We Aussies have a way of promoting our
own identity quietly and with little fanfare,
whether it be in terms of business, sport or
leisure. The droopy mo of cricket; the tight,
butt hugging shorts of footy, and even the
budgy smugglers of our politicians. And
who can forget those Oz swimmers in their
revolutionary full body Ozzy cozys, the
netballers in their flamboyant skirts and the
irrepressible camel toe of those true blue
weight loss commercials? Each a genuine
reflection of the Aussie spirit and all
f late, i can’t help but notice if they actually have their car keys, better and all.
that our pride of identity by yet which pocket they put them in, and Lets say “NO” to advertising on
ensemble is coming under threat along come the Poms with an exciting platform thongs. NO, to snarling faces on
from abroad, and nowhere is this more innovation to confuse them even more! the back of our hats. NO, to uncountable
noticeable than in our own, legendary and from the other side we have sponsor logos surreptitiously placed all
sport of fishing. those yanks themselves? They, too, over those uncomfortable synthetically
From one side we face the Brits, with are also having a solid go to make blended bloody pullover shirts they keep
their tweed getups and hip boots. Smug inroads into the traditional Oz fishing handing out to us at those so called
little buggers who go fishing in gear cozzy. Those cappuccino crazy, bourbon ‘state wide’ fishing comps which the
more appropriate for an average scene swilling tank drivers have an uncanny locals indubitably take by storm anyway.
in Four weddings and a Funeral than for knack for being able to put advertising Let us here and now define true blue
taking on our own wily tuna and sambos. on any and everything they can get their OZ fishing clobber once and for all, and
Picture a nice smear of mackerel slime hands on. They’ve done it to surf swim pledge to keep it aussie and the real deal.
across the front zip of those tweed smugglers, the footy jumper and just Starting from the ground up, we need
strides and see how you go, hah! and about everything that’s cricket. They have to declare the traditional rubber thong
how about those multi-pocketed, many turned the French tour de force into a as the official and perennial footwear.
faceted, funky little trout vests the Poms rolling billboard and the v8 Supercars This is to be kept and worn until the
wear when standing crotch deep in their into lightening speed subliminal adverts. double gees of red Bluff finally pop thru
river sewage? These carp vests are even where will it all take us, i ask you? and become just too painful to carry on.
making great inroads into the yankee Hopefully not beyond the threshold of maybe, just maybe, venture into runners
surplus stores, and those red white our great Oz sport of fishing. Ladies and for a bit of rock hopping at Quobba, but
and blue nosed american seniors can’t gentlemen, fishers every one of you, we never stray far from the thong…… and
seem to get enough of them. Shame, have got to unite so as to protect and never, never call it a ‘flip flop’.
shame. an entire sector of the uS baby defend our right to traditional, functional Now move up to the Footy shorts….
boomin’ public barely able to remember and comfortable fishin’ clobber for one tight makes right. Torn is reborn and
LIFE AccORDING TO ISHMAEL
a salty crotch is the look to go for. No good ole footy jumper if you really want as chips.
tweed near my seed, i tell ya. it’s cotton to look the pro. what a great way to show and then the hat. i’m all for a good
till it’s rotten for me. my rod pouch is my off your scar tissue from that weld splash ole’ woollen beanie myself. Could never
cup. and what about those ridiculous along with those infected Bangkok tats. get the hang of those floppy little
waterproof, quick drying, attachable/ Now we’re talking the look of big game brimmed things. more for cutting the
detachable zipper bottomed pants? Keep fishin aussie style. Let’s see just how lawn, i reckon. if they were all that good
your knees in the breeze summer and much myth and legend you can get onto they would float. and whatever your
winter, i say, for a warm day is never far one arm. who needs sun gloves when headdress, the less advertising the better,
away in w.a. you got plenty of indo ink? if you ask me.
when it comes to top dressing this Cover up with a bit of light woollen Sunscreen to the upper and lower
is where you show your true aussie checkers in the cool of dawn if you must, extremities? Bah, Humbug! The redder
colours. The challenge here is to find and never with a patch or thatch. even a the better, i say. Go au natural, and keep
a comfortable fitting shirt with little or hoody will do. Get those frayed sleeves that aussie salute going, too.
no three syllable advert. you may even and bare elbows out there, guys! and There you go! Practical, affordable
have to go to Good Sammys for an older, replacing lost buttons is for muttons. and, what is most important, we will all
broken in model, or pick off the patches a cheap spray jacket and you are on come across in true blue aussie style.
on something more contemporary from your way. So spool up the Shimano with plenty of
india, and hang it out on the ‘Hills’ for a Sunnies? wrap arounds are the way that new Jinkai, check the yamaha for
few weeks to fade the colours right out to go so as to foster that real racoon-like fuel, fire up the Toyota and lets’ get out
of it. maybe even splash a bit of paint look after a tough day at Steep Point. The amongst the big ones in True Blue Oz
here and there, dirty engine oil, road tar, cheaper the better. you are just going to fashion.
and bait smear. leave them on the bar anyway. and for Now, just where did i leave that old
if you are real lucky you might just the older blokes, those flip up, clip-ons alvey of mine?
score a genuine aussie singlet, an are still the go. Plentiful at the highway Over and out…
acceptable, threadbare Bali tee, or a roadhouses along the way, and cheap ishmael