; 2006 Round 1 18th February – Umdoni Golf Course
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2006 Round 1 18th February – Umdoni Golf Course


2006 Round 1 18th February – Umdoni Golf Course

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2006: Round 3: 8 April – Wild Coast Country Club

The Gwavas third 'hit and hope' session of the year took place at the magestic Wild Coast Sun
last Saturday. The course was in showroom condition, which is more than could be said of our
'nasty lttle five footer' Jules. That he made it out onto the course, is a testament to his tenacity.

In spite of playing in probably the worst conditions of wind and rain, Sean Meekers had a rush of
blood to the head and carded a 82, to finish with 31 points on top of a very wet and miserable

Mickey Lynch's 87 and 30 points was good enough for second, and Naveen swindled his way to
third spot. The tote favourite, Softy Farrant claimed the Shithead, but not without some stiff
opposition and terrible golf from 8-Wood.

Woody added another nearest the pin to his collection, prompting talk of having a second and
third in that prize category in future. He only scored 77.

In the matchplay, Jules climbed off his deathbed to beat 'el Capitano' Simpkins, after being
several holes down leading into the back nine. This match is sure to haunt Craig for for several
years to come.

Dillboy showed 8-Wood a clean pair of heels and some solid golf to win 3 and 1.

Gavyn Hasslehough's lessons with Johnny Byrne bore fruit when he gave Porker a good hiding.
Lynch spanked Spike, Lamont bored the crap out of Nick, with his pre-shot routine to win their
game and Bennet didn't need to resort to his knife to beat Harris.

The match of the day was most certainly the David versus Goliath match between Clive and
Woody. Clive showed he was no 'pussy' by hanging the whole round, only to lose on the last

Next on the golf cards is Umhlali on May 27. Don't forget it's an early tee-off at 7am. Us
Glenwood blokes want to get finished so we can go and watch the Green Machine give the
Horsies a hiding.

Tim Clark almost made it two green blazers for the South Coast in 2006, but then again he was
up against Woods, Mickleson and Couples. I suppose you can't compare them to Hoff, Spike and
Schlemmer who 8-Wood had to overcome.

Cheers and don't putt from the rough.

2006: Round 2: 11 March – Mt Edgecombe # 2

The Gwavas trotted out for their second game of the season at Mt Edgecome 2 last Saturday,
fresh from yet another Sharks defeat.

Porker won nearest the pin, or rather only person to hit the green on the 17th, and visitor, Dave
Banbury took aerial photos of Lamont's ball to win longest drive on the 18th.

Lo and behold, they actually won something this month!
Big Deanie from Twini broke his three year drought to claim the winner's jacket on a count-out
from Graeme Harris, after they both posted 34 points. The jacket looked extremely tight as
Deanie was literally bursting with pride atv prize giving.

Grant came in third with 32 points.

Woody shot a mediocre 2 under par 70, and goes out to a plus 8.

Craig gave Murray Naveen 3/1 without vaseline in the matchplay. And Mickey and Softy, who
were trying to break a Guinness record for slow play, finished with Mickey the winner on 6/5.

The next game on the 8th of April is at the Wild Coast, which should sort the men from the boys.

Congrats to Clive and Jules for beating Staats and his Toti Torpedo team at the Drak Challenge a
fornight ago. The beers are now all square.

And remember when you're on the greens. Not those ones Grant!!!

The definition of a Gimmee is an uneasy moment between two bad putters.


2006 Round 1: 18th February – Umdoni Golf Course

There were three particular Gwavas who wore cheesy grins on Saturday afternoon, despite being
savaged by the humidity and Umdoni's back nine. G-Spot Harris, Big Deanie from Twini and
Murray 8-Wood Staats (2005 OoM) had the last laugh over, Craig, Porker, Gavyn, Fred, Jules
and Woodie to name a few, who were left crying in their beers after Liverpool pulled a 'Crouching
Tiger Hidden Dragon' manoeuvre on Man Yoo.

Back to the golf, Porker made a welcome return to form, despite hitting a brick wall on the last
four holes, to take the honours. He was given stiff resistance from Spike who also scored 34
points, and won on a count-out.

Grant, who ignored Princess Di's advice and left his driver at home, slotted into third with 30
points despite enough shanks to open a butchery. Porker put all his weight behind his tee shot on
the 18th to claim longest drive, and Woodie, who slipped up a bit this week to score a below par
73, took nearest the pin on the 3rd. The two of them have as much chance of claiming a prize for
those two feats, as Man Yoo have of winning the FA Cup.

Jules and Clive will be having a rematch against the Toti Torpedo (Murray and partner) at the
Drak Challenge this weekend after having been soundly beaten in the Dusi. Should be

The next round is at Mt Edgcome 2 on March 11, and sees the start of the matchplay.

Good luck and good golf.


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