(by Sailor Taichichi Vegeta)
Bringing a whole new meaning to the phrase “dressed to kill”… Stuff in parentheses is seen through the camera‟s eyes.
Disclaimer Tails: We don‟t own DBZ. Me: We also don‟t own Lady Morganite, Master Onyx or Honorable Sapphire, or the fashion industry. Tails: I thought those were gemstones. Me: They are. They‟re also the code names of three certain people. Tails: I‟m not even gonna ask…
(Zoom into a city block where a TRL-like scene is taking place -a pink-haired girl in a purple headband is interviewing two people. She wears blue jeans, a white T-shirt, black boots and blue-tinted sunglasses. Silver-rimmed aquamarine triangle earrings twinkle almost as brightly as the green eyes that are fixed on the people she is talking to, an old man and his pastyfaced assistant. The guys are wearing almost identical black, white and orange suits with black vests and weird hats. The pale guy‟s hat is a single dark spike; the old man‟s hat is a tall black affair with the insignia of the Red Ribbon Army, which also shows up on the pale guy‟s vest.) TV Hostess: Welcome back to Fashion Buzz! Lady Morganite has returned and today we‟re talking to Dr. Rakim Gero and his assistant Hayden! TV Audience: Yaaay! Lady Morganite: Dr. G, what‟s going down these days? Dr. G: Well, I‟m working on a clothing line. Morganite: Another clothing line? I remember your last one…the Red Ribbon Military line, right? Dr. G: Right. I notice you‟re wearing one of the products. Morganite: Well, so are ya‟ll! Whatcha gonna call the new line? Dr. G: The Cyborg Line. Morganite: Y‟got high hopes for it? Dr. G: I‟ll say! It‟ll KNOCK THEM DEAD, right Hayden? Hayden: *terribly high voice* Yes, it‟ll BLOW THEM AWAY! (Hayden and Dr. G start firing ki blasts. Morganite screams and dives off screen; the audience follows suit. Buildings disintegrate in the background, and the camera heads for the nearest car and gets underneath it.)
Morganite: *spitting out dirt* What‟s your problem? I almost DIED there! Dr. G: Well, I said the new line would KNOCK THEM DEAD, right Hayden? Hayden: Yes, and I said it would BLOW THEM AWAY! (Hayden and Dr. G resume firing ki blasts, and the cameraman, who has come from under the car, hurries back underneath it. A chunk of debris bounces off of the lens.) Morganite: Didja have to go and do it twice?! Dr. G: But we saidMorganite: I know, I know! You said the new line would KNOCK THEM DEAD and Hayden said it would BLOW THEM AWAY! Hayden + G: Right! (The ki blasts start up for the third time. Morganite scrambles under the car with the cameraman, but the car is blown away. She covers her head and joins the cameraman in screaming until the ki blasts stop.) Morganite: CUT IT OUT ALREADY! Dr. G: But(Morganite claps a hand over both of their mouths.) Morganite: See what you‟ve done to my poor audience? *gives mike to random victim and his cat* What‟s your name, fella? Random Victim: I‟m Yamucha. And my chest hurts. Morganite: I‟ll bet it does, seeing as how you‟ve got a hole through it the size of Muscle Tower. Dr. G: Hey, how did you know about Muscle Tower? Morganite: Oh, I get around… Meanwhile at Capsule Corp., the Z crew (plus me on a visit) has finished Buruma‟s leftover sukiyaki (see Toran‟kusu Saga) and is lounging around in the living room, watching an old James Bond movie. Muten Roshi, since the *romantic* part is already over, is fast asleep on the floor with a magazine over his face. Gokuh is still having his heart attack and is also lying on the floor. Piccolo comes in with a large bottle of sparkling water and flops down onto the sofa –and the remote. The channel changes to Fashion Buzz. Kuririn: Hey! We were watching that! Piccolo: GRR! Kuririn screams and runs behind the sofa, away from Piccolo. Buruma: Wait a minute. Isn‟t that Yamucha and Puar on TV? Oolong: Where? Buruma: Down on the ground with the hole through his chest. Lady Morganite‟s talking to him. Vegeta: Hey, I never got to be on TV! Piccolo: Me neither! Kuririn: *from behind sofa* You were too busy chasing after sparkling water… Piccolo: SHUT UP! Kuririn: Aaah! *hides again* Piccolo: I know where that street is! Come on, Vegeta, let‟s go get us some publicity! Piccolo and Vegeta fly straight through the ceiling. Gohan: Shouldn‟t we go after them before they wreck something else? Buruma: How are we gonna stop them? Oolong: You‟re having Vegeta‟s kid, aren‟t you? Send him on a guilt trip or something. Buruma smacks Oolong.
(Back at the scene of the TV show attacks, Morganite is trying to get Dr. G to disclose more fashion secrets while Hayden plays 21 on the ground with Puar and an injured Yamucha, and Piccolo and Vegeta make fools of themselves in the background.) Piccolo: *waving* HI MOM! Vegeta: You idiot, you haven‟t got a mom! You came out of an egg! Really, you‟re getting almost as bad as Kakarotto! Piccolo: I can‟t be THAT dumb, can I? Vegeta: Hm. I guess you‟ve got a point. Piccolo + Vegeta: *shudder* Yamucha: I‟m sick of playing 21. Let‟s play strip poker. Puar: Lord Yamucha! Hayden: Ew! No way! Yamucha: Hold up. You‟re an android, right? You can take off a foot or something instead of clothes. Puar: That sounds okay. Hayden: I‟ll do it! (Hayden loses a pinky.) Hayden: You‟re good. Yamucha: I get plenty of practice out in the desert. Puar: Lord Yamucha, since I‟m your best friend, I don‟t have to pay, right? Yamucha: Yeah, I guess not. Puar: Yay! Yamucha: You can work off your debt by fixing my meals! Puar: WHAT?! Yamucha: And I better not find any hairballs either… (The Z crew shows up. Gokuh goes over to Yamucha.) Gokuh: Hey Yamucha, what‟re you doing? Yamucha: Gambling. Gokuh: Gambling is bad. It wastes your time and your money, and it can turn into a disease. Piccolo: OH NO, GOKUH‟S PREACHING! NO ONE IS SAFE! Vegeta: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! Piccolo: HIDE THE WOMEN AND CHILDREN! Vegeta: TO THE BOMB SHELTERS! (A little watch on Piccolo‟s arm starts beeping and flashing red lights everywhere.) Piccolo‟s Watch: PREACHING ALERT! PREACHING ALERT! COVER YOUR EARS! Piccolo + Vegeta: AAAAAAAAAAAH! Dr. G: What‟s that all about? Morganite: Like I‟m supposed to know. (While all of this chaos is going on, Yamucha has won so many times that all that‟s left of Hayden is a leg, his nose and a couple fingers. A tall stack of papers sits beside him –they‟re IOUs from Puar.) Yamucha: I win –AGAIN. Ya‟ll are pathetic! Puar: That isn‟t what you said last week when I was the only one you could play with! Yamucha: That‟s not true. I could always play with Oolong. Puar: But he‟s worse than I am… Yamucha: True, true.
Dr. G: This is going nowhere. Would you like to see some of the prototypes for the new clothing line? Morganite: That would be great! –But where‟s Hayden? Hayden: *now without his nose* You cheated! Yamucha: I won that fair and square! You‟re just mad because you can‟t walk now! Hayden: I can‟t walk anymore anyway, thanks to you! (Hayden‟s remaining fingers jump up and poke Yamucha in the eyes.) Yamucha: AAAAAH! WHY I OUGHTA(Yamucha starts to throttle the rest of the body parts.) Dr. G: Well, looks like he can‟t come. Follow me. (Dr. G flies off. Morganite and the cameraman hurry to one of the three surviving air cars, where an auburn-haired girl in a blue kimono is reading Steam Detectives (A/N: Long live Inspector Narutaki!), and they hop in.) Morganite: He‟s gonna show us an exclusive! Step on it, Honorable Sapphire! Honorable Sapphire: Will do! (The car flies off after Dr. G.) Piccolo: Great. Now I‟ll never get on TV. Toran‟kusu: Well, the real reason we came here is to stop those androids! Me: I‟m with you! Tenshinhan: So where are the androids? Everyone: … Kuririn‟s cell phone rings. Kuririn: Hello? Muten Roshi: Hello, Kuririn. I need you to do something for me. Kuririn: We‟re kind of busy chasing killer androids right now. Me: If we can find „em! Muten Roshi: Well that‟s kind of what this is about. You see… *flashback* The Z crew has already left. Muten Roshi is left alone in the living room, still snoring. Suddenly, the phone rings. Muten Roshi: *yawn* Hello? Tsurusen‟nin: Roshi! Turn to channel 56 quick! Muten Roshi: Tsurusen‟nin? What do you want? How do you even know where I am? Tsurusen‟nin: That‟s not important! Just turn! Muten Roshi: It‟s already up there…Say! It‟s that cute thing Lady Morganite! Thanks, man! *drools* Tsurusen‟nin: Yes, I know. Look in the background. Muten Roshi: It‟s the Z crew! Tsurusen‟nin: That‟s right. I want you to call Tenshinhan, Chaozu and –whoever that fellow of yours is and have them get Morganite‟s autograph/signed photo for me! Oh, and make sure it‟s also got the one who drives the car…Honorable Sapphire. Muten Roshi: What‟s in it for me? Tsurusen‟nin: If you‟re smart, you‟ll have them get two. And don‟t you DARE keep them both – if you do I‟ll bribe whoever‟s writing this and have her drop something nasty on your house!
Muten Roshi: That isn‟t fair! Tsurusen‟nin: That‟s just the beginning… *end flashback* Kuririn: What‟s that got to do with the androids? Muten Roshi: Haven‟t you guys figured it out yet? Those „fashion designers‟ Morganite just went with were wearing the Red Ribbon Army symbol! They‟re the killer androids! So if you follow her for me and defeat them, you‟ll make all of us happy! Vegeta: You mean to say the old man and the fat pale thing we saw were the killer androids? Piccolo: I don‟t believe it… … Piccolo + Vegeta: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Toran‟kusu: They didn‟t look like that in my timeline… Kuririn: Maybe you screwed up some way. Toran‟kusu: I HATE screwing up! Come on, everybody! After those androids! Gohan: Where‟s Yamucha? The Z crew looks and sees Yamucha inside of a store that says "PARTS," passing a large bag over the counter and accepting an equally large wad of cash. Puar: Poor android… Yamucha: *coming out* Hey, who wants to help me bury my treasure? Gokuh: Oooh, oooh! I wanna play pirate! Sorry guys, you‟ll have to do without me! Everyone: *sweatdrop* Me: Well, it looks like we‟re minus two players today… Vegeta: You‟ll make up for one of them. Me: I don‟t wanna die! I only came here to get a closer look at your kid! Vegeta: “My kid” is headed after the killer androids, and that‟s where you‟re heading too. Me: Since you asked so nicely… The Z crew (minus Gokuh, Yamucha, and Puar) takes off into the air after the androids. After doing some looking, some looking, and a bit more looking, we all give up. Piccolo: I don‟t get it…I can sense their ki, but I don‟t see anything except for clouds and birds. Gohan: Maybe they flew under the clouds… Everyone: YEAH! So everyone heads under the clouds. (Meanwhile, Dr. G has already done this, and, instructing Sapphire to fly close to the earth, lands in the passenger seat and proceeds to show off as the air car goes down a sunny road lined with palm trees. The cameraman, who has been sitting on the hood of the air car filming Dr. G in flight, is now forced to turn around and film the windshield instead –or rather, who‟s behind it. Hip-hop music starts to play.) Cameraman: This is bad for my health! Dr. G: QUIET! Shh! Hush your mouth! Silence while I spit it out(Dr. G spits out of the window.) Dr. G: -in your face! Cameraman: That wasn‟t funny(The glob of spit flies back and hits the camera lens.) Dr. G: Open your mouth, give you a taste!
Cameraman: *tries to protest, is cut off* Dr. G: HOLLER! Ain‟t no stopping me! Copywritten so don‟t copy me! Ya‟ll doing sloppily! And ya‟ll can‟t come close to me! Cameraman: *gives up* Dr. G: I know you hear me now! I know you feel me now! I‟m screaming loud and proud! Dr. G‟s gonna blow it down! People don‟t play me now! In and out of town! I‟m the strongest „droid around! With my crazy sound! Gohan: Do you see anything? Piccolo: Just some air car. Let‟s go back above the clouds… Morganite + Sapphire: Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur get ur get ur freak on! Dr. G: YES! Morganite + Sapphire: Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur freak on! Get ur get ur get ur freak on! Cameraman: *sigh* Dr. G: Ichi, ni, san, shi…And we‟re here! Welcome to my super-secret laboratory! (Dr. G gestures towards a humongous chalet with an elaborate fountain in the front and a large neon sign reading “THA CRIB LAB.” Sapphire stops the car and they all get out and head inside.) Morganite: Wow, this is a great place! Master Onyx, make sure you‟re getting all this! Master Onyx AKA Cameraman: Will do. Sapphire: Your last clothing line must have netted some big fat profits to pay for a lab this nice. Dr. G: Nah, I had some friends in the Red Ribbon Army and they pulled a couple strings for me. (They finally come to the room where “the prototypes” are. There‟s a lot of computers and three coffin-like chambers. Dr. G goes up to the chamber in the middle and cracks his knuckles.) Morganite: What are you doing? Dr. G: You need a password to open the chambers. Now let‟s see, what was it…Ah yes! ALOHOMORA! … Everyone: *sweatdrop* Dr. G: That‟s not it? Okay…OPEN SESAME! … Dr. G: Um…OPEN SESAME STREET! … Dr. G: ABRA-KADABRA! … Sapphire: Are you sure you even remember the password? Dr. G: Of course I do. PICCOLO! … Dr. G: OK, maybe I need a bit of inspiration… (Dr. G takes out some capsules and throws one on the ground. Inside there‟s a mug of coffee that bears a strange resemblance to engine oil.) Dr. G: *swallows* Ah, that‟s better. *ahem* SHAZAM! … Dr. G: Need more inspiration!
(Dr. G starts chugging the coffee like crazy.) Onyx: Anyone got the time? Morganite: Good thing this line of work can take all day, „cause we‟ll sure need it… Dr. G: ALAKAZAM! Everyone: *sigh* Meanwhile, the Z crew is lost. Looking for a secret laboratory can be tough. Tenshinhan: I‟ve had it with this spread-out-and-search crap. I haven‟t found squat! Vegeta: That goes double for me! Piccolo: Let‟s mutiny and go home and watch the game! Me: I‟ll bring the wings! Gohan: I found something. Vegeta: Let‟s see it! Gohan: I‟m warning you, I don‟t think it‟s what we‟re looking for… Gohan moves some bushes aside and leads everyone through a tunnel into a secret laboratory. Toran‟kusu: Way to go, Gohan! You did it! Gohan: No I didn‟t… Dexter: DEE-DEE! GET OUT OF MY LABORATORY! Everyone: … Gohan: I told you… So we move back out. Toran‟kusu: Hey, you‟re the one writing this. Can‟t you make it any easier? Me: Sorry, I can‟t even do it for you. I‟ve got an audience to please, so I‟ve got to play dumb with the rest of you guys. Vegeta: *powering up* Can this audience bring you back, because if you don‟t cooperateMe: You can‟t kill me in this fic! I‟ll turn you into a lizard! No…even worse, I‟ll tell you what‟s up with Buruma. Vegeta: *looking scared* No…please… I pick up a bottle of water (Dasani™, of course ^_^ *gets paid $200*) and pour it into a large basin that just happens to be sitting out there for some strange reason. Me: Look into the mirror… Vegeta looks into the mirror and sees Buruma in the hospital, holding a kid with purple hair…and a TAIL. Vegeta: NOOOOOOOOOOO! I‟M A FATHER! Tenshinhan: I‟d like to know how that thing got out here in the first place. Me: Don‟t look at me. Gohan: Well, I‟m reading this book… Elsewhere… Galadriel: Celeborn, I don‟t ever want you to hire those house cleaners again, do you hear me? They‟ve made off with half of the city! Celeborn: I know! My golf clubs are gone! Galadriel: Who CARES about your stupid clubs? I can‟t find my mirror! Uh…okay… Toran‟kusu: I guess anything can happen in fanfiction… Me: Hey, why don‟t we ask over there for directions? So we all head over to “THA CRIB LAB” and Toran‟kusu knocks on the door.
… Vegeta: Nobody‟s home. Piccolo: Why don‟t we loot the place? Vegeta: I like the way you think, Namek-seijin! Piccolo and Vegeta fly up to the very top of the building and start trying to remove the platinum-and-diamond rotunda. Vegeta: Man, this stuff is heavier than it looks! That Nelly guy must have a pretty strong neck! Piccolo: I feel something movingThe roof falls in. The rest of us hurry through the hole, which happens to be right above the doorway to the prototype chamber. Toran‟kusu: There‟s something behind that door…I can feel it… So we break down the door and findDr. G: *gulp* POOF! *gulp* YAZOO! *gulp* KA-BLAM! *gulp* BADDA-BING BADDABANG BADDA-BOOM! *gulp* AVADA KEDAVRA! *gulp* VENUS LOVE & BEAUTY SHOCK! *gulp* TWO FRIES SHORT OF A HAPPY MEAL! *gulp* A NOISY NOISE ANNOYS AN OYSTER! *gulp* VOULEZ-VOUS COUCHER AVEC MOI CE SOIR! *gulp* SACRED LIPLINER LILY RAINBOW! *gulp* GUESS WHO‟S BACK, BACK AGAIN! SHADY‟S BACK, TELL A FRIEND! *gulp* Everyone: *sweatdrop* Me: Somehow I don‟t think we‟re in the right lab, what with the 68 empty coffee cups scattered on the floor and all… Toran‟kusu: No, I can see the Red Ribbon insignia on his vest. Piccolo: But he‟s got his back to us. Toran‟kusu: Okay, I looked at that! Toran‟kusu points at a framed photo of Dr. G, Red Soosei and Black Attendant wearing fur coats, nice suits, fancy hats, alligator shoes and carrying diamond-headed canes, and looking very tipsy. Everyone: … Dr. G: Oh, NOW I remember! MELLON! The sky turns red. Dark clouds begin to swirl. Lightning flashes and thunder rumbles. The wind picks up to a hundred miles an hour. The ocean forms waves as high as mountains. The earth cracks and shakes. Doors begin to open. But they‟re the doors to an ancient mine, not the capsules in Dr. G‟s lab. Dr. G: I could‟ve sworn that was the password to something! #)&%*&<_)$! Toran‟kusu: All right, android. The jig is up! Dr. G: Noooo! I didn‟t even get to show off the new bling-blinging platinum-plated electron microscope I bought at the science convention yet! The middle coffin starts to open. Dr. G: Oh, that is the password! Bling-bling! Bling-bling! Bling-bling! Bling-bling! Voice: Okay okay, gramps. We‟re awake already! Everyone: Huh? Two of the coffins have opened, and their contents are now visible to everyone. A darkhaired guy is standing in front of the middle one, wearing blue and white sneakers, green socks, blue jeans, a gunbelt, a black shirt over a white one, and an orange bandanna. His friendThe Contents of the Coffin on the Right: I‟m his SISTER!
My bad. Anyway, she‟s wearing brown boots, a blue jean vest and skirt over a white shirt/black shirt and black pants, and gold earrings. Both androids have the same narrow blue eyes and the same chin-length hair, except his sister‟s is blonde instead of black. The RR brand name shows up on the guy‟s shirt and the back of his sister‟s vest. Dr. G: Allow me to introduce the models for my new Cyborg Line, the siblings Rico and Bo‟quisha! Rico: I can‟t BELIEVE you called us that! Bo‟quisha: I feel so hurt! Z crew: *cracks up* Piccolo: Some killer androids! *snort* Bo‟quisha: They‟re not even taking us seriously! Didn‟t you give us any REAL names? Dr. G: Well, you were also prototypes numbers 17 and 18… Onyx: Did you say 17? At this point all three of the Fashion Buzz personnel fall on their faces with their arms straight out pointing at Rico AKA 17. FBP: IT‟S JUUNANAGOU! Rico: Huh? The FBP pick him up and set him on their shoulders. The camera has fallen on the floor, and we can see that Onyx is a guy with spiky black hair in a red and black gi. Sapphire: WE LOVE YOU JUUNANAGOU! Rico: Sweet! I‟ve already got a fan base! Bo‟quisha: I want a fan base! Vegeta: *blushing* We‟ll be your fans… Z crew: *blushing* Yeah! Bo‟quisha: I want a fan base with girls! I hate guys! Tenshinhan: 18, why do you hate guys? Bo‟quisha: Because they‟re lazy and smelly and all they think about is sports and food! Toran‟kusu + Gohan: AW SNAP! I guess at this point I‟d better play “Start the Commotion”… Dr. G: NO NO NO! IT‟S ALL WRONG! Me: *feeling a tiny bit sorry for a fellow scientist* What‟s wrong? Dr. G: They‟re supposed to kill you guys, not provide a basis for entertainment! Rico: *enjoying his newfound fame* I thought you said we were supermodels! Dr. G: I lied. Bo‟quisha: BUT I WANT A FAN BASE! In her rage, Android #18 kicks the unopened coffin. A guy with spiky red hair emerges. He‟s wearing green armor (with the RR logo, of course) over a black suit and green boots, and he‟s holding a teddy bear. Everyone: Aww… Dr. G: You weren‟t supposed to do that! I wasn‟t finished with Fabio yet! Bo‟quisha: Fabio? That‟s worse than what I got! Rico: So does this mean I don‟t get to wear Fubu for reduced prices? Dr. G: As if! Rico: I WANNA WEAR FUBU! Bo‟quisha: AND I WANT A FAN BASE! Dr. G: That‟s too bad! Now both of you shut up!
#17 + #18: WE DON‟T THINK SO! The android siblings jump on their creator and beat him to a mechanical pulp. Tenshinhan: Hey, we didn‟t even have to do a thing to get rid of the old guy. Vegeta: What about those two? Gohan: I think they‟re harmless. Rico: Do you really? You know you‟re gonna pay for laughing at us. Gohan: Aw, what can you do to us? *3 hours later* Piccolo: OH KAMI MY BACK HURTS! Toran‟kusu: I can‟t feel my leg! Vegeta: Still think they‟re harmless, mop top? Gohan: Oh, shut up! Morganite: Oh dear, we‟re out of fighters! Looks like we‟ll have to recycle! The FBP has been taking snapshots of the siblings in action while Fabio AKA #16 watches “Bambi” on Sapphire‟s portable TV (“Anything for a friend of Juunanagou!”). Nobody has noticed Kuririn or me yet, so we just sit and wait for our turn. Kuririn is making out his will. I didn‟t bring enough paper. Rico kicks Tenshinhan in the back and waves. SNAP! Bo‟quisha punches Gohan in the face and gives a peace sign. SNAP! Rico knees Vegeta in the stomach and sticks out his tongue. SNAP! Bo‟quisha steps on Toran‟kusu‟s head and blows a kiss at the camera. SNAP! Rico blasts Piccolo and clasps his fists above his head. SNAP! Bo‟quisha: I‟m tired of beating on the kid. Let me have a go at the green guy! Rico: *twisting Piccolo‟s arm* Naaaah. He‟s too much fun! Bo‟quisha: *breaks Toran‟kusu‟s sword over her knee in frustration* First you get the fan base, then you hog the green guy! It‟s not fair! I wanna have some fun too! Rico: You can have the prince of all something-or-other. 17 hands Vegeta over by his hair. 18 proceeds to strangle him. Bo‟quisha: Hey, tormenting this one is fun! *strangles harder* Vegeta: Ack! Onyx: I‟m afraid that won‟t do. Just look at that blue tongue –it clashes horribly with the scenery. Here, use this one instead! Onyx takes Vegeta away and throws Kuririn at 18. So now “Start the Commotion” quits playing and “Love at First Sight” starts playing instead. Bo‟quisha: Wow! Check the weather channel, „cause my temperature‟s rising fast! Hold that thought… “It‟s Raining Men”…. Kuririn: Where have you been all my life? Vegeta: *coughing* I don‟t believe this… Bo‟quisha: I‟m sorry, but the photo shoot will have to end. I can‟t hurt someone this cute!
Kuririn: *blush* I‟m so glad I didn‟t have to fight you! Rico: *beats the last bit of life out of Tenshinhan* Aw shucks! Now we haven‟t got anything else to destroy! Fabio: And the movie‟s gone off! Kuririn: *tongue is wagging* My buddy Gokuh would love to spar with you, and he‟s got tons of kiddie moviesVegeta: And a kiddie IQ! Kuririn: -and his wife is really quick at sending out mail. *blush* Like…wedding invitations? *looks at 18* Bo‟quisha: What are we waiting for? Let‟s find Gokuh! Kuririn: He‟s over there someplace. *points* Goodbye, miss. Bo‟quisha: Go right ahead and call me honey! *kiss* Goodbye. Fabio and Bo‟quisha start to fly off. Rico turns to the FBP. Rico: These are to keep you guys from following us. Here. Rico gives Onyx a stuffed Shadow the Hedgehog, gives Morganite a stuffed Tao Pai Pai, and gives Sapphire a stuffed Piccolo. FBP: THANK YOU JUUNANAGOU! Rico: No problem. Hope you enjoy. Rico flies off with the others. Gohan: We gotta go home and warn my dad! Kuririn: And find the wedding invitations and the kiddie movies that Chi Chi keeps in storage! So the Z crew goes over to the Son house, but all they find is a locked door and a note that says, “Went to Muten Roshi‟s to play pirate with Yamucha. Gokuh.” Kuririn: Oh, no! We have to get over there and get the key from Chi Chi so I can get popcorn and movies for my new friends! Piccolo: Can we get sparkling water too? I‟m really thirsty! Toran‟kusu: I think there‟s some up at the Tenka‟i. Piccolo: LATER! Piccolo heads over to the Tenka‟i. Mr. Popo is showing Kami how to break dance, but he‟s too fat and Kami‟s too stiff and they aren‟t having much luck. Piccolo: „Sup? I‟m thirsty. Kami: *leg stuck behind head* I‟m afraid there‟s not much I can do right now. Will you untangle me if I show you where it is? Piccolo: Fair enough. Kami: It‟s in the basement, behind a big cardboard box that leads to a secret tunnel that ends up in Dick Cheney‟s living room. So then you go out to the tool shed and you‟ll be taken to an underwater route with a nice view of Atlantis, but don‟t mind the sharks because the one with the pink hairbow is going to swallow you and in one of its kidneys you‟ll find a transporter that leads to the tallest area of the Amazon rainforest. And then you jump in some quicksand and you‟ll come out at Six Flags… *2 hours later* Kami: …and once you come out of the tundra passage, you‟ll find it in a blue plastic bag. Piccolo: You mean a bag like the one over there? Everyone turns and looks.
Kami: So THAT‟S where it leads! –I mean, how did that get out here? Mr. Popo: It was going to be a reward if you could make it all the way through “Woop There It Is,” but I can see that‟s not going to happen any time soon… Kami: Nonsense! Kami tries to break dance again but only tangles himself up even worse than he was earlier. Piccolo: All right! Piccolo grabs the bag and starts to leave. Kami: Aren‟t you going to help me? Piccolo: Are you nuts? I got what I came for! Kami: Now that isn‟t fair! Kami manages to hop over to Piccolo and bites him on the leg. A struggle starts, and they somehow end up fused –in Piccolo‟s body, of course. Piccolo-with-an-upgrade: Oh well. *drinks sparkling water* Meanwhile at the Kame House, the Z crew has gathered to warn Gokuh of the impending doom and give Muten Roshi his delivery. Muten Roshi: Well, have you got it? Gohan: Got what? Muten Roshi: My picture! Z crew: Uh…well, we…er… Me: Here you go. Vegeta: See, Kakarotto? Even this onna can do her job and you‟re out here playing pirate while we get beat up by killer androids! Me: Some of us didn‟t get beat up, right Kuririn? Kuririn: Right! The picture shows a grinning Cyborg Trio and FBP all gathered around Kuririn and me, who are giving peace signs. It‟s signed “With Love From the FBP, the Cyborg Trio, And Kuririn and Tai.” Muten Roshi: Hey baby, you take a nice picture! Come here… Me: Not on your life, you dirty old man! Muten Roshi: Aww… The phone rings. Toran‟kusu picks it up. Toran‟kusu: Hello? Buruma: Hello son. I found this picture and I‟d like to show it toMuten Roshi elbows Toran‟kusu aside, turns on the fax machine, and switches the phone to a party line, dialing another number. Muten Roshi: Yo Tsurusen‟nin! I‟ve got your picture! Tsurusen‟nin: Let me see it! Muten Roshi: It‟s coming through on the fax machine. Tsurusen‟nin: Uh huh…hm? Oooh! Oh yeah! This is a GREAT picture! Thanks Roshi! *hangs up* Buruma: All right, now I‟m going to fax MY picture… Muten Roshi: *dancing around happily* This is great! I‟ve got a picture of the FBP plus two other cute ladies! Me: Stop including me in your sick ramblingsKuririn: And 18 likes me-
Muten Roshi: *pays no attention* Bwahahaha! I‟m so cool! People will love me! Just think of the publicity I could get! Vegeta: Someone‟s pretty worried about what others think of them, aren‟t they? Muten Roshi: Oh, shut up. You guys look more like victims of fashion then I do! The Z crew looks at their beaten-up selves. Kuririn: You know, he really does have a point… *To be continued…* Dedicated to Mabelle 7983, Solar Shadow and Red Ribbon no Pink Technician –the biggest #17 nuts I know!