TOPIC: SURVIVING SETBACKS Now we shouldn't worry too much about the psychological well being of whoever comes out on the short end of the final count in the presidential elections. Both contenders are accustomed to life in the public arena. Their self-esteem is high and their egos strong. There are plenty of folks to support them in defeat. The suffering of the "loser" shouldn't be too tough or too lasting. Unfortunately, when most of us suffer setbacks of a comparable scale in our lives, we can't count on such on outpouring of support and sympathy. So what can we do to successfully survive setbacks? Here are a "lucky seven" thoughts: 1. Reconcile dreams with the reality. If a setback really is final, honestly realizing and recognizing it at least gives a chance to reassess and set new, more appropriate goals for the days ahead. 2. Look at all you've learned to do. Getting as far as you did along the road to a setback had to broaden your experience and enlighten you in new ways. Shift your focus to how you will apply that acquired knowledge in the future. 3. Look at what you've learned not to do. No doubt there are "mistakes" you wouldn't repeat. But you wouldn't have made them in the first place if you had known they were mistakes. Now you know. 4. Seek out your friends. With luck you've made some new ones who appreciate you for what you are, not what you were attempting to become. And perhaps you've neglected some old friends (and family?) in your quest for success. Seek them out. If they were true friends before they will be still. 5. Put things in perspective. Maybe the importance of your effort was not so much to achieve the goal but to blaze the trail or contribute to the basic structure. Despite the setback your efforts may prove to be a formative link in a continuing chain of events. 6. Gain new appreciation of the basics. Still got your health? Good. Can you enjoy a bright day or a starry night? Swell. Consider shifting your attention to the more spiritual or aesthetic. The world's too vast and wonderful to let some temporal incident bring you permanently down. 7. Cope, don't mope. Use the time wisely. Now that you don't have the pressure of striving toward a singular success, use the opportunity of each day to live in the here and now. Geoff Steck Editor