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					Reproductive Health and Safety
   7 th Grade Introduction & Classroom Guidelines
                                           A CRAZY TALE

Once upon a time there lived a very young and very beautiful woman. She lived with her
husband, a wealthy movie star, in a mansion near Hollywood. The young woman felt unhappy
and neglected because her husband frequently took long trips for movie shoots. One day, while
she was alone in the mansion, a handsome rock star drove by in his Bentley. He noticed the
young woman, quickly won her heart, and took her away with him.

After a day of partying like a rock star, the young woman found herself abandoned. She
discovered that the only path back to her mansion led through the evil town of Ellisonville and
Evil Ellison was the mayor. Not willing to brave the great danger alone, the woman visited the
home of her godfather. She explained what she had done, and begged forgiveness and help.
The godfather, however, was shocked. He refused all help.

The woman had almost given up hope when she spied Sproul The Great. He pledged his
unfailing help—for a small price. Unfortunately the woman had no money, so Sproul The Great
drove away in his minivan .

The woman had no one left to whom she could turn. She decided to brave the evil town of
Ellisonville and the Evil Ellison alone. She entered Ellisonville, whereupon the Evil Ellison caused
her to be devoured by an angry bear.
Who Is To Blame?
1.   The Woman
2.   The Movie Star (husband)
3.   Rock Star in the Bentley
4.   The woman’s Godfather
5.   Evil Ellison
6.   Sproul The Great
7.   The Bear
RHASE Classroom Guidelines
 Respect what other people say; no put downs
 Be sensitive to other people’s feelings
 Respect other people’s differences
 Keep discussion and questions away from a personal
 Keep confidential all comments made by other
 There are no “dumb” questions
 Use CORRECT scientific terms rather than slang

                    END UNIT INTRODUCTION
Sex: Everybody’s Talking About
        Choosing the Best PATH
               Lesson 1
What Will I Learn?
 Insights & Facts
 Practical Ideas for remaining abstinent
 Avoiding risks of teen pregnancy and sexually
  transmitted diseases (STD’s)
 Each lesson will have the following:
   Brief video segment then discussion
   Lesson exercises, application activities
   Sharing assignment with parent/guardian
Video: “What Teens Think About Sex”
 Time To Talk
  1. What reasons do some of these teens give for being
     sexually active?
  2. What are some of the risks of having sex?
  3. Why do you think the majority of teens today are not
     sexually active?
Video: “Why Do I Hurt Inside?”
 Time To Talk
  1. Did any of the risks that the teens mentioned
     surprise you?
  2. What are some of the possible negative emotional
     consequences of having sex?
  3. How does being sexually active as a teenager affect
     how a person feels about himself or herself?
Time To Experience: A Bonding
 Repeated sexual encounters can make it difficult to
  maintain lasting relationships because it becomes
  harder to bond emotionally.
 Activity: 1 male and 1 female volunteer.
 Time To Experience: A Rose With No Petals
 Time To Learn: Unscramble the following words that
  identify possible negative emotional consequences of
  sexual activity
     litgu
     yrowr
     topnapsinmited
     slso of fels – preects
     sprisdeneo
Time To Build Character: Self-Respect
 Self-respect means treating yourself as a valuable

 How does being sexually active affect self-respect?
Read the following story:
 Maria babysits for a family that lives next door to a
  guy named Roberto who goes to her school. Maria has
  had a crush on Roberto for awhile, but he has ignored
  her until recently. Every time she’s babysitting, he
  shows up at the door and wants to come inside the
  house. Sometimes when the baby is sleeping, he
  comes over and watches videos with her. Gradually
  Roberto and Maria become friendlier. She’s
  uncomfortable with some of the things they do, but
  she doesn’t want to lose him. After he leaves, she
  often doesn’t feel good about herself.
Questions To Answer
 How do activities that make Maria uncomfortable
  lower her self-respect?
 What other negative emotional consequences could
  Maria experience?
 If you were in Maria’s place, what would you do?
     Homework Assignment: Interview
     your parent/guardian and write down
     their responses to the following

1. Why do you think some teenagers today start having
2. What are the risks for sexually active teenagers?
3. What are some of the possible negative emotional
   consequences of premarital sex?
4. What is the most important advice about sex that an
   adult could give a teen who will listen?
                              END LESSON 1
Lesson 1 Quiz
(Answer questions on a piece of paper)
1. List 3 possible negative emotional consequences of
   teen sex.
2. List 3 possible risks of being sexually active.
3. Give 4 reasons why the majority of teens today are
   not sexually active.
The Risks of STDs and
       Lesson 2
Time To Watch: “It Couldn’t Happen to
 Time To Talk
   Why did many of these teens think that the negative
    consequences of sex wouldn’t happen to them?
   How did getting an STD or HIV/AIDS change their
Time to Learn: Fill In The Blanks
1.   STDs are_________ transmitted diseases.
2.   There are over________ significant STDs.
3.   Some STDs can be contracted from_________ fluids of another
     infected person. Other STDs can be contracted from _____ to
     ______ contact.
4.   Bacterial STDs can be cured with antibiotics; viral STDs are
5.   Many people with STDs do not have symptoms, so you often do
     _________ know who is infected.
6.   About one in _______ sexually active teens will contract an STD
     each year.
7.   The only way to totally eliminate the risk of contracting an STD is
     to: be___________ until marriage, marry an _______ person and,
     both people must remain___________ in the marriage relationship.
     Further, both partners, must not participate in other high risk
     activities (ex. IV drug use).
 Chlamydia is a common _______ STD, infecting 3
  million people in the U.S. each year. Including ____
  million young people aged 15-24. Many people have
  ___ symptoms with chlamydia. If symptoms are
  present they may include abnormal discharge or a
  burning sensation when urinating.
 While the disease can be cured with antibiotics, if left
  untreated it can have serious consequences.
  Chlamydia can lead to pelvic inflammatory disease
  (PID) in women, which can lead to infertility.
 Gonorrhea, another common bacterial STD, infects
  _____ people in the U.S. each year.
 Although many may have_____ symptoms at all,
  symptoms in men and women may include a burning
  sensation when urinating or abnormal discharges. In
  women symptoms may be mild and mistaken for a
  vaginal infection.
 Gonorrhea can be cured with antibiotics, but remains
  a major cause of________ leading to infertility.
                                  Virus (HPV)
Human Papilloma 5.5 million new infections each year
 HPV is a common_______ STD with
  and 20 million people currently infected in the U.S.
 There are 30 types of HPV that can affect the _____area, including those
  “high risk” strains that can lead to cervical cancer in women. Nearly
  ______ women die of cervical cancer each year. Other “low risk” types of
  HPV cause genital _______, small growths on the genital area. HPV can be
  spread by contact with the genital area of an infected partner.
 There is ______ medical cure for HPV. Most mild infections can be
  destroyed by the body’s immune system over time. If a “high risk” HPV
  infection is not cleared by the immune system, it can remain present for
  many years and turn abnormal cells into cancer over time.
 A new vaccine against HPV is currently available for females and protects
  against the strains of HPV that are the most common causes of cervical
  cancer and genital warts. While the vaccine is expected to reduce rates of
  cervical cancer, it does not provide complete protection. So sexually
  active females are still at risk and should get regular Pap tests, which are
  important for detecting cervical cancer early, when it can be treated most
  effectively. Students should talk with their parents and doctors about this
Genital Herpes
 Genital herpes is another common ______ STD. In the
  U.S., there are 1 million new infections each year with 45
  million people currently infected, involving nearly one in
  every _______ people 12 years and older.
 With or without symptoms, genital herpes can be
  transmitted by_______ contact between sex partners.
 Some people with genital herpes have symptoms, but most
  don’t. Typical symptoms of genital herpes are painful,
  recurring _______ or sores on or around the genitals or
  rectum. People diagnosed with a first episode can expect
  to have 4 to 5 outbreaks within a year. Medications can
  help with outbreaks, but there is ____ cure for genital
 Trichomoniasis is a common STD caused by a
  microscopic _______ infecting 5 million people in the
  U.S. each year.
 Most men have _____ symptoms. Some women may
  have a vaginal discharge and experience discomfort
  during intercourse or urination.
 Trichomoniasis can be diagnosed through a physical
  exam with a lab test, and can be _____ with a
  prescription drug.
Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV)
Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome (AIDS)
 HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, progressively
  destroys the body’s ability to fight ______ and certain
  cancers. HIV is most often transmitted through
  sexual contact.
 Of the approximately 56,000 new HIV cases per year,
  an estimated _____ percent of those occurred among
  young people under age 30.
 It may take ____ before symptoms of AIDS appear.
  However, an infected person can infect other sexual
  partners whether or not symptoms are present.
Correct these false statements about
HIV/AIDS by crossing out or adding words
that will make it true.
1. There is a cure for HIV/AIDS
2. An individual knows when he or she is infected with
3. You cannot contract HIV from oral sex.
4. A person can contract HIV by shaking hands with
   an infected person.
5. HIV/AIDS is only an adult disease and does not
   occur in teenagers.
Time To Learn
 There are more than (10, 25, 100) significant sexually
  transmitted diseases.
 Every year approximately (2, 4, 8) million teens
  acquire an STD.
 That’s (1001, 2542, 10,959) every day, (101, 342, 457)
  every hour, or one every (8, 20, 30) seconds.
Activity: The Roll of the Dice
 FACT: When you have sex, you are exposed to your partner’s previous partners as well. The
   possibility of getting an STD multiplies as each partner has sex with more people.

Your Partners             Their Partners

                                                           6                            2
   6                                   _____
Total of your                                                            U
                                                            5                           3
Partner’s partners:                    _____

Total of your partners:          +     _____

Total exposures:                     = ______                            4
 Compassion is the attitude and action of caring about someone
  who is in a distressing or difficult situation.
 Time To Build Character
   Write a letter to your parent or guardian describing
    how you would feel if you had contracted HIV/AIDS.
 Time To Share (interview parent/guardian)
   1.   What are some of the most common STDs?
   2.   Can STDs be cured?
   3.   How can you tell if someone has an STD?
   4.   What is the only way to eliminate the risk of
        contracting an STD?

                                    END LESSON 2
Lesson 2 Review Quiz
1. T/F STDs are sexually transmitted diseases.
2. T/F There are over 25 significant STDs.
3. T/F STDs can be contracted from body fluids of
   another infected person.
4. T/F You will always know if you have an STD
5. T/F You can always tell if your partner has an STD.
6. T/F Many STDs have no symptoms.
7. T/F You can contract HIV and other STDs through
   oral sex.
8. List 3 of the most common STDs.
Teen Pregnancy and “Safe Sex”?
            Lesson 3
“Growing Up Too Quickly”
 Watch: “Growing Up Too Quickly”
 Time To Talk
   Why did these couples think they wouldn’t get pregnant?
   How did their lives change after they got pregnant?
 Fill In The Blank
   1.   There are approximately _______ teen pregnancies each
   2.   Nearly ______ of sexually experienced teen girls (those
        who have had sexual intercourse at least once) have been
   3.   Teen mothers are less likely to finish high school: only
        about _____ of teenagers who have a child before they are
        18 have earned a high school diploma by age 30.
   4.   _________ is the only way to be absolutely sure that you
        will not be involved in a teen pregnancy.
Time To Learn
 Remember pregnancy is always a “we” event – it takes two to
  create a baby. What would happen if you (or your girlfriend)
  became pregnant? What options would you have, and what are
  the potential consequences of each option?

POSSIBLE OUTCOMES                           CONSEQUENCES
1. Become a single ________.
2. Get __________.
3. Have an __________.
4. Place the baby up for __________.
A Typical Teen Mother’s Schedule
(Fill in the missing times you think it takes to do various activities)
§   __ a.m.: wake up
§   __ a.m.: take shower and get ready for school
§   __ a.m.: wake up and dress my son/daughter
§   __ a.m.: take my son/daughter to day-care
§   6:30 a.m.: go to school
§   1:30 p.m.: pick up my son/daughter at day-care
§   __ p.m.: give my son/daughter a bath
§   __ p.m.: feed him/her
§   __ p.m.: unpack his/her diaper bag and repack new one
§   __ p.m.: play with my son/daughter
§   __ p.m.: get ready for work
§   5:00 p.m.: go to work
§   9:15 p.m.: come home, feed my son/daughter, put him/her to bed
§   __ p.m.: make formula for the next day
§   __ p.m.: clean up the house (do laundry and homework)
§   __p.m.: go to bed
§   5:00 a.m.: wake up
§   5:15 a.m.: take shower and get ready for school
§   6:00 a.m.: wake up and dress my son/daughter
§   6:15 a.m.: take my son/daughter to day-care
§   6:30 a.m.: go to school
§   1:30 p.m.: pick up my son/daughter at day-care
§   2:00 p.m.: give my son/daughter a bath
§   2:30 p.m.: feed him/her
§   3:00 p.m.: unpack his/her diaper bag and repack new one
§   3:30 p.m.: play with my son/daughter
§   4:00 p.m.: get ready for work
§   5:00 p.m.: go to work
§   9:15 p.m.: come home, feed my son/daughter, put him/her to bed
§   9:30 p.m.: make formula for the next day
§   9:45 p.m.: clean up the house (do laundry and homework)
§   10:30 p.m.: go to bed
Just the Facts!
  Because latex condoms are made of rubber they can
   _____ and ______. Studies show that this occurs ___ to
   ____ % of the time.
  Typical couples who use condoms for birth control
   experience a first year failure rate of _____ % in
   preventing pregnancies.
Just the Facts! Continued….
               For condoms to most effectively reduce the risk of contracting STDs they must be
                used consistently, _________ time, and correctly. When used every time, condoms
                   Most effective against HIV, reducing the risk by ____% versus not using a condom at all.
                    However, ___% of the risk remains for a life threatening disease with no cure.
                   Approximately ____% effective in reducing the risk of STDs spread by body _____, such as
                    chlamydia, gonorrhea, trichomoniasis. However, _____% of the risk remains.
                   Less effective in reducing the risk of STDs spread by _____ to ______ contact (ex. Herpes,
                    syphilis). Condoms offer ___ protection if the infection is located outside the area covered by
                    the condom.
                   Studies also show that condoms are less effective in protecting against _____, the most
                    common viral STD. However, some risk reduction may occur with HPV related symptoms (ex.
                    Genital warts and cervical cancer).
        According to the CDC, condom use cannot guarantee absolute protection against any
               Is “safe or safer sex” safe enough?_________
        ________ provides the only 100% protection against contracting an STD.
Time to Experience
 We know that the annual failure rate of typical couples using condoms
  to prevent a pregnancy is 15 percent. A 15 percent annual failure rate
  means it fails approximately 1 out of every 7 times over the course of a
 Which of these activities would you do if you
  knew there was a 15 percent annual failure rate?
    A roller coaster ride at Carowinds?
    An airline flight?
    Skydiving?
 Why do some teenagers risk getting pregnant,
  contracting an STD, or being emotionally hurt by
  being sexually active and using a condom?
METHOD              User Failure Rate   HIV/STD Prevention

No Contraception    85%                 NONE

Spermicidal foam    29%                 NONE

Rhythm (Calendar)   25%                 NONE

Male Condom         15%                 Most effective against
                                        HIV; Less risk reduction
                                        against other STDs.
Diaphragm           16%                 NONE

Oral – “The Pill”   8%                  NONE

Depo-Provera        3%                  NONE

IUD                 .9%                 NONE

Abstinence          0%                  100% PREVENTION
 Definition: Responsibility is the attitude and action of realizing
  and accepting the fact that you are accountable for your actions.

 Make a list of ways your life would change if you were a
  parent responsible for a baby.
Time To Share
 Interview a parent/guardian by asking the following
   1. How would you define “safe or safer sex”?
   2. Does using a condom eliminate the risk of getting
   3. Does using a condom eliminate the risk of
      contracting and sexually transmitted disease?
   4. What is the only way to totally eliminate the risk of
      pregnancy or contracting an STD?

                              END LESSON 3
Lesson 3 Quiz
1.   T/F There are more than 800,000 teenage pregnancies each
2.   T/F Most teen moms will graduate from high school.
3.   T/F Typical couples who use condoms for birth control
     experience a first year failure rate of 15% in preventing
4.   T/F Condoms can break and slip off.
5.   T/F Condoms do eliminate the risk of contracting STDs.
6.   T/F Some STDs are transmitted through skin-to-skin contact.
7.   T/F Abstinence is the only 100% way to absolutely certain
     you will not be involved in a teen pregnancy.
8.   List 3 ways teen couples’ lives can change with a teen
Pressures To Be Sexually Active
             Lesson 4
“Where’s the Pressure Coming From?”
 Watch “Where’s the Pressure Coming From?”
 Time to Talk
   What does it mean to be “pressured”?
   What pressures to be sexually active did the teens
   What does the media say about sex?
Pressure #1: Peer Pressure
 What is peer pressure?
   Pressure to do something because a peer (friend) wants
    you to do it.
 What causes someone to do something just because
  others want them to do it?
   Ex.) fear of rejection, need for acceptance
 What are you willing to do to be accepted?
Pressure #2: It’s a Hormone Thing
 Hormones cause sexual development and growth, as well
  as intense sexual feelings.

 It is normal to have sexual feelings as your body changes.
  However, acting on what feels good without thinking of
  the consequences is an immature way to handle these
  sexual pressures.

 An immature attitude says: I want it. I need it. I’ll do it my
 A mature attitude says: I’ll think before I act. I’ll consider
  the consequences. I won’t act on my feelings.
Maturity Vs. Immaturity
**For each Action give a mature and an immature response and consequence for

ACTION                    RESPONSE                   CONSEQUENCES
You get angry
You want to be accepted
by others

You’re too tired to
practice with the team

You don’t want to study
for a test

Someone you like wants
to have sex with you
Pressure #3: Curiosity Killed…
(Well, You Know That Old Saying!)
 How is curiosity a sexual pressure?
 Time To Experience Activity (A Mint for Marriage)
   How does a peppermint pattie smell?
   How does the smell make you anticipate the taste?
Pressure #4: The Risks of Alcohol
What do you know about its effect on teenagers?
1.   Teens 15 and older who drink alcohol are (not as, a little, seven
     times) likelier to have sex than those who don’t drink.
2.   Alcohol (lowers, keeps the same, increases) inhibitions, resulting
     in poor judgment.
3.   Alcohol is a (toxic drug, stimulant, depressant).
4.   A (shot of liquor, can of beer, glass of wine) contains the most
5.   Alcohol can impair (mental, social, sexual) development in young
6.   Binge drinking (more than 4-5 drinks in one sitting) can numb
     brain cells causing (a headache, a stomachache, death).
7.   Alcohol use is present in nearly (one-tenth, one-third, half to
     three-fourths) of all date rapes among college students.
8.   Alcoholism is a chronic disease with (no cure, some cure, a
     complete cure). Currently, nearly 14 million Americans – 1 in every (3,
     5, 13) adults – abuse alcohol or are alcoholics.
 Definition: Respect is the attitude and action of valuing others
  and treating each person with dignity.
 Which of the following situations demonstrates
      You tease another person
      You put down your boyfriend/girlfriend after you break up
      You listen when a friend is hurting
      You don’t join in when others start gossiping
      You tell rude jokes about the opposite sex
 How can you show respect to another person?

                                     END LESSON 4
Lesson 4 Quiz
1.   List 4 ways teens might feel pressured to have sex.
2.   What message does the media give about sex?
3.   Give a characteristic of immature behavior.
4.   Give a characteristic of mature behavior.
5.   List 3 ways alcohol can adversely affect a young
Choosing The Best Path
        Lesson 5
“Choosing Abstinence Until Marriage”
 Watch “Choosing Abstinence Until Marriage”
 Time To Talk
   Why do you think more than half of teenagers choose to be
   Why do you think the teens say that abstinence until
    marriage is the best path for a teenager to take?
   What freedoms do you have if you choose to wait until
 Time To Experience
   ½ of class: Reasons why some teens choose to have sex.
   ½ of class: Reasons why some teens choose to not have sex.
   Which list has the healthiest ideas to help you choose the
    best path?
What Is Abstinence?
 Abstinence is easy as A-B-C
  Abstinence is the:
  Best preparation for the future by:
  Choosing not to engage in these at-risk sexual behaviors:
        Sexual intercourse
        Oral sex
        Anal sex
        Mutual masturbation
 Waiting to have sex gives you freedom to pursue goals and
 List 3 goals and how abstinence will help you reach each
Time To Experience Activity:
Make Your Own Bed
 13 volunteers
   8 girls
   5 guys
 Each volunteer will receive a sign with a name on it to
 Paper represents Michael & Makayla’s wedding bed.
 I will read a story, when you hear the name on your
  sign called come and sit on the paper.

                            END LESSON 5
Lesson 5 Quiz
1. List 3 reasons why some teens choose to be sexually
2. List 5 reasons why the majority of teens choose to be
3. Abstinence is the best preparation for the ________
   by________ not to engage in at-risk sexual behavior.
4. Which of the following is considered an at-risk sexual
     a)   Vaginal sex
     b)   Oral sex
     c)   Anal sex
     d)   Mutual masturbation
     e)   All of these
Set It! The Need for Boundaries
             Lesson 6
“Developing the Best Relationships”
 Watch Video
 Time To Talk
   Is there a difference between love and sex?
   Can you love someone without having sex?
   How does choosing not to have sex affect a
Time To Experience:
What Are You Looking For?
 Class divided into boys and girls
 Each group appoints a leader
 You will have 7 minutes to work on answering the
  questions on the next slide.
 The opposite group will award points from 1-5 for
  each response you think reflects a healthy
  understanding of the opposite sex. The group with
  the highest score wins.
The Guys/Girls Have Their Say…
1. What do you wish guys/girls knew about guys/girls?
2. What qualities do you look for in a guy/girl?
3. What qualities do you think guys/girls want in a
4. What activities would make a great date?
5. What activities do you think guys/girls would like
   on a great date?
Love or Infatuation?
   is a commitment to the happiness of someone you care
    about. It is tested by time and circumstances.
   is an intense feeling or being attracted to another
    person, which is untested by time and circumstances.
 What is one way you can tell if you are in love or if
  you are infatuated with the other person?
   (let time go by, spend time together doing what the
    other person likes to do)
Guys Vs. Girls
 Which group will place the words/phrases in the
  correct group (Love or Infatuation)?
 You will label your paper with 2 columns
   LOVE
 When the next slide appears write the correct
  words/phrases in the correct column (Love or
                 Based on by time
                  Untested feelings
                 Cares for another
                 Possessive the person
                  Fears losing
                 Happens frequently
                  A decision
                 Excludes others in
                  A physical attraction
                 relationships
                  Self giving
                 A friendship that grows
                  Increases over time
                 Trusting
                 Expects immediate
                  Strengthens the
                 Patient with the other
                 jealous
Setting Boundaries
 On their first date Alan and Susie were both shy. As the
  night went on, they felt more comfortable and held hands.
  At the end of the date, Alan gave Susie a short kiss. On
  their next date, one kiss was not enough and they kissed
  for several minutes. Eventually, that was no longer
  satisfying and they started fooling around more seriously.
  Before they knew what was happening there was only one
  line left to cross, and they had sex. Soon their relationship
  grew bitter. They broke up, each feeling used and empty.
   1.   How did sex affect their relationship?
   2.   Why did Alan and Susie feel the need to go further each
The Law of Diminishing Returns
 You will always want more than you had before. That’s
  why it’s important to set your boundaries before you
  get in situations that may take you further than you
  want to go.
 Now let’s learn about the “Grandma Rule” and how
  that cute little lady can help you set boundaries...
 French Kissing
 “Other Stuff”
Holding Hands
A.K.A. “The Grandma Rule”
Sexual Progression Chart
 Self-discipline comes from a personal decision to do (or not
  do) something in order to reach a goal.
 How does self-discipline help an athlete? A good
  student? A musician?
 How will self-discipline help you wait to have sex
  until marriage?
   1. I choose not to be at the following locations:
   2. I choose not to be in the following situations:
   3. I choose not to go beyond the following sexual step before

                                END LESSON 6
Lesson 6 Quiz
1.   List 3 characteristics of infatuation.
2.   List 3 characteristics of love.
3.   List 3 steps to becoming “pressure proof”.
4.   What does it mean to “set boundaries”?
       Say It!
The Need to Speak Up
       Lesson 7
“Learning How to Say ‘NO’”
 Watch Video
 Time To Talk
   What words or lines have you heard people use to
    influence someone to have sex?
   What would you say if you were on the receiving end of
    one of these lines?
   Why is it hard to say “no” to someone you care about?
4 Skills to Help You Say NO
#1 Putdowns & Comebacks
1. When friends try to pressure you with putdowns
   give a comeback.
   1st guy: You mean you’re still a virgin?
    2nd guy: I’ve decided to wait so I never have to worry
    about getting a disease.
   1st guy: Everybody’s doing it; what’s wrong with you?
    2nd guy: Everybody’s not doing it. I’m waiting to do it
    the right way, with the right person at the right time
    so I never have any regrets.
#2: Lines & Linebackers
2. When you here a line from someone use a
     Line: Come on. Everybody’s doing It!
      Linebacker: I want to marry someone who is
      inexperienced so we can learn together.
     Line: This is between the two of us; no one will ever
      Linebacker: If you love me, you’ll respect my feelings
      and stop pushing me.
#3: Saying YES-NO-YES
 Your boyfriend/girlfriend makes a suggestion: “No one’s at
  my house all day. Why don’t you come over?”
   First you make a POSITIVE statement- Yes
      “I really like spending time with you.”
   Follow this with a NEGATIVE statement, but don’t put the
    other person down- No.
      “But I’m not sure I trust myself being alone with you.”
   Finally, add a POSITIVE statement that offers an alternative
    – Yes.
      “Let’s go to the mall and hang out with the others.”
 Application
   Use YES-NO-YES to avoid the following suggestion: “Let’s
    take a little detour on our way home.”
#4: Defense and Offense
 When someone puts you on the defense, grab the
  offense instead. Sometimes you need to let the
  person who is pressuring you know how you feel.
  Take the offense by using these phrases:
   When you do…, I feel…
   When you say…, I feel…
 Here’s an example.
   “Look, I really love you, but when you keep pressuring
    me after I say ‘no’, I feel you don’t really care about me.”
   “When you keep pushing me to have sex after I say ‘no’,
    I feel used and angry. Why don’t you show me you care
    about me by respecting me?”
 Definition: Courage means facing difficulties and pressures while remaining firm
  in your beliefs. It takes courage to stand up for abstinence when others seek
  instant gratification.
 Speaking up may cost you a few friends. It may even create some
  problems in your relationship with your girlfriend or boyfriend. How
  would courage help in the following situations?
 You log into your favorite chat room and read the following posts. How
  would you respond to them?
    1. Help! I’m afraid if I tell my boyfriend “no” one more time he’ll break
       up with me. This is the first guy I’ve dated seriously and I don’t want
       to lose him. How can I say “no” to sex without losing him?
    2. My girlfriend keep saying “no” to everything I want to try. At least
       she says “no” with her words, but everything else – her flirting, her
       clothes, her kisses – say, “keep going!” Man, am I confused.
    3. I made a pledge to be abstinent when I was younger and not dating.
       Now, I’m dating, and it’s getting harder and harder to keep that
       pledge. What do I do?

                                          END LESSON 7
Lesson 7 Quiz
1.   Reply to these “putdowns” with a “comeback”.
       a)   You mean you’re still a virgin?
       b)   I can’t believe you haven’t done it yet.
2. List linebackers for the following “lines”:
       a)   Come on. Everybody is doing it.
       b)   If you really love me, then prove it.
       c)   You owe me something for all I’ve done for you.
       d)   We can stop anytime, I promise.
3. Why is it hard to say no to someone you care about?
4. How do you say no to someone you care about?
5. Respond to the following with a yes-no-yes: “No one’s at
   my house all day. Why don’t you come home with me?”
       Show It!
The Need to Be Assertive
         Lesson 8
“Being Assertive”
 Watch Video
 Time To Talk
   How did these teenagers feel pressured?
   How well did they stand up under pressure?
   How were they assertive?
How to Be Assertive
 It’s your right to say “NO” when someone asks you to do something
  you choose not to do.
 5 ways to be assertive with your:
    Head
       Place where you make decisions about your standards, boundaries, and goals.
       How can having standards, boundaries and goals help you be assertive?
    Heart
       Show you care for, respect, and value yourself and others.
       Is there a difference between assertive behavior and aggressive behavior?
    Mouth
       The way you say “NO” in a firm, strong voice. Giving reasons and offering
        alternatives provide different ways of responding to sexual pressure.
    Body Language
       How you hold your body, the way you dress, even the way you stand sends out
        strong messages.
    Feet
       Sometimes the best assertive move you can make is to walk away from the
Time To Experience
 Situation #1 “The Guys”
    Background
       Darin is on the basketball team. His friends are constantly talking about girls
        and sex. Darin has been dating Angel for the past six months and spends a lot
        of time with her. They have chosen to be abstinent.
    Scene
       Darin and two of his friends are talking after school about an upcoming party.
        They ask Darin if he is going, and he says he will have to check with Angel. His
        friends want to know if he’s having sex with Angel since he’s spending so much
        time with her. When Darin explains that he’s not having sex with her, they start
        to put pressure on him.
    Planning
       How should Darin be assertive?
    Evaluation (on a 1-5 scale, where 1 is not so good, and 5 is
       How realistic was Darin?
       How realistic were his friends?
       How could Darin have been better at being assertive?
Situation #2 “After Soccer”
 Girl reads Background and Scene
 Planning
   How should Paula be assertive?
 Evaluation
   How realistic was Paula?
   How realistic were her friends?
   How could Paula have been better at being assertive?
Situation #3: “My Parents Aren’t Home”
 Volunteer to read Background and Scene
 Planning
   How should Steve be assertive?
 Evaluation
   How realistic was Sarah?
   How realistic was Steve?
   How could Steve have been better at being assertive?
Situation #4: “You Love Me, Don’t You?”
 Volunteer to read background and scene
 Planning
   How should Farah be assertive?
 Evaluation
   How realistic was Sonny?
   How realistic was Farah?
   How could Farah have been better at being assertive?
 Choosing the best path takes perseverance to stay sexually abstinent
  until marriage. Perseverance means you stick to it, and it involves:
    Commitment: making a decision and sticking with it.
    Courage: taking a stand every time you say “NO”, even when those
     around you say “yes”. Write down the name of someone to talk
     with about the pressures you face. List the things you want to talk
 Answer the following questions on a separate sheet of
    1.   What have you learned from this unit on Choosing The Best
    2.   How has it changed the way you think about yourself?
    3.   What promises have you made to yourself as a result of this

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