10 Tips for Single Parents By Barry G. Ginsberg, Ph.D. & Darrin M. Hoffman 1. New Paradigm – Let go of the old model It doesn’t matter where you came from you are here now. Forget about the past, make the best about the present. 2. Don’t blame things on the divorce, this is just the way life is now. 3. It is our job to bear the burden of divorce, not our children’s 4. Define your role. You are in a new space now. How often are you with the children? Who else cares for them? (other parent, daycare, relatives) What are your strengths, what do you do best? Be open to change, new ideas. 5. Be clear about your expectations: for your children, the other parent, school, daycare, yourself, relatives, etc. Be very clear & specific. (dates, times) Don’t take on unjustified guilt or passive blame. No one is there to pick up the slack. 6. Be responsible. Do what you say you will Children are already programmed for disappointment. 7. Be real – Don’t put on a show for anyone! Avoid trying to be a “Disneyland Dad” or “Super-Mom.” 8. Embrace change, it brings new opportunities. 9. Even though you have limited time, allow for spontaneity. Foster creative, spontaneous interactions. Don’t plan them, let them happen – Be ready when they do. This is not a dress rehearsal. 10. Celebrate the positives. Develop rituals and traditions. Remember your importance to each other.
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