RUN-ONS JOKES & RIDDLES

Cub #1: What monster flies his kite in a rainstorm?          1st Cub: My grandmother came to visit for her
Cub #2: Benjamin Frankenstein.                                        vacation.
                                                             2nd Cub: Did you meet her at the airport?
                                                             1st Cub: Goodness no. I've known her all my life!
Cub #1: What’s the purpose of the propeller on a
                                                             1st Cub: What kind of monkey flies?
Cub #2: To keep the pilot cool. If you don’t think so,
                                                             2nd Cub: What?
                                                             1st Cub: A hot-air baboon.
        stop it and watch him sweat!

                                                             Cub #1: How many balls of string would it take to
Instructor:   We all know what a “good landing” is.                  reach the moon?
Student: One that you can walk away from.                    Cub #2: One, if it were long enough!
Instructor:   Do you know what a “great landing” is?
Student: One where you can use the airplane again!
                                                             Cub #1: What do astronauts eat off?
                                                             Cub #2: Flying saucers.
Cessna:  Jones Tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot,
        I am out of fuel.                                    Cub #1: What is an astronaut’s favorite meal?
Tower: Roger, Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best          Cub #2: Launch.
        glide! Do you have the airfield in sight?
Cessna: Uh, tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want
                                                             Cub #1: How do you put an astronaut to sleep?
        to know where the fuel truck is.
                                                             Cub #2: You rock-et.

Cub #1: Where does a bird goes when it loses its tail?       Q:    What bird is always out of breath?
Cub #2: To the retail store.                                 A:    A puffin.

Cub #1: What goes up when the rain comes down?               Q:    Why do Hummingbirds hum?
Cub #2: Umbrellas.
                                                             A:    They've never learned the words!

Cub #1: What is up in the sky but is not a cloud or a        Q:    What is a mosquito's favorite sport?
        plane or a man?                                      A:    Skin-diving.
Cub #2: The sun.
                                                             Q:    What’s smarter than a hummingbird?
1st Cub: (pointing at the sky) is that a jet or a plane up   A:    A spelling bee!
2nd Cub: I don't know, I'm a stranger here myself.
                                                             Q:    Why did it take the elephant so long to get on the
1st Cub: What do you call an alien that rides first class    A:    Because he had to check his trunk!
         on an airplane?
2nd Cub A Passenger!
                                                             Q:    When do ducks fly upside down?
                                                             A:    When they “Quack Up!”
Ike       Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of
                                                             Cub 1: How do you get an astronaut baby to sleep?
Mike      He couldn't afford plane fare.
                                                             Cub 2: You rocket
1st Cub: I'd like to have enough money to buy ten jet        Cub 1: What is an astronaut's favorite key ona computer
         airplanes.                                          keyboard?
2nd Cub: What would you do with ten jets?                    Cub 2: The space bar.
1st Cub: Hey, I don't want the jets, I'd just like to have
the money.                                                   Cub 1: What did the astronaut see on the stove?
                                                             Cub 2: An unidentified frying object!
Cub 1: What do you call an astronauts watch?               Cub #1: What do moon people do when they get
Cub 2: A lunar-tick                                        married?
                                                           Cub #2: They go off on their honey earth.
Cub 1: Where do astronauts keep their sandwiches?
Cub 2: In their launch boxes.                              Cub #1: Why wasn't the Martian upset when he saw a
                                                           bug in his soup?
Cub 1: Why don't astronauts relate well to other people?   Cub #2: Because it was just a fly-in-saucer.
Cub 2: They are not always down-to-earth
                                                           Cub #1: Why did the astronaut give his copilot a
Cub #1: What does Chewbacca use for practical jokes?       sandwich?
Cub #2: A Wookiee cushion.                                 Cub #2: Because it was launch time.

Cub #1: What do you get when you crossR2-D2 with the       Cub #1: What cleans Saturn’s rings in the bathroom?
Invisible Man?                                             Cub #2: Halley’s Comet
Cub #2: R2-C-through.
Cub #1: What goes "MOOZ"?
Cub #2: A spaceship flying backwards.

Cub #1: Which relative visits the astronauts in space?
Cub #2: Auntie Gravity!

Cub #1: Why is an airport like a closet?
Cub #2: It has plenty of hangars.

Cub #1: How do aliens tie up spacemen?
Cub #2: With astro-knots.

Cub #1: Why don't astronauts answer thephone at noon?
Cub #2: Because they're out to launch.

Cub #1: What do they eat at outer-space picnics?
Cub #2: Toasted martian-mallows.

Cub #1: Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped
on chewing gum?
Cub #2: He got stuck in orbit!

Cub #1: Why is space a vacuum?
Cub #2: To clean up all the stardust.

Cub #1: What goes "swish" in outer space?
Cub #2: A shooting star.

Cub #1: What is the brightest fish in the universe?
Cub #2: A starfish.

Cub #1: Why did the astronomer stare at the dreamers?
Cub #2: Because they had stars in their eyes.

Cub #1: What did the Martian say when he landed in the
flower bed?
Cub #2: Take me to your weeder!

Cub #1: What works only when it's fired?
Cub #2: A rocket.

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