “One Hour Photo” is a great movie.                      3.   Give me back my comb.                    14. Boards don't hit back.
tive of his life: empty and bland, except for



The TV Toilet                                     found. “Friends” is finally ending thank
                                                                                                      course, even if they weren’t there would
                                                                                                      be the fact that many of these shows
                                                                                                      illustrate that many of us seem capable
                                                                                                                                                     Concert
Shawn Robertson                                                                                       of watching anything.
Accident Waiting to Happen
                                                  the stars above. It’s not that I minded it
                                                  at first but really the concept did not
                                                  hold out all that long and the past
                                                                                                                I myself have satellite and I can
                                                                                                      safely say that the majority of the things
                                                                                                      available through this device are things
                                                                                                                                                     Listings
          So I’ve concluded that I no             couple have seasons have been a
longer understand television. I mean, at          garbage dump the likes of which you                 which I will never watch. From obscure
                                                                                                                                                     Shawn Robertson
first I just disliked the majority of shows       won’t see outside of SNL’s last half-               sports events (lumberjack competitions)
                                                                                                      to the seemingly endless procession of
                                                                                                                                                     Copy Monkey
on television but I figured that was              hour. To those of you who didn’t agree
normal in this day and age given the fact         with the last part, that’s cool. It is where        “Trading Spaces” available on so many
                                                                                                      channels. Not that I have anything             Wed 10/09/02
that some many new shows come into                they put all of their lesser sketches
                                                                                                                against the latter but there are     Junior Watson, Cafe Campus
existence each season and                                                                                                                            Fri 10/11/02
most of them are rushed. I                                                                                      only two shows that I have
                                                                                                                found myself capable of watch-       The Tragically Hip, Place des Arts
understood that often writers                                                                                                                        Sat 10/12/02
were forced to compromise                                                                                       ing for hours at a time, the
                                                                                                                “Simpsons” and “Kids in the          Amon Tobin, Club Soda
their ideas or churn out tons of                                                                                                                     Andrew WK, Le Spectrum
new ones all the time. I saw it                                                                                 Hall”. So I spend a lot of time
                                                                                                                watching Scream, Comedy              The Tragically Hip, Place des Arts
happening to the “Simpsons”                                                                                                                          Disrupture, The Zest
in recent years but I learned to                                                                                Network, Action, Showcase,
                                                                                                                Space, and Teletoon. Most of         Mon 10/14/02
accept it since it has been on                                                                                                                       The Mooney Suzuki, Cabaret
forever and most of the best                                                                                    the channels that seem really
                                                                                                                worthwhile you have to pay           Fishbone, Cafe Campus
writers moved to “Futurama,”                                                                                                                         Alexisonfire, Cafe Linco
at least in my opinion.                                                                                         extra for anyway, which leads
                                                                                                                me to believe that the cable         Tue 10/15/02
          I’m still confused as to                                                                                                                   Hot Water Music, Rainbow
how Mike Bullard got a show,                                                                                    company does indeed know
                                                                                                                what people want but they            Wed 10/16/02
much less how he managed to                                                                                                                          Dashboard Confessional, Metropolis
keep it for as long as he has.                                                                                  prefer to make even more
                                                                                                      money off of people. This is perfectly         Thu 10/17/02
The man is an obnoxious blowhard with             though since they want their best stuff
                                                                                                      understandable in and of itself since          Billy Bragg, Club Soda
no redeeming values and yet he gets a             to be out in front to pull people in.
                                                                                                      they are a company and it is their             Fri 10/18/02
choice spot in the Comedy Network’s                        Not to really change the subject
                                                                                                      business to make money. The real               Rush, Bell Centre
line-up while the delicious genius of             here but one trend which I absolutely
                                                                                                      problem comes when they throw the free         Sat 10/19/02
“Dennis Miller Live” is trapped in the            cannot stand is reality tv. Even if it
                                                                                                      crap at us knowing full well that people       Dr. Tom’s Leather, Yellow Door
graveyard shift on Saturdays. This is             weren’t for the fact that most of these
                                                                                                      will come to enjoy it if it’s all they know.   Mon 10/21/02
the sort of thing which I utterly fail to         shows are just lame knock-offs of each
                                                                                                                                                     Cyndi Lauper, Bell Centre
comprehend.                                       other I would still find them to be
                                                                                                                                                     Reel Big Fish, Metropolis
          For God’s sake! “Everybody              atrocious. You see, I have this sneaking
Loves Raymond” is STILL on the air and            suspicion that many of these “reality”
yet “Family Guy” is nowhere to be                 based shows are in fact staged. Of

                        October 9th, 2002                                                                                                                                             13
The Small, Skilled Beast from the East
                                                  the first face-off this year. Saku will be enter-   full season of playing. Richard Zednik also      of him, he wouldn’t have to be invincible
                                                  ing his eighth season, and while he has yet         enjoyed a minor breakout season, emerging        every night. Markov, Brisebois and Dykhuis
Erik Leijon                                                                                           as a pesky scoring forward with size, some-
                                                  to have the career year that pundits expected                                                        will give up the puck... often. Andrei and
Staff Writer                                      him to have by now, he is our cog on of-            thing the team desperately needs. We as-         Patrice have to make the powerplay work in
                                                  fence. With him in the lineup, we can roll out      sume he is only going to improve, but Rich-      order to get their ice time. Rookie Ron
       Despite my admiration and thorough         two able scoring lines: Audette-Koivu-              ard has shown signs of greatness in the past,    Hainsey may also see some point work on
enjoyment of the CFL season, the NFL sea-         Czerkawski and Zednik-Gilmour-Petrov/               only to wrap it around bouts of inconsistent     the PP, but other than that don’t expect him
son, the baseball post-season and the Ryder       Perreault. His creativity with the puck should      play. Either way, he will be counted on to       to play twenty minutes a night. Craig Rivet
Cup, there really is no comparison when it        dramatically help our anaemic offence; as           provide offence and to play physical hockey.     was rewarded a gargantuan contract exten-
comes to the dropping of the puck and the         well as our powerplay, which was in the bot-        The rest of the team’s offensive forwards all    sion, but other than last year he’s seen the
beginning of the NHL season. Seeing the           tom half of the league, and even worse than         came out of the same box. Small, skilled, fee-   sick ward more than Angelina Jolie’s adopted
newly resigned Ron MacLean and Don                two years ago. Plus, a team needs its captain       ble and prime gamey flesh for big                baby. With Robidas and Bouillon gone, a
Cherry after the summer hiatus is like being      on the ice, even if the team is made mostly of      defenceman these players are. Petrov,            Rivet injury could be devastating, seeing as
reunited with an old friend. Seeing the newly     veterans. All of this hinges on the health of       Audette, Czerkawski and Perreault can score,     we still have Traverse on the bench.
umm... designed Pat Quinn lambasting the          Saku, who unfortunately prior to last year's        but none of them will be able to work their             Everything went perfect last season
referees again will remind me of all that was     experience, was having a terrible time stay-        quick hands if Hal Gill is beating them in the   in order for us to make the playoffs and to
missing during those long summer months.          ing out of Dr. David Mulder’s office. His           corner. That’s what Randy McKay, Chad            eliminate the Bruins. The habs are an im-
Most importantly though, I get to see 20 play-    knees have to stay together, and unfortu-           Kilger and Bill Lindsay are for. These trench    proved team this year, but everything has to
ers blazing down the ice, the CH stitched on      nately, they never have before.                     men must be willing to fight for the puck in     go right again for us to have success. To-
their sweaters.                                          The team doesn’t stop at Saku,               hockey no-man’s-land (the corners) and take      ronto, Boston, Ottawa, Long Island and New
       After last season’s shocking playoff       though, as this team made the playoffs with-        the beatings that Donald and Mariuz can’t.       Jersey are all worse this year, so that is defi-
run, nos Glorieux will be hard pressed to equal   out him in the lineup. Doug Gilmour reneged         We know that McKay and Lindsay will work         nitely a good start.
their alarming amount of success from a sea-      on his retirement plans and played as if he         hard, but Kilger has been an enigma since               I’m out.
son ago. If anything, they will be more con-      wasn’t a 39-year old for the second half of         being a first round draft choice by Anaheim.
fident this October 9th as opposed to last.       the season. He is old though and his days of               It goes without saying that Jose is
This year, captain Saku Koivu will be taking      offence production could slow down after a          great, but if he had a great defence in front




Bandersnatch NHL pool                                                                                                                                           Defenseman            Team
                                                           Centre               Team                           Winger               Team                     ___Niklas Lidstrom       Detroit
                                                        ___Joe Sakic             Colorado                   ___Bill Guerin          Dallas                   ___Rob Blake             Colorado
Nick Mumme
                                                        ___Peter Forsberg        Colorado                   ___Keith Tkachuk        St. Louis                ___Scott Niedermayer     New Jersey
Hockey Pool Organiser                                   ___Mike Modano          Dallas                      ___Mark Recchi          Philadelphia             ___Sandis Ozolinsh       Florida
                                                        ___Mario Lemieux         Pittsburgh                 ___Daniel Alfredsson    Ottawa                   ___Chris Pronger         St. Louis
       The Bandersnatch NHL hockey pool                 ___Eric Lindros         New York                    ___Ziggy Palffy         L.A.                     ___Sergei Gonchar         Washington
will count for the regular season only. It is           ___Mats Sundin          Toronto                     ___Brendan Shanahan     Detroit                  ___Brian Leetch          New York
free to enter. No money or prizes are awarded,          ___Alexei Yashin        New York                    ___Todd Bertuzzi         Vancouver
just the chance to have the pride of being                                                                                                                      Defenseman      Team
the #1 hockey mind at Abbott. The top 25                   Centre               Team                           Winger               Team                     ___Al MacInnis     St. Louis
leaders of the pool will be posted in each              ___Jason Allison        L.A.                        ___John LeClair         Philadelphia             ___Eric Desjardins Philadelphia
issue of Bandersnatch.                                  ___Doug Weight          ST. Louis                   ___Tony Amonte          Phoenix                  ___Bryan McCabe    Toronto
       Rules: The entry form is due at the              ___Sergei Federov       Detroit                     ___Pavol Demitra        St. Louis                ___Brian Rafalski  New Jersey
Bandersnatch office (H-041) by Wednesday,               ___Jeremy Roenick       Philadelphia                ___Petr Sykora          Anaheim                  ___Teppo Numminen Phoenix
October the 16th. A person may enter a maxi-            ___Joe Thorton           Boston                     ___Owen Nolan           San Jose                 ___Sergei Zubov    Dallas
mum of 2 entry forms. After a person has
handed in his entry form, he may not change
                                                        ___Ron Francis
                                                        ___Adam Oates
                                                                                Carolina
                                                                                Anaheim
                                                                                                            ___Martin Straka
                                                                                                            ___Glen Murray
                                                                                                                                    Pittsburgh
                                                                                                                                    Boston
                                                                                                                                                       Ed's Note
                                                                                                                                                             ___Ed Jovonoski    Vancouver

his picks. Pick one player from each group                                                                                                                      Defenseman            Team
by marking an X next to his name. Pick one                  Centre                  Team                       Winger             Team                       ___Roman Hamrlik         New York
player from each group.                                 ___Pierre Turgeon           Dallas                  ___Peter Bondra       Washington                 ___Derek Morris          Colorado
       Points: The point system in this pool            ___Saku Koivu               Montreal                ___Simon Gagne        Philadelphia               ___Janne Niinimaa        Edmonton
is simple. For players, one point is awarded            ___Joe Nieuwendyk           New Jersey              ___Mariusz Czerkawski Montreal                   ___Wade Redden           Ottawa
for each goal or assist. For goaltenders, two           ___Radek Bonk               Ottawa                  ___Milan Hejduk       Colorado                   ___Adam Foote            Colorado
points are awarded for a win, while one point           ___Alexei Zhamnov           Chicago                 ___Dany Heatly         Atlanta                   ___Oleg Tverdosky        New Jersey
is awarded for a tie. The person with the               ___Craig Conroy             Calgary                 ___Alexander Mogilny Toronto                     ___Boris Mironov         Chicago
highest sum of points will win the pool.                ___Vincent Damphousse       San Jose                ___Temmu Selanne       San Jose
       Good luck, and have fun!                                                                                                                                 Goaltender             Team
                                                           Winger               Team                           Winger               Team                     ___Patrick Roy            Colorado
        Please fill out this form in block let-         ___Pavel Bure           NewYork                     ___Sergei Samsonov      Boston                   ___Marty Turco            Dallas
ters:                                                   ___Jarome Iginla        Calgary                     ___Marian Hossa         Ottawa                   ___Curtis Joseph          Detroit
        Last name:________________                      ___Patrik Elias         New Jersey                  ___Chris Drury          Calgary                  ___Jose Theodore          Montreal
        First name:________________                     ___Jaromir Jager        Washington                  ___Brett Hull           Detroit                  ___Martin Brodeur         New Jersey
        Phone number:_____________                      ___Alexei Kovalev       Pittsburgh                  ___Ilya Kovalchuk       Atlanta                  ___Roman Cechmanek        Philadelphia
        E-mail address:_____________                    ___Paul Kariya          Anaheim                     ___Theo Fleury          Chicago                  ___Evgeni Nabokov          San Jose
        Pool nick name:_____________                    ___Markus Naslund       Vancouver                   ___Ryan Smyth           Edmonton                 ___Ed Belfour              Toronto

   14                                                                                                                                                        Bandersnatch
        MEN’SRUGBYUNBEATEN                                                                                                                                         and a touchdown.
        The John Abbott rugby team pushed
their record to 4-0 following a 28-13 win over
previously unbeaten Dawson College on Sun-
                                                                             Scoreboard                                                                            WIN
                                                                                                                                                                          ISLANDER TENNIS START WITH A

                                                                                                                                                                          The tennis Islanders came out victori-
day.                                                                                                                                                               ous in the first match of the season winning 5-2
        Simon Drolet scored 2 tries and Julien       recorded the shutout.                                           The Islander basketball opened their 2002-    against Dawson. It was a promising start for a
Ireson-Valois and Mark Englehardt added one                  FLAG FOOTBALL SWEEPS 3                          03 season with a pair of exhibition wins over AA      team filled with talented rookies and experienced
each. Matt Degraff was good on all four con-                 The flag football team had a big week last      teams. On Friday they hammered Trois-Rivieres         veterans. The victory marks the 40th consecu-
versions.                                            week winning all 3 games. The ladies remain un-         100-62. Joey Ranjitsingh led the way with 20 points   tive match the Islanders have won over the last
        FOOTBALL WINS IN RIMOUSKI                    defeated (6-0) with wins over Maisonneuve (20-          and Simon Salois chipped in 14 points and Jason       5 years.
        The Islander football team (4-1) overcame    12), Montmorency (45-6), and 2001 champs St.            Ratchelous and Nigel Peters each had 13.                     The Islanders came through with a 11-4
a tough bus drive to shutout Rimouski 47-0 on        Jean (38-22). Against Maisonneuve, QB Gen                       On Sunday afternoon the Isles defeated        win in sets. The top 2 male singles players, J-F
Sunday before 2800 fans. The Isles led 26-0 af-      Sauve completed 14 of 16 passes for 202 yards, 2        Heritage College 124-69. Ratchelous had a career      Talbot and Gabi Batz crushed their opponents
ter the first quarter and 40-0 at half time before   TD’s and 2 interceptions. Kim Fletcher had 2 TD’s       high 27 points and Jason Cheevers had 13.             with an identical score of 6-0,6-1. The top female
Chris Adeyefa returned the second half kickoff       including a sensational diving catch in the end                 WOMEN’S BASKETBALL WINS                       singles player, Sylvie Von Werder, fought hard,
92 yards for a touchdown. It was Adeyefa’s           zone at the end of the first half.                              On Friday night the Lady Islanders ran        but lost her match 5-7,7-6,2-6. In #2 singles for
third TD of the game and his 9th of the year. He             Running back Marie-Noel Neauloeu con-           their early season record to 2-0 following a 68-63    women, Jessica Bichai lost a tough match 6-2,6-
only carried the ball 7 times for 126 yards.         nected with Alex Marcotte for the other Islander        win over league rival Trois-Rivieres. The Lady        3.
        Overall the Isles had 282 yards on the       major. Marcotte had 4 catches for 73 yards and a        Isles led 35-34 at halftime.                                 In doubles action, the team of captain
ground and 193 in the air. They used 4               2-point convert. Fletcher had a great game with 7               Maria Jaworski led the way with 10 points     Rob D’Amico and Marc Cordahi won their
quarterbacks in the game. Scott Syvret com-          catches for 113 yards.                                  and Christine Ford and Catherine Parent had 9         match 6-1,6-2 while the #2 team of Sasha Zaib
pleted 3 of 6 passes for 70 yards and a touch-               Defense played well holding a tough             each.                                                 and John Franquet won their match in 3 sets 6-
down (J.F. Richer-Desjardins), Mike McNair was       Maisonneuve offense. They were driving at the                   MEN’SVOLLEYBALLINLEAGUEPLAY                   2,4-6,6-2. In women’s doubles, the team of cap-
good on 3 of 6 passes for 68 yards and a touch-      end of the fourth quarter but the girls held on.                Men’s volleyball team finished their first    tain Sara de Bruijn and Katherine Marchut won
down (Sam Philibert), Andrij “Jerry” Ferguson        Beaulieu had 7 flags, Amanda Davidson had 4             league tournament with a 2-2 record in St. Jerome.    their match 7-5 and 6-2.
was 4 of 9 for 38 yards and 1 interception and       flags, 1 knockdown, and 1 interception, Bettyna         They started with victories over Lionel-Groulx               WOMEN’S SOCCER UNBEATEN
Tim Mironowicz completed 2 of 5 passes for 17        Marcel had 5 flags and 2 knockdowns, and Sauve          (25-12, 25-13) and Champlain St. Lambert (25-22,             The Lady Islander soccer team, remained
yards.                                               had 8 flags, 2 knockdowns and 2 interceptions           15-25, 15-13), and then lost to league power-         unbeaten and ranked number 2 in Canada, fol-
        Newcomer Gabe Gozlan led the Islander        both in the end zone. Rusher Alicia Suchorski           houses St. Jean (23-25, 19-25) and Maisonneuve        lowing a key 2-0 win over Dawson (#14 in
defense with 8 tackles and 2 sacks and a forced      had a great game with 4 QB sacks.                       (18-25, 23-25).                                       Canada) on the road on Sunday. Maia Lawson
fumble, and Tom Kuchiran, who leads the league               In the first of 2 home games on Saturday,               Outstanding contributions came from 1st       and Laura Giove scored the goals while Melissa
in tackles, had 5.5. Dave Timmons had an inter-      the Islanders handed Montmorency a football             year middle blocker William Healy with 12 kills,      Morgan played well in the Lady Islander net.
ception and 4.5 tackles.                             lesson beating them 45-6. Sauve completed 18 of         and 7 stuff blocks and captain Sandy Thomson                 ISLANDER SOCCER FIT TO BE TIED
        GOLF TEAM FINISHES SECOND                    22 passes for 208 yards, 4 TD’s, 5 converts, and 3      with 23 kills, 2 aces and 6 digs.                            The Islander soccer team traveled to Que-
        The Islander golf team struggled on Sun-     interceptions. She also rushed for an Islander                  WOMEN’SHOCKEY                                 bec City on Saturday where they played F.X.
day in Granby and came home with silver med-         TD. Sauve hit Suchorski, Fletcher (2), and                      The Lady Islanders dropped a 4-3 deci-        Garneau to a scoreless draw. The Isles are now
als. Heading into the final round they had a 3       Marcotte for TD’s. MarieAndree Cloutier, Fletcher,      sion to St Mary’s University on Sunday at             2-1-1 and are tied for first place.
shot lead but St-Lawrence from Quebec City           and Marcotte all scored conversions as well.            Concordia University. Mary Maglieri scored 2                 Rookie Keeper Paul Bajsarowicz played
had a huge day and won by 16 strokes. Benoit                 Erin Wiltshire had 5 catches for 50 yards.      goals and Amanda McKay added 1.                       very well in recording his first shutout of the
Gordon from Edouard-Montpetit shot 66 to win         Defensively the Isles were near perfect. Jen                    On Friday they lost 3-2 to St-Laurent in a    season.
the tournament and St-Lawrence had the next 4        Robinson had 5 flags and 2 knockdowns,                  league game.                                                 WOMEN’SRUGBYUNBEA               TEN
players with a combined 2 under par.                 Davidson had 3 flags and 2 knockdowns, and                      GOLF TEAM SURGES TO THE FRONT                        The Lady Islanders pushed their league
        Mitchell Vaughan was the best Islander       Sauve had 1 interception. Lauren Burns had 4                    The Islander golf team had a very strong      record to 2-0 following a 48-0 win over St-Lam-
with a 75, Jerome Cavanagh and Patrick Chabot        flags including one for a running back loss, 1          showing in Sorel on Sunday and have moved             bert on Sunday. Marie-Dardel, Genevieve
both shot 76, Joel Patch was 78, and Justin          knockdown, and 1 interception, which she ran 10         from 4 shots down to 6 shots ahead. They will         Turcott, Emma Stevens, Leah Robbins, Laura
Crowder was 79.                                      yards back for a TD. Marcotte had 2 QB sacks            play their final round this Sunday in Granby.         Belvedere and Jen Jackson all scored trys while
        Gordon won the overall individual title              In a big game on Sunday, the Isles handed               James Weisman fired a 1-under par 71 (34-     Chelsea Privee added 6 conversions.
with a 3 round total of 214 and Cavanagh was         St. Jean their first loss of the season. Sauve com-     37), Joel Patch was 72 (34-38), Mitchell Vaughan             MEN’SRUGBYROLLING
second with 218. Krista Bulow finished third in      pleted 28 of 37 passes for 321 yards, 5 TD’s, 1         72 (35-37), Jerome Cavanagh 74 (36-38), Patrick              The Islander rugby team is still unbeaten
the women’s division.                                convert, and 3 interceptions. Suchorski had 2           Chabot 75 (39-36) and Giovanni Mazzaferro was         after a 83-3 win over St-Lambert at home on
        Both St-Lawrence and John Abbott will        TD’s including 1 she ran 55 yards on a ten-yard         77 (40-37).                                           Sunday. Dean deGraff and flankerAaron Graham
now participate in the 2002 CCAA National            pass. Marcotte, and Allison Yeldon each had a                   ISLANDER FOOTBALL TIED FOR 1ST                each scored 3 tries in the game and were se-
Championships in Oshawa, Ontario starting on         TD, as did Karine Tait who had a big catch in the       PLACE                                                 lected as Players of the Game.
Wednesday.                                           last play of the first half for a TD. Fletcher caught           The John Abbott Islander football team               WOMEN’S HOCKEY WINS OVER
        WOMEN’S SOCCER WINS 3 MORE                   10 passes for 82 yards. Wiltshire had 5 catches         moved into a tie for first place following a 21-18    DAWSON
        The Lady Islanders continued their drive     for 47 yards.                                           win over Andre-Grasset on Saturday. The 3-1 Is-              The Lady Islanders are 2-0 following a 6-
to the national championships with 3 more wins               Defensively the ladies came up big when         landers are now tied with Montmorency and             4 win over Dawson at home on Friday night.
this past week. They are now 7-0 in league play,     it counted. Burns had 4 flags and 1 knockdown;          Andre-Grasset.                                        The game was tied at 1-1 after 2 periods before
ranked number 2 in Canada and have outscored         Sauve had 2 flags, 1 knockdown and 1 intercep-                  Led by the strong play of linebacker Tom      the offensive outburst in the third period.
their opponents 31-0 in 7 league games. On           tion, which she ran back 65 yards for a TD.             Kuchiran (10 tackles) and Aalim Payne (6.5 tack-             Vanessa Davidson and Mary Maglieri
Wednesday they blanked Dawson 3-0 at the             Marcotte scored another sack.                           les and a fumble recovery), the Islanders defense     each scored 2 goals while singles went to
new Catalgona Soccer Plex in Lachine, site of                WOMEN’SRUGBYUNBEATEN                            played very well. The score was 7-0 for the Isles     Tawnya Danis and Christina Smith.
the CCAA National Championships, Novem-                      The women’s rugby team played Dawson            after 1 quarter, 7-6 at half time and 21-18 after 3          WOMEN’S BASKETBALL WINS
ber 6-9. Sarah Chan, Catherine Scott and Laura       on Sunday to determine who would be the last            quarters. Louis-Pierre Clement and Steve Holness      OPENER
Giove all scored goals.                              undefeated team in the league. Abbott drew first        each had interceptions.                                      The Lady Islander basketball team, un-
        On Saturday they beat St-Lambert 4-0 as      blood early in the game on a try by Melissa                     Running back Chris Adeyefa had a big          der the direction of new Head Coach Robert
Jen Scanzano, Maia Lawson, Corey Faubert and         Hairabedian. Dawson responded with a try                day with 27 carries for 148 yards. The Islanders      Ferguson, won their opening game of the sea-
Chelsea Baylis scored the goals. Scanzano had        shortly after. Hairabedian scored another try           had a balanced attack with 156 yards on the           son, 59-51 over Grant MacEwan College from
2 goals and Stephanie Chacon and Lawson each         around the 20-minute mark, but the Blues came           ground and 160 in the air. Quarterback Scott Syvret   Edmonton, Alberta. After falling behind 11-2 in
had 1 in a 4-0 win over Dawson at home on            back again to tie the game 10-10 at the half.           was good on 8 of 15 passes for 160 and 2 touch-       the early going the Lady Isles led 27-24 at half
Sunday.                                                      The second half was, again, a tightly           downs and he also scored on a 1-yard keeper.          time.
        MEN’SSOCCERBEATSST-LAMBERT                   fought battle, but Hairabedian managed to put           The Islanders did not have any turnovers.                    No one scored in double figures but
        The men’s soccer team is now 3-1-1 after     two more in, with Chelsea Priv_e converting one.                Slotback Sam Philibert had 3 catches for      Shannah Ernest and Catherine Parent each had
a 1-0 win over St-Lambert on Saturday. Nick          The final score would be: Abbott 22, Dawson 10.         82 yards and a touchdown and a 2-point conver-        8 points and Eleanor Tweddell and Marie-Eve
Hainault scored the only goal and Marco Maiolo               MEN’S BASKETBALL WINS 2                         sion and Darren Costello 2 catches for 63 yards       Poliquin added 7 each.



                         October 9th, 2002                                                                                                                                                                    15

				
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