“Free Indeed” by sofiaie


									                    “Letter From M.O.M.”
                        The Monthly newsletter of Moving On Ministry
                                Volume 40 – September. 2008

       “I Can Only Imagine”                                   Intentions & Wishes
        As you receive this volume of                    The intentions of this newsletter
Letter From M.O.M., we have many                 are to allow an understanding of jail &
new writers of articles, we are putting          prison ministries. It is our intentions to
some more of the testimonies of “How             get input from those incarcerated as well
God Changes Lives” as well as some of            as those “free” to visit. Life experiences
our own written articles. We can truly           of the faith and fellowship from those
say that the “high” that many of our             locked up in the facilities are always
inmates have been trying to get through          desired to let others know of the value of
the wrong methods, is being surpassed            “visitation”. I am certain that each of us
by those putting God in control of their         have many stories of the miracles God
lives.                                           has done in our lives.
        Watch our website                                  Our wishes are that we would
www.MovingOnMinistry.com                         have a list of supportive churches that
                                                 individuals might look forward to
We are affiliated with International             attending once released.
Prison Fellowship                                          A list of services, such as
http.//PrisonMinistry.net/movingon               housing, employment, and counseling
                                                 services, as well as some individuals
and Good News Jail & Prison Ministry             available for friendly fellowship are also
Volunteer                                        much needed items.
www.GoodNewsJail.com                                     God‟s Word says if a man
                                                 stumbles, how can he continue lest there
            The Calling                          be another to help him up. Ecc. 4:10
         As we continue to reach out, as         “For if they fall, the one will lift up his
commanded in Matt. 25:34-46, we have             fellow: but woe to him [that is] alone
had individuals reaching back to us. We          when he falleth; for [he hath] not another
have had individuals send stamps to              to help him up.” Proverbs 24:17
donate because they know we do a                 “Rejoice not when thy enemy falleth,
heavy mailing program each month                 and let not thy heart be glad when he
(usually about 300-350 mailings a                stumbleth:” John 11:10 “But if a man
month). We recently had 2 inmates send           walketh in the night, he stumbleth,
$20, and one sent us $100, and those that        because there is no light in him.”
know the prison system, know that this                   Please help us with input for this
is like $1000 donation from the outside.         newsletter as we strive to serve God.
We have had many updating our lists of           We appreciate any articles or input.
resources for pen pals. God bless.

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                1
September 2008
    Addresses to contact              For 2008, Bob is doing Bible study at
     Ministry Volunteers              BWDF on Mondays and Thursdays.
                                               The Sunday after the 2nd
  Moving On Ministry                  Saturday of each month is Bob and
  Chaplain Bob                        Linda‟s assigned day for 3 to 4 chapel
  P.O. Box 6667                       Services at Corcoran State Prison (“Old”
  Visalia, CA. 93290                  Corcoran). 09/14/08, 10/12/08,
                                      11/09/08, & 12/14/08.
  Moving On Ministry                           Bob and Rocky have also added
  Spanish Ministry - Linda            the Miramonte Conservation Camp #5 to
  P.O. Box 6667                       their list of locations to present chapel
  Visalia, CA. 93290                  services.

  Jesus Prayer Ministry
  Sis Denise                                     M.O.M. Needs
  P.O. Box 7925                          o Tractor repair or replacement for
  Chula Vista, CA 91912                    Camp Clarius development.
                                         o Pen-pals to write inmates
  Christ First Discipleship              o Finances
  PMB #198                               o Testimonies
  23170 Northern Ave. Suite B            o Development of Nevada property
  Kingman, AZ 86409-2504                 o Development of Arizona
  Set Free Prison Ministries             o Graphics for books
  Bible Correspondence Course
  P.O. Box 5440
  Riverside, CA. 92517-9986              From the Mom of M.O.M.
                                              Bob’s mother (Mom of
                                      M.O.M.) has requested drawings of
  Prison Fellowship                   what individuals think Heaven will be
  Chuck Colson                        like. We have extended the contest
  P.O. Box 1550                       to run until the end of Oct. 31, 2008,
  Merrifield, VA 22116-1550           for the best drawing and award a
                                      quarterly gift pack for the drawing
 A Helping Hand Prison Ministry
                                              Mom of M.O.M. has also
 117 North Ave. Apt. #1
                                      suggested we add a contest for best
 Owega, New York 13827
                                      poem and award a smaller quarterly
                                      package, so we will include that
                                      contest also ending Oct. 31, 2008.
 Ask for a copy of our complete       Also for those wanting to contribute
 “Resource Supplemental Letter”       drawings for some of our books of
                                      poetry, please contact us. We want
                                      to publish some of the stories and
                                      poems and need graphic drawings
                                      for them.
Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40      2
September 2008
The next time you feel like God          Jonah ran from God
can‟t us you, Remember;
                                         Naomi was a widow
Noah was a drunk
                                         Job went bankrupt
Abraham was too old
                                         Peter denied Christ
Isaac was a daydreamer
                                         The disciples fell asleep while
Jacob was a liar                         praying

Leah was ugly                            Martha worried about everything

Joseph was abused                        The Samaritan woman was
                                         divorced, more than once
Moses had a stuttering problem
                                         Zaccheus was too small
Gideon was afraid
                                         Paul was too religious
Samson had long hair and was a
womanizer                                Timothy had an ulcer

Rahab was a prostitute                   AND

Jeremiah and Timothy were too            Lazarus was dead!
                                         WHAT IS YOUR EXCUSE?
David had an affair and was a

Elijah was suicidal                            Where God guides,
                                               He provides.
Isaiah preached naked

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40         3
September 2008
                    The effect of Interstate Transfer of Inmates

         We want to start this article with       gasoline, the meals for the time gone, the
a letter received. He starts out by               cost of a motel because of the distance
writing;                                          traveled.
         “I want to thank you for the                            Cost of phone
newsletter from M.O.M. It is a pretty                      So we see that visitation will be
good one this time (we hope he means              sacrificed with the intrastate transfers.
also). Well, anyways, I wanted to let you         Well, there is always the phone. Now
know that with all of the over crowding           what about the phone communication?
in the California prison system, the yard         There is already the imposed surcharge
I am on, which is C yard at Corcoran,             on the phone use. There is the high price
there are a lot of us that are going to           per minute of the “prison phone system.”
Arizona. The prison here is sending a             With the interstate transfer, there is the
lot of us off this yard. I might be one of        increased cost of long distance. The
them. Lord willing, I’ll stay here until I        inmate must usually initiate the call and
come off the closed B status, which is 2          that means he or she is at the “mercy” of
½ years. Then I pray that I’ll get moved          the prison systems fees.
closer down south so I can get visits                      Let‟s not just look at the
from my family. As of now, I am too far           problem, but let‟s suggest some
away for my family to come see me,                solutions. The surcharges need to be
because of gas prices being so high. It is        looked at. These should not be for a get
really hard to raise my son over the              rich quick scheme for the facility.
phone and through the mail.. Now the                       How can we get better prices on
prison wants to send me out of state, and         phone rates? With the ever present
it will cost even more to call home. I            appearance of voice over IP (VoIP), we
just don’t understand how this, “so               see the ads of “Unlimited long distance
called,” prison system works. I guess             for just $24.95 a month.” Most of the
the system is made to keep guys in, and           facilities have already started
for them to continue to return. I have            transitioning for VoIP for intra-facility
not seen my family since 2005. So                 calls.
please, if you could keep me in prayer,                               Mail
for not going out of state . . .”                          Oh well, even if they cannot
                                                  visit, and the phone calls are too
                 Visitation                       expensive, there is still mail. Except that
         Let‟s start with the fact of             the mail now has another 2 to 5 days
visitation. Recovery of inmates requires          added to it for delivery. There is a
visitation and the proper type of people          greater chance of lost mail or damaged
around the individual. Making the task            mail. We have one individual alone that
of visitation (those that do it know              we have gotten 5 letters from that were
“task” is an understatement) is hard              damaged, with two of them with
enough with the red tape, scheduling,             contents totally missing and one of them
yard lock downs, and times allotted.              was just the front portion of the
Adding a major travel to be planned into          envelope. This is just from one of the
this task makes it an even greater                individuals that write to us.
hardship. There is the increase cost of                    How about doing Rehabilitation?

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                  4
September 2008
            Letters that Express it All                           bring about the righteous life that God
        We like to post real life                                          A quick tempered man does
situations, because God works in                                  foolish things. A hot tempered man stirs
real lives and He is the one that                                 up dissention, but a patient man calms a
gives “Eternal Life.” Every week we                               quarrel, for anger lasts only a moment,
get many letters that state “I love                               but favor lasts a life time and weeping
hearing the testimonies.” There are                               may remain for a night, but rejoicing
so many, we cannot publish them all,                              comes in the morning.
and the sad part is – people not                                           Do not take revenge, my friends,
involved in jail/prison ministry do not                           but leave room for God‟s wrath, for it is
get to read the many letters we                                   written: “It‟s mine to revenge, I will
receive daily (average 2 to 11 each                               repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary,
day) and try to keep up with and                                  “If your enemy is hungry, feed him, if he
answer.                                                           is thirsty, give him something to drink.
***********************************************************       In doing this, you will heap burning
             Encouragement                                        coals upon his head. Do not be
Sis Denise from Jesus Prayer Ministry                             overcome by evil, overcome evil with
keeps in constant contact with me &                               good,”
encourages me. I really need that right                                    But now you must rid yourselves
now. Its hard not to become a product of                          of all such things as these: anger, rage,
my environment & fall into the devils                             malice, slander, and filthy language from
plan. I am working on your request for                            your lips, for a gentle answer turns away
drawings of Heaven, cuz I really need                             wrath, but harsh word stirs up anger.
that quarterly package, that‟s a great                                     A man‟s wisdom gives him
incentive. How long of limit does our                             patience; it is to his glory to overlook an
testimony have? Can you edit and cut                              offence.            SW
and paste? Pretty sure you won‟t need
all of it. OK. Well I‟ll look forward to                          ***********************************************************
mail call.        YA                                                               Welcome
                                                                  We would like to send a welcome to
Note: The testimony varies with the                               those individuals that have attended one
amount of time spent lost, the amount of                          of our chapel services. We are currently
time saved, the battles fought, and the                           doing services at Bob Wiley Detention
learning experiences learned. Write the                           Facility, Visalia, CA (BWDF); Men‟s
testimony, and we will edit the print to                          Correction Facility, Visalia, CA (MCF);
help keep Gods victory expressed.                                 “Old” Corcoran State Prison, Corcoran,
                                                                  CA (CSP), and have just started going to
***********************************************************       Miramonte Conservation Camp #5,
        A Letter About Anger                                      Miramonte, CA. We would also like to
         From God’s Words                                         express a special thanks to Rocky that
My brothers, take note of this;                                   has been greatly involved, and for prayer
                                                                  requests for Paula, Bryon, and others
         Everyone should be quick to                              requesting to join us in sharing the Word
listen, slow to speak, and slow to                                of God.
become angry, for man‟s anger does not                            ***********************************************************

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                                  5
September 2008
                             Promotion or Squatter

        “Seeking God’s will and filling          saying “God I want to „receive‟
His calling.” These are hard words for           salvation, but never want to have to
us to understand.                                preach or go on a mission trip.” This is
                                                 more like, “God I want what you have,
         Individuals are seen preaching          but really just want to be a squatter on
from the pulpits, leading Bible groups,          your possessions.” We expect God to
and participating in ministry. Then we           take care of everything and we just want
look at their family and see children,           use of it.
grand-children, and relatives lost and                    God‟s Word says that when we
going to Hell. God ALWAYS puts                   are saved, “therefore if any man be in
salvation as a first priority, and the           Christ, he is a new creature, old things
salvation of the family is the first on          are passed away; behold all things are
God‟s list. Many times the salvation is          become new.” (2 Cor. 5:17). Knowing
“soft sell” to the family members and the        this, why are we so quick to accept that
“false” assurance of salvation is felt.          someone is saved, based just on their
These individuals still live their sinful        statement.
life, but play like (and might even                       There is a phrase that is used in
believe) they are saved.                         the Christian circles, “your walk talks
         For a person to truly accept            more than your talk talks.” What this
Christ as Savior, would be much the              means that what people see in your life
same as receiving a promotion at work,           has a stronger impact than the things you
or a graduation from school or college.          say. As we study the Bible, we see
The result is because of a change. There         numerous scriptures that refer to
has been a different desire put in the           “repentance.” Real repentance always
individuals.                                     alters the character of an individual.
         Bob has shared with many                Repentance means you realize you are
individuals, that when an offer is put out       guilty. Repentance means the world
to accept Christ, the individuals raise          may call you a fool or religious fanatic.
their hand, and the individuals come             Repentance means you may suffer
forward to pray the prayer; many times           financially. Repentance is a continuing
all that has happened is the individuals         thing – We go on confessing our sins (1
got some exercise (walking the isle), and        John 1:9,10). Repentance is the
got wet (if being baptized).                     predecessor of asking for forgiveness.
         Salvation is actually not about         Repentance can best be described as;
“receiving” but is rather about “giving.”            1. Stop what you are doing
Bob used to talk about giving God                           We must have change – Old
“control” of your life. Control is                          passed away, all things new
something that can change back and                   2. Turn around
forth. In reality, salvation is about                       Go the other direction – we
giving God “ownership” of our life.                         were headed the wrong way
When something is owned, the owner                   3. Follow Jesus
can do “what he wants, where he wants,                      We had to turn around to do
when he wants, and how he wants”                            this.
with that item. We see individuals

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                 6
September 2008
Are the prisoners behind the bars, or the ones on the outside?

         This article was again stirred          may find it difficult for rehabilitation
because of a letter written to Chaplain          after years of prison.
Bob. I believe that most inmates we try                  I thank you so much for the
to keep in contact with, realize that            effort you have made so far, and I pray
sometimes Bob gets behind in his letter          that the Lord will open a new door to
writing. Many times, he spends his               my support.
lunch hour writing letters. Often, he will               I have not received a letter from
come home late at night after one of his         the church. Thanks for delivering my
Bible sessions, and do some of the               message to Karen and Pastor Mike.
letters.                                                 Please, your prayers are much
         Many of you will remember               needed.            Natty
Natty that is incarcerated in Egypt. We
printed his testimony in Volume 33,                      Our concern is the lack of
February 2008, of “Letter From                   concern to even write a postcard to just
M.O.M.” Natty had sent some samples              say “Thanks” or as was listed in a
of his bead craft that he does, wishing to       previous article, sending a postcard
market them in America, and had sent             saying, “We do not correspond with
two items to be given to Karen, the new          inmates.”
pastor‟s wife. We were unable to catch                   As we see the lack of “simple”
Karen, so the items were left for Karen,         reaching out to the lost, the needy, or
at her church office, with a copy of             those seeking guidance, we think of the
Natty‟s testimony, and the letter he sent,       scripture in Matthew 25:42-46
with his address, to say he wished for
Karen to receive the gifts.                      Matthew 25:42 For I was an
                                                 hungred, and ye gave me no meat:
                                                 I was thirsty, and ye gave me no
       The following is the letter Natty         drink:
mailed on July, 29, 2008 and M.O.M.              Matthew 25:43 I was a stranger,
received on August 22, 2008.                     and ye took me not in: naked,
                                                 and ye clothed me not: sick, and
                                                 in prison, and ye visited me
Dear Chaplain Bob and Linda;                     not.
                                                 Matthew 25:44 Then shall they
        Greetings to you in Jesus’               also answer him, saying, Lord,
name. Thanks so much for your letters            when saw we thee an hungred, or
of July 6th and the Letter From                  athirst, or a stranger, or
                                                 naked, or sick, or in prison,
M.O.M. volumes 34-38.                            and did not minister unto thee?
        I appreciate your efforts trying         Matthew 25:45 Then shall he
to help raise funds for me through my            answer them, saying, Verily I
crafts. I know it is not easy these days,        say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did
                                                 [it] not to one of the least of
as things have changed in the world,             these, ye did [it] not to me.
including in America – the major                 Matthew 25:46 And these shall go
supporter of the poor of the world.              away into everlasting
Anyhow, the idea is to raise funds thru          punishment: but the righteous
the crafts, not as a business, just for my       into life eternal.
coming release from the prisons, as I

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                 7
September 2008
Poetry Section

                                Moving On
                               Chaplain Bob

                     If God chooses to call me home,
                  I’ll know my work on earth is done.
                  On this earth I shall no longer roam.
                You’ll know to Heaven I am “moving on.”

                          I did the ministering,
                         And I’ve kept the faith.
                         I’ve run long and hard,
                        But have finished the race

                      I’ve shared the “Good Word,”
                        With more than just a few.
                     When you and I came in contact,
                     Hopefully I shared it with you.

                   As we are called, to plant the seed,
                      We often don’t see the crop.
                 But God promises the increase in deed,
                     Whether we believe it or not.

               He says His word will not come back void
               God cannot lie, that is impossible it’s true
             He promises an increase of 30X, 60X, or 100X.
                    And He always comes through.

                       So, till you are called home,
                        And your time has past.
                       Keep your eyes on the Lord
                       Keep your feet on the path,

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40        8
September 2008

                                   Runako Lutalo Ayers

         Hello. My name is Runako                            My mother too my father to child
Lutalo Ayers, a 32 year old, God fearing            custody court and the judge awarded full
man, who found and allowed God to                   custody of me over to my mother. At
come home and reside here inside of my              that moment, my father broke down and
heart in August of 2004. Before I start, I          began to cry uncontrollably throughout
want it to be known that it has been                the courthouse. At this time, I became
Chaplain Bob and Sister Linda, who‟s                what you would call a “momma‟s boy.”
given me the inspiration to come                    Those are some really precious moments
forward with my testimony, plus I                   to me. My mother and I were the best of
wanted to contribute to a “God given                friends. We even had our own song I
cause,” to maybe even be an inspiration             made up, called “Hold my Hand and
in someone else‟s life, to come forward             Trust Me.” Those were the days! My
and also share their testimony with us all          mother and I stayed with my
at M.O.M.                                           Grandparents for a few years. Then my
         Well, when I look back at my               mother met a guy named “Rudy” who
childhood, for the most part, I was a               played the guitar in a band. He and my
pretty happy child. My mother had me                mother got temporarily married for a few
all to herself for the first couple of years        years, so I got a home out in Hillcrest. It
of my life.                                         was a nice two story home and we were
         When I was about two years old,            happy doing the “family thing.” Slowly,
my father came and took me away from                but surely, things began to fall apart for
my mother. While I was with my father,              my mother and Rudy‟s marriage. After
he showered me with, unconditional                  a few years, they became separated, so
love. He had this “child car seat                   she and I moved back in with my
backpack” type of apparatus. He used to             grandparents (my mom‟s mother and
always strap it on his back, put me in it,          father). Then shortly after, Rudy and my
and he‟d walk me all around for miles               mother‟s divorce became final.
and miles, from early in the morning,                        I attended Highland Elementary
until dusk, showing me off to the world,            School from Kindergarten to sixth grade.
often approaching complete strangers,               In 1985, we lost my grandfather to
introducing himself, saying “this is my             cancer. Years prior to his passing over,
son right here. His name is Runako.”                he had a massive stroke and half of his
To say the least, he was surely a proud             left side of his body was paralyzed.
father of his only son! This went on for                     When my grandfather left us, all
a total of three years. When I was five             that was left, was me, my mother, and
years old, a bitter child custody bout              my grandmother. My mother worked
took place between both my father and               hard for years at “Mare Island Navel
mother.                                             Shipping,” struggling hard to bring food
                                                    to the table. She was often gone

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                   9
September 2008
working hard. Most of the time, I was             years). This encounter wasn‟t cool and
always in school. I became infatuated             it really messed me up. I took the blame
with martial arts, so I went out for              and thought that it was all my fault. This
Karate lessons for a short while. I found         incident crushed my loving mother. I
a few other guys who shared a love for            was my mother‟s only child. Honestly,
Karate in school, so we became buddies,           in ways I think my mother took it harder
started hanging out, and slowly, but              than I did. My mother took me to seek
surely, I began to start using what I was         counseling and it really didn‟t help me
taught in Karate class on other kids in           with healing, because I mostly shut
school.                                           down and “withdrew” myself from the
         I started getting in trouble in          help they were trying to provide for my
school fighting and I started getting             unpleasant trauma I suffered coming up
suspended as well. When my mom                    as a child. Like I said, I felt I was to
would get home from work, she‟d                   blame for what happened to me when I
“paddle my behind” until it was sore.             was a child.
I‟d be good for a while, then I‟d be back                  Junior high school came around
up to the old “tricks,” again getting into        and I did pretty well in all of my classes,
trouble some more. This went on for a             seventh through ninth grade. I had a
few times. At home, my grandmother                couple of fights there in between, ut over
and I were an unbreakable “item.” She             all, things were cool. In junior high, I
loved me and spoiled me rotten (she‟s             began to hang around “hip” kids, the
one of the sweetest women who‟s ever              “cool” crowd. I began to “dibble and
stepped on the face of the Earth, I miss          dabble” in the realm of drugs. “Mary
her so much). She and I had an                    Jane was my claim to fame.” Marijuana
unbreakable bond. Time flew by and                was my drug of choice. I went “girl
before I knew, I was almost out of                crazy,” and became a “party animal.”
Elementary. I suffered some extreme               Nevertheless, each and every party I
childhood traumas (prior to now, I‟ve             ever attended, I was the “center of
never spoke of what I‟m about to                  attention.” I was the “life of the party.”
confess). At nine years old, I was                My peers loved me. They called me a
sexually abused (two times) twice by my           few different names, “Nak$tar,” :Knock
then sixteen year old female cousin (who          „um out Nako.” “Nak „um out,” or just
was my cousin through marriage). She              plain old “Nak.” The best one of all was
told one of her friends, who stayed a few         my mom‟s personal nickname, which
houses down from my grandmother‟s                 was “Naky Bear.”
house. My grandmother babysat her a                        I liked my mom‟s nickname the
few nights, and she tried to make me              most. My birthname is Runako Lutalo,
perform some “unspeakable acts” on her.           which means “Handsome Warrior” in
I ran like crazy, and threatened to               the Bantu tribe in Swaheli, the native
“tattle” if she didn‟t leave me alone (I          language in Africa. As I stated earlier, I
believe she got the hint).                        believe my mother took my childhood
         Three more years went by and             trama harder than I ever did, because she
yet, again I was sexually abused at the           would always be on the phone crying.
tender age of twelve years old, this time         Then she started drinking a lot, for the
by a complete total stranger (I‟ve told           most part, unhappy about what happened
people about this experience over the             to me, and over things going on in her

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                 10
September 2008
personal life. Around ninth grade                   I made it into the prison system in 1996,
summer is when my life began to spiral              I arrived at San Quentin State Prison
uncontrollable. At this time, I had                 wqhen I was 20 years old, then shortly
already been adopted by my                          there after, I arrived to “Old” Corcoran
neighborhood gang. Coming into                      State Prison, California‟s “second” most
contact with my first firearm, I went gun           violent and deadliest prison, state wide.
crazy. One of my gang members was                            For the most part, let‟s just say
shot behind me, beating up this other               that I truly had to make a choice to grow
guy from the other side of town. It was             up and I mean grow up fast, like grow up
a retaliation shooting. On a different              “over night!” Let me tell you, prison life
occasion, I was shot by enemy gunfire in            here at Corcoran State Prison back in
a drive-by shooting. The bullet to this             1996 (3B yard, level 4), wasn‟t no joke
very day, is lodged deep in my left leg,            and nothing to fool around with; prison
resting behind my left kneecap.                     riots was jumping off left and right,
         While all this “madness” was               fights, stabbings/stickings, mutual
taking place in my life, I was on the run,          combats, melee‟s brawling group fights,
away from home., I jetted out at the age            assaults on staff, lockdown after
of fourteen (I still attended school daily),        lockdown, more drugs were probably in
my gang member home-boys and I put                  here than on the streets. I say guys
some money together and bought an                   making a fortune, buying their girl
arson of drugs, guns, and firepower. We             friends and wives cars, homes,
all had a variety of gun‟s and “amo” and            businesses, and supporting their children
an assortment of narcotics. We were                 from here on the “inside.” I was like
dealing it all – weed, meth, heroin, and            “WOW” taking it all in.
cocaine. We were all youngsters making                       When I first came in, I was
a lot of money, fast money, thousands               “taken under the wing,” by a “triple
almost over night it seemed. I‟ve never             O.G.,” of the infamous Black Gorilla
had so many clothes, cars, different cell           Family (BGF), or better known as
phones and beepers, money and girl                  “Jama,” a structured prison organization
friends like that in my life at such a              that has the ties from the “inside” and
young age, during this time of the “good            also out to society as well. Back then, I
Life” (or what I thought was the good               was still “young and wild,” twenty-one
life back then). Boy, was I wrong !!!               years old, I quickly earned my way up in
         It wasn‟t all “roses” from the age         rank to a “seven star general,” (I was
of fourteen to eighteen. My life was a              young and ambitious), which is “top
“revolving door,” to the juvenile judicial          dog.” By twenty-three, years old, I was
system. I began catching cases. It                  lacing youngsters, giving them the
seemed like every time I blinked twice, I           “scoop” on survival here within the
was back on the “inside.” I went                    confines of this “concrete jungle.” I
through it all, you name it. Juvenile hall          made sure each one of my young
numerous times, group homes, county                 protégés were “groomed” and well
boy‟s ranch two different times, the                ”laced,” educated with all the teachings
California Youth Authority for a “90                that were handed down to me from when
day” observation, the county jail, and              I first came inside of that brotherhood.
state prison. At the tender age of                  That cycle took place over and over,
eighteen, I caught a lot of time in 1994.           time after time, again and again, I started

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                   11
September 2008
“kicking back” in the late 1990‟s. I was          and “Gospel” music for me these days.
in school and earning substantial                 After two years into my adventure living
achievement of academic awards.                   for the Lord, He called my loving
        For different things like “written        mother to go home with Him, up in
expression,” comprehension, etc. I                Heaven on Monday, January 9th, 2006,
started getting on “fire” with trying to          between 3:00 and 3:15 PM. She was
find myself. I was doing pretty good to.          49½ at the time. Accepting this reality
By twenty-seven, I was done with the              wasn‟t easy for me. I was a “momma‟s
whole “seven star general” outfit. I was          boy,” my mother‟s only child, so when
more on a theology and “philosophy”               she departed this earth, I too felt a piece
trying to find myself type of mission.            of me died with her, but it truly helped
From my childhood into my pre-                    me find myself (Thank God).
adulthood, my father was “in and out” of                   And I can truly say that when
my life. In August of 2004, two months            you loose someone as close as a parent,
after my twenty-eighth birthday, I was            a child, a brother, a sister, A niece, a
told of my beloved mother‟s bout being            nephew, or a true sincere friend, healing
diagnosed with tongue cancer (she was             comes in time. I‟m here to say that there
47 years old at that time). This is the           is “sunshine” at the end of the “rainbow”
time when I began going to each Sunday            and before you do become stronger in
church service and Thursday Bible study           due time. Also, God will never put too
– getting to know and learn about my              much upon your shoulders to bear all at
Heavenly Father, and Jesus Christ.                one time. In fact, He will bring certain
        I just threw the towel in the ring        things inside of your life to bring you
and said “God, all of this is too much to         closer to Him, our mighty all loving God
bear, I need your help, your guidance,            we worship, cherish and share works in
your healing power, your protection,              the most mysterious realm of ways. He
your care and your understanding,                 is shelter, our refuge, and our salvation,
because Lord, I can‟t do it without you           oh what a divine, glorious and gracious
and whatever you do, please heal my               Lord and Savior we serve. Thank you
precious mother from cancer, however, I           Jesus, Hallelujah !! I encourage each
place my all in your loving hands. May            and everyone of you who reads my
your will be done! (Praise God)                   testimony, to trust and believe in God;
        I did this week after week, month         God is the key and the answer to any and
after month, and finally year after year          all situations. May God‟s divine
My old comrades still wanted me to roll           wisdom and grace be unto you all, in
with them, which I couldn‟t, I was                Christ Jesus. RLA
adhering to my “calling” My only vice I
was struggling with was rap, hip-hop,                      I dedicate this testimony to my
music with hostile lyrics, which I can            mother, Ruth Yvone Bray, the precious
now say is no longer a part of me. It is          woman who gave me life.
no longer my forte. Its all about “R&B”           -------------------------------------------------

Letter From M.O.M. Volume 40                 12
September 2008

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