US Satire - End of Horrific Journey from 911 to 119 by anilselarka


									End of Horrific Journey from 911 to 119
President Bush was having his last ride in the outer space with his trusted lieutenants Henry Paulson, the Treasury Secretary and Ben Bernanke, the Fed Chief. The plane just entered the earth orbit and started its downward journey. It was the complete reversal of fortune for him, and he regretted it. Oh where was 911 and now today, it is 119. The wheel has turned the full circle, he lamented. His Air Force One was his favorite. Alas, this will not be handy anymore. Even Obama would not use it. Looking down, he was appalled by the thick smoke surrounding the plane. Were they clouds, oh no, they were smokes. The earth may be warming up, he thought, thinking of Al Gore whom he narrowly defeated while assuming the Presidency eight years ago. He did not like Gore’s first name – Al. He was dreaded by the mere mention of “Al”; he always equated it with “Al Qaeda. “ Once he told even Al Gore during the Kyoto meeting, that he should change the name for good from Al Gore to something else. Mr. Gore confronted him – what do you suggest? Well, anything except “Al”. It has taken my life. He decided not to think of it any more. Instead, he started interacting with his two flamboyant soldiers – Pauly and Bernie. He liked them most. When he was a child, he was fascinated by the comic strip of Mutt and Jeff. He likened Henry Paulson or Pauly to lanky Mutt and Ben Bernanke to burly Jeff. Bush told both of them “You guys are terrific. You have been entertaining me at the White House all the time”. What I would be doing without them, he wondered. He was tired of signing condolence letters to the bereaved family of soldiers who sacrificed their lives for him at Iraq and Afghanistan. He therefore likened the idea of Paulson coming to his office at 8:00 AM every day with bunch of files tucked under his arm, waiting for his signatures. He had signed off $ 700 billions a few days before, but the Paulson was not satisfied. He was a trillion dollar man, not billion dollars.

This is how the conversation goes...

Anil Selarka©2009

Bush Last Journey to Earth – 911 to 119

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Bush : Pauly : Ben : Bush : Pauly ; Ben : Bush : Ben :

Hi, guys, we are going down too fast. And hey, are we not going to Washington? No, sir, we are taking to your favorite place – Ground Zero – in New York Yeah, we wanted you to have a closer look at our economy. Oh No, these two letters A (Al Qaeda) to Z (Ground Zero) sums up my history. Yeah, our economy is on Viagra. Needs stimulus practically every day me too. Mr. President. All these banks... I am learning new ABC Really, what’s that? A for AIG, B for Bank of America; C for Citi; G for Goldman; F for Fannie, l for Lehman

Anil Selarka©2009 Bush Last Journey to Earth – 911 to 119 Pauly : Hi, Bernie, It’s Interesting. We have entire alphabets lined up Bush : Pauly : Ben : Bush : Pauly : Ben : Bush : Pauly : Ben :

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Hi, Guys, where are we now. Have we signed up for Kyoto? Why roads are so green? These are all our freeways, Mr. President They are all covered with our Greenback. We printed 3 to 4 trillions by now. Really, I thought it was just $700 billions, Pauly We thought so. But then everyday, we were getting a bank with a begging bowl. We have been printing 3 shifts Mr. President. We are now outsourcing from China. Hi guys there. Why sky is so red? Are we in California? Do we have another 911? No Mr. President. We are in 119, not 911; today is your last day, remember? We are in New York, sir. These are all bank towers burning down to Ground Zero!

Finally, the plane landed on Ground Zero. Bush, Bernanke and Paulson stepped out. The Presidency has just ended. All privileges also terminated. Mr. Bush, no longer President Bush, wanted to make a call. He had lost his mobile. He saw a small phone booth round the corner. He fumbled for the coin; did not have any. He called Bernanke Bush : Ben : Pauly : Hey, Bernie, I want to make a call to Laura. Do you have a quarter? No Mr. Bush. I don’t have any. Let me ask Henry. Hey, Pauly, do you have a quarter? No, me too.

Anil Selarka©2009 Bush : Ben : Pauly : Bush : Pauly : Ben : Bush : Pauly : Ben : Bush : Pauly : Ben : Bush : Pauly : Ben : Bush :

Bush Last Journey to Earth – 911 to 119

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You said you printed trillions of dollars recently, and you don’t have a quarter? Yes, we used Blotting Paper instead of Security paper. They soaked all Red ink. Why don’t you make a “collect call”, George? Are you calling me George? Do you know who I am? You are no longer a President, George. Get used to civilian life. Will you? I will be still around if you need me, George. I will be in Fed house. Call me. I never knew that a quarter is more valuable than trillions of dollars. I am learning. Right you are George. Physical asset is physical. Paper is a paper. I am also learning this eternal truth first time. They don’t teach at Harvard though. In that case, why did not you tell me so in last 8 years? We told you what you wanted to know, George Very true. We have democracy and freedom of speech outside, not inside. I must see my Guru Who is that? Yeah, who is that? No, I won’t tell you. You will spoil him too. He is my only hope.

The day ended on a sigh of note. History began and downed a chapter on President Bush.

Anil Selarka (Kalidas) Hong Kong, January 19, 2009
Document Details (without this table box)
Main Statistics Document Ref Official Title Key Words Pages 4; Words 993; Characters (no spaces) 4,160; Characters (with spaces) 5,137 Paragraphs 50; Lines 97 Number 0901-022 Date 09.01.19 Author Anil Selarka Screen Name Kalidas Bush’s Last Journey to Earth – 911 to 119 Copyrights © 2009 Anil Selarka (Kalidas) Bush, Bernanke, Paulson, Presidency, Obama, Economy, Banks, Bankruptcy,

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