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					                                    WRITING TERMS

1. Prewriting: getting your ideas and concrete details down on paper before you
   organize your essay into paragraphs (clustering, outlining).

2. Introduction: the first paragraph in your essay. It catches your reader's interest,
   provides needed background, and sets the tone for your essay. In literature
   essays, the author and title of the text are included. The thesis sentence/s goes in
   this paragraph, often at the end.

3. Thesis: 1-3 sentences with a clear subject and a clear opinion that is debatable.
   The thesis may explain how you came to your opinion; can be supported with
   significant details; and is specific, not too broad.

   The thesis comes somewhere in your introductory paragraph, most often at the
   end. When you write your thesis, make sure it contains your opinion, not a fact.
   If you were to write, "Katella High School's mascot is a knight," that sentence
   would not be a thesis because it is a fact and not an opinion. Below is a sample
   major thesis:

           In A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens, Sidney Carton is transformed by his love for
           Lucie Manette from a non-caring man into a more considerate person.

   In this example, the writer's opinion is that Carton's love for Lucie inspires him to
   change his life. Someone else might disagree with this opinion. In writing the
   essay based on this thesis, you would have to support your opinion by showing
   examples from the novel.

4. Body: the middle paragraphs of your essay that contain supporting examples
   (concrete details) and arguments (commentary) for your thesis sentence/s. A
   short essay has two body paragraphs. However, there is no specific amount of
   body paragraphs required; your purpose determines strategy. Each paragraph in
   the body includes a) a topic sentence, b) integrated concrete detail and
   commentary, and c) a concluding sentence. There are at least two commentaries
   for every concrete detail. In its simplest form, each body paragraph contains at
   least eight sentences (eleven sentences, if an additional concrete detail and
   commentaries are added) arranged in the following way:

       sentence 1:   topic sentence (TS)               sentence 5:   concrete detail (CD)
       sentence 2:   concrete detail (CD)              sentence 6:   commentary (CM)
       sentence 3:   commentary (CM)                   sentence 7:   commentary (CM)
       sentence 4:   commentary (CM)                   sentence 8:   concluding sentence (CS)

5. Topic sentence: the first sentence of a body paragraph. It is narrower than your
   thesis, but still includes a clear subject of that paragraph and has a clear opinion.
   The following sample topic sentence goes along with the previous thesis example:




                                                                                                 1
        When he first appears in the novel, Sydney Carton does not care about himself, nor is he
        concerned about the way in which others view him.

    In this example, the writer has focused on Sydney Carton's behavior at the
    beginning of the novel. The body paragraph that goes with this topic sentence
    would give examples of what Carton says and does that show he does not care
    about himself.

6. Concrete Detail (CD): specific details that are most often what we see and hear
   (facts). In literature essays, this means examples (quotes) from the writing. Your
   quote needs to support your thesis and topic sentence, needs to be framed or
   introduced properly, and needs to be cited correctly. Here is a concrete detail that
   could be used in the paragraph supporting the previous topic sentence example:
        When Carton and Darnay are at the tavern, Carton tells him, "I care for no man on this earth,
        and no man cares for me" (Dickens 103).

7. TLDC/LCD: The acronym for the three parts to a CD sentence is TLCD. These
   letters represent the following:

        T: the transition (For example,)
        L: lead-in (after Scout pummels Walter Cunningham in the schoolyard)
        CD: concrete detail (she says, “...)

        For example, after Scout pummels Walter Cunningham in the schoolyard, she says, “...
        In addition, while spending Christmas at Finch Landing, Francis tells Scout “...
        Furthermore, when Scout and Jem are walking home from the pageant, “...

8. Commentary (CM): your personal opinion, response, reaction, or reflection
   about a Concrete Detail that you are discussing in your essay. When you write
   commentary, you are commenting on a point you have made. Commentary may
   include interpretation, personal response, opinion, analysis, explication, insight,
   and reflection. In a body paragraph, commentary must echo the focus of the topic
   sentence. It does not drift, it is not Concrete Detail, it does not repeat the thesis, it
   is not generic, and does not contradict your thesis and topic sentence.               In
   literature essays, commentary tells the reader what the author of the text meant, or
   what the concrete detail shows about the character as shown below:

            Carton makes this statement as if he were excusing his rude behavior to Darnay.
            However, Carton is only pretending to be polite, perhaps to amuse himself.

9. Conclusion: the last paragraph in your essay. It gives your writing a finished
   feeling and answers the "So what?" question your reader may have after reading
   your essay. It does not repeat words from your paper, especially not from your
   thesis and introductory paragraph. It may do one or more of the following:

            a) sum up your ideas                        d) give a personal statement
            b) reflect on what you said in your essay   e) make predictions
            c) add commentary on your subject           f) include a universal statement



                                                                                                   2
                                            Aesop’s Fables
Directions:
Read the following fables by Aesop, choose one you feel comfortable with, and complete a
SOAPSTone/Style and Rhetorical Appeals Graphic Organizer (take no longer than 10 minutes).

Once you have completed a SOAPSTone/Style and Rhetorical Appeals Graphic Organizer for the fable you
have chosen, write a well –developed essay analyzing the author’s purpose by examining rhetorical
strategies and/or stylistic devices such as overall structure, syntax, diction, figurative language, and
rhetorical appeals. Use the Essay Graphic Organizer provided to create your essay and attach the
SOAPSTone/Style and Rhetorical Appeals Graphic Organizer to the back of your essay.

The Wind and the Sun
Once upon a time when everything could talk, the Wind and the Sun fell into an argument as to which was
the stronger. Finally, they decided to put the matter to a test; they would see which one could make a
certain man, who was walking along the road, throw off his cape. The Wind tried first. He blew and he
blew and he blew. The harder and colder he blew, the tighter the traveler wrapped his cape about him. The
Wind finally gave up and told the Sun to try. The Sun began to smile and as it grew warmer and warmer,
the traveler was comfortable once more. But the Sun shone brighter and brighter until the man grew so hot,
the sweat poured out on his face, he became weary, and seating himself on a stone, he quickly threw his
cape to the ground. You see, gentleness had accomplished what force could not.

The Fox and the Crow
A FOX once saw a Crow fly off with a piece of cheese in its beak and settle on a branch of a tree. “That’s
for me, as I am a Fox,” said Master Reynard, and he walked up to the foot of the tree. “Good-day, Mistress
Crow,” he cried. “How well you are looking today: how glossy your feathers; how bright your eye. I feel
sure your voice must surpass that of other birds, just as your figure does; let me hear but one song from you
that I may greet you as the Queen of Birds.” The Crow lifted up her head and began to caw her best, but the
moment she opened her mouth the piece of cheese fell to the ground, only to be snapped up by Master Fox.
“That will do,” said he. “That was all I wanted. In exchange for your cheese I will give you a piece of
advice for the future—“Do not trust Flatterers.”

The Lion and the Mouse
ONCE when a Lion was asleep a little Mouse began running up and down upon him; this soon wakened the
Lion, who placed his huge paw upon him, and opened his big jaws to swallow him. “Pardon, O King,”
cried the little Mouse: “forgive me this time, I shall never forget it: who knows but what I may be able to
do you a turn some of these days?” The Lion was so tickled at the idea of the Mouse being able to help
him, that he lifted up his paw and let him go. Some time after the Lion was caught in a trap, and the
hunters, who desired to carry him alive to the King, tied him to a tree while they went in search of a
waggon to carry him on. Just then the little Mouse happened to pass by, and seeing the sad plight in which
the Lion was, sent up to him and soon gnawed away the ropes that bound the King of the Beasts. “Was I
not right?” said the little Mouse, “little friends may prove great friends.”

The Fox and the Grapes
ONE hot summer’s day a Fox was strolling through an orchard till he came to a bunch of Grapes just
ripening on a vine which had been trained over a lofty branch. “Just the things to quench my thirst,” quoth
he. Drawing back a few paces, he took a run and a jump, and just missed the bunch. Turning round again
with a One, Two, Three, he jumped up, but with no greater success. Again and again he tried after the
tempting morsel, but at last had to give it up, and walked away with his nose in the air, saying: “I am sure
they are sour.”




                                                                                                           3
                                     Essay Graphic Organizer

Paragraph 1 (Introduction/Thesis):




Paragraph 2 (First Body Paragraph):

Sentence 1 (Topic Sentence):




Sentence 2 (Concrete Detail):




Sentence 3 (Commentary):




Sentence 4 (Commentary):




Sentence 5 (Concrete Detail):




Sentence 6 (Commentary):




Sentence 7 (Commentary):



Sentence 8 (Concluding Sentence):




                                                               4
Paragraph 3 (Second Body Paragraph):

Sentence 1 (Topic Sentence):




Sentence 2 (Concrete Detail):




Sentence 3 (Commentary):




Sentence 4 (Commentary):




Sentence 5 (Concrete Detail):




Sentence 6 (Commentary):




Sentence 7 (Commentary):




Sentence 8 (Concluding Sentence):




Conclusion:




                                       5
                                      Essay Scoring and Rubric
Essays are given a holistic score from 1 to 9. (A score of 0 is recorded for a student who writes completely
off the topic-for example, "Why I think this essay is a waste of time." A student who doesn't even attempt
an essay, who leaves a blank page, will receive the equivalent of a 0 score, but it is noted as a dash [-] on
the reader's scoring sheet.) The reader assigns a score based on the essay's merits as a whole, on what the
essay does well; the readers don't simply count errors. Although each essay topic has its own scoring rubric
(or guide) based on that topic's specific information, a general scoring guide for rhetorical analysis and
argumentation essays follows. Notice that, on the whole, essay-scoring guides encompass four essential
points; readers want your essay to be (1) on topic, (2) well organized, (3) thoroughly developed, and (4)
correct in mechanics and sophisticated in style.

                                              Essay Rubric
       9 Papers earning a score of 9 meet the criteria for 8 papers and, in addition, are especially
       sophisticated in their explanation or argument or demonstrate particularly impressive control of
       language.

8 Effective
8 essays effectively address all the tasks of the essay prompt in well-organized responses. The writing
demonstrates stylistic sophistication and control over the elements of effective writing, although it is not
necessarily faultless. Overall, high-scoring essays present thoroughly developed, intelligent ideas; sound
and logical organization; strong evidence; and articulate diction.
• Rhetorical analysis essays demonstrate significant understanding of the passage, its intent, and the
   rhetorical strategies the author employs.
• Argument essays demonstrate the ability to construct a compelling argument, observing the author's
   underlying assumptions, (addressing multiple authors in the synthesis essay) and discussing many sides
   of the issues with appropriate evidence.

         7 Papers earning a score of 7 fit the description of 6 papers but provide a more complete
         explanation or argument or demonstrate a more mature prose style

6 Adequate
6 essays complete the tasks of the essay topic adequately - they show some insight but usually with less
precision and clarity than high-scoring essays. There may be lapses in correct diction or sophisticated
language, but the essay is generally well written.
• Rhetorical analysis essays demonstrate sufficient examination of the author's point and the rhetorical
   strategies the author uses to enhance the central idea.
• Argument essays demonstrate the ability to construct an adequate argument, understand the author's
   point, and discuss its implications with suitable evidence. The synthesis argument will address at least
   three of the sources.

       5 Essays that earn a 5 score complete the essay task, but with no special insights; the analysis lacks
       depth and merely states the obvious. Frequently, the ideas are predictable and the paragraph
       development weak. Although the writing conveys the writer's ideas, they are presented simplistically
       and often contain lapses in diction or syntax.
       • Rhetorical analysis essays demonstrate uneven or insufficient understanding of how rhetorical
       strategies create an author's point. Often, the writer merely lists what he or she observes in the
       passage instead of analyzing effect.
       • Argument essays demonstrate the ability to present an argument, but they frequently provide
       limited and inadequate discussion, explanation, or evidence for the writer's ideas. The writer may
       not address enough of the sources in the synthesis essay. Oversimplification of the issue(s)
       minimizes the essay's effectiveness.




                                                                                                               6
4 Inadequate
These essays are weaker than the 5 score because the writer inadequately overlooks or perhaps misreads
important ideas in the passage. The student may summarize the passage's ideas instead of analyzing them.
Although the writer's ideas are generally understandable, the control of language is often immature.
• Rhetorical analysis essays demonstrate little discussion of rhetorical strategies or incorrect identification
   and/or analysis of those strategies.
• Argument essays demonstrate little ability to construct an argument. They may not clearly identify the
   author's point, may not present multiple authors' points of view in the synthesis essay, and may offer
   little evidence for the student's position.

          3 Papers earning a score of 3 meet the criteria for a score of 4 but demonstrate less success in
          analyzing strategies or developing a position. The papers may show less control of writing.

2 Little Success
These essays demonstrate little success understanding of the topic or the passage. Perhaps unfinished, these
essays offer no analysis of the passage and little or no evidence for the student's ideas. Incorrect assertions
may be made about the passage. Stylistically, these essays may show consistent grammatical problems, and
sentence structure is usually simple and unimaginative.
• Rhetorical analysis essays demonstrate little ability to identify or analyze rhetorical strategies.
   Sometimes these essays misread the prompt and replace it with easier tasks, such as paraphrasing the
   passage or listing some strategies the author uses.
• Argument essays demonstrate little ability to understand the author's point (or multiple authors in the
synthesis essay) and then construct an argument that analyzes it. Minimal or nonexistent evidence hurts the
essay's effectiveness. Some students may substitute an easier task by presenting tangential or irrelevant
ideas, evidence, or explanation.

          1 Papers earning a score of 1 meet the criteria for a score of 2 but are undeveloped, especially
          simplistic in their explanation and/or weak in their control of language

0 Indicates an on-topic response that receives no credit, such as one that merely repeats the prompt.

-- Indicates a blank response or one that is completely off topic
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                                                                                                                                7
                                                Peer-Editing Instructions

Group Instructions:

     1.   Make sure that everyone in the group has a different colored writing utensil. Use the same color
          for each paper you read.

     2.   Write your code as the first or second editor. Read through the essay once. At this point do not
          make any marks on the paper; you are simply getting an overview of the essay.

     3.   Reread the essay and put brackets around clutter words, phrases, and/or sentences. Also note other
          composition errors, structural problems or stylistic concerns and mark these clearly. Write notes
          in the margin, but do not correct the mistakes—only the author does that.

     4.   Rate each essay, as indicated on the editing sheet, from 0 to 9 based on the criteria presented in the
          Essay Rubric.

     5.   Repeat this process for the next essay.

     6.   After all essays have been read, the group must come to a consensus on the score for each essay.
          Consensus does not mean “average.” If you disagree, discuss the merits and demerits of each
          essay. You may find yourself swayed to a lower or higher score than you originally had awarded.
          When you have reached consensus, write comments in the space provided. Comments should be
          honest, respectful, and taken seriously as you are helping the author develop his/her writing; your
          essay will also be treated with respect (failure of this will result in a meeting with me and a review
          of the rubric).

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


                                                Peer-Editing Instructions

Group Instructions:

     1.   Make sure that everyone in the group has a different colored writing utensil. Use the same color
          for each paper you read.

     2.   Write your code as the first or second editor. Read through the essay once. At this point do not
          make any marks on the paper; you are simply getting an overview of the essay.

     3.   Reread the essay and put brackets around clutter words, phrases, and/or sentences. Also note other
          composition errors, structural problems or stylistic concerns and mark these clearly. Write notes
          in the margin, but do not correct the mistakes—only the author does that.

     4.   Rate each essay, as indicated on the editing sheet, from 0 to 9 based on the criteria presented in the
          Essay Rubric.

     5.   Repeat this process for the next essay.

     6.   After all essays have been read, the group must come to a consensus on the score for each essay.
          Consensus does not mean “average.” If you disagree, discuss the merits and demerits of each
          essay. You may find yourself swayed to a lower or higher score than you originally had awarded.
          When you have reached consensus, write comments in the space provided. Comments should be
          honest, respectful, and taken seriously as you are helping the author develop his/her writing; your
          essay will also be treated with respect (failure of this will result in a meeting with me and a review
          of the rubric).


                                                                                                                                8
                                                        Peer-Editing

Author’s Code: ___________________ Essay Assignment: ____________________

Editor’s Code and Score:
                                Editor #1 ____________________                        Score (0-9) _________

                                Editor #2 ____________________                        Score (0-9) _________

Essay Consensus (0-9): ________
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Comments should be honest, respectful, and taken seriously as you are helping the author develop his/her
writing; your essay will also be treated with respect (failure of this will result in a meeting with me and a
review of the rubric). Write down this writer’s strengths and weaknesses regarding the following:

Thesis:
Has a clear subject?

Has a clear opinion (is debatable) and may explain how author came to this opinion?

Can be supported with significant details?

Is specific, not too broad?

Topic Sentences:
Have clear subjects?

Have clear opinions?

Narrower than thesis?

Concrete Details:
Supports thesis and topic sentence?

Framed or introduced properly?

Quotations are cited correctly (if applicable)?

Commentaries:
Includes personal opinion, response, reaction, or reflection about a concrete detail?

Commentary does not drift?

Commentary is not Concrete Detail (fact)?

Commentary is not generic?

Commentary does not contradict or repeat thesis/topic sentence?

Concluding Sentences:
Satisfying conclusion to paragraph and may transition to next paragraph?

Concluding Paragraph:
Paragraph gives writing a finished feeling?

Answers the "So what?" question reader may have after reading your essay?



                                                                                                                                9
                                           Writing Workshop

Today’s Topic: ___________________________________________________________

Directions: Apply what you have learned in today’s writing workshop lesson to at least two examples
from the student essays you have read today. After, explain how this revision shows more effective and
sophisticated writing than the original.

Example #1:

Original Writing:




Revision:




Explanation for Revision (How does your revision show more effective and sophisticated writing?):




Example #2:

Original Writing:




Revision:




Explanation for Revision (How does your revision show more effective and sophisticated writing?):




                                                                                                         10
Peer Editing Grievance Form

If you disagree with the peer editing score your essay has received and would like me to review your essay
complete this form, attach it to the back of your essay, and return your essay to the appropriate tray the day
after you receive your essay. You only have one day to file a peer editing grievance form (this will usually
be by Thursday since most essays will be returned by Wednesday); I will not accept essays with grievance
forms after the due date and the peer edit score will stand. Filing this form does not guarantee a higher
score; however, you should be as specific as possible under your justification for a new score as this will
help me with the final score. Finally, I will fairly score your essay, which may mean no change to the
original score, a higher score, or even a lower score.

Name ___________________________             Date ______________

Essay Assignment________________________________________

Score you believe your essay should receive _________

Justification for new score

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________



Final Score ________




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