Dealing With Difficult People… Dealing With by ubs20614

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									     End Stage Renal Care
         Welcome t
         W l      to
 Dealing                People…
“Dealing With Difficult People…”

                    Today’s Presenter:
                    Robert J. Mallon
                 Today’s
        Tips for Today s Session:
1.                                   Action…
1 Be Open to Change and Committed to Action
               Today’s
      Tips for Today s Session:
2.
2 Process information as if you are adding
       “Tools in your Tool Belt.”
                  Conflict:

A state of opposition between individuals usually
  concerning ideas, interests, or opinions.
DICHOTOMOUS THINKING
 Fundamental Attribution Error:
People tend to falsely attribute the negative
     behaviors of others to their character,
     (predisposed to being bad) while they
attribute their own negative behaviors to their
                  environment.
                  environment
          (It’s the situation’s fault.)
  THOUGHTS → FEELINGS → BEHAVIORS

                   computers         don t
Our minds are like computers. If you don’t like
  your outcomes, you must reprogram with new
                           beliefs.
              thoughts and beliefs
E+R=O
      E+R=O
Events + Response = Outcome
SPEAKER LISTENER
SPEAKER-LISTENER TECHNIQUE
                p
 Rules for the Speaker:
 • Speak for yourself
 • Keep statements brief
 • Stop to let the listener paraphrase
 Rules for the Listener:
   Paraphrase what you h
 • P     h       h t    hear
 • Focus on the speaker’s message
   Don t rebut…
 • Don’t rebut
 Rules for Both:
 • Share the floor.
                 NO
                “NO” PEOPLE
• Let them voice their concerns in private
• Clarify to reduce generalizations (Pin them
  down specifically)
• Project the positive side
              COMPLAINERS
             “COMPLAINERS”
                            concerns.
• Listen carefully to their concerns
• Keep the monkey on them
  Direct ff t t         l ti together
• Di t efforts to a solution t    th
                     TANKS
                    “TANKS”

1. Command their respect
  •   Be Competent
  •   Hold Eye Contact
                     TANKS
                    “TANKS”

2. Control your emotions
  •   Keep Breathing
  •   Relax your jaw, neck, & hands
  •   Repeat a coping statement
      R            i
                  SNIPERS
                 “SNIPERS”
                                       intent…
• Ask clarifying questions about their intent
• Stand your ground
             KNOW IT ALLS
            “KNOW-IT-ALLS”
• Know your stuff
• Backtrack with respect
  Direct i t       t i       t it
• Di t into a mentoring opportunity
                 GRENADES
                “GRENADES”
             explosion,
• During an explosion redirect their focus – get
  their attention
• Focus on their emotions – let them know that
  you care.
                     3.
                     3         1.
                               1    Event
                               2.   Escalation
                               3.   Grenade
                               4.   De escalation
                                    De-escalation
                               5.   Emotional Result



                2.        4.
Arousal
Judgment
J d




           1.                        5.
      THINK THEY KNOW IT ALLS
     “THINK-THEY-KNOW-IT-ALLS”
          specifics.
• Ask for specifics
• Use third-party documentation.
  Reward accuracy.
• R     d
                YES
               “YES” PEOPLE
             honesty.
• Encourage honesty
• Assist them in making realistic commitments.
               MAYBE
              “MAYBE” PEOPLE
   Work           here…
• “Work with me here ”
• Identify specific hidden fears.
  Hold th            t bl
• H ld them accountable.
             NOTHING
            “NOTHING” PEOPLE
                                talking.
• Create a safe environment for talking
• Allow plenty of time.
  Invite th t “
• I it them to “guess.” ”
            THANK YOU!!!
Please feel free to visit Robert at his website:


          www.RMallon.com
Circle of Influence
Circle f C
Ci l of Concern

       C



       I

								
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