The Newsletter for Mature Age Gays
September and October 2009 Edition
MAG will celebrate its 18th Anniversary on 26 September 2009.
A Masked Ball Themed Social Evening is planned and we encourage all attendees to wear a mask.
MAG was founded by Steve Ostrow and its first meeting was held at the Clock Tower Hotel, Crown Street, Surry Hills on 16th September 1991.
“Congratulations to MAG on it's 18th birthday! MAG's success is made possible by the contributions of the wonderful members who make it the friendly, welcoming and supportive network it is for so many mature aged gay men. ACON is proud to support MAG, which promotes the physical, mental, sexual and emotional health and wellbeing of its members in a fun and relaxed way. Thanks to founder and MAG Project Officer, Steve Ostrow for his inspiration and long-time commitment and thanks to the hard-working and very talented volunteers for their outstanding and consistent community contributions”.
Michelle Sparks, Manager, Community Development — ACON
Look us up on the web
MAG is a project of
Hello Everyone, It is nice to be back amongst you all, but I am still missing the boyfriend in the UK. I had a great trip to England and Spain and enjoyed some very nice warm weather for a change. Thanks to the guys who filled in for me during my absence. I believe two of our Committee members have been laid up with illness whilst I was away. Mario Panzarino hopefully is back on his feet and on the way to a full recovery from his heart scare. I haven‘t seen Rosco MacKinnon since my return but believe he has come down with a very severe flu. We hope he also will soon be on the mend and be back with us at MAG. Well, what I can say about the big surprise on Saturday 25th July last? Thank you David for organising such a fitting tribute to both Harry 87 and John 80. Both celebrating big birthdays. The entertainer was well received not only by the birthday boys but by most of the guys at the meeting, and not forgetting the birthday cake - it was delicious. No other news at the moment so see you all soon at our next meeting, Love from your President,
MAG Mature Age Gays Caring for each other, sharing friendships and affection with each other in similar situations to lead as full a life as possible
OUR PLANNED EVENTS FOR 2009
To Be Announced
To Be Announced
Theme is - Masked Ball
BYO liquid refreshments
Our 18th Anniversary
Halloween Social Evening Trick or Treat
BYO liquid refreshments
Hi Guys, SEX. Got your attention? Good, have a read.
Contrary to what we would be led to believe, sex after 50 can be as fulfilling as at any earlier age. In fact I must say, that once we get over the athleticism of sex and indulge more in the asthetics, there is no limit to our fantasy life. And other than for procreation, which I guess by 50 we have completed the process or not, depending on our logistical choices, our fantasy life is really what it‘s all about. For without a fantasy life our libido will be strictly dependent on our physical capability and the availability of a partner. There are many ailments that can impede our prowess after, or even before, 50. Chronic illnesses such as diabetes, high blood pressure, arthritis, coronary problems, etc can all limit the extent of our capacity to perform. But our fantasy life is only limited by the extent of our imagination. Sure there are remedies and aphrodisiacs such as Viagra, shark oil, ginko baboa, pumps , inserts, injections and the like, but they are only as good as our ability to conjure up an enticing and exciting aura. Otherwise it becomes a physical act devoid of sensuality and meaning. The intimacy that can be enjoyed by mature aged couples, engendered by trust, history and love, makes the act itself a celebration rather than a confrontation. Once we have opted for the higher spiritual quality of nourishing the other person and taking pleasure in their gratification as much as ours, we have achieved a threshold of sexuality that will last us ‗til the day we die. The act itself may differ in pyrotechnics but the transformation of the spirit and the blessing conferred on one body by another will be our communion. So much of our western sexual custom is based on the physical attributes of young and fabulous bodies that it is easy to be intimidated into thinking that what the average person has to offer is marginal if not unacceptable. But just remember that the average person is who makes up the majority. And if sex and conjugation were based solely on the attributes of an idealized Adam and Eve or Brad Pitt and Nicole Kidman for example, I daresay the population of this world would be reduced by 90%. We have been fashioned and created in so many modes; tall, short, fat, thin, hairy, smooth, blonde, brunette, redhead etc, that it must truly be said that the supermodel, or Adonis prototypes are so far in the minority as to be considered freaks. Luckily not everyone wants to go to bed with a freak, so there is ample opportunity for us average mortals. But beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. If you found yourself shipwrecked on a desert island with no other companion but a 4‘2, 200 lb humanoid with hair growing out of its teeth, but it took care of your needs and looked after you, I can assure you that in time you would grow to love it. Most of the time in any relationship one person is loving the other more. In that situation it is hoped that the other person is gracefully letting them. We all have a capacity to love and unless we find someone to let us shine that love light upon we feel deprived. So such a relationship really works, as long as the positions can change and the partners reciprocate. Then of course there are the need-deficit and co-dependent relationships. ‗I love you, I need you, I can‘t live without you,‘ would scare me to death. It simply is telling me that you have no choice. I would much rather you say, ‗I love you, I don’t need you, I can live very well without you but it‘s far better with you.‘ Now we have two persons loving each other and wanting to be together for the grace and joy they bring to each other‘s lives. A beautiful definition of love is ‗a delight in the presence of another.‘ As we traverse past the mid point of our lives, love and sex become one with the other. No longer is performance a criterion, but rather there is a need for the bodies of two lovers to combine and nourish each other. In such a union there is peace, unity and fulfillment ---why? Because when the skin of one living entity touches that of another without hostility or fear, that is the ultimate entry into Nirvana. As important as it is for a baby to be cuddled and stroked in the formative years of its life, it is equally so for those with less years ahead of us than behind. And that is why sex and love in a mutual relationship is a healing balm on our way to the unknown. For those not in an intimate relationship, such bonding can be found in support groups, religious congregations, friends, family, of course MAG and even in the temporary care of health facility personnel when necessary. Wouldst that we can reach that state of man where any passerby on the street could be enlisted for a hug without fear or prejudice. ‗Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.‘ With love and hugs — Steve
MAG’s 18th Anniversary - 26 September 2009 A Masked Ball is the theme for our 18th Anniversary Evening. All who are planning to come along and celebrate this milestone on Saturday, 26 September 2009 are encouraged to wear a mask. Please consider adding to your mask by dressing in a colourful outfit. More guys dressed up adds to the success of the evening and in doing so you have more fun than those who do not. Please bring your own liquid refreshments. We will be supplying extra goodies for all to enjoy. We are holding a guessing competition and drawing it on the night. 2010 Mardi Gras It has been decided that MAG will not have a bus in next year‘s Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras Parade. At a General Meeting in August, the guys in attendance were asked if they would be prepared to pay say $50 each to travel by bus in the Parade. Only 12 guys said they would be prepared, I was one of them who said yes. Seeing it costs $1,600 to hire the Bus, plus extra funds for decorating it, the Committee decided it would not commit funds to do so. MAG will participate with ACON‘s walking group. To all the guys who cannot walk all that well, I am sorry you cannot enjoy the atmosphere of the Mardi Gras Parade. I voted against the motion; as I still believe that a bus is the best and easiest way of transporting our elderly guys who cannot walk. The $50 could have been paid off by installments. Come nearer to the Parade, we could have filled all the seats. $50 is a very cheap night out at the Mardi Gras Parade. Look at the photos of the crowd that were published in our Newsletter to see the response MAG received along the Parade route with our Bus and walking group. The 2010 Mardi Gras Fair Day, MAG will have only one stall instead of the two we have had for the past number of years. Birthday Boys A few of our guys had milestones, age wise, recently. John C. turned 80 years and Harry W. 87 years, both in July, whilst Brian B. turns 90 years in August, as this Newsletter goes to print. A Police Officer came to MAG to arrest John for turning 80 years. This Officer then proceeded to entertain all gathered at the meeting whilst he removed some of his clothing to exotic, loud and hand clapping music. A very pleasant evening was had by all. We extend our best wishes to these guys and thank them for their contribution to MAG. For anyone else who had a special birthday — we send you our best wishes. Please see some pics of the night on Page 7. Halloween Evening On Saturday 31st October, we will be holding a social the night of Halloween. A trick or treat night. We ask all to come along dressed in something appropriate for Halloween, even though it is not an Australian experience. Again, please bring your own liquid refreshments, and we‘ll have extra goodies to enjoy – either tricks or treats or two or more. White Buckets During our General Meetings, we pass around white buckets to collect donations to replenish MAG‘s funds that have been outlaid for the provision of supper after the meeting. We do this so guys do not have to make their contribution when they are lining up at the supper tables. To the guys who bring in goodies for supper, you do not need to make a donation to the Buckets. We sincerely thank you for your goodies for supper, especially the home made delights. David, Secretary & Editor of the Newsletter . Tel:  9516 2063.
Should you no longer wish to receive this MAGazine, kindly inform me — thanks
The opinions expressed in this Newsletter are those of individuals and do not necessarily reflect the policies of MAG or ACON.
CANCER & SEXUALITY STUDY
A new study based at the University of Western Sydney is researching the effect of cancer and cancer treatments on sexuality and intimacy in relationships from the perspective of people with cancer and their partners, leading to the development of a supportive intervention to help couples deal with such issues. The project team are looking for people with cancer and/or the intimate partners of a person with cancer to take part in the study. This will involve completing a questionnaire, which is available online at http://www.uws.edu.au/cancerandsexuality or by contacting the Project Co-ordinator Caroline Joyce on 1800 19 20 02 or by email: email@example.com. TO MY SON, ANDREW.
Recipe For Friendship
Fold two hands together And express a dash of sorrow Marinate it overnight And work on it tomorrow Chop one grudge in tiny pieces Add several cups of love Dredge with a large sized smile Mix with the ingredients above Dissolve the hate within you By doing a good deed Cut in and help your friend If he should be in need Stir in laughter, love, and kindness From the heart it has to come Toss with genuine forgiveness And give your neighbour some The amount of people served Will depend on you It can serve the whole wide world If you really want it to.
(For Steve Horinka‘s Son) Written by Warren Sawkins.
To my Son, Andrew. On your birthday, 19th July, 2009. I remember the day you were conceived. A memorable day I never believed. Over the years, I watched you grow, through the years as a wee nipper. Now you are older, you have become your own person, your own skipper. I know you feel pain from the past. Tomorrow always comes and the Yesterdays never last. Please let go, and let your love show. To you, I feel no shame, inside I feel dirt, because inside is where, I really hurt. I only offer you unconditional love from the sky above. This is the future here now. Why can‘t we be together. Think love together, and show each other how.
10th July, 2009.
Love from your Father.
John turned 80 and Harry turned 87 in the month of July. A special surprise was arranged for a Police Officer [Milan] to come to and arrest John. He did just that and also entertained all in attendance while he arrested John with some loud, exotic, hand clapping music. He also interrogated Harry.
Here are some pics
John with Milan’s cap enjoying being arrested
John and Harry cutting their birthday cake
John with Milan’s g-string going lower
SIGNS OF THE TIMES..
Notes from Guest Speakers
Raymond Webb from ACON’s Housing Project — our Guest Speaker on the evening of 11th July.
Thinking back to the night I was a little apprehensive, and was expecting a small number but was quite shocked with the number of people, you said about 100+ people turned up that night, it looked a good format very light, relaxed and not too heavy. Seemed a good mix of people from all backgrounds. I hope I was OK. I felt I could not answer too much as I primarily focus on the HIV side of the Housing Office here at ACON, while Fred Oberg is the GLBT Housing Officer. If it was me dealing with HIV positive people I could probably be a little informative. I would suggest there would be different issues with GLBT issues than there would be with the HIV positive people especially around health issues and concerns. Also just to let you know that I have had a couple of people from MAG call through over the last week or so asking if ACON Housing could help them out, which is great!
Raymond Webb - ACON Housing Message from Quentin Dempster from the ABC — our Guest Speaker on 8 August 2009. Congratulations on your efforts in sustaining MAG over all these years. As expected I encountered a switched on, engaging and politically aware membership. MAG is a wonderful example of a compassionate and supportive grass roots community organisation operating in a sometimes inhumane world. Rather than becoming insular it is full of life experience, enlightened and outward looking. All the very best. Quentin Dempster, Journalist, ABC TV Note from David Back in July this year Dan and Ronnie, who reside in North
Carolina, in the USA, visited our fair city and asked, in an email, if they could attend a MAG Meeting whilst they were in Sydney and was there a cost. I replied to say ‗Yes, most definitely come along and that there was no cost‘. I met up with them when they arrived in town, took them for dinner at the Taxi Club and then for a stroll down the Golden Mile. They did attend a MAG meeting and sent a note of thanks : ―David, it
was a pleasure seeing you in action at MAG. You are definitely a people person — just the right prescription for the B-12 shot that many of us can use to perk things up. You and the executive committee + volunteers are to be commended for what MAG offers from camaraderie, to informative sessions, to warmth and hospitality. I suspect that many members MAG allows them to keep going, to connect in their own meaningful way at their own level. For what it‘s worth … I mention only to provide credibility. Until retiring in 2008, as a Certified Financial Planner, I provided financial planning advice for 19 years. This was preceded by 20+ years as a music educator and conductor. So, I went from musical instruments to financial instruments/estate planning/etc. Oops, there goes my credibility. Back to the Music: See who plays instruments — musical that is. Pass around the hat and I‘ll come in and rehearse the group and get them ready for the next Parade. David, on behalf of Ronnie and myself, I thank you for the personal time you gave us and for the warmth and hospitality at the MAG meeting. You are a swell person. Dan.‖
A Few Good Senior Moments An elderly gentleman
had a serious hearing problem for a number of years. He went to the doctor who was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, ‗Your hearing is perfect … Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.‖ The gentleman replied, ―Oh, I haven‘t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I‘ve changed my will three times!‖
Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement centre were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: ―Slim,
I‘m 83 years old and I‘m just full of aches and pains. I know you‘re about my age. How do you feel?‖ Slim replies, ―I feel just like a newborn baby.‖ ―Really?‖ ―Like a new born baby!?― Yep, no hair, no teeth and I think I‘ve just wet my pants.‖
Three old guys are out:
First one says, ―Windy, isn‘t it?‖ Second one says, ―No, it‘s Thursday.‖ Third one says, ―So, am I. Let‘s go get a beer.‖
A couple in their nineties
are both having problems remembering things. During a check up, the doctor tells them that they are physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember... Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair, ―Want anything while I‘m in the kitchen?‖ he asks his dear wife. ―Will you get me a bowl of ice cream, please?‖ ―Sure..‖ ―Don‘t you think you should write it down so you can remember it?‖ she asks. ―No, I can remember it.‖ ―Well, I‘d like strawberries, too. Maybe you should write it down, so as not to forget it?‖ He says, ―I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries‖ ―I‘d like whipped cream. I‘m certain you‘ll forget that, write it down?‖ she asks. Irritated, he says, ― I do not need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream — I got it, for goodness sake!‖ Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs ... She stares at the plate for a moment. ―Where‘s my toast?‖ Remembering MAG in your Will.
Previous members have bequeathed a small amount of funds from their wills to MAG, following their passing. We would be very honoured if members or friends of MAG may care to consider doing something similar.
DO YOU KNOW HOW IF FEELS? NUMBER 2. The sky from my inside view has decided to turn blue. I witness this now but nothing I can do. The rain has gone into hiding for a temporary stay. All is wet but yet, what does that say. Your job will still be there, future moments, more times to come for you to care. Illness can be a worry, sickness has no quick recovery. Your health is your wealth, nothing in between. Life is now and real, it only deals one deal. You don‘t throw your patience away. Life moves progressively on, no rest period where it may stray or stay. Thank you, if you know how I did feel. Many of you and others lives out there, maybe have witnessed the same deal as mine, day by day real. MAG will be holding a Guessing Competition that will be drawn on the night of our 18th Anniversary Birthday Celebration. Tickets are on sale NOW — $1.00 each or 3 for $2.00. The prize is a 1litre bottle of Johnny Walker Black Label Whiskey. We trust all will support this fund raiser.
[thanks Harry W for your most kind donation]
By Warren Sawkins
MAG MAGAZINE POET Written 10 July 2009
MAGnet — is our mid week venue for mature gay and bi men. Every Wednesday evening meeting at the Taxi Club, on Flinders Street, Darlinghurst, from 6:30pm for a meal. It is a great place to be at. We recommend guys join the Taxi Club — it’s only $11 per year and you can enjoy all the benefits. MAG invites all mature age gay and bisexual men to join our guys in having a meal, a drink and socialising.
please note your Diaries On Saturday, 12 December 2009, we are proud to announce that
will be our entertainer for our Christmas Party.
This year our Party will be held at our normal meeting place — the lower ground floor of the ACON Building, 9 Commonwealth Street, Sydney. Please consider bringing something really extra special for the supper table.
President: Erroll Higson 9557 5903 Secretary: David Bowron 9516 2063 Treasurer: John O‘Dea 9521 1953 ACON — Project Officer MAG and the founder of MAG: Steve Ostrow 9358 1460
Acceptance (Gay Catholics) Tel. 9568 4433.
Friday Mass, St. Josephs Church, Bedford Street, Newtown, 8pm. Aleph Australia for gay Jews & friends, Contact Michael 9300 9700. Asian Project Contact Solomon 9206 2080
bgay Community News
Bradley Falappi Ross MacKinnon Richard King Mario Panzarino MAGIC
9550 6359 — 0425 248 480 0438 931 999
Contact Marc on 0404112831. Country Network a national social network of gay men. Sydney Metro contact is Neil Maguire on 9547 1258.
Cronulla Gay Group
Contact John 9528 9158 or Eric 9589 1161. Cross Section for gays within the Uniting Church phone Des 9319 0722. GAMMA Gay & Married Men's Assoc Meets on 1st & 3rd Wed every month, at 9 C‘wealth St, Surry Hills. Tel. 9267 4000 www.gamma.org au Gaydownunder www.gaydownunder.com GLCS Tel. 1800 184 527
MAG in the Community. For guys who are ill, in hospital, or who require assistance. Please contact Noel Hunter on (02) 96991317.
Our postal address is: MAG PO Box 350 DARLINGHURST NSW 1300 Web site is magnsw.org.
MAG meetings are held at: Lower Ground Floor ACON Building 9-25 Commonwealth Street, Darlinghurst The entrance is at the back of the building, on the corner of Clarke and Alberta Streets. We meet of the second and last Saturdays of each month, from 6:30 pm for tea & coffee with the meeting commencing at 7:00pm, usually with a Guest Speaker — sometimes we’ll have a social evening,
GSN - Gay Sydney Nudists
contact Tony James 49725357.
MCC Good Shepherd 6:30pm Sundays
Pastor Robert Clark Tel. 9386 9293 37 East Street, Granville. MCC Sydney 10:00am & 6:30pm Sundays Pastor Gavin Ward Tel. 9569 5122 96 Crystal Street, Petersham. PFLAG Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians & Gays. www.pflagaustralia.org SCOG Southern Cross Outdoor Group: bushwalks and other outdoor activities in the Sydney area. Contact John 9907 9144. Email address is firstname.lastname@example.org SPAIDS Dates on tree planting days contact email@example.com for further information.
Independent Catholic Church of Aust
Meetings: fortnightly at 320 Riley Street, Surry Hills. Contact: Father Peter on 9588 6893 or 0419 464 353 WAGS 1st and 3rd Saturdays of month ACON, 13 Ellen Street, Wollongong 7:00pm till 9:00pm. There is no supper. www.wags.net.au Apostolic Community of St Nicholas Meeting: 1st Sunday of the month at 11am 10/5-6 Edgar Cres, Belfield Community Pastor Alexei G Schmidt 9642 7881.
A light supper follows.
The Executive Committee meets on the second Saturday of the month after the General Meeting.
Editor — David 9516 2063