Akhlaq Second Semester 8-5-06 Improving the morals Definition of morals: What is akhlaq? Quality of actions and dealings with oneself, with others, with animate beings, and with inanimate objects. Who do we deal with? 1 – Allah 2 – your own self 3 – others – parents, family, relatives, neighbors, community, and everybody else /intro What is your relationship with Allah? Are you pleased with Allah? Is He pleased with you? Do you love Allah? Abu Bakr said “the issue is whether Allah loves you” What is the akhlaq with yourself? In salat, we say as salamu alaiNA – means includes ourselves also. Are we at peace with ourselves? On the day of judgment, our skin, limbs, body parts will testify against us. Aklaq with parents Are you dutiful to them? People think they are but the real test is to ask your parents. Akhlaq with family Your wife and children. Are you a good companion? Remember the hadith of the Prophet (saw) that the best of you are the best to your wives. Do you educate your children? Teach them their religion? The Prophet (saw) said the best gift you can give to your children is to teach them wudu. Your job is not just financial. Akhlaq with relatives and community. Do you join the kinship? The Prophet (saw) said the one who joins the kinship is not the one who does as they are done to. The one who joins the kinship is the one who creates the bonds after they are being broken i.e. calls when the other hangs up, knocks after the door has been closed, etc. Your community? Are you a good citizen? Do you contribute? Share in people‟s sadness and success? Akhlaq with neighbors? Are you a good neighbor? Do you even know your neighbors? You should be giving them gifts and stuff. /end intro
Obedience to Allah The true Muslim is obedient to Allah (saw) The obedience should be reflected in your actions. Whenever Allah says do, do you do it? Whenever Allah says don‟t do, do you obey? Abdallah ibn masood told his students “do not let Allah find you in a place he has forbidden you to be in, and do not be absent from a place Allah expects you to be.”
Sensitive The true Muslim is sensitive. If he disobeyed Allah, he fears the consequences of his action, even if it‟s a small deed. A sahaba said to some tabi‟ “you are doing some things that you consider trivial and we considered them to be major sins in our time.” Abdallah ibn masood gave the example that the mumin feels that his sins are like a mountain on his shoulder. The hypocrite feels as though they are a fly he swats away. Repentent “and those who when they do an evil thing or wrong themselves, remember Allah and implore forgiveness for their sins – who forgives sins save Allah only?” Pleased with Allah‟s decrees. No matter what happens in this world, you should be pleased with Allah. Your anger will never change anything. It might even make things worse. When you are pleased with Allah, Allah will please you. The true believer can never be upset with the decree of Allah. Muath (ra) on his deathbed felt the stupor of death and the tightening of his body and he prayed “oh Allah, even if you tighten it more, I will be pleased with you.” Umm sulama when her son died said “he is resting. Shouldn‟t an owner take back what belongs to him?” – she understands that these things are all in the decree of Allah. Protect your deen. Allah can replace things like money, children, wealth, people, etc. but if you lose your deen, you may not get it back. Always remember, 1) it could be worse 2) thank Allah the hardship is in your dunya, and not your deen and 3) and thank Allah that your affliction is in this life and not the hereafter. Urwa ibn zubair when he lost his leg said “alhamdulillah, Allah took one part and he left me many parts.” Worship Allah as if you see him Ask yourself when you do something whether Allah is happy with it. 8-12-06 Akhlaq with Allah. Being a servant is the highest status you can get because when Allah described the Prophet (saw) “Praised is he who took his Servant on a Journey through the night” – because being a servant of Allah is the greatest thing. Prayer Are we true servants to Allah with regards to prayer. Are we performing with khushoo or are we hurrying it. It was the light of the Prophet (saw) – it was joyous to him to go to the prayer. Do you get more stressed when we get a flat tire and we‟re late to work or when we are late for prayer. Allah mentioned that salat is a sign of the faith. Reading Quran We spend hours reading the newspaper, etc. The Quran is more of a priority Perform the obligatory Ibadah. Allah said my servant will not come closer to me with anything than what I made obligatory on him. Some people go to taraweeh in Ramadan and then miss fajr in the morning.
Akhlaq with the Self Body, Mind and Soul. 1- Your body is a trust. You will be asked about your body. It is not yours to do with as you wish. Did you use your body to worship Allah or did you use it to abuse people. 2 - Food and Drink – the Prophet (saw) said we do not eat until we are hungry and when we eat we do not fill our stomachs. Sometimes we eat things that even animals do not eat. 3 – health – you will be asked what you did with your health. There is hasanat in being healthy. If your intention is to become healthier and stronger and to worship Allah then you are rewarded with your eating. Look at older people who cannot bow anymore. Use your health while you have it. 4 – Sleep – you should sleep early. The Prophet (saw) said you should not stay up after Isha except to enjoy kinship, seek knowledge, or do ibada. abu ayub the Prophet (saw) disliked sleeping after Asr and talking after Isha 5 – Your mind. Think critically. Do you focus on negative or are you trying to be positive, create, invent, solve problems. 6 – be skillful – be ambitious, etc. 7 – your soul. Do you have a grudge in your heart? The Prophet (saw) said the Muslim does not steal and he does not have hatred in his heart. Sheikh al Islam ibn taimiyyah said “what do my enemies think they can do for me: Wherever you are you worship Allah. If they imprison me I am in seclusion, and I worship Allah more, if they banish me, then I see a new place, and if they kill me I am a martyr.” Remembrance of Allah – how often do we make dhikr. 8 – Appearance – cleanliness. Do people want to sit next to you or do they avoid you. The Prophet (saw) used to use siwak so that people wouldn‟t smell something bad from his mouth. Once a man came to the masjid and he had a bad appearance. The Prophet asked him “did Allah give you money? The man said yes. What kind of money? Allah kinds of money. The Prophet (saw) said “then let this appear in your appearance.” Basically, let the blessing of Allah be shown. Don‟t exaggerate 9-10-06 Akhlaq of the muslim with his parents. You have to have a good relationship with your parents. Modern media teaches us otherwise, that parents are backwards and don‟t understand their children – they label parents as trouble makers “and your lord has decreed that you worship none but him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them “uff”, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honor. “And we have enjoined on man to be good to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: “show gratitude to Me and to my parents.” When saad embraced Islam, he was very dutiful to his mother who said to him “I will not to talk to you until you leave this religion” and she refused to eat - he replied back to her “if you had 1000 souls and you lost them all I would not leave it.” And this ayah was revealed to tell saad to not say the harsh word to his kafir mother. The highest gate to paradise is the father. Your parents are your path to paradise – the question is not whether you are pleased with them, it‟s whether they are pleased with you. Hadith “Paradise is at the feet of your mother.” Sahih muslim “You wont be able to pay back your father, even if he became disabled and you served him for years and years unless you find him a slave, and you purchase him and free him.”
Ibn omar saw a man carrying his mother around the kaabah for tawah and the man was proud of what he had done. He said “see how I pay back my mother?” and ibn omar replied “you did not pay back one contraction.” This is the second largest sin. Shirk is one, disobeying parents is second, and false testimony is third. Story of the man who kicked his father out of his house when the wife insisted she could not live with him – the father cried and said “I didn‟t the same to my father.” A man came and wanted to do jihad and the prophet said “are your parents alive? Then go serve them and that is the great jihad.” Often are parents ask us to do thing One of the companions would not eat with his mother – he said he was too afraid to take the bite that she might have been looking at, so he waits for her to finish eating and then he eats. Children cannot raise their voices over their parents – if you cannot even say uff, how can you yell?
The rights on your children. Many parents today think that if they have provided for their children, then they‟ve done their job – it‟s not true.. Psychologists agree that the house is the first school. Children take from their parents. It‟s just natural. A man came to omar ra complaining that his son was disobedient so omar (ra) brought the son of that man and asked why he was undutiful and the son asked “why are you disobedient?” the son replied, don‟t I have rights on my parents? What are they?” omar responded: Father has to choose a good mother for you, you have the right to a good name, right to be educated well, and the son answered, my father did none of those things. A man came to the Prophet saw crying that he was in need and that his son wouldn‟t help him. the son was brought to the prophet and said my father wants money from me and the prophet responded you and your money belong to your father. Education of children – putting your kids in a good university does not mean that you‟ve done your job to educate your children. Education starts before your children are born by choosing a good mother – the Prophet (saw) said “choose a good vessel for your children.” Set a good example – sheikh says I cannot imagine the father who smokes and asks his child not to smoke. The father who tells his son when he answers the phone “I‟m not here” and then expects his son to answer the phone. A man came to one of the pious predecessors and asked “what‟s the best way to educate my child” and he said “how old is your child?” and the predecessor said “it‟s too late – you should have started earlier” Some parents unfortunately are dictators in the house – do this do that don‟t ask why. Even Allah the Lord of everything told us the reasons for things. The character of parents. Children are a sponge and absorb everything.
9-16-06 Akhlaq of the Muslim with his Wife Islamic ruling on marriage. Marriage is an ibada but also a contract. Why is it a contract? What are the terms? There are rights and responsibilities. Today, maybe divorces are happening because people realize they are not simply dealing with their spouse, they are dealing with Allah. Remember marriage is Ibada. Allah made marriage sunnah. By default, they should marry. Allah describes marriage as among his signs. And all the prophets were married except Isa and Yahya. Allah rewards you for your marriage. Not only is it simply ibada, but you are avoiding sin since you have the option to live outside of Islam. Marriage is not only a sexual relationship between husband and wife. It is also a way to increase the ummah of Muhammad (saw).
How do you choose a suitable spouse the suitable wife: beauty, wealth, lineage, religion, so go for religion. The Prophet said “if the husband looks at her, she pleases him, if he asks her to do something, he obeys, if he‟s absent, she takes care and doesn‟t betray his absence.” How can a man treat his wife well? Help her (aisha said the Prophet used to help us) Gifts (not to just to get something) Don‟t be a fault-finder Be romantic – love her Respect her (sheikh says if you disrespect her once, she‟ll remember) How can a wife treat her husband well? Be kind Be content Protect his honor and wealth “the believing wife she does not keep her husband unpleased with her, until she takes hi hand and she pleases him.” “if I were to command a person to prostrate before another, I would command the wife to prostrate before the husband” Patience There must be patience, you have to adapt to patience. There will always be differences between people. What if you want your wife to listen to the same sheikh as you? Does she have to love exactly what you love? People are different and you have to allow for these differences. The prophet said “she was created from a rib, and the rib is curved, if you want to straighten the curve, it‟ll break” A man once complained about his wife to the prophet and he said divorce her, then the man said that he loved his wife, so the prophet said “then keep her” It is very sad when people terrorize their houses and don‟t make them places of tranquility.
10-08-06 The Muslim with his relatives Why do we even discuss this? is it important or significant? Allah reminds us in the Quran that we have to be kind to our relatives. 4:36. Serve Allah, and join not any partners with him; and do good- to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, those In need, neighbours who are near, neighbours who are strangers, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (ye meet), and what your right hands possess: for Allah loveth not the arrogant, the vainglorious;These ayats that glorify parents were actually revealed to tell newly converted muslims to be good to their non-muslim parents! So it‟s not about treating muslim parents well. Hadith “the person who unites the kinship bond first will be rewarded” Also, remember the hadith that you cannot cut ties with a muslim for more than 3 days? Should be even less time for a relative. Remember that when you are kind to your parents and kin, you are doing ibada So who are your relatives? It can‟t simply be whoever shares blood with you because we are all children of adam. One method: can the person inherit from you? If so, they‟re a relative. Another method: can you marry them ever? If no, they‟re a relative. Relatives divided into two relatives – father is a relative? Why not discussed here? Because he was already mentioned. – there are tiers of importance in relatives Who is more important? Your uncle or brother? (brother) Your son or brother? (son) Rules are: first your parents, then children, wife, then sideways (brother / sister), then parent‟s sideways Are you allowed to pay your needy father zakat? No, if your father is in need you have to spend on him freely from your own wealth. Your needy uncle? Yes he can receive your zakat. Sheikh says we vastly underestimate this ibada of being kind to your kinship. What is the reward for enjoining the ties of kinship? Two ways to see, one is to see the reward and one is to see the punishment for not doing it: “the one who severs the ties of kinship will not enter the Garden” – bukhari “ties of kinship (rahem) is derived from ar-Rahman. My Lord, I have been wronged. My Lord, I have been cut off” (what the ties of kinship will say on the day of judgment) “Allah answers them „are you content that I cut off the one who cuts you off and I maintain connections with the one who maintains connections with you?” “Whoever loves that he be granted more wealth and that his lease of life be prolonged then he should keep good relations with his kith and kin.” (how does this hadith work with Qadr? Whether you tie the kinship bonds is in your qadr and Allah has written what will happen depending on what you choose) “al wasil (the one who joins kinship) is not the one who recompenses the good done to him by his relatives, but al-wasil is the one who keeps good relations with the one who severed the bonds with him.” “a man asked the Prophet my kinship cut off ties with me and I maintain ties with him. The prophet told him to keep doing it and it will be as though you are feeding him the dust of hellfire.” There is no wrong action in which Allah is swifter to punish in this world – in addition to the punishment which He has stored up for the wrongdoer in the Next world – than cutting off ties of kinship and injustice. Sheikh says you don‟t necessarily have to love your kin. You have to keep ties with them no matter what wrong they are doing and eventually you may love them.
The Muslim and his neighbors Allah says to be good to your neighbors in the same ayah 4:36. Serve Allah, and join not any partners with him; and do good- to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, those In need, neighbours who are near, neighbours who are strangers, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (ye meet), and what your right hands possess: for Allah loveth not the arrogant, the vainglorious;Three levels of neighbors. 1) your muslim relative neighbor 2) your muslim neighbor 3) your neighbor “Gibreel continued to recommend to me about treating the neighbors kindly and politely so much so that I thought he would order me to make them as my heirs.” “anybody who believes in Allah and the last day should not harm his neighbor, and anybody who believes in the last day should entertain his guest generously, and anybody who believes in Allah and the last day should talk what is good or keep quiet.”
After midterms 11-04-06 Brotherhood After the battle of yamuk (between muslims and romans in Jordan – many deaths) – I found my cousin on the verge of death and I had some water with me and I asked him if he wanted some water and he motioned yes and then he heard another man moaning in pain – it was saeed ibn al‟as. I asked him if he wanted some water and he said yes and then we heard another man moaning from pain and he told me to go to that man. He preferred that man to himself. I went to that man and he found him dead. I went back to saeed and found him dead. Then I went back to my cousin and I found him dead. This is true brotherhood, these were the students of Mohammad (saw). Sa‟d ibn arrabi‟ & Abdurrahman ibn awf. These were ansar – sa‟d offered half his money and one of his wives to his brother. We live in different times now – people compete in the market and only care about accomplishments and what people can do for them. You will never believer until you love for your brother what you love for yourself. The strongest bonds of faith are to love for the sake of Allah and hate for the sake of Allah. The Prophet taught a man who went to visit a brother in another city. An angel went to him in the road and asked him “is there any reason you are going?” and he said “no I‟m just going ot visit my brother” and the angel said “Allah has told me that your sins are forgiven The seven shaded: One of them is the people who come and go for the sake of Allah. The prophet said that Allah said those who loved one another for My Glory will have pulpits of lights and the Propehts and martyrs will wish that they had the same.
Abu Huraira reported the Propeht said “six are the rights of a muslim over another muslim. It was said to him: Allah‟s messenger, what are these? Thereupon he said: when you meet him, offer him greetings; when he invites you to a feats, accept it. When he seeks your counsel, give it to him, when he sneezes and says: “All praise is due to Allah” you say “yarhamuk Allah” ; and he falls ill you visit him; and when he dies follow his janaza.” Remember, ibn hazm said you can master virtue if you master two things: control your anger, and you love for your brother what you love for yourself. Then he said loving for your brother will lead to justice, you will never violate the right of yoru brother. The hadith doesn‟t‟ say you have to care about your brother, but this was the sunnah. Look at how the prophet used to ask about people and he cared about – the lady who cleaned the masjid and Thabit ibn qays – the Prophet missed him, etc. Omar (ra) on his deathbed was stabbed and he wanted to know what who stabbed him and he said I didn‟t want my opponent on the day of judgment to be a muslim. One of the shuyookh that died 20 years ago. He used to get upset and his mother said “did the muslims get hurt somewhere? Is that why you‟re upset” – he used to always think about other people.
11-11-06 The Muslim with his community Last week we did the muslim with his brother, what is the difference? This is concerning people you don‟t know instead of your brothers that you do no. The muslim is social – he has friends and people like to have him as friends. Musnad of imam ahmad – the Prophet said “a believer is a friendly person, there is no good in the one who is not befriended nor does he have friends” – hadith hasan. Hadith of the Prophet Remember what ibn hazm said “beware of being described with _____” Also remember what ibn hazm said, “treat people like fire” – you need people, but don‟t get too close for too long or you get burned. The Muslim socializes in balance and for a reason. But don‟t be opportunist where you just talk to someone to get something Ibn khaldun said the human being is civilized by his nature – he needs socialization and to live with others. One of the qualities of the believer is that he is sincere. The Prophet (saw) said “religion is sincere advice” (ad-deen an-naseeha) the companions asked “to whom” and the Prophet responded “to Allah his book, his messenger, the muslim leaders and the generality of Muslims” What is naseeha? Wishing all that is good for people. asl an-nasih – like sweetness of honey. Your intention is not to be thought a scholar or learned or wise. Your intention is sincerely just to help people. He doesn‟t cheat, deceive, or stab in the back. Prophet (saw) said “whoever bears arms against us is not one of us and whoever cheats us is not one of us.” Story of the man who was selling grain and the inside was wet. The prophet asked him “what is this?” and the man said that the rain came and the Prohpet reposnded “tell the people for he who deceives us is not one of us.”
Great hadith: Prophet said “do not hate one another and do not envy one another and do not turn your backs on one another. Be slaves of Allah and brothers. It is not allowed for a muslim to avoid his brother for more than three days.” Sahih muslim: Do not envy one another, do not defraud one another, do not despise one another, do not turn your baks on one another and let none of you make an offer over the [unconcluded] offer of his brother. Be slaves of Allah and brothers. Every Muslim is a brother to every Muslim. He does not oppress him, nor betray him, nor deceive him, nor despise him. Taqwa is right here. He pointed to his heat and said three times. It is sufficient evil for a Muslim to look down on his brother Muslim. Every Muslim is sacred to every other Muslim – his blood, his property and his self-esteem. Imagine if you live in a society where everyone picks on the other! Everyone waits for the other to make a mistake so they can talk about! Another great haidth (some scholars say it is daeef) Narrated abdallah ibn amr we were sitting with the Prophet and he said “one of the people of paradise will now come to you” and a man of the ansar come along. The next day the prophet said the same thing and the man came. On the third day, the Prophet again said the same thing and the same man appeared again. Afterwards, amr went to him and oberserved him for 3 days. After 3 days amr asked him about what the prophet said and the man said I have nothing above what you see. And then amr left – the man went back to him and said “there is one thing I do that maybe other people don‟t and I think that might be it. Every night before I go to bed, I forget all the wrong that people have done to me” and amr said that is it. This is a great hadith. People hold grudges for years. Can you imagine someone hurt you and tomorrow you go to him as if nothing happened? We should be like children who fight and then 5 minutes later they play. They have nothing evil like this in their hearts. Faith and envy do not go together in the heart of the Prophet (saw). Sheikh says honey and poison cannot be mixed in the same pot. Homework – read the last 12 ayats of surah furqan – description of the servants of the most merciful. From the Quran 5:1 “Oh you who believe, fulfill your obligations” “and fulfill engagements” sura isra “fulfill the covenant of Allah when you have entered into it” “oh you who believe, who say you that which you do not do? Grievously odious is it in the sight of Allah that you say that which you do not do” surah saf The one who betrays there will be a banner and it will say “this is the punishment of so and so” Last ayats of sura furqaan: 60. When it is said to them, "Adore ye ((Allah)) Most Gracious!", They say, "And what is ((Allah)) Most Gracious? shall we Adore that which Thou commandest us?" and it increases their flight (from the truth). 61. Blessed is He who made constellations In the skies, and placed therein a Lamp and a moon giving light; 62. And it is He who made the night and the Day to follow Each other: for such As have the will to celebrate His praises or to Show their gratitude. 63. And the servants of ((Allah)) Most gracious are those who walk on the earth In humility, and when the ignorant address them, They say, "Peace!"; 64. Those who spend the night In adoration of their Lord prostrate and standing; 65. Those who say, "Our Lord! avert from us the wrath of Hell, for its wrath is indeed an affliction grievous,66. "Evil indeed is it As an abode, and As a place to rest in";
67. Those who, when They spend, are not extravagant and not niggardly, but hold a just (balance) between those (extremes); 68. Those who invoke not, with Allah, any other god, nor slay such life As Allah has made sacred except for just Cause, nor Commit fornication; - and any that does This (Not only) meets punishment. 69. (but) the penalty on the Day of Judgment will be doubled to him, and He will dwell therein In ignominy,70. Unless He repents, believes, and works righteous deeds, for Allah will change the evil of such persons into good, and Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful, 71. And Whoever repents and does good has truly turned to Allah with an (acceptable) conversion;72. Those who witness no falsehood, And, if They pass by futility, They pass by it with honourable (avoidance); 73. Those who, when They are admonished with the Signs of their Lord, droop not down at them As if They were deaf or blind; 74. And those who pray, "Our Lord! grant unto us wives and offspring who will be the comfort of Our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous." 75. Those are the ones who will be rewarded with the highest place In heaven, because of their patient constancy: therein shall They be met with salutations and Peace, 76. Dwelling therein;- How beautiful an abode and place of rest! 77. Say (to the Rejecters): "My Lord is not uneasy because of you if ye call not on him: but ye have indeed rejected (Him), and soon will come the inevitable (punishment)!"