Everything that happens to you, becomes part of you. Before you do something, you’ve decided to do something. You decided to cross the river before you cross the river. You are made up of millions of things, ideas, actions, desires, experiences etc that places you in your own reality, right now. You cannot change anything you’ve already done. Everything that makes you is connected. All of these millions of connections make up the education, emotions and experiences that overlap or cover the real you. The real you is the physiology and psychology of you, those traits that god gave you without asking you. Nature does not play around and doesn't care about you, it just is.
There is no choice about your core. The real you was created for you. The best you can do is understand your traits and build from that point.
You can build your education, learn everything whether you believe it or not. Only you can control your thoughts. It’s a gift from your creator. Control your thoughts and you control your emotions. With your emotions in check, you are in control, you know the terms, Emotional Control. You cannot always control your experiences. As an adult you can control much of them. Your experiences are the reality check you use to measure things. If your experiences are wrong you measure wrong. Your emotions, education and experience layers, mixed with your core values make up the attitude you live with during your entire life.
Your mind always disagrees with itself, so it can quickly measure everything and come up with the best possible solution based on your core, emotions, education and experiences. Everything about you is mental. Your thoughts believe different things all the time until such time that you decide. If you do not have the education, experiences and emotions concerning a topic at hand you will most likely be wrong. This knowledge in conflict, thoughts in other words, behave just like people. pretending, arguing, threatening, sympathizing, forgiving, agreeing and disagreeing. You do this thousand of times per hour, 24 hours. You have organized yourself into groups that agree with your thinking. People move apart when they disagree and argue. Your mind started as a blank, except the core. You see things different than I do at times, it’s natural and expected. Some of your experiences make bigger impressions than others. Dramatic things leave marks on you, emotional and experience marks. Experience is the chalk that writes on your blank mind slate. PeopleNology Gregory Bodenhamer 2008
Worrying about the motives and intentions of other people can take its toll on you. Your own Emotional Intelligence has more of an impact on your success in life that your grades in school or your I.Q scores put together. You must have the ability to understand, and use, your emotions successfully. It involves a group of skills, including the ability to motivate ourselves, regulate our moods, control our impulses and empathize with others. Young people tend to fall for schemes, older people, wiser we hope, know better. Older people tend to control more and speculate less. They control their emotional triggers. As a child if you fall off a chair, you think, bad chair. If your mate hits you, you think, bad mate. You’ve been taught that bad things must be punished. You punish things that remind you of the things that hurt you, it’s instinctive.
If a dog bites you, you worry and watch all dogs. If your spouse hits you, you do not trust as you always measure and compare. You control your thoughts which control your actions. Your actions control your results.
Others - hold you back
Follower
YOU Leader
As this outer ring gets bigger and bigger you move away from the instinctive you and keep growing. This is where you may become fearful, afraid of change, loving another, you’re at the peak of your life and growing much faster. People living on the “edge” live strong and happy lives. Other people that live closer to the core instincts serve your life. Nature has no favorites. Other people with less emotional control, experiences and education do not want you to move to the outer edge, you’ll leave You can keep growing but you have to let go of your them. People want you the way that you fit past. You cannot live in the future and live in the past. into their range of goals.
The further you move out the more resilience you have, the ability to interact successfully with others and to solve problems. Leaders must lead. Leaders must have resilience. Leaders must live on the edge and never stop growing. Resilience is a life skill, allows you to bounce back from setbacks, these skills translate into certain thoughts, feelings and behaviors, ability to interact, ability to empower the optimistic outlook, ability to feel good regardless of what's going on around you.