Telstar _1971_ Ltd Telstar _1971

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					                                                                                                                                Saturday, November 28                         Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:
       Telstar (1971) Ltd                                           Sang’s Meats                                                Time: 10:00 am—4:00 pm                        1. The later you are, the more ex-
           301 Centre St Phone: 642-3623                                 Main St. Rockglen, Sk.
                                                                                                                                                                              cited your dogs are to see you.
                         Assiniboia                              Custom Cutting & Wrapping
                                                                  .39 per lb-includes double wrapping.
                                                                                                                                      Open House
      LG 50PQ30 50 inch 720p Plasma HDTV                                                                                                                                      2. Dogs don't notice if you call them

 Reg. Price
                                           Resolution 720p
                                                                 Deboning Roasts & Wrapping
                                                               Custom Sausage Making & Curing
                                                                                                                                           At                                            by another dog's name.
                                           Display Type HD
 You save                                   Screen size 50”
                                                                       Custom Butchering                                                Glow Spa                                          3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of
                                                                                                                                                                                          things on the floor.
 $200.00                                Aspect ratio 16:g     *Bring them to us or we’ll come to you*
                                                                                                                                Com e by take a look and be inform ed by
 You Pay       $1199.00             Energy Star Compliant              476-2071 or                                              all the w onder ful services available at                 4. A dog's parents never visit.
                                                                                                                                GLOW...while y our ther e, sign y our nam e
                                                                      476-7758 cell                                             for door prizes. Lots of tips for beauty, a
                                                                                                                                                                              5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your
                       A man runs into the vet’s office                                                                         h ealthy life style and gift ideas!
                      carrying his dog, screaming for                                                                                                                         voice to get your point across.
                      help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his dog                              520 centre street ( medical centre )
                      down on the examination table. The vet examines the still, limp body and after a                                                                        6. You never have to wait for a
                                                                                                                                 For more info call : 266– 4227               dog; they're ready to go 24 hours
                      few moments, tells the man that his dog, regrettably, is dead. The man, clearly
                      agitated and not willing to accept this, demands a second opinion.                                                                                      a day.
                      The vet goes into the back room and comes out with a cat and puts the cat down
next to the dog’s body. The cat sniffs the body, walks from head to tail, poking and sniffing the dog’s                                                                       7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.
                                 body and finally looks at the vet and meows.                                 TOWN OF ASSINIBOIA Requires a
                                 The vet looks at the man and says, “I’m sorry, but the cat thinks that       Clerk II-Casual Permanent Position (24 hrs/wk)                  8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
 Dr. Richard Turriff you’re dog is dead, too.” The man is still unwilling to accept that his                  As part of the administration staff you will act as
  OPTOMETRIST                    dog is dead. So the vet brings in a black Labrador retriever. The lab        receptionist and provide a variety of clerical duties                     9. A dog will not wake you up at
    Medical Dental Centre        sniffs the body, walks from head to tail, and finally looks at the vet and   within the Assiniboia RCMP Detachment Office.                             night to ask, ?If I died, would you
          Assiniboia             barks. The vet looks at the man and says, “I’m sorry, but the lab thinks     Responsibilities will include providing public with                       get another dog??
                                 your dog is dead too.”                                                       general information, typing correspondence and
          642-4632               The man, finally resigned to the diagnosis, thanks the vet and asks
         Office Hours:                                                                                        other documents and general office duties.                                10. If a dog has babies, you can put
                                 how much he owes. The vet answers, “$650.”                                   The successful applicant will posses strong typing,             an ad in the paper and give them away.
      Monday to Friday           “$650 to tell me my dog is dead?” exclaims the man.
        9 a.m. ~ 5 p.m.                                                                                       keyboard, interpersonal, public relations, and oral
                                 “Well,” the vet replies, “I would only have charged you $50 for my           communication skills. Experience and working                    11. A dog will let you put a
                                 initial diagnosis. The additional $600 was for the cat scan and lab          knowledge of Windows computer operating systems                 studded collar on it without call-
                                 tests.                                                                       is a definite asset for the position. The successful            ing you a pervert.
                                                                                                              applicant will be required to meet a security
                                                                                                              clearance.                                                      12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they
        Folk’s Barber Shop                                                                                    This is an in-scope position with salaries and
                                                                                                              benefits in accordance with the current collective
                                                                                                                                                                              don't get mad.
         “Where Friends Meet”                                                                                                                                                 They just think it's interesting.
                                                                                                              bargaining agreement.
            128-1st Ave. N.W.
                                                                                                              Closing Date: December 19, 2009                                 13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup
              Moose Jaw
                                                                                                              Forward resumes to: “Clerk II-RCMP”                             truck.
           692-7211                                                                                                                c/o Administrator
        Shop Hours                 Come again,                                                                                                                                                And last, but not least:
                                   You’re always                                                                                   Town of Assiniboia
  Mon-Fri: 7:30 am-5:00 pm          Welcome!!                                                                                      Box 670
    *No Appointments*                                                                                                              Assiniboia, Sk. S0H 0B0                                    14. If a dog leaves, it won't
Operators: Jerry Folk & Marlene McDonald                                                                                                                                                      take half of your stuff.
                (Formerly of Franklin Barber Shop)
                                                                     HOUSEHOLD                                              ANTIQUES & COLLECTABLES
    LEWANS & FORD                                                                                                                                                         s
      Barristers & Solicitors
        Paul J. Lewans
                                       Large brown striped sectional in good shape. 14 ft across the back. great
                                      for rumpus room. asking $250. Goose feather mattress pad for double
                                      bed. like new. $45 Rice/vegetable steamer, used once $20. Moulinex
                                                                                                                      Old comic books-Collector condition.
                                                                                                                      Offers Call 473-2447 or 268-2020
           B.A., L.L.B.               meat grinder with attachments, Hardly used. $20. Two computer desks-            LIFE LESSONS:                                                  CENTRE
           Kim Ford                   $15 ea. entertainment unit-$60. Master craft cordless drill with 2 batteries
            B.A., LL.B.               and charger-$10. Large quantity of fabric, and pieces of fabric for quilt-      Burn the candles, use the nice sheets,      “Complete Auto body Repair”
  642-4520 642-3543                   ing $25 for all. Call 640-8658                                                  wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it
                                                                                                                                                                   Windshield Installation/Repair
   228 Centre St. P.O. Box 759        TV stand 20" x 60" x 72" $150. Call 266-4872                                    for a special occasion. Today is special.
         Assiniboia, Sk.                                                                                                                                           SGI Body Integrity Inspections
                                      Danby Counter top dishwasher $100. Microwave stand $30.
       Monday-Friday                  Call 642-4096                                                                   Over prepare, then go with the flow.         24 Hour TOWING 640-7012
       8:30-5:00 p.m.                 Black & White kitchen set table is 36x48 with 12" leaf and 4 chairs. Exc.
                                                                                                                                                                                                          114-2nd Ave. W.
                                                                                                                      Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old                                                  Assiniboia, SK
                                      Cond. $250. OBO; H2O mop steam cleaner; 2 pair kitchen curtains                 age to wear purple.
                                      (Red) 60x14-valance reverses to checks Tiers are plain red. 60x36 never                                                                                    Phone (306) 642-3505
                                      used $10. a pair. Call 642-4365                                                                                                                              Fax (306) 642-4020
                                                                                                                      No one is in charge of your happiness
                                      Microwave stand 72" H x 30" Wx15" D at top-good cond. White Asking              but you.
                                      $100. Call 642-5802
        Dionne Tjeltveit              Shaw Cable Receiver with remote $30. Dark Oak Coffee Table & 2 end                                                                                Thrifty Foods
   Local Sales Representative         Tables with storage underneath $150. for all 3 or $75. each
      Cell: 306-640-7480              Call 642-4649                                                                                                                                               1st Week               Bar fridge, stove, mattress, genie, crib set, Christmas lights, clothing rack                                                                          of each month!!!
         Specializing in:             Call 642-3065                                                                                                                                         1st Tuesday is 10% Day
     Residential, Commercial,         Sit up bar, 2 inside shelves & cupboard, finished in laminate mahogany
       Farms/Acreages and
                                                                                                                                                                                               Enter all week to win
                                      & cedar $40. Call 642-4884
     Free Market Evaluations                                                                                                                                                              $100 of groceries
                                      Golden oak table with a 30" leaf, 4 chairs, 2 captain chairs, large buffet                                                                           with every $50 purchase
                                      & lighted Hutch w/cut glass windows. Solid wood NO veneers.
 To speak gratitude is courteous      Call Anita 472-5917 email                                                                                                            642-5125
and pleasant, to enact gratitude is
                                      Treadmill-like new $4500. Older dark wall unit $30. Glider Rocker $20.
 generous and noble, but to live
                                      Can be seen in Coronach Call Linda 267-2475 (Coronach)
  gratitude is to touch Heaven.
     - Johannes A. Gaertner           Kenmore 600 series Washer & Dryer only used 6 mths, (white) $600.
                                      OBO Call 473-2486
                                      Cordon Bleu Prof. Cookware set.- Temp zone 7 ply stainless steel 17 pc
  Prairie Produce                     pots & Pans & electric fry pan, egg poacher, 1 melting bowl insert & 1-5
       420 Centre St.                 piece food processor. Like new $1000. Call Diane 473-2486                              50th Anniversary                                             221 Centre St. 642-5491
       Assiniboia SK                                                                                                     ROTARY CAROL FESTIVAL                      I have always
                                      32" RCA Tube TV $70. Call 642-5486                                                                                                               Need your CHRISTMAS CARDS?
      Book Now                                                                                                                Sunday Dec. 6th 2 pm                    thought the     Come in and check out what our
          For                                                                                                                                                      actions of men         KODAK MACHINE
                                                      LIFE LESSONS:                                                            Conexus Auditorium                       the best              will do for you
      Christmas                                       It's OK to get angry with God.. He can take it.                         Prince of Wales Centre                  interpreters    Get creative with your own pictures and
                                                                                                                                                                         of their     send a unique dynamic Christmas Card.
    Fruit & Veggie                                                                                                           Admission $3.00                                                         Tanning Specials
                                                      Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.                                                           thoughts.
        Trays                                                                                                           or equivalent items for the                                                  Lotion of the month
                                                                                                                                                                                                     & Great Christmas
      642-4211                                        When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.                        Food Bank                             ~John Locke                            Ideas

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