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Adat perkahwinan masyarakat melayu sarawak

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									                                                                        Universiti Malaysia Sarawak 1
                                                                      Introduction to Social Science




        Malaysia represents one of the countries that have more culture and society. Every
culture consist of an own community. Malaysia have a community such as Malay, Chinese,
Indian, Iban, Bidayuh, Kenyah and so on. In society that have community like farmer,
fisherman, rubber and others. What i want to explain here is a about Malay community from
aspect culture or economy. Culture and economy is a two of aspect that interacts with each
other. About culture i will to explain about Malay marriage custom. Every marriage custom is
difference in other society or culture. Such as Chinese society has their own custom also
Indian society. Not just for that culture or society but the other society like iban , Bidayuh,
and all the other culture at Sarawak especially.

        The family institution in Malaysia bound by customary low, especially, Malay
society. In Malay society, marriage is a way to marry off or to combine between male and
female with legal. Without a legal relationship they were cannot stay together and have sex.
Marriage means an institution of being wed, wedlock or ceremony in which a man and
woman are legally joined together.

        Malay society is to emphasize about custom in marriage. Start from investigate until
“akad nikah” to reception event. However, most of Malay societies now especially adolescent
get marriage without to go against custom. For example, pregnancy before marriage.
Marriage can separate by two categories that is by own choice or choosing by parent. The
first step common by someone in marriage process is investigated. This occurs when the guys
attracted to someone girl they not recognize. And at the same time he wants to get marriage
with that girl.

        For this purpose, someone needs to be representative. They must consist of
trustworthy elderly women. An investigate done to get the information about the lady that
they want to get marriage. This is how to know either the lady already have a couple or not,
to know about moral, attitude, behaviour and so on. The representative also wants to know
about her religion education. To other people, family background also important while they
want to find wife. Sometime, the representative will visit to the ladies house like common
guest without explain about their true coming purpose. Refer to the elderly advice, if during
representative arrive at the ladies house, at the same time she still to bathe, this is a good sign.
The ladies are „suitable‟ with the guy that want make she as a wife.
                                                                      Universiti Malaysia Sarawak 2
                                                                    Introduction to Social Science




       After they get all information and the man side satisfied with lady and her family
condition, the next step is propose ceremony. This ceremony done by man side to express
their aim as formal. Normally, the result from ladies side will not informed at that time
because the parent side need to discuss with the ladies and her closely relative. The ladies
side with their own way will try to get the information about that guy.

       After the propose being accepted, engagement custom will conduct at the time that
have been agree by the bridegroom. In this custom, the „tepak sirih‟ is a main passing that
giving by man side to ladies side. Among the passing good that bought by the man side is
“sirih junjung” with ring, “bunga rampai”, traditional cake, fruit and so on. Every kind of
passing put in the „pahar‟ that mean metal pedestal tray. Basically, the quantity of passing is
negative number. May be in total 5,7,9,11..... Those also depend on man side ability.

       When the marriage proposal being accepted, other thing must to discuss especially
engagement duration, total amount of passing good and agreement. Basically, the total
amount of marriage spend determine by lady side. Sometime the total amount of marriage
spend depend on ladies site like her education or job. The higher of her education or job,
hence the total amount of marriage spend will more expensive. There also, whereby the man
side request the total amount being decrease. Besides, after the engagement being accepted,
the ring will put in the lady right finger by someone from the man side relative. During that
period, both of them do not stay together until they become a legal spouse.

       Now, i want to explain about the preparation before wedding day. Normally,
„bangsal‟ was build a day before the ceremony heals. „Bangsal‟ mean canopy. While the man
busy to arrange the canopy, the ladies busy to make a bridal dais and „bunga telur‟ . „Bunga
telur‟ is one of the gifts for the guest who attend the ceremony. Egg is one of the essential
things in the Malay wedding culture.

       „Pulut kunyit‟ also called yellow glutinous rice also one of things that necessarily in
wedding ceremony. Yellow colour is a symbol of royalty. A feast that prepared to the guest is
something that needs to emphasize. The feast depends to the people who prepare by
themselves, that refer to the concept and views how they considered that wedding ceremony.
At the certain places, especially at the rural area, the relationships among the family are close.
                                                                       Universiti Malaysia Sarawak 3
                                                                     Introduction to Social Science




The preparation in wedding ceremony done by „gotong-royong‟ whereby they work together.

        The person who make a important role in this ceremony is „mak andam‟ or „pak
andam‟. Their task is to make up the bridegroom. „Mak andam‟ duty is start a day before
„bersanding‟ day. „Bersanding‟ is the ceremony whereby the bridegroom sits together on the
bridal dais. The important things that need to be prepared including „kain putih‟(white cloth),
lime, small scissors, shaver, comb, „air semangkuk‟, and powder, „sirih‟(betel leaf), 7 types of
flower and so on. Next, the important part of the wedding ceremony is to make-over the bride
by the „mak andam‟.

        The ceremony started when the „mak andam‟ put the white cloth into the bride‟s
shoulder to cover her body. „Sirih‟ that had been magic spell by the „mak andam‟ will be
given to the bride. All this ritual aim to raise a bride face outlook. After that the special flour
called „tepung tawar‟ are sprinkle surround the bride      to avoid the bad things. The second
stage is shaving custom. Before start, „mak andam‟ will read the incantation or pray while
massages and spin the baby hair near the forehead and cutting it. That hair will fall down on
the white cloth. If the hair mess up, that mean the bride is not virgin anymore. But if the hair
still in a good condition that mean she still virgin.

        Another custom that still popular in malay wedding culture is „adat berinai‟(hennaed).
This event does not open to public. Hennaed done by a few day before wedding day. That
just to use by bride only. Actually, groom also hennas his finger but just only three fingers.
Sometime this custom done without „mak andam‟ accept rescue by their common friend.
Effect from that henna could be a sign that she recently gets marriage.

        Marriage contract is called „akad nikah‟.‟Akad nikah‟ is a most important compare
with other custom. There are two types of marriage. There are hang marriage (nikah gantung)
and normal marriage. „Nikah gantung‟(hang marriage) mean the marriage done without
wedding ceremony. Normal marriage is marriage that done with wedding ceremony. „Akad
nikah‟ done by „Tok Kadi‟. Usually, all program or marriage must do at bride house. The
„akad nikah‟ usually happen at night. But sometime that happen at morning and afternoon.
                                                                   Universiti Malaysia Sarawak 4
                                                                 Introduction to Social Science




       After „Akad nikah‟, the groom will enter to the bridegroom room. The bride already
waiting in the room. In this time both of bridegroom will shake hand whereby the bride kiss
the groom hand. Sometimes the groom will kiss his bride forehead before him leave the
room. This is called „adat membatalkan air sembahyang‟, that mean to invalidate the pray
water. It‟s happen as a symbol whereby from that time, they already being a legal
relationship.

       A big hennaed done after finished „akad nikah‟. A hennaed here is difference between
hennaed before „akad nikah‟. Certain places called that a „belulut‟. For this event, the bride
will dress up with beautiful clothes. The bride walks to go to the bridal dais and lagging by
groom. Before take the henna, that person or guest must take a bow their head as a symbol for
respect to the bridegroom. The bridegroom will reply respect whereby they will bow their
head. The bridegroom will catch both her hand on the thigh. After that, the person who wants
to henna the bridegroom can come to in front and take less turmeric and popcorn and
broadcast into the bridegroom.

       The total of people that was called to do this ceremony is using negative total. To end
up the ceremony, the pray will be read by imam or muezzin.

       Reception custom is the climax ceremony compare of the other ceremony before.
Because of that, the bride must be use with beautiful dress up and make up. Usually, the
event will start about 9 o‟clock in the morning. The groom and the entourage walk to go to
bride house. After the groom completely seated on bridal dais „menepung tawar‟ ceremony
started. During this ceremony people who attended invited forward to broadcast the turmeric
rice and popcorn to the bridegroom.

       Finally, both bridegroom will attend their relative in both side of the groom to
introduce their partner. In malay marriage institution there a lot of custom and believe
according to islam perspective.
                                                                     Universiti Malaysia Sarawak 5
                                                                   Introduction to Social Science




Reference


Bibliography
Kasimin, A. (1995). Istiadat Perkahwinan Melayu,Satu kajian perbandingan. Kuala Lumpur: Dewan
Bahasa Dan Pustaka .



Kamus Dewan Bahasa Dan Pustaka Edisi ke3

Babylon Dictionary in Computer

								
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