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This hooded girl went to market

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					The Tentagatnet, a play by Peter Dizozza, for March 29th, 2005
With music for Flute, Clarinet, Guitar and Cello and Four Voices

6 CHARACTERS and NARRATOR (To read descriptions and
stage directions)

Gormin Dial (Husband), in his 50‟s.
Orma Dial (Wife) in her 50‟s.
The “Dials.” A “perfectly ordinary” conservative married couple
living, modestly but relatively prosperously, in the present day, in
a 1930‟s cottage built into a mountainside. They are always
together. They rarely go out. They no sooner begin to interact
with each other than they are arguing about their fidelities to truth,
beauty, decency, and each other.

Dot Strant
This hooded shopper went to market to keep her slipshod slapped-
together scrappy family in provisions and supplies. It appears she
has orders to do so, and that her destination, the supermarket, is
supremely foreign to her. Of indeterminate age, she turns out to be
a female magician, deceptive, in that she is cloaked. A woman of
surprising capabilities, she is devoted to her long-term boyfriend,
Joralmon.

Joralmon Wigdor
Her servant/master, an insomniac, partying all night, then up at
dawn to take out the morning trash. His girlfriend, Dot, and two
other disenfranchised (because of their freakish appearance)
friends are living in his childhood trailer home. As a holdout to the
development of the area around him, he has made enemies in his
time, but among his friends he creates a rural utopian commune,
from which he often escapes to his private lair, an add-on to the
trailer.



Page 1, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Of the two remaining people who live with them, one is a
“preemie” baby with a tendency to shove his long fingers down his
throat until he chokes (Gary). Anyone standing next to him feels
obligated to say, “I didn‟t do it.”

The other is an equally freakish eggshell-eyed figure (Miss Guy).

To make a “tentagatnet,” always cross the spikes before you pup
the tent.

Five Locations.
A cottage (with bedrooms on either side, one of which includes an
oval mirror) built into a mountainside inhabited by The Dials. It
has a patio in front and a place for a tent (elevated) behind.
The Supermarket
A Pup Tent, a two-person army tent.
A hammock tent, suspended between two trees.
A decaying 400 square foot trailer home covered in plastic white
siding inhabited by Joralmon, Dot, Gary and Guy.

A conservative couple confronts their mirror radicals when they
accidentally cross the spikes of the an army surplus pup tent out
back, turning it into a TentagatneT !!!

--------------------------
SCENE ONE
Saturday Evening, 10PM.

Demonic groans emanate from a motion picture projector as
Gorman and Orma sit in front of a screen, eating popcorn,
watching a film on a patio. The groans fluctuate.

ORMA
What are we watching?


Page 2, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
GORMIN
It‟s a mystery reel. I‟m sorry. I‟ll turn it off.

He rises,

ORMA
Hurry!

GORMIN
OK.

Shuts off the projector

GORMIN
Sorry.

And returns to her.

ORMA
Your life is infested with the occult. Yet when I give you a book
about spiritualism you don‟t read it. It doesn‟t hold your interest,
why, because there‟s no fetish in it.

GORMIN
I disagree. There‟s just no story in it.

ORMA
Someday you‟ll see beyond story to the reality in a spiritual
journey. Unfortunately it may not be in this lifetime.

GORMIN
There‟s no question we‟re on a spiritual journey. It‟s Saturday
night. Do we want to go out?

ORMA

Page 3, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
We need to go to the supermarket.

GORMIN
That‟ll be the second time today.

ORMA
But we need water and cat food! I‟ll go.

GORMIN
I‟ll come.

ORMA
Give me a minute to freshen up.

GORMIN
It‟s just the supermarket.

ORMA (in front of an oval mirror)
It is the new supermarket.

GORMIN
So new, that its newness stands as a testament to urban sprawl,
covering the footprint of the neighborhood playhouse they tore
down to build it. It was a regional theatre with a stately entrance
you could drive through. Remember, it had a restaurant, a cabaret?
When someone asks, “Where‟s the theatre?” they should always
say, Aisles 10 through 50.

ORMA
Help me with this clasp.

GORMIN
That‟s a beautiful cocktail dress. You look great. I‟ll get my
jacket. It‟s Saturday night. Let‟s go to the supermarket!


Page 4, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
They drive down their hill and pull into the supermarket.

ORMA
Always pick up the circular.

GORMIN
OK. Let‟s see. Buy three frozen pizzas; get the fourth free. It‟s so
confusing.

ORMA (Pointing left)
The frozen pizzas are in that direction.

GORMIN
Focus. We need water and cat food.

ORMA (Pointing right)
That‟s in the opposite direction.

They enter an aisle.

GORMIN
Look at all these light bulbs.

ORMA
Focus.

Orma walks to the end of the aisle and turns out of sight.

GORMIN
I‟m focusing on which 300 watt outdoor vita-light to set my claws
upon.

As Gormin remains transfixed by the light bulb boxes, he catches a
visual fluctuation out of the corner of his eye.


Page 5, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
GORMIN
What a creepy hooded spectre! Orma, did you see what just
passed? Orma, Where are you?

He walks to the edge of the aisle.

GORMIN
Oh, she‟s talking to her.

Gorman observes Orma answering the question of a hooded figure
pushing a shopping cart.

Another observer gazes furtively through the store window.

ORMA
Cleaning supplies? This aisle has gourmet-cleaning supplies with
pink grapefruit, ginger and essential oils. You want ordinary
cleaning supplies. Bleach and ammonia. Those are at the other
end of the store. You can‟t mix the two, you know.

SONG: HOLD ON

DOT
Which two?

ORMA
Bleach and ammonia. You can‟t mix them.

DOT
I thought you could.

ORMA
Who told you that?

DOT

Page 6, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
My boyfriend.

ORMA
Is he crazy? Does he want to kill you? The fumes are lethal.

DOT
I‟ve been doing it for a month.

ORMA
How do you feel?

DOT
Like I have a headache.

ORMA
It‟s no wonder. You can‟t do that. Let me see your list. Not a
healthy thing on it.

DOT
He‟s been acting strangely.

ORMA
Maybe it‟s time you talked about it. When do you see him?

DOT
He visits me in the night. He leaves before dawn.

ORMA
May I ask your name?

DOT
It‟s Dot.

ORMA
My name is Orma. Take off your hood, Dot.

Page 7, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Dot reveals herself to Orma only.

ORMA
He‟s a monster. You‟re not going back there. (To Gormin) She‟s
coming with us. She‟s never going back there.

DOT
But he‟s waiting outside.

ORMA
Gormin, get the car.

GORMIN
What did she say? Is she ever going to take off that cloak?

ORMA
Let‟s just get her home.


------
SCENE TWO opens with a knocking on the door. It is the next
morning. Gormin and Orma enter from one side, Dot, still hooded,
enters from the other.

SPECIAL DELIVERY
Special Delivery!

ORMA, opening the door, receiving a box.
Thank you. It‟s for you, Gormin. You‟re always ordering these
trashy auction items.

GORMIN
This is different.


Page 8, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
ORMA
It looks like another army cot. That last cot had a discolored green
canvas. Someone peed in that cot. It‟s a far cry from the white
Shabby Chic cot with the lace and pink fabric we saw at the store.

GORMIN
I love how it folded out. Those double jointed elbows! But you‟re
so right. That cot couldn‟t hold the weight of a body. It tore right
apart.

ORMA
It probably came from the trenches of Normandy.

GORMIN
It was more likely from Vietnam. Some fellow named Andy sold
it with his army blanket.

ORMA
I like the blanket. I washed it and laid it in the sun to dry.

GORMIN
Look at the canvas and these poles and spikes. This is the tent I
ordered, bringing the trenches of Normandy to the mountains of
Connecticut.

ORMA
Do you know how to assemble it?

GORMIN
I‟ll figure it out.

DOT
It‟s a pup tent. It‟s got to pup.



Page 9, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
ORMA
Good morning, Dot. Are you familiar with this?

DOT
I can figure it out.

GORMIN
I‟m sure I can figure it out.

ORMA
All right. Figure it out. I‟m going to the supermarket, and when I
get back I want to see that tent up.

GORMIN (standing beside her in front of the oval mirror)
But you never go out.

ORMA
We need our morning coffee. I‟ll be right back.

Orma exits. Gormin and Dot stand around for a few moments.

GORMIN
Shall we put up the tent?

DOT
Where?

GORMIN
Behind the house. I‟ll show you.

GORMIN
You take one end; I‟ll take the other. What are you doing with
your end?

DOT

Page 10, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
I‟m crossing the spikes.

GORMIN
I‟m just putting mine in straight at the entrance.

They lay down the canvas and poles, hammer in the spikes, pull up
the ends …

DOT
There. It pupped!

… And enter the tent, Gormin first, Dot pushing him forward.
They continue traveling into it past the end where the spikes are
crossed.

GORMIN
I don‟t think we can go any farther.

DOT
There‟s still room. I think we can.

As Gormin and Dot twist to accommodate the canvas “twist
point,” they flatten into two dimensions and come out the other
side.

DOT
Joralmon!

GORMIN
Who‟s that?

DOT
My boyfriend. He sleeps alone in a tent like yours in the back of
our home.


Page 11, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
GORMIN
What is he doing?

DOT
He spends too much time alone.

GORMIN
Let‟s get out of here. Back up. Would you?

They exit through the open flaps.

GORMIN
Un pup the tent, please. Release the far end. I‟ll release this one.

The tent collapses and flattens to the ground.

SCENE THREE In the cottage.

DOT
Do you suppose your wife will ever come back to you?

GORMIN
I think so. She's getting coffee. We need a grocery list like yours.

DOT
My boyfriend made me that, for us and our friends. They must be
starving now.

GORMIN
Why weren‟t they helping you?

DOT
They look too weird to go in there.

GORMIN

Page 12, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Yet they sent you in, with a hood!

DOT
Yes.

GORMIN
And your car is still in the parking lot?

DOT
There is no car. We live across the river.

GORMIN
Is there a river?

DOT
It‟s a stream with a plank bridge leading to our trailer. I should go
back there.

GORMIN
Let‟s wait „til Orma comes home.

DOT
He‟ll be here soon.

GORMIN
Let him come.

DOT
OK.


SCENE FOUR. Orma returns with the coffee. Gormin is pacing
the living room.



Page 13, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
ORMA
Where‟s Dot?

GORMIN
Welcome home. She‟s upstairs doing a jigsaw puzzle, waiting for
you.

ORMA
What did you do to her?

GORMIN
Nothing. Not only don‟t you and I do anything but I didn‟t do
anything to her either.

ORMA
That‟s not what I meant, but your answer speaks volumes. You
have no empathy for what she‟s been through.

GORMIN
I‟ll say.

ORMA
I‟ll see that you never have children.

GORMIN
Harsh words.

ORMA
Then contradict me, which you never do. Did she take off her
hood?

GORMIN
No.

ORMA

Page 14, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
All right, I‟ll make breakfast. Then we‟ll see about that tent of
yours.

GORMIN
Great!

DOT
I‟m going now.

ORMA
No. You must stay. You‟re getting better.

GORMIN
Yes. Stay. Later when it‟s dark I‟ll set up the projector and we‟ll
screen a movie on the patio.

DOT
If I stay much longer he‟s going to come for me.

ORMA
Then you and I will go to the supermarket and let Gormin deal
with him.

DOT
Could we?

GORMIN
Go ahead. I‟ll be fine.

SCENE FIVE
Later that day.

There is a knock on the door. Gormin rises to open it.

GORMIN

Page 15, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
You must be Dot‟s boyfriend.

JORALMON
And you‟re the husband of the woman who took her from me.

GORMIN
My wife is out.

JORALMON
I saw them leave, going to the supermarket, I imagine.

GORMIN
Do you remember when it used to be a theatre?

JORALMON
I was head carpenter in the prop room.

GORMIN
What happened when they shut it down?

JORALMON
My life began a new chapter.

GORMIN
But I get the feeling you knew Dot since childhood.

JORALMON
Yes. She's always been with me, helping, guiding me, even when
my lack of imagination and dependence upon sex fueled the joy in
my life. While I worked at the theatre my life consisted of
carpentry and sex.

GORMIN
What got you out of that rut?


Page 16, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
JORALMON
It was no rut, as long as I placed the achievement of my pleasure
into the hands of others, giving them helpers‟ high.

GORMIN
What a short-sighted super imposition!

JORALMON
Fool. It‟s your duty to superimpose yourself upon your
community. When I withdrew into solitude, the next thing I knew
they had knocked down my theatre to build there a supermarket!

GORMIN
Maybe we humans should eliminate the animal drive altogether.

JORALMON
We can subsume it, but never eliminate it.

GORMIN
Yet some of us insist upon having our mates mix bleach with
ammonia.

JORALMON
First we use bleach, then ammonia, to clean up after the
incontinence of our guests.

GORMIN
Guests?

JORALMON
I am not alone. I still have friends.

GORMIN
Disenfranchised, incontinent friends.


Page 17, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
JORALMON
Not Dot. While other‟s left, she stayed with me. Damn that
supermarket. We‟d been holding out from going there ever since
they tore down our theatre to build it, but as our grocery list grew
their promotional enticements became more radical, until finally I
turned to Dot. I said, "Here's a list of want-items. Go in and come
out with them." Then you came along. Dressed like you were
attending some charity ball.

GORMIN
My wife elevates an experience by preparing herself for it.

JORALMON
Sounds like a good woman; naturally Dot turned to her for
guidance. And I had to just stand by the window and watch it
happen.

GORMIN
Come in. Sit down. Let‟s wait for them inside. Can I get you
something? I have no idea what‟s here except for my film
collection. It‟ll be dark soon. I‟ll set up the screen. Do you want
to stay and watch a film?

JORALMON
Not much of an offer. How about a glass of water?

GORMIN
Right away. And there‟s juice, too. Plenty. They had the three for
two special at the…. I‟m sorry.

JORALMON
You‟re a film collector?

GORMIN
I pick up remainder stuff and pretend it‟s rare treasure.

Page 18, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
JORALMON
Hoarding sublimates the animal drive.

GORMIN
So long as there is purity. An infestation of the occult is
destroying from within my most precious film collection.

JORALMON
Really? That sounds like it could draw high bids at auction, and
there are sure to be re-sales, as ultimately no one wants such
cursed items in their home. Are you a designated collector?

GORMIN
No. I‟ve never been so designated.

JORALMON
Then I can communicate with you as an individual, as a friend, as
an ally.

GORMIN
Well, I collect film.

JORALMON
But is it correct to say that you have never been designated a film
collector?

GORMIN
It is correct. Why does it matter?

JORALMON
You see, I am a designated collector, and if you look, you will find
me accused of certain crimes against collecting, basically, I enter
homes and steal their film collections, break up the complete ones
and individually sell each title. So, if it ever came out that I was

Page 19, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
communicating instructions to a member of a designated collector
group then the people allowing this meeting, your wife and my
girlfriend, would be facilitators. They would be charged, and the
charges would be serious. They would stick.

GORMIN
Is there a conspiracy here that will cause blame to fall upon Orma
or Dot for bringing us together? I don‟t think so. You‟re
uncapping my need to talk. I have a problem in my heart, which
you may be able to shed light upon. When they get back I‟ll report
to Orma that you‟re an OK fellow and that this hooded thing with
your girlfriend was the result of a misunderstanding.

JORALMON
Are you listening to what I‟m saying?

GORMIN
I think so. Ever since you lost your job as a prop builder you‟ve
fallen into the practice of stealing a family‟s film collection. Why?
They‟re just private collections for the family to enjoy together in
their homes. Would that there were children here to enjoy mine,
but knowing what she does about me, my wife does not allow us to
have children.

JORALMON
Then why did she marry you?

GORMIN
To keep others safe from me.

JORALMON
Are you a sex offender?

GORMIN
Let‟s say that I have used sex to offend.

Page 20, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
JORALMON
It‟s getting dark. We haven‟t much time. Let‟s see the tent you
have out back.

GORMIN
Oh, yes. Come on.

They go out back.

JORALMON
The tent is down. No wonder I had to walk here.

GORMIN
Shall we raise it?

JORALMON
Yes. Raise it the way you did with my Dot.

GORMIN
Take an end.

JORALMON
How does this work?

GORMIN
We place the canvases so they lie flat upon the ground with the
poles under them. Then we take these spikes and hammer them at
the points of a tetragrammaton.

JORALMON
A “tetragrammaton?” You are obsessed with my girlfriend.

GORMIN
I‟ve only seen her hood.

Page 21, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
JORALMON
I‟m beginning to understand how your mind works.

GORMIN
You‟ve assessed my intelligence so low as to be incapable of
remembering big words unless I was in the throes of obsession.
Fair enough.

JORALMON
Rather, I understand your obsession to be presentational. You are a
cool calculator, sir. You‟ve already done the groundwork, here,
wedging spikes into dirt. Now let‟s pup this tent.

GORMIN
I suddenly feel that we have we done this before, a long time ago.

JORALMON
In the interest of time I‟m not going to address that. Where do
these spikes go?

GORMIN
The crossed spikes go here. Wedge them, and then pull. There.
Here‟s a candle. You can go inside, but not too far.

JORALMON
I had never interest to go beyond its parameters.

GORMIN
Until now?

JORALMON
Until now.

GORMIN

Page 22, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
With the ground free of impurity, we say, “YodHeeWadee.” Say
it.

JORALMON
You are obsessed with my girlfriend!

Pup. They look inside.

JORALMON
I see it. You were in here with Dot, and you were necking!

GORMIN
No. That‟s you we see.

JORALMON
Where?

GORMIN
There, through the twist point!

DOT
Okay?

JORALMON
I‟m appallingly grateful to you.

DOT
Was it me or my ointment?

JORALMON
Please accept my most appalling gratitude. Get up.

DOT
I‟m in no position to do so. I am too wounded by your violent
lashes of gratitude.

Page 23, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
JORALMON
I, too, am wounded by our dependence on a depleted supply of
canned goods. You must leave here at once. Here‟s money, and a
shawl. Go to the supermarket and come back with the items on
this list.

GORMIN
Do you see?

JORALMON
I see you with Dot.

DOT
What are you going to do to me in here? You‟re not an ax
murderer, are you?

GORMIN
No.

DOT
You‟re not going to do anything to me, now that you‟ve gotten me
alone with you in this tent?

GORMIN
Nothing untoward. Since you think me a pervert, I cannot go near
you.

DOT
But you are a pervert.

GORMIN
Why?

DOT

Page 24, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
You prefer what you are too embarrassed to have.

GORMIN
I‟m embarrassed by what arouses me.

DOT
How miserable is that?

GORMIN
On a scale of one to ten I‟d say three. Rather than fear the loss of
happiness, I maintain a steady low-grade state of misery.

DOT
Happiness creates its own momentum.

GORMIN
Misery does, too. And as we‟re on a mountainside, its slope, too,
creates its own momentum.

DOT (fists raised)
Do you roll with the punches?

GORMIN
Yes. Better to be buffeted than suffer the pain of happiness lost.

DOT
There‟s a time in a month when my thought is fogged, when
happiness repels. Everything upsets me as I await the storm‟s end.

GORMIN
And when it does?

DOT
Don‟t even talk about it. You‟ve seen, haven‟t you? The larvae
frosting the tree trunks hatch and the flying worms infest the air,

Page 25, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
filling my mouth, surrounding my head, so I walk face covered.
The swarm subsides when I reach a wall on which sits a preemie
baby with a long finger.

GORMIN
I‟ve seen him.

DOT
Had he stuck his finger in his mouth?

GORMIN
Yes, and it was choking him.

DOT
And did you step away?

GORMIN
No. I just stood there and watched until people accused me
upsetting him.

DOT
I couldn‟t help him without further compromising my reputation so
I stepped away.

GORMIN
I never see him now.

DOT
No. He‟s receiving good care. These are just dreams, dreams I
dream every night. I dreamt about a guy, a Miss Guy, her family
calling her to come downstairs for a visit. She wore a burka as she
appeared before me, as I kneeled at her feet, talking only of
myself, until I noticed that her eyes were covered in glass and that
one of them was pure white.


Page 26, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
GORMIN
Guy?

DOT
Miss Guy. You don‟t see her wandering around town anymore.

GORMIN
Why not?

DOT
She‟s also getting good care. She lives with us.

GORMIN
And the boy with the long finger?

DOT
He also lives with us, too. He‟s our friend, Gary.

GORMIN
What do you and your boyfriend do for privacy?

DOT
Guy‟s nearly blind, Gary is colic and we don‟t need privacy. Only
Joralmon does when he needs to be alone. He keeps a tent behind
our trailer, very much like yours.

JORALMON (aside)
She tells you too much.

GORMIN (to Joralmon)
Nothing happened. My wife knows better than anyone, in
registering the passion of my hugs, I‟m homosexual.

DOT (overhearing)
Why does she think that?

Page 27, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
GORMIN
We haven‟t made love in a year.

JORALMON
Isn‟t it time you tried?

GORMIN
Now it‟s too late. She won‟t let me. Is that her?

From outside the tent.

ORMA (carrying a heavy object)
I use this purifying incense censer for mosquito repellant. The
vessel of bronze! Live coal from the sacred fire on the altar of
burnt-offering. I will put it inside the tent.

Coughing from within.

JORALMON
What is she doing?

GORMIN
Purifying.

JORALMON
Has she been inside?

GORMIN
No. Not until it‟s purified.

JORALMON
Bring her in the tent. I‟ll wait on the other side, on my side. Don‟t
take down the tent again! And get that censer out of here!


Page 28, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Gormin exits the tent holding the censer.

GORMIN
Hi, Orma. What‟s with this censer?

ORMA
I thought you might like it with you to keep away bugs.

GORMIN
Very thoughtful. Very smoky. Let‟s leave it out here.

ORMA
Look at the lights blinking in the twilight, beckoning one another.

GORMIN
They‟re fireflies.

ORMA
The males fly. The females sit on leaves. The smaller females are
maters. The larger females are predators. I‟m sorry. That hurt
you.

GORMIN
I‟m fine with that.

ORMA
The predators mimic the maters. The males don‟t know what
they‟ll encounter when they land. Sometimes you have to trust
your instinct. We hold for each other the power of life and death.
In that way we are each other‟s gods.

GORMIN
I suppose.

ORMA

Page 29, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Blinking lights in the dark direct us.

GORMIN
The female fireflies must have a similar problem, ever asking
themselves, are we eaters or maters?

ORMA
I‟m more upset to see a woman, or worse, an animal, than a man,
fooled to its death. Men are naturally more dangerous, with
greater potential to kill. Women are naturally nurturing and
motherly. And animals, of course, are pure love.

GORMIN
I suppose a woman could be gored by the tusk.

ORMA
Blinking lights attract men; women, tusks? Is that what you're
saying? That's not funny. There‟s another possibility, that some of
the blinking lights are fairies. Oh, I forgot. You don‟t believe in
fairies.

GORMIN
They could as easily be fireflies. Let's go in the tent.

ORMA
All right.

They go in.

ORMA
Ooo. In here we could easily be anywhere.

A moment of intimacy, and then…

GORMIN (upset)

Page 30, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
In here it‟s easier to hear the noise outside. Listen to the pounding
music. There‟s a party and we‟re missing it. Let‟s investigate.

ORMA
All right. I‟d say you have one or two agreements left in me
before your credibility is completely shot again.

They go out.

ORMA
The revelers are not of our world.

GORMIN
Can you tell?

ORMA
They don‟t even comprehend that we‟re here. Don‟t alert them
with your fear.

GORMIN
Everyone is ignoring us. It‟s too dangerous. Let‟s go inside.
Come on, Orma.

They return into the tent.

ORMA
Listen!

GORMIN
What.

ORMA
That‟s Dot‟s voice outside the tent among the chatter. She‟s
arguing with someone!


Page 31, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
GORMIN
It must be her boyfriend.

JORALMON
Let me be your mother. I want to be more motherly.

DOT
You can‟t. You‟re a man. Go out and work for us!

JORALMON
I‟ll take care. I‟m a mother, too.

DOT
No, you're not. You're a killer. Go hunt, and bring home bacon so
we can buy bread.

JORALMON
Can‟t your parents help out?

DOT
No.

JORALMON
With this house?

DOT
It‟s a trailer. We have to move this house. We could have bought
the land for peanuts when the theatre was still standing. We could
have afforded it then, but now that it is worth plenty we‟re in no
position to buy it.

JORALMON
Let‟s leave this party to disassemble and liquidate. The assets.
Maybe we could obtain a rare complete collection to split and sell


Page 32, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
in parcels. Here‟s money. Go to the supermarket and come back
with the items on this list.

From inside the tent.

ORMA
Shall we go to the supermarket?

GORMIN
I can see yesterday as though it were today. In a quiet rural town,
over the footprint of the summer stock playhouse, the hooded girl
was walking through the city-block long supermarket aisle,
carrying her list of provisions for the group back home, the fellows
who sent her on this outing. Although the paper was trailing
behind her as she pushed her cart forward, and the cart was nearing
overflow, she was capable. She would handle it.

ORMA
I didn‟t see the paper.

GORMIN
But you saw her so swaddled. What face was hidden beneath her
hood and ball cap? Your connection was empathic. Before we
married, you had been enamored of such a fellow as this one was,
ready to carry out his every assignment, follow his every
instruction, and anticipate his every need.

ORMA
I only told you that after you insisted upon talking about your own
past.

GORMIN
Now, as cuddly as you are, you are hitched to a man who doesn‟t
like to be touched, who gooses tightly in snaps and pops, whose


Page 33, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
workings fear exposure to the light, and who stands in the aisle
wondering about the hooded girl.

ORMA
If I knew, I wouldn‟t have married you, but I did know and I did
marry, because I‟m a magical thinker. Gormin, don‟t deny my
magical thinking. Get the car. She‟s coming with us.

GORMIN
Orma, please leave her.

ORMA
Not after what she told me. Not after what I know about you. I‟m
only just discovering how unkind you‟ve been to yourself by the
existence you maintain for yourself.

DOT
Gormin, front and center. Come out of the tent and report to me.

Gormin exits the tent.

ORMA
And there you go, putting others before me. Leaving me alone in
here.

DOT (voice over)
What do you do for a living?

GORMIN
I‟m a film collector. I think they‟re fabulously valuable.

DOT (voice over)
Where do you keep your films?

GORMIN

Page 34, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
In a closet, in a tinderbox. Every Sunday I pull one and project it
on a screen outdoors.

JORALMON (to Orma)
Are you hearing them? What is she doing with him?

ORMA
I didn‟t realize how far back this tent goes. Who are you?

JORALMON
Shhh.

Outside

GORMIN
It was my choice to make love, head-on, with my eyes open. I was
not up for the challenge that floodgate released.

(from inside)

ORMA
That is because you have no connection with your body.

JORALMON
Shhh.

GORMIN (to the tent)
And I don‟t appreciate your pandering to my disagreeableness, as
though I‟m the boss‟s son and you‟re escorting me for the night.
My fulfillment of arousal translates into a ravishment of you. I
take from the naked. I give to the covered. Don‟t leave me alone
with the willing.

ORMA


Page 35, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
The meeting of the antithetical twain can result in pure love and
compassion.

JORALMON
Why are you trying to have a relationship with that man? He
clearly doesn‟t want your help, or you. Try this instead.

ORMA
What is it?

JORALMON
A happy pill. It chemically opens the receptors of happiness
naturally opened when someone loves you.

ORMA
Thank you. Where may I find more of these?

JORALMON
I will find you. (pushing his way out of the tent) Excuse me.

Joralmon exits and joins Gormin, who is standing beside the tent,
alone.

JORALMON
You and your wife have something to work out between you, and I
can help.

GORMIN (motioning)
Here they come now, driving up the driveway.

JORALMON
That‟s your wife?

GORMIN
Yes. I know. She is exquisite. Excuse me.

Page 36, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
ORMA
Put back your hood. Don‟t let my husband see you.

SONG: LET YOUR LIFE BEGIN

GORMIN
Dot. Would you go outside for a moment? I have something to
say to Orma and there‟s someone out there who wants to speak
with you.

DOT
I‟m coming.

GORMIN
Orma, Dot‟s boyfriend is outside.

ORMA
What did you make of him?

GORMIN
He‟s running the drug trade here.

ORMA
I don‟t think so.

GORMIN
No. He‟s a better man than that. He calls himself a film salesman.

From outside.

JORALMON
Let's party, play loud music.



Page 37, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
GORMIN
Let‟s have a quiet evening at home by the fire. I‟m going to set up
the movie screen.

ORMA
Forget it. Your credibility is shot. Everywhere I look I see cult.
Your mind is infested with the occult. You are too cowardly to get
what you want so you got me. No one has any idea how sunken
into damnation you'd fallen before commencing this marriage
charade.

GORMIN
I think they knew.

MUSIC OUTDOORS GROWS LOUDER, APPROACHING THE
COTTAGE.

GORMIN
People are coming. We can't hide much longer. Slingers looking
to do a life swap infest this mountain.

From outside.

JORALMON
Dot, what did you do?

DOT
I turned his tent into a tentagatnet so that we could subdivide and
liquidate his collection.

ORMA
Gorman, what did you do?

GORMIN


Page 38, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
I relieved us of the stewardship of our possessions, as they had
been infected by the virus of the occult.

ORMA
A burnt offering can deactivate the curse.

GORMIN
I‟m just going to prune the trees. I must climb them. They‟re self
strangling with growth.

ORMA
There you go, putting gods others before me. Leaving me alone in
here.

Outside.

GORMIN
Dot, I'm so glad to see you. We were in the middle of an
interview.

DOT
Oh yeah. The stages of human development, how far along the
stages are you?

GORMIN
I‟m just a clerk on the corner, drawing a paycheck, an angry little
man, riding and hiding in the coattails of the proprietor.

DOT
Skills?

GORMIN
Pruning. Most activities bore me. I‟m functioning at a low level.
I just want to prune.


Page 39, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
DOT
First Million?

GORMIN
No.

DOT
Married?

GORMIN
Yes.

DOT
Children?

GORMIN
No.

DOT
Property owner?

GORMIN
Joint owner of our little house built into the mountain in the „30s.

DOT
Lifespan?

GORMIN
I don‟t know.

DOT
Accomplishments?

GORMIN
I don‟t know. I‟m not very far along the path.

Page 40, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
DOT
Why am I compelled to speak with you?

GORMIN
Because you recognize my fetishes for what they are. I‟m not
really interested in you as a person. I don‟t care whether you never
take off that hood. You fulfill my fetish as you are. Is there any
value in my life? Maybe there is value in my possessions, but how
will I know until I sell them? Looks like I‟ll never have fun again.
I upset my wife. Her feelings? No I don‟t consider them. I just
want her to be with me and be herself. Our temperaments clash. I
can‟t make a clean break in closing the conversation. I‟m not quite
admitting how I feel to her or me. I love her and want to be with
her. We accuse each other constantly. Because I‟m not honest
with myself. That‟s no way to prosper.

DOT
Gormin, enough! Please grant me license to depart.

GORMIN
Take this disk. Give it to the man at the door. He‟ll let you
through.

SPECIAL DELIVERY
Special Delivery!

ORMA
The package is quite light.

GORMIN
This is a hammock tent. No poles or spikes. It ties between two
trees.

JORALMON

Page 41, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
This is perfect. Set it between the two trees.

DOT
Now twist. There, a perfect tentagatnet



(                               )    .


Are you prepared to go in?

GORMIN
I‟ll take the candles.

ORMA
I‟ll take the fuming incense censer.

GORMIN
Orma? Back up.

ORMA
No. Go forward.

GORMIN
I can‟t.

JORALMON
Are you prepared to go through its twist point and out the other
side?

GORMIN
Yes.

ORMA


Page 42, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Yes.

DOT and JORALMON
Done.

DOT
Let‟s sell off everything and get out of here.

JORALMON
I think that worked well. Congratulations, “Orma.”

Gormin and Orma are happy to be relieved of their collections.

GORMIN and ORMA
We felt relief when we went through the crossed canvas at the
twist point!

DOT
The twist point is where the three dimensions fuse into a two
dimensional flat surface film strip.

JORALMON
Two options -- decide. Too many options -- no decision.
Cheers, “Orma.” Raise your glass to the new transcendentalist.
As the fairies appear in the morning mist.

DOT
They went through the twist point.

The two couples exit the other end of the tent.

GORMAN
I‟m taking Dot home.

ORMA

Page 43, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Yes I think that‟s best.

JORALMON
Are you sure you don‟t want to stay and see a movie on my
projector.

GORMAN
Another time.

JORALMON
All right. But don‟t be strangers.

DOT
See you at the supermarket! Don‟t go mixing bleach and
ammonia.

ORMA
Oh, we won‟t.

Gorman and Orma exit.

JORALMON
Okay, “Orma,” what did you do?

DOT
I don‟t know. Something‟s wrong with that tent.

JORALMON
Let‟s waste no time liquidating their assets so we can take the
money and run. We‟ll break up the collection and sell each piece
individually for the most profit. Get to work taking inventory.
What‟s this mystery reel?

DOT
I don‟t know.

Page 44, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
JORALMON
Load it into the projector and let‟s see what it is.

Demonic groans emanate from the movie projector.

JORALMON
Oh, please take this off.

DOT
I‟m enjoying it a lot.

JORALMON
I feel so powerless sitting here.

DOT
Then go back in time and save them.
--------------------------------
GORMIN
Hi, kids. We‟re home.

ORMA
Poor Gary, always catching colds because of his undeveloped
internal organs

GORMIN
He‟s doing fine. Look at those fingers. He‟s gonna be great.

ORMA
And poor Guy, nearly blind with her eggshell eyes.

GORMIN
Gary, Guy, I know we said we had to move, but guess what, we‟re
staying.


Page 45, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
ORMA
The only thing that‟s going from here is this plastic white siding.
Let‟s see the wood rotting underneath.

GORMIN
With your help we‟re going to make this trailer the nicest country
cottage you‟d ever want to live in.

ORMA
Darling. Look at Gary and Guy. How can you not protect these
pure innocent creatures?

GORMIN
I love them, in all their misbegotten glory. Now let‟s get to work.

JORALMON
Nothing, nothing of value here. It‟s all trash!

DOT
Settle in. These films are our vortex into another world.

(collective groans and moans.)




Page 46, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Words as a weapon in a cowardly way.
They go together like bleach and ammonia.
I‟ve erected a tent in the back. It is silent and haunted. I smell
something independent within. There is a God. Emotions run
rampant, as we say, more than we should, as we overstep social
boundaries, passions trumping self-awareness.

SPECIAL DELIVERY
Special Delivery!

Night of the long rope.

GORMIN
I ordered a long rope, nylon with fortifying gold flecks. Bow and
arrow, attach it to an arrow. Catapult it with a bow. Loop it
around a tree branch. The suspended acrobat wraps it with her
foot. In order for ordinary climbers to use it, we tie knots in the
rope. I love this long rope.

ORMA
You should buy from a reputable dealer. What if there‟s a defect
in that rope.




Page 47, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010
Page 48, The TentagatneT by Peter Dizozza for La MAMA Experiments 05 -- 3/16/2010

				
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