A letter of complaint to a software house
Dear Sir, Last year I upgraded my computer from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0. Unfortunately, the program doesn't work properly. It's incompatible with the financial software, so that now I have very limited access to applications Outfit, and Jewellery and Flowers won't start at all. All three applications worked perfectly with Boyfriend 5.0. Besides that, after having installed Husband 1.0 the computer automatically uninstalled several fun applications, like Cruise, Dinner and dancing, A Night at the theatre, etc. Instead of those, now there are some new applications installed (not belonging to the same category), like Poker, Saturday in front of TV and Mess all around 2000. By starting the program Conversation 8.0 a window pops up, warns me about an error and informs me that I can't have access to some of the folders. When I retry, the whole system collapses. Under no circumstances the program performs functions: Cleaning the house or Help in the kitchen. I've tried to solve the problem with the patch Nagging, but this multifunctional program which used to work perfectly now gives very limited results. Please, help me. A misfortunate user.
The reply of the technical service
This is a typical problem which female users come across, but it arises not from malfunction of their computers but from their misbeliefs. A lot of our female users upgrade their systems from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0, That is a crucial mistake. Namely, Boyfriend 5.0 is a fun pack, while Husband 1.0 is an operative system designed in such a way as to perform as few applications as possible. In addition to this, many program files can be installed only once a year, under numerous specific circumstances, because memory of Husband 1.0 is very limited. That's why we suggest that you think about buying new software which would make your applications work better. It seems that one of most efficient softwares is His mother's kitchen 18.1, but you might also consider Sexy underwear 1.1. When used together, these two programs make Husband 1.0 develop features like Fixing things in the house1.0, Best friend 7.6, Evenings out 1.2, Romance 1.0, and even Gym 1.1. Our opinion is that it would be best for you not to install the program Mother-in-law 1.0 under any circumstances, because this application gives terminal command to Husband 1.0, involving it in a net where only Fishing 9.4 and Hunting 5.2 work properly. When that happens, the next inevitable step is starting the program Beer 6.0, which causes generating files named Beer belly 9.1 and Snoring XP, which are almost impossible to remove from the system. Best of luck, Technical service
(TAKEN FROM A CIRCULAR EMAIL)