AMANDA

AMANDA STORY Amanda Skinner sat miserably in her bedroom struggling with the algebra she‟d been set. Like many others maths was not her best subject. Mr Symes the teacher was difficult to approach. His attitude, you‟re at grammar school, you should understand, didn‟t help. She puzzled unhappily with the problems before her. Mind boggling equations, deriving graphs from them switching sides, changing signs. It was a confusing mass of numbers and letters. The more she tried fathoming it, the worse it became. In despair she threw her books across the room. In the schools upper sixth and very pretty she had ebony hair descending half way down her back. She lived in Kent with her mother. Aged eighteen, her beauty and personality won her many friends. Attracting boys in her year, she‟d gone out with several of them. One called Phillip offered to help her with Maths. Unfortunately he was no better than her. He wanted her alone and not for Maths tuition. So this was the swinging 60‟s. That didn‟t give him rights. Read the papers and teenagers were on drugs. Everyone slept around! An age of degenerates. She shuddered involuntarily. It was utter rubbish. The boys at school were geeks or full of themselves. Clubbing was little better. Boys her age were jerks. Her eyes wandered round her room. Posters of pop singers still adorned the walls. One of the Beatles took pride of place. She smiled to herself. There was someone she liked, Mr James her English teacher. Good-looking, friendly, that wasn‟t all, he possessed the sophistication her peers totally lacked. She relapsed into fantasy. In his late twenties Frank James was one of the younger masters. She saw him calling at her house. He‟d sort out her homework then sweep her off her feet. Over a candlelit dinner he‟d gaze into her eyes…… She returned to reality. When she was twelve her parents separated and her father moved away. She missed him terribly at the time. Now her memory of him was confused. Relations with her mother were strained. Her mum‟s alcohol addiction and a succession of men friends. After some disagreeable encounters she tried to avoid them. Returning to the Maths, an idea struck her. She‟d ask her English Master. He‟d surely help. Maths wasn‟t until the afternoon. She‟d contact him during morning break. Feeling happier she put on a record and let the music lull her to oblivion. Finding it difficult to stay awake, she undressed completely, had a soak in the bath and slipped still naked between the sheets. Completely relaxed she was very conscious of her body. Feeling physical desire she imagined Mr James. If he‟d been there now. The front door banged and she heard her mother on the stairs. She was earlier than usual. Was anyone with her? The bedroom door opened. “I‟m alone” she slurred as her daughter started in alarm. Amanda relaxed. She was accustomed to her mother‟s drunkenness. “You‟ve enjoyed yourself?” she ventured uncertainly. “Yes my dear,” drawled her Mum. “I‟ll see you later.” Wobbling on her feet she withdrew noisily. Drifting between fantasy and reality Amanda was soon fast asleep. Awaking with a start much later she realised she‟d overslept. It was 8.30am and the bus to school was due in 20 minutes. Her mother was still sleeping off last night. Hurriedly washing and dressing she‟d barely time to snatch a sandwich before sprinting down the road. She was the last to board the bus. “What happened to you?” asked Sandra curiously as she joined her friend, a pig tailed girl with glasses. Sandra was her age. “Don‟t ask,” she panted. “How was the Maths?" “It sucked” replied her friend. “My old man helped me.” Lucky you Amanda thought bitterly. “And you?” rejoined Sandra. “So-so” Amanda lied. Her anxiety increased. Her heart was thumping when she entered the school grounds. Leaving Sandra she made for the staff room. Outside the door her courage failed her. “I can‟t do this” she gasped to herself. If you‟re not sure ask she‟d always been told. That didn‟t apply here. You were supposed to know. It was her problem. No one could help. Screwing up her courage she knocked. There was an agonising pause. It seemed an age before the door opened. To her relief, it was the English Master. “Amanda” he exclaimed taken aback. “Who do you wish to see?” “Y-You” she gasped in a strangled voice. “Can‟t it wait till the lesson?” “No it can‟t” she squirmed at his curious stare. “Then you better come in.” An awkward thought struck her. Mr Symes could be there. It was an impossible situation. 1 “Can I see you alone?” she averted her eyes. His eyebrows rose. For one dreadful moment she thought he‟d question her. Luckily his face relaxed. “Come on then” he gave her a grin. Following him upstairs, her feelings were in turmoil. Fear and apprehension dulled the thrill of being with him. Entering his room he closed the door behind them. “Now Amanda. How can I help?” “My homework‟s due today. It‟s lost me.” “Let‟s have a look.” Opening her bag she extracted her books. “This is Maths. Where‟s your English?” He answered abruptly. “English is fine. It‟s Maths I go to pieces on.” “Then you must see John Symes.” “B-but I can‟t.” About to reply, he saw tears in her eyes. “Why?” he asked gently. Fraught with emotion she described her personality clash with the Maths master and difficulties at home. After listening he pursed his face. “This isn‟t good” he said gravely. “I‟ll speak to the head.” He saw her anguished face. “It‟s not your fault. John shouldn‟t have let it come to this. Let‟s look at that Maths” he added with a smile. She studied his face while he pored over the problems. At last he fetched some paper and wrote down some figures. “Luckily I remember these” he indicated the equations. With painstaking care he explained what he‟d done. She wanted to understand but some of it was still unclear. With her heart in her mouth she asked him to go over it. Straight away he did so and to her delight she found she understood. “Sir you‟re sweet.” Wrapping her arms round his neck, she gave him a rapturous kiss. “Amanda” he gently disengaged himself. “Someone might have come in.” “Mr Symes says you should understand if you‟re at grammar school.” “Hmm” he exclaimed. “Are you ok now?” “Yes” she smiled happily. When he left the room she finished the Maths. What was hours of agonising had taken only minutes. It heightened her crush for him. Not just good looking he was the best teacher in the school. After finishing the maths she made for the 6th form room. Later in English she gazed intently at the master. Was he avoiding her eye? She considered making an error just to get his attention. At midday break she walked into town. She was sifting through the latest releases when a nearby voice broke her thoughts. “You‟re Amanda?” It belonged to a youth with heavy features and athletic appearance. He was in her year. “So?” she continued her perusal. “Who‟s your favourite?” he asked. “Does it matter?” she replied without looking up. “I‟m Michael” he continued. Forcing a smile she faced him. He looked awkward before blurting out. “I‟ve noticed you for ages. I – I really like you.” Totally indifferent she merely wished he‟d go away. Instead he asked. “Could I take you to the school dance?” About to refuse she recalled her English Master. “I guess some teachers‟ll be there?” “Frank and John are supervisors.” “I‟ll come!” she agreed. His face lit up and he squeezed her hand. “I‟ll hire a taxi to pick you up.” Smiling mechanically her mind was elsewhere. Frank would see her dolled up. She admired him even more when she got full marks for maths. “Are you going to the dance Saturday?” She asked Sandra on the bus. “Yeh are you?” “Michael‟s taking me.” “ What Michael Thompson?” “Yeh!” “All the girls fancy him” Sandra exclaimed jealously. “So why didn‟t you go with him?” “He didn‟t ask. Besides Geoff‟s taking me.” “What are you wearing Sands?” “I‟m going shopping” she replied. “And you?” “Something eye catching” Amanda smiled mischievously. “Michael will like you.” Sandra teased. Amanda didn‟t mention who‟d really caught her eye. 2 Chapter 2 At home a silence greeted her. Her smile disappeared. What could she wear? She hadn‟t the money to buy clothes. Her eye rested on a letter addressed to her. To her amazement it was from her Dad. The letter said he missed her. He‟d never had a quarrel with her. His circumstances had improved. Enclosed was a cheque for £50.00, also his address in Great Yarmouth and phone number. She suppressed a shout of delight, her mother mustn‟t know! Apart from hearing from Dad, the money was heaven sent. “Mum are you there?” she rushed upstairs elated. “In here Mandy” called a weary voice. She entered her mother‟s room to see her lying on the bed. “You‟ve a letter downstairs” she murmured. “Michael‟s written asking me out” she lied. This drew no reply. “Mum I‟m going to the school disco tomorrow night.” Her mother sighed. “You know I need you to look after the house.” This meant cleaning and cooking for when she returned. “It‟s only the school disco. It‟ll finish in good time.” “I want you here” she answered firmly. “That‟s tough. I‟m going.” “I can‟t be worrying where you are.” “You get plastered but I can‟t have fun? That‟s my Mum. Well shove it!” she yelled. “Watch your lip or you‟ll feel the riding crop my girl.” “You used to bully me but I‟m bigger now. Touch me and I‟ll crop you” she drew herself to her full height. “Maybe I can‟t but someone still can. Griffin‟ll teach you respect.” Despite her fury Amanda recoiled nervously. This was no idle threat. He was mum‟s main boyfriend. Of them all he was the worst. She loathed and feared him! Just his name scared her. “I‟m sorry mum” she gasped. “I‟m going and that‟s final.” Feeling a lump in her throat, she stifled her tears. What had happened to her mother? Why was she like this? Storming from the room she sought refuge in her bedroom. Locking herself in she laid on the bed. Over an hour elapsed. Her sheet was soaked with angry tears. Even Dad‟s letter couldn‟t console her. Later she undressed to shower and freshen up. Entering the bathroom she‟d stepped under the jet when she started nervously hearing her mother by the door. “Can I come in?” she called. “If you must” her daughter answered nervously. She felt vulnerable with nothing on. Was this normal she wondered. Surely she could trust her mum? “Would you like me to wash your back?” She‟d done this before. But now things were different. Her mother made her nervous. “Ok” she agreed uneasily. The older woman soaped the sponge then rubbed it soothingly over her shoulders, down her spine. Her mum was good, very good. Despite everything Amanda relaxed. “I‟m sorry about earlier Mandy. I‟d never let anyone touch you.” “Forget it mum.” She spoke forgiveness she was far from feeling. Her mother soaped her neck before returning to her shoulders. “So you think you‟ll be back by ten?” “I don‟t know Mum” she replied annoyed the subject had risen again. “Ten o‟clock‟s late enough” her Mum observed stubbornly. “I‟ll come back when I‟m ready” she snapped. “You‟ll be back at ten or else.” “Or else what?” she rounded on her. “You gonna to tell Griffin?” “Just tell me when” she resumed in a conciliatory tone. “I don‟t know! Midnight, maybe 1o‟clock.” “Be back by Ten thirty or I‟ll lock you out!” she threatened angrily. “I hate you!” her daughter yelled. “What am I going to do?” “Get back when I say” her mother persisted. Unhooking the shower she directed the water on her mothers face. She screeched with surprise and Amanda creased with laughter. That was her undoing. She felt her scalp burn as her mother seized her hair. Her vision jarred as she whacked her face. “Try that again and it‟ll be the crop not my hand. With welts across it you won‟t wanna go out.” 3 That night Amanda lay in bed in despair. Yet she knew one thing. She‟d go to that dance somehow, but then what? Would she be locked out? Worse would she see Griffin? She rose soon after dawn but her mother hadn‟t stirred. She felt relief but sad. That their relationship had sunk to this. She dreaded her own mother! At the first chance I‟m leaving. I‟ll live with Dad. She‟d never felt like that before. This house was no longer home. It was somewhere she existed. Each day she was on edge. Was her mother in a mood? Would she have to endure Griffin? After banking Dad‟s cheque she spent the morning shopping before buying something to eat. She was happier than she‟d been all day. She had the perfect outfit for tonight. Back home the atmosphere chilled. Her mother ignored her. Amanda locked herself in her room to change. At last she gazed in the mirror. Her sleeveless micro dress was enhanced by high heels. Her legs looked good if she thought so herself. They had to with this dress. Thigh revealing someone said. Was it over the top? How would mum react? Dismissing such thoughts she donned a small jacket. Why not exploit her charms? At eight Michael arrived. He wore leathers and helmet, his scooter was by the kerb. “Where‟s the taxi?” she asked annoyed. She‟d expected him to wear a suit. Removing his helmet he stared at her open mouthed. “Well” she snapped tersely. “You‟re sexy!” he breathed at last. This didn‟t answer her question. This isn‟t for you she thought. He still looked vacant. “The Taxi?” she repeated. “Here” he patted the scooter. “We‟ll be there in no time” he stared at her legs. “I can‟t sit on a pillion like this” she retorted. “Why not?” he suppressed a smile. This was taking the mickey! Springing forward she slapped his face. He clutched his cheek in dismay. “I thought even you could arrange a car.” He looked so remorseful her anger lessened. She had to be at that dance, even with him. She forced a smile. “I‟ll get a longer coat.” At last they were on their way. On arrival Michael submitted the tickets and slipped off his leathers. Underneath he had a suit, he almost looked handsome. Amanda held her tongue. In the school hall the band were setting up. Engrossed as they were, two of them watched her walk across the floor. So far so good. But would Frank appreciate her? Joining Sandra at a table her friend introduced her to Geoff. Amanda acknowledged her moustached companion. “Can I dance with you later?” he grinned at her fatuously. Amanda attracted much attention but she was blind to it. These boys were nothing to her. Her eyes scanned the hall. Where was her English Teacher? She noticed the Maths master. Making an excuse to her friends she approached him. “Hello Amanda” he greeted her cordially. His manner surprised her. Was this the same grouch who made her dread Maths? He certainly eyed her more than usual. “Have you seen Mr James?” she asked. “He‟s in the staff room.” An awful thought struck her. “Has he eh .. Have you brought your wives?” hardly believing she had the gall to ask. He gazed at her quizzically. “We‟re here to supervise” he sighed. As she turned away he asked. “Could I dance with you later?” “I guess so” she grinned. “But hopefully not” she whispered under her breath. Hurrying towards the staff room, she reached it as the English Master emerged. He stopped dead when their eyes met. “Hello” he smiled in honeyed tones. Her stomach fluttered as he gazed at her. “Y-you look lovely” he added. “Thank you Sir” she smiled shyly. Appearing to wrestle with himself his manner reverted. “Can I help you?” he asked. “You sound so formal” she replied trying to prolong this talk. He seemed unsure. “Must I still call you Sir?” she asked exploiting his silence. “All right” he replied. “You can call me Frank tonight. But in the classroom it‟s formal.” “Of course Sir, I mean Frank.” They both smiled at her mistake. “Frank” she faltered. “What?” he replied uncertainly. “Would you dance with me later?” Eying her curiously a faint smile crossed his face. She felt herself blush. “I‟m doing the stage lights then I‟ve reports to write. John and I are on our own.” She felt devastated. Every man would dance with her except the one she wanted. “The reports can wait. John‟ll take over the lights after ten o‟clock. If it‟s ok then…?” his eyes twinkled. Her heart thumped, she gave him a dazzling smile. “Not half Sir” she flaunted her hips. He gazed at her again. “I can‟t imagine anyone refusing you.” 4 “Maybe” she answered cryptically. “Amanda are you….” he tailed off. “Am I what Sir?” she felt it right to call him. “Nothing” he avoided her eye. “Sir” she studied his face. “Amanda!” “W-would you kiss me?” He stared at her aghast. “You know I can‟t” “Go on sir. We‟re on our own.” He hesitated noticeably. The corridor was empty, there was no one around. As he wavered a door closed nearby. His manner changed. “I must sort those lights” he exclaimed abruptly. “Is that a no?” She tried to hide her dismay. “What you ask is impossible.” “If this wasn‟t school and you weren‟t my teacher?” “But it is!” he retorted sharply. “I think you better go.” “You‟ll still dance with me later?” she asked desperately. “We‟ll see” he replied. Entering the staff room he closed the door behind him. Once inside he paused half afraid she‟d knock. To his relief she didn‟t. Still young and handsome, Miss Skinner wasn‟t the first girl to have a crush on him. But she was the oldest and much the prettiest. This without being dolled up. Tonight she was dressed to kill. “Why choose me?” he moaned. Despite his resolve he imagined her now. Sitting provocatively on his desk. Kissing her lips he stroked her naked thighs……! “Enough” he dispelled the idea. “It‟s what she can‟t have. If I pursued her she‟d run a mile.” After a while he opened the door gingerly. He scanned the corridor half afraid she‟d be there. Instead John Symes appeared. “Will you do me a favour?” he asked his colleague. John looked intrigued. “Go on.” “I‟ll do your shift with the lights.” “Consider it done” the Maths teacher grinned. He‟d be home earlier. Frank was doing him the favour! Or was he? He‟d heard Amanda with his colleague. Who was she gunning for? Certainly not him and apparently not Michael Thompson. Smiling he rubbed his hands. It made life interesting. “Will Miss Skinner still dance with me?” he chuckled. Chapter 3 After composing herself Amanda returned to their table. “Where have you been” Michael demanded crossly. Sandra and Geoff were dancing with the others. “I went outside” she answered avoiding his eye. “You need a drink” he snapped. There was a table serving soft drinks. “I‟ll have a coke.” “The lads are getting some beer in. There‟s wine if you prefer. In a concealed crate near the stage.” She‟d normally have refused but her emotions were raw. Angry and disappointed, would wine lessen the pain? Why couldn‟t she attract Mr James? “I‟ll have some wine” she said offhandedly. Mum imbibed why shouldn‟t she? Michael had hardly left the table when Mr Symes approached. Her heart sank. “Amanda” he called cheerily. “What about that dance?” She was trapped. Short of refusing there was no way out. Forcing a smile she followed her Maths tutor to the floor. “You‟re the most stunning girl here” he praised her. “Thank you” she answered politely. “Not everyone thinks so.” “Oh!” he exclaimed curiously. “You‟ve had a tiff?” He glanced at Michael returning with her wine. Poured in a glass it looked like coke. At least she hoped so. “It‟s not Mike” she replied without thinking. Why aren‟t I surprised the master thought. So who had caught her eye? “Whoever it is he‟s a fool to let you go.” Despite everything she appreciated the compliment. “He‟s blown it” she answered moodily. 5 “You‟ll soon find someone else. Reg‟s looking at you now.” “Reg?” “The Bandleader‟s been watching you.” She couldn‟t help smiling. He had the edge on the boys. “They asked me your name. I hope you don‟t mind?” the master added. “Have you seen Mr James?” The Master suppressed a grin. Was his colleague the mystery man? He enjoyed this cloak and dagger stuff. “He‟s behind stage.” Her first impulse was to find him. No one knocks me back she thought. She wouldn‟t have him now if he begged! Finishing the dance she rejoined Michael. “You didn‟t waste time” he retorted moodily. “You‟re jealous of him?” She glanced at Mr Symes derisively. Then Sandra and Geoff appeared. “Where‟ve you been?” Sandra asked. “Outside” she replied vaguely. “Did you enjoy your dance?” “Geoff‟s got two left feet.” She smiled at him. He grinned back but his eyes were on Amanda. During the intermission the band played several classics. She sipped her wine. Would she see Frank again? The dancing recommenced, this time with a Latin American theme. “Can we dance now?” Michael urged her. Nothing loathe she accompanied him on to the floor. “Old Symes seems taken with you” he observed spinning her round. “He wants another dance” she smiled mischievously. “The randy geezer” he bantered. “You told him where to go?” He grinned with self importance. She felt nothing for Symes but Michael irritated her. Instead of agreeing she said. “I will if he asks.” “Supposing I said you couldn‟t?” he smiled. “I‟d tell you to shove it.” “Just joking” he quipped. She looked at the clock. It was just after 9pm. She danced with Michael and Geoff. The latter didn‟t chat her up. He said nothing at all. His feelings for her left him tongue tied. The English master hadn‟t appeared and the evening was dragging. Michael gave her more wine. He and Geoff were on beers. Later she heard how they got them in. Michael knew both security guards. He had something on one of them. Although hired by the school a backhander sufficed. The dancing stopped, a game was being planned. “Ladies, Gentlemen, Boys and Girls” the bandleader announced. “Introducing Arnold and his Old Man.” Arnold was a ventriloquist. Old Man was a lifelike puppet. They did several sketches which were well received. “Now” he declared “Something for the young ladies.” There was an expectant silence. “I want the ladies to form a line in front. Whoever Old Man thinks is prettiest gets a prize. He indicated a few items on the table. “Talk about tacky” Michael muttered under his breath. “Go on you two” Geoff urged both girls. “I can‟t” Sandra protested modestly. “But Amanda‟s a cert” she smiled at her friend. “No” Amanda hissed. “Go on Mandy” Sandra pursued. “No” she protested. Jumping from her chair Sandra tickled her from behind. “I will if you do” she protested laughing. Still giggling both girls approached the front. Once someone made a move, others followed. Over thirty girls were in the line. „Old Man‟ supposedly studied each girl. If he nodded she was possible. A shake of his head and she was out. This took some time but five were short listed. Amanda was among them but not her friend. Glancing at her rivals Amanda sensed she‟d be picked. And she was to the amusement of Geoff and Sandra. “It was no contest” Michael declared examining the cheap perfume she‟d won. The dancing restarted. Michael was getting more drink. Geoff and Sandra were outside. It was 10.15pm, what was she doing here? She was the oldest girl. Would Michael create if she asked to be taken home? Tough if he did. She‟d get a cab otherwise. Mum would have to pay. Her heart missed a beat. Appearing from behind the stage the English Master headed to the back of the hall and sat in the corner. Was she glad her friends weren‟t there. He was alone! What was she to do? Any moment he could disappear. Blow this chance and she‟d never forgive herself. If he repulsed her she‟d know the score. Summoning her courage she headed across the hall. “Hello Amanda” his greeting was friendlier than she feared. So far so good, he almost smiled. “Hello Sir” she blushed. He smiled and looked away. 6 “Where‟s your friends?” he asked awkwardly. “Do you really want them here?” she felt his quizzical gaze. “I‟m sorry about earlier” she blurted out. “It‟s forgotten” he avoided her eye. Liar she thought. Almost fatalistically the band played a waltz. “Are you just going to sit there?” she asked. “Why?” he turned towards her. She bit her tongue. Was he deliberately being obtuse? “Will you dance with me?” She had to spit the words out. “I don‟t know” he hedged. “It‟s only a dance. What can happen in front of this lot?” Eying the others she noticed Sandra and Geoff in their seats. “You‟re a beautiful girl” he stared in her eyes. “I‟m flattered you like me but it can‟t go anywhere.” “So you like me a bit?” she asked hoarsely. She was in turmoil. Why was she saying this? If this wasn‟t role reversal! Men chatted her up. She never made the running. With anyone else she‟d have walked off. But it wasn’t someone else. “The Waltz‟ll be over” she hinted. With a weary sigh he jumped to his feet. Don‟t strain yourself she thought. Hurt and angry she forced a smile. Taking her hand he led her to the floor. He danced well, very well. Her annoyance evaporated, her desire heightened, what could she say to him? “You‟re very good” she ventured. “So are you” he smiled. After pausing he asked. “Is Michael your boyfriend?” His question riled her. “He‟s not my boyfriend” she snapped. “I only came to see you.” “We‟ve discussed this already” he reminded her gently. With impeccable timing the music finished. “Don‟t worry I‟ll leave you alone.” Turning away she felt like crying. “I never want to see him again she thought.” Michael returned and she hurriedly joined him. “You‟re popular tonight” he bantered. “ Will you take me home?” she gasped. “You what?” “I feel rough.” “Thanks for nothing” he snarled. You bastard she thought too depressed to argue. She had to get out of here. “I‟m going to a club. Get the others to take you.” “You selfish pig” she yelled. “If the cap fits” he growled. “You used me.” In a huff he stormed off. Unfortunately Sandra and Geoff had left. Not surprising, it was after 11pm. People were going home. She‟d ring for a cab. Unfortunately the only phone was in the staff room. Frank James opportunely appeared. She didn‟t want to see him but there was no choice. “I‟ll drive you home” he said when she asked. “Don‟t bother yourself” she snapped spitefully. Angry and depressed the words slipped out. She wanted to apologise but the master walked away. Fortuitously Mr Symes appeared and readily agreed to drive her back. The journey was uneventful save her pounding heart. What was awaiting her at home? It was midnight when he stopped at her gate. Had her mother locked her out? “W-would you wait until I go in?” she asked the master nervously. “I‟ll come to the door” he answered firmly. His manner was tense. Did he suspect something? The door was opened by her mother. “Hello sweetheart” she smiled and hugged her. What was this? The school master left and she entered the hall. The door was barely shut when the gloves were off. “Where‟ve you been?” yelled her parent.” “You know damn well!” Amanda shouted. “What time did I tell you?” “I‟m not a child. You can‟t tell me what to do!” “But I can” growled a menacing voice. Amanda screamed as Griffin loomed brandishing the crop. She tried to bolt to her room but he blocked her path. “Not so fast” he snarled. “You‟re gonna learn respect.” “Not too hard” her mother pleaded nervously. “L-let me go.” Escaping from his grasp she raced upstairs. But he was quicker. On the landing he tripped her. Fortunately she was unhurt, the crop hit her coat. Being thick it absorbed the blow. Then he hit her bare legs. That hurt unbearably. She screamed with anguish so he hit them again! 7 “That‟ll do” her mother remonstrated. Howling in pain she thought her legs were bad. The next blow struck her face. It seemed heavier than the crop. Her vision swam, the sound distorted, her head was splitting when they placed her on her bed. She shut her eyes and knew no more. Chapter 4 When she opened her eyes her head was pounding. But she kept silent. She daren’t attract Psycho (her nickname for Griffin). What he‟d do, heaven knows. She‟d rowed with her mother but nothing like this. She had to get away, perhaps flee to her Dad. That precious letter gave his address. He and Mum were always at odds. Once they even came to blows. She remembered Mum being cold and distant while her Dad was warm and loving. Unluckily when deciding custody they deemed her mother the injured party. Dad hadn‟t helped his case by striking her. Portrayed as violent, her mother showed the court her bruises. They banned him from seeing her and Amanda. This transpired later. He was wicked her mother said yet she hit him and he never raised a hand. For the rest of the night and Sunday she didn‟t venture from her room. All was quiet but this couldn‟t go on. Luckily her room in front enabled her to see the road. As the evening advanced her mother and Psycho went out. It was her chance for something to eat. Sneaking downstairs she prepared a quick meal. Then another thought crossed her mind. Listening for any unexpected return she found some loose change. Opening the front door she hurried to the nearest coinbox. Would her Dad be there? She trembled violently dialling the number. If Griffin appeared now!! “Please pick up” she prayed as it rang at the other end. “Hello.” Hearing a woman‟s voice her heart sank. “I-is eh Mr Skinner there?” she gasped. “Hang on”. There was an agonising pause but she heard background conversation. “Arthur!” she heard the woman shout. “Who is it?” “How the hell should I know.” Amanda wished she‟d given her name. “Its a young woman.” There was total silence. Amanda feared she‟d been cut off. “Hello.” Six years had passed but she immediately recognised his voice. “D-Dad” she gasped. Tears rushed to her eyes, she could hardly speak. “Amanda!” he sounded amazed. “I can‟t take any more” she sobbed. “What‟s happened?” he demanded anxiously. She tearfully related their cruelty and how Griffin struck her. “He should be horsewhipped. I‟ll come for you now.” That was too dangerous. Her mother and Psycho would be back. “They‟ll stop me leaving the house.” That was no exaggeration. Her mother would lock her in her room. Griffin threatened to tie her up. Her father thought a moment. He could hardly call with all guns blazing. With that court order he’d be the one arrested. “When does school finish?” he asked. “Four o‟clock” “I‟ll be outside there tomorrow. Don‟t worry anymore” he added reassuringly. She shouted with joy after hanging up but by Monday morning she was in a cold sweat. Supposing Mum found out? Or even worse Griffin? Fortunately her fears seemed unfounded. Griffin wasn‟t there and her mother seemed indifferent at breakfast. The bus journey and the lessons of the day seemed a whirl. Everyone noticed the swelling on her face but Sandra questioned her. She knew she didn‟t believe she‟d fallen downstairs. I‟ll tell you one day she thought. Her Dad was rescuing her and she was happy. As it happened English was the last subject of the day. As she was leaving Mr James called her back. The school dance was forgiven, she couldn‟t stay angry with him! “What‟s this Amanda?” he looked critically at her face. He looked so kind a lump came to her throat. “ I fell down stairs” she repeated for the umpteenth time. The master shook his head. “John and I are concerned, and not just us.” “Why?” she asked nervously. “Did he hit you?” 8 “He?” she feigned ignorance. “He was here several weeks ago with your mother.” Amanda faltered recalling Griffin‟s words. What he‟d do if she squealed. “No” she replied fearfully. He eyed her searchingly. She knew he‟d guessed the truth. “If my brother was here he‟d sort him out.” “Your brother Sir?” “My family run a poultry farm in Norfolk. When I wanted to teach they accused me of deserting the fold.” “Is your brother like you?” she asked. The master laughed. “Sean‟s twice my size. He says I have the brains he‟s got the brawn. For a while he was a nightclub bouncer. He beat one lout to pulp who hurt a girl there. She backed Sean at the police hearing and he got off with a warning, but the club had to let him go.” Amanda looked at the clock. It had just turned four o‟clock. With a squeal of joy she rushed out to the road. She stopped dead. There was no one there! She gulped with disappointment but kept a keen watch on the traffic. Great Yarmouth was a long way, he could have been held up. An hour passed but still she studied every car. She almost mistook a pedestrian for her desperately awaited parent. “Oh Dad, Dad” she whispered. Her eyes filled with tears. “Where are you?” “Amanda you‟re still here?” Mr James reappeared unexpectedly. “Yes Sir” she answered miserably. “It‟s nearly Six O‟clock. Are you waiting for someone?” “Yes” she admitted reluctantly. “Do you mind my asking who?” He adopted that kindly tone she knew so well. She wanted to tell him but it could backfire. With the court order he could ruin everything. She dared not take the chance. “Just someone” she answered vaguely. “I‟ll be back in half an hour. If they haven‟t showed I urge you to let me drive you home.” When the master disappeared she was in an agony of apprehension. She half wanted to abandon this vigil, the other half urged she stayed. When the master returned he eyed her quizzically. “I can‟t make you come with me but I really feel you should.” Sick at heart she got in the car beside him. Even now the irony wasn‟t lost on her. She‟d longed to be in his car with him. But not like this! Her Mother was surprised to see the English Master. “My apologies” he began. “Miss Skinner needed extra tuition on her grammar.” “Where the f…… s she been?” rasped a cruel voice. “I‟ll teach her once and for all!” Amanda gasped involuntarily. Griffin strode into the hall about to unleash further abuse when he saw the English Master. “We were worried” her Mother explained hurriedly. “Are you all right Amanda?” The master glanced uneasily at the ruffian. Her throat tightened, she desperately wanted to say she wasn‟t. Her eye caught Griffin‟s and she shrank in terror. “You don‟t have to stay” the teacher said determinedly. “You can come with me.” “I‟m ok” she gasped fearfully. With considerable reluctance the master took his leave. “So what‟s with yer English?” she challenged her daughter when the teacher disappeared. “Just grammar I had to correct.” “If you studied properly instead of going out this wouldn‟t happen” she snorted. “You‟re soft Julie” snarled the ruffian. “I‟ll teach her a lesson she‟ll never forget.” “Go upstairs” her mother told her. “I‟ll bring you something to eat.” Anxiously waiting till Psycho disappeared she hurried upstairs. Even now she wasn‟t safe. He pounced from behind as she passed the spare room. “Squeal and I‟ll break yer arm” he whispered savagely. His hand clamped across her mouth. Far stronger than her she struggled helplessly in his grip. She felt unbearable pain across her shoulder. “Stop struggling” he snarled. Almost choking she complied. “Have you been blabbing?” he growled. The agony in her shoulder increased. Somehow she shook her head. “You‟re a pretty bitch. I‟ll ease up if you leave yer door open tonight.” She‟d thought it couldn‟t get worse but it had. “Tell yer mum and I‟ll kill yer!” Forcing her arm higher her eyes were popping with the pain. It was heaven when he released her. He glared fiercely. “It‟s our arrangement. Cross me and ………” he left the rest unsaid. Leaving her reeling by her room he went downstairs. She initially feared her arm was broken but mercifully the pain eased. Her Mum brought her a boiled egg with bread and a cup of milk for supper then retreated without a word. Despising her mother, to 9 him she was a saint. Her mind was in turmoil. Her Dad had forsaken her. Would he appear tomorrow? It seemed unlikely. Telephoning was impossible. She‟d try again tomorrow at school. Now she was in a dilemma. With trembling fingers she locked her bedroom door. She dreaded crossing him but the alternative was far worse. The morning couldn‟t come too soon. Would her prayers be answered? Would she contact her dad? When the school bus arrived she dashed feverishly to the staff room door. Had the English Master seen her arrive? He answered the door and permitted her to use the phone. Her heart pounded painfully when she dialled her father‟s number. It rang and rang. “There‟s no answer” she exclaimed bitterly. “It‟s your father isn‟t it? he said. She stared in dismay. “Please don‟t say anything” she begged him. “Don‟t worry” he reassured her. She somehow got through the lesson but her attempt at break was no more successful. Two further tries bought no joy but she still spent an hour that evening at the school gate. Alas there was no sign of her father. The English Master took her home once more. To her relief the house was empty. Accompanying her inside he noticed a small framed picture of Griffin on the shelf. “Isn‟t that him?” he asked. When she confirmed it he picked it up. “If he touches you again tell me” he urged. “Y-yes Sir” she stammered nervously. When the master departed the picture was missing. Discarding her uniform she donned a white blouse and jeans and made herself some tea and toast. She was absorbed watching TV when a fearful crash shattered her peace. Her mother burst into the room brandishing the riding crop. “You treacherous harlet!” she bawled hysterically. “What‟s wrong?” Amanda asked alarmed. “You know what!” she stormed. “You‟ve spoken to him” (meaning her Dad). “Mum” she began in a quavering voice. “Please leave me alone.” “I‟ll thrash you!” she screamed. Luckily she was drunk. Amanda avoided the swipe at her face. “Where is she?” roared a savage voice. Her alarm changed to terror hearing Griffin close by. Rushing past her mother through the open front door, she evaded his clutches. “Come here!” he thundered pursuing her. It was now or never, she had to flee. Running like mad, fear spurred her on. Down one street then another her breath came faster. She had to keep going. It was getting dark. Evasion would be easier. Even now she could hear him. She couldn‟t maintain this pace. A public park loomed. On one side was a children‟s playground. In this was a Wendy house. Her pursuer wasn‟t in sight but he was still on her trail. With her heart in her mouth she hid behind the house. If he appeared she‟d let him pass then retrace the way she‟d come. No sooner thought, he entered the park. Not seeing her he paused but only for a moment. He walked towards her. In panic she almost broke cover. Was her guardian spirit watching? He wouldn‟t realise she was there. He was cursing fiercely. As he approached she discerned his words. “I‟ll get you my pretty. You won‟t get away.” He stopped ominously by the playground. Her heart pounded madly. He knew she was there! Again she almost fled. Then he spoke out. “If you can hear me take heed. I‟ve dealt with your father. You won‟t see him now.” There was an agonising pause. From her hiding place she saw him. He was casting about. “He thought he was tough but I showed him” he brandished his fists. Was he calling her bluff? She prayed he was. Fresh feelings engulfed her. This scum had hurt her Dad. Burning for revenge, her anger matched her terror. How dare he touch him! “Here Pretty Pretty” he snarled. I‟m not his cat she thought. Her anger vanished when he entered the playground. She stared paralysed with fear. If he discovered her she was finished. Praying she watched helplessly. Thank God he walked away. As he receded she drew breath. She didn‟t venture forth till he‟d left the park. Her heart still thumped, that was too close for comfort. Running the opposite way she scaled the railings on the far side. She‟d eluded her enemy. She was truly on her own. Chapter 5 For a while she just ran street after street but as she became surer she was no longer being tailed, her courage returned. With that came clear thinking. She needed some sort of plan. First she had to contact her father. Fortunately she had his letter. She also had some loose change. Finding a phone box she dialled the number. Her heart pounded, she prayed he would answer. 10 “Hello.” It was the woman she‟d spoken to before. Explaining who she was she asked for her Dad. “He‟s in hospital.” She couldn‟t believe her ears! “What happened?” she asked numbly. “That monster with your mother. Arthur confronted him. Your dad had guts but he didn‟t stand a chance. The police intervened but his attacker shot through. Luckily it‟s not too serious. He should be home tomorrow.” “Thank goodness” she sighed with relief. “Get away Amanda. He‟s nasty. Flee while you can. I can‟t drive or I‟d fetch you myself.” “Which hospital‟s Dad in?” “They transferred him up here.” As she listened her eyes watered. But there was more to come. “ Get here as soon as possible. He‟ll take you with him to France.” “But surely ………” The woman cut her dead! “Griffins spies are everywhere. He‟s dangerous. It‟s your father he wants but he‟ll hurt you to get at him. He doesn‟t know this address but it‟s only a matter of time. When you leave I shan‟t hang around.” Amanda was dumbstruck. He was villainous she knew. But this was worse. The conviction gripped her. This was her fault. He‟d done this for her! “That I could finish you myself” she thought of Griffin. There was no other choice. She had to get to Great Yarmouth. Chapter 6 The front door banging roused Mrs Skinner from her sleep. Griffin strode in the room. “I almost had her!” he roared. “If the car was parked outside instead of up the bleedin road.” “You frighten her” she remonstrated opening a bottle of Gin. “Frighten her!” he bellowed. “That‟s nothing. When I catch her, she‟ll know what fear is.” “Be careful” the mother spoke nervously. She disliked her daughter but this man scared her. “How come” he growled. “Your Arthur‟s pathetic. The Old Bill stopped me finishing him.” “Shame” she mumbled trying to sound disappointed. For the first time she was grateful to the police. Despite his faults Arthur never harmed Amanda. The family black sheep, to Griffin he was a shining knight. Alas she learned too late. After scaring off her friends Griffin was firmly in control. “What did you do to him?” She tried to sound unconcerned. “He tried to play the father figure.” The ruffian gave a coarse laugh. “Squared up to me he did. I don‟t take that from anyone. I knocked him about a bit.” “Knocked him around?” she echoed. The ruffian glared derisively. “That‟s what I said. He made me mad.” If the Old Bill hadn‟t showed he wouldn‟t just be in hospital.” The mother bit her tongue. Befriending this man was a terrible mistake. Now she was trapped. Who‟d be next on his list. Amanda thankfully had escaped. Would he vent his wrath on her? “Little pretty won‟t escape.” “We don‟t know where she is” she observed. He glared fiercely. “You think I‟m stupid? I know where she‟s going. I‟ve contacts there. Paddy and his gang‟ll help. They owe me big time.” All the time she‟d been swigging the bottle. Now her vision swam, her head felt light. “That‟s right drink you useless hag” he bellowed. “It‟s all you‟re good for.” It was the last thing she remembered before slipping into oblivion. Chapter 7 With many a frightened backward glance Amanda walked steadily. The houses became scarcer. Before her stretched a country road. She needed luck and all her wits. This way was harder but main roads were too dangerous. If Griffin followed by car! The thought churned her stomach. She had to keep going! As she walked the clouds revealed the Moon. She looked at it full on. It seemed to smile. By it‟s light she saw the narrow road. Fortunately it wasn‟t cold. There was no where she could sleep but she was too hyped up to rest. At the first town she came to she‟d find a bank and get some money. She still had plenty of her Dad‟s. Without ID it would take longer. But she needed ready cash. First thing tomorrow she‟d travel to Yarmouth by train. With her future planned she thought of school. She‟d be leaving soon anyway. What about her A 11 levels? Was her coursework all for nothing? It couldn‟t be helped, her friends weren‟t homeless. Sandra had a loving father and he was there. She thought of Mr James. He would guess what happened. Maybe Psycho would be put away. She‟d been walking for four hours and her feet were aching. The sky was clearing, the Moon shone down. In that dark country road the stars appeared as never before. What was she doing here? A hopeless longing gripped her. She felt so alone. If only her English Master were here! So he rebuked her when she erred. When it mattered he was there. Her eyes filled with tears. She was so unhappy. Breaking down completely she cried as she hadn‟t done since childhood. She was tired and cold. The prospect of walking all night was more daunting. Could she find somewhere sheltered? A few hours rest would be heaven. A barn would suffice but none were around. The silence was interrupted by a noise. In the distance she saw approaching headlights. Her jaw dropped, she stared helplessly. Had Griffin somehow tracked her? Rooted to the spot she watched the vehicle approach. The engine‟s roar increased. His face rose before her. The worst of all nightmares. Would he drive her mad with terror? One thing was certain. In this lonely road he‟d kill her. Then nothing would matter. Surely it couldn‟t be. Had her life been for this? The car drew alongside. It was a young couple. Again she burst into tears; this time in sheer relief. “Where are you going?” The girl wound down the window. “G-Great Yarmouth” she replied hesitantly. Was this a trap? Would they return her to her enemy? She felt tired and hungry and they seemed nice. “It‟s your lucky night” the young man answered. “We‟re heading for Brentwood. It‟ll give you a start.” “B-but I‟ve no money to…..” “Get in” the girl interrupted. “I don‟t know how to thank you” she stammered gratefully. Scrambling in the back seat, she could scarcely believe her luck. It was manna from heaven after her walk. “You‟re going to Great Yarmouth” the girl pursued after a while. “Yes” Amanda admitted guardedly. “How?” “By train?” She summarised her story only omitting Griffins name. “That‟s awful” the girl exclaimed after a stunned silence. “You must go to the police.” “I want to start my life afresh” she replied. “You should still tell the Old Bill” the man observed. “If I did he‟d murder me” she answered in a quavering voice. “We only want to be your friends” the girl told her kindly. A lump came to her throat. She wanted friends badly. The girl asked her name. “Am.. she tailed off. “I‟m Anne” she rejoined. Why did they need to know her name? “I‟m Hannah. Michael‟s my other half” the girl smiled. She seemed so nice she regretted lying. It was too late now. They drove in silence for a while. Gradually it became more built up. “We‟re going through the Dartford Tunnel soon” Michael warned. Passing the pay point Amanda stared ahead. When they entered Essex she felt a surge of triumph. This stage of her journey was over. Now they drove a long time. She was just nodding off they drew into an all night café. “Come on Anne we‟re going to treat you to an English Breakfast.” In her half asleep state Amanda didn‟t respond. “Anne!” called the girl touching her shoulder. Starting up Amanda apologised. Why had she given a false name? It sounded so cold. “We‟re stopping for breakfast” Michael repeated. With everything that occurred Amanda had overlooked food. Now she realised she was ravenous. She also had no money. Watching them eat would be torture. “I‟ve no money so I‟ll w-wait here” she replied uncertainly. “Don‟t be silly we‟re treating you” the girl said. Amanda stared helplessly. “Y-you‟ve done so much for me already” she flushed with embarrassment. “Just give us a smile” Michael grinned. He gave her a kiss. “Watch it” Hannah warned playfully. The meal was nectar to Amanda‟s starving lips. Doubly welcome as it would be sometime before her next. Nearby she could hear a recent Beatle release. She thought of home. Precious moments without Psycho. Even at worst she could manage her mother. Once back on the road they soon reached Brentwood. 12 “We‟ll take you to Colchester. From there is a train to Norwich. “That‟s miles away” Hannah observed. “We were due at Mums two hours ago. She‟ll wonder where we are.” “Anne can‟t walk from here. We‟ll take her part of the way.” Amanda felt awkward. Had she outstayed her welcome? Hannah suddenly seemed less friendly. “You‟ve both been so kind. I can‟t thank you enough. Please drop me here.” “We‟ll take you to the A12. It‟s a main road. You‟re more likely to get a lift.” Michael said. Hannah stayed silent. “If you‟re sure” Amanda answered. Soon they joined the main road as Michael said. A moment later they entered a layby. “That‟s it I‟m afraid” he said apologetically. Without a word she got out. “Thank you again.” Instead of leaving he got out too. “We hope this‟ll help” he pressed something in her hand. She stared agog. He‟d given her Twenty Pounds!! “I c-can‟t accept this” she stammered going very red. Hannah remained in the car. She seemed displeased. “Don‟t argue” he said smiling. “We wish we could do more.” “I‟ll always remember this” she gasped overcome by their generosity. After kissing him she approached Hannah‟s door. She wound down the window. “God be with you Anne” she said kindly. Amanda kissed her gratefully. Moments later they drove away. As their car disappeared she felt sick with loneliness. She desperately wanted human companionship. For a despairing moment she considered going back. Even her Mother bettered this. Then she remembered Griffin. She had no home now, she had to press on. Thanks to these people she‟d evaded his clutches. At her Dad‟s she‟d start again. A life untarnished by fear. “To new beginnings” she said. She felt fit and could walk for ages. Thanks to that couple she could eat later. There was also sufficient for Bed and Breakfast. From a damaging low she was suddenly euphoric. She knew she could do it. Nothing could stop her now. She set off by the main road. This part was unlit so in the darkness she could walk unseen. This suited her. There were still creeps around. She had to take care. After little more than an hour a light lit the eastern sky. Soon the first Sun appeared. That was good in itself. The traffic had increased but no one headed her. She grew accustomed to its roar, Its noise was reassuring. But she wasn‟t invincible, the miles took their toll. She began to feel tired and there were no buses. The next town was still a long way. A convenient café appeared. It was four in the afternoon. She would enjoy some dinner and a welcome rest. Chapter 8 It was dusk before she finished. Have you ever been on autopilot? The last two hours seemed blank. Yet she‟d eaten and was no longer hungry. As she collected herself she was conscious of being watched. For a second she thought of Griffin, then she relaxed. Several tables away a frail white haired woman watched her. She was the only other person. Anxious to be going Amanda called the waitress. What was it about this woman? Yet she instilled fear? She thought of Griffin again. What was this aged crone to him? “Is there a Bed and Breakfast nearby?” she asked. Still she felt the woman‟s gaze. Getting a strange look she decided to ask elsewhere and left. She regretted not leaving sooner. A long night walk was a daunting prospect. Hitting the road she felt strangely light headed. She‟d had nothing stronger than coffee and certainly wasn‟t drunk. As she continued the traffic‟s roar dulled. Was the road curved or straight? It was hard to tell. “I wish it was better lit” she thought straining her eyes. The café was illuminated. Now she wished she‟d stayed there. She expected to see it behind. Inexplicably her route seemed as dark as that ahead. Perhaps it‟s behind a bend! Something certainly wasn‟t right. Where was all the traffic? The Moon appeared amidst the clouds. She could see at last. This wasn‟t the main road. It was so narrow a bike could scarcely pass. How could she go so wrong? What was happening? Where was she? Apart from rustling in the leaves there was total silence. This made no sense. Thoroughly unnerved she tried to retrace her steps. Now another problem arose. Her sense of direction swam, she couldn‟t keep to the road. “What‟s happening” she yelled. Her voice seemed strange. Instead of sustained it sounded dead. Like in a padded cell. She fell over repeatedly. Fortunately she wasn‟t hurt. Lost, disoriented she stumbled on blindly. A small garage appeared in front. Too dazed to care she never questioned why it was there. One of it‟s doors was ajar. That gap frightened her. Blacker than anything, what unspeakable horror lurked behind? She shuddered nervously. Whatever was inside should stay there she decided. Approaching the door, an 13 unreasoned terror gripped her. She felt sick inside. Summoning all her strength she struggled to shut it. What was moving her? Instead of pulling the door outside she was pushing it from within. As it closed she knew what she‟d done. She was trapped inside. In pitch blackness she tore wildly at the door. It stayed firmly shut. She was imprisoned with no way out. Somehow she had to think. As she collected herself a deep hiss cut the air. Indescribably menacing this was in there with her! Paralysed with fear she screamed and pulled out her hair. She felt a constriction on her chest, a relentless pressure. Demonic visions rushed her. They were enticing her to end it all. She was finished. In a paroxysm of terror she tore round beating her head. Again nothing made sense. She fell headlong. This would be it! The hissing grew louder, it was blended with another noise. As this continued she realised. It was only traffic!! Something pushed her shoulder. This was repeated several times. “Wake up.” Her vision cleared, she was in a lighted room. Had she died? Was this heaven? “Wake up” repeated the voice. She opened her eyes. Still in the café, she was lying on the floor. Two women loomed between her and the ceiling. “Are you ok?” they asked. As she came to she realised her position. “I‟m fine” she muttered unsteadily. “They think I‟m drunk” she thought. “You screamed” exclaimed one of them. “I‟m sorry” she said scrambling to her feet. “I must have nodded off. I‟ve been walking all day.” Her legs felt stiff, she was dog tired. “Is there a B& B around?” she asked. “Across the road” one of them pointed. Quickly settling her bill she followed the directions towards the B&B. Luckily they had space. After booking her room she undressed for bed. She was fast asleep as soon as her head hit the pillows. Chapter 9 A knock on the door aroused her. An elderly woman entered the room. Kindly unassuming, she eyed the young woman through wire rimmed spectacles. “Are you ready for breakfast?” she clucked handing her guest a cup of tea. Feeling much better, Amanda agreed she was. The woman watched and she twigged. She expected her to dress and go through. “I‟ll be five minutes” she told her. After her hostess withdrew, Amanda pulled on her clothes. She‟d soon need clean ones and a coat. Washing and dressing she took the liberty of borrowing a comb. It smoothed her tousled hair. This life‟s not for me she vowed. At least she‟d slept comfortably, thanks to Hannah and Michael. In the cold and dark she‟d really suffer. Entering the little dining room her meal was prepared. That was nice. She was afraid the woman would make conversation. Her fears were unfounded. Apart from serving breakfast she left her to herself. Until the end! “Good luck Amanda” she said. “I hope you find what you seek.” The young woman started. “Thanks.” she answered uneasily. Alarm bells were ringing. How did this lady know her name? She had to leave and fast. “I heard it on the wireless. They described the missing girl. They‟re appealing for you to come home.” “You haven‟t called the police?” Amanda asked fearfully. “You‟ve slept over eight hours. I could have done it then” she replied offended. “Why are you running away? Your mother‟s heartbroken.” “You know nothing.” Amanda retorted bitterly. “So tell me.” “I must go” she replied. “If I betrayed you I‟d have done it already.” she repeated. Amanda regrouped. She‟d misjudged this woman. She should apologise at least. Gathering her thoughts she described where she was going and how Griffin pursued her. “You poor love” the old woman replied sincerely. When Amanda offered payment she refused to accept it. “You need it to get to your Dad.” Stammering her thanks, she went to leave when there was a sharp knock on the door. The woman glanced through the window. Touching her lips warningly she signed Amanda to hide. “Just in case” she whispered. A moment later the woman opened the door. “Have you seen this girl?” Amanda caught her breath! Griffin‟s voice was unmistakeable. With her heart in her mouth she strained to hear the words. How had he tracked her? “Girl” the woman repeated. “Two work in the café.” 14 “She‟s long dark hair with a white blouse and denims. She‟s my niece” he continued. “Here….” “I‟m sorry I can‟t help” the woman repeated. “She pretty in that picture.” “If you see her would you ring this number?” There was an agonising pause and the front door shut. Darting to the window she saw Griffin climbing in a car. Moments later he‟d disappeared. “You‟re popular” the old lady chuckled. “Popular” Amanda screeched. “T-that was Griffin. If he caught me…” she shuddered. “Do you want to ring your father?” Amanda didn‟t know she was on the phone. Silly she thought. Being B&B she‟d have to be. Unfortunately there was no answer. “Wait there” the old woman replied. She reappeared with a dirty coat and trousers. “They‟re my husband‟s” she smiled. “He won‟t want them now.” Amanda stared. “I‟m a widow” she explained. I never threw them away.” Amanda concealed her disgust. They looked shabby and smelt. She was desperate but not that desperate. “You‟re very pretty” she observed. “You stand out. Everyone knows your clothes. These trousers‟ll go over yours and the coat‟s got a hood. It‟ll help in the rain apart from a disguise.” This woman had sense. She should be grateful for her help. “One more thing” the woman bid her to wait. From a box she produced a small false beard and moustache. “My husband kept these drama props. I thought they‟d be handy one day. Let me glue them on. It hardly improves your looks but it may save your life.” Amanda studied herself in the mirror. The clothes hung like a sack. With the hood and beard she was transformed. She could pass as a middle aged man. In her new persona she set off by the main road. God willing it would work Two hours passed and she walked with good heart. She came to a bus stop. The first one she‟d seen. Why not get a bus? It would get her there more quickly. She had enough money. While she waited a car passed slowly. She paid no attention. Soon it returned on the opposite side. “Come on bus” she said to herself. Her luck was in. A single decker appeared and not too soon. The same car passed again. Someone stared at her. Griffin wasn‟t stupid. He‟d realise she might be disguised. Should she flee? That wouldn‟t help. It would blow her cover. She scrambled on the bus. This took her to the outskirts of Norwich. Here she alighted. She‟d find the train station and finish by rail. She never got there. Was her spirit watching again? She thanked providence for her disguise. Over the road Griffin appeared with a burley bearded man. This was the end! Stepping in a convenient shop she waited with a pounding heart. It seemed ages before they passed. That was far too close. She noticed a newspaper, one of several on the rack. Snatching it she read about herself. Her Mother looked like the victim. “They don‟t mention Psycho” she snarled in fury. An open truck drew up and the driver entered her shop. One thing was clear. With Griffin close by she had to leave now! She could be anywhere except here. She‟d steal a lift. No sooner thought than done. Dashing outside she concealed herself amongst the crates. Not too soon. The driver reappeared and they were off. Slewing veering, it was one of the most uncomfortable rides she‟d had. But it did the job. It was ages before he stopped. Jumping from the back she hid behind a wall. They‟d stopped at a cottage. Moments later the truck disappeared. But where was she? Off her route she was safe but what about her journey? In the depths of the country she was miles from anywhere. She rang at the cottage but no one was around. There was a barn further back. Already it was dusk so she set off on her way. The main roads were still dangerous. She had to travel off the beaten track. At a village or signpost she‟d orientate herself. As she walked another problem arose. The weather had been kind but now it began to rain. The coat was warm but not waterproof. The rain fell harder, the wind picked up. In barely an hour she was absolutely soaked. She couldn‟t continue like this. Apart from the cottage she‟d seen no other house. It was dark and she was cold. “What the heck” she snarled retracing her steps. She recalled a barn at the cottage. It was a miserable walk. Trudging wearily, the thought of getting dry helped. At last she arrived. Shivering and exhausted she cast around despairingly. There was the barn. She prayed she could get in. The door was stiff but she forced it open. It was filled with bails of hay from the floor to the rafters. No matter it was somewhere to sleep. It was warm and dry. A good nights rest would prepare her for tomorrow. Settling in a corner another problem arose. Her clothes were cold and wet. Keeping them on would make her ill. She listened intently. The silence assured her. Biting the bullet she stripped to just her knickers. Undressing was a relief. In the dark she couldn‟t be seen. Draping her clothes over the bales she gathered straw for a bed. Luck was with her. Groping she discovered a blanket close by. It was too dark to see, how clean was it? It didn‟t smell and it was warm. 15 Beggars can‟t be choosers. Numb with exhaustion her crude bed seemed like heaven. Pulling the blanket round her she was soon fast asleep. Chapter 10 Raymond Chandler, forty something was of no fixed address. Orphaned in childhood, at sixteen he‟d been thrown on the streets. His life since was sleeping rough, working casually, scraping together enough money for his next meal. He‟d busked on the London Underground, playing his fiddle or harmonica. Now London was less alluring. Gentle, unassuming, he lost to competition. They stole his money then his pitch. Finally they beat him up. To survive he was forced to leave. He‟d headed northwards towards the fens. His needs were modest and temporary farm work suited him. He worked for nothing but received free meals. They cleaned his clothes and permitted him to sleep in the barn Additionally they gave him pocket money. He‟d been working on the land before visiting the neighbouring farm. He‟d made friends there. Like here he worked for food and somewhere to sleep. Now he alternated between the two. Waiting till the rain eased he‟d returned as dawn broke. Entering quietly he noticed the intruder. Who was hounding him now? Furious and apprehensive he snatched a heavy stick. This was his haven, his place to sleep. He‟d been driven out once, they wouldn‟t do it twice. Brandishing the stick he investigated nervously. “I‟ll be damned” he gasped beholding Amanda for the first time. He noticed her soaked clothing on the bale. “You‟re beautiful” he gazed at her with uncertainty and curiosity. She stirred and he jumped but she slept on peacefully. “I hate lodgers but you‟re different. You can borrow my blanket” he whispered. The straw rustled and she fidgeted. “Time you awoke methinks.” Taking a strand of straw he raised the blanket and stroked her bare arm. She opened her eyes then shut them. He gave a deliberate cough. Starting up she opened her eyes. “Don‟t be scared. It‟s all right” he pleaded as she stared aghast with terror. “Who are you? Please don‟t hurt me!” She felt appallingly vulnerable. “Calm down honey” he urged soothingly. “I‟ve been here while you slept.” “I‟m not your honey!” she stormed pulling the blanket round her. The thought of him there revolted her. “Ok” he replied. There was icy silence. “Pass me my clothes.” “They‟re still soaked.” “Give them to me!” she yelled. Normally mild mannered, her hostility irritated him. “If you‟re so modest miss why undress at all? What‟s frightening yer? Yer think I‟ll touch yer? If I was such an animal I could‟ve while you slept. It‟s my barn, my blanket. You come uninvited but I watched so you wouldn‟t be harmed!” Gathering her clothes he hurled them on the floor. His anger allayed her terror. She ignored her clothing. It was difficult dressing without first standing. He‟d see her anyway. “Sorry” she murmured sullenly. “Why are you running away?” Her eyes widened. “It‟s obvious” he added as she shrank back. “How?” she asked glumly. “There‟s no fool like an old fool. I‟ve been running since I was a nipper. Of course I recognise someone else.” She looked away. “What‟s yer name?” he asked at length. Even now she considered her alias. Much good it was before. “Amanda” she answered reluctantly. “That‟s nice.” He paused then told her his. “If yer said why you‟re here. Perhaps I can help.” Her fright was easing with his kind forthright manner. He was slight of build probably little stronger than herself. Could he be genuine? She described how she‟d fled carefully omitting Griffin. “Things are bad at home. I‟m going to my Dad‟s.” He stared amazed. “Yer need help” he replied at last. “Who‟ll help me?” she asked miserably. “Ravenscourt farm where I work.” “Why would they?” “The same reason they did me. They‟re decent people. I‟d trust them with my life.” He gave a sidelong look. “Besides yer need dry clobber.” “I‟m not sure” she said doubtfully. “They‟ll clean yer stuff and give yer a meal.” 16 “What are they like?” she ventured. “I said they‟re kind and ….” “I mean they won‟t betray me? It‟s on the radio and papers. If they give me away it‟s better you never saw me.” “So what‟ll yer do?” “I‟ll dry my clothes and leave.” “Don‟t be stupid! There‟s scum everywhere. Believe me I know. If some found you like this” he gestured at her. “It wouldn‟t be nice.” “Would they help?” she asked sheepishly. “I can get there in ten minutes. Then two more to return in the car.” He paused by the door. “While I‟m away put this rake against the ledge” he showed her how to secure the door. “Supposing the farmer comes?” “They‟re away for a couple of days. I feed the chickens.” As he opened the door he paused. “Don‟t go will you” he entreated. “I‟m going nowhere” she said. Hesitating he approached and kissed her. “Don‟t be alarmed” he said apologetically. “You‟re lovely.” Amanda smiled wearily. She was tired of running. The fear, the heartache. This family filled her heart. They‟d never love her but it was better than this. It‟s temporary she reminded herself. She had her Dad. For that she was grateful. By fleeing to France they‟d shake this curse. They‟d start a new life, one free from fear. She recalled her school vigil. Her fruitless wait for him. He must have been stopped. She felt suddenly afraid. What else didn‟t she know? What was her father up against? Unable to help she recalled her own position. She considered Raymond Chandler. Was he really that nice? The gentleman he portrayed? She imagined Ravenscourt farm. Security, dry clothes, companionship! Everything she craved. The prospect was tempting. She thought of her Dad. Would another day matter? Hopefully not. She had to regroup. The time dragged interminably then she pricked her ears. A car had drawn up, there were voices outside. One of them was Raymond‟s. Pulling on her jeans, the damp material felt like board. Her blouse was better. She opened the door. He re entered accompanied by a well built woman. In her late fifties her aspect looked friendly! “You poor child” she greeted her with a hug. “Raymond‟s told us all about you. You must come back with us.” “I d-don‟t know how to thank you” she stammered. Unconditional kindness. She‟d seen precious little of that. Her eyes watered. “Don‟t cry my darling” she hugged the young woman again. “We‟ll have you right in no time.” In under two hours Amanda was nestled in an easy chair. She‟d enjoyed a hot bath and borrowed a dress from their daughter Kate. At their request she‟d re related her adventures. “Kent” the woman mused when the young woman finished. “You‟re the girl in the paper?” Amanda hung her head. “Please don‟t say anything. I‟m going to my Dad‟s” The woman smiled kindly. “We won‟t hinder you.” Pausing she added. “One of my sons lives in Kent” “The farm‟s not for him?” Amanda enquired politely. “Frank wasn‟t so minded. Unlike Sean and Kate. They‟re with their Dad now” she enthused. Amanda‟s heart thumped. It surly couldn’t be? “What‟s Frank do in Kent?” she ventured uneasily. “He‟s a teacher” she smiled. “A bit different from the farm. Sean said he had the brains.” She recalled Mr James‟s words. Her heart raced, she could hardly breathe. There could be no mistake! She was her English Teacher‟s mother! She cursed inwardly. Of all the places to choose! Worse they knew about her. For a moment she considered fleeing. Then reality struck. Where would she go? They had a car, she stood no chance! She somehow endured the woman‟s chat. “It‟s funny” she continued. “Frank rang a couple of nights ago. He specially mentioned a girl called Amanda.” She smiled again. “That‟s you isn‟t it? The young woman gulped. “What did he say?” Her fascination almost matched her fears. “Not much really. He‟s very taken with you. Now I see why.” “He liked me?” She sat on the edge of her seat. 17 “He seems to” she grinned. The father, Mr James Senior entered accompanied by Sean and Kate. Amanda observed Frank‟s face in them but less in Sean. Over six feet in height her teacher‟s brother was much bigger and more heavily built. His muscles were further enlarged by work. Seeing Amanda his eyes lit up. “Hello my Angel” he grinned. “Can I steal a kiss?” With ease he lifted her from the chair off the floor. Holding her aloft he gave her a resounding kiss then replaced her. “Sean where‟s your manners?” his mother protested. “Please excuse my brother” Kate smiled. “That‟s all right” Amanda smiled and blushed. He was nice, very nice, if a little overpowering. Everyone laughed and the conversation moved on. Raymond joined them and a card game was started. The farm hand seemed adept at these. While he dealt Sean asked her to sit on his lap. “Please” he asked when she blushed and hesitated. She really liked him. But it could never be. “Don‟t pressure her” his sister chided. “Can‟t blame me for trying” he laughed good humouredly. The evening was convivial and she soon felt at home. In her happiness she forgot why she was there. Later in the spare room she tossed in bed. Instead of joy she felt anxiety and depression. These people had opened their hearts. If only her family……..!! Again she stopped herself. Her Dad‟s would be the same, she had to believe that. More than ever she wanted love, a secure family, human companionship. These dear people gave that, but she couldn‟t stop. She was nothing to them. They‟d been more than kind already. There was a darker reason. They were unaware of Griffin. Her presence placed them in danger. In France she‟d be safe. Nothing must deflect her from this. Next day she‟d press on. Her new life was just round the corner. The sun shone the following morning. After breakfast she donned her freshly cleaned clothes. Wearing them bought a lump to her throat. She left the man‟s trousers and moustache. The moment came when everyone looked uncomfortable. “I better be off.” Amanda declared. Struggling to look cheerful she really felt like crying. After an emotional farewell Sean escorted her to the car. For sometime they drove in silence eventually joining the main road to Great Yarmouth. Well out his way she expected him to stop. Instead he continued mile after mile. More solemn than she‟d ever seen him he drew into a lay-by. The sun was high in the sky. “This is it I suppose?” he gulped. Her feelings in turmoil, she was liking Sean more and more. She eyed him tenderly afraid to speak. “Hell” he snapped. “I can‟t let you go. I want you to stay with us.” “I must go on” she replied stroking her fingers through his hair. “Come back for a couple of days. I‟ll sort it at the farm then take you there myself.” She was tempted. Then she remembered Griffin. Each day endangered her Dad. Increasing the risk to them both, she had to move on. “I must go Sean. You‟ve all been very sweet to me.” Clasping her in his huge arms he kissed her passionately. Despite everything she didn‟t resist. She didn‟t want to. “You‟re not going” he said. “If I stay he‟ll find me” she replied without thinking. “Who‟ll find you?” he growled fiercely. “N-no one” she answered hastily. “Are you being threatened?” “No” she avoided his eye. “If anyone touches you, God help em!” he clenched a huge fist.” Amanda caught her breath. This was tearing her apart. “Goodbye Sean” she answered stepping quickly from the car. “Amanda wait!” he shouted. “I want to marry you.” She gaped at this sudden proposal. He scrambled from the car to join her. “I mean it” he added earnestly. “I‟ve never fallen for anyone like you.” He gazed with a passion she didn‟t think possible. “I fell for you last night. I know you don‟t feel the same. At least come back with me. I wanna make sure you‟re safe.” “You‟re so good to me.” she stroked his rough hair. “But I can‟t.” “I‟ll look after and protect you” he promised. She was almost overcome. For one mad moment she was tempted to mention Griffin. She knew he‟d try and find him. Then what would happen? She bit her tongue. Griffin was dangerous but clever with it. If Sean or anyone was hurt on her account! He waited for her reply. Putting her arms round his neck she looked into his eyes. “I can‟t marry you but I will see you again.” 18 “When?” he demanded. “Soon I hope” she answered softly “I must know when……….I‟m sorry” interrupting himself seeing her look of anguish. “Tell me one thing.” “What?” “Your Dad‟s address and phone number.” She almost relented. She was falling for Sean. This couldn‟t happen! “I can‟t do that” she replied decidedly. “Please don‟t ask why. I‟ll contact you I promise.” He held her tightly unable to speak then kissed her with a heavy heart. “Ring me day or night” he said climbing in the car. Slewing round he drove rapidly away. Standing by the kerbside, her eyes filled with tears. She watched the point where Sean‟s car vanished. Never had she felt so utterly alone. Never had she been so desperately unhappy. Worse by far then parting from Hannah and Michael. And that was bad enough. Donning her shabby coat she started walking. She still had most of Michael‟s money. Caution warned her to save it for emergencies Chapter 11 For half an hour Sean drove recklessly. Then with an oath he pulled up. He couldn’t loose her like this! “Why!” he roared helplessly. On impulse he slewed the car round and retraced the route they‟d taken earlier. He‟d be thirty five minutes catching her up. Pressing his foot down he tore along. He had to recover lost time. When he found her he‟d win her round. She had to come with him. He‟d beg if need be. He recognised landmarks from before and eventually reached the lay-by where they‟d parted. She‟d have done a mile, two at the most. He continued slowly, watching both sides of the road. One mile then two showed on the mileometer. He was sure he hadn‟t missed her. His heart surged wildly. There she was? The dark hair, blouse, jeans! He leapt out with a joyful shout. How cruel is fate! Her hair was etched, her face lined. The woman stared at him surprised. “I‟m sorry maam” he reeled with disappointment. “I thought you were someone else.” He drove ten more miles before halting in despair. She couldn‟t have got this far. She‟d either left the main road or been given a lift. Cursing his folly he turned round and made for the farm. Amanda had been walking steadily northwards. She‟d had a lift from a travelling salesman soon after Sean dropped her. Yes she was on the run but she had to take chances. He appeared nice and she jumped in beside him. He‟d taken her twenty miles till they left the main road. Now she was on her own. She focussed on her life to come. It kept her going. Unsure which way to go she entered a side road. A sign indicated a small town. Hopefully she‟d get food and shelter. Her conscience twinged. She‟d delayed another day! She pushed it aside, it couldn‟t be helped. She set off eagerly. As she continued she passed through woodland. It was truly picturesque. Encompassed by trees, sometimes the foliage met overhead. Bluebells carpeted the ground, birds sang everywhere. Later the trees thinned. She gazed on rolling fields and meadows. The Sun was warm and she felt at one with nature. If things had been different!! Reaching the town she walked down the high street. It was mid afternoon but she‟d had nothing since breakfast. People hurried to and fro. Each had a purpose, their goal for the day. In the parade of shops she saw a small café. She had money and she was hungry. They offered overnight stops at reasonable rates. With that booked she could relax. She found a park. Amidst trees and grass she sat on the first seat to hand. The Sun was pleasant, the world seemed to rest. She‟d reach her Dad‟s tomorrow. With that her thoughts wandered. A man approached on the path. Her heart bounded fiercely. It was surely her English Master. How had he found her? With a joyous shout she jumped up.- She stared in bewilderment. The path was empty! Everywhere was open. If he‟d fled she‟d have see him. “Amanda come back.” She spun round. How she wished Sean was there. Smiling he drew near and she leapt into his arms. “I‟ll protect you” he vowed holding her close. No one was there! She felt empty and alone. The ground undulated gently. She drifted timelessly. Deep tranquil peace. Chapter 12 She awoke with a start. Several hours had passed. It was dark and she felt cold. Men were shouting nearby. This was no dream! Clearly approaching they were obviously drunk. 19 “There‟s a chick. Lets have her” a harsh voice shouted. She froze with fear. Why had she come here? Starting from her seat she ran towards the entrance. At the café she‟d be safe. “Don‟t let her escape” called another voice. This was much closer. Four men appeared in the gloom twenty yards away. Gasping in panic she tore down the pathway, out to the road. Why was she mad enough to linger? Had she learnt nothing in her flight? Raymond mentioned scum and he was right. She ran wildly through the street pursued by her enemies. To her horror one appeared in front. He‟d somehow cut through? Screaming with terror she tore down an alley. God forbid it wasn‟t a dead end. “This way Paddy” thundered another voice. Another alley ran parallel. It backed on people‟s gardens. Here must be her refuge. Spurred by fear she scrambled on to a wall. “There she is” yelled an excited voice. Before she could jump she was surrounded. “Come quietly” if you know what‟s good for yer” drawled a harsh Irish voice. Sick with fear she recognised the speaker. It was the bearded man she saw with Griffin. “Go easy with her Paddy” another cautioned him. “She mine” Paddy grated. “Get down” he leered at her. She was trapped on all sides, a lamb amidst wolves. “Please leave me alone” she yelled. Their appearance made her sick. “Shut it miss or I‟ll shut it for yer!” Paddy pulled her down roughly then gripped her in a painful armlock. “Be good and yer won‟t get hurt. Cross me and….” he yanked her arm. She screamed with pain. Two others appeared and laughed cruelly. “W-What are you going to do?” she stammered fearfully. “Whadder yer think yer stupid bitch.” Paddy grated. “We‟ve a right one here” he added with a vicious smile. She was frogmarched along the alley. Turning into another they made for an open garage. Paddy was boss. No one crossed him. Indeed they seemed afraid of him. “In here you” Paddy pushed her roughly inside. Even now it dawned. Was the café dream a warning? Shutting the door she was blinded by a spotlight. “What shall we do with her?” one asked. “You‟re as bad as her” Paddy spluttered. “We‟re gonna ave fun! Must I spell it out?” Amanda‟s mind raced. She‟d no chance against them physically. Her only hope was compliance. Her revulsion must be shelved. Play along and maybe….. Could she somehow escape unhurt? “Remove yer togs.” She stared in dismay. “Did yer hear?” he roared. Her heart pounded, her hands shook. She could hardly undo the buttons of her blouse. There was a thunderous banging on the door. “Open up!” bellowed a voice. There was deathly silence. “Help I‟m being……………………” she screamed before being gagged by Paddy. “You‟ll regret that outburst miss” he hissed. The door burst open and three men appeared in biking leathers. “What the f…...s going on?” stormed one of the new arrivals. Paddy relinquished her in his astonishment. Seizing her chance she leapt clear altogether. “Stop her!” Paddy roared. Without looking back she ran like the wind. Fortunately there was a dispute. No one came after her. The terrified girl ran till she reached the café. As she reached it she listened intently. There was no sign of pursuit. With relief she entered and closed the door behind. It was imperative she reached her Dad‟s. More of this and she‟d go insane. Chapter 13 It was early evening at the farmhouse. The family phoned Frank who gave the history of the missing girl. “Sshh” the mother said urgently. They listened aghast to the television announcement. “A young woman’s been seriously hurt outside Norwich. She’s long dark hair and wearing a light blouse and jeans.” There was stunned silence. Sean leapt to his feet his eyes blazing. “He‟ll pay for this!” he roared. “We don‟t know it‟s Amanda” his mother cautioned fearfully. “We do!” he thundered. “I know who‟s after her. Frank‟s told me everything. If I‟d only known before” he clutched his head in despair. “What do you mean?” Kate screamed horrified. “Griffin! I‟ll find him and tear him apart!” his huge fist smashed the table. “Sean calm down” his mother entreated. Her words were wasted. Mad with rage and grief he stormed outside. The car roared, the tyres squealed. He tore away like a madman. 20 “Why didn‟t you stop him?” Kate screamed at her mother. “Why didn‟t you” she retorted passionately. “Like this no one‟ll stop him” the father observed. “God knows what he‟ll do” Kate gasped. Gritting his teeth Sean drove at breakneck speed. In his fury and despair, the vision haunted him. His Angel lying hurt crying out for help. “I should‟ve been there!” he yelled. His rage intensified, his speed increased. In less than three hours he arrived at Amanda‟s address. Parking nearby he grew cunning. He masked the number plates before approaching the house. His face softened momentarily knowing she‟d lived there. The lights were on and he saw red. Breathing fast he hammered on the door. The lights went out, there was deathly silence. “Open this door or I‟ll break it down!” he bellowed through the letterbox. There was a pause then someone approached inside. A man opened the door. Thanks to his brother, he knew this wasn’t Griffin. “Where is he?” Sean thundered forcing his way inside. “Who the hell are you?” the man shouted. Sean glared demonically. “Where‟s Griffin?” he growled. “What‟s going on Jack?” Amanda‟s mother appeared on the stairs. “Someone‟s looking for Griffin.” Jack replied. “He‟s away” she said. “Where?” Sean hissed savagely. “You heard” the man rejoined. “He‟s away so get out!” Almost exploding Sean pinned him to the wall. “Tell me where or I‟ll beat it out of yer!” he roared. Jack struggled helplessly in his captor‟s iron grip. “It‟s a nightclub in Norwich” the woman screamed. Sean eyed her without relinquishing Jack. “Write the address” he snarled. “Release Jack first.” “The address!” Sean thundered ramming his victim against the wall. “All right all right” the woman squealed fearfully. Writing it out she showed him the paper. “This better be right” he snarled dropping the semi conscious man on the floor. “It is” she assured him tremulously. Nevertheless he searched upstairs and down before rejoining them in the hall. Without another word he departed as precipitously as he‟d come. Chapter 14 Mrs James was right to caution Sean. Sleeping soundly despite her ordeal Amanda enjoyed her breakfast then left. In the cold light of day she considered calling the police. But would they help? Would these monsters be imprisoned? She‟d face countless questions and it could complicate seeing her father. It was too much hassle. She‟d press on to her Dad‟s. With that she looked about. For once fortune smiled. In the high street she‟d reached a bus stop, a single decker approached. It‟s destination was Great Yarmouth. Climbing aboard she felt elated. She‟d be there at last. Her Dad would welcome her and love her. Soon they‟d leave their troubles behind them. As the bus drove on she could hardly contain herself. When she got out she‟d ring him. So he wasn‟t there before, he would be now. He‟d drive out and fetch her. Her new life would begin. One with laughter, free from fear. Once in France she‟d ring the James‟s. She‟d explain everything. Hopefully they‟d accept that. Her life was with her father. She thought of each of them, but Sean stood out. His strength and rugged charm. She‟d never met his like. Would they meet again? She imagined herself in his arms. He stooped and kissed her!! She felt an intense longing. She had to see him somehow. The bus jolted, the dream vanished. How the vehicle seemed to crawl. Stop start, stop start. It waited at a depot for over half an hour. She was so keyed up she felt like pushing it. It was mid afternoon when they finally arrived. Too excited to think she disembarked. It was on the coast. Finding a phone box she rang her Dad‟s number. There was an ominous hum. Why wasn‟t it ringing? She feverishly re dialled. Again it just hummed. A chill misgiving gripped her. So the line‟s out of order. This wouldn‟t dash her hopes. She‟d find his address herself. It was a large town. With the aid of a map and numerous enquiries she eventually found the road she sought. Close to the coast, it was further up than where she‟d disembarked. As she walked down his road her heart pounded painfully. She eagerly scanned the numbers. At last this was it. She stared aghast! .. Her father‟s house was boarded up! 21 “Oh God no!” she screamed. In a frenzy she checked the house numbers. There was no mistake. Struggling not to panic she tried to think. Her world had collapsed. Her entire journey was for this? What happened now? She still had some of Michael‟s money but barely enough for overnight. The full enormity of it struck her. Was her father still alive? He‟d never have left without her. She reeled in despair. Nothing prepared her for this. As she wandered in a daze an idea crossed her mind. Would a neighbour know? The first house drew no response. At another a scruffy youth answered. “Left a few days ago” he replied offhandedly. She remembered her last phone call. “Do you know which hospital Mr Skinner was at?” “Nope. Didn‟t know their name. I moved in last week.” Thanks for nothing she thought desperately. She tried more houses but no one could help. In utter despair she retraced her steps. What should she do? She couldn‟t go on, she couldn‟t return. A light pierced her gloom. She‟d ring the James‟s. In open country, spies probably didn‟t patrol there, her enemy wouldn‟t know! She remembered the phone call. Without Dad around would he still pursue her? She sensed she was safer! But at what price? A lump rose to her throat. What choice had she? Sean came to mind. He inspired her. With renewed hope she looked for a phone. Down the road was a pub. It was called The White Horse. Entering she passed through a crowd of drinkers. There was friendly chit chat, human camaraderie. How she wanted that again. Finding a phone she dialled the number. After her Dad‟s she breathed nervously. At least it rang this time. “Please pick up” she pleaded. “Hello” Her heart leapt wildly hearing Sean‟s voice. “Sean it‟s Amanda. C-Can I stay the night?” “Amanda !” he yelled gleefully. Recounting her experiences she told him where she was. “Stay at the pub. I‟ll be there in two hours.” Hope runs eternal. Her euphoria almost matched her despair. This was the happiest she‟d been since arriving. Forgetting her troubles she purchased a drink and sat at the bar. Being the only woman she attracted some looks. But she didn‟t care. “Waiting for someone miss?” The barman passed her a drink. “Yes” she answered happily. “He‟s a lucky geezer” he eyed her admiringly. Amanda smiled and said nothing. She didn‟t feel like small talk. After an hour she looked at the clock. On a whim she decided on a walk. “You goin miss?” the barman called as she headed for the door. “I‟ll be back later.” “You shouldn‟t go alone miss” he warned blocking her path. “I said I‟ll be back soon” she snapped. “Be careful miss” he called after her. Stepping outside she felt the night air on her face. Clean and fresh after the pub she set off gleefully. Entering a side road she saw a park at the end. She‟d stay a few minutes then return to the White Horse. At the park entrance she noticed a young couple. They were kissing affectionately but looked up as she passed. “I‟ll soon have my man” she eyed the girl jealously. After walking a moment more she stopped. The sky was clear and from the park she saw some stars. “Help me lady!” To her amazement she saw a small girl. “What‟s the matter?” Amanda asked. The child wasn‟t more than seven years old. Why was she here alone? “My friend‟s hurt.” While anxious to return Amanda couldn‟t ignore the child. “This way” the child set off. “Is it far?” the young woman asked. They entered a row of garages. Suddenly everything happened. A hand gagged her, her arm was forced up her back. The child was a trap! “One squeak and I‟ll break it” hissed a voice in her ear. Mad with terror she recognised Paddy. Re living the nightmare he frogmarched her to a garage. Helpless in his grasp her anguish multiplied. Sean wouldn‟t find her. Thinking she didn‟t care he‟d return without her. That‟s what she deserved. Why involve him with her problems? They‟d been too kind already. “In there” Paddy pushed her on the floor. “Squeal and I‟ll kill yer.” “W-what do want with me?” she stammered almost loosing her voice with fright. He was alone, not that it mattered. He was far stronger than her. “A mutual friend miss” he rasped sitting beside her. Her heart pounded, her breath came in bursts. She prayed this was a mistake. The alley was deserted. No help would come from there. Her best chance was conversation. Keeping him talking would buy time. 22 “What do you mean?” she asked nervously. “Griffin” he glared at her. Her worst fears were realised. He was behind this. “What‟s he to you?” her mind raced. Was it conceivable? Could she talk her way out of this? “He‟s a mate.” “Why do as he says. If you‟re caught you‟ll suffer not him.” “He pays me well.” “Let me go and I‟ll say nothing” she promised earnestly. Her captor leered cruelly “But Griffin would. While we wait we‟ll have some fun.” “Perhaps I spy” she ventured cheekily. A big mistake. In fury he grabbed her throat. “Remove yer togs miss.” “Why?” she gasped struggling for breath. She cursed her stupidity. Antagonising him, she‟d bought this on herself. “You‟re less likely to leg it. You‟re a pretty bitch” he snapped releasing her. “Why should he have the fun?” “You mean Griffin?” she hazarded struggling to resume their dialogue. “Yer catch on fast” he rejoined sarcastically. “Take em off.” “B-but it‟s cold” she stammered desperately trying to stall for time. Like lightning he pounced forcing her to the ground. Pinning her, his hands grasped her throat. Now he didn‟t let go. “Enough games miss. You‟ll obey me or else.” He pressed her windpipe. She couldn‟t breathe. She struggled desperately but he was so strong. Bells rang in her ears, pain flared in her chest. Her strength was ebbing fast. Far away someone called her name. The pressure loosened momentarily. Suddenly she could breathe. Somehow she screamed. Then something hit her head. She felt a sickening pain. The weight vanished from her body. Her assailant was no longer on her. With a deafening crash he was hurled across the garage. “Come ere!” thundered a voice. She gasped with joy, her saviour was Sean. Grabbing Paddy like a sack of potatoes he smashed him against the wall. “No more” her assailant groaned reeling under Sean‟s assault. “I ain‟t started” Sean roared felling him with a murderous punch. He collapsed in a heap but was forced to his feet. With a sledgehammer blow Sean shot him across the garage. Amanda lay on the ground. His Angel had been hurt! Erupting with rage Sean attacked ferociously! Paddy lay absolutely still. “Amanda Amanda!” Crouching over her Sean patted her cheek. Breathing more easily she felt nauseous and dizzy. He viewed her anxiously. “I-I‟m fine” she gasped uncertainly. “Thank God” he exclaimed. “Can you stand?” “I-I think so.” When she tried her legs buckled under her. “I‟m so sorry” she burst into tears. “You‟re safe now my Angel. I‟ll carry you back.” With consummate ease he gathered her in his arms. Her head throbbed as they walked. She must have fallen asleep because when she awoke she was in the back of the car. “At home we‟ll get yer checked out” he said. That was all she remembered. When she woke again she was in bed. Sean sat beside her stroking her forehead. Kate stood at the end of the bed. Her head still throbbed, her throat felt dry as dust, she realised it was daylight. “Please forgive the trouble I‟ve caused” Struggling to speak she could hardly whisper. “Don‟t be silly” Kate remonstrated sitting on the opposite side to her brother. “We‟re thankful Sean found you in time.” “So am I” she managed a weak smile. Sean clasped her hand. The bedroom door opened and a strange man entered. “Thank you for coming Doctor Manson” Kate addressed him. He listened to her chest and back then looked in her mouth. He finished with her ears and eyes. “Does that hurt?” he pressed her at various points. She shook her head. “You‟ve been in the wars. But don‟t be alarmed. You‟re young and strong. With rest you‟ll be fine in two or three days. “So what‟s the matter?” Kate asked. “Nothing seems to be broken. She‟s suffering a reaction. Hardly surprising what‟s she‟s been through.” Leaving a prescription the doctor departed. 23 “Complete rest” Kate smiled to her after he‟d gone. The words seemed to float and Amanda knew no more. When she awoke it was dark. A small table light was on. Her throat was bone dry but her headache had eased. She was hungry and thirsty. “ How do you feel?” Mrs James was sitting beside her. Kate entered with some moistened bread and a glass of water. This simple fare was heaven. Never had water tasted so good. She drank one glass then two more. “There‟s someone here you‟ll like to see.” Feeling much better she looked up curiously. The door opened and her English Teacher entered. “I‟ll leave you alone.” Vacating her chair Mrs James stepped outside. For a moment she stared numbly. “You haven‟t forgotten me already Amanda?” he said. Stooping down he kissed her before sitting in the vacant chair. Part of her was delighted to see him but another part was almost sorry. Her concern was betrayal. His knowledge about her father, that accursed court order. He‟d report her behind her back. “You think I‟m bloody stupid?” She studied his face. “I‟ve never thought that” he replied gently. “You‟re a lovely girl and I‟m fond of you.” “Not fond enough when I really needed you.” She knew that was unfair but the words slipped out. “Personal feelings can‟t interfere with my profession. Surely you understand?” “Sorry I interfered” she snapped with bitter sarcasm. “How are you feeling?” he asked trying to change the subject. “Better no thanks to you” she snapped angrily. “I‟m sorry you feel like that.” Without another word he opened the door and left. She immediately regretted her words. It was too late. Mrs James entered the room. Was it her fancy or did she look displeased? “Can I see Mr James?” she asked. “He‟s got to get back. He only came to see you.” Amanda felt alarm. Her tone had chilled. “Has he gone yet?” “Get to sleep Amanda. You‟ll feel better tomorrow.” Once alone her guilt intensified. She couldn’t leave it like this. Struggling from the bed her legs shook but she could stand. If she could just get downstairs! Clasping the banister the steps seemed to stretch away. “Mr James” she called out stumbling at the bottom. “Amanda what are you doing?” Mrs James reproved her. “I must see Mr James” she pleaded. “Frank!” she yelled but her ex teacher was already there. “I‟m so sorry!” she entreated earnestly. He smiled kindly. “It‟s already forgotten” he said helping her to her feet. “You won‟t report me?” she asked anxiously. “Report you!” he echoed spellbound. “Wild horses wouldn‟t make me send you back. I‟ve contacted your mother. She won‟t contest your custody. Her words were. She‟s eighteen. She can live where she pleases.” Laughing Amanda embraced him passionately. Hugging her his eyes moistened. Mrs James reappeared. “You should be in bed.” The chill had vanished. She was smiling now. Amanda had done the right thing, albeit just in time. Moments later her teacher had driven away. Later in bed she opened her eyes. Sean was sitting beside her. He stroked her cheek then kissed her forehead. “I t-think he‟s still after me” she whispered. “Don‟t worry we‟ll take care of that.” He kissed her again then quietly left the room. Chapter 15 With each day Amanda improved. Inside a week she‟d completely recovered. With the family around, the threat of Griffin receded. Out in the sticks there was less to fear. Living with the James‟s raised other issues. Her mum was fine. Mr James saw to that. But her coursework worried her. Each day she‟d be further behind. There were also her A levels. More personally were clothes. Except for what she came in, she had nothing. She could borrow Kate‟s but that wasn‟t the same. She had most of her Dad‟s money but she needed a job, if only for her keep. That morning the family met. The outcome was as follows. For the last weeks of the school year she‟d stay with Frank and his wife Jean. There she‟d visit her mothers to collect her belongings. She recoiled in horror. Here she felt safe but there was very different. Griffin terrified her. “I can‟t do it” she gasped. “Griffin‟s not there now” Mrs James assured her. “But Frank will accompany you.” 24 “I‟ll come if you want.” Sean growled. “If he looks at you I‟ll break his head open!” “That‟s enough!” his mother snapped. Amanda smiled shyly. Her heart went out he cared so much. She said to them all. “I can never repay your kindness, but I‟ll get a job after my A levels. You won‟t find me ungrateful.” Everyone looked stunned. Mrs James was first to speak. “There‟s no rush. Job or not your home‟s here” she smiled kindly. Almost overcome Amanda gave her a hug. Then she embraced the father, Kate and Sean. No one spoke. Everyone was moved. The meeting finished and she retired to the spare room. It was where she‟d spent that first night and where she‟d convalesced. It was her room, more than any other. She‟d go there during the day. After a moment there was knock on the door. She was relieved it was Sean. Without a word he entered shutting the door. Then he sat on the bed. Something was troubling him. Her heart thumped. She was liking him more and more. Indeed much more than like! The thought of leaving him tortured her, but she wavered. Would he see this as a schoolgirl crush? Would he spurn her like his brother? If he did….!! It was unthinkable. Could she continue living there? He stared at her hard. His scrutiny unnerved her. What bombshell would he unleash? W-would you come out with me?” he asked at last. She laughed with delight. It was the answer to her dreams. Unfortunately he misunderstood. “You think I‟m a joke?” he retorted sharply. She realised her mistake. “I‟d go anywhere with you my darling” she knelt at his feet. In silence he stroked her hair and face. His tenderness was as awesome as his strength. “There‟s a movie in town” he said at last. “I‟d like to take you.” “It‟s a date” she smiled. His face relaxed, he kissed her slowly on her lips. She was on cloud nine. Now she knew he wanted her. “But I‟d like to get something to wear.” “You girls” he grinned. “I‟ll drop you in town then meet you after a couple of hours.” “You want to go shopping?” Mrs James put her head round the door. “I‟ll take you.” “See you later” he kissed her again. Driving into town she hardly said a word. Amanda felt uneasy. This woman was judging her. She sensed her words “You‟re too young. Sean needs a woman not a girl.” “So you‟re going out tonight?” Mrs James asked suddenly. Amanda‟s hackles rose. Had she been eavesdropping? “Yes” she answered non committally. “Anywhere nice?” Amanda sighed inwardly. “The Pictures” she replied. There were no more questions and after a while they stopped in the high street. “Take this” Opening her hand. Mrs James gave her fifteen pounds. “B- but there‟s no need” Amanda was taken aback. “I don‟t know what you like. You can get something you want” she smiled. Stammering her thanks Amanda felt so guilty. What she‟d thought about her earlier! “Sean‟s besotted with you. But he‟s hot headed. Can you handle that?” “It‟s early days but I wanna try” she smiled. Touring the shops Amanda felt she was walking on air. She bought an assortment of essential things including a tiny black dress for Sean‟s eyes. Mostly with Mrs James‟s money. Driving back she felt easier in her mind. Perhaps the mother did too? On their return Amanda hurried to change. In the privacy of her room she donned the dress. Sleeveless, tight, it was shorter than she thought. He legs looked good bare. She certainly had the figure. Finishing her face she heard steps on the stair. They were unmistakable. Sean entered her room. For a second he gaped spellbound. “You do like it?” she asked anxiously. “Like it!” his face lit up. “You‟re beautiful.” Lifting her off the floor he kissed her lips and cheeks. Downstairs in the hall he took her hand. Kate appeared from the other room. “I wish I looked like you” she smiled enviously at Amanda. Outside Raymond ogled her. In the car her heart raced. She knew she loved Sean. He was unrivalled. No one else came close. He was loving, caring and……... He literally swept her off her feet. But it wasn‟t just love. He offered protection. In his strong arms she felt safe. Parking at the back he took her hand. Purchasing tickets they found some corner seats. She didn‟t know the film. Being with him was all that mattered. Pulling her close he stroked her bare arm. It tickled but he continued. When she gasped he kissed her. Then he tickled her thighs. She stared blankly at the screen. For her this was heaven. How she wished she wasn‟t leaving. Back at the car the magic heightened. 25 “Do you fancy a ride?” he asked huskily. “Surprise me” she laughed. Her heart pounded, she could hardly breathe. She wanted him so much it hurt. After driving a while he entered a country lane. A moment later he pulled of the road. In a whirlwind of passion he smothered her with kisses. His intensity was breathtaking. “I thought I‟d lost you” he panted at last. “But you haven‟t.” She went to kiss him but he pulled back. “I reached the White Horse and you‟d gone!” Her jaw dropped. She eyed him nervously. “I was so stupid” she confessed meekly. “I was crawling up the wall” he hissed. “I thought you were dead! How do you think I felt?” “How did you find me?” she asked hoping to ease the tension. “The barman remembered you. He thought you‟d gone to the park. Getting there I was stumped. Luckily a couple saw you. They gave me hope. Running round desperately I called and called. It was tearing me apart.” His voice shook. “Then I heard you scream. When I saw him I went berserk!” Reeling with remorse her eyes filled with tears. “Please forgive me” she sobbed. “I love you my Angel. I‟ve loved you since that first night. You screw me up inside. I‟ve never felt like that with anyone. I wanted to hug and kiss you all the time.” “And you can” she clasped him in her arms.” “I was unsure how you felt. If I‟d frightened you that would kill me.” Totally overcome she hugged him. Seething with desire he kissed her intensely. The atmosphere simmered. The temperature soared. Emotions were at breaking point. In mad abandon he kissed her lips, face, arms and thighs. Chapter 16 It was late when they returned to the house. After a final goodnight kiss she retired to her room. She was happy beyond words but regret gripped her breast. The next day Sean was at an auction so Mr James senior drove her to Frank‟s. On the journey he spoke more than his wife. Amanda felt he wasn‟t judging her. “Will it be you who calms our firebrand?” he mused. “I love Sean” she smiled. “He‟s nuts about you. He‟s had girlfriends before but never this serious. I don‟t know what you‟ve done to him. He talks about you constantly.” With each mile Amanda felt more subdued. It increased the gap between her and Sean. After driving through the tunnel she almost wanted to call it off. Stuff my A levels. I‟ll get a job without them. Time and again the words hovered. The last of the drive took her past her old house. Instead of joy she quaked with fear. Just seeing it scared her. Her heart shot to her mouth. She couldn‟t breathe. This nightmare of nightmares! Griffin came towards her!! “It‟s him!!” she yelled hysterically. “Where?” exclaimed the father alarmed by her violent outburst. “Take me back!” she screamed paralysed with terror. As the car drew level she saw it wasn‟t her enemy. The stranger was his height but she couldn‟t blame him for that. “It‟s just a few weeks” the father said when she‟d calmed down. “It‟ll be easier than restarting at another school. Those A levels will affect your life.” Spare me the lecture she thought wearily. A short while later they arrived at Frank James‟s house. It was odd watching him speak with his father. He shared both her lives. The old one she desired to leave and her bright new one. The father left her with his son. Her suitcase was in the hall. “Jean‟s at her mother‟s. She‟s unwell so she‟s looking after her.” He showed her to an armchair. “Can I get you tea or coffee? “Coffee please Sir” she answered politely. It felt weird when he rejoined her. He was nice but that was all. What had she seen in him? Against his brother he seemed small and weak. She was being unfair. Frank‟s yer average guy. Kind, dependable, better than many, he paled alongside Sean. “Have you heard from your father?” Her English teacher asked. “His house was boarded up. I don‟t know where he is.” “I think they‟re making enquiries.” “I‟d rather they caught Griffin” she replied vehemently. 26 “He‟s not around here now.” “How do you know?” she snapped. “Your mother appeared last week at the school.” Amanda stared open eyed. “She had a different man in tow. His name‟s Jack I think.” “Why did she come?” “She thought the school could get you back. As I knew her she asked for me. I explained you were eighteen. No laws were being breached. I knew you were safe. Where you lived was not the schools business or hers. She accepted that. I think I told you at the farm.” Amanda grinned mischievously. “You didn‟t say I was with your family.” “No I didn‟t and don‟t you either. Griffin mustn‟t find out.” She shuddered hearing his name. Hopefully her fears were groundless. The school seemed flat. She enjoyed seeing her friends especially Sandra but so much had happened. Yet she needed those A levels. Sandra let her copy her missed coursework but she needed catch up tuition. Mr James was invaluable but John Symes helped with maths. How things turn round. He wasn’t grumpy with her now. Occasionally she went out, but everything had changed. It wasn‟t novel anymore. The urgency had gone. Even before her peers were pathetic. Against Sean they were nothing. He‟d crush them with one hand. As the weeks passed she missed him more and more. Her body ached from longing. It was the thought of him that kept her going. When she returned he‟d hold her aloft. After four weeks she rang the farm. Mr James said she could. Mrs James answered the phone. “Sean‟s been away but Kate and the others send their love.” “What‟s he doing?” “Just business” she was told. It was a bitter blow. She had to fight back tears. She wanted to talk to him so much. That evening Mr James accompanied her to her mother‟s. When they knocked she unconsciously seized his hand. “Please God he‟s not there” she was trembling like a leaf. Her mother opening the door evinced considerable surprise. “So the prodigal returns” she snapped derisively. “Who‟s this?” asked a stocky man joining her at the door. “My dear daughter” she jeered sarcastically. “I‟m collecting my things” Amanda explained. “She‟s trouble” the man eyed her strangely. “It‟s ok Jack” her Mum explained. She turned to her daughter. “Well fetch them and get out.” It was disagreeable to say the least. Gathering clothes and her accounts books she put some favoured records in a bag. Other oddments included jewellery, books and a teddy bear. The rest she decided to leave. Jack watched her narrowly. Although nothing to Griffin she was thankful her teacher was there. Two nights later she had a drink with Sandra. Michael and Geoff joined them. It was light hearted and fun. Michael dropped her after on his bike. “I remember the little skirt you wore before” he kissed her goodnight. Was she was over cautious being dropped two streets away? She knew she was right. The fewer who knew her address the better. Griffin still haunted her. Singing to herself she set off at a brisk pace. Then she realised her mistake. With the drink and feeling tired she was some half an hour from her teacher‟s house. “No matter it‟ll sober me up.” She turned from one street into another, her heels echoed on the ground. She caught her breath. A chance footstep, the half glimpsed shadow. Her heart leapt to her mouth. She was being followed!! “Please no” she gasped quickening her pace. The menace strengthened. Panicking she broke into a run. It made no difference. Her pursuer still tailed her. This was something else. At least Paddy was flesh and blood. This shadowy threat was worse. It had to be Griffin. If so he was clever. She couldn‟t see him at all. Why was he dogging her? Running like the wind she didn‟t stop till she reached her teachers. It crossed her mind. He‟d see her enter. Passing the house she turned into the next street. All was quiet save her beating heart. Nevertheless she made a digression. There was silence when she entered her teachers house. She was about to retire when something caught her eye. An envelope on the floor with ‘Amanda’ scrawled across it. Bewildered she opened it and read :“You’ll soon be safe.” It was signed A friend! Who knew she was there apart from Mr James? This certainly wasn‟t him. In the morning she let him see it. It was a mystery to him. “It says a friend” he observed. “Would Griffin say that?” 27 “He‟s no friend” she snapped uneasily. It was a month to her A levels. Yet it seemed forever. She longed beyond words to return to the farm. Chapter 17 Two weeks after this Sean and Raymond drove into Norwich. Parking at the back they entered „Lucys” night club. “Hope we see some talent” Raymond said as they sat at the bar. “You will. Lucy’s is the biggest.” “And the dearest.” “Are you gonna moan?” “Bit empty in‟t it?” Raymond observed sullenly. Sean sighed. “Haven‟t yer seen a club before?” “Yes” he said defensively. “It picks up later. Meanwhile try and pretend we‟re having fun.” Two strikingly pretty girls entered. “This is more like it” Raymond grinned. “Staff” Sean observed knowingly. The girls vanished through a door backstage. Soon one of them took her place behind the bar. “What I‟d give for a date with her.” Raymond sighed wistfully. “A snog would make it worthwhile.” “Ask her name” Sean teased. At that moment she approached. Made up with a fixed smile, her tiny vest emphasized her bust. “Can I help you?” she gushed. The farmhand stared open mouthed. “Two beers please” Sean replied. “My friend wants to know yer name.” “Tania” she wriggled coquettishly. After serving the beers she moved to the other side.” “Now you know.” Sean teased. “Amanda‟s got the edge on her” his companion pursued. “She‟d be prettier even wearing a sack.” “If she was here I‟d cuddle and kiss her” the farmhand sighed. Sean‟s eyebrows shot up. “Watch it” he joked. “Amanda‟s yours but she‟s gorgeous” Raymond persisted. His companion stayed silent. She was the reason they were there. Three hours passed. The club filled and the band was in full swing. A sense of expectancy prevailed. Tania‟s friend appeared on the stage. Wearing only a thong she wriggled and danced seductively. This won noisy applause. “It‟s what they‟ve paid to see” Sean addressed his star struck friend. “Haven‟t we?” Raymond tore his eyes away. “That‟s the sideshow.” Sean growled. “I don‟t follow” Raymond looked puzzled. “I want someone else” he explained. Raymond still looked blank. Tania had disappeared but a waiter served them more beers. Raymond looked round. Suddenly his eyes riveted on a girl in the crowd. Seated at a table her back was towards them. Her age, build, dark hair? “That‟s Amanda,” Raymond exclaimed amazed. “It can‟t be” Sean gazed intently. “Someone‟s with her.” A slim man with drinks joined her. Immaculately groomed, the sixties dandy. They chatted a moment then a well built man appeared from nowhere. “Hold yer horses” Sean hissed. The newcomer made for the dark haired girl. “Who‟s he?” Raymond gaped. “Griffin” Sean sprang from his stool. The man accosted the girl who looked up concerned. It wasn‟t Amanda but was she like her! The slim man was pushed away by their quarry. Trying to save face he protested feebly. “Get lost loser” Griffin knocked him aside. Sean stepped between them. “Leave him!” he warned. “Who‟s this bozo?” Griffin jeered. Sean promptly flattened him. Two bouncers jumped him. One was knocked cold, the other was hurled across a table. Four more were required to restrain him. Sean saw her more clearly. Amanda could have had a twin? Her enemy was also deceived. “Get him out!” Griffin dabbed a bloodied lip. “You‟re lucky I‟m not pressing charges mate, but take care! I have scum like you for breakfast.” Moments later they were out on the street. 28 “That went well” Raymond snapped. “Shut it” Sean warned. As they argued a well dressed man approached. “I think I can help” he said. “You what?” Sean‟s eyes blazed. On the point of exploding he struggled to contain himself. “I‟m Tom” he continued. “I don‟t give a monkey‟s ” Sean squared up to him. “Get lost before I flatten yer.” “Arthur Skinner” the stranger stepped back. “Amanda‟s father!” Sean‟s fury evaporated. “ What about him?” he growled. “Let‟s talk inside rather than here.” Taken aback, Raymond stared at each in turn. “What‟s to discuss?” Sean demanded suspiciously. “There‟s a pub over there. The Red Dragon” he indicated a small inn. “If you‟ve something to say spit it out then get lost.” “Hear me out” Tom answered. “Then walk away” he gestured symbolically. With a scowl Sean followed signalling Raymond to do likewise. Nothing was said till they were seated at a table. “So what about Arthur Skinner?” Sean demanded. Tom bought them a beer. “I‟m a good friend of Arthur‟s. A very good friend. I‟ve contacts in key places and trained men working for me. I get things done. I‟m managing his interests, but he‟s in a mess. He‟s had to flee to an address in France.” “Go on” Sean prompted. “Some years back Arthur and Julie fell on hard times. “Julie‟s Amanda‟s mother?” Sean interrupted. “Correct he had the gambling bug. Things were worsened by Julie‟s spending. She frittered money like water. On top of that she drank. By drink I mean it. She‟d finish a bottle of Gin in one night. With mounting debts he faced a court appearance. Their house faced repossession, they stood to loose everything. As a last resort Arthur approached this company. Bent as they come, it was run by a group of thugs. Griffin was boss, Paddy was his right hand man. Borrowing a substantial amount Arthur cleared his debts. It was out of the frying pan into the fire. Their repayments were exorbitant and that was just the start. The interest was punitive. When they defaulted it got nasty. Late callers were the worst. Twice he was beaten up. “Couldn‟t he tell the police?” Raymond spoke for the first time. “He didn‟t dare. Their marriage reached breaking point. Normally mild mannered he and Julie had blazing rows. On one of these he hit her. A moment of weakness he suffered bitter remorse, but it was too late. Amanda was still a child. The authorities became involved. Frightened he‟d strike the girl the court banned him from seeing her. Poor Arthur was distraught but to them he was the villain. At this change of events Griffin homed on Julie. While the others pursued Arthur he checked out the house. He became Julie‟s boyfriend. As Amanda blossomed she rapidly caught his eye. She recognised the vile bully that he was. He terrorised her and maybe worse.” “I‟ll kill him!” Sean pounded the table. “And how will you do that? You sorted Paddy and we applauded you, but you were hardly subtle.” “You what?” Sean gaped. “He‟s in hospital with multiple injuries. His life‟s touch and go.” “Good” Sean grinned fiercely. “I wish I‟d finished the job.” “Why didn‟t the Old Bill come?” “How could they know?” Sean asked nervously. “You attack a man and leave him for dead! You think they won‟t find out? Believe me you left clues. Someone even saw you.” “He hurt Amanda.” “Was she actually injured? Had she visible signs he hurt her?” “No I just thought…………………” Sean tailed off nervously “You see it‟s stacked against you. We know why you did but will the police? We admire what you‟ve done and don‟t want you in the dock. We pulled strings, recalled some favours and covered your tracks. You‟re safe now.” “What about Griffin?” “He flanked by guards but we‟ll get him.” “Not if I get him first.” 29 “He‟s too well protected. You‟d risk your life and be arrested straight away.” “What then?” “Leave him to us. We‟re watching him constantly. He‟ll get his deserts, we‟ll play him at his own game. We‟re also monitoring the girl.” “Monitoring?” Sean echoed. “A few nights back Amanda was walking home alone. One of my men tailed her but he thinks she saw him.” “So what do we do?” “Stay out of it and look after Amanda.” “How can I contact you?” For answer Tom gave his card. Chapter 18 With each passing week Amanda became more disconsolate. She appreciated Frank‟s help but nothing was the same. The magic had gone, the school, Mr James. She wanted to close this portion of her life. That evening her teacher was at a meeting so on impulse she rang the farm. Remembering before she wondered who‟d pick up. Was Sean still away? “Hello.” Her heart raced when she heard his voice. “Hello my darling” she laughed. “Amanda” Sean yelled delightedly. “When‟s my Angel coming back?” “My A levels start next week.” “Good luck” he blew her a kiss down the phone. “I‟ve missed you so much” she suppressed a tear. “We‟ll revisit that place. I‟ll do more than kiss you.” “Promises promises” she giggled happily. They chatted a while then hung up. She was on cloud nine. Just hearing him cheered her up. He made her feel alive. That night she dreamt of Sean. Should they take things further? Her body ached with longing. She wanted him more than anything, but her feelings had to wait. Her A levels began next week. Her evenings were dominated with revision. Mr James provided set book summaries, John Symes helped with Maths. There was history and Geography. It was almost too much, but her dedication triumphed. Four weeks passed and they were behind her. She could leave school at last. She regretted parting from Sandra. They‟d been friends from the start, but her life was elsewhere. She counted the days when Sean was due. How time crawled. How each day seemed to drag! Finally the day arrived, then the hour. When the car appeared her heart thumped wildly. As it stopped she could hardly breathe. “Are you ready?” That wasn’t Sean‟s voice. To her dismay Mrs James appeared. Friendly enough she gave no explanation. Her case was loaded. Just one thing remained. Entering the house she saw her English teacher. He eyed her wistfully. “I guess this is it.” She expected him to smile but instead he looked downcast. “Thanks for everything” she hugged and kissed him. Her heart fluttered. She couldn‟t forget the school dance. She sensed it was on his mind. “You were very special to me” he said. Her eyes widened. She could hardly believe her ears. “That‟s no cheap shot” he added. His words threw her sideways. “If you‟d only said before” she replied. “How could I ?” he answered wretchedly. “Until now I‟ve been your teacher.” “But you‟re married” she answered uncertainly. “Out of duty rather than love.” “Why?” “Jean‟s sister died and I wanted to cheer her up. It‟s not as tacky as it sounds. I thought I loved her.” “But you don‟t?” “ My heart‟s elsewhere” he gave her a beseeching look. “It‟s too late Frank” she replied hoarsely. He shrugged his shoulders and smiled. “Forgive me Amanda. Forget I spoke.” “Goodbye Frank.” Leaving the house she joined Mrs James in the car. She tried to think straight but Frank‟s words haunted her. He didn’t feel for her, he‟d made that clear. She had to move on. She recalled his words at the farm. She was still his pupil. He‟d acted professionally. Could she blame him for that? She remembered 30 his mother‟s words. Frank came to see her. All that way and she threw it in his face. That must have hurt. Yes she‟d made amends but….. Almost distractedly she yo yo‟d between the brothers. Until now it was simple. Sean loved her, she‟d grown to love him. Frank wasn‟t involved. Suddenly the door was wide open, which way should she turn? This preoccupied her mind while she acknowledged Mrs James. The moment came, the question driving her insane. “I thought Sean was coming?” she tried to sound casual. “He was called away.” “Why?” she had to ask. “Sean‟s got business affairs. I don‟t know everything he does. The phone rang and he left at once.” “How long will he be away?” “Hard to say. Perhaps four weeks.” “Four weeks” Amanda echoed dismayed. Frank was forgotten. After counting the hours, this was a crushing blow. A lump filled her throat, she couldn‟t suppress her tears. They continued in silence. The journey she‟d lived for all these weeks was a sham. At the farmhouse she fled to her room unable to face anyone. After a moment someone knocked. “Can I come in?” Kate entered and shut the door. “Love‟s course is never smooth” she observed sympathetically. “I‟m sorry if I was rude” Amanda struggled to compose herself. “He looked forward to seeing you.” she said. Amanda eyed her ruefully. Was it paranoia? Was she holding something back? She thought of the farm. Without Sean it wasn‟t the same. “Frank‟s got you a position. It‟s basic office work but it‟ll pass the time. You‟ll have some money too. He‟s left you the application form.” She realised what was said. Kate expected a response. “I can‟t thank you enough” she replied. Kate smiled reassuringly. “Where‟s Sean gone?” As she asked Kate looked away. “Just business” she replied vaguely. What business Amanda wanted to ask. She eyed the sister. Had her manner cooled? “Do you know when he‟ll be back?” she pressed. “Four weeks maybe.” Amanda said nothing. Her story matched her mothers. If it was true, why her doubt? Was it a cover? A scheme to split them up? She couldn‟t credit that. Sean towered over Frank. His love matched his strength. If a barrier rose, he‟d smash it down. Composing herself she followed Kate to join the others. Approaching the living room, Amanda heard conversation. When she entered it ceased abruptly. She sensed the atmosphere, they were withholding something. Without a word the father and mother left the room. Amanda felt dreadful. “What have I done?” she asked Kate anxiously. “It‟s not you” the sister forced a smile. She felt far from reassured. “I‟ll soon pay my way” she turned to go. “Is running upstairs the answer?” Kate eyed her. Amanda sank in a chair. “There‟s matters to attend to. I can‟t say more than that.” “Is there anything I can do?” “You can help me gather the eggs.” Until now she‟d never set foot on the farm. It was not large as farms go. Clutching a basket she followed Kate to a long narrow building. It was one of several. From the noise she could tell they held poultry. Inside were two long rows of cages with hundreds of cubicles. Each cubical housed two chickens. The birds could hardly move. The barred floor tilting slightly let the eggs roll in the trough. Following Kate between the cages she placed the eggs in the basket. It was hardly pleasant work. The noise was unbelievable and the smell made her retch. She continued doggedly. Kate was still her friend. She daren‟t upset her too. “You‟ll get used to it” Kate promised. Amanda asked herself. Did she want to? Was this the life for her? Cleaning them was better. She could sit in the sun. Kate sat with her, boxing them. Completely relaxed the two girls talked for hours. Kate treated her like family save for one thing. Sean‟s absence! Amanda didn‟t press it. She‟d gained an ally. She‟d back her if the chips were down. Kate worshiped her brothers. Amanda enjoyed her anecdotes as she liked relating them. One stuck in her mind. When Frank was fourteen he won a scholarship for his year. Some were jealous and set about him. Sean confronted them. Two were taken away on stretchers.” 31 Soon after dawn Amanda donned her business suit. Walking to the village she caught the bus to Great Yarmouth. It was her first day in the office. Two minutes from the bus stop it was on the sea front. There were already possibilities. She could shop in town or walk by the sea. The cry of the gulls added atmosphere. She was introduced to a motherly woman nearing sixty. “I‟m Mrs Perkins” she smiled. “But call me Vivian.” Introducing herself Amanda chatted with her new boss. Her task for that day comprised filing correspondence in the stockroom. The top shelf was so high she could only reach it climbing the wooden steps. So it lacked glamour. It was clean and dry. If she was unsure Vivian‟s office adjoined, and several times she did ask, but that didn‟t matter. Patient, friendly, Mrs Perkins was as nice as they came. Her lunch hour began at noon and she walked along the sea front. Although the sun shone a stiff breeze made it chilly. After snatching a sandwich she was glad to get back. From one till five o‟clock she worked diligently. Mrs Perkins praised how much she‟d done. The following day was much the same and the one after that. On her fourth evening Raymond was at the bus stop. “I wanted to meet you” He greeted her then kissed her cheek. “Hope you don‟t mind. Mustn‟t upset Sean.” Her heart missed a beat. “Is he here?” she asked eagerly. “No miss” he replied. “Where is he Raymond?” She turned on him. “I‟m not allowed to say” he avoided her eye. “Not allowed?” she echoed. “Please don‟t ask miss.” Amanda bit her tongue. Something didn‟t tally. At the house Kate greeted her. Just the three of them were at tea. At the table Kate remarked Sean would be calling for some papers. “Papers?” Amanda asked. “For the solicitors” Kate answered. Amanda forced a smile. Why were they keeping her in the dark? “Is he bringing that girl?” Raymond asked “Girl” Kate echoed warningly. “The pretty one we saw …………….” he tailed off awkwardly. Kate glared daggers. Amanda stared dismayed. This wasn‟t happening. “What pretty girl?” she asked desperately. Ignoring her he left the room. “She‟s a solicitors clerk” Kate snapped offhandedly. Filled with foreboding Amanda rushed to her room. If she was a clerk, why the secrecy? If Sean liked this girl when would he tell her? Would she have to move out? And where would she go? Staying with Mum was unthinkable. The more she agonised the less it made sense. Sean was her rock, her tower of strength. Was he really sneaking around? Betraying her behind her back? If he was he‟d surely say? Sean was no funk. It wasn‟t his style. Perhaps it was innocent. Maybe she was a clerk. Then why hadn‟t she seen her? Racking her brains, she prayed Kate was right. After a sleepless night she hurried for the bus. With the atmosphere at home she was relieved to get away. As the days passed Vivian showed her more and more. Then came the bombshell. She‟d been there six weeks when the old lady summoned her. Amanda felt uneasy. They‟d forged a good relationship. She could chat with her as a friend. What was wrong now? Had she blundered? Was she getting the sack? “Amanda I‟m so sorry.” Her stomach knotted. Just tell me she wanted to shout. “My husband‟s very ill. From next week I‟ll have to leave.” She added a bit more. Trying to sugar the pill. Amanda was dumbstruck. This was out of the blue. “So I‟ll have to go?” she asked uneasily. She‟d valued her independence. Loosing it would be a blow. “A young accountant‟s starting tomorrow. I‟ll be showing him the books. You‟ll answer to him as you‟ve done to me.” “What‟s he like?” Amanda asked. “He‟s newly qualified and much younger than me. I‟m sure you‟ll get along.” Amanda forced a smile. Should that make her feel better? With Vivian she felt at ease. She could chat to her despite the age gap. What was this bloke like? Would they get on? With Sean away now this! Her life had become a downward spiral. With considerable trepidation she entered the office next day. Her new boss had arrived. He was introduced as Norman Taylor. For much of the day Amanda shot him anxious glances. Reasonably attired, agreeable, could she work with him? For the next few days he was preoccupied with Vivian. Amanda understood. He had to learn the job. The day after Vivian left she felt nervous anticipation. It was worse than her first day. Almost immediately Norman summoned her. 32 “Amanda!” he greeted her. “Mr Taylor” she answered uncertainly. “Call me Norman” he smiled. “I‟m sure we‟ll get on fine. For the moment continue what you‟re doing.” Is that all Amanda thought to herself. He eyed her pinstripe jacket and trousers. “I‟m more informal than Vivian. What you‟re wearing is fine. However you can dress more casually! “Is Jeans and T shirt ok?” “Yeh or a skirt. Short ones if you want.” “Thank you!” Amanda snapped. Was that a cheap come on? “Anything else?” she asked abruptly. Opening a file he read her application form. “I see it‟s your birthday next week. Can I buy you a drink?” “Maybe” she hedged. If I‟m still here she thought. Next day she wore her jeans and t shirt. They felt strange in the office but they were more comfortable. Thenceforth she watched him. But he was professional through and through. Perhaps his skirt remark was just ill judged? A mistake she could forgive, he‟d be nervous like herself. Thus her first week passed. He wasn‟t Vivian but they got on well. As she became more at ease, she surprised him watching her. He immediately looked away. Did he fancy her? She was nineteen this week. Would he still ask her out? With Sean around she wouldn‟t consider it, but he wasn‟t and no one said why. Her nineteenth birthday came and went. To the family credit they did her a special tea, but what she really wanted was still so far away. “Sean‟ll be back soon.” Mrs James assured her. That was a start. Till now they‟d told her nothing. That evening was the best since her return. Frank dropped in and the silence and long faces became laughter once again. It was well after midnight before she retired to her room. She must have dozed because she heard voices below her window. A car had drawn up and Sean was standing by it. She couldn‟t believe her eyes. Delirious with happiness she raised the window to call him. The words froze in her throat. A young woman walked into his arms. In the porch light she looked attractive. And that was just the start. “You‟re very special to me” she exclaimed. “I‟ll always be here” Sean replied. Amanda gaped transfixed as she kissed his cheeks. Embracing her he kissed her on the lips. Then they got in the car and drove away. For a moment she sat motionless completely stunned by what she‟d seen. Raymond was right! This was why he was away. It explained their secrecy, trying to shield her gutless lover. Viewed dispassionately she couldn‟t blame them. The fault was Sean‟s. When he returned she‟d finish with him, and if she saw her!! Screaming with fury she tore her sheet to shreds. At length she calmed down, her eyes filled with tears. She cried as if her heart would break. Chapter 19 Looking at his watch Sean waited outside the Red Dragon. At length a figure approached. Moments later Tom joined him. “Alone this time?” he asked Sean humorously. “Raymond couldn‟t come” Sean answered guardedly. Leading him in he purchased two beers. “It‟s you I wanna see” rejoined his companion. Sean watched closely. He seemed in no hurry. “You‟ve been away from the house” Tom observed. “Not much gets past you” Sean replied. “While Amanda‟s in Great Yarmouth?” “I know about that” Sean interposed. “Alone unprotected” Tom eyed him critically. “It couldn‟t be helped” Sean explained. “I know why you‟re away.” Tom snapped pointedly.” “Off course” Sean swallowed his pride. “Regarding Amanda. Did you know Griffin followed her?” “When where?” Sean stared in alarm. “On Yarmouth seafront two weeks ago. It was a close call. She entered her office and that probably saved her life.” “Where were you?” Sean thundered. “I assume clients won‟t take unnecessary risks! However we‟ve seen to Griffin. He‟ll bother you no more.” “What have yer done?” Sean gasped. His companion opened a local paper. There was a picture of a car crash. 33 “So?” Sean asked uncertainly. “Here‟s my photo of the driver.” From a folder he produced an enlarged picture. Even in that state Griffin was unmistakeable. “A little accident” Tom continued imperturbably. “His only journey now is to the mortuary.” “Does Amanda know she was followed?” “No, and I suggest you don‟t tell her.” “What about the others?” “Paddy died in hospital. The other leader was shot. The remainder don‟t know her. Two were arrested and charged. The rest fled abroad. They won‟t be back.” “I don‟t know how to thank you.” “We did it for Arthur. Now I‟ll advise him he can come home. You can tell Amanda that.” Chapter 20 Simmering with anger Amanda reported as usual to her office. Instead of Jeans and T shirt she wore her tiny black dress. The first time she‟d donned it since that magic evening with Sean. “Two can play this game” she snarled. When she entered Norman‟s jaw dropped. “Y-you look lovely” he ogled her bare legs. “You said I could wear anything” Amanda snapped boldly. “O-Of course” he blustered. “Are you ok for tonight?” “Naturally” she cooed. This was some turnaround. Even yesterday she‟d have refused. “Can you take me home afterwards?” Norman smiled wickedly. “My pleasure” he replied. His eyes followed her all day. Usually that would irk her but now….!! There‟s other men out there. I can pull anyone she thought. Sean can go to hell. All day she tried convincing herself. Norman couldn‟t match Sean. Few men could. All boyfriends paled against him. She glanced at her boss who averted his eyes. Are you doing any work today? she thought. She called Sean to mind. This dress was for him. Wearing it seemed a betrayal. Her eyes gleamed, she clenched her fist. “He‟s blown it” she whispered fiercely. “Amanda” he called her to his office. “What” she snapped. “Will you replace this file.” He handed her a folder. “It‟s on the top shelf” she observed. “That‟s ok. If you climb I‟ll steady the ladder.” “Don‟t push your luck” she smiled. “You‟re not looking up my skirt. “Can‟t blame me for trying” he grinned. Viewed dispassionately she couldn‟t. She was giving mixed signals. That evening they drove to a wine bar. The evening was pleasant. She couldn‟t rate it more than that. After a drink they danced. Even now she was comparing him to Sean. Get over him she thought. He‟d jilted her. She had to move on. She smiled at Norman. “He‟s my boss, keep him sweet” she thought. Her motive was clear. She should be with other men. Sean had gone but she‟d show him what he‟d lost. True to his word Norman drove her home. She‟d have got straight out, but seeing Mrs James she gave him an ostentatious kiss. “I didn‟t know you felt like that?” he breathed. I don’t she thought. “Who‟s that?” she asked when Amanda was scarcely through the door. “A friend” the young woman replied hurrying to her room. Getting brought home was easy. Norman was eager to oblige. After a week she asked him in. Predictably it went down badly, you could cut the atmosphere with a knife. He couldn‟t leave quickly enough. “They don‟t like me” he observed wryly. “Don‟t worry” she assured him. The next day was hot. It was Saturday. The day was her own. Mr James was purchasing supplies. His wife and Kate were visiting friends. Raymond was at the neighbouring farm. “I‟ve collected the eggs” Kate told her before she left. “If you like you can clean them?” Amanda grinned. She had other ideas. She‟d seldom or never had the place to herself. “I‟ll sunbathe” she thought. I‟m alone after all. Upstairs she donned her skimpiest bikini. See what you‟re missing she thought of Sean. Placing a sheet on some grass she lay on her back. The sun was warm. It caressed her skin. Shutting her eyes she felt at peace. All was well with the world. She weighed up her life, one without Sean. She‟d cried all her tears. She had to cope without him. Norman would do for now. When 34 the right man came……! She‟d begun to doze when something ticked her thigh. Opening her eyes Sean was crouching beside her. “Hello my Angel” he smiled in honeyed tones. Galvanised she leapt to her feet. “How could you?” she yelled. Sean gaped at her stupefied. Screaming with anger she smacked his face. He made no response so she struck him again. “What the devils wrong?” He deflected a third blow. “As if you didn‟t know! You spineless lying bastard! I thought you were different! That you were a man! You might have had the guts to tell me.” “I was going to” he answered totally mystified. She glared at him wildly. “When?” she shrieked “Now” he replied. She laughed hysterically. “I know your grubby secret. We‟re finished.” “What are you babbling about?” he demanded. “Are you stupid as well as a coward?” She slapped his face with all her strength. Like lightning he grabbed her. She struggled and screamed but he was so much stronger. “You‟ll tell me what this is.” Gentle but masterful this was totally unexpected. More a whingeing apology, a feeble excuse? “I saw you hug and kiss her. I thought you loved me!” She burst into a flood of tears. “Oh that. Didn‟t they say?” “You expected them to?” “That‟s enough!” he thundered. “I don‟t need to justify myself, but you‟ll hear the truth.” Emotionally shattered Amanda gazed at him with tearful eyes. “Max was my closest friend. I‟ve known him since we were kids. Two years ago he married Camilla. Then this summer, tragedy struck. He died in a car crash. Camilla‟s a lovely girl but a family row estranged her. Her people severed ties and want nothing to do with her. When Max died she had no one. I went to help and comfort her. There were legal complications so it took longer. You shout all you want. I‟m not ashamed of it.” “Why kiss her?” she asked resentfully. “It was the eve of his funeral. She was falling to pieces. What should I have done? Push her away?” He let her go. Amanda avoided his eyes. How was she so wrong? “They could have told me” she muttered sullenly. “I knew nothing, then you arrive with this girl. What else could I think?” “They should have said. I‟ll speak with them.” “Where does that leave me?” she asked in a low voice. He glared intently. “You know how I feel. You think I wanted to be away?” His eyes gleamed. “While we‟re about it, who‟s this bloke of yours?” She reddened self consciously. How did he do it? Suddenly she was in the wrong. “I thought you‟d betrayed me. I wanted to get you back………….” she tailed off. “A fine thing” he snapped. “I wasn‟t here so you played away.” “You bastard!” she sprang at him. Sidestepping he held her firmly. His expression softened. “You‟re my Angel” he murmured. “Let me go” she struggled half heartedly “I love you so much it tears me apart. If any man touches you I‟ll crush him” he growled. His presence was overwhelming. When he kissed her she didn‟t resist. Her knight had returned. Her feelings exploded, she wanted him as never before. Locked in his arms she hugged him in a frenzy. “Let‟s drive to that place” he breathed. In a daze of joy she let him take her hand. She stared agog. It was an open topped car. “Where did this come from?” “It‟s Max‟s. Camilla can‟t drive so she let me borrow it.” “But the accident….” she began. “He was the passenger” Sean interrupted. “A trip in a colleagues car.” “I can‟t go like this” she eyed her bikini. “You can” he grinned mischievously. Moments later they were speeding down the road. The wind cooled her bare skin and rushed through her hair. From despair she was ecstatic. This was all her dreams in one. At some traffic lights they stopped. Cheering and wolf whistling four men cyclists appeared. 35 “Hello gorgeous” two of them blew kisses at Amanda. “Christmas come early mate?” another grinned at Sean. On the green light he shot away leaving them behind. Soon after that they drew up by the field. To one side was a group of bushes. The grass danced in the wind. This was their special place. Their passion even stronger, as he paused she leapt from the car. “You‟ll have to catch me” she laughed. Delirious with happiness she ran across the grass. He pursued her vigorously. Grasping her in his powerful arms he whirled her aloft only lowering her to kiss her before spinning her madly. Both were breathing heavily when they collapsed on the grass. “I love you my Angel” he breathed. It seemed so right when he slipped off her top. He fondled her breasts before a frenzy of kissing. His fingers were electric. Tickling her all over they set her body alight. Removing her bottoms she was naked in his arms. Surging higher yet she was riding the storm. He whirled her aloft. “I love you so much” she was panting with desire. “My life was for this moment.” Cradling her he kissed her neck and chest. Red hot, fiery! He kissed her lower then still lower. Intoxicated with passion it was as if she couldn‟t breathe. The garden of Eden. If only this could last forever. In the lee of the bushes he laid her on the ground. A blazing chariot in the sky. Their passion and love intensified. The fire, the fury, the frenzy of unbridled passion. Wild, uncontrolled, that afternoon they went to paradise and back. Chapter 21 Three months had passed. At the house a party was in full flow. There was much to celebrate. She was engaged to Sean. Amidst the music the glasses were filled. All the family were present including Frank. Many family friends were unfamiliar. Amanda was delighted when Sandra arrived with Geoff. “I was hoping you‟d come” she kissed and hugged her old school friend. It seemed weird seeing her. When Raymond appeared he kept kissing her. “I‟m not engaged to you” she joked. “A bloke can dream” he grinned wistfully. Speaking to everyone the time flew past. Once she was alone with Frank. She was unsure. Her crush was gone but what about his? “I have my own announcement” he smiled. “Jean‟s left me.” Amanda‟s face fell. “But I‟ve met Cheryl. She‟s really special. Unfortunately she couldn‟t come tonight.” It was the icing on the cake. Laughing with joy Amanda kissed him. She was deeply moved he‟d found happiness. In her heart he still had a place. Almost overcome she walked outside. She needed solitude, a moment to reflect. The sky was clear and she noticed the Moon. It recalled her journey. She went to the front, it was quieter there. The country lane was bathed in moonlight. A shadow stirred on the road. Were her eyes playing tricks? The shadow moved again. More definitely now. Her heart missed a beat. A man was approaching! For a second she panicked. Had Griffin somehow found her? She thought he was dead. Was it a mistake? Even now he could destroy her! As he came closer she saw his silhouette. Thank God it wasn’t Griffin. Her heart thumped madly, not with fear now. Was it conceivable? In a daze she opened the gate. The figure approached. She could see his face! It was surely………?? “D-Dad” she called tremulously. “Amanda” she heard him answer. His voice, his face! Cherished childhood memories engulfed her. Beside herself she rushed to embrace him. “My darling Amanda!” he hugged her passionately. Utterly overwhelmed she cried inconsolably. The impossible was realised. All her childhood prayers were answered. “I thought I‟d never see you again” she sobbed. “I owe Tom everything. His gang gave me a new ID. I‟m Laurence Fisher now. I‟ve papers to prove it.” “Laurence Fisher” she repeated puzzled. “Aside from his debt, Arthur Skinner‟s banned from seeing his beautiful daughter.” Overcome with emotion he paused. “But Laurence is ok” he added at last. “Won‟t they find out?” she asked. “Hopefully not” his voice shook. “They‟ll have to kill me to keep me from you.” “How did you find me?” she ventured at last. “Sean James spoke to Tom who contacted me. Sean then told me everything. He arranged for me to come tonight. I came by cab but walked the last bit to clear my head.” Dizzy with emotion they entered the house arm in arm. They were greeted with a rousing cheer. Amanda found it too much. Her vision swam, sounds blended into one. The next thing she knew, Sean and Kate were crouched beside her on the floor. 36 “Don‟t crack up now my Angel” Sean joked. Laughing and crying she hugged him. “Why didn‟t you tell me?” she protested at last. “I turned detective while I was away. I couldn‟t spoil the surprise.” That wasn‟t the only one. By and by the cake was cut. There was an expectant silence. Everyone sat round the room. Everyone save Sean. Grinning from ear to ear he took Amanda‟s hand. From a box he produced a diamond solitaire. To rousing cheers he placed it on her finger. A lump came to her throat. Her eyes filled with tears. “Why am I crying?” she laughed nervously. They all knew the answer. Trying to compose herself she sat on his lap. Never in her life had she been so happy. Peter Parish 37