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The
Page 6 Opinion March 27, 2008
The art of The A.I. - Artificial Intelligence?
Pauline Wood
sarcasm
Staff Writer
Hard work leads to good tioned, because with the signing So far this all sounds like an many do not agree with the cur-
grades; it’s not rocket science. of a single check, it seems that amazing opportunity. Students riculum guidelines.
Yet some students at Bellevue students at the A.I. are practi- receive education that prepares “The few Bellevue teachers
get distracted by things such as cally guaranteed a 4.0 GPA. them for the future by dealing who tried to work around the
drama, drugs or overwhelming So how legitimate is A.I.? with college schedules and job curriculum got into trouble,”
amounts of class work, and end “My teachers make me set experience. But, irony aside, it Gerstenberger said.
Tammy Ellenhorn up transferring to schools such goals for myself to com- Classes at the A.I.
“
Monthly Columnist as Chrysalis and The Academic plete homework,” junior are offered on a more
Institute. Bine Vegarra said. Students deserve an A if they college-style schedule.
Some teachers lose as The maximum oc- really learned the material, but if re- On Fridays students
many as six students a year to cupancy in classes is six, are expected to partici-
schools that provide more sup- and during class time stu- ceived for any other reason, an A is “ pate in volunteer work,
Do I look fat in this? port in smaller learning dents work on multiple less notable. job shadows or paid
Yes, you look like you are housing a environments. subjects with the employment.
watermelon under your shirt. And you’re “I decided to same teacher.
Kate Groepper, Spanish Teacher Yes, I agree that
ugly, too, if that was your next question. leave Bellevue According some students may need
Okay, so we all have a friend or two because I was
who acts like this. They possess that sar- tired of the stu-
its website,
Is the A.I. the real to A.I. offers “a
the
seems cheap that these students a more focused school environ-
can pay for their grades while ment to be able to stay on top of
castic, snide sense of humor that confuses pid curricu- deal? range of custom- the rest of us sacrifice social school work. But regardless of
those who prefer a good, old-fashioned lum and all ized education time in favor of school work. this fact, if the rest of us learn
pun. I like to call them Snarks. the pointless solutions.” “It’s hard to know what an to work with the system, then
There has been many a theory about homework as- The school’s A or B would mean at the A.I. why should others get to leave
where these Snarks come from. Some peo- signments I had mission is to Students deserve an A if they for an easier, more rewarding
ple believe they have been plagued from to do,” sophomore “prepare stu- really learned the material, but education?
the womb, the “accident” child who was James Gerstenberger said. dents for if received for any other reason, Students at Bellevue need
simply born with a bit of a mean streak. Perhaps, for this reason, it success, an A is less notable,” Spanish to realize that high school
Others theorize that sarcasm is actu- is beneficial that these schools college and teacher Kate Groepper, said. is demanding and full of
ally imbedded in our DNA. Yep, it’s prob- exist. A more sheltered their life be- Many teachers at Bellevue distractions.
ably your father’s fault that nobody under- environment sounds like yond by helping are forced to stick to the cur- If you suck it up and stay
stands you. the perfect place for those them cultivate a sense of riculum if they want to avoid focused on your goals, you can
As a veteran Snark, I can tell you, it is who lack motivation or capability, determination the administration breathing actually be proud of the grades
not always easy. lose focus easily. But the cred- and resilience, self-advocacy down their necks. As students, you have earned, instead of
There is a very good chance that only ibility of these schools is ques- and a love of learning.” however, we are all aware that knowing you paid for them.
half of your jokes will be understood, and
you may find yourself frequently laugh-
ing at your own jokes without much
accompaniment.
Your friends may never completely
True life: You are being Facebook stalked
Shahny Lutfeali
understand your sense of humor, but you
will always crack yourself up, and that’s Copy Editor
essential (a moment without entertainment “I logged onto my Facebook sometime with predators were noted to be “aggres- been avoided? Wouldn’t it have been smart
would be a moment lost, of course). last month, and everything seemed normal sive,” meaning that the predator forcibly to stop and think for a moment, and decide
For all you Snarks out there born with - a couple friend requests, a few wall posts tried to create physical contact between the that maybe the weird 40-year-old who has
sarcasm as your first language, I give you - but something was wrong. I had been predator and the victim. Even more strik- been “poking” you on Facebook probably
much advice, young grasshoppers. poked….by a rand-o!” senior Alexa Harris ing is the notion that 16 percent of teens are shouldn’t have access to your personal infor-
Love it. Live it. Cherish it. said. mation and pictures?
Confuse your friend who truly thinks Hopefully Call me crazy, but I
gullible isn’t in the dictionary. Never an- this extremely dis- don’t really think that
swer anything with a straight answer. turbing incident is unreasonable.
No means yes and yes means you’re hasn’t happened to We live in a
an idiot and just kidding means you have many of you. If it technological world.
never been more serious in your life. has, maybe you’re Communication, so-
Wind up your buddies until they are just too scared to cial interaction, edu-
so dizzy they no longer try to decipher admit it. Because cation and recreation
your jokes but instead just accept every- the truth, accord- have all been masked
thing you say as the word of God. ing to the PEW by this complex veil
Don’t attempt to explain why Dr. Research Center, we call the Internet.
House is the Oprah of the sarcastic world, is that 32 percent As much as we like
and Dr. Cox from “Scrubs” is your hero. of teens have been to joke about getting
When people tell you you’re mean (or approached online stalked by some weird
a snot, or rude, snooty, mouthy, insolent, by someone with kid from Newport, we
sassy, cheeky, feisty) just explain to them whom they have still have to be safe.
that you were born with sarcasm as your no connection to. Sure, social network-
first language. Call it what you ing sites are excellent
It’s a birth defect, really. Would you want, but I’m go- ways of keeping in
make fun of someone with a birth defect? ing to put it out in touch with friends,
Didn’t think so. Kudos to the many bril- the open – you’re but they are also a
liant students at Bellevue who never run being Facebook breeding ground for
out of knock-knock jokes and have not Stalked! online predators. It’s
been plagued by the Snark epidemic; I “Well, you time for us teenagers
commend you. Feel lucky that people can know when I’m on to get smart and use
actually understand your sense of humor. Facebook, I don’t S.M. JENNY NAM discretion when find-
For those of you who suffer this cruel consider it stalking. Its more or less watch- willing to meet in person with someone that ing friends on Facebook.
addiction, I would recommend attend- ing…all the time,” junior Liam Kelly said. they have befriended online. Don’t fall victim to the traps that these
ing your local Snarks Anonymous meet- Although the mostly harmless nature of So what is the real problem here? creeps are setting out for us. Set your pro-
ing. I mean, who wouldn’t want to stand Facebook Stalking is at times comical, it is Sure, it is easy to pin all the blame on the files on private, double check your friend
up and proclaim “Hi, my name is Tammy important that we note the truly serious na- predators – they initiate the predation and lists and, most importantly, be safe.
Ellenhorn and I am addicted to sarcasm?” ture of what can potentially happen. Over exploit those who are vulnerable and oblivi- The cyber-world is a scary, perverted
30 percent of all online encounters of teens ous. But couldn’t the whole situation have place.
The
March 27, 2008 Opinion Page 7
[Realism] [Crossfire] [Idealism]
Which ideology is superior to the other?
Long Le according to success probability. This Erica Messner Realistic thinkers claim that they are hap-
Graphics Editor mentality limits the number of disap- A&E Editor pier because their expectations of others and
pointments that a realist faces. themselves are “realistic.” However, Gandhi
When considering the current status Knowing which situations can Google “idealist” and you’ll find web- didn’t transform India with realistic expecta-
of the world and predictions for the future, result in success is one thing, but being sites dedicated to philanthropy, imagination tions. He did not give into violence and war,
a person can be categorized into two fac- able to succeed is another. The realist and creative thinking. Google “realist” and the easier, more generally accepted choice. It
tions: idealists or realists. Compared to an sticks with the current flow of the world, the first entry is Wikipedia. Ironic much? In took courage and the belief that people have
idealist who sees the world in terms of its its current system. He knows its causes truth, idealism is a mindset striving towards the potential to change.
potential, a realist simply sees the world and effects, benefits and drawbacks. moral perfection. Although expectations may be realistic
as it is—including its limitations. He Rather than trying to make futile chang- Idealists believe the highest goal is the one person’s mind, they may not be in the
knows what is possible, how to achieve es the system like his idealist counter- most worthy goal (no matter how impossible minds of others.
it and what will most likely happen as a part, the realist takes the necessary steps it may seem). Realism is seeing things the Realists must understand that people’s
result. This includes his expectations of to succeed in the current one. In other way they are, and idealism is seeing them the backgrounds vary widely, and the norm is not
others, the world and ultimately himself. words, the realist knows how to work the way they could be. the same for everyone.
Expecting others to act a certain system and will eventually achieve even Idealism has many draws for the opti- Idealists don’t claim to understand ev-
way is one of the primary sources of more than the idealist. mist and pessimist, contrary to popular belief. eryone and their motivations; they focus on
conflict. Hoping that your boyfriend will Realists are not distracted by ide- While it has fixed principles, it is adaptable to the potential of others without overestima-
remember your four week anniversary is als and abstractions. They stick to what a variety of situations. tion, or worse, underestimation.
the vision of an idealist. Will it happen? they can personally achieve and thrive as An optimist has a traditional idealist per- The most difficult goal to achieve (and
Maybe, maybe not. When expectations a result. They are less prone to be stuck spective that allows them to see the best in the most coveted) is the goal of happiness.
are not met, disappointment is channeled in the cycle of attempt and failure and are people and the good in the world. An idealis- Seeing the potential in the world and
into frustration and anger. A realist, on actually able to achieve what they aspire tic pessimist, even if they might focus on the the potential in people, while not necessarily
the other hand, understands that people to succeed in—that is, if it is feasible. negative aspects of the world and its people, bringing happiness, brings hope.
will drop the ball from time to time, Being able to focus on the will see these shortcomings highlighted Hope is necessary to achieving
and thus gives them some leeway. real world enables realists largely because they are able to see the one’s goals, and an idealist is able
This eliminates the possibility to not only work for their true potential of humanity. to look at realistically dismal cir-
of disappointment and makes benefit, but also for the Seeing this potential will per- cumstances and turn them into
the realist the more agreeable benefit of the world. mit them to work towards positive opportunities.
companion and friend. Thus, the real- change. No matter what the cir-
Realists also benefit ist can identify the success Idealists are the revolutionar- cumstance, they are able to
from the preemptive bracing levels in certain activities, ies, the people this world needs. see the most they can make
for the actual happenings of set reasonable goals for They are not those who look at out of their situation, and
the world. Let’s face it—a himself and work towards change as impossible and one per- without this it is impos-
utopia has equal chance of ex- those goals, becoming the son as insignificant. sible to ever make it into a
isting as a flying pig. Rejection more successful individual. As Martin Luther King, reality.
and dissatisfaction will face He works the system Jr. put it, “an individual To summarize, in
even the most talented of peo- to the best of his abilities and has not started living the words of Benjamin
ple. Realists understand doesn’t expect untenable until he can rise Franklin, “happiness
this danger. Not only change from oth- above the nar- depends more on the
does this prevent ers, himself or row confines of inward disposition
a serious men- the rest of his individual- of mind than on
tal collapse the world. istic concerns outward cir-
that may Granted, re- to the broader cumstanc-
be fol- alists may concerns of es.”
lowed by not reach all human-
depres- for the ity.” While
sion and stars, but realistic
anger, at least thinking is
but al- t h e y important,
l o w s don’t believing in
the re- g e t the possibility
alist to burnt of change and
pick and b y pursuing lofty
choose them. goals is what ul-
s i t u - timately produc-
ations es results.
Excuse my political incorrectness but... I’m a cheap Jew
Tamar Mentzer
Chief Copy Editor reached a new level, or maybe my peers are obscene Jew jokes, unfalteringly delivered I can only hope to see the day when cul-
Self realization is a beautiful thing. especially tuned in to my Judaism at certain by 8-year-old bigot Eric Cartman? I could tural stereotyping is no longer the source of
Over the years I have realized all sorts of times in the year, because the taunting has never deprive myself of something so hilar- so much controversy. For now, I suggest we
things about myself, from my eyes’ color- escalated slightly past my personal comfort ious. Are my friends, then, allowed to laugh all keep a cool head about things and watch
changing ability to the fact that my study zone. at poor Kyle Broflovski till they turn red in our mouths. As a general rule, the touchy
habits are less than ideal. One quality I dis- However, this topic is still of heated de- the face, but never poke fun at me? business of telling a politically incorrect
covered only recently with the help of my bate within my own mind, because I would When all is said and done, cultural sen- joke is like tickling someone: Just because
friends is this: I am unbelievably cheap. I’d rather be thought of as a Cheap Jew than a sitivity is not a purely black and white is- they laugh doesn’t mean they want you to
never have guessed it from my overdrawn hypocrite. I have always been one to keep sue, and thus cannot be approached as one. keep going. Similarly, if your threshold for
checking account or from the hole in my things as politically incorrect as possible, It must ultimately be left up to the individ- provocative humor is not quite as high as
pocket, but one factor trumps these—being given the situation. When it comes to cul- ual to set their own boundaries of political a friend’s ,may be, politely tell him so and
Jewish. tural sensitivity, I generally tend to think correctness. move on with your day.In my case, howev-
Perhaps I began digging my own grave that what this nation needs most is one giant For future reference, my own personal er, I have decided on a different tactic: I will
when I started answering to “Hey, Jew!” “chill pill.” boundary falls somewhere between “Give be personally selling the rights to Jew jokes
without so much as a rolled eye in protest. But if I declare my pride as a Jew, am me your Jew-gold” and “You only killed at a dollar a piece. Not a bad way to make a
But apparently my stinginess has recently I no longer allowed to enjoy “South Park’s” Jesus for the holiday sales.” few bucks, is it?
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